Male Loneliness

James comments on male loneliness.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
So I'm not presentable at this moment, but I want
to get this thought out and I thought, I want
to make this a podcast episode of sorts, and yeah,
so that's how I wanted. I want to get this out.
So this is not scripted or I mean, like super producer,

(00:22):
and it's just some thought. I just saw a video
that I thought was really good and I kind of
want to tell you about it. And it's by guy
Goes under the name Darren Darren Darren. It's like D
A R. E and the Air. It's it's just it's
I'll trying to put a description about male loneliness. Its

(00:43):
thirteen minutes long short he posted it. It's so good
because there's this So there's this whole talk about male loneliness,
and I've seen people shrug it off like oh yeah,
what a who cares blah blah, And I feel like,

(01:05):
because it's men, both men and women just like basically
say like walking off, Like what do you doing? Just
walk it off? And it's like it's in because a
lot of crimes out there are happening, and people doing
things and appropriately because they're lonely. I don't I don't

(01:28):
condone any of that, but I feel like there is
something happening that happens since the dawn of social media
and then totally during the pandemic and the lockdowns where
people have lost their social skills, and this film actually
touches on that. And I think it's real calling somebody

(01:56):
when you feel down. I'm you know, I'm an I
talk for a living. I'm just learning how to do that.
I'm just learning how to reach out to somebody when
I'm feeling low. So I can only imagine if you
can't get to that point where you're socially stunted or

(02:20):
really scared or nervous to reach out, because not all
of your friends either are family members put out welcoming
energy to that either. So it is creating a lot
of I know these words in cells and there's all
these are words they use. Yes, I mean, you know, guys,
how do I talk to a girl? I really do

(02:40):
you think this? Probably give me an don and give
me in trouble are But I just feel like there
are some things that are true and that people are
socially stunted and emotionally stuck. And we have a lot
of man babies out there for better or worse, who
just don't know how to navigate through the basics of life.

(03:06):
So what do you do with that? You know? And
it's and it is film particular films or film. He
always a solution. You watch the NLSI solution and I'm thinking, yeah,
for some people, I could work, they can get the
courage to do the solution he's talking about. But it's
not that easy. And I just know that society doesn't

(03:30):
support men having issues. I'm seeing more and more men say, Okay,
we got pulled together. We gotta talk, you gotta do this.
So I have some people I follow who I love
what they're doing for men. And I say, I'm saying

(03:50):
men because I know I just talked to about else.
To you, men and women are different. Give me some similarities.
Obviously certain things because we human have certain things that
are in common. But men and women were wired differently,
we think differently, we're taught differently. And in front of

(04:13):
my rob Pard he goes, you know, he was watching
somebody in front of his talking. He said, well, men
who have no fathers and I raised my single mothers
reacted in feminine ways or something. I don't I don't
believe that's that at all. But I know what the base,
I know the basics of what of what he could

(04:35):
be getting at. And that is and I've already said this, daughters,
do you need mothers? They all see fathers but for
a different reason. Sons need fathers, but you also need
mothers for a different reason. It's like it's as you
can't provide that. I always say, because those you just

(04:58):
just kept write them, find someone in your village, your
circle that can still fulfill a role. I think all
kids should have the spectrum. My kids were raised with gay,
straight by tribe, fly whatever, older, younger, different races, and

(05:20):
I feel like both my daughters are very well adjusted
in terms of social skills and social acceptance and knowledge.
So I'm saying that it's almost like for me with
my one daughter, we uh traveled a lot with her,

(05:44):
and I really made I made sure I made an
effort just too. We took every where we me and
her mother's where we went, probably out of necessity, but
just kind of like she was easy to pack up
and move around. I think because we started so young
late it came to sleepovers, when it came to trips,
when they came to the car rides. She was way

(06:06):
easier to handle and to the stage like traveling. So
it's I think. I think when you start really young
and give them variety, that is a spice of life,
that is the key to life. That's all it's. I
think it's all there. If you could everything, if it's
not a natural if it's not I don't say natural,
but if it's not a situation where like I said,

(06:27):
if it's two guys two dance, do you have any
strong females in your life? Have them involved? If you're
two white parents or your adopt a black child, do
you have any strong black figures around? There is a
section people will tell you that's not important, and when

(06:48):
you talk about I disagree completely. I think it's important
and not the way of all black fooks are like
or all Latinos are like, or always like. It's just
more of at least they see someone, it just kind
of looks like though at the very least it looks
or there's there's I mean, there's just something about that,

(07:11):
because believe it or not, the world is not utopia.
But also there are rich cultures like why not why
can't everybody partake? Whether you're you know, if you are
to say you're a transracial adoption, to make great cultures

(07:32):
out there, share them all, share the ones you can.
You don't have them have Mexican food and Filipino food
and Italian. Feel like, expose them to all of it.
And if one of their biological backgrounds is Italian, they've
had it now or Chinese, they've had it now. You know,
it's like kind of just showcase it. I say, showcase

(07:55):
everything and everyone benefits and not like I just I
agree with that. But I think with men, i'd like
to I was always searching for a male figure. If
I'm gonna be totally honest, because my father wasn't the greatest.
After a while, I had a stepfather, but he had
last long, and I know my uncles were part of
my life. So I'm like, I always always try to

(08:16):
find a male figure to help me. It's just natural.
It's just totally natural. Oh anyway, So that's just some
random thoughts. I was thinking about that. And this video
is just so good. I'll trying to put the description
in there so you can go to it and watch yourself.
But I think male loneliness is real and it can't
be kind of detrimental and dangerous to our society. On

(08:38):
some level, we's got to encourage men to talk more
and to learn how to socialize more in very positive ways.
James and Junior, I'll talk to you next time.