November 27, 2023 • 44 mins
Today on Feminine Roadmap: Aligning your life with what your body needs with Katie Bramlett. Katie is the co-founder of We-Shape, a company that creates personalized workouts that meet you where you are. Today she talks about their mission to change how and why people exercise. The goal is to focus on why we move our bodies, to feel good, have energy, and connect with our body. Toxic diet culture focuses on external outcomes, pushing through, and a number on the scale. Switching from the should to connecting with the what feels fright for my body today is a key element in this philosophy. Fitness and nutrition is not a one size fits most paradigm, it’s individual and personal for each person. Katie encourages listeners to practice turning up the internal dial of self, listening to our bodies so we can connect with ourselves and move accordingly. When it comes to food, the goal is to create neutrality not judgement around food to avoid disordered eating patterns. As we question our narratives, the hope is that it will crack open the door just a little to let some new light in. When we find a way to feel safe enough to be open to making a change toward releasing beliefs about our identity we’ve held around diet and exercise, we can learn to connect to our body in a new way. There are so many nuggets of encouragement and wisdom in this conversation so grab a cuppa something wonderful and join us! Also, if you’re curious, here’s a free gift from Katie and her team https://www.weshape.com/feminineroadmap
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Episode Transcript
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(00:02):
Hi, Hi'm Gina forer are welcometo the Feminine Roadmap Podcast, a global
community of women in midlife. Wegather here weekly over a cup of something
wonderful for real talk, life changingstrategies and a big dose of sisterhood.
Now please sit back and enjoy.Hello, Feminine Roadmappers, Welcome back to
(00:28):
Feminine Roadmap Podcast, the podcast thathelps you navigate the challenges and the changes
of midlife and inspires you to livea more vibrant second half. Today.
If you find us on YouTube,please don't forget to ring that bells you
don't miss any more conversations, andif you are on a podcast platform,
please take the time to subscribe,rate, and share this conversation. Today
(00:51):
we're going to be talking about fitness, but we are going to turn it
on its head. My guest todayher mission is to change how and why
we exercise. She wants to focuson why we move our bodies, how
we move our bodies to feel good, have energy, connect with our body,
and she wants to break down thattoxic culture around fitness and the narratives
(01:15):
that don't really serve us. Sotoday I'm going to be talking to Katie
Bramlett. She is the co founderof We Shape. Katie, thank you
so much for being here today.Hi, thank you so much for having
me. It's my pleasure. Whydon't you give my audience a little background
as to why this is your missionand your message and what We Shape is
all about. Well, it actuallystarted long before We Shape. My co
(01:40):
founder and I used to run adigital fitness company. So we sold digital
products like cookbooks and diets and howto get a six pack. And I
often share that from the outside inmy life looked really great. I had
met a lot of milestones that societytold me I should meet. Our company
was scaling the ink five hundred threetimes, Like really, everything was sort
(02:02):
of set in terms of what Ithought I wanted my life to be.
But to be honest with you,there was something inside that just said,
no, this is not the way. And it was really hard to turn
the dial up on that voice becauseI was getting so much external validation for
the success and the thing that wewere helping people, right, we're helping
(02:23):
people get healthy, and I justwas like, ah, I can't,
I can't. I can't sit withit, I can't get settled in it.
So I just started to dissect whywhat's going on here? And so
fast forward the tape. I waslike, oh, I was asleep at
the wheel. I was promoting somethingthat maybe actually wasn't helping people and maybe
(02:43):
wasn't what was best for us asa culture. And once we started to
peel back those layers, everything changedand we ended up shutting that company down.
At the same time, my cofounder was really starting to I was
like getting fed up with the philosophicalmission side, and he was getting fed
up with the product side, Likethe products that we're offering are good,
(03:04):
but like, we need a productthat can meet people where they're at,
and we need a product that's rootedin exercise science and movement so that people
can have a sustainable exercise program forthe long haul. Like, no one's
going to ride an exercise bike forforty years. That doesn't actually really help
us for the long haul, Andso how do we create a product?
So we both kind of like we'regoing through this transformation at the same time
(03:24):
in different ways, and we navigatedall of the clunkiness to finally close down
the other company come together, andwe did have to go through a period
of like I want to go thisway and you want to go that way,
and I'm like, oh, actuallythey go together. And so with
that was the birth of We Shape. So we spent a couple years building
(03:45):
our technology driven product that's at home, extremely customizable workouts that are rooted in
movement. People can adjust the movementsin real time to meet their needs,
and we started dissecting some of thistoxic culture. So yeah, it was,
it was. It's been a journey, but we finally landed on the
same page and I'm super grateful forthat. Yeah, so what would have
(04:08):
been the different what's the main differencebetween what you used to do and what
you do now. So we usedto sell people weight loss, which is
really rooted in like fear of notfitting in, fear of not getting love,
fear of not being accepted, fearof if I don't meet this particular
body type, I will be rejected. We used to sell like like do
(04:31):
this for thirty days and then youcould get you could get apps, and
I'm like, why do we wantapps? Like there? It was just
so surface level. It was justso like contributing to the problem. We
didn't know it at the time.So I did go through a huge period
of like shame and guilt and like, oh no, what have I done?
I was like, well, youdidn't know. You did what you
thought you knew at the time,and then you knew better, and then
you did better. What we donow is we're like, okay, what
(04:55):
does your body need. Oh,you have a hurt shoulder, you have
a hurt knee, you have uhor you have a movement pattern that's going
to turn into an injury. Andwe do at home body weight exercises that
are like we like, behind thescenes, it's very complicated. We have
thousands of movement files, but forthe for the customer, it's pretty easy.
They just push play and the programdesign is made for their body.
(05:16):
So we're trying to get people tomove better in their body right, and
the moving better makes you actually feelbetter. So we're like shifting the entire
intention as to why we're doing something. We're not really here to get a
six pack, app like, we'renot really here to focus on weight loss.
Some people come to us use ourproduct and sometimes they lose weight,
(05:36):
but that's not like why we're here. Like, great, if that's what
you want, that's a side effect, wonderful, but We're not going to
put all of our energy and intentiononto it because what does it really do
anyway, Like, what does that? I mean, it doesn't really serve
us. In fact, in ourold company, we really used to talk
about body transformation and we had thousandsof people have body transformations, and guess
(05:58):
what, they were all still miserable. So it's like this idea of if
we do this, then this it'sfake. It's not even real. And
I intentionally even have people on ourpodcasts that are like ex fitness models,
bikini model, and they at thepeak of their quote unquote you know success
or what we think would would bringlike happiness, they literally all say the
(06:19):
same thing. I was miserable.My mental state was in the garbage.
I had no social life, likethey were miserable. And so I'm trying
to expose this idea that like whatwe think will make us happy, oh
that number will make me feel goodabout myself is actually false and if you
get it, it's only short lived. So it's like a vastly different world
(06:43):
that we've opened our company up to. That's really interesting because I think the
general conversation in the world is reallyrooted in that isn't it Like this is
what is valuable, This is whatmakes you valuable, and if you don't
look and feel this way or appearto the world this way, then somehow
(07:06):
you're deficient. M Yeah, youknow. About three years ago I worked
with this therapist too. I hadbeen working with this other therapist for a
long time and she was really great. She really spoke to my analytical,
data driven mind. And I cameto a point in my work with her
where I was like, I needto find someone who makes me a little
(07:27):
bit more uncomfortable. So I foundthis other therapist. She made me really
uncomfortable. She really wanted to likeacknowledge my inner child and like hold a
lot of space for me and cryfor me. And I was like,
oh, okay, I have togo here because I feel discomfort and I'll
never forget. Like after working withher for a few months, she came
to me and she said, Ijust want to acknowledge something because I'm not
sure you know this. And Iwas like, Okay, what she said,
(07:47):
you know that you're valuable and worthywithout doing anything right, Like you
don't have to be a good mom, you don't have to U you don't
have to have a successful business.You don't have to have achievement, you
don't have to be efficient, youdon't you don't have to do anything,
and you just your existence as ahuman being validates that you're worthy. And
I was like, come again,I didn't quite get it, but that
(08:11):
was because I was just living ina system that told me something so different
that I had to start to learnwith that what that meant mm hmm.
It's a paradigm shift, really huge, huge, but it's so valuable.
And so if we can get people. A lot of people come in and
they're like, Okay, I wantmy at home workout. Great, I
super customizable, as is what Ineed. It's like, you know,
(08:35):
a great alternative to a personal trainerthat's more affordable. And then I go
and surprise, We're going to actuallyalso help you think about your body and
connect with your body and care foryourself in a very different way. It's
something different to what you're talking about. It's almost like you're disembodied, right,
(08:56):
You're you're over here treating your bodyas something that needs to look a
certain way or fixed. Yes,right, like it's broken. So you
have this distance between you and yourbody and it sounds like what you're doing
is you're actually connecting those dots forpeople so that they're much more connected and
enjoying the process of what they're goingthrough because it has a greater purpose than
(09:22):
just quote looking good, losing thatten pounds for your reunion or whatever it
is we as women will tend todo. Absolutely. Do you guys get
involved with the food side of itas well? Do you have nutrition advice
and that sort of thing. Well, I mean it is inevitable in some
ways, right that Like when you'rewhen you have an exercise product or movement
(09:46):
product, people always want to talkabout diets. So we do not do
any diets. We're a bit antidiet over here. We respect people who
feel like that's the path for them, right. I think the premise of
our community and our brand is reallynot judgment, like really like offering self
kindness and self acceptance for ourselves andfor one another. But we do have
(10:07):
like educational resources and I do bringyou know, various experts on our podcast
to shed light into a lot ofthe food stuff. But no, we
don't. We don't prescribe it.It's it's even funny on the exercise side.
