94. ¿Por qué siempre estoy insatisfecho? | Leonardo Assennato

En este episodio hablaremos de insatisfacción crónica. Nuestro invitado, Leonardo Assennato habla de las principales fuentes de la insatisfacción, identifica señales de alerta y comparte estrategias prácticas para transformar tu vida. Descubre cómo superar la insatisfacción persistente y cultivar un sentido de bienestar emocional y mental.
En este episodio hablamos:

• Los diferentes niveles de insatisfacción: insatisfacción del placer, insatisfacción de proyecto de vida e insatisfacción de propósito.
• ¿Qué hay detrás de una persona insatisfecha?
• La diferencia entre ser agradecido y estar contento, con ser feliz y estar satisfecho con tu vida.
• La insatisfacción con quién eres viene de la falta de responsabilidad en un aspecto de tu vida.

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Sigue en Instagram a Leonardo Assennato@dirigirconexito
Escucha el episodio sobre productividad que grabamos con Leonardohttps://www.spreaker.com/episode/52-productividad-y-manejo-del-tiempo-leonardo-assennato--43909195 
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El Club de Impacto es producido por Milky Wave Media.

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
Hello everyone and welcome to the newepisode of the impact club. I'
m Andrea Palacio. Today I amsuper excited, super happy because we bring
up a stalking theme and I wantto start by asking these questions so that
we go into the subject little bylittle and that you identify yourself a little

(00:24):
while listening to them if you arethose people who are constantly wondering why.
I always feel like I need something, why it seems like I' m
never happy with what I have.There' s always something to improve or
because I don' t enjoy thingslike I did before. Well, feeling

(00:45):
that things are sometimes not as wethink or as we would like them to
be. It is something that Ithink we have all experienced at some point
where, well, it seems thatour successes are still not as we would
like them to be. Our relationshipIt also seems that they are not enough
or that we do not have thethings we want. Well, that'

(01:06):
s called chronic dissatisfaction and it's today' s subject with a guest
that if I could put long tableclothsthat if I could put a red carpet
here I really would put it.I want to tell you this is the
second time he' s been hereon the podcast, at the impact club.
But the first episode we recorded aboutproductivity is the one that historically,

(01:29):
more people have made good comments tome, more people have come to ask
me to comment. The one thathas been shared most historically and also whenever
someone asks me, Andrea, ifyou could recommend a first episode to start
listening to the impact club, anepisode that contains the essence of what you

(01:52):
want to share. I always sharethe episode I recorded with our guest today.
Leonardo makes a natural life. Ithank you very much again for the
invitation. The time. First timea privilege and again this is a greater
privilege, because throughout this time wehave been building affection, a relationship,
we have become more known and,evidently, you are more important today.

(02:15):
So it' s a privilege forme to be here with you again,
Andrew. Thank you, not becausethe privilege now is ours, because,
moreover, Leonardo has a characteristic that, besides making us understand the subject,
gives us very practical things to applyin our life. It is simply not

(02:36):
a theoretical thing to keep thinking about, but it helps us to put things
into practice. Once we finished listeningto the episode and now I made it
hard for you to read because Iput you a theme that I think is
difficult, because it' s somethingwe' ve all experienced. But it

(02:57):
also seems to me that with popculture, with social networks, with the
media, this feeling is enhanced thatyou constantly have to live incredible experiences.
To see you, to dress you, to feel fabulous, to have many
friends the love of your life,to enjoy good is a constant pressure that

(03:22):
leaves us, therefore, a sensationor one a glasses outward as envy and
inward as disappointment. And it's about dissatisfaction. Let me start telling
you a story. You know Ilike to tell stories. So I'
m going to start with this,which didn' t happen a long time
ago, because this subject of dissatisfactionseems to me to be a subject of

(03:45):
almost every human being. And Itell you almost what I' m going
to tell you. Or this isa guy who' s already an older
person in eighty- nine years andhe says hey, Leonardo, I'
m gonna get to Queretaro. Imean in Queretaro, I' m gonna
get to Queretaro and go see amedical visit. I need you to tell
me how to get there. Thenit was easy for me to say uncle,
I' ll come by for you, I' ll take you to

(04:09):
the doctor' s appointment and it' s okay He says no. No,
no, I want to interrupt youand I don' t have a
problem. I' m gonna takeyou or it' s okay. Not
to be long stories. I wantto tell you a series of events that
happened to put this contrast of asatisfied person. A verse is a dissatisfied
person. We got to the doctora little late. He' s late,
and the doctor starts by saying," Well, he' s late

(04:30):
" I can' t take careof you right now. Then you have
to make another appointment. For meit was like not waiting for me it
comes from far as you think.He is eighty- nine years old and
he with all patience and says okwhen then I say it for today.
Please, yes, you have towait an hour and a half and my
mind saying how nothing else is possible. It took ten minutes. It wasn
' t for more they should puta little consideration. It' s already

(04:54):
an hour and a half. I' ll tell him well, we have
to wait. Now and a halfsays ok, let' s take advantage
of the time, let' seat, we get out of there and
we' ll find a place toeat. And in this walk the traffic
and I say that there are peoplebe careful, don' t go walking
with a calm. That' snot the way it absolutely happens. So
I, like, as you knowsaturated, you have to go with meat

(05:15):
careful, I don' t knowwhat. And he, walking in all
the quiet, we went to eata restaurant. They attend to him asks
for what he asked for a fishand he enjoying and joyfully enjoying his fish
and me saying did not fail themthis quality. It' s not possible.
Things didn' t go as Ialways thought. So third element.
Me, then, trying to continuallyimprove your food experience. There was one

