November 24, 2022 • 30 mins
Interview with Lanna Chairez
Ig @lannachairezcomedy
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/off-set-with-jahan-x--3123861/support.
Ig @lannachairezcomedy
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/off-set-with-jahan-x--3123861/support.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Yo, yo, yo yo. Happy Thanksgiving to everybody out there,
thanks to tuning in to fuck it and start about
with your high X very cool, simple, smooth episode I
got here. I hope everybody's having a good day for
the holidays. Make sure y'all drink slipping on a little vodka.
Doing this the night of or the night before Thanksgiving.
(00:23):
Maybe if I'm not too fucking tipsy at MIT, I
might put this bitch out tonight. But yeah, make sure
you have a good time. Man, be safe out there.
Uh this one. I got a cool little interview with
someone's special. She's gonna introduce herself out here. She's hilarious.
I mean, I don't know women. There's not that many
women that are like her. She's she's funny, she got
(00:46):
a different look on life. She's the type of woman
that some guys. I feel like most guys can have
no woman like her because she's too honest and too
real and shit. But she's hilarious. She makes she she
puts like sexual things or she made like a sexual
top into some comedy like she she hella funny. I
(01:07):
fuck with her tough. We got a funny story too.
When I did a photo shoot for her, It's hello funny,
but yeah, thank you all for tuning to fucking le's
talk about with Johann X. I've been smoking all day too,
I've been like super high. So yeah, make sure y'all
hit the subscribe button the like, follow me on Instagram
the real johann X, and yeah, let's get into it.
(01:28):
Happy holidays. Did you when we share we're live now
this is part of the podcast. I leave shit in
here like this, but yeah, so we start off like this.
I want you to introduce yourself. Let my listeners know
who you are and what you got going on.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Motherfucking terries.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
I am the world's sexiest comedian, a live kind of.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I'm funny as fun though, but that's me. I'm Lanaitaries.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
You guys can follow me at Lana Charry's Comedy on
all platforms.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
There it is, there, it is. And like most people
don't listen to my podcast, they know that I really
don't have no structure and ship when I'm doing this,
but talking with like really talking with you, I'm like,
I don't need to I don't need to sell nothing.
I don't need to come up with no magic plan,
Like I just let you be you and it's that
shit's amazing.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Reason at anything, I would like, I will talk about anything.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
I'm open to anything.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
So I always tell like a funny story on here
and shit, so like to give people an idea of
like I mean, this ain't who you are, but like
to let people know how we meant and shit, we
was gonna do the I was gonna do a photo
shoot for you because I was like, you know, I'm
trying to get to like start doing photo shoots and
start doing my own work like that and planned out
(02:51):
everything was perfect, cool, there's some some shrooms got involved,
even like model that shows up with shrews and the thing.
Speaker 4 (03:03):
You just you just have them on deck. I'm like, yeah,
want something.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And the thing about me too is like when I
be doing shit like that, like I always try to
be like really professional, not like I'm uptight, not like
I try to be uptight and shit, but like I
try to be professional. But I'm like, you know what
if you offering him, yeah, what's up? And then that
shit just had me like oh and I'm like god,
then I start thinking, I'm like damn, I be an unprofessional?
How my acting.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Like it was so much fun you know what the
I want to tell this story real fast. I remember
you followed me on Instagram, and I have followed.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
You back just because I thought your page was cool.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I was like, oh, you know, he's like like he's cute.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
I follow him back click until one time I was
alone at home kind of feeling a little frisky, and
I go and I'm on you porn and then I'm
just scrolling, scrolling, and I'm like John. I was like,
there's only one person in the entire world that I
know that has that name. And me and him had
been like texting back and forth on on like.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
DM's just chill shit too.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
It wasn't like nothing crazy, but like you we were
just dming and then and then I was like, bro,
that's the homies we weed.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
Oh my god, that's the homies we we bro.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
I sawed and then I texted him on the DMS
and I was like, bro, I just saw your dance.
And then I remember one of my friends was like, bro,
I would have clicked off so quick, and I was like,
clicked off fu that Like I.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Was over there like get that ship, like freaking backs
and ship.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Oh yeah, that's all funny because I get that. You're
a lot like some of my homies.
Speaker 3 (04:42):
Never known it, like literally because we have been texted
with dming for like a cool minute and it wasn't
nothing like that, Like it wasn't.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Like it wasn't no flirty ship. It was just like
we were just mad cool with you.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, none nothing yeah, like yeah, it was.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Nothing disrespectful, nothing weird.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
And I was like, oh my.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
God, like I know that, homie.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
That's great. I'm telling you. I got like friends that
be hitting me up and they be somebody. They be
on there and ship trying to get off and then
like he's like, yeah, I ain't be looking in the
category of your ship and then your ship just pop
up and I'm like, man, I'm done for the day.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
That's fucked up.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
That would that would make me dry up.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Too, Like like if I had a dick, I'd go
lift like like I know you, I play ball with you.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
It's different like you like I always always talk about it.
I'm like, niggas be watching ship and you see it.
You see a regular time you go see a dick
while you're watch it, no matter what. But since it's
someone you know now is like so okay, what the
fuck Like no, it's it's different from me now.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
It's so different when you know the person you're like,
am I supposed to be like like he's doing it right?
But like should I be watching? Like you know, like
I like that scene's cool. I'm like with the bathtub
like that's dope. But am I supposed to be? Well,
like this is weird now?
Speaker 1 (06:08):
So I got fund is that like they we're saying
ship Like, man, if we was having like a three
summer we have some chick were about to run or
something like I don't know if I were, I want
to do it because you're gonna whip out, you get
you a porn star, you know how to do what
you're doing or whatever. And I'm just sitting here like, man,
I can't have fucking fun with the homies no more.
Speaker 4 (06:25):
I was like, you know what you do three with
another dude?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Would you would? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (06:32):
You just don't make eye contact.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
There's when it when it comes to you like that,
it's like, uh, guys got unwritten rolls and codes, like
especially when I was in high school and college and
all that ship like when that ship just happens, it happens.
But you know some and some niggas be when they
tag a team and they be making eye contact and
saying what's up, stabbing up and clapping hands and ship.
(06:57):
See that's the thing though with me, Like when it
comes like that. When I was young and I was
doing it, it's like I call it like running train
and ship. But now that I'm older, it's it's a threesome.
You know, like if if me and me and a
guy got a chick, Yeah, we're gonna make sure she
get her her best time, playable and all that. But
it's not like, oh, we ran training, like oh no,
just a three something, you know. It's like a little
(07:19):
I guess since I'm older now, I look at it
a little different, like.
Speaker 4 (07:23):
There's a switch off.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
I've never had that.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
I've never had.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Sex with two dudes at the same time. It's just
I just made a post about this, and I swear
on God because this is really how I think if
I if I was gonna have.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
A threesome with two dudes, it wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Work out because I'm like, Okay, I want y'all to
touch dicks. You guys, you can't have two dicks out
and not play with them. Not playing with each other too,
So I'm like, nah, I need I need you guys to.
Speaker 4 (07:50):
Like touch tips just a little bit and make them.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Out a little bit.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I would ruin it.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Is that just the Is that just the comedy answer?
Is that the real true answer.