People will come in and say,well, how many days a week
should I work out? I'm like, I don't know your body, Like
what do you think your body needs? And people are just like dumbfounded by
(10:28):
that, and my co founders likejust give them an answer, like I
don't I'm not their body. Likea couple of days, I don't know,
right. It's like it's like Ihave lived personally in my life up
until a couple of years ago,where like my my head was attached to
my body, but there was nocommunication happening between those two things. It
was like my mind was in thedriver's seat, my body was just having
(10:50):
to They were it was trying sohard, I'm tired, don't do that.
Why are you doing this to me? And it was like, sorry,
the external dial is so loud,I can't listen to you. And
so what we're really trying to dois bring people back to that space of
like how do we turn up thatinternal dial of self that helps you create
that path. So it's a longway to answer, but no, we
(11:13):
don't prescribe diets. I just tryto provide educational resources for different perspectives that
we can have about our relationship.With food. Mm so again not diet.
It's nutrition number one. It's fuelfor the body that you're getting to
know again or maybe for the firsttime. I think for some people this
(11:33):
is a relationship maybe they've never hadof listening to their body many times,
and so you know, I dohave a lot of like you would call
intuitive eating experts. Come on.I think what it really is, though,
is like learning how to create neutralityand non judgment around food. I
think that's a really difficult thing,right, It's like and we all do
(11:56):
it, myself included, Like whenI look back on myself three years ago,
I was like, oh oh,I got the amount of restrictions that
I had on myself was just disorderedeating is what it was. It was
like, that is just not away to live. So approaching food from
a different perspective around like food isfood, right, Like some foods that
we consider good and healthy, LikeI love the example of broccoli because it's
(12:18):
like, Okay, that might workfor you, but what if that gives
me a stomach ache? Right?So now all of a sudden, what
is the label for that as agood? Still? So thinking about food
from a more neutral perspective and thinkingabout food from like, how do I
connect with that food in a differentway? And then when I do go
out with a friend or go outto dinner or have the have make a
cake at home or whatever it is, how do I then also create non
(12:41):
judgment around that and keep the neutralityaround those foods as well. Right,
Like I enjoyed that, maybe Itake information from it. Oh I had
three slices of that and I feltnauseous for two hours. Okay, I
didn't like that feeling. But I'mnot making an adjustment based on a judgment.
I'm making an adjustment based off anobservation of a communication that my body
is giving me, And those arevery different intentions. It's interesting to actually
(13:07):
pay attention to how you feel afteryou eat certain things. It's interesting because
your body is telling you. Butsomething Katie, that I think is maybe
not recognized is if we have beenliving unhealthy in our thoughts, unhealthy in
our food habits, healthy in ourmovement patterns, it takes a while to
(13:28):
build that relationship with your body andwith your mind and with your food in
a healthy way. In other words, somebody feeling their body and being in
tune with their body is a practiceat first, because I was talking to
someone about you know, if you'redoing something it could be food, it
could be exercise, and your bodygets attuned to that level of diet nutrition,
(13:54):
or it gets used to that kindof fitness, and you're used to
not feeling good. Right, You'rekind of of this is normal when actually
you're you would say, well,that's actually not normal. It might be
common, but it's not normal.And so how would you encourage someone who
has never learned to listen to theirbody? What do they look out for
(14:16):
and how do they begin to shifttheir attention, like you said, from
that disembodied like head and body aretwo separate entities, and beginning to create
that relationship so that they're more wholein the way they approach these things.
I would say curiosity is the firststep, and sometimes it's really the only
Like I always talk about this conceptof cracking the door to curiosity. You
(14:39):
don't have to swing it right openand change your beliefs overnight, but if
you can crack it, sometimes it'senough for just a little bit of that
light to come in and then whenyou kind of see things a little bit
differently from that, from that justthat peak of light coming in. It's
often enough momentum to just have thingsunfold. And I'll speak to an example
of like I used to be superrestrictive. I used to only eat certain
(15:03):
things, blah blah blah blah blah, and like, yeah, my body
liked it. Right, We couldargue that my body did like that.
However, I was suffering emotionally andenergetically, and I had no idea that
I was. So. I mighthave had good digestion and energy and no
real health problems, but I wassuffering in a different way that we can't
(15:26):
measure but does have an impact.Like energetically, I was deeply suffering.
But when I cracked that door tocuriosity and said, I wonder if what
I'm doing is really serving me.I wonder if I should base this more
just than just on how my digestionworks. And I started going, oh
my god, look at how muchtime, look at how much energy,
look at how much of your lifeyou're giving to this, And as a
(15:48):
result, you have to give upall these other things because you're only one
person with so much time and energyin the day. And so But it
was that cracking that door and forinstance, I'm in the middle of life
listening to a book called food Isn'tMedicine? That book. If someone would
have given me that book three yearsago, I would have gone off on
twenty different scientific resources as to whythat's not true just that title alone,
(16:11):
without even I wouldn't have even consideredreading that book. That doesn't That doesn't
validate my narrative. But because Iwas able to crack that door to curiosity
and get curious about I think thisis serving me. But let me just
double check. I went down acompletely different path. Hm. And what
was the concept of that particular book. I haven't finished it. I'm in
(16:34):
the middle of it, but it'sjust sort of like there's a lot of
misconceptions around. It's like we thepremise is that we attribute weight loss to
a certain weight being healthy, butthere are a million other factors that contribute
to someone feeling healthy in their body, and weight is not the number one.
That's a great conversation, isn't it. As women, we have really
(16:57):
and even my myself being periman apuzzle and having gone through quite a bit.
And it was all happening before thequarantine, during the quarantine, taking
care of my mother in law,her body failing and all of these stress
induced types of things. And Ithink that's a conversation around there are seasons
(17:19):
that our bodies go through and whatmight work for twenty thirty years. In
my case, I didn't change anything, but my body definitely did. My
weight changed for the first time inmy life other than pregnancy, And it's
like, what is happening? AndI think if our heads aren't on straight,
(17:41):
it's really disruptive, like to yourpoint, mentally and emotionally, psychologically,
when we are identified by that sortof thing, like our body looking
a certain way, and I'm definitelyone and that growing up there was a
(18:02):
lot of attention on how I looked. I happened to be slim, but
I didn't necessarily like the attention,and so it became a little dysmorphic for
me. And so I think thatwhen we're so strongly identified with this physical
casement that we have, we getlost in who we are. Is what
(18:23):
I hear you saying, there's thatwho I am, not how I look.
That really drives that mental and emotionaland physical health. Am I right?
Yeah? And think about it thisway too. It's like if I
identify my worth with how I receivevalidation for that, for my body or
(18:45):
for my looks, then I'm goingto continue to cling to that narrative even
more. And that is a scaryslippery slope because we don't I mean,
we're all going to age and we'reall going to get older, and so
I want to warn people of thatbecause that is a really, like I
said, slippery slope to get yourentire identity wrapped up in. And I
(19:06):
think about just the concept of that'snot really your true self anyway. And
if we can start to go backto what does that internal dial of self
really want, really need, reallysay, then that can start to reflect
on the outside. So like myold narrative was really wrapped in eat this
way and do this and get thesuccessful business and do this thing. So
(19:27):
my external narrative that was validating thatmatched. I had to go through a
transition where that external narrative had toswitch because it's not healthy for me to
be in this position inside going oh, I don't like it, and then
like still participating in that right like, and that is a very intense transition.
(19:47):
Sometimes I lost some friends. Iyou know, I definitely don't consume
the same content that I used tolike it was a transition, but I
think that if we can, wecan stand strong in that internal self.
I think that that is how wecan kind of pave our path through it
because and it does take practice toturn that dial up, right, We're
(20:11):
that dial's almost talked out of usas we as we get as we grow
up. But I feel like ifwe can stay grounded in that, and
I do feel grateful for that throughoutmy whole experience, even though I was
getting so much validation from the outsideabout my business and about this and about
that, that internal voice was likeno, no, no, and I
was like why why. But gettingcurious allowed me to say, oh,
(20:34):
that's why you didn't feel okay aboutthat, and that's okay, you can
go on this path now. Butstaying true to self is it sounds sort
of like silly and cliche, butit really, to me is the most
important thing. Mm hmmm. Theexistential part of it is I think for
some women it's knowing who they actuallyare. They need to be curious about
(20:55):
who they actually are and what theyactually value versus the dialogue that's in their
head. Like do I even agreewith this well, because people who identify
as female are often placed into roleswithout being asked if they wanted to be
there in the first place. Right, So, I mean, I'm sure
many people can consit in that andgo did I want that? Did I
(21:17):
like that? Who am? I? I think that it's it's you know,
the culture that we live in,unfortunately, has put a lot of
those expectations and roles on women.And I think it is okay to say,
you know what, even though Ilived that way for fifty years or
sixty years, it's okay for meto stop and do a check in and
really start dissecting was that the pathI really wanted to be. I just
(21:37):
don't believe it's ever too late todo that. I will say that it
can be hard for people who arein your life when you do that,
but doesn't mean it's not a reasonto still do it. Yeah, that's
definitely a midlife journey for a lotof people. Have you know. I'm
in my sixth year of this podcast, and I've talked to hundreds of people,
and the reality is that we dohave seasons of life where those roles
(22:04):
have a place and they make sensefor certain seasons of our lives. And
there's nothing bad or wrong about alot of the roles that we play.
