Meth: the Devil's Drug, Trapped In a Nightmare Facility | Jerry Marzinsky & Patrick D - Forbidden Knowledge News

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:02):
I think it's just going to get weirder and weirder
and weirder, and finally it's going to be so weird
that people are going to have to talk about how
weird it is. Eventually people are going to say, what
the hell is going on? It's not enough to say
it's nuts. You have to explain why it's so nuts.

(00:23):
The invention of artificial life, the cloning of human beings,
possible contact with extraterrestrials, the systems which are in place
to keep the world saying are in utterly inadequate to
the forces that have been unleashed.

Speaker 2 (00:46):
Welcome back to Forbidden Knowledge News. I'm your host Chris Matthew. Today,
my guests are Jerry Marzinski and Patrick. First, be sure
to check out my films. Doors of Perception is on
Amazon Prime. I called Louisiana's on to be Roku, Chain,
Apple and Moore. We're booking guests for November. If you
have suggestions or you'd like to be a guest, email

(01:07):
me Forbidden Knowledge neews at gmail dot com. Today, I
want to welcome Jerry Marzinski and Patrick. Jerry is a
retired licensed psychotherapist now author with over thirty five years
of experience working with and studying the thought processes and
voices heard by psychotic and criminally insane patients in some

(01:29):
of the most volatile psychiatric institutions in the nation. Patrick
is a former methaddict that spent a year in a
mental health facility and now speaks out about the corruption
within these state facilities. Jerry Patrick, Welcome, how y'all doing.

Speaker 3 (01:49):
Good, doing real well. Thanks for having us.

Speaker 2 (01:52):
Thank you both for coming on. Jerry, thank you for
coming back. Jerry, of course, is back once again to
share his insight. It's about Patrick's story, and Patrick is
here to tell his incredible experiences within and ultimately an
escape from a Texas mental health facility. This is such

(02:14):
important information to share, quite shocking actually, and Patrick, this
is your first time on. Before we get too deep
into everything, first, just tell us a little bit about yourself.

Speaker 3 (02:27):
Well, I'm Patrick Durkin. I wrote the book Fire and Ice,
the Meth Bible under the name Boston Born Again, and
I was a crystal meth addict. I was trapped in
addiction and that led me into living in a mental
institution for the criminally insane, two different facilities. One was

(02:47):
Vernon Maximum Security in Vernon, Texas. And the second one
was in San Antonio State Hospital and it was a
wild ride because when I was there, I was completely sane.

Speaker 2 (02:58):
Wow. Very interesting. And Jerry, just remind the audience briefly
a little bit about yourself. Let them know how they
can find out more about you.

Speaker 4 (03:07):
Well, my name's Jerry Marzinski. I've been working on the
front lines of mental health for close to fifty years now,
and we're going to bring you an inside story today
by Patrick of what it's like to be trapped on
one of these big psychiatric hospitals when you're saying and
you can't get out. Now, a little bit of history
behind what happened here is back in the seventies, there

(03:30):
was Proposition thirteen started in California, which was a tax rebellion.
They got tired of paying the increasingly large taxes. So
the population what, We're not doing it anymore. So the
government says, Okay, we're gonna have to shut down some stuff.
One of the first things they shut down were state hospitals,
mental hospitals. So here's these people who were schizophrenic, they're

(03:54):
seriously mentally ill. They couldn't work, they couldn't hold a job,
and they were saying, Okay, we're going to set up
mental health centers all over the all over the US.
Then they will increase the number of mental health centers.
These people should be in a more normal population. That's
not what happened. And they wouldn't take their medications even

(04:15):
when they were in the state hospital, and they certainly
weren't going to go out of the way to take
them when the hospitals are closed down. So they closed
these people these palaces down, and back in the seventies,
you didn't see people laying all over the streets, intense homeless,
unable to work, committing crimes. So the crime rate swared
once they let they closed these hospitals. Crime rate sword.

(04:37):
What are these people going to do. They can't work,
they can't feed themselves. They're going to either sell drugs,
use drugs, or rob steal, break into people's houses. So
the crime rates shot up. On top of that, they're going, oh,
we're going to save money. I'd say more than half
of these people ended up in state prisons at more
than twice the cost of keeping them into hospital. Right,

(05:02):
So even when they were in the state hospital, they
at least they got food, they had housing, They weren't
out causing trouble. They got their medications, they had someplace
to live. Nobody was being cured of anything that they
were drugging down these entire populations of people in those hospitals.

(05:22):
Nobody was being cured. The pharmaceutical industry was making a fortune,
psychiatrists were making a fortune. The conditions within these hospitals
were sickney I worked in one for seven years. The
outside grounds, when you got onto the grounds, it was beautiful.
I mean, they just had manicured lawn. It looked like,
you know, some kind of rich man's mansion or something.

(05:45):
But once you got in there, if you could get
in there and the regular population could not, it was
a horror show. In many of those words, it was
a horror show. There are people being bit assaulted. There's
one one one time, I remember the one one patient

(06:07):
bit the ear off another one and then the whole
ward wanted to have a funeral for that ear, so
they put that They put that ear into shoe box
on the nurse's desk, and it was there in the morning,
and then all the patients go, we have to have
a funeral, We have to have a funeral, so they
let them all outside. They dug a grave for the ear,

(06:28):
and gave a little sermon for the ear, and buried
the ear. So and it gets worse than that. That's
just one of the you know, it gets much worse
than that. It gets so gross. There's stuff I don't
want to eat and talk about. I'm sure sad Patrick's
seeing that. Yep. So here here now you have this,
this set of mental health centers all over the US

(06:50):
that were overwhelmed. You know, I had one lady when
I was working Saide Crisis in one of the emergency rooms.
She was going nuts. She tried to go to the
mental health enter and they wouldn't let her in, they
wouldn't enroll her. Okay, so she ended up in the
emergency room, okay, and and just psychoticist, bedbug. The mental

(07:15):
health salators are overwhelmed. The psychiatric hospitals are overwhelmed. They
all all all the psychiatric facilities are overwhelmed. I mean,
these people are not getting cured.

Speaker 2 (07:26):
Now you're saying it's still like this, it's.

Speaker 4 (07:29):
Still it's it's still like this in getting worse. Wow,
The emergency rooms are full of suite patients. Matter of fact,
the doctors are screaming bloody murder because they want those
site patients out of there because they don't know what
to do with them. I'm crazy, you know. So we
have to we had to find a place to put them,
either send them home or admitted to the hospital. And
when you went admitted them to the hospital, what they

(07:51):
do is they just wait until they ran out of
insurance and then all of a sudden they discharge them. Yeah,
so they'd fill them full of drugs. These drugs weren't
curing anything, and they were insisting that this was a
chemical brain imbalance that started this. There is no chemical
brain imbalance. You know. If you look at what psychiatrists

(08:11):
are doing, and I've seen it a bunch of times,
is they'll bring the patient in, they'll talk to them
for a few minutes, what's going on, and then they'll go, okay,
they'll give them a diagnosis, and right away they will
prescribe a drug for them. So even though they're insisting
that this mental illness is a chemical imbalance in the brain,
they're they're not taking any baseline. There's no lab test,

(08:34):
there's no EEG, there's no EKG, there's no test whatsoever
to determine what of the two hundred or so neurotransmitters
in the brain are out of black, or by how much.
It's a sham.

Speaker 2 (08:48):
I wonder how many of these people are being used
as guinea pigs or experimentation for these drugs.

Speaker 4 (08:55):
Let's tell you, as soon as a new drug comes out, man,
that the drug company representatives were all over that hospital,
you know, oh try this, try that. Oh yeah, it
has much less side effects. So they're always peddling their drugs.
We had a constant flow of drug salesman coming through there,
you know, and they would just bring in hundreds and
hundreds of pounds of drugs. You know, they were just

(09:17):
they were drugging any everybody. But I remember one day,
this was one in the maybe in the first month
I worked at this hospital. There was a banister, it
was like a pipe that ran from the first floor
of the psychiatric unit I was working on up to
the second floor. The top of this banister on the
second floor did not have a metal cap on it.

(09:38):
The one on the bottom floor did. So one day
I'm walking through the first floor of the psych unit
and here's a maintenance man cutting the cap off of
the bottom part of the banister, and that was the
most exciting thing going on. There were sparks, flying, smoke.

Speaker 2 (09:57):
You know.