Speaker 4 (08:02):
I'm totally honest.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
I cannot have sex with two dudes at the same time,
two girls.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Thousand percent a dude.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
And a girl.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
But they say most women, They say most women, that's
like the fantasy would be to have two guys because
like another girl there girls be jealous and shit like that.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
No, I'm I'm by I'm hear me out though, when
it comes to threesomes, because I'm I'm like a I'm
usually a third I like, I like fucking couples, but
when it comes to fucking couples, you the girl always
got to pay attention to the girl.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
That's just that's that's unwritten rule.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
If anyone wants to have sex with a couple, just
pay attention to the girl, unless the girl says otherwise.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's just hands down, you compliment the bitch.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
I walk in, girl, you got nice hair, look at you,
your boots look so cute, and you flirting with the girl.
The dude ain't gonna say shit, the dude loves it.
You're you're flirting with his girl. And if I'm flirting
with the girl now she feels like, oh, you.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
Know, she thinks I'm traty. She likes my titties.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Maybe I am cute because if I'm all over the
dude now there's jealousy. As you say, otherwise you always
pay attention to the girl.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Yes, but not been in this industry for so long,
Like I've I had couples like people email me, hit
me up. It was a guy and his wife was like, hey,
we're coming in town in San Francisco, like you could
come over and fuck my wife. I'm like what, I'm like, Suli,
move man, my dog's all my business move. I'm like, wait,
this is I was like, really, this was like when
(09:33):
I first started, like a couple of years in the industry,
and I'm like, all right, whatever, go to the Saint
Regis's in San Francisco, a nice hotel. I'm doing all
the communication with the husband. I'm like, all right, there's
better not be no weird shit when I get here
and all that, and then I get up there. It's
a fine Asian woman. I'm like, so I'm probably get
paid has sex with his wife and something I would
do for free. And I'm like it was weird. He's
(09:54):
recording and shit, and I'm like all right, you know,
like but you gotta be respectful in that type of way,
Like I communicate with him through and then I could
talk to his wife. I can't just go straight to
her like you know, or try to hear her up
on the side by myself. You know, you gotta have
etiquette with that shit.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
A thousand a thousand. It's fucked up to say it
like that, but it's so facts.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
You have to have threesome etiquette, Like there needs to
be like a YouTube video, like there needs.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
To be a whole bit like yeah, like there.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Is threesome unwritten rules and there is like etiquette.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
You're completely correct.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Mm yeah, and sometimes people and certain people ain't built
for that shit either. You know, you gotta be built
for that because some people feelings get involved and they
act weird and shit.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I actually one of my friends she had asked me.
She was like, no, no, you know, have you ever
had a three someome?
Speaker 4 (10:47):
I'm like, bitch, paupe lanky.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
So she was coming she was coming to me, you know,
telling me like her dude wants to have a threesome.
And all I told her is I'm like, can you
handle him with another girl?
Speaker 4 (11:00):
That's all you gotta think about.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
I was like, can you handle being with him being
with another girl? That's a b She's the one who
told me. She was like, I want to I want
to go with someone that I know. And I'm like, no, bitch,
no no.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
I was like, you can't know.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
The bitch, and he cannot know the bitch.
Speaker 4 (11:21):
It can't be someone y'all work with someone that you
get a friends. Oh yeah, cousin, I don't know what
the fuck you know? People are weird.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
It cannot be people that you know. And I even
told her, I was like, it's gonna sound kind of bad,
but the best way to go is escort.
Speaker 4 (11:35):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Like it's sad, but it's like, no, that's real, that's real.
That's real. I'm not saying that. That's real because if
you're picking someone you know or somewhere too close and shit,
that shit to get messy.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
They gets super messy, like oh you why you want
her back? Why why do you want to.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
Call her back?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
YadA YadA YadA, and I'm like, no, no, you can't.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
And especially if you see them often, it just it
gets that jealousy where like are you.
Speaker 4 (12:01):
Are you at work talking to her about it?
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Yeah, because then you if you feel like if one
of the pieces of that link feel like they missing
out on something, that shit is like, all right, what's
going on?
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:12):
There there's always some type of like why are you
guys talking about a threesome? You know what I'm saying,
Like if it's with someone you know, say, like the
dude is like.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Hey, babe, I want a threesome. And I actually know
a girl who is down like she says she likes
both of us, and it's.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Like, why in the fuck are you even talking and
threesomes with this bitch? That's the first thing that comes
to my head. So no, I don't want that bitch.
No fuck you like a always let the girl choose.
If you're gonna have with another girl, let the girl choose.
If you're gonna have sex with another dude, let the
dude choose.
Speaker 4 (12:47):
That's just unwritten rule.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
That's real. That's actually you explain that pretty good because
like when I look at it when I'm in like
the porner industry, Like you know, you can just do
whatever you want shit, But then a lot of people,
like you know, I shoot with one girl like Jelle Julie,
I should have heard like a lot, and then I
shoot a few other girls. There's a few other couples
that do the same thing out there. Sometimes even that
(13:11):
shit can get tricky, Like you know, like you think
just because you're import okay, you can just do a threesome.
There are no problem with all that. But if if
it's feelings involved in whoever's seeking out first and how
you're going out about it, that should get trigged. If
I'm like, oh, all right, I already got this lined up.
Whatever need you say? Yeah, Like, wait, so you already
had this lined up two weeks ago. You've been talking
(13:32):
about this. Sorry I didn't. No shit, It makes.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
People feel uncomfortable a thousand percent, Like why why are
you interested in someone else to the.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Point where you're trying to bring them into the relationship.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
You got me fucked up.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I learned to I learned to be real about that
shit when I was at a kind of younger age
because I had a girl I was talking to and
got caught up, and she was like, if you would
have just told me you didn't even know, like I was,
I was down with shit like that. And I was like, damn, okay,
maybe I should just yes, Oh my.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
God, let's get let's focus on that for two seves. Listen,
when you.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Like, dudes always think that a females aren't down or
they think that a lie is gonna be the better
outcome at the end of the And I'm like, when
dudes are married, when dudes are in a relationship, if
you want a threesome, if you want an open relationship,
if you want any of that, be fucking for real,
(14:27):
be upfront, be fucking honest, because at the end of
the day, business are freaking. Business are just as freaky
as dudes. And they want it too.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
They want to they want to, like you know.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
They're curious about their sexual side. They're like, let's be
inside or whatever. The girls will be down. And just
like I told a lot because a lot of my
exes ended up being married and I found out later
on in the relationship, right, and I would tell my exes,
I'm like, you understand, Like, I'm way okay with being
a sidekick. It's actually better than being in a relationship.
(14:59):
If you would told me that you were married, I
would have still been down.
Speaker 4 (15:04):
But now I have actual realist feelings for you, and now.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
I find out that you're married, it's a different thing.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
Ye, girls are always we'll not.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Always no no, no, let me not say that.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
But when when a girl wants a dude, she wants
that dude hands down. When she wants one dude, she's
gonna want that dude only. So if she's interested in
a dude that's.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Married, she's probably gonna be okay.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
With you with with still dating you. We're still being
with you, still fucking with you.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
However, if you get if you have her getting her
feelings involved in shit like that and she founds out later, Brad,
now gonna.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
Tell your wife. Now she's gonna put it on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Now she's gonna post it on Facebook her to fuck
up your life? Like why do that? I'm like, it's
half the time these girls.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Are actually willing to help you teat Like it'll be like,
oh babe, can I won't text you after seven?