The problem is, to your point, we reach a point in our lives
where it does need to be evaluated. Does this serve me? Is this
(22:26):
something I want to continue to do? Something I want to continue to be
because we change our situations and circumstanceschange. You know, growth is to
your point, sometimes the cost ofgrowth is the people around you don't like
it. M That is one ofthe hardest things. For sure. I
(22:48):
would say that I've had to warnsome people that have you know, we've
had a part ways and that isthat is really hard. And I will
say though, that the other sideof that, like, nothing has ever
felt as good to me as likefollowing that voice inside and having that inner
sense of knowing and strengthening that voice. Nothing feels the same, Nothing feels
(23:10):
the same after that mm hm.And you just practice that, and you
just build the reps, and I'mnowhere near that voice being turned up all
the way. I think that's actuallya lifelong journey. But you know the
feeling when that feels right, weall know that embodied feeling. Ooh,
that feels right. And then whatwe do is we get back in our
head and we go but this andthat, but this and that. I
can't do that, ha ha,right, Yes, one of the things
(23:32):
all shared that I did. Honestly, I think the thing that actually really
started me on this as I startedworking with an energy worker who did nervous
system work, because I didn't evenfeel safe to have that thought like are
you are? Like I didn't evenmy body didn't even feel safe to be
like do you like that? Doyou not like that? Like, like,
I didn't even feel safe enough todo that in my own nervous system.
(23:52):
So I don't know if you've everheard of network spinal analysis. No,
it's like a form of chiropractic,but they don't do any man all
adjustments. I feel like it's nervoussystem work. It like works on regulating
and grounding and making your nervous systemfeel safe so that you can be the
true expression of who you are.Right. A lot of times I think
we're unaware that we're making these decisionsin our life and participating in behaviors out
(24:15):
of safety. And no one canget curious if they don't feel safe.
True, So I think that wasHonestly, the very very very first step
for me was like, how doI get safe in this nervous system.
It doesn't have to be network finalanalysis. I was just I had recognized
that I was really wound up andI didn't even feel safe to ask myself
certain questions, and I needed tofigure out a way to get that safety
(24:37):
before I could really go down thatpath. It's like the nervous system was
disregulated. It was set to thewrong thing. Yeah, yeah, super
disregulated. And it was like,oh, I'm doing that, and now
I can look back and go,oh, you did that out of fear.
Oh you did that out of conditioning. Oh you did that out of
anxiety. Right, I can kindof look back and see a lot of
(24:57):
my life's decisions, none of andwe're like, oh, you did that
out of like safety and security andintuition some things. It wasn't like it's
not black and white, but alot of things were like fear, anxiety,
conditioning. That's not that's not yourtrue self, that's dysregulation. Right.
(25:18):
Yeah. The thing about growth isbecause growth is uncomfortable for us when
we face these things and we questionthese things, that causes discomfort for other
people, and I think that's wherethose relationships began to break down, because
we've really disrupted not just our ownlife, but it's like dropping a pebble
(25:41):
in water. There's ripples that goout and it disrupts other people's nervous systems
too, you know, and maybemaybe that ripple will move them in that
curiosity direction. But I think aswe approach a shift in our mindset to
(26:02):
your point, it takes time toturn up that dial. And it is
a lifelong journey. It's not aone and done. We will find ourselves
in situations and in relationships that willmaybe woo us back to that place to
fit in or to feel comfortable oryeah, that's being a human being.
Like I find myself all the timegoing, oh you did that yesterday.
Okay, that didn't come from intuition, that came from anxiety. Right.
(26:26):
That's what I mean is I don'tknow that it ever goes away, right,
But if people can come to weshape and like learn how to connect
with their body in a new way, I'm hoping to just crack that door
to curiosity. Like that's really whatwe're trying to do here, is like,
Okay, come for the workout,and let's also talk about some of
these other things, and we hopethat the workout facilitates a new connection with
your body that you haven't had before, and then that can maybe open the
(26:48):
door to, you know, figuringout if that connection with self is as
aligned to somebody wants. It's reallyonly everybody's decision how what alignment, to
what degree of that alignment they want. Speaking more to what you said about
the people getting uncomfortable in my life, I mean, I like to use
this analogy of like, okay,like let's say you and I are best
friends and for twenty years we've donethis tango dance together, and then I've
(27:11):
discovered this thing about myself or thesethings about myself, and I'm learning about
myself in a way I haven't learned, and I'm realizing that I actually kind
of like the waltz, like thatfits me, that suits me better,
that feels more true to who Iam. It's like you, as my
friend, get to say, ohmy god, can you teach me that
dance that I've never seen a dancelike that? Or you're stepping all over
(27:32):
my feet. I don't like this, and I gotta go, and that
can be painful, but it doesn'tmean I'm not supposed to be doing the
waltz. It's not a message justnot to stay true to you. It's
just a message that that person's ona different path and they're not ready for
that dance, and that's okay.Yeah, I think that was a profound
statement. You know, just becausesomeone else doesn't approve of the path you're
(27:56):
on doesn't mean that you're on thewrong journey. I think that's a maturing
process in our emotional state. Ohabsolutely. I still sometimes I'm like,
oh, why do I care whatthat person said? Why do I am
like, oh, fear anxiety conditioning. I want validation, I want to
know I'm worth it, right.But I think if we practice that inner
(28:19):
knowing, that inner trust that,and we continue just to stay curious,
we could continue to cultivate a communityof people around us. This is why
I actually incorporated. So we launchedour product and then I was like,
we have to launch a community elementto our products because I can't ask people
to like just you know, throwaway toxic weight loss culture and not worry
about that like that, They're like, what what are you doing? Right?
(28:41):
Well, we need people to supporteach other during this journey because they're
going to come hear our message anddo a work out with us and connect
with our body in a new way, and then they're going to go back
into the world and they're going tobe like, take that, do this
diet, and you only valuable ifyou lose twenty pounds before you're saying it's
like, okay, we gotta wegotta offer canmmunity support. So we actually
do have daily zoom calls where weall get together we talk about, like
(29:04):
you know, our journey in wellnessand dissecting some of these messages and the
challenges that come with that. SoI really want to emphasize how important finding
your community is. It's okay ifyou don't want to do the salsa anymore.
It's okay if you're going to dothe waltz. Now there are plenty
of people in this world who arealso doing that same dance. I think
(29:25):
we find new parts of ourselves toowhen we make these changes that you didn't
even know about. Absolutely absolutely,you know, fitness does really change for
me. I've learned through different guests, is your body's changing, and this
is something to think about. Whereis your state of being in this moment,
(29:48):
what is your you know, like, where are your hormones at,
what's happening in your life, where'syour cortisol level? Like are you in
a like taking care of my motherin law? That was there were a
lot of reasons that that season oftwo and a half years was very stressful.
There were times when it probably wasn't, but the overall impact was really
(30:10):
strong. So I think, likeanything, there's a journey of awareness of
figuring out the whole picture of whatwe're experiencing and why we're experiencing it,
and how we're engaging with that elementof our lives. And I think body
movement is a way to move emotionsthrough the body, to move the cord
(30:38):
us all out, Like it canliterally be movement of the body. Let's
take exercise out of the conversation.And I'm just saying thinking about it differently,
Okay, is it exercise? Itcould be, But how about using
our bodies and partnering with ourselves tomove move these things through so that they
(31:00):
don't get stuck inside of us?You know, using it in that way
movement is really powerful as well.Oh absolutely, I'm like, we're a
culture that's fixated on exercise and loseweight, and I'm like, but what
about all the other things that movementdoes? Like I the other day,
I you worked out with a friendand then I was like, oh my
(31:21):
god, I have double the energythat I did yesterday. I'm like,
I wonder why. Like it,We're just so it's like we don't even
think about those things right, like, oh, my anxiety seems down.
Oh I was really processing some griefand that helped me process that grief.
Like we don't. There's like amillion other things that movement does for us,
and our culture is stuck on thelike, well, what does a
scale say? It just I eventuallyI actually got rid of all the scales
(31:42):
in my house. I recycled them. I was like, they're not even
allowed in here. I'm not goingto have two daughters growing up in a
home where we're looking at that numberand finding meaning and value behind it.
I just couldn't do it anymore.And but yeah, the amount the benefits
of movement, and that's why wedeveloped the product that we did, because
what I do today for movement mightbe need to be different tomorrow, Like
maybe I don't sleep well tonight maybeI'm like feeling more anxious to like,
(32:07):
I don't know. And so ourproduct allows this interactive piece where you can
say, oh, scale that movementdown. And we're coming and saying the
opposite of what most of us haveheard, which is, you know,
a lot of the products out therelike you know, push through and no
pay, no gain, and we'relike, whoa, whoa, whoa,
listen to your body. You didn'tsleep, You shouldn't be doing an intense
workout to keep it more mellow.Scale down, and so we're trying to
(32:30):
get people to like even just youexercise and movement in a very different way.
It's We're not going to like doone one exercise program for the rest
of our lives like that. That'snot how it works. It's like,
maybe for two months, my back'sbeen bothering me and I'm doing a lot
of like really mindful movement, andmaybe this other season, I have a
lot of anxiety, so I'm actuallyneeding to work my body a little harder
(32:52):
just to kind of move some ofthat anxiety through. But there's no prescription.