(05:40):
person singing in a pianist and soon and I said he lost his handwriting.
It is not well coordinated, toolow volume, the volume that if
you sing well, that you singwell and he enjoying the incredible music.
We left the food now to getback to the doctor and it starts raining.
So I' ve been walking awayso I don' t take advantage

(06:03):
of the time. It' sstarting to rain and I' m just
like that, not that I saw. Just after all this has happened,
he dedicates himself to artemian painting.Then it stops half or it opens the
clouds and says if you were apainter like me, how would you paint

(06:23):
these beautiful and at that moment Andreafell on me twenty of how many times
I had issued a complaint during thatday of things that did not happen as
I thought my expectation, that theyhad to be. And a person like
him who has the ability to enjoyor not to complain is not the first

(06:46):
time that happens to me. AtChristmas a few years ago I was going
to buy her a cell phone,so she tells me I don' t
need it. Tell me if youhave any urgency and you need to talk
to me, please, I needyou to have a cell phone. Then
they tell me you don' tneed it. He walked out of the
store and Uba put him back inthere and then I' ll tell him,
please, buy one and why youalmost had an emergency. He keeps

(07:08):
thinking and he tells me it's nard. I haven' t had
an emergency in the last five years. I really don' t need it.
It is these contrasts andres of thislife that can be enjoyed calmly that
does not mean that it is notproductive. He' s a very productive
person. However, there is acalm this I call you now, not

(07:31):
the invincible calm that makes you faceany storm. And this mind full of
expectations that in a rush of life, that things have to happen perfect,
that the game of life is toachieve things inevitably and that we can'
t be wrong, because if thingsdon' t happen as we think and

(07:53):
dream, something is wrong. NoAnd in this which you commented and in
this comparison with others of success happiness, it seems that we are not giving
sufficiency And then we have a wholefeeling found within us. So this topic
is very interesting. Speaking with thiscontext of openness, we will try to

(08:15):
make it clear where dissatisfaction lies.We are going to try to put three
elements from where dissatisfaction occurs and,obviously, we are going to try to
dialogue you and I by verbalizing alittle how we could do it in exercises
to live more satisfied with life andnot in these absences of joy or contentment,

(08:41):
simply because life does not happen aswe have the idea that it should
happen. And it seems to methat, because life participates with us.
One of the things I' mvery clear about that I always say in
the coaching process, life is achallenger in our favor. And when I
say a opponent in our favor,it is someone who is in front of
us who has no pity for life, does not pity us, does not

(09:05):
look at us with eyes of no. This one' s already tired,
poor thing, leave it alone,little Chinese tern, no, no,
no. Life is a contender thatis in our favor, but it continually
challenges us to the fullest, itbrings out the best of ourselves. Sometimes
this process of transformation makes us uncomfortable, frustrates us, annoys us, can

(09:30):
lead us to despair, to disappointment, even to the resignation of certain realities.
Then talking about dissatisfaction is going tohave different areas. Let' s
try to put our ideas on whatsatisfaction is a little in order. If
you like. Of course, Ithink the first most important question is that
there is behind a dissatisfied person.I don' t think I can relate

(09:58):
much. I think I share alittle bit about my experience and the lenses
I see this subject with. Ithink if there' s anything, there
' s a word I definitely don' t identify with and I hope I
never identify. It' s mediocre. Then it is very difficult, suddenly,

(10:18):
to have this balance between. Idon' t want to be mediocre,
but then I' m content,but then I don' t.
I can' t just stand stilland enjoy what I have. It'
s very difficult. I have abeginning in my manifesto. We talked about
that. I manifest the sheet thatI always write where who says I am

(10:39):
not. And there I have thisprinciple that gratitude does not justify your stagnation
being grateful for life or being gratefulto your parents. Either being grateful to
your family or to opportunities or toGod does not mean that because we are
thankful, then we already have theprivilege of stagnation, as I am no

(11:03):
longer obliged to grow, then wecan understand this. Andrea as the first
link of change. Let' stalk a little bit about change. This
thing you pose as satisfaction is becauseif I' m not dissatisfied, I
' m not going to change.Or how far satisfaction is and how far
the need for change is. Imean, let' s start at what

(11:24):
point is an engine and at whatpoint, on the contrary, it puts
a brake on you, it's a charge. Exactly. Let'
s start with understanding change, changeis going to be necessary. Let'
s start with this. I havethis idea that I always tell the people
I work with. Change is mandatory. It' s not optional. A

(11:46):
person can' t grab and sayone day you don' t know that
this is how far I' vecome. I will not change the moment
you stop changing in all areas ofyour life and stop evolving and developing or
progressing. And because this stagnation isgoing to come and the stagnation is going
to cause wear and tear. Wearingproduces frustration. Frustration can eventually become resignation

(12:07):
and sooner or later, what youcalled mediocrity, for it can even be
a waste of life. No,yes, I understand we have to change.
Now a lot of people are goingto say Leonardo in every area I
have to change. The answer isyes. I' m a promoter of
maximizing our life. When we talkabout productivity. On that occasion I told

(12:28):
you we are made to continually maximizelife. Nothing but maximizing life with order,
maximizing life with drowning kicks, likepushing life for all sides, but
trying to establish an order, aplanning. We have to plan how to
develop, how to progress, andthis change has to be an ideally inspiring

(12:50):
change, Jim Ronn said. Mymentors, there are two things that make
us change. Or the inspiration ofa guiding future or the despair of your
present Clearly. Clearly, inspiration isnot fought with satisfaction, I mean,
I can be satisfied, right now. Let' s talk about that and
anyway want this development and this progress, despair is not compatible with satisfaction.