Speaker 4 (15:54):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Like some girls are actually down like be I.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
It makes it, it makes it even or makes it
not even but just yeah, just easier because especially when
you get older too, like you got someone. Sometimes I
know a lot of people that got fucking relationships on
the side and they both married and they just come
together go to a little secret hotel one one time
in the week and they both go back to their
families and they they fine with that. You know.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Shit, it's ends up being like just that little relief,
like if you guys both have a little secret.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Sometimes it's like.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
Sometimes it's sexy, you know, like like, oh we're a
little secret.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
Oh my god, I don't let anyone see us. It's cute,
it's sexy.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
You know. Sometimes it's fun, but it doesn't make it
fun when you're the only ones stressing out about getting
caught and the other bitch has no idea, Like you're
you're stressing out about getting caught by two different bitches.
One bitch is enough, like we're crazy. We are girls
are fucking psychotic, but girls.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Are fucking crazy.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
So I'm like, now now you're now you're stressing but
getting caught up between two women.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
Where it's it.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
It could have just been one had a had a
homie that he's not a homie no more, because of
sh wild shait he does, but he had like six
girlfriends at once and like all different stories, like he
worked at different places for different ones and all that shit,
like s they all came to the same house. I'm like,
how do you even have a schedule where you can
(17:23):
have six different women coming in and out of that
house like cooking, And I'm like, man.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
That's true.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
What it's like? Those are people that like live off
of a life, wear fake shoes and claim they're real.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
I'm like, bruh oh, yeah, yeah, and believe and yeah
and believe. They believe they lives.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
They believe their own lives.
Speaker 4 (17:44):
That is facts.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Th h.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
They like, make up a life, believe it and then
tell other people about it. And I'm like, sounds so
convincing because you believe it too.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
N I can't.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I could not handle it. That shit I cannot handle.
I don't lie personally. I know people don't believe it,
but I do not lie. I wouldn't lie to save
my life.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Well, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna lie. I used
to lie like like I mean my I mean, I'm
like now like when the older I'm getting I really
don't give a fuck about telling the truth no more.
But like just as a young dude, just fucking around,
moving around and shit like not I want to say
telling lies, but just you know, pushing shit over the edge,
(18:29):
you know, adding a little bit funk on it, you know,
making it sound better than what it is or no.
But as I got older, I'm like, you know what,
I ain't got time for that. You're fucking with me
for who I am. Whatever it's up, But yeah, you
know as funny asay.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
I had just went to the nailshop the other day,
was I mean, I went to the nail shop and
I told the lady.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
I was like, I can't do no designs right now
on my.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Nails because she tried just two dollars a fucking nails.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
It's been crazy, you had twenty extra dollars.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I'm no we get so I told her, I was like,
no design.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
I was like, I just on a plain color because
I'm brokeren now.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
The city's just like they're like, I'm broke right now.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
Mind you My nail still costs one hundred dollars to
fucking dude.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
And I was like, I'm like I'm broken now, and
she was like, oh my God, you're so honest.
Speaker 4 (19:13):
You Oh my god, you just said that you're broken.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
I was like, yeah, bitch, Like like, do you have
people that are that fucking fake that would sit there
and like press their money for a fucking nail design
that they can't afford? Like, nah, bitch, I'm telling you
the truth. Leave it glossy, Like what the leave it
plane and glossy. I'm good, like I'm brokeren And she
she looked at me like she was just in shock.
Where I was like, like, it's it's that uncommon to
(19:37):
see people be real about a situation.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Oh yeah, it is, it is, it really is.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
Today.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
I was on a podcast earlier and the dude, the
dude I had said something about like I don't date,
you know, because I like being single. I'm bama, I'm
perfectly fine the way I am. And he was like
and all of them collectively were like, yeah, she just
doesn't date. She just doesn't do that, Like my friends
don't be They're like that, she just doesn't do that.
And he was like is it because of trauma? And
(20:04):
I looked at him and he was like, oh, WHOA,
Like I didn't I didn't expect you to, like admit it,
and I'm like, it's I mean, but it's true. Like
why are people so ashamed to like admit the things
that are hard in life? I guess you can say,
like people people can't admit that they're going through hard times.
They still want to have fake lubatal or like fake shoes,
fake bags and shit like that, just to try to
(20:26):
prove that they have money that they don't have. I'm like, no,
I'll walk around broke. I don't give a fuck the
fuck you're gonna do pay my bills? No, So I'm
just gonna act like I'm broke.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
I mean shit. You know that's like that shit is
based on society and how people look at shit. Nobody
want like, you know, like your neighbor shit. Your neighbor's
are stranger now people don't want to be knowing people's
or you don't want people in your business, but you
want to be able to portray shit back out there
that you want to show, you know what I mean,
Like especially with you know, Instagram and shit, or like
especially with what I do. People think I'm out here
(20:55):
fucking every day like it ain't. It's nothing close to
Sometime I post a video from two years ago, but
I just make it look like it was recent or
something like that. You know it ain't. I'm not out
here every day doing it. So with internet and all that,
people want to live a certain life, but you you
ain't gonna catch nobody going to the club. So man,
I only can I'm buying one drink tonight because you know,
I ain't got it like that. You know, people ain't
(21:16):
trying to say that shit. But if it is what
it is, come here and get your one drink and
be cool.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
Yeah, because people are so scared about what they're gonna
think about you, like oh, oh, Lana Lona couldn't grow
up because she didn't have no money.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
And I'm like, yeah, okay, I didn't have no money
to spend, but my bills.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Are paid and I have extra money, just like I
have money in my savings.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I just don't want to spend money on a fucking bar.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Like or like a club that I was fifty dollars
to get in or some stupid shit and now I
gotta buy drinks and she's trying to keep up with
you guys, I can't.
Speaker 4 (21:49):
I just don't want to, like, like, come to my house.
I got a seventeen dollars bottle vodka.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
You know, I said her, Like when when I was younger,
my my parties was like, I want to go out
to the club drinking takovaka, young shit, just get out there. Now,
I'm like, I rather chill out the house drink smoke.
We could watch a movie and chill on some shit
like that. That's that's about. That's like my f.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
O O day.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
I'm so listen, listen. Here's my theory. I fucking pay
rent to be here. Why the fuck would I leave
if I'm not making money? It makes no fucking sense
to me. I'm like, like, just like you guys pay
to get into Dra's if you win, if you got paid,
I mean, if you paid to get into Dre's and
(22:36):
then they kick you out right away or something like that. Oh,
we're gonna go to another bar and we'll be like, wait,
I just paid fifty dollars to be here, Why the
fuck would I leave? That's how I feel about my rent.
I paid a lot of money to live here. Why
the fuck would I leave?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
It?
Speaker 1 (22:51):
My own bottle service, right like, I.
Speaker 4 (22:54):
Got I got weed, I got all the extra knickknacks.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
I don't know if I say that no, you can't.
Speaker 4 (23:01):
I got all sit here.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
I'm like, I could party hard in my house and
I can lay around on the floor if I want
to do.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
My floors are clean.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
I don't have to be worried about cod and and
this motherfuck never closes.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
Closed it but.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
It's for exclusively, it's invite only looking.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
At I'd rather be at home.
