KCAA: Get Balanced with Dr. Marissa (Tue, 2 Sep, 2025)

KCAA: Get Balanced with Dr. Marissa on Tue, 2 Sep, 2025

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Just the time of day, Jump off that exhausting amster
wheel and into balance.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
Living with Doctor Marissa from Miss Joy. Doctor Marisa, also
known as the Asian Oprah. Her mission to be a
beneficial presence on the planet, her purpose to be your
personal advocate, to live, lap love, learn her life motto,
don't die wondering. Take back your life with Doctor Maurica Pey.

Speaker 3 (00:35):
And welcome your tune to to take my advice. I'm
not using it. Get balanced with Doctor Marissa in the
morning show here on KCAA, NBC News, CNBC News and
NBC Sports Radio station AM ten fifty f M one
oh six point five, home to the Asian Oprah, number
one talk in the Ie and streaming everywhere. iHeartRadio, Spotify,

(00:59):
Its Tune, in Audible, Amazon Music, Tiki, let, Rumbull, Pa, Chaser, Streaker,
Spreaker and more. Why so many places? Well, I want
to maximize my splatter zone for more hope and happiness
because there's so much bad news out there. All the headlines.
Now I used to say most of the headlines are negative.

(01:19):
They are now fully one hundred percent negative. And they
said it wouldn't last if I didn't talk about the headlines,
the show they've been last more than a year, well
thirteen plus years later, six hundred and ninety five consecutive
weeks later, I'm still here and I'm glad you're here
with me, because I love to balance out that bad
news with good news, partlines from headlines, and bring you

(01:44):
guest series and co hosts to help you either learn
something new, be encouraged, and learn something that you didn't
know before. And today is no exception. I'm really delighted
to have with someone who has been on the Tonight
Show and now she's coming on The Asian Opra Show

(02:05):
Podcast number one thousand, four hundred and sixty, but who's counting.
She was born and raised in San Antonio, Texas. Astani
is a genre blending singer, songwriting writer, and storyteller whose
music bridge is Latin jazz, Neo, soul, to Hanno and
South Texas can juto Junto. Her new album Let's See

(02:32):
to de Mi te accord Dadas, a heartfelt tribute to
her grandmother, Conjunto singer Rosita Rosita Lopez recently earned her
the twenty twenty five Hollywood Independent Music Award for Best
Latin Traditional Song with the single Mi suerte Ha Cambiado.

(02:56):
Astani has performed on stages from the Montreal Jazz Festival
to the Tonight Show, and co created the award winning
children's book and musical project introducing Side the Peacock The
Unique Beak. Please welcome to my studio, a study. So

(03:25):
glad to have you.

Speaker 4 (03:27):
I am so glad to be here, honored, thank you
for having me.

Speaker 3 (03:32):
Of course, and I'm what would you like on your
lower third? Singer songwriter?

Speaker 4 (03:40):
You know, sing singer songwriters.

Speaker 3 (03:47):
And we're gonna start the way that we usually do
on my show. And I didn't warn you because I
like it to be spontaneous, and that is we have
breakfast together, and breakfast consist of yes, taking a bite
of my gratitude sandwich. So what does that mean? The
top of the bun are things that we're grateful for

(04:09):
outside of ourselves, and the bottom of the but is
things that we're grateful for inside of ourselves, what we
like about ourselves, because we tend to be really hard
on ourselves, well meaning parents sometimes more mean than well,
you're not all that, don't too drone horn in Chinese
and Japanese as are saying the nail that stands up

(04:31):
is hammered down. And so as a result of that,
some of us don't really like ourselves or we don't
know what is good about ourselves. So that's why we
do this good life exercise to start every single show.
That way, you're not going on going around looking for
love and all the wrong places, or looking for someone

(04:52):
to approve of you or like you literally on social media.
So that's why we're not doing that. Thank you, somebody
just gave that's the finger, not that one, but this one.
So I'm going to start singer, and I am grateful

(05:12):
that I have the ability to well, that's the bottom
of the bud is multitask. But I'm grateful that I
got to go and do laps in the pool this morning,
and work out in the gym and slide into the
studio without getting in my car. That's a hashtag COVID

(05:33):
silver lining. We've learned that we don't have to necessarily
spend two hours on the road. And I'm grateful to
stream Yard for allowing me to broadcast live from my
loving room.

Speaker 4 (05:45):
What are you great on that living? Well, I'm grateful
for being here today. I was so happy to get
the call that I will be on your show. And
sometimes the spontaneous, unexpected moments are the best ones. So
I'm very grateful to be here, and I am grateful
that my daughter and I came back safely from our

(06:06):
first trip ever to Paris, celebrating her graduation from ut
and a milestone birthday for me. So it was a
first and it was lovely. I'm so excited and that
we were able to see all that. It was eight days.
We crammed a lot in and I'm excited to go back.

(06:26):
I don't know, I want to say sooner than later,
but at one point we will go back there and
be a little more leisurely. But yeah, it was a
great time and a great time here. Those are my
those are my win those are my great and there's
so many other things, but yeah, off the top of
my head, that's it.

Speaker 3 (06:42):
That's beautiful. How old is your daughter?

Speaker 4 (06:44):
She's twenty one, she'll be twenty two in a couple months.