(13:13):
I mean, if I' mdesperate. Obviously, I am not satisfied,
but many times it is also importantto understand this. Many times this
dissatisfaction is healthy. It seems tome that the second thing I want to
establish once we understand that change isan obligatory condition of progress, the second

(13:33):
thing we will have to put inorder when dissatisfaction can be something healthy and
when dissatisfaction can be something unhealthy,because it could not categorize you forever.
We never always have to be satisfied. We can never live the satisfaction.
It' s just not. Ithink so, and I think that sometimes
dissatisfaction is an element of conscience andresponsibility. When we realize and here comes

(13:54):
the interesting thing, when we realizethat we have not taken care of life
and of these responsibilities in a correctway. And then I can perfectly say
ah I' m dissatisfied with myperformance. I remember in a conversation we
had you told me that there wassomething a mindset that had been good lately,

(14:18):
it' s between us and weshouldn' t suffer to achieve things
and that I remember you telling mesomething about you being an enemy of that
mentality that, on the contrary,you have to learn to suffer. But
not a suffering of then from himI have not control of things and poor

(14:41):
of me, but of the car, not from self- pity, but
from him. When I want toachieve difficult things, I have to pay
prices and decide, pay the pricesuffering is a very complex word co n,

(15:01):
it translates, it says the samefor most people, but each person
puts a concept and a meaning differentfrom the word super. There' s
not gonna be people who' regonna suffer you, they' re gonna
say sorry for the optional suffering.It seems to me that we would have
to make a podcast on suffering,but let us establish this principle of progress.

(15:24):
It doesn' t have to beanything else when we say we pay
the price. There is no Cellimansets three standards of living and this is
going to be. This is goingto give us a line to what we
want to reach with dissatisfaction. Hesays that there is the life of pleasure,
a life full of stimuli. Thisthing that you said all the time,
the next car and the most moneyand the clothing brand and that if
the trip in first house. Andthat if this and, like all the

(15:46):
time, we have to have thislife of pleasure full of stimuli, when
human beings consider that happiness is basedon this life of pleasure, then we
have to continually be giving ourselves newelements satisfied desires to be able to experience
it. I do not say thatyes or that I am not trying anything

(16:07):
more to put a frame of referenceto a happiness limited to pleasure or when
it is happiness is all that wehave in our consciousness, for then I
have continually to have stimuli. Andhere comes the first level of dissatisfaction.
What I want to get to.It is dissatisfaction as a condition of unsatisfied
desires, that is, of uncompleteddesires, of unmet needs of desires that

(16:30):
do not have a satisfying element assuch. Then you need to continually feel
that life is super full of things, objects, ores so you can feel
that we are happy. It's a life that I always tell people

(16:52):
if that' s going to belife at some point you' re going
to run into that there won't be anyone else who' s going
to say they have everything in life. And yet I always say, well
objects. Maybe, but sometimes whatyou' re looking for as a wish
is a relationship with someone and asmuch money as you have, because that
relationship is sometimes not going to permeate, it' s not going to be

(17:15):
this bond that you' re lookingfor, it' s not going to
happen the love or affection you need. Then we will always be able to
say that when we live in alife of pleasure, we will find a
impotence in it, the impotence thatnot all desires will be satisfied. I
have sometimes said throughout my life thatdreams are possible. All dreams are possible,

(17:37):
all desires are possible. But underthe context of dreams that are really
real, that are connected to ouressence, not desires that we are simply
adding to our mind product of anenvironment, because the whole environment says we
have to have the next car orthe next trip or the next class,

(18:02):
the phone. Then we take itas our own. But deep down we
haven' t wondered and it's really my wish, it' s
really what I want. This bringsus to the first level of questions about
dissatisfaction. Many times we are dissatisfiedwith unmet desires, which are desires that

(18:25):
we have not even done the in- depth analysis of why and why we
want them. We' re hollowin desires. These are desires that I
say to you, desires acquired bybelonging, social desires. In my surroundings
they want it. So I,in this belonging, have to wish things

(18:47):
too. It doesn' t happenmuch to young people. Now they want
to have fun at a party andthen the group gets dressed in a certain
way and the individual begins to havethis desire for certain clothes, even if
it doesn' t go with hispersonality. But that' s how we
all dress. And in this socialdesire our mind, which is a social
organ, acquires it, adds itour life and then says that I need

(19:11):
desire this and then we are notcovered. But deep down they' re
wounds that aren' t real.Not these wounds that I have a feeling
of ah I need something. Idon' t have a vacuum. It
' s not real. It's not a real void. No,
but not that I' m goingto make you well honest when when you

(19:34):
can have that which you want,when you have the new cell phone,
you don' t have the tripand when you have friends feel very rich,
that is, if you feel asatisfaction to say what I had that,
I mean, I don' tknow if it has anything to do

(19:55):
with this, what you say aboutbelonging, but when you do have it
good, at least in my experience, it does feel that way. It
' s pleasant. I' min favour. Yours is nothing more than
how much you doubt that true pleasure, that is, what was the last
thing you acquired for this group desireof belonging and others that suddenly you say
I did not succeed and how longit lasted, how much I omit you,

(20:17):
because it is a plain That's what I mean by then what
if I said already, I haveit ah feels father, if you enjoy
it. It' s okay oneday, one week, okay, one
month, but there' s somethingelse coming right away. Now I want
what I do. Then all thetime, all the time. The problem,
Triep said. The problem is notin desires. The problem lies in

(20:41):
the depth of our Asses wishing isnot bad in some Eastern cultures. What
they are going to tell you isnot to live dissatisfaction, for I do
not long, I do not wish, I do not wish, I do
not want, I do not want, I do not want, I do
not want, that is, yourenounce desire and then the level of dissatisfaction
decreases radically. It' s myexact logic. It' s very logical.