That's why when people come in andthey say what do I do?
I mean, I will sometimes belike, you know, if people say
I haven't worked out in years andI really want to, I will sometimes
say we'll start with one day aweek, don't be cause you know,
then people do the thing where theydo seven days and then they get burnt
out, Like, no, don'tdo that. Maybe start with one day.
(33:12):
But this is not about we're notrobots, we're not We're humans.
We're human beings. We need tolike understand that it's complicated and layered and
what may work for one person doesn'twork for another. And that's kind of
like also the root of our ofour product is meeting people where their body
needs. And what your body needstoday maybe different than what it needs in
a week or a month, andthat's okay, it's exactly that's the point
(33:36):
that that's being a human being.Yeah, and that's really wise information and
wise advice to recognize that what yourbody has needed or has worked can change.
Yeah, And I think that's importantto my point about like perimenopause.
One of the things that I've learnedis you have a body style and the
(33:59):
time of day and the type ofexercise really impacts the body. We're dealing
with. Cortisol is now the motivation. Yeah, in our bodies, like
how do we navigate the cortisol?Well, if you do this kind of
workout and you do it in themorning and it's not your body style,
you raise your cortisol, you've putstress on your body. And so I
(34:21):
think the idea that exercise is notjust running and lifting heavy weights, and
you know, grinding is such ahealthy and helpful way to make a shift
in our thinking. It's like,what is exercise specifically? You know?
Absolutely yeah, And we're saying movementover exercise. I'm not saying you're going
(34:45):
to come to us and not geta good workout. We can give you
any kind of workout you want.In fact, when our head trainer was
filming all the videos, I feltreally bad for him the last couple of
days. So I'm not sometimes peoplecoming up it's going to be too easy.
I'm like, it's actually going tobe whatever your body needs. So
we can take someone who's coming froma physical therapy office all the way to
a professional athlete. Don't worry somuch about that. Let's try to tap
(35:07):
in and see what your body needstoday. And it was reminding me like
I was actually had dinner with afriend last night and she was like,
you know, a couple months ago, I for whatever reason, wanted to
do a half marathon. So Istarted running and I was like, oh,
okay, that sounds nice. Andthen she was like and then two
weeks into this training program, Iwas doing my hip hurt and I said,
oh, what did you do?She goes, I said, I'm
not doing that anymore, and Isaid, you know what, that is
(35:28):
incredible because if the way that ourculture supports that narrative is had you push
through and you did it, andyou were in pain and you were miserable,
but everyone would have been like,nice job pushing through, you know.
I'm like, I'm actually want tolike really acknowledge and give you validation
and listening to your body and stoppingbecause your body did not like that you
were getting hurt and and and that'swhat I'm trying to say, Like we
(35:52):
were made to believe in this fitnessculture that just pushing through and doing that's
that your body might not want.That. Now, that's very different than
throw the baby out with the bathwater and never move I'm like, I
do believe the human body needs movement. Yeah, absolutely, And I have
really been trying to tap in specificallylately with myself. Like when I go,
oh, my body doesn't feel likedoing that workout, I go,
(36:13):
Okay, does it not? Doesit not want to do it? Or
does it just want to like dosomething that's a little bit easier and needs
more rest like recovery. And that'sa fine line too, right, because
our brain can people can also gothe other direction. So I'm like,
we got to get in tune withthe with knowing ourselves and knowing when I'm
like, oh, yeah, mybody's saying it doesn't want that, but
(36:35):
it actually needs that because I havea lot of anxious energy in my body
right now, so I need toI need to listen to that anxious energy.
Right It's it's it's layered, it'scomplicated, there's and this is why
when people come and they want theprescription, I'm like, I can't give
you the prescription. I can.I can offer you support. I can
I can connect you with community memberswho have dealt with the same thing.
We can talk about our experiences.But it's not my job to say this
(36:59):
is the diet you should be onand this is the thing you should do.
And I just want to provide thetools and the resources and the support
to do what you think is bestfor you. And I love how you
pointed out earlier that it's not likeone prescription for the rest of your life.
It could be you know, there'sthose people who run. They love
to run. Running is their jamand they've done it for forty years or
whatever. But it's the idea ofyou know, broadening our perspective on what
(37:24):
movement feels good and maybe trying somethingdifferent, maybe something that doesn't isn't as
measurable because you know, when you'redoing reps, you can count them.
You're doing steps, you can countthem. Yeah, but like if you're
doing well and yoga, you cando it by the progress that you make.
But sometimes something like just moving yourbody to music absolutely is a great
(37:49):
way to move your body, butyou can't measure that sort of thing.
And I think we're used to metricsas a way of knowing that we've quote
done a good job absolutely, andyou know, we don't do like the
badges and the rewards and uh,we don't do that here. We have
a monthly feel good score where wecheck in to see how is your sleep,
how's your self confidence, how muchenergy do you have? Are you
(38:12):
in pain? And we kind oflook at those things. It is funny,
like I'm constantly doing this delicate balanceand product with like people wanting certain
things and me kind of having aphilosophical stance on like I don't really want
to do that. Yeah, soI'm like, Okay, people want to
look at something on their dashboard,you can let us know how you're feeling
in your body this month. ButI'm not really here to like have confetti
(38:32):
go off when you did your hundredthworkout in a short It's like, this
is not the purpose of this product. The purpose of this product is for
you to move and feel good inyour body and not to that alone says
why I can't do that all thetime, which is a gentle it's a
gentle mentorship sort of Really. Yeah, I'm accepting of whatever anybody needs,
(39:00):
whatever path I am. I'm like, you're at that part of your path,
great, I'm gonna offer this,right, I'm gonna offer this.
And you know, I do wakeup every day and I thank the greater
forces out there for the UH forproviding for we shape because it has been
a struggle to be in a startupenvironment and to go against the grain,
(39:20):
right, Like when you go toan investor and you're like, well,
we're not focusing on weight loss andwe're not promising anything with their body,
They're like, wait, what howare you selling that? So you know,
I first thank the universe for justthe opportunity for continuously providing, and
then second I say, bring mepeople who are ready for we shape.
It's not my job to convince peopleto unsubscribe from toxic diet and exercise culture.
(39:42):
Like, if you're ready, let'sdo it. Let's go together,
Let's be on this path, let'suncover, let's connect with ourselves in a
way we haven't, but I don't. I've discovered that I really don't want
to spend my energy and time inlife away from my kids here at this
company convincing people otherwise. Like,if you're crack the door to curiosity and
you want to experience a new way, Hey, we're here for you.
Let's let's talk about it. Yeahthat's fantastic. So if you had to
(40:06):
give the listeners, you know,three takeaways, three things you want them
to anchor into. What would thosebe get? Curious things that you think
serve, you might not actually beserving. You get community right, So
as you uncover things about yourself thatyou feel are shifting, find the community
(40:29):
who supports that, and it's okayif people don't like you can keep going
on your path even if other peopledon't like it. And then just from
the exercise perspective, like focus onhow your body moves, focus on how
your body feels, and it's okayto unsubscribe from all of the messages around.
You need to be this way inorder to feel worthy and validate it.
(40:51):
It's simply not true. Fantastic,Okatie. How can people find you
and we Shape? They can actuallyhave a special link for your listeners if
they want to give we Shape atry for free for two weeks, they
can go to we shape dot comforward slash Feminine Roadmap for their two week
free trial. We're on all socialplatforms. We have two social handles.
(41:13):
You can find us at we shape, which is all movement related content,
and then we have at we ShapePodcasts, which is all content around this
toxic diet and exercise culture that we'vebeen speaking about today. Fantastic, Well,
Katie, I want to thank youso much for taking the time to
be on my show today and toshare your passion around helping people become more
(41:35):
healthy in their relationship with themselves.And it's all around that acceptance, that
grace, that kindness, that reallybeing truly content and happy in the state
that we're in. And I reallyappreciate you bringing that gentleness and that encouragement
that if you are ready to havethis, that there you are offering something
(41:58):
that's going to not make them feelbad, it's going to make them feel
good and right in their bodies.So thank you so much for stepping out,
going against the grain and creating somethingthat is going to help people become
more whole as a mind, body, and a spirit, not just a
number on the scale. Thank youso much, Gin, I really appreciate
the opportunity fantastic friends today. Ifyou find us on YouTube, you can
(42:22):
just look down below. I willhave the links there for you. If
you happen to be driving, youcan head to www. Dot Feminine roadmap
dot com. Forward Slash episode threefour seven and the links will be there.
This conversation today is hopefully going tobe a springboard for you to investigate
(42:43):
how you approach the way that youtreat your body when it comes to nutrition,
when it comes to movement, andencouraging us as women to change the
conversation about how we look and whatthe value of that is. And I
think it's an important on going conversationbecause it's so deeply rooted in who we
(43:04):
are to look a certain way,to weigh a certain thing, and this
is good, this is bad,this is right, this is wrong.
So today the conversation just is toencourage you to step back and evaluate,
be curious about whether or not thoseideas, those judgments, if you will,
are actually serving you anymore, andnot even judging that you've lived that
(43:27):
way possibly your whole life, butjust really saying, what else can I
do and how else can I feelgood? In this body? This is
carrying us through life. It's carryingour emotions, it's carrying our experiences,
it's carrying everything. How can wepartner with it, listen to it,
love it, and have a healthier, happier, more balanced life and remove
(43:51):
ourselves from the things that put thatpower in other people's hands, like how
I look. So friends, weencourage you to tap into we shape.