Speaker 3 (06:47):
And this is UT as in University of Toronto.

Speaker 4 (06:51):
University of Texas in Austine.

Speaker 3 (06:53):
Because I was born in Canada, and yeah, so Toronto.
I just returned from there. So I was all excited
because I saw the Montreal Jazz Festival, so that I
just thought you were maybe were Canadian.

Speaker 4 (07:07):
But I can see tell yeah, I can see tell
you how that would happen. It's so funny because UT
in the States is for the most part automatically University
of Texas. But a lot of times I'll say, oh,
the University of Texas. Somebody oh ut, so you know,
I kind of interplanto.

Speaker 3 (07:21):
But yeah, yeah, yeah. And I got to take my
daughter high school graduation Paris, Venice, Venitzia Franze so and
that was our first travel too. So I'm so glad
that you got to experience that. It is something you
will remember for the rest of your life.

Speaker 4 (07:40):
I'm sure exactly. Yeah, it was amazing.

Speaker 3 (07:43):
So yeah, I was too young to have a twenty
one or twenty two. You must use oil and bolet
like I do.

Speaker 4 (07:51):
Oh yeah, oily olive oil. Yeah, I'll take I had
a friend of mine. I'll never forget this. I'm going
to tell you because it always suck with me and
all say it forever says you know, he told me
once said it's funny. We used to be young and beautiful,
but now we're just beautiful. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (08:10):
So I'll take it.

Speaker 4 (08:11):
Thank you so much. I call myself, Oh I lost
your I lost your sound.

Speaker 3 (08:22):
And a little technical difficulty there, but I sorry. I
may not pay you. If I'm not talking, you better
be talking.

Speaker 4 (08:31):
So I was just about to I know, I don't know,
you know, I sent it out there. I don't know
how many are watching or not. But I was about
to say, like, okay, you guys, so we're gonna continue
with the hand of the sandwich of gratitude.

Speaker 3 (08:45):
I'm grateful for refresh. I'm grateful that things always go
to plan eighty eight percent of the time. Twelve percent
of the time they don't. And it's okay that that's
going to bring us to the bottom of the button,
which is what do you like about yourself and feel free?
I see eyeballs in the studio. Welcome your tend to

(09:06):
take my advice, I'm not using it. Get balanced with doctor.
Rest of the morning show and a very special guest
this morning, a singer song right and an award winning
Astani and she is going to grace us with her
unique gift, talent and ability, which is music and so

(09:29):
but we're playing the breakfast game. Taking a bite of
my gratitude, sandwich, the bottom of the butt I want
you to do before you go to bed. So a
lot of us before we go to bed, we're thinking
about what we didn't get done, who done me wrong?
I'm you know, I'm never going to get ahead. Blah
blah blah blah blah, and no wonder you can't fall asleep.

(09:50):
So this is also a good life habit to get
into so that you know how to soothe yourself and
get a good, nice sleep. So when you're falling asleep
thinking about you know what I like about myself? I
like that I'm not going to beat myself up for
the rest of the day for the ten seconds of

(10:11):
dead time on radio, which is not good, but you know,
just happens and it's okay. And I you know, after
one four hundred and sixty shows, the fact that this
only has happened maybe five times is not a bad thing.
So I'm going to cut myself so slack. That's a
skill that I've learned as a recovering perfectionist. So I

(10:35):
love that. What do you like about yourself?

Speaker 4 (10:39):
I like that I'm resilient. I will not let any
obstacles or challenges deter me from the end goal that
I see. And I've learned that worrying does not do
anything for me, does not help the end goal become solved,
you know, it does help it get here any faster.

(11:02):
So I really try to let things go as I
used to hold on and over analyze and and like
you said, I was a and still am in regard.
But I want to be a healthy perfectionist and allow
myself that slack it allow my imperfections to be my
own personal perfection in myself. So uh, I'm proud of

(11:23):
my resilience.

Speaker 3 (11:24):
Yay. Then I love the Native Americans saying that worry
is a prayer for bad things to happen.

Speaker 4 (11:36):
That's I love that.

Speaker 3 (11:37):
Yeah, because yeah, so so if you I self identify
as a worry wart.

Speaker 4 (11:46):
Stop right right?

Speaker 3 (11:49):
Yeah, I wanted that go. Yeah, Well, I hope you
enjoyed having breakfast with us. I would encourage y'all to
come and have breakfast with me every weekday morning on
this show or not. You can do it on your
own with the person that you you know, you're insignificant,
I mean significant other or whoever you're driving with or

(12:10):
whatever on the way to work. It's a really good
life habit. One of my teachers, doctor Wayne Dyer, said
five gratitudes to start your day will guarantee you a
good day. I'm a little recovering overachiever. I say eight
because eight is a lucky number in Chinese. It's a
homophone for good fortune. So, however many you do, thank

(12:33):
you for joining us for breakfast this morning, and I
hope you do get again. And now for the topic
of the day that says everything is awesome, I want
it at Dave and Busters. The topic today is and

(12:56):
I gave you the formal introduction of a Stani prize. Well, uh,
this is the informal introduction I don't have. And you
look young, but maybe you still know what an answering
machine is? Do you remember I do?

Speaker 4 (13:12):
Of course, if you're.