(21:02):
So, if I don' twant to, then the void I
think I have, I don't have it. I think it'
s a route. The other routeyou might find is, then, to
desire things ever deeper. And thisbrings us to the second level of being
Liman when it says after the lifeof pleasure full life appears. And this
full life where we put a littlemore meaning into life, like I can

(21:23):
give up small cravings or small temporarypleasurable desires for things a little deeper,
more important, maybe for our life, where the object is not just to
satisfy our desires, but you startto say Hey, because I can give
up on this, but I wanta different lifestyle then I renounce comfort.

(21:48):
Maybe I' ll give up thisobject stimulus, buy something, go to
a party, but I' mstarting to generate a series of disciplines that
help me set you up differently.If you' ve just opened a topic
that in itself we could also doanother episode that has to do with the
resignation as well. I think itis quite linked to the issue of dissatisfaction,

(22:11):
because I think that if there issomething that I have experienced too much,
it is that before it seems tome that there was only one road
or a popular route. I usedto mean my parents, my grandparents,
where you were studying, I workedfifty years in a company, you got
married, you had kids, andyou had your life figured out. That

(22:33):
' s on the way. Todaythere are so many ways that people who
are my peers that I studied primary, high school, high school. Each
one is on roads and on routesso different that when you go choosing a
path you suddenly turn around and sayand if I had gone that way and

(22:53):
yes and if I go on theright and right path. It' s
something I was also telling you beforeI started the episode that I migrated to
another country. There is constantly thequestion of I will have done well and
if I return and if and isthis really what I want. I believe
that, at least in my experience, making a decision to see that there

(23:15):
are so many paths generates this senseof yes, of dissatisfaction, but of
constant questioning of what the other pathswill look like and the renunciation of those
paths. But this is this objectof full life You went to another country

(23:38):
and you' re trying to livea full life. You have this dialogue
I want a whole different life.You did a previous life project. If
you don' t get there,if you' re not reaching the life
you dreamed of, maybe you canhave this conversation. If I say ah

(23:59):
I feel dissatisfied, but we haveto understand this dissatisfaction is no longer based
on a desire. Or this isthe dissatisfaction of it when I call it
the satisfaction of your project, whenthe project you proposed you already had little
ones, let' s call themsacrifices. Some wishes. I missed them

(24:21):
Hey, I' m not gonnacover for you. It' s okay,
' cause I want something bigger.I' m leaving the temporal desires
because I' m looking for somethinga little longer. I don' t
want this life project and suddenly there' s a little dissatisfaction between the life
you have and the life project.Now let' s go categorizing this.
He hears if he has satisfaction,is correct or is incorrect, although here

(24:45):
he comes still to a deeper level. And satisfaction because you' re going
to say depends on whether you're enjoying or satisfied with the process of
achieving this project. It' sone thing. If you' re not
even enjoying the process, maybe you' ll say I' m dissatisfied with

(25:07):
my current reality, but my projectinspires me a lot and I' m
making progress. I do not havethe satisfaction of my immediate desires, but
the reward I will have in thelong term is much greater. He'
s gonna vandeer the penalty. ThenI' m satisfied. I' m
more satisfied with the life project thatI have to satisfy my temporal desires,

(25:30):
you can not spend something here becauseit' s going to save you for
something in the future. Then thereis a sense of dissatisfaction with desires,
but satisfaction with your project. Butif you reach the second level of life,
a full life and you have neitherthe satisfied desires, nor are you
satisfied with the project that you arebuilding, because what is going to start
to happen there is a bitterness anda tremendous frustration, because you will say

(25:52):
no more, I do not likemy present, I do not like neither
the direction that I have in life, I do not like nor the direction
that I am having in life.So this is going to become a real
internal battle. Right now, we' re going to get deeper into where
that battle happens, how strong.But if you manage to integrate and say
I' m comfortable, I'm happy with this projection of who I

(26:18):
' m going to make of howI' m going to live. Still,
you may have this third level ofsenima that says they call it life
for purpose. And I' mgoing to narrow the word down on purpose,
because they' re the most usedwords lately and very badly deduced.
But we try this life of contribution, where nothing else we are living to

(26:41):
satisfy ourselves if we are not livingto contribute. And this is very important,
because every standard of living is goingto involve a personal sacrifice. The
first transition from pleasure life to fulllife implies the sacrifice of the immediate desires
of these things and these stimuli thatyou and I have spoken of. But
when you pass from full life,a life with contribution, with purpose,

(27:04):
with meaning, what we are sometimessacrificing is even the satisfaction of our own
life project to become some people whosay you know what I renounce to my
project in order to contribute more tothis that I wanted in project. I
cannot put aside, because my responsibilityfor contribution is much more important than feeling

(27:26):
full in a personal sphere. Irenounce this one we will call egocentrism,
not selfishness, but egocentrism to makeothers, all, us at the center.
Then I am willing to release thingsthat seem to me to be very

(27:47):
important, but I will be muchmore satisfied and full if we all receive
partially the project hears. You cangive us an example of that, because
I imagine things, but I'm not sure. Yeah, yeah,
I' m right, so let' s imagine that this suddenly gives fathers

(28:07):
and mothers a lot of time tohave this family project. From ah I
' m going to be a family, I' m going to work here
and I' m going to workhere and suddenly one day they have children
and older children have a chance.So maybe we have to move out of
town so that the child has ajob study opportunity and the parents have to