Speaker 4 (09:57):
All the patients were all there, you know, kind of
watching all that, like the fireworks. So I just jumped
in the crowd with them, and I was just watching
it too, and you know, we were all having like
a little firework show until that cap fell off of
that banister. Once that cap hit the floor, it was
followed by a gush of thousands of psychiatric pills came

(10:17):
gushing out of that canister banister. Those patients had been
throwing those pills down that banister for decades. It was
like a waterfall of multipolored pills hit the floor and
spread out all over the place. And I'm stooped down
and I'm looking at those things, and I'm going God
that most of them were anti psychotic drugs. And each

(10:37):
one of these is a vote for a psychiatric patient
to stay insane. What is going on with this? But
you know what got my goat is I remember a
few times and some of the private psychiatric hospitals I worked,
they would bring nursing students through there to let them
do a psych residency, and I watched their orientation. They're like, Oh,

(11:01):
don't look these guys in the eyes. Man, don't and
don't talk to them. They you know, it's like they're
going to get killed if they do something. I mean,
I've worked seven years on wards, very dangerous words, and
I was never hurt. I was never threatened. They make
it look like the people in these hospitals are murderous lunatics,

(11:23):
and that if you walk through one of the wards,
they're gonna attack you and you're going to you're gonna die.
I mean, they scare the Jesus out of these people.
They won't let families onto those wards. They won't let
anybody who's unauthorized into that hospital. They don't want people
to see what goes on there. Patrick's going to give
you a bird's eye view of what it's like to

(11:46):
kind of go nuts and then come off a meth
trip and sober up on one of these wards in
one of the biggest psychiatric hospitals in San Diego, Texas.
So you're gonna get a tour that you would never
see otherwise. You know the trick.

Speaker 2 (12:03):
Yeah, love to hear the story.

Speaker 3 (12:06):
It's you know, and it's it's a fine line between
the spiritual realm and mental health. Okay, And my journey
starts like that. And I start this story the same
way everywhere I tell it. And I said that I'm
born on January thirty first, nineteen eighty two, and the
devil tried to kill me that day, and I've been
fighting for my life ever since. Okay. And there is

(12:26):
a correlation directly between the flow of crystal meth amphetamines
into this country and the state hospital system and the
sea of tense cities that you see lining the city
streets in the United States, in every major city like Seattle,
San Francisco, Austin, Texas, you go anywhere, meth has engulfed
this entire country, this entire continent.

Speaker 4 (12:48):
When I worked in the state prison that the prison
was full of methadics. Dude had gone nuts. I've never
seen more people go psychotic on any drug than that, Jerry.

Speaker 3 (12:59):
What are they nickname meth amphetamines in the prison system.

Speaker 4 (13:03):
They call it the Devil's drug.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
And they ain't lying because it is now. When I
wrote this book, The Meth Bible, I've sold thousands of
copies in ten countries and it's really one of the
only books that talks about the connection between crystal meth
amphetamines and the supernatural realm. And this all ties into
the entire story. Okay, I was a full blown alcoholic

(13:26):
at fourteen years old. I came from a house, an
alcoholic home with childhood trauma, and from my first drink,
I was an alcoholic. And then years went by drug
and alcohol addiction. And I'm fast forwarding through a lot
of this story because what we're gonna focus on today
is the chapter in this book that I titled Dark
Day's Asylum Nights, and it's my trip inside the mental

(13:49):
institution system in the state of Texas, and it mirrors
the entire country low funded. But that's the cover story, okay,
because they have these big, spr rawling places and they
are pill mills, their experimentation centers, and I'm gonna get
in on all that, and I'm gonna give you a
bird's eye view that not many people are able to tell,

(14:11):
because by the time I got there, I was completely healed.
It was an amazing story.

Speaker 4 (14:16):
But one flew over the Cuckoo's nest exactly that Hitler
was a methadic.

Speaker 3 (14:21):
Yeah. In the book, blitzed by Norman Ohler. The Nazi
German army was all on a drug called purvetin okay,
which is basically a crystal meth pill just like your
adderalls and your vivance is today. Okay. It was pharmaceutical speed.
Then they commissioned a chocolate factory in Nazi Germany to

(14:41):
lace chocolate with this drug as a pep pill for
the workforce. This is so the whole country of Germany
is under the spell of the ice crystal myth. And
they all go along with some of the greatest war
crimes and atrocities that this planet's ever seen against two
God's chosen people. I mean, it's all tied in together.

(15:02):
It's crazy. But I was a businessman and I was
an addict and an alcoholic, and I lost it all
in a couple bad business deals. And long story short is,
the wife and kids are gone. The absence of the
sound of their feet on the floor drove me crazy.
I was living in a city called Corpus Christi, Texas,
which name quite literally means the body of Christ in Spanish.

(15:26):
It's interesting that God let this story unfold in the
city after his namesake. I mean, he is an amazing author.
I'll tell you that. Okay. So I'm in this city,
I lose everything. I end up moving back in with
my dad. I'm not in the business world anymore.

Speaker 4 (15:42):
Now.

Speaker 3 (15:42):
I've been dabbling as a meth addict. Now I'm a
full blown methadict. And I went on a purposeful two
year long suicide mission in the grimy underworld of crystal
meth amphetamines. I'm a nighttime cab driver. I'm sliding through
the city streets in the gutter, the neon slime. My

(16:03):
clientele was pimps, prostitutes, drug dealers, money printers, professional thieves.
And I got involved in the dark underworld that is drugs, right,
and I lost myself. I'm an iv methewser. I start
experiencing the supernatural. Okay, so many amazing stories, jaw dropping

(16:24):
moments with the Lord, Jesus Christ and the Devil, walking
hand in hand with the serpent and seeking the Lord
at the same time. It's a very strange experience. And
I went into what's called deep meth aphetamine psychosis. Are
you familiar with that time?

Speaker 2 (16:39):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (16:41):
Okay, So I start spinning out, they call it. Okay,
I start having smaller delusions. There's auditory and visual hallucinations.
I start to believe that I am the target of
this major Hollywood production, if you can wrap your head
around this. In a chapter in the book called movie Magic,
I start thinking I'm filmed with hidden cameras, which is

(17:03):
really common for meth addicts, right. But then satellites. I
believe satellites are filming me. After I posted these stories
on TikTok and other platforms around the world. The movie
The Truman Show. Do you remember that with Jim Carey.
There's so many people. It's a phenomenon between twenty seventeen
and today where people believe they were in a reboot

(17:24):
of the movie The Truman Show. So, Jim, if you're watching,
I'm waiting on my check still okay, but I start going,
I'm so spun out. I believe Jim Carrey is actually
an executive producer in this movie that's being shot about
my life. They selected me out of the meth world
and whatnot. I'm now walking the city streets. I have

(17:45):
a do rag on, I've got pictures and stuff from
this time frame. It's crazy, and I'm walking fifteen miles
a day, just torture demonically possessed. Okay, total methanphetamine addict,
sex and pornography addict, running the whole gambit, physically, spiritually,
and emotionally broken. And I find myself living in this
trap house that used to be my grandparents' house, and

(18:08):
the city actually boards up the whole house one hundred
and ten degrees. I'm not eating, drinking water or eating
food for a week at a time, and I am
absolutely out of my mind. And one day I found
out that my father was dead. And four hours later, okay,
he disappears and I think he's playing golf in Hawaii

(18:31):
as part of the movie script. That's how far out
I was literally mentally challenged. Later on, deemed by the
State of Texas unable to stand trial, unfit to stand trial. Okay.
So I was in the boarded up house and I
woke up and it was like the spirit of God
came over me. I'd been trying to get into drug
treatment for the month leading up to this, and they

(18:52):
refuse me twice. So we have a broken drug treatment
facility industry in this country. I couldn't get the help.
I was too crazy form one of those places. Anyway,
at this point, but I looked over. I mean, you
have to picture this trash up to the fiberboard in
the house, Needles everywhere, just drug paraphernalia everywhere, tons of

(19:13):
just homeless people in and out of this house, a
shell of a home as it was. I look over
and there's a knife on an old ratty knight stand.
I picked the knife up and I verbally said, this
ends now. So this was a surrender moment in my addiction.
And I walked around the corner. I went about a
block up the street and I went into a McDonald's

(19:35):
restaurant and I opened the door. I was covered in
self inflicted knife wounds. I opened the door and I
had the knife, and I screamed, this is not a robbery.
Everybody get up out of here. And the four employees
ran out the back door. And I was so out
of my mind. I'm like, I'm gonna do a crime
on purpose to go to jail to get clean, because

(19:55):
I know i'll do something. I'll be in there for
a month, two months. I threw the knife down and
I ran behind the counter and I took a burger
and I poured myself a coke and I sat down
and I waited for the police. They called me the Hamburgler.
When I got to jail. I was already famous by
the time I got there. So the police came and

(20:16):
they pumped a twelve gage shotgun and came in. I
dove on the floor and I surrendered peacefully. But I
was charged with aggravated armed robbery in the state of Texas,
three counts of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon because
I had a knife and I scared those folks even
though I was thirty feet from them, and I was charged.