Like Katie said, we have anoffer for you if you just head to
like I said down below on YouTubeor to episode three four seven on Feminine
roadmap dot com. Check that out. See if make that part of the
(44:15):
door to curiosity. See if thisis something that you're ready for right now
to make that shift. I thankyou for being with us today for listening
in on this conversation. I doencourage you to share this with your friends
because this would be a great wayto build a healthier and happier community around
ourselves. Thank you so much forbeing here today. I look forward to
(44:36):
sharing more interesting people, important strategies, and empowering conversations with you in the
weeks to come. Take care ofmy friends. Bye bye,
Hi, Hi'm Gina forer are welcometo the Feminine Roadmap Podcast, a global
community of women in midlife. Wegather here weekly over a cup of something
wonderful for real talk, life changingstrategies and a big dose of sisterhood.
Now please sit back and enjoy.Hello, Feminine Roadmappers, Welcome back to
(00:28):
Feminine Roadmap Podcast, the podcast thathelps you navigate the challenges and the changes
of midlife and inspires you to livea more vibrant second half. Today.
If you find us on YouTube,please don't forget to ring that bells you
don't miss any more conversations, andif you are on a podcast platform,
please take the time to subscribe,rate, and share this conversation. Today
(00:51):
we're going to be talking about fitness, but we are going to turn it
on its head. My guest todayher mission is to change how and why
we exercise. She wants to focuson why we move our bodies, how
we move our bodies to feel good, have energy, connect with our body,
and she wants to break down thattoxic culture around fitness and the narratives
(01:15):
that don't really serve us. Sotoday I'm going to be talking to Katie
Bramlett. She is the co founderof We Shape. Katie, thank you
so much for being here today.Hi, thank you so much for having
me. It's my pleasure. Whydon't you give my audience a little background
as to why this is your missionand your message and what We Shape is
all about. Well, it actuallystarted long before We Shape. My co
(01:40):
founder and I used to run adigital fitness company. So we sold digital
products like cookbooks and diets and howto get a six pack. And I
often share that from the outside inmy life looked really great. I had
met a lot of milestones that societytold me I should meet. Our company
was scaling the ink five hundred threetimes, Like really, everything was sort
(02:02):
of set in terms of what Ithought I wanted my life to be.
But to be honest with you,there was something inside that just said,
no, this is not the way. And it was really hard to turn
the dial up on that voice becauseI was getting so much external validation for
the success and the thing that wewere helping people, right, we're helping
(02:23):
people get healthy, and I justwas like, ah, I can't,
I can't. I can't sit withit, I can't get settled in it.
So I just started to dissect whywhat's going on here? And so
fast forward the tape. I waslike, oh, I was asleep at
the wheel. I was promoting somethingthat maybe actually wasn't helping people and maybe
(02:43):
wasn't what was best for us asa culture. And once we started to
peel back those layers, everything changedand we ended up shutting that company down.
At the same time, my cofounder was really starting to I was
like getting fed up with the philosophicalmission side, and he was getting fed
up with the product side, Likethe products that we're offering are good,
(03:04):
but like, we need a productthat can meet people where they're at,
and we need a product that's rootedin exercise science and movement so that people
can have a sustainable exercise program forthe long haul. Like, no one's
going to ride an exercise bike forforty years. That doesn't actually really help
us for the long haul, Andso how do we create a product?
So we both kind of like we'regoing through this transformation at the same time
(03:24):
in different ways, and we navigatedall of the clunkiness to finally close down
the other company come together, andwe did have to go through a period
of like I want to go thisway and you want to go that way,
and I'm like, oh, actuallythey go together. And so with
that was the birth of We Shape. So we spent a couple years building
(03:45):
our technology driven product that's at home, extremely customizable workouts that are rooted in
movement. People can adjust the movementsin real time to meet their needs,
and we started dissecting some of thistoxic culture. So yeah, it was,
it was. It's been a journey, but we finally landed on the
same page and I'm super grateful forthat. Yeah, so what would have
(04:08):
been the different what's the main differencebetween what you used to do and what
you do now. So we usedto sell people weight loss, which is
really rooted in like fear of notfitting in, fear of not getting love,
fear of not being accepted, fearof if I don't meet this particular
body type, I will be rejected. We used to sell like like do
(04:31):
this for thirty days and then youcould get you could get apps, and
I'm like, why do we wantapps? Like there? It was just
so surface level. It was justso like contributing to the problem. We
didn't know it at the time.So I did go through a huge period
of like shame and guilt and like, oh no, what have I done?
I was like, well, youdidn't know. You did what you
thought you knew at the time,and then you knew better, and then
you did better. What we donow is we're like, okay, what
(04:55):
does your body need. Oh,you have a hurt shoulder, you have
a hurt knee, you have uhor you have a movement pattern that's going
to turn into an injury. Andwe do at home body weight exercises that
are like we like, behind thescenes, it's very complicated. We have
thousands of movement files, but forthe for the customer, it's pretty easy.
They just push play and the programdesign is made for their body.
(05:16):
So we're trying to get people tomove better in their body right, and
the moving better makes you actually feelbetter. So we're like shifting the entire
intention as to why we're doing something. We're not really here to get a
six pack, app like, we'renot really here to focus on weight loss.
Some people come to us use ourproduct and sometimes they lose weight,
(05:36):
but that's not like why we're here. Like, great, if that's what
you want, that's a side effect, wonderful, but We're not going to
put all of our energy and intentiononto it because what does it really do
anyway, Like, what does that? I mean, it doesn't really serve
us. In fact, in ourold company, we really used to talk
about body transformation and we had thousandsof people have body transformations, and guess
(05:58):
what, they were all still miserable. So it's like this idea of if
we do this, then this it'sfake. It's not even real. And
I intentionally even have people on ourpodcasts that are like ex fitness models,
bikini model, and they at thepeak of their quote unquote you know success
or what we think would would bringlike happiness, they literally all say the
(06:19):
same thing. I was miserable.My mental state was in the garbage.
I had no social life, likethey were miserable. And so I'm trying
to expose this idea that like whatwe think will make us happy, oh
that number will make me feel goodabout myself is actually false and if you
get it, it's only short lived. So it's like a vastly different world
(06:43):
that we've opened our company up to. That's really interesting because I think the
general conversation in the world is reallyrooted in that isn't it Like this is
what is valuable, This is whatmakes you valuable, and if you don't
look and feel this way or appearto the world this way, then somehow
(07:06):
you're deficient. M Yeah, youknow. About three years ago I worked
with this therapist too. I hadbeen working with this other therapist for a
long time and she was really great. She really spoke to my analytical,
data driven mind. And I cameto a point in my work with her
where I was like, I needto find someone who makes me a little
(07:27):
bit more uncomfortable. So I foundthis other therapist. She made me really
uncomfortable. She really wanted to likeacknowledge my inner child and like hold a
lot of space for me and cryfor me. And I was like,
oh, okay, I have togo here because I feel discomfort and I'll
never forget. Like after working withher for a few months, she came
to me and she said, Ijust want to acknowledge something because I'm not
sure you know this. And Iwas like, Okay, what she said,
(07:47):
you know that you're valuable and worthywithout doing anything right, Like you
don't have to be a good mom, you don't have to U you don't
have to have a successful business.You don't have to have achievement, you
don't have to be efficient, youdon't you don't have to do anything,
and you just your existence as ahuman being validates that you're worthy. And
I was like, come again,I didn't quite get it, but that
(08:11):
was because I was just living ina system that told me something so different
that I had to start to learnwith that what that meant mm hmm.
It's a paradigm shift, really huge, huge, but it's so valuable.
And so if we can get people. A lot of people come in and
they're like, Okay, I wantmy at home workout. Great, I
super customizable, as is what Ineed. It's like, you know,
(08:35):
a great alternative to a personal trainerthat's more affordable. And then I go
and surprise, We're going to actuallyalso help you think about your body and
connect with your body and care foryourself in a very different way. It's
something different to what you're talking about. It's almost like you're disembodied, right,
(08:56):
You're you're over here treating your bodyas something that needs to look a
certain way or fixed. Yes,right, like it's broken. So you
have this distance between you and yourbody and it sounds like what you're doing
is you're actually connecting those dots forpeople so that they're much more connected and
enjoying the process of what they're goingthrough because it has a greater purpose than
(09:22):
just quote looking good, losing thatten pounds for your reunion or whatever it
is we as women will tend todo. Absolutely. Do you guys get
involved with the food side of itas well? Do you have nutrition advice
and that sort of thing. Well, I mean it is inevitable in some
ways, right that Like when you'rewhen you have an exercise product or movement
(09:46):
product, people always want to talkabout diets. So we do not do
any diets. We're a bit antidiet over here. We respect people who
feel like that's the path for them, right. I think the premise of
our community and our brand is reallynot judgment, like really like offering self
kindness and self acceptance for ourselves andfor one another. But we do have
(10:07):
like educational resources and I do bringyou know, various experts on our podcast
to shed light into a lot ofthe food stuff. But no, we
don't. We don't prescribe it.It's it's even funny on the exercise side.
People will come in and say,well, how many days a week
should I work out? I'm like, I don't know your body, Like
what do you think your body needs? And people are just like dumbfounded by
(10:28):
that, and my co founders likejust give them an answer, like I
don't I'm not their body. Likea couple of days, I don't know,
right. It's like it's like Ihave lived personally in my life up
until a couple of years ago,where like my my head was attached to
my body, but there was nocommunication happening between those two things. It
was like my mind was in thedriver's seat, my body was just having
(10:50):
to They were it was trying sohard, I'm tired, don't do that.