(28:29):
sacrifice maybe our relationship, our brotherproject. Either I' ve taken care
of our parents, or the careercourse I wanted to live because I care
more. I can give that upfor you for this one. I don
' t like to call sacrifice,but this surrender of my project for a

(28:52):
common good, not with the facesof telling him I left everything for you,
but with the desire to say.I prefer that my contribution to IT
be ahead, which is just feelinggood. On the other hand, you
can bring it to an extreme greatercontribution. You can say that when,
when our social responsibility is more important, the people who take not their personal

(29:19):
project is to be an entrepreneur,to be successful, to have multi-
money and such a deal, butsuddenly say hey. We' re going
to make a social contribution, we' re going to make a water share
in our lives and we' regoing to dedicate ourselves no longer to enrich
ourselves, but we' re goingto do a project that distributes different week
resources. Where I contribute to asociety, I contribute to a group,

(29:40):
where I discipline a group of people. That' s also a purposeful life.
You make me think of all thesefigures that constantly, because we thought
when we thought of inspiration marti blutherKing, the Teresa mother, that,
perhaps they were not living in aworld or pleasure or probably not what they

(30:03):
wanted to do of their lives.However, they renounce that for a greater
cause than they do. Not sure, it' s just a good example
of that. So when you callme Leonard, let' s talk about
dissatisfaction. There is the dissatisfaction ofdesires. This time it is the dissatisfaction
of life with project. Sometimes wecan have dissatisfaction with whether or not we

(30:23):
can contribute. These may have adice say hey, but it' s
good or it' s bad.Depends on where you are, it depends
on what your category of life is, what it should be doing to a
person who listens to us today.Well, you' d have to ask
yourself first, place yourself on thehorizontal line where you are. I'
m living by pleasures and stimuli.Nothing more. What worries me most about

(30:45):
having things clothes car, houses,success, achievements recognition. I' m
on a real life project, Imean I' m aware that I have
a life where I have a projectof growth, of progress, where I
involve or family systems, affective systemsto more people and I' m trying

(31:06):
to get a call, a mission, or we' re in a life
of contribution, where it' sreally not about me anymore. It is
that the suffering of others, thepain of others, the shortcomings of others
are what I need to devote myselfto meeting and not precisely my own needs.
Understanding this map to know if we' re in each of these lives.
Now we can ask ourselves. Hey, and I' m satisfied with

(31:30):
what I got. No, okayso I' m satisfied maybe with the
life project I have, I'm satisfied with what I' m contributing.
But if I am not satisfied withwhat I am contributing, I am
not satisfied with my project and Iam not satisfied with what I have at
the moment, with the stimuli thatare covering my desires and needs. So,

(31:51):
I definitely have a problem that isno longer constituted in my environment,
but is inherent in my person andthat' s where something a little more
complicated comes from. Now I wantto explain this to you. We'
re all there sometime. The pointis, it' s not a living
condition. Most people who are ina condition of life who are dissatisfied with

(32:12):
everything, are going to experience adepression or are going to live a moment
of tremendous frustration and are very notorious. The complicated thing for people like you
and like me is to find thesemoments where not eight satisfied with what I
contribute, not satisfied with my project, I am not satisfied with what I
have in small moments in that morning, where I am screwed up by everything
you know and the people who arewell- rounded ask me well and what

(32:36):
you have Today I got up withthe pizquier Today he hears like I am
not aligned with anything those little momentswhere nothing satisfies us. Now the question
is where those moments are born.Well, here' s a second level.
We had already spoken of unfulfilled desires. Now let' s talk about
those unhealed emotional wounds. Many times, our inability to enjoy how little we

(33:00):
have, as well as to convincethis dialogue with you, has nothing to
do with our reality. It hasmore to do with these wounds of our
lives. I don' t evenwant to call it childhood, because sometimes
it can be an heir of adolescenceor age, these wounds of our life
that we suddenly have in bloom ofskin and then comes something that just doesn

(33:22):
' t correspond to a healing huntand activates us all this pain of life
and suddenly it' s like aninternal explosion to say wait. This hurts.
It' s not that the environmentis wrong, it' s not
that they' ve told us something, they' ve taken something away from
us, it' s an internalcondition of something unhealed. I think that
all human beings, Andrea, havemany things to heal and sometimes these moments

(33:49):
of dissatisfaction of everything are elements thatare super valuable to be aware that there
are things that we haven' tyet worked internally and that it is vital
that we get responsible to heal,because if it isn' t as if
we were already with the completed life. And I love what I told you

(34:12):
about life, which is this opponentin our favor, because it will place
us in those circumstances in a cyclicalway in order to be able to find
all the time what is the nextlink to heal inside me and that is
but yes, in a cyclical way. I mean, it' s awesome

(34:34):
and you say it and I getit like then definitely. Yes, he
' s a opponent, because Ican turn to see parts of my life
where I say again and again thesame opponents. It presents me in different
ways, in different situations, withdifferent faces, but the same thing,
the same challenge over and over againtotally and there are going to be people
who are going to have these detonatorsof dissatisfaction who are sometimes going to do

(35:00):
things or the absence of things,the lack of things, sometimes they are
going to be people like today Ihave a satisfied person. I got another
couple came up with the same thing? Do I have another couple made it
to the same point? Or thatthey continually have the same element or satisfaction.
When I' m going to seesomeone dad six months ago and I
can' t believe he told methis again and I got angry again and

(35:20):
it happened the same thing that alwayshappens. Not those elements of repetition,
because we have to do an actof conscience, to say hey, there
is something you have to work on. There' s one point we haven
' t healed yet. And that' s when I tell you that dissatisfaction
has its elements of nothing else.It is a question of making us satisfied,