(20:37):
The first charge of armed robbery was five to ninety
nine years, the consequent three charges for assault with a
deadly weapon two to twenty years. Eat. That's one hundred
and fifty six years stacked, and they wanted to give
me fifteen years in prison for this. I didn't even
look at the cash register. It was my first felony
arrest of all time, and it was just a cry

(20:59):
for help. But I found myself in some really big trouble. Okay,
Now I'm seeking God. I'm having all these spiritual experiences
and now I'm locked up. And I went eight months
with no drugs. Okay, And as as I'm in there,
the psychosis actually got worse, which is really strange. Usually
when you take meth out of the equation, then you

(21:22):
heal and get better. But after about ninety days, if
you don't come out, usually you're cooked for life. Like
you never come out, you'll live your entire life in
a state hospital.

Speaker 4 (21:30):
Right, So let me comment on that a second. What
I saw when I in the prison was the prisoners
would say they you'd mess. They'd start hearing voices and
they'd go, oh, that's just a hallucination. When I come down,
it'll go away. And it does. Now that might happen five, ten, fifteen,
twenty fifty times, and then one day it doesn't. Those

(21:50):
voices are there and they are just as nuts as
anybody else in that psychiatric hospital. And it's permanent, it's
not going anywhere. It's meth induced psychosis. I've never seen
any other drug do that.

Speaker 3 (22:03):
And and and what we've came up with, you know,
the best way I can describe this as meth does
something chemically to the human mind that we don't understand
a lot about the brain that opens you wide open
to the supernatural realm. And it's never good. It's always negative.
It's always the devil. It's always like suicide and terrible thoughts,

(22:25):
right Jerry, Like the schizophrenic voices that people are hearing
have actual personalities, right Jerry. I mean it's people see
shadowy figures called the shadow, people with glowing eyes, usually
green or red, right and and and that's what they see.
So really, I mean they call it the devil's drug,

(22:45):
and it's not a mistake. I mean, you are wide
open to the supernatural realm.

Speaker 4 (22:50):
It opens up your spirit to psychic attack like no
other drug I've ever seen.

Speaker 3 (22:56):
There's nothing like it. I've done every drug known to man,
and I'm telling you, crystal math is a different beast
and it opens you up straight to the devil. I mean,
I'm talking jaw dropping, vulgar displays of power. And it
turns out it wasn't just me. There's millions of people
all over the globe. I get messages from South Africa,
from Brisbane, Australia, New Zealand, Europe, Germany, like the United Kingdom,

(23:21):
Canada coast to coast, the United States, all these people
having the same delusions or spiritual experiences. Now, is it
a mass delusion or is it something more?

Speaker 4 (23:33):
Okay?

Speaker 3 (23:33):
So that's what they run themselves.

Speaker 4 (23:35):
They run the same patterns over and over. There's like
twenty three patterns that they run. Now, the psychiatric mafia
is telling everybody, including their medical students, that these are
auditory and visual hallucinations. But the auditory, if they're running patterns,
they can't be hallucinations. Hallucinations don't run patterns. And I've

(23:57):
spoken to schizophrenics on both sides, to the United States
and some times in between. Those patterns are the same
for all of them. It's almost like they're made in
some kind of cosmic cookie cutter. Yeah, but they're always negative.
They're anti religious there, they're parasites. They sucked the energy
out of people.

Speaker 2 (24:16):
Patrick were you and voices as.

Speaker 3 (24:21):
I was having some auditory stuff. But I mean it
was a full gambit for me. It was like the
veil to the supernatural world was lifted from my eyes.
Crazy stuff. Like they diagnosed me later on with bipolar
one disorder. It was a mixed misdiagnosis. But what they
do is they diagnose you just so they can throw
you on a pill real quick. So I but yet

(24:43):
I saw clouds breaking apart and forming hearts like I mean,
I was having I thought I could look at something
and tell the value of that object. I thought I
had supernatural powers. I mean, but I was like seeing
things and then they would happen. It was It's a wild,
wild experience. And it's not just me. There's so many

(25:04):
people that have had the same thing. And I'm in
jail now. The other thing is like, why is it
God and the devil? Why is it always the dark entities?
But then God shows up and gives you this crossroads
moment for a way out, because it was like right
near the end where I was having my arrest, it
was like God was trying to come in and touch

(25:25):
my life and and he wanted me to like see
the other side of things. During this whole experience, it
was really wild. And Jerry, when these voices hear the
twenty third psalm.

Speaker 4 (25:39):
Oh yeah, they don't.

Speaker 3 (25:40):
It's like worms on a frying pan you said in
your book, right, And it's like, why would a delusion
care about the twenty third psalm? It makes no sense?
And why are we all having the same parallel, exact
experience in this vast, huge world?

Speaker 4 (25:56):
And then why are they always negative? I mean, why
aren't they rand? If they were hallucinations, they would be
random like all other hallucinities. They're not just like you said,
they're consistently, persistently predictively negative. It's always rotten stuff. You're
no good, you're ugly, you're stupid, nobody likes you, You're
every rotten thing that you can think of. Is what

(26:17):
they tell the person. They're wanting to generate that negative
emotional energy, which is what they feed off of. That's
their loosh, that's their food.

Speaker 3 (26:26):
So I'm I'm so crazy. While I'm a waiting trial
right like I'm seeing doctors, I'm seeing my lawyer. By chance,
God had given me the number two pay attorney in
the whole city of Corpus Christie to be my public defender.
I want him in a lottery. I almost fired the
guy too because I was so crazy, which I'm like, wow,

(26:47):
that could have gone a totally different way, right, So
I go and uh, I am so crazy. Okay. I
have this delusion now where I get this thing in
my head where if I read the Holy Bible, old
man slid me a ratty old Bible underneath it, and
I was in solitary confinement twenty three hours a day
in an eight x ten cell, I was out of

(27:08):
my mind. But I read the New Testament three times,
thinking that if I found something in there, they would
know that I learned it, and they would wrap the
movie and I'd get let up. That's the delusion, right,
So but I'm absorbing. I'm absorbing the word of God.
So now we're eight and a half months in. They
already rejected my insanity defense because in the United States

(27:28):
of America, if you're on drugs, it's like drunk driving.
If you ingest something that makes you crazy and it's
not an Axis one diagnosis, and insanity defense is completely
out the window. So let's put this in perspective before
we get to the institution. One percent of felons who
go before a judge actually get an insanity defense. Even

(27:48):
heard twenty four percent of the one percent, So less
than a quarter of one percent beat an insanity trial.
And drugs disqualify you. Okay, they'll go your Facebook to
see if drugs were involved in your story, anything that
they can to throw this out right, because the trial
costs a lot of money. It costs you about a
million bucks to house somebody. So I go to bed

(28:12):
one night and I am talking to the weather man
on TV. They let me out for one hour at
about three am, and we're having a conversation as real
as US three right here. Okay, he's talking to me,
I'm talking back. I went to bed and I woke
up and I was completely healed like I am today. Okay,
it was. They could not explain it. They tried to

(28:33):
put it in perspective later on. But two months later
I go to trial and my lawyer I call him
at four o'clock in the afternoon. I have a bench
trial at eight o'clock in the morning, and I get up.
I call him. It's four in the afternoon, and he goes,
I'm sorry, mister dark and they're asking fifteen years TDC.
Now I'm thinking I'm gonna get probation or something. It's

(28:54):
my first felony. Nothing happened, but they wanted to make
an example out of me that you can't go into
McDonald's with a huge butcher knife and take a burger
at knife point.

Speaker 4 (29:03):
Right.

Speaker 3 (29:03):
So I wake up and I go through this leaky
tunnel in the morning and I walked through and I'm shackled.
There was eleven other men in me twelve men. That
was very symbolic to me later on, and I counted
them and we went up in the courtroom and my
lawyer said, come on, he goes, we beat the case.
We beat the case. We went in the side room.
I said, what do you mean we beat the case?