Speaker 1 (23:28):
I feel now, I feel you know, I hell it feel, Oh,
I should let me see. There's one more thing I
want to do before I close it out us. It's
gonna be on you though, because always, like every time
I have somebody on here, I want them to tell
like it can be a funny story, crazy sexual story,
(23:52):
something just wild, or something in the industry that you've seen,
like something that stories okay, on and on, give me one.
Speaker 3 (24:04):
I got two stories and they were both when I
was a cam girl. I was camming, yah was. And
you know what's funny is I was camming for.
Speaker 4 (24:11):
A very short amount of time.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
But I think I've seen more on cam than I've
ever seen in my entire fucking life.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
But number one was I actually saw this dude go
into like a straight like scorpion pose.
Speaker 4 (24:25):
I don't even know how to say it.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
Like he he lay down on his bed, threw his
legs up on the wall, like sitting on his shoulder,
kind of like a yoga pose. He jacked off his
fucking dick. Okay, and then I'm talking his dick is straight,
like face to face with him, he's jacking.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
Off his dick.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Homie came in his.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
Mouth and swallowed it.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Whoa.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
And I looked at him like, I'm so curious that
I couldn't take my eyes off of it.
Speaker 4 (24:55):
One of those like it's so like I want to
look away, but there's no I'm not.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
I can't even blink right now. I don't want to
miss a shit hold nutt it in his.
Speaker 4 (25:04):
Mouth clean like, and so I don't swallow. Bro, I'm like,
I don't even swallow. You swallowed your own nut. Oh,
I just was nasty. Okay, that's storing number.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
One, storing omber two.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
This look it's better.
Speaker 3 (25:23):
So this dude I get on cam and this dude goes,
I have a surprise for you, sweetie. This dude was
like cool ass like seventies, like early seventies, all right,
He's like, I got a surprise for you. Sweetheart and
goes off camera. This dude comes back on screen in
a red dress, a red thng and red heels.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
Okay, he was.
Speaker 3 (25:46):
He was Julia Roberts lady and red motherfucker pnut And
I was like, oh, you look pretty sexy, naughty girl.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
Like I was like, do I call you a he
and it a girl? I don't know if to tell you,
so it's like, you look great. This dude starts stripping.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
He's stripping down, and mind you, I have this on video.
Speaker 4 (26:08):
I can prove this shit.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
This dude starts stripping down and he grabs a chair,
puts it on the side. I was like, he flips
the regular ass chair, puts it on the side, and
I'm talking he put the tip of the leg of
the chair like the bottom of the chair, puts it
on his.
Speaker 2 (26:27):
Dick and starts stump fucking the chair like the chair
was in his dick.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
I was like, bro, that would hurt my clip. You
have a whole weiener, so falk. Bro.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
He was stump fucking the ship and I'm talking like
like hard, like he was rubbing that shit and like
spanking the chair and ship like.
Speaker 4 (26:51):
He was like that was a whole bitch.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
Oh my god.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
I was like you, I've seen it all.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
I've seen it all, and I said, you know, it's
plenty as I thought. I was doing it just like
you know, as long as he's not doing.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
This in person, I feel like a great person for
just watching him.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
And he's at home locked in his room because like
he was, he was wasn't he was Caitlyn Jenner fucking
the chair that ship, bro.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
That shit was so disturbing. I got it on video.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Wow, I was. I was trying to get through the
first one, and then you hit me with the second one.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
Damn asked questions.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
That's the way, that's the way, go ahead.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
I was because when you when you said scorpion. At first,
I'm like, he's on his stomach or his back.
Speaker 4 (27:42):
And then I was like, yeah, he's on his back.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
He basically like on his back and kind of like
yoga pose like like was holding his back with his hands,
if that makes sense, and his legs were touching the wall,
so he was like curled up in like a little sea,
and then he opened his legs and just started going
ham on his dick swallowed it. Yeah, like straight not scorpi,
(28:07):
I guess like a backward scorpion. I guess yeah, yeah, yeah,
maybe I use the wrong term, but yeah, that homie.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
Well I know that, Like CAM is crazy though, because
I didn't hear a lot of shit on there. I
didn't done like a couple of shows and ship on there,
so I didn't I didn't see. But it never be
like cam to cam though, because a lot of people
be asked for that. But I'm like, I ain't trying
to have weird ship pop up on my face and ship.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Oh man, I've had the weird ship.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
That was That was a good quest that, like because
my voice, because that sound like a little girl. They're
asking it's called age play. They were like, do you
mind doing age play? And I was like, like, how
old am I supposed to be acting?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
And they're like, you know, like teenager. I was like,
that's when I go cussing them out.
Speaker 3 (28:52):
You fucking prob, you fucking proverb, you child molass, so
you fucking shit.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
I go in on them and then they log out
and I'm.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Like, as long as I know, I feel like I
did myself, you're helping them, Uh should hush. I'm glad
I smoke before this because it makes so much better.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Smoking.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
I want you to give out all your all your
socials where people can find your information. Did you start
your your only fans like your your comedy stuff on there?
I did? I did?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Yeah, everything like everything on all platforms.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
I'm Lona Arry's Comedy spelled l A N A C
h A I R e Z Comedy and that's on
all platforms. And if they want to see my my
Only Fans premium page, I'm on Lona Chary's Premium. So
you guys can follow me everywhere I'm on. I'm on Twitter,
I'm on Uh, I'm on Instagram, I'm on Only Fans,
(29:59):
I'm on tip Talk else YouTube, I'm on YouTube also,
so yeah, I mean they can follow me anyway they want.
And I have different content on all different platforms so
that it stays interesting.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Cool cool. Make sure I put the link in there
in the BYO on this so people can make sure
it hit you up. Thank you for coming on you
You pretty much did everything, you know, but yeah, definitely
make sure I send this to you, and also yeah,
make sure we promote your podcast and get your stuff
(30:31):
really too. Thank you all right, happy Thanksgiving, Bye, take
care
Yo, yo, yo yo. Happy Thanksgiving to everybody out there,
thanks to tuning in to fuck it and start about
with your high X very cool, simple, smooth episode I
got here. I hope everybody's having a good day for
the holidays. Make sure y'all drink slipping on a little vodka.
Doing this the night of or the night before Thanksgiving.
(00:23):
Maybe if I'm not too fucking tipsy at MIT, I
might put this bitch out tonight. But yeah, make sure
you have a good time. Man, be safe out there.
Uh this one. I got a cool little interview with
someone's special. She's gonna introduce herself out here. She's hilarious.
I mean, I don't know women. There's not that many
women that are like her. She's she's funny, she got
(00:46):
a different look on life. She's the type of woman
that some guys. I feel like most guys can have
no woman like her because she's too honest and too
real and shit. But she's hilarious. She makes she she
puts like sexual things or she made like a sexual
top into some comedy like she she hella funny. I
(01:07):
fuck with her tough. We got a funny story too.
When I did a photo shoot for her, It's hello funny,
but yeah, thank you all for tuning to fucking le's
talk about with Johann X. I've been smoking all day too,
I've been like super high. So yeah, make sure y'all
hit the subscribe button the like, follow me on Instagram
the real johann X, and yeah, let's get into it.
(01:28):
Happy holidays. Did you when we share we're live now
this is part of the podcast. I leave shit in
here like this, but yeah, so we start off like this.