Speaker 3 (13:14):
One of my younger audience, you're gonna have to go
look that up. Ask my assistant. We call what an
answering machine is.

Speaker 5 (13:21):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
They had that up on the Dodger game the other
day too. That was kind of funny, so the players
didn't know what a answer really Yeah, oh wow, I
don't have an answering machine. I have a questioning machine. Okay,
when you call me it says, who are you and

(13:43):
what do you want? So is Donnie, who are you
and what do you want?

Speaker 4 (13:52):
What do I want? I am?

Speaker 2 (13:54):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (13:55):
I like to say a lot of things, but they're
you know, they're titles. I mean, I am a children's
book author, singer, songwriter, a mom first and foremost, and
a teacher. You know, initially I was an academic teacher.
I'm been a teacher for many years. But I think
I'm a teacher now more of life and I want

(14:17):
to be taught the life lessons and following my purpose.
And I think that's really where I am. What I
am following now is following that purpose to serve others.
And I believe that when you serve others in whatever
capacity in mine happens to be in the creative space,
you really serve yourself exponentially just because of the value

(14:41):
that you give to others. It's that fullness of your
overflowing that you have filled yourself. Also, when I see
whether it's one person, it doesn't matter whether it's buying
my book or reading my book, or getting inspired when
I do my book readings, or singing at events or
writing a new song or this album. You know of

(15:02):
one person tells me like, I love it because you
don't know. You know, when you're putting yourself out there
in any capacity and in any venue, whether it is entrepreneurial, business, teaching, singing, acting,
the arts or not, the reception is that's a scary
place to be in. You don't know. You're taking a

(15:23):
big risk on yourself and investing in yourself. So who
am I and what am I here for? And you
know that that is it to be finding my purpose?
And I always tell my daughter, you know, if it's
she said, I don't know. You know, I graduated from
college and there's so many routes I can go. I said,
follow what you want and what you need will appear.

(15:46):
But you know, follow that longing in your in your
heart and your soul. I don't know. You know what
different people believe in God. I believe that God gives
us all this yearning for something bigger in our lives,
and when you follow that, you will find what you need.
Might not have been what you wanted, but it will
be that fulfilling purpose. And that's what I look for.

Speaker 3 (16:08):
Beautiful. So when you were a kid, could you imagine
what you were doing, what you're doing now, Like, was
that part of your Oh, I know this is what
I'm going to do?

Speaker 4 (16:22):
Yes? And no. I knew being very young that I
always wanted to perform and I wanted to be a
triple threat. I knew that even at six years old,
I was a dancer. My dad had put me in
my stepmother and put me in dance class. I was
very young. I was four or five years old, six
and I was in ballet, jazz and tap and I remember, oh,
I love this, I love being on the stage. But

(16:44):
the funny thing I remember too it not being like
to me in my mind, very embraced to have that
kind of career. And I clearly remember being asked I
was like, oh, what do you want to be? And
I always say a scientist. I thought it just sounded
so smart, you know, But I didn't know in what

(17:05):
capacity I would be doing it. It's funny I found
one of my journals. I have a show coming up
in September eleventh, and I had to look through an
old box full of charts for a big dam anyway,
and in looking in that box, I found journals. I
journal quite often, I mean I journal a lot. I

(17:25):
found my journal from twenty thirteen, I have every day.
And the funny thing, I wrote out a list. I
don't know, you know, I'm sure you do the artist's way,
the book, the artist's way, so I write. So I
was doing these steps in twenty thirteen, and one of
them was to like make a list of things that, like,
you want to accomplish, and it was crazy. Aside from two,

(17:47):
I've accomplished them all. But I was like, I want
to write a book. I want to write songs for others.
And one of my songs won an award for another artist.
You know that happened. This was that was in twenty seventeen. Anyway,
there's a lot of things that I had put in
there that I wanted to happen, and even self in reflection,
internalizing certain aspects of myself and changing them, and it happens.

(18:12):
And the two that haven't happened, Uh, it looks like
we're getting closer this year. So oh one was writing
was putting a documentary. I have that written down twenty three.
I want to make a documentary. And there's a documentary
being filmed now about this musical genre. So anyway, we're exciting,
exciting things that I didn't you know, I didn't see

(18:35):
that self fulfilling prophecy wrote it down, and twelve years later,
here we are.

Speaker 3 (18:46):
And that's encouraging all y'all to uh set intentions right, right,
that's basically what you did. The my my big brother
Michael Bernard back with my teacher says that we don't
all suffer from a d D necessarily, but idd intention

(19:11):
deficit disorder. And that's why I asked that questioning machine
question who are you? And what do you want? Like
the only times we really do that is you know,
when people ask you when you're a kid, what do
you want to be when you grow up? Or in college?

(19:32):
There's so many things. And it's my job in my
Happy eighty eight mission eighty eight million more happy people
in the next eight years, is to encourage people. You know,
you don't even need to find that one thing. Who
said there's only one thing that you can do chapters right,

(19:52):
And I'm so glad that the newest term. Someone said, oh,
you're a multi hyphen and I said, is that a
good thing or not a good thing? Right? And you
share this. I also have a children's book called Mommy
Winter Feelings. Yeah, and I have music that I haven't
done anything with and it was pashtag accidentally not accidental.