(29:24):
He said, I was at the DA's office after hours.
I had your files in my briefcase because he was
getting prepared for court. The next morning. The DA caseload
had switched by chance, by chance, I mean by god.
So I got a brand new DA and my lawyer's like, hey,
I got this crazy guy tomorrow. Here's his medical files.
And the guy goes, yeah, we'll push it through. And

(29:46):
he said, don't say a word. Yes, And he's like,
just go up and see the judge. It's yes, yes,
your honor, no, your honor, and that's it. And they
she slammed the gavel and signed it into law. And
I beat that case that aggravated armed robbery with the
the attachments of assault with the deadly weapon on not
guilty by reason of insanity, one of the rarest court
findings that a person can get. Jeffrey Dahmer was too

(30:10):
seen for an insanity defense. Let's put that in perspective. Yeah,
it's a very rare outcome. So my lawyer, he's one
of the best there is in the whole city, and
this finding is so rare. He doesn't really know what happens.
Next he tells me, he goes, Okay, the next step
is they're gonna get you a bed. You're gonna go
up to the state hospital. He goes, thirty days. He goes,

(30:30):
you're not because now he knows I'm healed. Behind the scenes,
he's like, thirty days, you're gonna be home. So about
a month later, I get on a bus and we
go to Vernon, Texas. This is in a chapter in
the book called Dark Days Asylum Nights. It could be
its own movie. Okay, so I'm on the bus to
Vernon and I get off the bus. I called it Mars.

(30:51):
It's out in the middle of nowhere. It's it's Vernon, Texas.
There's gun tarots, razor wired looks like a prison in
the middle of nowhere. Okay on the outside, but then
you go inside and it looks like a doctor's office.
You ever seen those patent leather green chairs with the
like their couches with like the wood frame and all that.
That's exactly what it looks like. There's a medline with

(31:14):
it's like bulletproof glass in a nurse's station designed for
just handing out pills. That's all it is. So my
first night on the tier, I get there five minutes in,
they take my blood. They're doing like they're doing the experiments,
like they want to test you for HIV, hepatitis anything.
There's a CDC lab on site at Vernon, Okay, so

(31:38):
god knows what they do at that place. Okay, I
mean it's a CDC lab from the government inside this
test facility slash mental institution for the criminally insane, right,
so who knows what they do. So the first night
I saw a guy come out on the tier and
another patient walked up and just crushed his face. His

(31:58):
nose broke, it does, And this is where I saw
the restraints policy. I'm about to give you a bird's
eye view of what these state hospital facilities are really
like from the inside out. Okay, So the guy hits him,
and this is the first time I saw this nurse
behind the nurses station in the fridge, they keep these

(32:19):
syringe needles preloaded. They have a cocktail in them of
I believe it's ben a drill Atavan and four zin.
It's like a triple cocktail. And they come up and
put it in the meteor right your shoulder, right here,
and they plunge that thing and they go out and
they put him in a chair. Restrain here, Restrain here

(32:40):
around your chest, your feet, everything, and it's like a
wheelchair with straps, and they wheel you into a little
padded room and you're in there with a tech with
a clipboard. They don't move for minimum five hours. Okay,
they are out like a light. So in that high
restraints policy. Maximum security hospital. I've seen paid think about

(33:00):
getting out of pocket and they stand up and they'll
see the tech. They'll give them one warning and they'll
sit back down because nobody wants the chair. Jerry knows this.
It's really harsh and it's like people people die in
these places. I've heard of people. The medications kill you
from the time you get there. Okay.

Speaker 4 (33:20):
As Central State Hospital where I worked at a graveyard
of thirty thousand patients. That's crazy, thirty thousand and three
different separate graveyards.

Speaker 3 (33:30):
Now this place is co ed. This place is male
and female patients now are yes, and you're talking the
herders of women and children. These are people too crazy
for the Texas prison system. And this is what it's
like all over the country. You're talking true blue serial killers,
like where they have everything lined up in their room

(33:50):
perfect and they look like the kindest person you've ever seen,
and then you hear their rap sheet and you are
just mind blown. Now the text will tell you what
everybody's crime is, even though that's against hip or rightly no,
but patient patient relationships with female texts and stuff going

(34:11):
on totally illegal, like this place is wild. Now. Vernon
has two movie theaters. They have a restaurant where you
can get a heck of a cheeseburger a lot better
than the one I got at the McDonald's. I can
assure you that. Okay, So you're sitting in there watching
like Police Academy or whatever they're showing that night, and
you're sitting next to a guy who you know, for effect,

(34:31):
strangled his wife with panteos. Yes, it's they have popcorn machines.
It's it's a demonic fun out. It's crazy day two,
Day two. I'm in there. They dirkin new meds and
I'm like, I don't take noon meds. I was like,
I only take nighttime meds. You know. They had me
on like a couple of pills in jail. I go

(34:52):
up there, there was like a bucket of pills and
I'm like, I don't take noon medz. Nigga, you're taking them.
These are your pills. And I'm like, maybe they're vitamins
or something.

Speaker 2 (35:00):
I tell you what you were taking.

Speaker 3 (35:02):
No, they first of all, this was the wrong person's pills.
They forced me to take this, I mean bucket of pills.
So I swallow it down. I go back to my bed.
All of a sudden, like maybe twenty thirty minutes later,
my heart starts pounding out of my chest. One of
the side effects. They almost killed me right here. Drool,
buckets of drool. I've never experienced anything like it in

(35:25):
my life. Whoever they were giving those pills to must
have been a doozy. I've done it, yeah, and I've
done every drug known demand in huge quantities at this point,
and I've have you ever seen The Walking Dead where
the zombies on the ground and he's crawling with his
arms because he didn't have a bottom half. I was
doing that back to the medline and I'm crawling and

(35:46):
they dragged me back to my bed and just threw
me back in there to sleep it off. Okay, So
then I wake up and I'm on nine medications. Now okay,
now these are pills that I don't really need. Okay,
I'm completely healed from the met psychosis, and they're just
prescribing me whatever's on the menu. See, these reps will
come in, and that's who you do see come in,

(36:08):
is you see the farmer reps coming in. They'll come in,
they'll go to the doctor's station. Now, what do you
think when you think of a state hospital, You think
that people are there to get therapy, They're there to
get better, they're doing working out issues. No, I've never seen.
I lived in the state hospital system in Texas for
eight and a half months. I never, not one time

(36:29):
saw the doctors walk out on to the actual floor
and talk to people or do any kind of one
on one treatment. You had one treatment team meeting per week,
and it's only to check the levels of your medication.
Now they have me on lithium. So they were drawing
blood once a week too, because they have to. Yeah,
and I felt like I was under chemo therapy. Some

(36:52):
of these drugs, you start stuttering, like I could I
could hear my thought what I wanted to get out,
but i've and I couldn't even speak. Now I'm totally normal,
but these drugs are like reversing me back worse than
when I was in addition, nuts, you.

Speaker 4 (37:06):
Know, they want no trouble out of the patient population,
so they drug them silly. Yeah, the whole population is
drugged with something and much easier to manage.

Speaker 3 (37:17):
And if and if sarah Quill is what's on the
menu and what's popping and hot that week for the
farmer reps, then everybody's on sarah quill. Do you think
it's a coincidence everybody needs sarah quill instead of drazinone
And then they'll swap it back and it's like it's
just it's just a consumer product and they're giving it
out and these drugs are actually killing us from the

(37:40):
inside out.

Speaker 4 (37:40):
Yeah, Steph, we'd love the farmer reps because they'd always
pay for lunch for us. If we just came to
listen to them, you got you know, good food. We
didn't have to pay for it. We just listened to
their bull crap for a while. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (37:55):
So I'm healed now, right, so I start forming a plan.
I'm like, okay, I've only got a month or so.
Here two and a half months go by and I'm
devising a plant. I'm like, I'm a model patient. It's
really a prisoner, but they call us patients. Now, I
want you to understand this. The reason why nobody ever
leaves the state hospital system in Texas or anywhere else,
why it's almost impossible to get out, is because they

(38:16):
get paid eleven Now, this is back in twenty nineteen.
They were getting eleven hundred and fifty dollars per day
per patient. You could look it up online. I did
it later on while I was locked up, and it's like,
and then now you've got a pod of forty people,
and you've got eight to ten pods on a unit.
How much money is that per year? It's millions of dollars. Okay,

(38:38):
So I passed what's called the danger Review board, which
means that you can step down if you're a good
boy or girl, you can step down into a less
restrictive hospital, where like the restraints policy goes away. Okay,
So it sounds like a good thing. Now your mom
or dad can send you care packages, all these extra perks.