(35:42):
of making us satisfied, but ofcompleting this internal condition, because these
wounds. Someone is going to sayyou have to heal them, but deep
down, it' s the pointthat I care most about coming with you,
Andrea, it' s dissatisfaction,this is called the impediment of identity
when I can' t be whoI really am. It is one thing

(36:05):
to have the satisfaction of desires,not covered external things. It' s
one thing to not be satisfied withthe life project. It is one thing
to not be satisfied with what Icontribute. But another thing deep in human
beings is when I' m notsatisfied with who I' m being,

(36:28):
I' m not getting to bewho essences today, so we feel oppressed,
contained, limited, tied up,as if we had these in the
morning. I was told a veryimportant word that was like shackles that have
me enslaved to a certain personality,to a certain routine of life and you

(36:52):
want to have this freedom to sayhey, but I want to be.
It seems to me that that isthe main source of this dissatisfaction that you
refer to when sometimes the question whatmakes us have a morning of satisfaction,
which makes us not feel grateful forwhat we have. That' s when
we have this identity impediment. Now, the impediment of identity implies, then,

(37:16):
to begin with, knowing who Iam. Sometimes Andrea must happen to
you. We' re confused aboutwhat I want, because deep down we
' re confused about who we are. There' s a part of us.
You didn' t change environments,you went from one country to another.

(37:38):
So, when you change the country, things that Andrea was before are
no longer things that she wasn't before now is then there' s
a feeling like ambiguity between who Ireally am and what I' m going

(37:58):
to decide that has more weight.Yeah, I mean, I think that
' s like the most difficult decisiontotally if we don' t know who
we are, we' re hardlygonna know what we want. Very complicated
when we are not satisfied with whowe are. And I tie this down

(38:22):
to this one I enjoy my identity. I' m really connected to my
essence. I' m really connectedto what I believe, to my convictions.
I have clarity even of convictions.I' m making an effort.
It seems to me that it isintentional enough with the people I work with

(38:42):
to make clear what convictions you havein your life, because it seems obvious
the question. But truly, whenyou tell them, write to me the
convictions of your life, what arethose things you would defend by cloak and
sword the principles of life you say. That' s the way life is.

(39:04):
We don' t have such concerts, we don' t have them
that clear. And then suddenly it' s like someone' s going into
the fight with all their might andsuddenly asking someone what we' re defending.
I don' t know, butI' m giving it all away,

(39:25):
but what you' re defending,what is this fight you' re
fighting for so eagerly, what isthis object of your effort, where all
this encouragement and all this bravado isdirected toward life. You don' t
say it and I visualize it asbecause when you said a fight, I

(39:47):
said good. Rather, it seemsto me sometimes that dissatisfaction feels like a
lack of energy. But now thatyou explain it a little bit more,
I mean that, of course,everything weighs you down and it seems like
you' re wasting too much energyand you have no energy left in doing

(40:09):
worldly activities and there are times thatyou just turn around and say well if
I have apparently everything, I havehealth, I have family, I have
a job, I have many thingsthat I would like. Why am I
not shining, I have an auraof happiness and what is wrong with me.

(40:30):
No, and the answer is ohno, I know you' re
not enjoying who' s doing it. OK, there' s a Rogers

(40:50):
saying that there' s a measureof human beings, that we' re
always measuring human potential, we're always on this question of being better,
exactly, and that' s myevery day, this hearing question.
If I did this, could Ibe better? And if I were with

(41:13):
someone else, would I be better? And if I was in another job,
would I be better? And ifI lived somewhere else, would it
be better? And if I dedicatedmyself to another passion, would I be
better? And if I ate different, would it be better? And if
I was there, it could beanything subtle like gymnasium, deep things of
purpose, passion. Even so we' re measuring this potential. This dissatisfaction

(41:36):
occurs my jalis cendejalia and establishes inthe flow a thousand nine hundred sixty-
nine, when it establishes what wasthe condition of the fall, it establishes
this idea of where we forget ourselves. We' re just flowing. We
' re flowing, we' rein a space of dissatisfaction when we couldn
' t flow anymore. When somethingsays hears, but it' s that

(42:00):
I want to flow and something seemslike this thing that we said holds me
down slows down. It doesn't let me do who I am anymore
I' m not living my potentialto the fullest. I am not feeling
this encouragement of life as I wishand then suddenly I do what I have
to do in life. But thereare no more stimuli. And I don
' t mean the stimuli of desiresearlier. I mean the stimuli that appear

(42:21):
when a person has the right motiveto do what is and do what is
doing the lack of fundamental motives thatdrive us these impulses of life. Victor
Frank said that he called it freedomof sense. What' s the point

(42:43):
of everything you' re doing ifyou don' t find a sense anymore,
a real motive of value that saysthis that I' m doing is
worth because until quite a while thenit becomes a routine and this routine isn
' t who I am anymore,it' s just an automatic and when

(43:07):
we' re in the automatic world, no one can feel satisfaction. Now
I' m going to put youon a next level ok is that there
is contentment satisfaction and there is happinesssatisfaction. Let' s use these two
words that I know are going tobe controversial, but let me explain them
before the one that starts everybody saysoh these contentments and your happiness. I
' m gonna put it in context. Satisfaction is this ability or human ability

(43:31):
to be content with what I havehad and I have achieved in life that
you suddenly turn around what you said. Listen, I must be happy with
the health I have, I havea home, I have clothes, I
have that ta ta ta, ohyeah, I' m happy, but
I feel like there' s anotherpart I' m not getting. This
one. We will call for thesatisfaction of happiness, and happiness has to