(20:16):
Beatrice put uh Laurlene in front of me with Wavemakers
Music with you know, to encourage me, you know, and
I asked, you know what now, brown Cow, because I
was to go on world tour that had been shut

(20:37):
down early by COVID of this book It's eight Ways
to Happiness from Wherever you are, and you know, did
very well national number one, blah blah blah, and two
days before I was supposed to fly for the rest
of the year, I went down to blood clots, like,

(21:00):
oh wow, no Shanghai, no Ireland, no Hawaii, no Africa.
So isn't it funny? Right, what are the chances that
one of my guests that is put in front of
me has an organization that you're part of that supports
your music called wave Makers Music. So I'm like, that's

(21:24):
exactly what you have. You're living your life with the
expectation that your desires will be fulfilled. And that's a
birth rate.

Speaker 4 (21:38):
For everybody, right exactly, That's exactly right. It's a birthright.

Speaker 3 (21:45):
Yeah, And that's saying I hate that, saying, uh, jack
of all trades, master of None horrible, saying.

Speaker 4 (21:53):
That it's so funny I have. I'm not at all
big on TikTok be, but I'm not. I need to
get my game up on that. But the point is
I have videos on that, and I feel the same way.
I've done a lot of you know TikTok about like
who made that up? Who made that up? I mean
you said that because it's like, you know, especially now,

(22:16):
you have to be if you're not, and you can
excel at so many things you know and not just
have like this one. You know, God's here. Thing that
you do and everything else kind of falls by the wayside.
Doesn't have to be that way, and it's just an outlook.

Speaker 3 (22:32):
Yeah, lots of different chapters that you can live in
your life. So I'm preaching to the choir. She's preaching
to my choir, which is great. And tell me about
your grandmother because obviously that it was a big influence.
And explain to me I read some of the terms

(22:54):
in the bio that I'm not familiar with. I thought
you were. I love it when I to promo up
and I can put the artist's music behind the promo.
I don't know if you saw that I teged you on.
I just I love that song. And so your fluent

(23:15):
Spanish you threw me when you first because I just
figured you know that that is your primary first language,
and and so I was expecting a little bit of
an accent because it was so fluent in your singing
and and and all of that. So, so take me
through because I'm a huge fan of Colorful Woman, and

(23:40):
I support diversity and I'm a cheerleader for it obviously,
So so tell me about that.

Speaker 4 (23:47):
Well, I will say, I say fluent, and I use
that very carefully. I'll say that because I would be
probably represented and you to be kind of like a
slang term. I don't know how people will perceive it now,
but it's okay because I say it proudly. I'm probably
more of about is Mexican American born in the States,

(24:11):
and your family is really fluent, and that is the
heritage background from you know, Mexico. But my and they
all speak fluent Spanish, but mine has a mixture of
English and Spanish. So if I'm conversing with somebody that
is fluent, they might look at me and say, uh, perfect,

(24:33):
you know, And I said, what I gick if we isn't.
But you know, I'm like, okay, no, you know that
they'll they'll hear, they'll hear my maybe hesitancy here and there.
So yeah, but the culture was always in my life,
and so when I revisited these songs and it was

(24:54):
completely by chance. I have been in LA for twenty
five years by twenty twenty two, when I left twenty
twenty yeah, twenty twenty one, twenty twenty two. Anyway, when
I left Los Angeles and during the pandemic, my mom was,
you know, by herself in San Antonio, and by herself

(25:16):
meaning just living at the house. You know, there's three
houses down on my aunts. We're all a big family
that are very close. And I decided to go back
to Texas during the pandemic. You know, I never had
gone more than like a couple days since I had
been in Los Angeles, just to visit holidays and whatnot.
And I think, if I remember, it was during that
time we were doing a big clean out of the
house and I had seen these forty five and I

(25:37):
was like, oh, wow, this is really cool, and I
had like come across them, but they were still kind
of like wow. I didn't know, I didn't know Grandma
had these these records. This is really cool. And then
it was just kind of okay, let's carry on with
the cleaning. When I moved back to San Antonio or
to Austin, and Austin now they started coming up again,

(25:59):
and I started thinking about my grandmother actually recording these songs,
and I thought, you know, that would be great if
she could re record. And I had an idea like
a winnib It's a social club documentary. I don't know
if you had seen that. It was about these Cuban
musicians who had come together by they were put back
together by some London documentarians who wanted to reignite the

(26:23):
music of Cuba with these musicians who weren't really given
the proper recognition. And I just was so inspiring because
these musicians had won a Grammy it like ninety two
Ubrakim Ferre, this one vocalist and Carnegie Hall his first
performance in his late eighties early nineties. So I was
fascinated by that, and I thought, you know what, I

(26:45):
can do this for my grandmother to kind of you know,
run this move the story along. She just didn't feel
confident in her voice because she's now ninety and when
I'd asked her, Hey, why don't we revisit this, she
was like, hmm, I'm not really sure that I can
seeing these the way I used to. And I looked
for her other musicians and most had passed, to be

(27:06):
honest with you at that time, and this was a
few years ago, So I said, can I re record them?
And she was, you know, she'd give me her blessing. Fortunately,
so at that point, that's when I became more intent
on searching for more songs. At first, it was going
to be an EP. And it's strange how like six
degrees of separation or how these like certain meetings lead

(27:30):
you to another point in the story that just.