Why are you doing this to me? And it was like, sorry,
the external dial is so loud,I can't listen to you. And
so what we're really trying to dois bring people back to that space of
like how do we turn up thatinternal dial of self that helps you create
that path. So it's a longway to answer, but no, we
(11:13):
don't prescribe diets. I just tryto provide educational resources for different perspectives that
we can have about our relationship.With food. Mm so again not diet.
It's nutrition number one. It's fuelfor the body that you're getting to
know again or maybe for the firsttime. I think for some people this
(11:33):
is a relationship maybe they've never hadof listening to their body many times,
and so you know, I dohave a lot of like you would call
intuitive eating experts. Come on.I think what it really is, though,
is like learning how to create neutralityand non judgment around food. I
think that's a really difficult thing,right, It's like and we all do
(11:56):
it, myself included, Like whenI look back on myself three years ago,
I was like, oh oh,I got the amount of restrictions that
I had on myself was just disorderedeating is what it was. It was
like, that is just not away to live. So approaching food from
a different perspective around like food isfood, right, Like some foods that
we consider good and healthy, LikeI love the example of broccoli because it's
(12:18):
like, Okay, that might workfor you, but what if that gives
me a stomach ache? Right?So now all of a sudden, what
is the label for that as agood? Still? So thinking about food
from a more neutral perspective and thinkingabout food from like, how do I
connect with that food in a differentway? And then when I do go
out with a friend or go outto dinner or have the have make a
cake at home or whatever it is, how do I then also create non
(12:41):
judgment around that and keep the neutralityaround those foods as well. Right,
Like I enjoyed that, maybe Itake information from it. Oh I had
three slices of that and I feltnauseous for two hours. Okay, I
didn't like that feeling. But I'mnot making an adjustment based on a judgment.
I'm making an adjustment based off anobservation of a communication that my body
is giving me, And those arevery different intentions. It's interesting to actually
(13:07):
pay attention to how you feel afteryou eat certain things. It's interesting because
your body is telling you. Butsomething Katie, that I think is maybe
not recognized is if we have beenliving unhealthy in our thoughts, unhealthy in
our food habits, healthy in ourmovement patterns, it takes a while to
(13:28):
build that relationship with your body andwith your mind and with your food in
a healthy way. In other words, somebody feeling their body and being in
tune with their body is a practiceat first, because I was talking to
someone about you know, if you'redoing something it could be food, it
could be exercise, and your bodygets attuned to that level of diet nutrition,
(13:54):
or it gets used to that kindof fitness, and you're used to
not feeling good. Right, You'rekind of of this is normal when actually
you're you would say, well,that's actually not normal. It might be
common, but it's not normal.And so how would you encourage someone who
has never learned to listen to theirbody? What do they look out for
(14:16):
and how do they begin to shifttheir attention, like you said, from
that disembodied like head and body aretwo separate entities, and beginning to create
that relationship so that they're more wholein the way they approach these things.
I would say curiosity is the firststep, and sometimes it's really the only
Like I always talk about this conceptof cracking the door to curiosity. You
(14:39):
don't have to swing it right openand change your beliefs overnight, but if
you can crack it, sometimes it'senough for just a little bit of that
light to come in and then whenyou kind of see things a little bit
differently from that, from that justthat peak of light coming in. It's
often enough momentum to just have thingsunfold. And I'll speak to an example
of like I used to be superrestrictive. I used to only eat certain
(15:03):
things, blah blah blah blah blah, and like, yeah, my body
liked it. Right, We couldargue that my body did like that.
However, I was suffering emotionally andenergetically, and I had no idea that
I was. So. I mighthave had good digestion and energy and no
real health problems, but I wassuffering in a different way that we can't
(15:26):
measure but does have an impact.Like energetically, I was deeply suffering.
But when I cracked that door tocuriosity and said, I wonder if what
I'm doing is really serving me.I wonder if I should base this more
just than just on how my digestionworks. And I started going, oh
my god, look at how muchtime, look at how much energy,
look at how much of your lifeyou're giving to this, And as a
(15:48):
result, you have to give upall these other things because you're only one
person with so much time and energyin the day. And so But it
was that cracking that door and forinstance, I'm in the middle of life
listening to a book called food Isn'tMedicine? That book. If someone would
have given me that book three yearsago, I would have gone off on
twenty different scientific resources as to whythat's not true just that title alone,
(16:11):
without even I wouldn't have even consideredreading that book. That doesn't That doesn't
validate my narrative. But because Iwas able to crack that door to curiosity
and get curious about I think thisis serving me. But let me just
double check. I went down acompletely different path. Hm. And what
was the concept of that particular book. I haven't finished it. I'm in
(16:34):
the middle of it, but it'sjust sort of like there's a lot of
misconceptions around. It's like we thepremise is that we attribute weight loss to
a certain weight being healthy, butthere are a million other factors that contribute
to someone feeling healthy in their body, and weight is not the number one.
That's a great conversation, isn't it. As women, we have really
(16:57):
and even my myself being periman apuzzle and having gone through quite a bit.
And it was all happening before thequarantine, during the quarantine, taking
care of my mother in law,her body failing and all of these stress
induced types of things. And Ithink that's a conversation around there are seasons
(17:19):
that our bodies go through and whatmight work for twenty thirty years. In
my case, I didn't change anything, but my body definitely did. My
weight changed for the first time inmy life other than pregnancy, And it's
like, what is happening? AndI think if our heads aren't on straight,
(17:41):
it's really disruptive, like to yourpoint, mentally and emotionally, psychologically,
when we are identified by that sortof thing, like our body looking
a certain way, and I'm definitelyone and that growing up there was a
(18:02):
lot of attention on how I looked. I happened to be slim, but
I didn't necessarily like the attention,and so it became a little dysmorphic for
me. And so I think thatwhen we're so strongly identified with this physical
casement that we have, we getlost in who we are. Is what
(18:23):
I hear you saying, there's thatwho I am, not how I look.
That really drives that mental and emotionaland physical health. Am I right?
Yeah? And think about it thisway too. It's like if I
identify my worth with how I receivevalidation for that, for my body or
(18:45):
for my looks, then I'm goingto continue to cling to that narrative even
more. And that is a scaryslippery slope because we don't I mean,
we're all going to age and we'reall going to get older, and so
I want to warn people of thatbecause that is a really, like I
said, slippery slope to get yourentire identity wrapped up in. And I
(19:06):
think about just the concept of that'snot really your true self anyway. And
if we can start to go backto what does that internal dial of self
really want, really need, reallysay, then that can start to reflect
on the outside. So like myold narrative was really wrapped in eat this
way and do this and get thesuccessful business and do this thing. So
(19:27):
my external narrative that was validating thatmatched. I had to go through a
transition where that external narrative had toswitch because it's not healthy for me to
be in this position inside going oh, I don't like it, and then
like still participating in that right like, and that is a very intense transition.
(19:47):
Sometimes I lost some friends. Iyou know, I definitely don't consume
the same content that I used tolike it was a transition, but I
think that if we can, wecan stand strong in that internal self.
I think that that is how wecan kind of pave our path through it
because and it does take practice toturn that dial up, right, We're
(20:11):
that dial's almost talked out of usas we as we get as we grow
up. But I feel like ifwe can stay grounded in that, and
I do feel grateful for that throughoutmy whole experience, even though I was
getting so much validation from the outsideabout my business and about this and about
that, that internal voice was likeno, no, no, and I
was like why why. But gettingcurious allowed me to say, oh,
(20:34):
that's why you didn't feel okay aboutthat, and that's okay, you can
go on this path now. Butstaying true to self is it sounds sort
of like silly and cliche, butit really, to me is the most
important thing. Mm hmmm. Theexistential part of it is I think for
some women it's knowing who they actuallyare. They need to be curious about
(20:55):
who they actually are and what theyactually value versus the dialogue that's in their
head. Like do I even agreewith this well, because people who identify
as female are often placed into roleswithout being asked if they wanted to be
there in the first place. Right, So, I mean, I'm sure
many people can consit in that andgo did I want that? Did I
(21:17):
like that? Who am? I? I think that it's it's you know,
the culture that we live in,unfortunately, has put a lot of
those expectations and roles on women.And I think it is okay to say,
you know what, even though Ilived that way for fifty years or
sixty years, it's okay for meto stop and do a check in and
really start dissecting was that the pathI really wanted to be. I just
(21:37):
don't believe it's ever too late todo that. I will say that it
can be hard for people who arein your life when you do that,
but doesn't mean it's not a reasonto still do it. Yeah, that's
definitely a midlife journey for a lotof people. Have you know. I'm
in my sixth year of this podcast, and I've talked to hundreds of people,
and the reality is that we dohave seasons of life where those roles
(22:04):
have a place and they make sensefor certain seasons of our lives. And
there's nothing bad or wrong about alot of the roles that we play.
