Love & Life with Dr. Karin

Love & Life with Dr. Karin

Take charge of your thoughts, take charge of your life! On Love & Life, Dr. Karin explores research-based methods for happy, hopeful, positive living! She delves into all the good stuff—how to have true intimacy in romantic relationships, more meaningful friendships, healthier family connections, and more fulfilling careers. Each episode leaves listeners with a Love & Life Hack—a quick fix to improve your emotional wellness TODAY! Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/love-and-life-media/support

Episodes

October 20, 2021 54 min

I hear this question from women in my community all the time—“I have an anxious attachment style. Will I ever be able to be in a secure relationship?”

To address this concern, psychotherapist Elliott Anderson and I take a deep dive into anxious attachment and how it impacts dating and relationships.

Specifically, we discuss:

  • Anxious attachment and our desire for intimacy.
  • Trauma bonds and anxious attachment.
  • When feeling anxiety in a...
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    So often when we discuss self-worth and self-esteem, we speak in vague terms about “loving ourselves” first. And sure, we know it starts with us. But what specifically can we DO? What tangible steps can we take to begin to feel worthy of love—especially if we’ve never felt this before?

    Anita Stoudmire of Better Love Movement joins me to share practical strategies for building into ourselves first which, in turn, positions us for at...

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    If you’ve ever struggled to believe you deserve love, you’re not alone. Many of us grew up in emotionally toxic or traumatic home environments. It’s hard to cultivate self-love and acceptance when no one has ever built us up, believed in us, and cherished us.

    Author and mindset coach, Leisse Wilcox, wrote the book (literally!) on how to love ourselves—To Call Myself Beloved a Story of Hope, Healing, and Coming Home. She joins me to...

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    This week Love & Life partners with Veronica Grant’s “How to Actually Feel Worthy in Love” Podcast Tour! We’re one of 12 podcasts invited to delve into what it truly takes to date from a place of authenticity and confidence so as to build a healthy, happy relationship. But, how can we do so if we don’t fundamentally believe we deserve love?

    Psychotherapist Elliott Anderson joins me to share a critical strategy he implements wit...

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    If you’ve ever said, “I really want to date, but I can’t get back out there until I feel confident with my body,” you’re not alone. Most women have wrestled with body image at some point—or at MANY points—in their lives. Veronica Grant understands this struggle and provides powerful strategies for finding where “healthy meets happy” regarding our physique, nutrition, and romance. Join us as we explore themes surrounding:

  • Healthy ea...
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    If you’re single, your love life (or lack thereof) is fair game. Friends, family members, and even random strangers provide “solutions” to your “problem.” Or, they interrogate you, determined to uncover the hidden reason you aren’t coupled up—even if you’re perfectly content sans partner!  In this Love & Life bonus episode, Debbi Rice of Single and Amazing, Leslie Kaz of Single Girl Bliss, and I discuss the top 5 asinine commen...

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    What happens when you always wanted to be a wife and mother, but you haven’t met your person? Well, if you’re author Melanie Notkin, you start a fabulous brand called, Savvy Auntie! Melanie joins us for a vulnerable and candid discussion about how to embrace and thrive in a life we wouldn’t have scripted. We center the conversation around her poignant and powerful book, Otherhood. Specifically, we delve into:

  • How women of The Other...
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    It’s National Unmarried and Single Americans Week!  To kick it off, I’ve invited Shani Silver, host of A Single Serving podcast, to share how she moved from complaining about dating to championing the single life!  According to Shani, “I came out of a hole and I know the way out of the hole. I want to tell other people that it’s possible.”  Here are a few more gems of wisdom from my conversation with Shani:

  • “Enjoying a single life—...
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    After 21 years of dating, serial monogamy, breakups, and periods of feeling miserably alone, Leslie Kaz was over it! Tired of what she calls “The Endless Search” for a man, Leslie decided to take a 6 month break from dating. During those 6 months, Leslie completely redefined herself and her life—so much so, that she abandoned “The Endless Search” and stepped into a brand new way of living! She shares her philosophy in her book, Sin...