Speaker 3 (27:34):
Kind of like accidental hashtag not accidental exactly.

Speaker 4 (27:39):
Not just coincidence. Yeah, and here's the funny thing. So
I had put this group. I contacted a group in
Los Angeles. I was not looking for a group here
in Texas at that time, which kind of ironic because
the Texas Gwan Huntel scene is the most vibrant and
the most authentic. Right at the time, I was I.

Speaker 3 (27:57):
Need, I need you to define.

Speaker 4 (28:02):
It is a type of traditional I want to say
text mex but Mexican American music from the border, and
it started with migrant workers when just after the all
day work, you know, going back to the house or
playing music on you know where they were, or to

(28:23):
the cantina, you know, when you go to the bar
after and just getting your your bajo sex bull. My
grandmother's father, my great grandfather made bajo sex bulls. Getting
the as a type of guitar, it's like a bass guitar.
I'm sorry with these calls. I don't know how to
take my phone. I don't know if you see what
I see here, but apologies for that little dan anyway,

(28:44):
So they would go and just play their guitar and sing,
singing songs like of the Lands, you know, more so,
and it became kind of like popular Gantina music. But
it was the music that resonated with South Texas in
the border of Texas. So and it's very traditional, I
want to say, very stripped, but acoustic, meaning like accordion

(29:07):
and accordion was brought in from the Germans and the
bolga from Mexico when Germans migrated, and that kind of
streamed into the South Texas border, primarily in Laredo. Texas
and then kind of migrated into San Antonio. And it's
not as prevalent here in Austin, to be honest, which
is a little I thought was a little odd considering
Austin's only an hour and a half from San Antonio. Anyway,

(29:30):
that's neither here nor there, sonto, that's the loose definition
of it.

Speaker 3 (29:37):
And but my I love learning new things. Didn't know
what it was, didn't know if I pronounced it right,
but I knew that it was some genre of music,
which that's you. One of your unique gifts, talents and
abilities is the melding of the different sounds. And I
love that. I think that I tell all the young musicians,

(29:59):
I know, it's your job to not be limited by
the different genres, you know. I think this is the
generation that's going to not only unite us in the
way that they look at diversity and how they are
very inclusive versus maybe our generation or the generation before,

(30:21):
but also creating new ways to express creatively in music
that is not limited by those lines. Right right, yeah, Yeah,
So your grandmother ends up recording with you. I heard
some of them were with her and you is she

(30:43):
still with us?

Speaker 4 (30:45):
She is? She just celebrated her ninetieth birthday in March,
so I'm very grateful and happy. And she went to
the album release show. And it's funny because I had
asked her. I was like, Grandma, you had to get
up and sing, you know you've been saying, and she's,
you know, she was a little which is she rightfully
so sees herself the way she did when she was singing,

(31:05):
you know, back in the sixties seventies, and I understand
that juxtaposition, you know, of being in that space. So
but here's here's the thing. When I was finished singing,
we were outside taking pictures and she started busting out
in song and her voice was literally just as strong,

(31:25):
and my, my, how impressed I was with her. Is
the fact that like to be able to sing on
key without a without the chord given is a gift
that's you know, that's relative perfect pitch or perfect pitch.
And her song she just started singing with the strength
that she had before. And I think, I'm hoping this

(31:46):
is my you know, assumption that maybe seeing me sing
her songs, which they're hers, I would love for her
to get up and sing them anytime, because if you
hear the old her versions.

Speaker 3 (31:59):
She has the.

Speaker 4 (32:00):
Grit and that soul and that authentic sound that is
applicable to that time. In conjunto music, there's there's women.
There's great conjunto women that I didn't know of and
they've already passed. And I'm doing my research with this documentary.
There's a woman in there's Biatriz Yamas, there's uh Lydia Mendoza,

(32:22):
Janet Cortez. I think that's anyway, I'm missing a couple
of them right now. There's a woman by Lens Coberto
who's playing with me tomorrow on Fox, so we're very
grateful for that. She's a the last of the fiddle
players in this kind of music. She's won many awards
and uh fiddle playing. And then there's Ibarra, who's Queen

(32:43):
of the accordion. But these women, I think they really
need to be uplifted more and more recognized on a
national level, which I believe they are, but not at
the level that I've seen other other Latin genres recogniz
as their female counterparts. I know, just in general, females
have had a harder time being recognized in the music industry.

(33:06):
So I'm not trying to like isolate this one genre here.
But I do question why Gounto music has been I
don't want to say segregated, that's not it, but like
just pushed to this one area and it doesn't seem
to get out. It is getting out there more now
with Bel Bluma's there's different groups that have kind of

(33:32):
pushed it up a little, but I would like it
to be more noticed and on a global platform. So
that's what I'm doing.

Speaker 3 (33:42):
And I just found out that my YouTube TV channel
is over four million impressions now, so I will help
with a little grand so so, but we're gonna have
to take a quick break for news, weather and traffic.
Word from our response, sir, and uh, we'll be right back.
Don't go away. We're tuned in to take my advice.

(34:04):
I'm not using a cabell So with Doctor Marissa, with
special guest musician extraordinary as Stannie, We'll be right back, Yo,
go away.