The problem is, to your point, we reach a point in our lives
where it does need to be evaluated. Does this serve me? Is this
(22:26):
something I want to continue to do? Something I want to continue to be
because we change our situations and circumstanceschange. You know, growth is to
your point, sometimes the cost ofgrowth is the people around you don't like
it. M That is one ofthe hardest things. For sure. I
(22:48):
would say that I've had to warnsome people that have you know, we've
had a part ways and that isthat is really hard. And I will
say though, that the other sideof that, like, nothing has ever
felt as good to me as likefollowing that voice inside and having that inner
sense of knowing and strengthening that voice. Nothing feels the same, Nothing feels
(23:10):
the same after that mm hm.And you just practice that, and you
just build the reps, and I'mnowhere near that voice being turned up all
the way. I think that's actuallya lifelong journey. But you know the
feeling when that feels right, weall know that embodied feeling. Ooh,
that feels right. And then whatwe do is we get back in our
head and we go but this andthat, but this and that. I
can't do that, ha ha,right, Yes, one of the things
(23:32):
all shared that I did. Honestly, I think the thing that actually really
started me on this as I startedworking with an energy worker who did nervous
system work, because I didn't evenfeel safe to have that thought like are
you are? Like I didn't evenmy body didn't even feel safe to be
like do you like that? Doyou not like that? Like, like,
I didn't even feel safe enough todo that in my own nervous system.
(23:52):
So I don't know if you've everheard of network spinal analysis. No,
it's like a form of chiropractic,but they don't do any man all
adjustments. I feel like it's nervoussystem work. It like works on regulating
and grounding and making your nervous systemfeel safe so that you can be the
true expression of who you are.Right. A lot of times I think
we're unaware that we're making these decisionsin our life and participating in behaviors out
(24:15):
of safety. And no one canget curious if they don't feel safe.
True, So I think that wasHonestly, the very very very first step
for me was like, how doI get safe in this nervous system.
It doesn't have to be network finalanalysis. I was just I had recognized
that I was really wound up andI didn't even feel safe to ask myself
certain questions, and I needed tofigure out a way to get that safety
(24:37):
before I could really go down thatpath. It's like the nervous system was
disregulated. It was set to thewrong thing. Yeah, yeah, super
disregulated. And it was like,oh, I'm doing that, and now
I can look back and go,oh, you did that out of fear.
Oh you did that out of conditioning. Oh you did that out of
anxiety. Right, I can kindof look back and see a lot of
(24:57):
my life's decisions, none of andwe're like, oh, you did that
out of like safety and security andintuition some things. It wasn't like it's
not black and white, but alot of things were like fear, anxiety,
conditioning. That's not that's not yourtrue self, that's dysregulation. Right.
(25:18):
Yeah. The thing about growth isbecause growth is uncomfortable for us when
we face these things and we questionthese things, that causes discomfort for other
people, and I think that's wherethose relationships began to break down, because
we've really disrupted not just our ownlife, but it's like dropping a pebble
(25:41):
in water. There's ripples that goout and it disrupts other people's nervous systems
too, you know, and maybemaybe that ripple will move them in that
curiosity direction. But I think aswe approach a shift in our mindset to
(26:02):
your point, it takes time toturn up that dial. And it is
a lifelong journey. It's not aone and done. We will find ourselves
in situations and in relationships that willmaybe woo us back to that place to
fit in or to feel comfortable oryeah, that's being a human being.
Like I find myself all the timegoing, oh you did that yesterday.
Okay, that didn't come from intuition, that came from anxiety. Right.
(26:26):
That's what I mean is I don'tknow that it ever goes away, right,
But if people can come to weshape and like learn how to connect
with their body in a new way, I'm hoping to just crack that door
to curiosity. Like that's really whatwe're trying to do here, is like,
Okay, come for the workout,and let's also talk about some of
these other things, and we hopethat the workout facilitates a new connection with
your body that you haven't had before, and then that can maybe open the
(26:48):
door to, you know, figuringout if that connection with self is as
aligned to somebody wants. It's reallyonly everybody's decision how what alignment, to
what degree of that alignment they want. Speaking more to what you said about
the people getting uncomfortable in my life, I mean, I like to use
this analogy of like, okay,like let's say you and I are best
friends and for twenty years we've donethis tango dance together, and then I've
(27:11):
discovered this thing about myself or thesethings about myself, and I'm learning about
myself in a way I haven't learned, and I'm realizing that I actually kind
of like the waltz, like thatfits me, that suits me better,
that feels more true to who Iam. It's like you, as my
friend, get to say, ohmy god, can you teach me that
dance that I've never seen a dancelike that? Or you're stepping all over
(27:32):
my feet. I don't like this, and I gotta go, and that
can be painful, but it doesn'tmean I'm not supposed to be doing the
waltz. It's not a message justnot to stay true to you. It's
just a message that that person's ona different path and they're not ready for
that dance, and that's okay.Yeah, I think that was a profound
statement. You know, just becausesomeone else doesn't approve of the path you're
(27:56):
on doesn't mean that you're on thewrong journey. I think that's a maturing
process in our emotional state. Ohabsolutely. I still sometimes I'm like,
oh, why do I care whatthat person said? Why do I am
like, oh, fear anxiety conditioning. I want validation, I want to
know I'm worth it, right.But I think if we practice that inner
(28:19):
knowing, that inner trust that,and we continue just to stay curious,
we could continue to cultivate a communityof people around us. This is why
I actually incorporated. So we launchedour product and then I was like,
we have to launch a community elementto our products because I can't ask people
to like just you know, throwaway toxic weight loss culture and not worry
about that like that, They're like, what what are you doing? Right?
(28:41):
Well, we need people to supporteach other during this journey because they're
going to come hear our message anddo a work out with us and connect
with our body in a new way, and then they're going to go back
into the world and they're going tobe like, take that, do this
diet, and you only valuable ifyou lose twenty pounds before you're saying it's
like, okay, we gotta wegotta offer canmmunity support. So we actually
do have daily zoom calls where weall get together we talk about, like
(29:04):
you know, our journey in wellnessand dissecting some of these messages and the
challenges that come with that. SoI really want to emphasize how important finding
your community is. It's okay ifyou don't want to do the salsa anymore.
It's okay if you're going to dothe waltz. Now there are plenty
of people in this world who arealso doing that same dance. I think
(29:25):
we find new parts of ourselves toowhen we make these changes that you didn't
even know about. Absolutely absolutely,you know, fitness does really change for
me. I've learned through different guests, is your body's changing, and this
is something to think about. Whereis your state of being in this moment,
(29:48):
what is your you know, like, where are your hormones at,
what's happening in your life, where'syour cortisol level? Like are you in
a like taking care of my motherin law? That was there were a
lot of reasons that that season oftwo and a half years was very stressful.
There were times when it probably wasn't, but the overall impact was really
(30:10):
strong. So I think, likeanything, there's a journey of awareness of
figuring out the whole picture of whatwe're experiencing and why we're experiencing it,
and how we're engaging with that elementof our lives. And I think body
movement is a way to move emotionsthrough the body, to move the cord
(30:38):
us all out, Like it canliterally be movement of the body. Let's
take exercise out of the conversation.And I'm just saying thinking about it differently,
Okay, is it exercise? Itcould be, But how about using
our bodies and partnering with ourselves tomove move these things through so that they
(31:00):
don't get stuck inside of us?You know, using it in that way
movement is really powerful as well.Oh absolutely, I'm like, we're a
culture that's fixated on exercise and loseweight, and I'm like, but what
about all the other things that movementdoes? Like I the other day,
I you worked out with a friendand then I was like, oh my
(31:21):
god, I have double the energythat I did yesterday. I'm like,
I wonder why. Like it,We're just so it's like we don't even
think about those things right, like, oh, my anxiety seems down.
Oh I was really processing some griefand that helped me process that grief.
Like we don't. There's like amillion other things that movement does for us,
and our culture is stuck on thelike, well, what does a
scale say? It just I eventuallyI actually got rid of all the scales
(31:42):
in my house. I recycled them. I was like, they're not even
allowed in here. I'm not goingto have two daughters growing up in a
home where we're looking at that numberand finding meaning and value behind it.
I just couldn't do it anymore.And but yeah, the amount the benefits
of movement, and that's why wedeveloped the product that we did, because
what I do today for movement mightbe need to be different tomorrow, Like
maybe I don't sleep well tonight maybeI'm like feeling more anxious to like,
(32:07):
I don't know. And so ourproduct allows this interactive piece where you can
say, oh, scale that movementdown. And we're coming and saying the
opposite of what most of us haveheard, which is, you know,
a lot of the products out therelike you know, push through and no
pay, no gain, and we'relike, whoa, whoa, whoa,
listen to your body. You didn'tsleep, You shouldn't be doing an intense
workout to keep it more mellow.Scale down, and so we're trying to
(32:30):
get people to like even just youexercise and movement in a very different way.
It's We're not going to like doone one exercise program for the rest
of our lives like that. That'snot how it works. It's like,
maybe for two months, my back'sbeen bothering me and I'm doing a lot
of like really mindful movement, andmaybe this other season, I have a
lot of anxiety, so I'm actuallyneeding to work my body a little harder
(32:52):
just to kind of move some ofthat anxiety through. But there's no prescription.
That's why when people come in andthey say what do I do?
I mean, I will sometimes belike, you know, if people say
I haven't worked out in years andI really want to, I will sometimes
say we'll start with one day aweek, don't be cause you know,
then people do the thing where theydo seven days and then they get burnt
out, Like, no, don'tdo that. Maybe start with one day.
(33:12):
But this is not about we're notrobots, we're not We're humans.
We're human beings. We need tolike understand that it's complicated and layered and
what may work for one person doesn'twork for another. And that's kind of
like also the root of our ofour product is meeting people where their body
needs. And what your body needstoday maybe different than what it needs in
a week or a month, andthat's okay, it's exactly that's the point
(33:36):
that that's being a human being.Yeah, and that's really wise information and
wise advice to recognize that what yourbody has needed or has worked can change.