I want you to introduce yourself. Let my listeners know
who you are and what you got going on.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Motherfucking terries.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
I am the world's sexiest comedian, a live kind of.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I'm funny as fun though, but that's me. I'm Lanaitaries.
Speaker 3 (01:55):
You guys can follow me at Lana Charry's Comedy on
all platforms.
Speaker 1 (02:02):
There it is, there, it is. And like most people
don't listen to my podcast, they know that I really
don't have no structure and ship when I'm doing this,
but talking with like really talking with you, I'm like,
I don't need to I don't need to sell nothing.
I don't need to come up with no magic plan,
Like I just let you be you and it's that
shit's amazing.
Speaker 3 (02:22):
Reason at anything, I would like, I will talk about anything.
Speaker 4 (02:26):
I'm open to anything.
Speaker 1 (02:28):
So I always tell like a funny story on here
and shit, so like to give people an idea of
like I mean, this ain't who you are, but like
to let people know how we meant and shit, we
was gonna do the I was gonna do a photo
shoot for you because I was like, you know, I'm
trying to get to like start doing photo shoots and
start doing my own work like that and planned out
(02:51):
everything was perfect, cool, there's some some shrooms got involved,
even like model that shows up with shrews and the thing.
Speaker 4 (03:03):
You just you just have them on deck. I'm like, yeah,
want something.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And the thing about me too is like when I
be doing shit like that, like I always try to
be like really professional, not like I'm uptight, not like
I try to be uptight and shit, but like I
try to be professional. But I'm like, you know what
if you offering him, yeah, what's up? And then that
shit just had me like oh and I'm like god,
then I start thinking, I'm like damn, I be an unprofessional?
How my acting.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Like it was so much fun you know what the
I want to tell this story real fast. I remember
you followed me on Instagram, and I have followed.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
You back just because I thought your page was cool.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I was like, oh, you know, he's like like he's cute.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
I follow him back click until one time I was
alone at home kind of feeling a little frisky, and
I go and I'm on you porn and then I'm
just scrolling, scrolling, and I'm like John. I was like,
there's only one person in the entire world that I
know that has that name. And me and him had
been like texting back and forth on on like.
Speaker 2 (04:06):
DM's just chill shit too.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
It wasn't like nothing crazy, but like you we were
just dming and then and then I was like, bro,
that's the homies we weed.
Speaker 4 (04:16):
Oh my god, that's the homies we we bro.
Speaker 3 (04:19):
I sawed and then I texted him on the DMS
and I was like, bro, I just saw your dance.
And then I remember one of my friends was like, bro,
I would have clicked off so quick, and I was like,
clicked off fu that Like I.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
Was over there like get that ship, like freaking backs
and ship.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Oh yeah, that's all funny because I get that. You're
a lot like some of my homies.
Speaker 3 (04:42):
Never known it, like literally because we have been texted
with dming for like a cool minute and it wasn't
nothing like that, Like it wasn't.
Speaker 4 (04:49):
Like it wasn't no flirty ship. It was just like
we were just mad cool with you.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yeah, none nothing yeah, like yeah, it was.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
Nothing disrespectful, nothing weird.
Speaker 4 (04:59):
And I was like, oh my.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
God, like I know that, homie.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
That's great. I'm telling you. I got like friends that
be hitting me up and they be somebody. They be
on there and ship trying to get off and then
like he's like, yeah, I ain't be looking in the
category of your ship and then your ship just pop
up and I'm like, man, I'm done for the day.
Speaker 2 (05:19):
That's fucked up.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
That would that would make me dry up.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Too, Like like if I had a dick, I'd go
lift like like I know you, I play ball with you.
Speaker 1 (05:31):
It's different like you like I always always talk about it.
I'm like, niggas be watching ship and you see it.
You see a regular time you go see a dick
while you're watch it, no matter what. But since it's
someone you know now is like so okay, what the
fuck Like no, it's it's different from me now.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
It's so different when you know the person you're like,
am I supposed to be like like he's doing it right?
But like should I be watching? Like you know, like
I like that scene's cool. I'm like with the bathtub
like that's dope. But am I supposed to be? Well,
like this is weird now?
Speaker 1 (06:08):
So I got fund is that like they we're saying
ship Like, man, if we was having like a three
summer we have some chick were about to run or
something like I don't know if I were, I want
to do it because you're gonna whip out, you get
you a porn star, you know how to do what
you're doing or whatever. And I'm just sitting here like, man,
I can't have fucking fun with the homies no more.
Speaker 4 (06:25):
I was like, you know what you do three with
another dude?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Would you would? Yeah?
Speaker 2 (06:32):
You just don't make eye contact.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
There's when it when it comes to you like that,
it's like, uh, guys got unwritten rolls and codes, like
especially when I was in high school and college and
all that ship like when that ship just happens, it happens.
But you know some and some niggas be when they
tag a team and they be making eye contact and
saying what's up, stabbing up and clapping hands and ship.
(06:57):
See that's the thing though with me, Like when it
comes like that. When I was young and I was
doing it, it's like I call it like running train
and ship. But now that I'm older, it's it's a threesome.
You know, like if if me and me and a
guy got a chick, Yeah, we're gonna make sure she
get her her best time, playable and all that. But
it's not like, oh, we ran training, like oh no,
just a three something, you know. It's like a little
(07:19):
I guess since I'm older now, I look at it
a little different, like.
Speaker 4 (07:23):
There's a switch off.
Speaker 1 (07:24):
Yeah, but.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
I've never had that.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
I've never had.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
Sex with two dudes at the same time. It's just
I just made a post about this, and I swear
on God because this is really how I think if
I if I was gonna have.
Speaker 2 (07:36):
A threesome with two dudes, it wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (07:38):
Work out because I'm like, Okay, I want y'all to
touch dicks. You guys, you can't have two dicks out
and not play with them. Not playing with each other too,
So I'm like, nah, I need I need you guys to.
Speaker 4 (07:50):
Like touch tips just a little bit and make them.
Speaker 2 (07:53):
Out a little bit.
Speaker 4 (07:56):
I would ruin it.
Speaker 1 (07:57):
Is that just the Is that just the comedy answer?
Is that the real true answer.
Speaker 4 (08:02):
I'm totally honest.
Speaker 3 (08:04):
I cannot have sex with two dudes at the same time,
two girls.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
Thousand percent a dude.
Speaker 4 (08:09):
And a girl.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
But they say most women, They say most women, that's
like the fantasy would be to have two guys because
like another girl there girls be jealous and shit like that.
Speaker 3 (08:21):
No, I'm I'm by I'm hear me out though, when
it comes to threesomes, because I'm I'm like a I'm
usually a third I like, I like fucking couples, but
when it comes to fucking couples, you the girl always
got to pay attention to the girl.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
That's just that's that's unwritten rule.
Speaker 3 (08:38):
If anyone wants to have sex with a couple, just
pay attention to the girl, unless the girl says otherwise.
Speaker 2 (08:45):
That's just hands down, you compliment the bitch.
Speaker 3 (08:47):
I walk in, girl, you got nice hair, look at you,
your boots look so cute, and you flirting with the girl.
The dude ain't gonna say shit, the dude loves it.
You're you're flirting with his girl. And if I'm flirting
with the girl now she feels like, oh, you.