(38:59):
So I pass and I'm shipped down to San Antonio
State Hospital. So I'm thinking, Okay, the rest of this
will be a cakewalk. I've got about ten days and
I'm going home. My lawyer's telling me this. He's like,
you're gonna go to this next place, They're gonna evaluate you,
and you're out of there. The first day. I meet
a maniacal doctor, this lady, and she tells me, she says,

(39:20):
mister Durkin. She goes ten more days through another month.
She's like, the average safety evaluation it takes three and
a half to five years once you get to this part. Oh,
And I'm like, are you kidding me? I can't live
in hell for another three and a half to five years.
I was like, I got to get out of here.
So I'm in there, and I now my spirit's crushed, right,

(39:43):
I'm like, I'm you're living in hell. Think about the
craziest thing or story you've ever heard times ten on acid,
and that's what you're hearing from other patients all day.
Child abduction and terrible torture, and these are just illusions.
These are demons speaking through these people.

Speaker 4 (40:04):
Yeah, you're you're playing.

Speaker 3 (40:05):
Chess with the guy who killed his wife.

Speaker 4 (40:08):
And the psychiatrists are not the top top of the notch. No,
we had one. This was We had one guy. They
called him doctor Freud. He worked in one of the
psychiatric units. He dressed like Freud, he had a pipe
like Freud, he walked around like Freud, he acted like Freud. Wow,
And and one of his patients really got pissed off

(40:30):
at him, you know. And what they taught us in
graduate school is that schizophrenics were too disorganized to plan
anything that was real, you know, detailed. They're serious, this guy,
this this one patient who hated this doctor because he
did exactly to this guy what you know, Patrick is

(40:50):
saying that they did to him. They just drowned him
with site pills. And the more he acted up, the
more that they they fed him. So he got fed up.
One night, he he slipped out of his room and
he got past two nursing stations, went down to the
first floor where doctor Freud's office was picked the lock

(41:11):
got up on his desk, crapped in the middle of
his desk and shaped it into a pipe like the
pipe that doctor Freud's and then he escaped from the
hospital and they never found it there.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
Wow, pretty creative. And let's and I was in an
arc class one day. They have like once in a
great while to have an activity. This This lady who's
been at the hospital forever, tells me this story. Now
I'm in this other wing of the hospital now where
we go to the arts and craft stuff, and they're like,
they give you like cotton balls and glue and stuff.
It's nothing crazy because people would be killing each other

(41:45):
right if you had scissors and stuff. So I was
in there and this lady's telling me this story. There's
pictures on the wall from like the eighteen hundreds. San
Antonio State Hospital was like this draconian brick building and
they built onto it, but the original building looked something
out of a horror movie. And she was telling me
this story. She goes, you see those pictures, Now, these

(42:06):
are people with like vacant stairs, real patients in these
old black and white photos. They were brilliantly framed still
on the walls. She goes, what they used to do
here at the hospital was they would send like the
less desirable of the family. So the elites of San
Antonio were sending their homosexual, alcoholic, pregnant teenage daughters there. Whatever. Right,

(42:30):
They would take a metal hook as spike with a
little tiny hook on the end of it. They would
shove it into their eyeball and scramble the front of
their brain and pull it out. It was a frontal
lobe lobotomy, right, Jerry, is that that's accurate?

Speaker 4 (42:45):
That's accurate what they had. They did have a lobotoming
bobile to drove around the United States to all these
different towns and administer those lobotomies and electroshock.

Speaker 3 (42:57):
They had a whole room.

Speaker 4 (42:59):
Oh yeah, I remember seeing one of those.

Speaker 2 (43:02):
I mean it was like, and how long ago was
this still going on?

Speaker 4 (43:06):
This was they're well, they're doing it right now, not
as bad as in the days when I was there.

Speaker 3 (43:12):
Now they're doing it with pills. That's the only difference.

Speaker 4 (43:15):
Now they're still using shop machines. Oh wow, they're not
like the ones I saw that where they let me
tell you what ect looked like. Okay, we only saw
one and I almost feigned and I got a strong stomach. So,
you know, a friend called me and said, hey, they're
doing a demonstration over here, come on over and watch it,

(43:36):
and I've never seen one. So it went over there,
and here's this this foreign doctor, I don't know. He was,
you know, Cuban or from some other country. And here
he's lecturing this bunch of students, like like he was
on TV or something. You know, it's like he was
getting off on this and he was explaining, you know,
what was going to happen and what had happened. And

(43:59):
he started showing these electrodes. They were about this big around,
you know, like about an inch square, just wires running
to them and you know, a slab of metal, and
I'm going Then he greased them with some kind of
gel and I asked him, I said, well, what's that for?
And he said, well, that's to help the electricity pass through.

(44:21):
If we didn't put that gel on there, the electricity
would burn their heads, that would burn their skin. So
I watched him. Grise sat up, and then he was
talking about something else. And they finally brought in the
patient and there was this frail old lady who could
barely walk. She was hanging onto two nurses and she
was heading for that gurney like she'd done this before,

(44:45):
and she automatically just sat down on the gurney, just
like a good girl, very frail, couldn't walk hardly by herself,
lay down on the gurney and then they started strapping
her down with these metal straps, kind of like with
your wheelchair thing. Legs were strapped, the thighs were strapped,
the chest was strapped, the rest of arms were strapped.
I'm going, well, why are you doing that? They go, well,

(45:08):
when we give her the shock, we didn't do that,
she could break bones when she convulsed.

Speaker 3 (45:13):
Oh wow.

Speaker 4 (45:14):
And I'm like, thinking a treatment that breaks bones, you know.
And they strapped her down, and then finally, when they
got all ready, they got this big horse needle. It
was about that big around about that long. I mean,
it was the biggest needle I ever saw. And it
had this white, milky fluid in it. I asked the psychiatrist,
I said, what's that for. That's a muscle relax. If

(45:38):
we didn't give her that, she would break her bones
within the straps.

Speaker 3 (45:41):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (45:42):
And I watched how he did it. He stuck it
in her vein. He did just push it in there.
He squished it back and forth and mixed it with
blood and then pushed it slowly in there, and I'm like,
oh wow.

Speaker 3 (45:53):
And the barbary yeah yeah.

Speaker 4 (45:56):
And he's like getting off on this, you know, he said,
he reminds me of one of those snake oil salesmen
upon this, you know stage, trying to sell snake oil.

Speaker 3 (46:05):
That's a mad scientist, Jerry.

Speaker 4 (46:11):
So he backs everybody away from the guarny and he says,
I'm not ready to minister the shock, you know now.

Speaker 3 (46:17):
They The thing about it is like some of these
people are really dangerous human beings. Okay, some are not.
You've got a various spectrum. You've got like people who
are don't you know, mentally challenged, and then you've got
these top tier evil villain types.

Speaker 4 (46:33):
Oh yeah.

Speaker 3 (46:34):
There was one guy I was in there with. Later
on I find out he was so dangerous that with
the first day I saw him, I looked down at
his leg and he had an ankle monitor inside the institution.
He was too crazy for prison, and they put him
in the mental institution and they put an ankle monitor
on him so that if he got off property and

(46:55):
hopped the wall, they didn't want to take any chances.
He had violent sexual thoughts. Rage, violent thoughts, every waking moment.
That's what his court documents. Right now, let me.

Speaker 4 (47:07):
Let me finish this shock story. Oh yeah, So they
injected this huge needle into her and she she kind
of passed out. He cleared the table and he goes, okay,
I'm ready to give her the shot. Don't you get
away from the gurney. And they did, and she just
right within within those straps. It looked like she was
going to break those straps loose. She was just convulsing

(47:28):
in there. And I was just looking at that and
I was shocked, you know. And then I'm going like,
how long is this going to go on? Because she's
just jerking around in these straps, and it just seemed
like it went on forever. Finally he shut it off
and he starts talking again like the salesman. And I'm
looking at this poor little old lady, and she's turning syanautic.