(43:52):
do with this direction of the future. They' re not the same.
Someone can have contentment and not behappy, not have a stimulating future,
or have this independently if he isin full life or in life with purpose
and meaning. Suddenly he turns aroundand says it' s not that what

(44:15):
I see in the future isn't bringing me what' s needed,
it' s not challenging me togive my best. I don' t
feel connected to that. I don' t feel like it' s my
irresponsibility to achieve this. And then, when you asked at first this social
condition, where the greatest of humanbeings are already dissatisfied, it seems to

(44:37):
me that the point You could leadto this many times after all that explained,
you could say there are people whoare not happy and most human beings
today, Andrea don' t evenknow how to be happy. Happiness is
something you have to learn, it' s not something natulum. We are

(45:00):
not born with the capacity of happiness, because we are not even born with
the ability to glimpse a real future. It' s a skill we all
have to develop. And by thisI am not referring to the planning of
life alone, but to the abilityto stimulate the faith that we call it,

(45:21):
the faith of the chosen future orwhat we call hope. Hope is
when the promise of the future isso enriching, so enriching. We'
re willing to walk in that direction, so you can turn around. And
if one of my mentors at somepoint, when I was asking him how

(45:43):
you are, no, and Iknew we were in a difficult time of
life, and he was telling meI' m wrong. But I'
m doing fine, and then therewas a tremi smile like saying,"
I mean, this present is aroundhere, I' m in the eye
of the hurricane, but that's where I should be now. But
I' m going well, youknow I know I' m going to

(46:08):
get you this video destination if wecould think about it and we could check
it out, that is, checkus out You and I right now,
Andrea and we' ll say heyyou have clarity of destiny. Not with
fate, with this subject where yourlife is going to end. No.
I' m not referring to thisfate as this project you' re building?
Now that you' ve gone,where is it going to go or

(46:30):
what do you really want to accomplishor what does it connect you to what
you' re building? I havea friend to serve as a jos trip.
You asked him what your old man' s purpose is. That'
s what I' m looking atas ok and what you mean by me,
because it seems to me that everytrip is a small moment that sums
up life, you get out ofwhere you are. You' re going
to go to a new place,you' re going to have adventures,

(46:52):
meet people, you' re goingto meet topics you don' t know,
with themes you enjoy, topics youdon' t dispute. Ta ta
tatar crashes and in one day youmight come back. But it' s
like a little capsule of life andthen how what purpose this little capsule has
if you know how to live thislittle trip and then, maybe every time
we can learn to live better,be happy, to involve with the right

(47:15):
wisdom, tasting life is we haveto learn, learn, make happy.
So here comes the practical stuff.Hey, Leonardo, let' s get
the full map. I' mnot in the basic life of pleasure.
At what time I pass into lifeof fullness when I have this project instead

(47:38):
of stimulating pleasures. Well, that' s a question that has to correspond
to maturity. Ok maturity is whatbrings us from pleasure life to full life.
Just part of maturity is to measurerisks, to stay as we are,
to be able to sacrifice certain immediatethings for the long term, to

(48:00):
give depth to our desires, totake responsibility for things that are not there
then someone would have to do thisanalysis of saying, okay, I want
to mature. Yes, what animportant question is question number one, which
we never ask ourselves. Yeah,and just because of what you were saying,

(48:21):
a while ago. To grow upinvolves a certain degree of pain and
we have to be willing to gothrough pain, a small moment of pain,
of this immediate sacrifice for a projectand value things and prioritize things in
a different way. If someone sayslisten Leonardo, but he' s going

(48:45):
to move me, I' mmoved by dissatisfaction, because maybe it'
s how I do it to besatisfied. I find a project sufficiently stimulating.
I find a sufficiently stimulating project thatinspires you in what, because not

(49:06):
based on your past pain of yourwounds that I spoke about earlier, but
based on who wants to be abasic question, not even what you want
to dedicate yourself how you would liketo experience you I want to be more
cheerful, I want to be moreoutgoing, I want to be deeper,

(49:28):
I want to be more creative,I want to do whatever you want.
About that design your project if you' re already at that level of project
and you' ve been scratching yourselfwith a little dissatisfaction, because maybe what
you' re feeling is that yourpotential is already arming me, because I
cut it. Ah it is alreadythe impact more established on the fourth level
of the pyramid was important and thelast was autorialization, and authorization always stipulated

(49:52):
it. What I want to contributeto, what a problem that is not
mine I feel responsible for solving.Maybe I have a job, maybe,
and I have food. Maybe Ihave faith Maybe I have friends. Maybe
I' m in health. Okaywhat people are all around me, what

(50:14):
they lack, what absence they have, what trouble they have, what I
' m going to have that Iwant to take this responsibility of helping them
out for the best. It's not my case, but maybe I
' ve already moved on. I' ve already worked them out and now
I feel empathically identified with them sayingI help you. And this is what
we said earlier, not out ofpity, not to help them because they

(50:35):
were bad they need me, butbecause I need to grow up. You
can' t see certain situations happen. I don' t mean, I
think also through the question like what? What makes you the most angry what
situations. Well, I' velearned a lot from that not so much

(50:58):
as then what I bring to thetable. And, for example, I
think that one thing that is completelyintolerable to me is the abuse of power.
But it makes me, it drivesme, it drives me crazy,
I mean, I totally freak outand I can break and destroy. I
mean, I think I get apower, just like Hulk, and I

(51:20):
think it' s something that Ijust can' t like turning a blind
eye to. When I see somethinglike that, then I think I mean,
I' ve always seen that partof me, but curiously I don
' t know if I' mliving a life as a purpose, focused

(51:43):
on that not not to destroy injustice, but on the other side of the
coin, the light part of thatas a shadow environment, of course dedicate
my power, my strength to thatcause. Not only does that cause become
an important enough motive for your lifeto be spent all your resources on it.