Speaker 4 (09:00):
Know, she thinks I'm traty. She likes my titties.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
Maybe I am cute because if I'm all over the
dude now there's jealousy. As you say, otherwise you always
pay attention to the girl.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
Yes, but not been in this industry for so long,
Like I've I had couples like people email me, hit
me up. It was a guy and his wife was like, hey,
we're coming in town in San Francisco, like you could
come over and fuck my wife. I'm like what, I'm like, Suli,
move man, my dog's all my business move. I'm like, wait,
this is I was like, really, this was like when
(09:33):
I first started, like a couple of years in the industry,
and I'm like, all right, whatever, go to the Saint
Regis's in San Francisco, a nice hotel. I'm doing all
the communication with the husband. I'm like, all right, there's
better not be no weird shit when I get here
and all that, and then I get up there. It's
a fine Asian woman. I'm like, so I'm probably get
paid has sex with his wife and something I would
do for free. And I'm like it was weird. He's
(09:54):
recording and shit, and I'm like all right, you know,
like but you gotta be respectful in that type of way,
Like I communicate with him through and then I could
talk to his wife. I can't just go straight to
her like you know, or try to hear her up
on the side by myself. You know, you gotta have
etiquette with that shit.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
A thousand a thousand. It's fucked up to say it
like that, but it's so facts.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
You have to have threesome etiquette, Like there needs to
be like a YouTube video, like there needs.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
To be a whole bit like yeah, like there.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
Is threesome unwritten rules and there is like etiquette.
Speaker 4 (10:29):
You're completely correct.
Speaker 1 (10:31):
Mm yeah, and sometimes people and certain people ain't built
for that shit either. You know, you gotta be built
for that because some people feelings get involved and they
act weird and shit.
Speaker 2 (10:42):
I actually one of my friends she had asked me.
She was like, no, no, you know, have you ever
had a three someome?
Speaker 4 (10:47):
I'm like, bitch, paupe lanky.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
So she was coming she was coming to me, you know,
telling me like her dude wants to have a threesome.
And all I told her is I'm like, can you
handle him with another girl?
Speaker 4 (11:00):
That's all you gotta think about.
Speaker 3 (11:02):
I was like, can you handle being with him being
with another girl? That's a b She's the one who
told me. She was like, I want to I want
to go with someone that I know. And I'm like, no, bitch,
no no.
Speaker 4 (11:17):
I was like, you can't know.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
The bitch, and he cannot know the bitch.
Speaker 4 (11:21):
It can't be someone y'all work with someone that you
get a friends. Oh yeah, cousin, I don't know what
the fuck you know? People are weird.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
It cannot be people that you know. And I even
told her, I was like, it's gonna sound kind of bad,
but the best way to go is escort.
Speaker 4 (11:35):
Bro.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Like it's sad, but it's like, no, that's real, that's real.
That's real. I'm not saying that. That's real because if
you're picking someone you know or somewhere too close and shit,
that shit to get messy.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
They gets super messy, like oh you why you want
her back? Why why do you want to.
Speaker 4 (11:51):
Call her back?
Speaker 2 (11:52):
YadA YadA YadA, and I'm like, no, no, you can't.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
And especially if you see them often, it just it
gets that jealousy where like are you.
Speaker 4 (12:01):
Are you at work talking to her about it?
Speaker 1 (12:04):
Yeah, because then you if you feel like if one
of the pieces of that link feel like they missing
out on something, that shit is like, all right, what's
going on?
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:12):
There there's always some type of like why are you
guys talking about a threesome? You know what I'm saying,
Like if it's with someone you know, say, like the
dude is like.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
Hey, babe, I want a threesome. And I actually know
a girl who is down like she says she likes
both of us, and it's.
Speaker 3 (12:27):
Like, why in the fuck are you even talking and
threesomes with this bitch? That's the first thing that comes
to my head. So no, I don't want that bitch.
No fuck you like a always let the girl choose.
If you're gonna have with another girl, let the girl choose.
If you're gonna have sex with another dude, let the
dude choose.
Speaker 4 (12:47):
That's just unwritten rule.
Speaker 1 (12:50):
That's real. That's actually you explain that pretty good because
like when I look at it when I'm in like
the porner industry, Like you know, you can just do
whatever you want shit, But then a lot of people,
like you know, I shoot with one girl like Jelle Julie,
I should have heard like a lot, and then I
shoot a few other girls. There's a few other couples
that do the same thing out there. Sometimes even that
(13:11):
shit can get tricky, Like you know, like you think
just because you're import okay, you can just do a threesome.
There are no problem with all that. But if if
it's feelings involved in whoever's seeking out first and how
you're going out about it, that should get trigged. If
I'm like, oh, all right, I already got this lined up.
Whatever need you say? Yeah, Like, wait, so you already
had this lined up two weeks ago. You've been talking
(13:32):
about this. Sorry I didn't. No shit, It makes.
Speaker 3 (13:35):
People feel uncomfortable a thousand percent, Like why why are
you interested in someone else to the.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Point where you're trying to bring them into the relationship.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
You got me fucked up.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I learned to I learned to be real about that
shit when I was at a kind of younger age
because I had a girl I was talking to and
got caught up, and she was like, if you would
have just told me you didn't even know, like I was,
I was down with shit like that. And I was like, damn, okay,
maybe I should just yes, Oh my.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
God, let's get let's focus on that for two seves. Listen,
when you.
Speaker 3 (14:07):
Like, dudes always think that a females aren't down or
they think that a lie is gonna be the better
outcome at the end of the And I'm like, when
dudes are married, when dudes are in a relationship, if
you want a threesome, if you want an open relationship,
if you want any of that, be fucking for real,
(14:27):
be upfront, be fucking honest, because at the end of
the day, business are freaking. Business are just as freaky
as dudes. And they want it too.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
They want to they want to, like you know.
Speaker 3 (14:38):
They're curious about their sexual side. They're like, let's be
inside or whatever. The girls will be down. And just
like I told a lot because a lot of my
exes ended up being married and I found out later
on in the relationship, right, and I would tell my exes,
I'm like, you understand, Like, I'm way okay with being
a sidekick. It's actually better than being in a relationship.
(14:59):
If you would told me that you were married, I
would have still been down.
Speaker 4 (15:04):
But now I have actual realist feelings for you, and now.
Speaker 1 (15:07):
I find out that you're married, it's a different thing.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
Ye, girls are always we'll not.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Always no no, no, let me not say that.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
But when when a girl wants a dude, she wants
that dude hands down. When she wants one dude, she's
gonna want that dude only. So if she's interested in
a dude that's.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Married, she's probably gonna be okay.
Speaker 4 (15:29):
With you with with still dating you. We're still being
with you, still fucking with you.
Speaker 3 (15:34):
However, if you get if you have her getting her
feelings involved in shit like that and she founds out later, Brad,
now gonna.
Speaker 4 (15:41):
Tell your wife. Now she's gonna put it on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Now she's gonna post it on Facebook her to fuck
up your life? Like why do that? I'm like, it's
half the time these girls.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
Are actually willing to help you teat Like it'll be like,
oh babe, can I won't text you after seven?
Speaker 4 (15:54):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (15:55):
Yes?
Speaker 4 (15:56):
Like some girls are actually down like be I.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
It makes it, it makes it even or makes it
not even but just yeah, just easier because especially when
you get older too, like you got someone. Sometimes I
know a lot of people that got fucking relationships on
the side and they both married and they just come
together go to a little secret hotel one one time
in the week and they both go back to their
families and they they fine with that. You know.
