10-17-25 Fostering Friendships

Adult friendships are hard, circles shrink, people change as they age, and so many other things. Join Aggie and Rick as they discuss fostering friendships 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:04):
Hello friends, you have a moment so that we may
discuss our Lord and savior minnarchy. No, seriously, I'm just kidding.

Speaker 2 (00:13):
Hi.

Speaker 1 (00:13):
My name is Rick Robinson. I am the general manager
of Klrnradio dot com. We are probably the largest independent
podcast network that you've never heard of. We have a
little bit of everything, and by that what I mean
to tell you is we have news, pop cultures.

Speaker 2 (00:52):
They shut the lives down there in the sitting to
see the sea storms on rooms. Wow. The same man
them broke you. Hold your pay check in your old horse.
They'll sell your swell for sealer.

Speaker 3 (01:06):
Call your sacrifice relief whatever tribal truly bleat another line
of belief, freedom is a free has called them a
load and fire stone, and still the prizes tall.

Speaker 2 (01:22):
When the kneel and go on.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
Every promise tacks, they never breathe.

Speaker 2 (01:31):
The liver shange the horse of those still leave. Call
freedom freedom mis free.

Speaker 3 (01:52):
They made me some marble towers while they've been saw
you probably art.

Speaker 4 (01:57):
They w a fat man out of rules.

Speaker 3 (02:00):
Call me a smile for they'll bring y'all miss danger.
He'll micky'll fens green bod. Freedom, don't e from mission
it's just needs man who bleed freedom, Misson Free.

Speaker 1 (02:15):
That's calling him blood and fire.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
Song's little pride of sand.

Speaker 2 (02:20):
And song and materior deal and.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
They got a bad promise, say we Gray, They'll never
say Solo.

Speaker 4 (02:32):
Who still leave cause bread.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
Freedom, Mason Free, Freedom, Misson Free.

Speaker 2 (02:47):
It's written and read on history and speech. Wing to
the tyrant. Send the cords of the age.

Speaker 3 (02:56):
They can bury us in silence, but the trust else.
Fredo is on.

Speaker 5 (03:45):
K l r N Radio has advertising rates available. We
have rates to fit almost any budget. Contact us at
advertising at k l r N radio dot com.

Speaker 4 (04:04):
The following program contains course, language and adult things. Listener
discretion is advice. Welcome everyone to another episode of He Said,

(04:38):
She Said. I am one of your hosts for the
Evening Aggie, and with me is the very awesome rowdy Rick.
How are you doing tonight?

Speaker 1 (04:46):
She's the only holdst unless year that matters, folks. I
just keep the seat warm, just kidding.

Speaker 4 (04:51):
You push all the buttons, you do all the all
the behind the scene.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
I just I just talk.

Speaker 4 (04:56):
That's all I did is talk. I thought it was
a lot.

Speaker 1 (05:00):
My job is to make your job as easy as possible.
So now you got to do.

Speaker 4 (05:03):
You do a great job at that, that's I gotta say. So.

Speaker 1 (05:06):
Yeah, So anyway, we're here, we're live. So everybody's been asking.
That is actually a music video that Sean helped me
put together from sah or media. That is actually part
of an original composition that I put together using Suno.
So that is something that I wrote, I produced, and
he helped me put the video together for it, which
is why you'll notice the cool little guy and the

(05:26):
gee in the corner. Yeah, because I'm launching a full
fledged production studio starting in twenty twenty six.

Speaker 4 (05:31):
So because you don't do enough.

Speaker 1 (05:34):
Yeah, you know, while she's hearing me ripe all in
the green room. But how tired I am as I'm
launching another.

Speaker 4 (05:42):
Product, watching another thing, like, oh god.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
Well they all kind of tie together though, so and
I am slowly getting it figured out slowly eventually. It's
just it's been it's been getting back up to full
speed because ever since the house tried to kill me,
and ever since the power issues and everything else, for
a while, I was doing about thirty percent of what
I used to do. Then I got it up to
fifty for a while, and now I'm at about eighty

(06:08):
and I'm still but yeah, and I tried really hard
this week to get back to one undred. The only
thing I really haven't done this week is put out
on me twitchy pieces. And I've done just about everything else,
including getting some things redone and redesigned, and getting graphics
fixed for certain things, and getting King Country lined down
a little bit better, starting a newsletter for that one,
getting back into newsletters for the other shows that I do,

(06:31):
and so I was like, I'm almost there, and then
yesterday I was like, oh, I don't have as much
to do, but then I forgot about the wedding ceremony
that I had today and the yesterday and the other
ceremony that I have on Sunday. So I was like, oh,
I'll just take a break and eat my lunch. And
then I I was watching a show while I was
eating my lunch, and the next thing I know is