Speaker 6 (34:13):
Piece in piece that's two and two.

Speaker 1 (34:36):
Well, she has been dubbed the Asian Oprah and she
just wants all of us to be happy.

Speaker 7 (34:48):
Doctor Marissa aka the Asian Oprah says the most important
thing you can choose is choosing to be happy.

Speaker 3 (34:55):
You are tuned into my weekly talk radio TV show
called Take My Advice.

Speaker 8 (35:00):
I'm not using it. Get balanced with Doctor Marissa.

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That's the idea for it.

Speaker 3 (35:16):
Dr Marissa Pay's new book call Eight Ways to Be Happy.
Many of us say I am my own worst critic.

Speaker 8 (35:23):
Nobody's harder on me than I am.

Speaker 3 (35:27):
And my response to that is stop it. Why are
you doing that to yourself? You have to be your
biggest fan, because if you can't, at the end of
the day say I did a good job, who is
We don't have to constantly be angry at the things
that are wrong. Why don't we choose to be happy
about things that are right? We have the choice.

Speaker 9 (35:49):
That's our muscle, and life is so amazing if we
can see it.

Speaker 2 (36:13):
Take back your life with Doctor Maurica Pey.

Speaker 3 (36:18):
And welcome back your tune in to take my Advice,
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Morning show here on casey AA, the station that leaves
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(36:40):
and streaming everywhere iHeartRadio, Spotify and of course my YouTube
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hope and happiness and yeah, and great series, great topics,

(37:02):
great guests. And today we have the multi hyphen it.
You're a songwriter and uh, filmmaker and author. Those are
all y'all know. Those are my descriptors. So we have
a fellow multi hyphen it in the studio. Welcome back

(37:23):
to Astanie. So how did the award come up? So
you've got a nice award.

Speaker 4 (37:40):
Yes, I was. That was very unexpected. And you know,
the the song was not meant to be this upbeat song.
The way my grandmother had originally recorded it was in
the style of a ranchetra. It's a three it's kind
of more of a Walls type song. And and the

(38:08):
co producer, Max Pacha from West Text Maniacs, they are
a Grammy Award winning Gonhunto group. He had suggested, hey,
why don't we like pick this up because a lot
of the songs are slow songs which are called like boleros.
And I took his advice and you know, we we
have what we have now, and I thought, you know,
there again, like what I was saying before, there really

(38:30):
wasn't a space that I was hearing aside from being
in Texas. Now when we go out, you know, on tour,
and I know a lot of the conjunto groups that
they go to Europe, they talk about how much it's embraced.
But I didn't see it a lot outside of San Antonio, Corpus, Brownsville, McAllen,
so the valley in Texas. So me, uh, getting it

(38:52):
submitted into the Hollywood Independent Music Awards was kind of
on a whim. I thought, you know, this is a
it's not different for us, but I thought it might
be different for a Hollywood platform. And evidently it was,
and enough in a good way that I was surprised.
You know, we there was Latin traditional from Brazil, from

(39:14):
Puerto Rico, so there was a diverse selection. So we
uh fortunately resonated, as did everybody that was nominated. But
I was just grateful and like I said, did not
expect it. There's a funny story behind that. I don't
know if we have time for it, but a funny
story behind the wind. So but we won, So.

Speaker 3 (39:35):
That was great A two minute story.

Speaker 4 (39:38):
Oh it's less than that. I'll make it real quick, tell.

Speaker 3 (39:40):
Me the story. I love stories. I love learning.

Speaker 4 (39:45):
Okay, So we're I'm up on the mezzanine and they're
putting up the screen. It says, you know, best Latin Urban.
So it was like anything that was not muddingae. It
was more like hip hop kind of stuff. And I
knew that I wouldn't be in that category, so I
wasn't really focused on it. So they call out the

(40:06):
category of memes, and you know, it's a huge theater,
and they say, and the presenter says, and the winner
is is Sonny featuring Max Vaka. And so I'm standing
there and I'm in the front of the mezzanine or
I'm sitting there and I'm going, okol, they call my name.
So I run a million miles and I'm going, oh
my god, how did I get anyway? Make a long
story short, I get make my way and they're like,

(40:27):
what are you doing? Stop, And there's somebody else at
the podium already accepting an award. Anyway, it was some
sort of like misinformation, but they got the girl that won,
and so I'm sitting there going, oh my gosh, I
don't want to go back up there because all the
tables are like your co girl had to come back
like not really like you know, obously wasn't there all

(40:47):
I had to say, all's well, that ends well. I
eventually did go I'm saying, yeah, there was some sort
of I don't know what happened, but and I'm asking everybody.
You heard them say my name right you were And
I was like, yeah, I don't know. That's weird. So
anyway to get to the point when they said best
not traditional, even though I did see my name up there,
I was very low key when they called my name.
I was like, okay, this is real, right.

Speaker 10 (41:09):
Yeah, okay, and I look around that you know, got
somebody say it's you, it's you, go go go yo,
something that presents So anyway, it's a funny story because
I thought, what is happening.

Speaker 3 (41:21):
But that happened in several I think the major awards
where they announced the wrong one or yeah, somebody got
Steve Harvey did something stupid with one of those. See
like we're all we're not immune to it, right, And
you have.