Speaker 3 (16:18):
Shit, it's ends up being like just that little relief,
like if you guys both have a little secret.
Speaker 4 (16:25):
Sometimes it's like.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
Sometimes it's sexy, you know, like like, oh we're a
little secret.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
Oh my god, I don't let anyone see us. It's cute,
it's sexy.
Speaker 3 (16:33):
You know. Sometimes it's fun, but it doesn't make it
fun when you're the only ones stressing out about getting
caught and the other bitch has no idea, Like you're
you're stressing out about getting caught by two different bitches.
One bitch is enough, like we're crazy. We are girls
are fucking psychotic, but girls.
Speaker 4 (16:56):
Are fucking crazy.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
So I'm like, now now you're now you're stressing but
getting caught up between two women.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
Where it's it.
Speaker 1 (17:02):
It could have just been one had a had a
homie that he's not a homie no more, because of
sh wild shait he does, but he had like six
girlfriends at once and like all different stories, like he
worked at different places for different ones and all that shit,
like s they all came to the same house. I'm like,
how do you even have a schedule where you can
(17:23):
have six different women coming in and out of that
house like cooking, And I'm like, man.
Speaker 4 (17:28):
That's true.
Speaker 3 (17:29):
What it's like? Those are people that like live off
of a life, wear fake shoes and claim they're real.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
I'm like, bruh oh, yeah, yeah, and believe and yeah
and believe. They believe they lives.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
They believe their own lives.
Speaker 4 (17:44):
That is facts.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Th h.
Speaker 3 (17:46):
They like, make up a life, believe it and then
tell other people about it. And I'm like, sounds so
convincing because you believe it too.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
N I can't.
Speaker 3 (17:59):
I could not handle it. That shit I cannot handle.
I don't lie personally. I know people don't believe it,
but I do not lie. I wouldn't lie to save
my life.
Speaker 1 (18:07):
Well, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna lie. I used
to lie like like I mean my I mean, I'm
like now like when the older I'm getting I really
don't give a fuck about telling the truth no more.
But like just as a young dude, just fucking around,
moving around and shit like not I want to say
telling lies, but just you know, pushing shit over the edge,
(18:29):
you know, adding a little bit funk on it, you know,
making it sound better than what it is or no.
But as I got older, I'm like, you know what,
I ain't got time for that. You're fucking with me
for who I am. Whatever it's up, But yeah, you
know as funny asay.
Speaker 3 (18:42):
I had just went to the nailshop the other day,
was I mean, I went to the nail shop and
I told the lady.
Speaker 2 (18:47):
I was like, I can't do no designs right now
on my.
Speaker 4 (18:50):
Nails because she tried just two dollars a fucking nails.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
It's been crazy, you had twenty extra dollars.
Speaker 4 (18:55):
I'm no we get so I told her, I was like,
no design.
Speaker 2 (18:59):
I was like, I just on a plain color because
I'm brokeren now.
Speaker 4 (19:02):
The city's just like they're like, I'm broke right now.
Speaker 3 (19:04):
Mind you My nail still costs one hundred dollars to
fucking dude.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
And I was like, I'm like I'm broken now, and
she was like, oh my God, you're so honest.
Speaker 4 (19:13):
You Oh my god, you just said that you're broken.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
I was like, yeah, bitch, Like like, do you have
people that are that fucking fake that would sit there
and like press their money for a fucking nail design
that they can't afford? Like, nah, bitch, I'm telling you
the truth. Leave it glossy, Like what the leave it
plane and glossy. I'm good, like I'm brokeren And she
she looked at me like she was just in shock.
Where I was like, like, it's it's that uncommon to
(19:37):
see people be real about a situation.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Oh yeah, it is, it is, it really is.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
Today.
Speaker 3 (19:44):
I was on a podcast earlier and the dude, the
dude I had said something about like I don't date,
you know, because I like being single. I'm bama, I'm
perfectly fine the way I am. And he was like
and all of them collectively were like, yeah, she just
doesn't date. She just doesn't do that, Like my friends
don't be They're like that, she just doesn't do that.
And he was like is it because of trauma? And
(20:04):
I looked at him and he was like, oh, WHOA,
Like I didn't I didn't expect you to, like admit it,
and I'm like, it's I mean, but it's true. Like
why are people so ashamed to like admit the things
that are hard in life? I guess you can say,
like people people can't admit that they're going through hard times.
They still want to have fake lubatal or like fake shoes,
fake bags and shit like that, just to try to
(20:26):
prove that they have money that they don't have. I'm like, no,
I'll walk around broke. I don't give a fuck the
fuck you're gonna do pay my bills? No, So I'm
just gonna act like I'm broke.
Speaker 1 (20:35):
I mean shit. You know that's like that shit is
based on society and how people look at shit. Nobody
want like, you know, like your neighbor shit. Your neighbor's
are stranger now people don't want to be knowing people's
or you don't want people in your business, but you
want to be able to portray shit back out there
that you want to show, you know what I mean,
Like especially with you know, Instagram and shit, or like
especially with what I do. People think I'm out here
(20:55):
fucking every day like it ain't. It's nothing close to
Sometime I post a video from two years ago, but
I just make it look like it was recent or
something like that. You know it ain't. I'm not out
here every day doing it. So with internet and all that,
people want to live a certain life, but you you
ain't gonna catch nobody going to the club. So man,
I only can I'm buying one drink tonight because you know,
I ain't got it like that. You know, people ain't
(21:16):
trying to say that shit. But if it is what
it is, come here and get your one drink and
be cool.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
Yeah, because people are so scared about what they're gonna
think about you, like oh, oh, Lana Lona couldn't grow
up because she didn't have no money.
Speaker 2 (21:31):
And I'm like, yeah, okay, I didn't have no money
to spend, but my bills.
Speaker 4 (21:34):
Are paid and I have extra money, just like I
have money in my savings.
Speaker 2 (21:37):
I just don't want to spend money on a fucking bar.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Like or like a club that I was fifty dollars
to get in or some stupid shit and now I
gotta buy drinks and she's trying to keep up with
you guys, I can't.
Speaker 4 (21:49):
I just don't want to, like, like, come to my house.
I got a seventeen dollars bottle vodka.
Speaker 1 (21:55):
You know, I said her, Like when when I was younger,
my my parties was like, I want to go out
to the club drinking takovaka, young shit, just get out there. Now,
I'm like, I rather chill out the house drink smoke.
We could watch a movie and chill on some shit
like that. That's that's about. That's like my f.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
O O day.
Speaker 3 (22:15):
I'm so listen, listen. Here's my theory. I fucking pay
rent to be here. Why the fuck would I leave
if I'm not making money? It makes no fucking sense
to me. I'm like, like, just like you guys pay
to get into Dra's if you win, if you got paid,
I mean, if you paid to get into Dre's and
(22:36):
then they kick you out right away or something like that. Oh,
we're gonna go to another bar and we'll be like, wait,
I just paid fifty dollars to be here, Why the
fuck would I leave? That's how I feel about my rent.
I paid a lot of money to live here. Why
the fuck would I leave?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
It?
Speaker 1 (22:51):
My own bottle service, right like, I.