(06:52):
I was like, oh, I finished my lunch and there
was still like thirty minutes at the show level. I'm like,
I'll just watch this and then I'll get up and
go to work. Next thing I know, it's like five
o'clock and I have to be ceremony at six thirty ITOps, oops,
So then I did that. I rushed back home, we
did gin and Rick, and I was working till almost
one o'clock in the morning again pushing buttons for BEZ

(07:13):
and everything else, and then got up at seven this
morning started all over again, and I've been going pretty
much NonStop ever since. But yeah, and so yeah, I'm
back to about eighty percent of what I was doing before.
But I've noticed with every year I lose some percentage
points of what I feel like I used to be
able to do, and I'm like, I don't know how
to get it all done anymore. And it's not that

(07:33):
I don't want to do it. I love doing it.
I honestly wish that we had like forty eight hour
days so I could spend twenty four working and twenty
four sleeping. That would be just about perfect. But yeah,
that doesn't work because we don't.

Speaker 4 (07:46):
Have No, No, it doesn't. It doesn't really work. And
I think it's just a it's residual from growing older
and wanting to do wanting to have the same energy
we had twenty years ago to do the same things
that we were doing twenty years ago, to do them
right now. And I'm sorry, No, I just I.

Speaker 1 (08:09):
Keep beating myself up because I was like, if I
was twenty years younger, I could be doing this stuff NonStop.
But the technology wasn't here twenty years ago for me
to do most of what right now. So even if
even if I had that option, it would work. But yeah,
and I'm also a little depressed because one of my
co hosts keeps sneaking off an avalunch with other people
and still hasn't have lunch with me.

Speaker 4 (08:34):
I could not help that. He listen, Paul flew in.
He actually took it in and I said, if he
flew in, and so I told him I we meet
up with him, and it was we had a lot
of fun. His wife lovely, lovely lady.

Speaker 1 (08:51):
Yeah, You've had lunch with him like twice. Now.

Speaker 4 (08:54):
I think it's gonna be a yearly thing. He's gonna
be coming in every year now. I think he wants
to do that. I'm sorry, I'm charming. I can't help
that this isn't but I did. I actually asked me

(09:15):
about this, and we do want to go to Oklahoma.
I've never been to Oklahoma. I literally live an hour
and a half from Red River and I've never been
to Oklahoma. I kid you not. I actually drove to
the Oklahoma Texas border right north of Paris. I think

(09:37):
the town name was Hugo that I was going to go,
and unfortunately I couldn't go because suddenly there was a
storm opened up and I was like, yeah, I don't
want to go right now. I turned around. It was
like two miles from the Oklahoma border and I turned around,
So yeah, we really I want to go. There are

(09:58):
things that I want to see over on your side
of Oklahoma and I want to get I want to
do that because literally that is one state adjacent to
Mind that I haven't visited. I've gone to Louisiana, don't
want to go back. I've been to New Mexico it
was nice, but I've never done Alklahoma. So so I'm

(10:19):
planning on that hopefully next spring. I want to do that,
take a road trip, take like a week off, and
go over there over Yonder Listen, I got planned.

Speaker 1 (10:32):
Okay, I'll believe it when I see it. So yeah,
So I love him, Like on X is like everybody's
there for Aggie. I'm like, dude, that's why I'm there.
This didn't even used to be my show. Oh, I'm
just like, this wasn't even my show. So yeah, I'm

(10:54):
kind of there for Aggie too, So I get it.

Speaker 4 (11:01):
You're very sweet. Lewis is new to our chat and
he thought I was forty, and I'm like, I'm gonna
take that with me because that was nineteen years ago.

Speaker 1 (11:15):
Nice.

Speaker 4 (11:18):
So yeah, about twenty years ago. I had had more
energy at forty than I do now. But yeah, today
I was and and and you know, we met We
met up with our friends up in town about our
hour and fifteen minutes from here, and the hell we
just went shopping on all these little antique places and

(11:40):
bought some kitchen. Then we had lunch and in the
butt some bore kitchen. Then we you know, had to
go our separate ways because Paul and his wife had
plans for the evening with their friends and and they're
gonna have a lot of fun. They went, they're going
to a comedy, a comedy thing. A comedian is in
town and they want to go see them. But you know,

(12:03):
we got back on the road, and of course we're
coming back on the road and Texas highways. Man, I mean,
it's just full of semis. It took forever, but I
made it home in time for this.

Speaker 1 (12:20):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
Nice.