(47:48):
She's dead, she's on her way out. She's purple. And
finally i'd stop him and I'd say, hey, she's turning cyanautic,
and he goes, like an afterthought, he goes, oh, and
he grabs these you know, these chest shock or things,
you know, and he puts them on her chest and
he gives her a shock and she comes back alive again.
And after that I almost feigned. And they were doing

(48:11):
three thousand of these every year at Central State Housepital,
three thousand each one was showing measurable neurological damage to
the brain a neurologist, because after one shock, a neurologists
could see the damage that it was doing to their brain. Wow,
this is the psychiatric mafia's you know, bull crap. And

(48:35):
was anybody being cured by that? No? You know who
was picking the ones who were getting the shocks or
the attendants who were saying, Oh, this guy's been misbehaving
on this word, I think he needs a shock treatment.
They were using it as punishment.

Speaker 3 (48:49):
And San Antonio is less restrictive, so there's no restraints policy,
so when I get there, there is more violence. I
was on the crocket unit at San Antonio State Hospital.
You'd be sitting down and a girl would walk up
and break some guy's nose right while he's watching TV.
She's having a delusion. Now, if you're in the commission
of an assault, you could be beating somebody to death.

(49:11):
And if they staff came over. If you threw your
hands up and went like this, they can't touch you
or else. Staff would face criminal charges. So the violence
was out of control. Sexual assaults, males, sneaking into the
female bathrooms. I would shower and you're in there with
with real top level evil pedophiles, and you'd be taking

(49:34):
a shower washing yourself and they would walk by and
they would look at you, and you can't do anything
if you show any signs of aggression. Boom, another six
months on your sentence, safety evaluation, another six months. So
you had to just take this stuff right. So they
had me on nine pills, and I remember my male
parts stopped working altogether, your normal functions, if you know

(49:56):
what I mean, stop working. And I marched into the
doctor's office. I was like, this is where I draw
the line.

Speaker 4 (50:01):
Man.

Speaker 3 (50:01):
I'm like, I'm not taking these anymore. I talked to
this doctor and I got him to agree. He's like,
why should I take you off your medication. He's like,
everyone's on medication, and I told him. I was like, listen, man,
I was on drugs for two and a half, almost
three years straight on math before I did this crime.
I said, I got healed when I was in jail
and they gave me this court finding and I came

(50:22):
here and he's like what. He's like, what are you
talking about? He goes, you were on drugs and he
started to like get really alarmed. They called my social
worker and I'm terrified at this point because I think
they're gonna overturn my case and send me to prison.
And I didn't understand the law. I'm not a lawyer.
I didn't know about double jeopardy and all that. So
it's already signed in the law. They couldn't do anything right.

(50:44):
So he takes me off these pills. This was a
huge part of me getting out. He says, I'm gonna
give you a four month period. I'm gonna do this
safety valuation with no medication, and if you have no
outburst or violent behavior, I'll leave you off the medication
for the duration that you're here. And I did, and
I got off the pills. In two weeks after he
took me off the pills, the doctor died.

Speaker 4 (51:06):
Whoa wow.

Speaker 3 (51:07):
Yes, he was like an older guy and he had
a heart attack and he died. But he already signed
it into my chart and it was already good. So
I start devising a plan. I'm like, okay, I'm gonna
get out of here. And I started witnessing the atrocities
behind the four walls of this hospital. Now clients writes.
There's a client's rights handbook. It's about seventy five pages

(51:28):
or one hundred pages long. I read it like a
hundred times. You can't force patients to take showers or baths,
so they're defecating, they're urinating, and they're just sitting there.
This is somebody's daughter or son, and they're sitting in
their own feces. Their jeans would turn brown and different
colors from the grime. These are people's kids, and they're
walking around stinking, okay, and which is abuse. Okay, that's

(51:53):
abuse to a mentally challenged patient. So I start seeing
all this and I see these I saw this one
guy from Corpus Chris, where I'm from. He went out
underneath this oak tree and he beat this girl half
to death. He was kicking her in the face. He
went on a tangent rage for about forty five minutes
inside the unit. After nobody could touch him. She was
in a wheelchair for about a month after this incident,

(52:16):
I have a journal. I'm taking down names, dates, times,
the names of the victims, getting information. So I'm keeping
these journals. And along the way, I figured out that
my mom could send me a cell phone if she
had the place. Take the cell phone store, take the
camera out of it. I could have a device legally

(52:37):
with inside the walls of this place.

Speaker 4 (52:40):
I'm on a camera.

Speaker 3 (52:42):
You can't have a camera because of Hippa. But I
had a phone. I had Facebook, I had YouTube, Google,
email and everything to the outside world. Now my mom
actually did it. She went from down to Myrtle Beach
mailed me the phone. I got it. So I was
there one day and this is where it takes turn.
I'm I'm in the crocket unit. Everyone's pounding on the

(53:04):
plate glass windows. It was like a zoo. They were
like throwing a mini riot this day, but it looked
like chimpanzees heavily medicated, just throwing this huge fit. And
I raised my voice and I got out of pocket,
and I started screaming, because after a while you'll crack
mentally because of all the crazy stuff. I mean. I
had a transgender roommate and he would start screaming at

(53:30):
the top of his lungs at about ten pm all
throughout the night, so I had to learn how to
sleep like that. So you're you're mentally cracking slowly over
a period of time. So I raised my voice. This
nurse comes up and she says, mister Durkin. She goes,
you're taking the medication, She goes, and if you don't,
we're going to inject you with it. And if that happens,
it's a minimum six months tacked onto your safety evaluation

(53:54):
because now you're showing aggressive behavior. I was a forty
six seed. It's very bad to show aggress behavior because
you're basically there. Essentially you're trying to prove that you're sane,
and they can hold you for the duration of the
top punishment of your crime, which for me was ninety
nine years, so any hiccups, I could potentially be there

(54:16):
the rest of my life. It was like the spirit
of God. It was something out of a movie. She
comes up to me and she knows. All the staff
knows that I'm completely normal now right now, I'm not
even on medication. I'm acting totally normal like I am today.
And they all felt bad for me. And she came
up to me and she says, you know what. She goes,
if you calm down right now, I'll leave this out
of your chart. She goes, I won't give you the medication,

(54:38):
but you have to calm down right now. And I said, okay.
She turned to walk away, and then she spun around
and I'll never forget this, she goes, mister Darkin, if
you don't like the way things are in this place,
I suggest you write a letter, and if you do,
I'll take it up to the White House myself. Now,
the White House it was it was the nickname for
the administrative building. Okay, we're all the top brass and

(55:00):
the hospital is. A doctor up there is so powerful.
With one stroke of his pen, no matter what your
crime is, he could release you from the state hospital
back in his society. So I did. I sat down
and I wrote a four page letter in five minutes.
And I said, I used to be in business. I'm
well spoken, I'm not on any medication. I have a
cell phone with access to the outside world. And I said,

(55:23):
the longer that you keep me in this hospital, I'm
going to be a problem from your evil, corrupt system.
And I started naming off all these events and names
of people that I had kept track of. She took
it up there and they actually read a letter from
a crazy person, right and they held this meeting and
sent me to a different unit. Like I thought it

(55:44):
was in retaliation, but they sent me to the Crockett unit.
They were devising a plan to release me right then
and there. They're like, we've got this guy in here's
witnessing all the stuff about the druggings, the beatings, the molestations.
There was one station case where the guy with the
ankle monitor, he was bribing patients to go into the

(56:07):
bathroom and they were doing with whatever together. Okay, they
had the mind of children. One of them was an
HIV positive patient. He was a male prostitute on the street.
And I had big care packages. My mom was sending
me tons of chocolate, chips, sodas, everything. I bribed the
victim one of them for his sister's phone number, and

(56:28):
I got on the hospital phone, cordless phone, and I
called her and I said, this is what's happening to
your brother. You need to call up there. And they
verified the story. They tried to cover it up. They
didn't want the bad press, so Adult Protective Services sworn.
I wrote twelve letters in all everywhere they moved me.
God would have this amazing thing pop off, and it

(56:49):
gave me the opportunity to cause a big problem for
this hospital. Right, So the last, the final straw was
now they're trying to release me. At this point, I'm
at the very end. My roommate was this very dangerous,
terrible human being. He threatened to kill his family. He
had a wife and small child. They would come to

(57:10):
see him on visits and he's on the phone. The
hospital heard him threaten. The family said I'm gonna kill
you when I get out of here, and they covered
it up, didn't do anything. And a week later he
was I was underneath the oak tree outside and I
was on a bench. He comes up to me and
he says, I'm gonna go get this twenty grand man
and I'm gonna get out of here. And You're like, yeah, whatever, man,

(57:31):
everybody's so crazy, right. He hopped the wall about twenty
minutes later, and he just walked right off the property
because they didn't close the gates. He walked right through
an apartment community where kids played and just walked off
and he was missing. So I'm waiting for the news
story and everything. Now they reported it to the cops,
but not to the people of San Antonio, that there's

(57:53):
this violent, insane patient walking around the city. So I
had my phone and the Holy Spirit told send a
message to the news station and I got ahold of
ten's five San Antonio. Now you can look this up
on YouTube. San Antonio State Hospital escape. I broke this
story while I was inside the institution.