(52:09):
OK, well, thanks for Leonardatherapy, we' re not always
ready for that transition. OK.Sometimes we can say ah I disagree,
but we' re not doing anything. Sometimes what people do most is a
march to say publicly I disagree,but daily life does not have this real

(52:36):
transition of contribution seriously in the dayto day. The most important question,
Andrea, seems to me of allthis that we have talked about is that
we are all going to go throughdissatisfactions on different levels we can all base

(53:00):
on dissatisfaction and take turning it intosomething perhaps negative towards something positive, as
long as this dissatisfaction triggers progress orreach the next level of our life,
both in these dimensions of life thatI planted with you and in this dimension
of healing me more and more,even satisfying certain desires, but above all

(53:22):
in allowing me to break my ownparadigms of personality and grow internally to make
someone different. If dissatisfaction detonates thisprogress, it seems to me that dissatisfaction
then becomes an important element in ourlife. Not to say I would never
have to feel satisfied, but whatI have to do when I am dissatisfied.
How I take this element and takeit as a seed of transformation and

(53:46):
I also believe that there is autopia in this continuously satisfied life as everything
is always satisfied. I don't think so. It seems that when
people ask me, they hear contentmentcan be permanent. Yes, yes,

(54:07):
because contentment and gratitude go hand inhand. Thank you nothing more, it
is for causes those things that wehave. We can also thank the things
that are uncomfortable, the things thatmake us hurt, the things that take
away our losses and be grateful forthat process that is going to invite us
to change if we understand the sequenceof the cause and what is going to

(54:30):
be the consequence of transformation that weare going to have. But above all,
this question you were telling me aboutopening up in dissatisfaction is like realizing
how much ignorance we have in beinghappy. Happiness is one thing that everyone
is told what you come to lifefor. Being happy I always tell you

(54:51):
that answer is very good. Nothingelse is contained with real knowledge, because
being happy is nothing more. It' s like feeling like I have everything
I want all the time. Behappy. It will involve being continually in
this challenge of life in which wehave spoken and sometimes knowing how to lose,
sometimes knowing how to win and beingcontinuously in a process of transformation.

(55:15):
It' s going to involve anextreme degree of intelligence. Will it involve
knowing how to solve external problems?It will involve knowing how to solve internal
problems, involving the management of theright emotions. Hey and Juan I'
m angry, how good and whatare you going to do with that anger

(55:36):
Hey, when you gave it,what are you going to do with that
sadness? It' s going tomean increasing our degree of responsibility. So
here comes something very interesting to completethe talk. When we are dissatisfied,
I almost guarantee you that there isan area of our life in which we

(55:57):
are not being responsible and we aretrying to receive something that does not correspond.
Who we are they call the lawof correspondence. Wow, it'
s gonna do you again. Whenwe feel dissatisfaction, it is usually because

(56:21):
we are not being responsible in anarea of our life, then we are
trying to receive something that we arenot receiving, obviously, and that is
why we are dissatisfied. But we' re not getting it. Because it
doesn' t correspond what we wantto receive with the person that we are

(56:43):
what barbarity and then it would seemthat life is unfair as ah but it
is that I have done this,is that I have done that and it
can' t be and I shouldhave had a partner and I should have
had that job and a midi shouldhave recognized my tual boss, because he
does or she does and I don' t. And if we do a
deep analysis, he' s assuredyou, Andria, that you and I

(57:07):
and everyone are going to find anarea where we' re going to say
hey he hasn' t received itbecause he' s not being responsible for
this. Then you want a reward, a credit for irresponsibility. And that
' s not life. It's Wau Nconte, in our favor,

(57:30):
a contender in our favor. Ilove Leonardo, because what an incredible phrase
to close I thank you very muchfor your time. As always, anyone
else who would have invited to talkabout dissatisfaction would have given us one,
tip, two, tip three.But I love that you took us a

(57:52):
lot deeper into understanding, thinking,and besides, I' m telling you
this episode. I, being thehost, do feel like someone else,
yes, I feel inspired. Thankyou very much, really thanks to you
Andrea. Really. I wish thatwhat can happen when I listen to this

(58:13):
podcast, that would be my longingfor the people who listened to you.
First, I do a review ofwhere he is. Second, realize that
you always have things to thank,develop the habit of contentment. Three,
increase your responsibility and say some thingsI haven' t done. I have
to grow up and if we allmove on, Andrea. If we all

(58:36):
advance from the life of pleasure,the full life, the full life,
the life with purpose, being responsible, healing ourselves internally, being who we
are, there is a certainty.And the certainty is that satisfaction is spread
and dissatisfaction is spread We are moreinfected with dissatisfaction than with satisfaction, unfortunately,

(58:57):
because we are confused, very confusedin who we are and how much
we are worth. So satisfaction isalso a result of true completeness of our
identity, the understanding of our identity. And then, when you say I,
I know I' m worth it. I understand that you are worth
and this fosters the best relationships.So it' s my pleasure. Te

(59:22):
Wow, thank you very much,Leonardo. And then you' re listening
to it during this talk. Atsome point you really said this is bringing
me a lot. I wish mycousin or my brother, my mom,
my girlfriend or my girlfriend could enrichhim. I also invite you at this
time to pick up the share buttonand send them to them and we will

(59:44):
leave all the data of Leonardo Asennatoin the description, if you want to
know a little more about it.All of you. I thank you very
much also Leonardo and remind yourselves ofthe impact you want to see in the
world until the next Milky Way.Average