Speaker 1 (12:24):
So somehow our chat has turned into a nerd chat
because when I started talking about forty eight hours, almost
was like, yeah, we need the Majorn, you know, I
think actually I think they have like a twenty six
hour day. I don't know if you mistyped it or not.
And then somebody else was like, yeah that orbit but Riisa,
and I'm like, okay, so who's bringing the hor guns?
Asking for a friend?

Speaker 4 (12:46):
Okay, yeah too much. Although one of the items that
I purchased was very nerdy and I'll post a picture
of it probably tomorrow. I gotta I gotta clean the
clean it up a little bit. But yeah, total nerdal.
I was gonna say.

Speaker 1 (13:05):
I was going to say, don't you start acting like
you're too cool for us nerds, because we know, no, no,
I was the.

Speaker 4 (13:10):
Queen of the nerds in high school and I never
gave up my title. As a matter of fact, you know,
my high school group we had our ah I guess
you know you reunion this November this past November, and
I could not attend because I had made arrangements to

(13:30):
ten September and then they moved it and November is
just too busy a month for me. I just could
knew it. But one of the you know, when I
sent my regrets and everything on the group and everything,
it's like, but we were gonna like give you the
Nerd crown, and he he literally made a Nerd crown.
It was with rhinestones and it said Nerd on it

(13:52):
because everybody knew I was the Queen of the Nerds.
And I was like, you need to ship that to me,
like stat so, yes I do. I will be getting
my Queen of the Nerds crown next time I'm back home.
Yeah yeah, yeah, no, yeah, I will never. I will

(14:16):
never chee my my Nerd thumb. I mean that's like
a mantle that I wear with pride, rest assured. So anyway,
well today we decided to talk about something that I
thought would be kind of nice to touch on because

(14:38):
I had a lot of trouble with it when I
was growing up, and that is actually making friends and
cultivating a friendship and actually letting it grow. And that
was something that I had trouble with because I, you know,

(14:59):
coming from a different culture when I came over here,
it made things a little difficult with Americanized people. I
will say it that way, because there were people of
Mexican descent that lived in my neighborhood who had their
own culture thing going on, and they did not understand

(15:22):
my culture at all. So I med it kind of
hard for the first three or four years that I
was here to actually make any friends. As a matter
of fact, I think the first friends that I made
were in eighth grade and that or maybe late seventh grade.

(15:43):
I want to say about halfway through seventh grade to
eighth grade timeframe. That was the first time that I
actually started making friends. And I had been here since
fourth grade, so it took me a while to get
in that. And I see a lot of people who
take friendship for granted and they think that you know,

(16:06):
you make a friend and that the friend will be there,
but they don't understand that a friendship is actually a
relationship that you need to work on, just like a marriage.
So I kind of wanted to talk about how we
grow our friendships and funny acted anecdotes, I guess along

(16:26):
the way that we learned about making friends. Sure, it
has been it has it has been elucidating even at
my age, I'm still making friends. At my age, I've
been making new friends thanks to social media. Social media

(16:49):
has been a boon for making friendships, but it came
with pitfalls, a lot of them and people that was
something that jarred a lot of people. And you know,
that's where the term fake internet friend comes from. Fifs,
you know, and then I are l friends in real
life friends. You know that kind of thing, and so

(17:09):
we started differentiating, you know that kind of and sometimes
you know, if you play your cards right, your fake
internet friends will become your in real life friends. I
have a few of those that I met through through
Twitter and through other social media sides you had, yes, okay, bitter,

(17:30):
but you know, if you follow Queen Velvet on on
x she is a personal you know, we have met
in real life. She comes and visits me. She's actually
coming to visit me in February, Alaska. Courtney, that is
another one that's a real life friend, and I have
I have to go visit her her soon. She doesn't

(17:53):
live too far from me right now. And you know,
Tense Spike, that's another one. She's in real life. I
have made you know a lot of in real life
friends because I met them through social media. But you know,
one of the things that a lot of people don't
understand is that sometimes when you're making a friend, some
friends don't want to be made, and so you have

(18:16):
different classes of friendships. And you know, not all friends
are the same, and not all friendships are as strong
as others. And it can be weird to navigate because
for some people, you may consider someone to be a
you know, just a friend, somebody that you say hi

(18:39):
to every so often, but that person may see you
as a very close friend, even though it's only through
social media. And sometimes a lot of people are surprised
to learn that they have fostered a friendship that they
didn't even think they were doing. And I've been know,

(19:00):
I've been on on on the other end where I
thought the friendship was really solid, but it wasn't. So,
you know, I tend to gauge my friendships in a
really strange way. I tend to gauge it how people