Speaker 2 (58:13):
That's great.

Speaker 3 (58:14):
So they messaged me back and they were like, you
can't have a phone inside the State hospital. And I
dropped a GPS pin and they were like, what's this
guy's name, We're gonna call up there. They verified the story.
They ran this huge hit piece on the hospital that night.
The next day they did a huge expose. There was
like nine escapes the previous year that never got reported

(58:35):
this to the public. One guy chopped his wife up
into a thousand pieces. He was one of the people
who walked off. Yes, so they were building a brand
new hospital, a three hundred and eighty million dollar addition
to San Antonio State Hospital, all publicly funded by the
police department and all these other public entities, University of
Texas and all this they didn't want any bad press,

(58:57):
and within a month they had kicked me out of
their when I was a free man with absolutely no
criminal record of any kind. That's great, and I got
this story, this bird's eye view of the atrocities happening
behind the walls. I mean, you're talking about less stations
and worse violence to the I mean, patient on patient

(59:17):
crime is not prosecuted. So if I beat you halfway
to death, the police come up and take a report,
but then you have to wait till you get out
years later. Now these people have the mind of an
eight year old child. They don't even remember what happened
to them last week. They have to go down and
file formal charges years after the fact. These places are

(59:38):
an absolute for profit experiment for the government of the
United States.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
And Jerry, you said, this stuff is still going on.
There are places that operate in this manner all across
the United States. You'd say, well.

Speaker 4 (59:55):
Well, to what Patrick is saying is kind of like
the worst end though. You know, I worked at Central
State Hospital in Central Georgia for seven years, and some
of the backwards were that bad, But for the most
part they weren't. They weren't as violent as that. You know,

(01:00:18):
there were some bad stuff happened. I remember one guy,
one patient, the ceiling caved in one day because there
were so many termites that the ceiling just fell in
on him with thousands of termites fell on him. You know.
The paint paint was, you know, peeling off the walls.

(01:00:38):
There were salts. It was interesting because psychiatrists were getting
assaulted there more than any other staff except attendance staff,
who were with these people twenty four hours a day.
And I'm like, like, like Patrick said, they bring you in,
they say how are you doing. You're hearing voices started
at how's your meds? You know, if you have any complaints,

(01:01:00):
they'll increase your mets.

Speaker 3 (01:01:02):
And in the news report that I broke, you can
see they have a picture of the bent over fence
and on there's a banner on it and it said
now hiring twelve dollars an hour. That's how much they
were paying the text to live in there, ten twelve
hours a day with this environment.

Speaker 4 (01:01:18):
Yeah, yeah, they were. They were low paid.

Speaker 3 (01:01:22):
Yeah, but it's one of the lowest funded states for
state hospital in the nation. I think, behind like Mississippi.
I believe that's it.

Speaker 4 (01:01:30):
I remember that there was one guy. He was a
thin black guy, and he was on the second floor
of the Psychiandy I worked gone, and he was shadow
boxing every day when I can't was doing my rounds.
His shadow boxing up and down this corridor. Yeah, and
I'm like, you know, hey, Ruben, what's the deal. He's

(01:01:52):
training for the fight? Who are you going to fight?
Can't tell you. Next day, same thing, shadow boxing up
and down. Uh. That went on for about a week.
And uh, then one day I'm up there and I'm
in the day room and there's the psychiatrist is coming
up the stairwell onto the onto the floor where the

(01:02:14):
nursing station is. It just tops the stairs. He walks
into the day room just and this guy comes shooting
out of one of the wards like a cannon ball.
Went runs right up to him and just taxing just
knocks him cold. He fell to the floor. And then, uh,
you know, I'm like, oh my god. Then then the

(01:02:34):
next day I saw that guy. He's he's slumped up
against the wall. He's drooling, Like Patrick said, you know,
he's drooling. And I go the sherman, what, uh what
happened to you? And he goes, damn doctor grat.

Speaker 3 (01:02:50):
Me, you know.

Speaker 4 (01:02:52):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, if they if they got into any trouble, boy,
they would just drug them silly.

Speaker 3 (01:02:57):
Yeah, that that maniacal doctor who gave me the bad
news about the three and a half to five years
my transgender roommate laid her out cold. Yeah, the doctors
get attacked because the patients think that the doctors are
behind everything and it's the drugging, and so there's a
lot of resentment. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:03:15):
I had one patient who had gone off her med
She was doing good in the vocational class she was in.
She it was her third time she went off, and
if they go off three times, we had to discharge them.
So her mother said, the police don't do that. I
can't deal with her. I'll come up there. We'll talk
to her. And we asked her. Both of us were
begging her, why did you go off your medge? You

(01:03:36):
know what happens when you go off your mede She said,
you won't believe me. I said, try me. I've seen
some really weird stuff since i've been here. I don't
think anything you say is going to throw me out
of kilter. And she goes. The voices told me that
the doctors were poisoning me, and they were pointing to
the side effects of the drugs as the toxic reaction
of the poison and that was technically it's true. Nasty

(01:04:00):
side effects are toxic effects of those drugs because they
are poisoned, you know. And they and here's just a
few of them. Diarrhea, drowsing, this anxiety, sleep problems, insomnia,
breast swelling or discharge, changes in the menstrual period, weight gain,

(01:04:21):
swelling the hands and feet, dry mouth, stuff, he knows,
blurred vision, you know, congestion.

Speaker 3 (01:04:30):
I'm a five time suicide survivor, and every time that
I had one of those suicide attempts to bide three
major ones. I was on the I was on antidepressants.
The number one side effect in the insert is suicidal thoughts.
It's like it's an antidepressant, but you could have major
suicidal thoughts. It's wild.

Speaker 4 (01:04:51):
And those things barely work. I mean, they work just
a lot of times, just better than a placebo.

Speaker 3 (01:04:58):
There's no such thing as a chemical and Lilly it was.

Speaker 4 (01:05:02):
It was made up by Ila Lelly. When they came
out with prozac, they needed some explanation. It was a
total lie. They knew it at the time they started
teaching it in the universities. They pharma took over control
of that and they started teaching it to the medical students.
They're coming out of medical school believing that mental illness
is due to some kind of strange chemical imbalance of

(01:05:24):
the brain. And it's a complete lie. And they're still
pushing it today. You know, I saw an advertisement a
month ago. It says it is believed that you know,
so they're changing their wording a little bit. There is
no chemical imbalance. They've never proved it. The voices are
not hallucinations. They've done no studies on those voices at all.
They just went, we're psychiatrists. We hereby pronounced that the

(01:05:48):
voices are hallucinations, and they are because we said so.
They've done no research on it whatsoever.

Speaker 3 (01:05:53):
None, because they're really demons. And that's what it is.
There's a spiritual solution to this, and that's that. I mean,
I'm on I'm on zero pills. I have been clean
from crystal meth and alcohol and every other mind altering
terrible substance for over seven years of my life since
this all unfolded, and I am clean today. And I

(01:06:15):
help people get clean off crystal meth and other substances
all over the planet. And it's because I followed Jesus
Christ and that was the experience I had. So I
walked out of hell of meth addiction by following the
light of the Lord. And that's what helps me every
single day. And I find that most people, only two
percent of us, get and stay clean off crystal meth

(01:06:35):
for the rest of our life. And I find that
most people who've had these huge spiritual experiences on the drug,
they all follow the Lord Jesus Christ, and they're all
remaining clean for the most part. It's wild, but that's
I mean, that's the data I'm and getting. And I
have interactions with hundreds of thousands of peep gone.

Speaker 4 (01:06:53):
You know. And there's a new energetic psychotherapy that just
cut out that's a cutting edge stuff. It has two
spiritual components.

Speaker 3 (01:07:03):
Wow.

Speaker 4 (01:07:04):
If it didn't have those, it wouldn't work. It's called
the Mace Energy Method. It's cutting edge stuff. It gets
rid of most psychological problems in an hour.