Speaker 4 (41:40):
To write and you have to look for the silver lining,
because here was my silver lining in that I heard
my name called. I thought, well, my name must be
on a ballot somewhere, So I don't think they'd have
just the nominees, you know, because the nominee I was like,
so I think I won something, but where where is it?
But that was how I kept my mind the positive trajectories.

Speaker 3 (42:01):
Though, absolutely, And now this this project you are doing,
this show is sponsored in part by Wave Makers Women
in Music forty and I just wanted to give them
a little love because that is your support group.

Speaker 4 (42:17):
No, yes, and they have been instrumental and just amazing
and the help needed to really facilitate the awareness of
women in music over forty. You know, I've been literally
in the music industry for so now I'm going to
get away my age. Maybe I will, maybe I won't,

(42:38):
but for like thirty plus years, okay, so it's been
a long time. And you know, you do this because
you love it. I was and I still am a
vocal coach for many years, and I've produced a lot
of artists younger. And if you're doing this for a quick,
you know, look at fame or a quick like, oh

(42:59):
my gosh, this song is gonna go viral and then
everyone's gonna know me. You can you can just kiss
that goodbye, because I mean, yeah, it can happen, but
the sustainability is not at all in the cards. And
you have to do this because you love it. You know,
you are taking and and the the spectrum of me.

(43:22):
You know, one day, and this was back when I
was on tour with a really famous Latin artist. You know,
you'd be at Staple Center, which is now called the
I don't remember, I don't know what it's called now,
the Big the Big Arena in Los Angeles, so you
just called Staple Center anyway. You'd be there one minute,
the Crypto dot Com Center, I think, and then you're
at the you know, the restaurant that's asking for a

(43:44):
duo that night or whatever. You know that the what
am I trying to say? The contrast, I guess was
so vast, But you do it because you love it.
You know that's gonna happen forever. I keep thinking, what
am I gonna want to stop making music? This is
going to have to end because you know it's I
don't want to say it's bottle. But the ups and
downs of everything from just making a living and especially

(44:09):
the down once you become a certain age as a
woman in music, you know, it becomes a lot of
grit and a lot of grind and you keep thinking, okay,
so when someone says, well, I've paid my dues, and
it's like, I don't know, I've gotten to the point
where we're like, you will pay your dues forever. But
you do it because you love it, you know. And

(44:30):
Wavemakers has allowed us to be seen in a way
that here in Austin and beyond, in a way that
maybe we felt unseen before and not age a you know,
something that is I don't want to say taboo, but
that is even a subject. It shouldn't be anymore at all.

(44:53):
So I'm very grateful to Wavemakers for allowing us to
have this platform to be seen in heard, you know,
and you already were.

Speaker 3 (45:02):
So yeah, were you one of the five here? Yeah,
you're right there. That's awesome, that's awesome. Yeah. I got
to meet with Larlie when she was out here from Austin,
which was pretty cool. And uh again, like now I'm
going to be going through the whole process becoming one

(45:24):
of your sisters, wave Maker sisters, yeah, and I'm a
retired lounge lizard coming out of coming out of entertainment.
I did the stint here. I'm wondering if we were
like around the same time, way back when before I
went and got my my doctorate and my father came

(45:48):
down and said, uh, you know you're good, but you're
not that good because you don't die for music, So
why don't you get your PhD? And I don't blame
him like I I you know, I'm glad that I
did it, But now that I'm grounded from traveling, maybe

(46:09):
this is the Maybe this is a part of this.

Speaker 4 (46:12):
Is your next chapter. Like you said, yeah, it's never
I don't think it's ever too late.

Speaker 3 (46:17):
And yeah, so so as a vocal coach, I've actually
never had one. So this is why I'm asking you
these questions. So when you hear someone and they really
really want to sing, and it's really really in their heart,
and they really really think that they are destined, not

(46:41):
for overnight success, but that this is something they just
they have to do it or they they're gonna die,
And then you hear them and they're they are pitchy,
they can't really hear and no matter how much you
work with them, they're still pitchy with which is like
because of death for a singer, how do you work

(47:07):
with someone like that without dash your whole life's you know,
uh journey and their artist's way.

Speaker 4 (47:20):
You found it. I have mine too, I should have
gotten it. Yeah, well, you know I do come from
the thought of approach everything. And this is my analogy.
I always say, do you want to say pro peace
or do you want to say anti war? They mean
the same, but how are you gonna approach it? You know,

(47:40):
one has a softer connotation, and and that is just
so negative, right, So I will never focus on what
they can't do. I just there is something that is good,
something that is good because confidence killing confidence is the
number one mental mind blank fill in the blank that

(48:01):
will kill your performance. And there's I mean and what
I try to And so you know, coming from a
place where I didn't feel that I was always lifted up.
I had to be my own cheerleader in terms of
like how I what I put out there into the world,
how I sounded maybe you know for one, But again,
like you said, ultimately it is us we are our

(48:24):
hardest critic. But you know that can come from a
variety of experiences in your life. But all that to say,
so I really try to focus on what I can find,
and when I'm giving a voice lesson if that does occur,
because it has, I will find some like okay, let's