Yeah, And I think that's importantto my point about like perimenopause.
One of the things that I've learnedis you have a body style and the
(33:59):
time of day and the type ofexercise really impacts the body. We're dealing
with. Cortisol is now the motivation. Yeah, in our bodies, like
how do we navigate the cortisol?Well, if you do this kind of
workout and you do it in themorning and it's not your body style,
you raise your cortisol, you've putstress on your body. And so I
(34:21):
think the idea that exercise is notjust running and lifting heavy weights, and
you know, grinding is such ahealthy and helpful way to make a shift
in our thinking. It's like,what is exercise specifically? You know?
Absolutely yeah, And we're saying movementover exercise. I'm not saying you're going
(34:45):
to come to us and not geta good workout. We can give you
any kind of workout you want.In fact, when our head trainer was
filming all the videos, I feltreally bad for him the last couple of
days. So I'm not sometimes peoplecoming up it's going to be too easy.
I'm like, it's actually going tobe whatever your body needs. So
we can take someone who's coming froma physical therapy office all the way to
a professional athlete. Don't worry somuch about that. Let's try to tap
(35:07):
in and see what your body needstoday. And it was reminding me like
I was actually had dinner with afriend last night and she was like,
you know, a couple months ago, I for whatever reason, wanted to
do a half marathon. So Istarted running and I was like, oh,
okay, that sounds nice. Andthen she was like and then two
weeks into this training program, Iwas doing my hip hurt and I said,
oh, what did you do?She goes, I said, I'm
not doing that anymore, and Isaid, you know what, that is
(35:28):
incredible because if the way that ourculture supports that narrative is had you push
through and you did it, andyou were in pain and you were miserable,
but everyone would have been like,nice job pushing through, you know.
I'm like, I'm actually want tolike really acknowledge and give you validation
and listening to your body and stoppingbecause your body did not like that you
were getting hurt and and and that'swhat I'm trying to say, Like we
(35:52):
were made to believe in this fitnessculture that just pushing through and doing that's
that your body might not want.That. Now, that's very different than
throw the baby out with the bathwater and never move I'm like, I
do believe the human body needs movement. Yeah, absolutely, And I have
really been trying to tap in specificallylately with myself. Like when I go,
oh, my body doesn't feel likedoing that workout, I go,
(36:13):
Okay, does it not? Doesit not want to do it? Or
does it just want to like dosomething that's a little bit easier and needs
more rest like recovery. And that'sa fine line too, right, because
our brain can people can also gothe other direction. So I'm like,
we got to get in tune withthe with knowing ourselves and knowing when I'm
like, oh, yeah, mybody's saying it doesn't want that, but
(36:35):
it actually needs that because I havea lot of anxious energy in my body
right now, so I need toI need to listen to that anxious energy.
Right It's it's it's layered, it'scomplicated, there's and this is why
when people come and they want theprescription, I'm like, I can't give
you the prescription. I can.I can offer you support. I can
I can connect you with community memberswho have dealt with the same thing.
We can talk about our experiences.But it's not my job to say this
(36:59):
is the diet you should be onand this is the thing you should do.
And I just want to provide thetools and the resources and the support
to do what you think is bestfor you. And I love how you
pointed out earlier that it's not likeone prescription for the rest of your life.
It could be you know, there'sthose people who run. They love
to run. Running is their jamand they've done it for forty years or
whatever. But it's the idea ofyou know, broadening our perspective on what
(37:24):
movement feels good and maybe trying somethingdifferent, maybe something that doesn't isn't as
measurable because you know, when you'redoing reps, you can count them.
You're doing steps, you can countthem. Yeah, but like if you're
doing well and yoga, you cando it by the progress that you make.
But sometimes something like just moving yourbody to music absolutely is a great
(37:49):
way to move your body, butyou can't measure that sort of thing.
And I think we're used to metricsas a way of knowing that we've quote
done a good job absolutely, andyou know, we don't do like the
badges and the rewards and uh,we don't do that here. We have
a monthly feel good score where wecheck in to see how is your sleep,
how's your self confidence, how muchenergy do you have? Are you
(38:12):
in pain? And we kind oflook at those things. It is funny,
like I'm constantly doing this delicate balanceand product with like people wanting certain
things and me kind of having aphilosophical stance on like I don't really want
to do that. Yeah, soI'm like, Okay, people want to
look at something on their dashboard,you can let us know how you're feeling
in your body this month. ButI'm not really here to like have confetti
(38:32):
go off when you did your hundredthworkout in a short It's like, this
is not the purpose of this product. The purpose of this product is for
you to move and feel good inyour body and not to that alone says
why I can't do that all thetime, which is a gentle it's a
gentle mentorship sort of Really. Yeah, I'm accepting of whatever anybody needs,
(39:00):
whatever path I am. I'm like, you're at that part of your path,
great, I'm gonna offer this,right, I'm gonna offer this.
And you know, I do wakeup every day and I thank the greater
forces out there for the UH forproviding for we shape because it has been
a struggle to be in a startupenvironment and to go against the grain,
(39:20):
right, Like when you go toan investor and you're like, well,
we're not focusing on weight loss andwe're not promising anything with their body,
They're like, wait, what howare you selling that? So you know,
I first thank the universe for justthe opportunity for continuously providing, and
then second I say, bring mepeople who are ready for we shape.
It's not my job to convince peopleto unsubscribe from toxic diet and exercise culture.
(39:42):
Like, if you're ready, let'sdo it. Let's go together,
Let's be on this path, let'suncover, let's connect with ourselves in a
way we haven't, but I don't. I've discovered that I really don't want
to spend my energy and time inlife away from my kids here at this
company convincing people otherwise. Like,if you're crack the door to curiosity and
you want to experience a new way, Hey, we're here for you.
Let's let's talk about it. Yeahthat's fantastic. So if you had to
(40:06):
give the listeners, you know,three takeaways, three things you want them
to anchor into. What would thosebe get? Curious things that you think
serve, you might not actually beserving. You get community right, So
as you uncover things about yourself thatyou feel are shifting, find the community
(40:29):
who supports that, and it's okayif people don't like you can keep going
on your path even if other peopledon't like it. And then just from
the exercise perspective, like focus onhow your body moves, focus on how
your body feels, and it's okayto unsubscribe from all of the messages around.
You need to be this way inorder to feel worthy and validate it.
(40:51):
It's simply not true. Fantastic,Okatie. How can people find you
and we Shape? They can actuallyhave a special link for your listeners if
they want to give we Shape atry for free for two weeks, they
can go to we shape dot comforward slash Feminine Roadmap for their two week
free trial. We're on all socialplatforms. We have two social handles.
(41:13):
You can find us at we shape, which is all movement related content,
and then we have at we ShapePodcasts, which is all content around this
toxic diet and exercise culture that we'vebeen speaking about today. Fantastic, Well,
Katie, I want to thank youso much for taking the time to
be on my show today and toshare your passion around helping people become more
(41:35):
healthy in their relationship with themselves.And it's all around that acceptance, that
grace, that kindness, that reallybeing truly content and happy in the state
that we're in. And I reallyappreciate you bringing that gentleness and that encouragement
that if you are ready to havethis, that there you are offering something
(41:58):
that's going to not make them feelbad, it's going to make them feel
good and right in their bodies.So thank you so much for stepping out,
going against the grain and creating somethingthat is going to help people become
more whole as a mind, body, and a spirit, not just a
number on the scale. Thank youso much, Gin, I really appreciate
the opportunity fantastic friends today. Ifyou find us on YouTube, you can
(42:22):
just look down below. I willhave the links there for you. If
you happen to be driving, youcan head to www. Dot Feminine roadmap
dot com. Forward Slash episode threefour seven and the links will be there.
This conversation today is hopefully going tobe a springboard for you to investigate
(42:43):
how you approach the way that youtreat your body when it comes to nutrition,
when it comes to movement, andencouraging us as women to change the
conversation about how we look and whatthe value of that is. And I
think it's an important on going conversationbecause it's so deeply rooted in who we
(43:04):
are to look a certain way,to weigh a certain thing, and this
is good, this is bad,this is right, this is wrong.
So today the conversation just is toencourage you to step back and evaluate,
be curious about whether or not thoseideas, those judgments, if you will,
are actually serving you anymore, andnot even judging that you've lived that
(43:27):
way possibly your whole life, butjust really saying, what else can I
do and how else can I feelgood? In this body? This is
carrying us through life. It's carryingour emotions, it's carrying our experiences,
it's carrying everything. How can wepartner with it, listen to it,
love it, and have a healthier, happier, more balanced life and remove
(43:51):
ourselves from the things that put thatpower in other people's hands, like how
I look. So friends, weencourage you to tap into we shape.
Like Katie said, we have anoffer for you if you just head to
like I said down below on YouTubeor to episode three four seven on Feminine
roadmap dot com. Check that out. See if make that part of the
(44:15):
door to curiosity. See if thisis something that you're ready for right now
to make that shift. I thankyou for being with us today for listening
in on this conversation. I doencourage you to share this with your friends
because this would be a great wayto build a healthier and happier community around
ourselves. Thank you so much forbeing here today. I look forward to
(44:36):
sharing more interesting people, important strategies, and empowering conversations with you in the
weeks to come. Take care ofmy friends. Bye bye,
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