Speaker 4 (22:54):
Got I got weed, I got all the extra knickknacks.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
I don't know if I say that no, you can't.
Speaker 4 (23:01):
I got all sit here.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
I'm like, I could party hard in my house and
I can lay around on the floor if I want
to do.
Speaker 4 (23:07):
My floors are clean.
Speaker 1 (23:08):
I don't have to be worried about cod and and
this motherfuck never closes.
Speaker 4 (23:15):
Closed it but.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
It's for exclusively, it's invite only looking.
Speaker 4 (23:21):
At I'd rather be at home.
Speaker 1 (23:28):
I feel now, I feel you know, I hell it feel, Oh,
I should let me see. There's one more thing I
want to do before I close it out us. It's
gonna be on you though, because always, like every time
I have somebody on here, I want them to tell
like it can be a funny story, crazy sexual story,
(23:52):
something just wild, or something in the industry that you've seen,
like something that stories okay, on and on, give me one.
Speaker 3 (24:04):
I got two stories and they were both when I
was a cam girl. I was camming, yah was. And
you know what's funny is I was camming for.
Speaker 4 (24:11):
A very short amount of time.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
But I think I've seen more on cam than I've
ever seen in my entire fucking life.
Speaker 3 (24:17):
But number one was I actually saw this dude go
into like a straight like scorpion pose.
Speaker 4 (24:25):
I don't even know how to say it.
Speaker 3 (24:27):
Like he he lay down on his bed, threw his
legs up on the wall, like sitting on his shoulder,
kind of like a yoga pose. He jacked off his
fucking dick. Okay, and then I'm talking his dick is straight,
like face to face with him, he's jacking.
Speaker 4 (24:42):
Off his dick.
Speaker 2 (24:43):
Homie came in his.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
Mouth and swallowed it.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Whoa.
Speaker 3 (24:50):
And I looked at him like, I'm so curious that
I couldn't take my eyes off of it.
Speaker 4 (24:55):
One of those like it's so like I want to
look away, but there's no I'm not.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
I can't even blink right now. I don't want to
miss a shit hold nutt it in his.
Speaker 4 (25:04):
Mouth clean like, and so I don't swallow. Bro, I'm like,
I don't even swallow. You swallowed your own nut. Oh,
I just was nasty. Okay, that's storing number.
Speaker 2 (25:20):
One, storing omber two.
Speaker 4 (25:22):
This look it's better.
Speaker 3 (25:23):
So this dude I get on cam and this dude goes,
I have a surprise for you, sweetie. This dude was
like cool ass like seventies, like early seventies, all right,
He's like, I got a surprise for you. Sweetheart and
goes off camera. This dude comes back on screen in
a red dress, a red thng and red heels.
Speaker 4 (25:45):
Okay, he was.
Speaker 3 (25:46):
He was Julia Roberts lady and red motherfucker pnut And
I was like, oh, you look pretty sexy, naughty girl.
Speaker 4 (25:57):
Like I was like, do I call you a he
and it a girl? I don't know if to tell you,
so it's like, you look great. This dude starts stripping.
Speaker 2 (26:05):
He's stripping down, and mind you, I have this on video.
Speaker 4 (26:08):
I can prove this shit.
Speaker 3 (26:10):
This dude starts stripping down and he grabs a chair,
puts it on the side. I was like, he flips
the regular ass chair, puts it on the side, and
I'm talking he put the tip of the leg of
the chair like the bottom of the chair, puts it
on his.
Speaker 2 (26:27):
Dick and starts stump fucking the chair like the chair
was in his dick.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
I was like, bro, that would hurt my clip. You
have a whole weiener, so falk. Bro.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
He was stump fucking the ship and I'm talking like
like hard, like he was rubbing that shit and like
spanking the chair and ship like.
Speaker 4 (26:51):
He was like that was a whole bitch.
Speaker 1 (26:53):
Oh my god.
Speaker 4 (26:54):
I was like you, I've seen it all.
Speaker 3 (26:56):
I've seen it all, and I said, you know, it's
plenty as I thought. I was doing it just like
you know, as long as he's not doing.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
This in person, I feel like a great person for
just watching him.
Speaker 3 (27:06):
And he's at home locked in his room because like
he was, he was wasn't he was Caitlyn Jenner fucking
the chair that ship, bro.
Speaker 4 (27:16):
That shit was so disturbing. I got it on video.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Wow, I was. I was trying to get through the
first one, and then you hit me with the second one.
Speaker 4 (27:27):
Damn asked questions.
Speaker 2 (27:29):
That's the way, that's the way, go ahead.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
I was because when you when you said scorpion. At first,
I'm like, he's on his stomach or his back.
Speaker 4 (27:42):
And then I was like, yeah, he's on his back.
Speaker 3 (27:45):
He basically like on his back and kind of like
yoga pose like like was holding his back with his hands,
if that makes sense, and his legs were touching the wall,
so he was like curled up in like a little sea,
and then he opened his legs and just started going
ham on his dick swallowed it. Yeah, like straight not scorpi,
(28:07):
I guess like a backward scorpion. I guess yeah, yeah, yeah,
maybe I use the wrong term, but yeah, that homie.
Speaker 1 (28:15):
Well I know that, Like CAM is crazy though, because
I didn't hear a lot of shit on there. I
didn't done like a couple of shows and ship on there,
so I didn't I didn't see. But it never be
like cam to cam though, because a lot of people
be asked for that. But I'm like, I ain't trying
to have weird ship pop up on my face and ship.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Oh man, I've had the weird ship.
Speaker 1 (28:34):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (28:34):
That was That was a good quest that, like because
my voice, because that sound like a little girl. They're
asking it's called age play. They were like, do you
mind doing age play? And I was like, like, how
old am I supposed to be acting?
Speaker 2 (28:48):
And they're like, you know, like teenager. I was like,
that's when I go cussing them out.
Speaker 3 (28:52):
You fucking prob, you fucking proverb, you child molass, so
you fucking shit.
Speaker 4 (28:57):
I go in on them and then they log out
and I'm.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
Like, as long as I know, I feel like I
did myself, you're helping them, Uh should hush. I'm glad
I smoke before this because it makes so much better.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Smoking.
Speaker 1 (29:20):
I want you to give out all your all your
socials where people can find your information. Did you start
your your only fans like your your comedy stuff on there?
I did? I did?
Speaker 2 (29:31):
Yeah, everything like everything on all platforms.
Speaker 3 (29:35):
I'm Lona Arry's Comedy spelled l A N A C
h A I R e Z Comedy and that's on
all platforms. And if they want to see my my
Only Fans premium page, I'm on Lona Chary's Premium. So
you guys can follow me everywhere I'm on. I'm on Twitter,
I'm on Uh, I'm on Instagram, I'm on Only Fans,
(29:59):
I'm on tip Talk else YouTube, I'm on YouTube also,
so yeah, I mean they can follow me anyway they want.
And I have different content on all different platforms so
that it stays interesting.
Speaker 1 (30:10):
Cool cool. Make sure I put the link in there
in the BYO on this so people can make sure
it hit you up. Thank you for coming on you
You pretty much did everything, you know, but yeah, definitely
make sure I send this to you, and also yeah,
make sure we promote your podcast and get your stuff
(30:31):
really too. Thank you all right, happy Thanksgiving, Bye, take
care
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