(48:44):
hear the tone or let's hear the delivery. And one
thing I will say is there are many singers out
there who don't have that much of a range, or
who don't really have this one of this beautiful vibrato,
or they can be pitchy from time to time, But

(49:06):
what is it that connects the audience to a vocalist
to a singer? And if you want to call it,
that is the way they emote their lyrics when you
go see them or hear them. And so if that
person has that emotional efficacy and they can deliver that
with passion and feel those words, I mean, how come

(49:30):
there's some singers there that you can that they just
go hello and you're like, oh my god, one word,
you know, and it doesn't even have to be this big,
grandiose sound or this big grant. So I really try
to ask my vocalist, you know, when you if you
want this dream of being a singer, and let's say
what you're telling me. They're oh, they're pitchy, their tone
is not the best. We start with just looking at

(49:53):
lyrics and just and really just even ear training, just
like the basics, and just how do you interpret these
lyric and let's let's talk about let's feel this out
and really and I give them little tiny techniques here
and they're like, Okay, if you do this, if you
you know, cr it in, if you give me a
little vocal fry, even a little bit of like didn't
you know? I mean, I'm just you know, those little

(50:14):
things that can even you don't have to necessarily have
this big range, because how many times have we heard
somebody who is technically great but they didn't move you.
It's like, wow, you hit the highest no ever, that's great,
but okay, like it sounds like more you're trying to
impress me. But I wasn't moved. And I was impressed
by your vocal agility, but I wasn't impressed by your
soul and what you felt and how you made me

(50:36):
feel those lyrics. So that is how I really go
about finding that inner work in somebody who maybe doesn't
have the technicality but I will always try to find
the best at what I can pull out of them.

Speaker 3 (50:53):
So I want to just give you a mooses drop
for that comment. And those of you, well, I told
you I was born in Canada, So instead of talking
about the elephant in the room, I talk about the
moose on the table. And when someone in my studio
says something brilliant, I have a moose drop instead of

(51:14):
a microphone drop. So I have to pick up because
that is that's brilliant, that is that's my life is
going towards something instead of moving away from it. But
I'd never said it like that. So pro piece same
as anti war, but pro piece doesn't have the angry

(51:37):
few component of the other side. So instead of focusing
on the pitchiness is to focus on things that are
working well or you can work with, which is confidence
or lyric interpretation or you know, being one with your music.

(51:58):
And that you just helped me so much, because the
two people who who were incredibly cruel to me about
my voice, their voices and their criticism far outweigh all

(52:25):
the beautiful positive, you know, compliments that I've gotten about
my voice and I've gotten about my original music. Blah,
blah blah, and that's my work is okay, what do
I do well when it comes to music and all
of that instead of hanging you know, having those criticisms

(52:50):
and their faces kind of blocking me. So thank you
for that. Oh I lost your sound time it to you.
So I'm really glad that you gave me that. We
are at the end of the time already. I knew

(53:11):
it was going to go fast, but uh, I don't
want to if you go out and come back in,
I don't know how fast you can do that. I
can stay on for another so that you can come back. Yeah,
just go back out real quick. And the technical difficulty
gremlins are still here, but that's okay. We're going to

(53:33):
focus on the fact that it didn't happen until the
very end of the show for you, okay, And you've
just been listening to a great singer, songwriter, musician who
is uh yeah, they're moves on the table exactly. Thank

(53:55):
you for being the captain of my Cashew Gallery Todayami Kidious,
and I don't think I've recognized your name before, but
welcome to the show. Thank you for manning the cashw
galleries that are the Peanut Gallery today, We've had a
great guest. She is a musician, singer, songwriter who has

(54:21):
won awards and we're still not getting her sound. But
that's okay. We got it for most of it, and
she can still do this with me to say goodbye.
How can we find you? Is what I wanted to
put up there of your music. I think if you
put in a Stannie, I'm going to practice right now

(54:44):
on Google. If let's see, I know that Beatrice gave
it to me a Stanie Frizzelle. Oh, you come up
right away in the Google search. So she's on Instagram.
Share this tab and let's see if we can do this,

(55:08):
we'll be able to see how to get a hold
of her at Astani for Zither's her Facebook and IMBD everything.
Let's see if you have a website. Don't see the website,
but I think this is probably a really good place
to find her. She's got a lot of stuff. I

(55:29):
know you're on TikTok as well, so I'm gonna follow
you now and yeah, so please do support her music.
You can see her coming up in her documentary as
Stannie for Zellie. Thank you so much. It's all about okay,

(55:50):
I see her saying something there it is. It's a
website and she has way lots of thing upcoming album
to deme to Accordadas drops Oh Friday that was in
July and streaming. What a great cover. By the way,
I'm glad that I remember to show that it's not

(56:13):
showing up. Okay, let's see there we go. There is
her album cover and you can find out everything from
her website. And that's it for take my advice, I'm

(56:36):
not using a gip. Balance with Doctor Marissa the Morning Show,
it's all about balance. Peace in peace, out world, peace
through inner piece. Now go and have the best day ever.
Tune into more for Doctors in the House with Doctor
Marissa and Doctor Tiffany Take and the topic is excuse yes,

(57:01):
we'll see you tomorrow.

Speaker 1 (57:10):
Ten fifty am. Don't forget that number. And for you
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Speaker 7 (01:00:06):
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