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    It’s National Unmarried and Single Americans Week and to celebrate, I’m sharing the first chapter of my book, Single is the New Black:  Don’t Wear White ‘til it’s Right! One of the main myths singles hear is that they’re somehow fundamentally flawed and that’s why they haven’t met their person—if they’d just “fix themselves” already, true love would finally come their way. Yeah, right. I take issue with this bogus assumption and mu...

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    Women without children walk the road less traveled—and for the vast majority of them, this path was not of their choosing. In fact, of the women who reach midlife without children, only 10% planned to be  “child free”, while 10% are childless due to infertility, and a full 80% are childless not by choice but rather, due to circumstances. Jody Day of Gateway Women shares her personal journey and discusses the many layers of disenfra...

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    In this Love & Life Q&A episode, I answer the following questions:

    1. “Jessica” really wants to remain friends with her ex. This breakup is even harder than most because they trauma bonded throughout 2020 when she turned 40 and also lost her father. Is it possible they could actually remain friends?

    2. “Danielle” hasn’t spoken to her ex for over a year but she still thinks about him. She knows she needs to move on but like ...

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    “We’ll be besties forever!” “No matter what happens, we’ll stay close.” “You’re my BFF and nothing will change that!” We said it. We meant it. But life happens, and it gets in the way of even the closest friendship. And sometimes it hurts—a lot. But we CAN remain close—as we talked about in last week’s episode—by examining our expectations. My BFF, Miriam Conner, joins me to share her philosophy on friendship—the “No Pressure” frie...

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    When asked what we treasure most, people readily respond with one word—relationships. Our friends, family, and romantic partners enrich our lives in myriad ways, providing encouragement, support, affection, and joy.

    Except when they don’t.

    When our relationships are in crisis, our life is in crisis and when they’re thriving, we thrive. As Tony Robbins puts it, “The quality of your life is the quality of your relationships.”

    So, why...

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    It’s time for another Love & Life Q&A episode! We have three questions to tackle today.

    1. One listener wants to know how to ask a guy out. She lives in Ireland and finds Irish men are often hesitant to take the lead. Can she ask him out while still dating empowered?

    2. A second listener struggles to find the motivation to date after a year of lockdowns and Covid malaise. But she’s in her late 30s and worries about her biol...

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    Sometimes, if we’ve been single for a while—or longer than a while—we begin to doubt ourselves. We wonder why love seems so hard to find. Are we doing something wrong? Is there a particular quality we’re missing? What are men looking for anyway? Well, here’s the good news. You have exactly what your person is looking for! I promise. And, it’s not just my opinion, it’s what science says! Psychologist David Buss studied men and women...

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    On Love & Life we talk about beliefs all the time—because they’re incredibly powerful and they impact every area of our lives—especially our love life. What we believe about ourselves and what we believe we have to offer a partner sets the tone we bring to our dating efforts and experiences. And sometimes, we hold beliefs that assert influence over us, but we don’t even know we hold these beliefs! On today’s episode, psychother...

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    Sexless in the city? Isn’t that a contradiction in terms? In our hyper-sexualized culture, it appears everyone is hooking up without concern—giving no thought whatsoever to the impact casual encounters have on our soul and psyche. But this perception may not be the reality—it certainly isn’t for blogger and author Kat Harris. Kat has thought deeply about sex—its place in her life as a Christian, single woman and its role in society...

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    I’ve rolled out a few reels over the last couple months talking about cultivating an empowered mindset for empowered dating! But unfortunately, for some of you watching overseas, the audio won’t play when music is placed behind the vocal track (perhaps it’s a licensing issue in some countries?) When I learned some of you weren’t able to hear the audio, I figured the best way to work around this problem would be to share the reels v...

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    Tausha Pearson would tell you, “It all started with a ‘crazy’ single mom tax return…” “Crazy” meaning—she had a chunk of money she didn’t need. So, she took that tax return and spent it on a trip to Haiti. While touring Haitian orphanages with 11 social work interns, Tausha learned 80% of the orphans had families who desperately wanted them home but couldn’t afford to feed and educate them. In addition to this sad reality, she disc...

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