Speaker 3 (01:07:16):
Wow.

Speaker 2 (01:07:16):
Yeah, we talked a little bit about that last time
you were on maybe to close out, Patrick, thank you
again for telling us your story. It's so important for
the audience to hear this. Maybe you could give us
any closing thoughts you have. If folks out there are
afflicted with something similar, what advice would you give them

(01:07:39):
on how to navigate through it? And Jerry will close
out with a little bit more about that new therapy.

Speaker 3 (01:07:48):
So my recommendation is, build a direct personal relationship with
the Lord Jesus Christ and follow the light out of
the hell that's meth addiction. You can reach me on
Boston Boston two percent, on TikTok, on on YouTube and
all other platforms Boston two percent, and you can get
fire and ice the meth Bible on Amazon dot com.

(01:08:10):
You can just simply search the meth Bible, but find
something greater than yourself and follow that and watch miracles happen.

Speaker 2 (01:08:18):
Awesome, wonderful. And Jerry tell us a little bit more
about that new therapy before we close out.

Speaker 4 (01:08:24):
Yeah, Mace, it's a it's an energetic psychotherapy. It's not
a talk therapy, so it works with energy. And like
I said, I've been on the front lines of mental
health for close to fifty years. I've never seen anything
work like this as quickly as it does with permanent results.
It's a and what's even more fascinating about it is

(01:08:47):
the therapist that's not It goes after a trauma, because
most psychological trauma UH problems are due to some kind
of trauma that gets buried in the subconscious and then
it becomes what they call a negative identity. So it's
like a mind virus. It's kind of like a computer
virus works in the background, but it's during a trauma.

(01:09:09):
What happens. You have this awful, bad feeling that just
stays there and torments you. And there's a decision that
you make with regard to the part that you played
in that trauma, you know, and it might be something
like this thing happened to me, so I'm worthless, which
is one of the most common ones I run into.
So I'm dealing with these people that something happened to

(01:09:29):
them when they were six years old. Their mom did
something or said something, or something happened, and due to that,
they decided when they were six years old that they
were worthless. And here they are now seventy five, and
they're still feeling worthless. In an hour, that's gone. Wow,
after all those years, it's gone. They feel lighter, they

(01:09:50):
feel more grounded. So what it does is it operates
kind of like if you get a brand new car battery,
you charge full and you drain that battery down to nothing.
That battery is a boat anchor. You cannot recharge it again.
So what MACE does is it finds this negative identity
that was buried into subconscious by the ego. So what

(01:10:13):
happens is that pain from the trauma stays there for
a long time. The ego shows up and goes, this
isn't functional. It's interfering with your functioning. It's not doing
you any good. Let me handle it. Takes it throws
it into the subconscious mind, and it locks it down
so it can't get out. But it's buried alive in there.
It's trying to get out. The ego's expending energy to

(01:10:36):
keep it in. So what it acts like is like
a landmark. So it's sitting there waiting for the right
weight to come along and set it off. Now, the
right weight is somebody who's similar to the person who
caused the trauma in the first place. As soon as
one of those people walks into the person's psychological sphere,
that thing goes off, and it tells the person either

(01:10:59):
at hack that person, or run from that person, or
avoid that person. It's like the person you hate. No
matter where you go, that kind of person shows up,
shows up because you're carrying it around in your head.
So once that stuff gets locked down, it gets projected
back out. Okay, but it's still with you. So one
of the things it does is it projects it back

(01:11:21):
out onto somebody similar to the person that traumatize you.
The other thing it does is when you get into
trouble with somebody or something two or three times and
you swear to yourself, I'm never going to get into
trouble again. Six months later, you're right back there again.
You go, how the devil did I get back here?
That's that negative identity there. So it's a pool of

(01:11:42):
negative identity of negative energy. Along with a decision two
different components. MACE will identify both of them, turn them
into a physical list, and then create a structure to
the spirit. Because energy moves from negative energy to positive energy,
the spirit is positive, it creates the structure to content

(01:12:05):
connect that negative energy with spirit, and the spirit actually
transmutes it to positive energy. So it's strained just like
the car battery is. Once it's strained, it's dead, and
you can you talk to the person. You go, okay,
go back to that trauma. I want you to go
right back to where you were. What's around you, you know,
see what's happens. And you go, how do you feel

(01:12:27):
about it now? And they go, it doesn't matter. I
remember it, but it doesn't have any effect on it.
In one hour, it'll do this. I think this method
would take care of seventy five percent of what psychiatry does.
You know, with no drugs. Now that there's like like
Patrick was saying, there are those people out there. The

(01:12:47):
only way you can deal with those guys is the
drug them silly, because they're so fricking dangerous. I've seen
it in the in the hospitals. I've seen it in
the UH, in the prisons. You know, they're so dangerous
that you you have to keep them drug out.

Speaker 3 (01:13:02):
And the thing you got to remember is they don't
want anybody on the floor at those hospitals. It's very
top secret and they don't want outsiders coming in.

Speaker 4 (01:13:11):
Oh no, they don't. You try to get into one
of those places, just say hey, I'm a researcher. I'd
like to take a look and talk to some schizophrenics. No,
you're never going to get in there. You won't get
into the mental health center, you won't get into a
private psychiatric hospital, you won't get into a state hospital.
In all the years I've been working in psychiatric settings,

(01:13:31):
I have never ever even once seen any kind of
researcher on any of those units. They will not let
them in. They'll tell you, oh, it's too dangerous, or
we can't take the risk, or you know, risk management
won't allow us in.

Speaker 3 (01:13:47):
It's an experiment.

Speaker 4 (01:13:48):
And the ones that did get in, sometimes a legislature
would want to One of the legislators would want to
walk through. Boy, they were surrounded by about ten administrative staff,
and they weren't allowed to speak to any of the inmates.
They didn't want anybody that they didn't know speaking to
the prisoners or the patients. You know, like Patrick was saying,

(01:14:12):
you know, the parents never got onto the words. They
would take them out to a visiting room or something
like that, but they wouldn't ever let them see what
was actually going on on those words, the conditions under
which they were living. This is a psychiatric mafia's top institutions,
these state institutions, now the private ones are you know,

(01:14:34):
they're a lot better. You don't have that kind of
stuff going on. And the private institutions they're a lot smaller.
They get a lot more money. But what they do
is they keep those patients in there un till they
run out of insurance money and then they throw them out.
You know, none of them were getting any better. All
those psychiatric drugs do is treat symptoms. They don't get

(01:14:54):
to the cause of the matter at all. Like this
energetic psychotherapy. The name of it is because they named
it that, because it gets to the cause of the
mental problem and eliminates it and does it without any drug.

Speaker 2 (01:15:08):
Well, this is such important information, Jerry Patrick, I want
to thank you both again for coming on. We'll definitely
have to revisit this. There's so much more that we
can discuss, and like I said, it's super important to
bring the audience's attention to some of these things, because
I wasn't aware that they're still running these facilities in

(01:15:30):
any capacity the way that you have described, so it's
extremely disturbing. Before I let you go, Jerry, what was
the best way the audience can find out more about
you your website one more time.

Speaker 4 (01:15:44):
They can go to Jerrymarzinski dot com and there's a
couple of videos about the Maze Energy method there. There's
how to get involved with it there and you can
order this book from there or Amazon. This talks about
the psychotic voices. You know how we determined that these
things were not hallucinations. You know Sherry Sweening, my co

(01:16:07):
co author here, she was hearing those voices when she
was a young girl, and she kept that from me
for ten years. One day and then she one day
she told it to me. And I didn't believe it
because she's one of the most spiritual people that I know.

Speaker 3 (01:16:19):
It's an awesome book. I read it. It's awesome.

Speaker 2 (01:16:22):
All right On and Patrick, I will have links to
your book as well in the description. And did you
have a website? Uh?

Speaker 3 (01:16:31):
My big one is TikTok Boston two percent two p
rct Boston two percent on TikTok. That's where I get
the most interaction and fire and Nights. The Meth Bible
is the realist book about meth and the devil you'll
ever read. Seven hundred and sixteen pages of fire.

Speaker 2 (01:16:47):
Gentlemen, Thank you again. We'll definitely be talking in the future.
Until next time, everyone, have an excellent evening. We'll talk
again tomorrow.

Speaker 3 (01:16:55):
See how then god Ble

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Meth: the Devil's Drug, Trapped In a Nightmare Facility | Jerry Marzinsky & Patrick D

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