(19:23):
would react to me being in jail. I know it's weird,
but it works for me because you have you know,
and and I keep and there. I believe that we
have friendship circles like bubbles that that that we interact
with all the time. And you know, so you have

(19:45):
and sometimes they're you know, for me, they're cocentric. So
you have you know, an outer outer circle, you know,
and those are your you know, your your acquaintances and
and every you know, that kind of thing and and
it's prett very much just surface level stuff that you hey,
how's it going. You know, you know, they post a

(20:07):
picture on on on Facebook or Instagram and you hit
the light button and and you you compliment them and
you're you're done, you know, like that that that kind
of thing, and you just go on and whatever. And
you might, you might in real life, if you have
a friend like this, you might go and meet up

(20:29):
for you know, to go to a club to see,
I don't know, some band or whatever. You know, this
is the kind of person that will you know, will
feel sorry for you if you're in jail, but you know,
they'll let other people know you're in jail and you

(20:50):
can't return any messages at this time. You know. That
that kind of thing, That kind of a friend. So
they're not very close. They do exist in your sphere
and you do enjoy interactions with them, but you don't
go out of your way for them. You just know
that they're there and they're nice and and you know,
but if you were to fall off the face of
the earth, it wouldn't impact them, And if they were

(21:13):
to fall off the face of the word, it wouldn't
impact you either. It's just some a friendly interaction that
you have with someone on the basis of just sharing,
you know, a couple of things in common, or sharing
you humanity, or you know, just being nice to each other,
that kind of thing. And so that's that's my outer circle,
which it's really big because I tend to I tend

(21:39):
to put everybody that I have interacted in just in
a small way, that's where they're at. I once you
interact with me in just a small way, I immediately
put you in that circle because I want to see
if that friendship develops.

Speaker 5 (21:59):
You know.

Speaker 4 (22:00):
Yeah, So that's my outer circle. How do You's not weird?

Speaker 1 (22:09):
My circles have gotten so small. I don't even really
have much of an outer circle anymore, because as I've
gotten older, I've figured out that a lot of people
that I considered kind of more of my you know,
work friends or peripheral friends, now that I don't really
now that I work from home all the time and
I'm off to my own stuff, I don't really have.
I mean, I still have a couple of folks that
I used to work with that I talk to, But

(22:30):
most of the folks that I used to think of
as like really solid work friends don't. We don't even
talk anymore. As a matter of fact, some of them
have completely disowned me because they figured out my political affiliations.
So I mean, as far as real life friends, I mean,
I think I can count them on one hand and
have a couple of fingers left right now. As far
as people that I interact with that I actually see

(22:51):
on a regular basis now, as far as on Twitter,
I mean, most of the people that are affiliated with
KLR and radio, I don't even really consider you guys
friends anymore. You become family over the years. So that's
another reason why my my circles are a little different,
because you know, some of you guys have been involved
in this stuff for almost as long as I've been
involved with it, and you've helped it. You've you've kept

(23:11):
it going even when I was, you know, deciding if
I wanted to live or not. For God's sake. So
you know that that that that changed a lot of
you guys's positioning in my world, even though I still
haven't been able to have lunch with it most of
your anything.

Speaker 4 (23:24):
Okay, I'm working on it.

Speaker 1 (23:29):
You know, I'm just easing. But you also you knew
this was gonna happen, though I know, I know, I know,
but yeah, I mean, trust me, we we we could
have met when Seapac was in Florida, but I couldn't
get there. So it's just as much my fault as
it is yours. So but no, it's but no, it's
just you know, I I don't keep people in friend

(23:49):
circles for very long. If you start to matter to me,
I start to think of people more like family than friends,
because that's just how I am. I think that's one
of the reasons why people look at me and from
the outside they're like, why do you do so much
for so many different people when they don't do nearly
as much for you? And I'm like, because that's how
I think of them, And it doesn't really matter what
their motivations are. It only really matters what mine is.

(24:10):
So but yeah, so, I mean, and the weird thing
is like talking about cultivating cultivating friendships. I have somebody
who I've been friends with since kindergarten and we have
grown very far apart over the years, but we will
occasionally hook back up on social media and start talking again,
and it's like we've never missed a beat.

Speaker 4 (24:28):
So there are some that, Yeah, there are some friendships
that are like that, which is which is another aspect
of how you know, those circles work for me, like
you know, like outer circle is really wide, and then
you have a middle. For me, it's a middle circle.
And those are you're kind of like the casual friends,
you know, the you hang out, the people from work,

(24:51):
the gaming buddies, the uh you have you have common interests,
like the same hobbies or the same you play the
same games or you know whatever. But it's a very
low pressure socialization. You know, you're together and it's great

(25:11):
and it's fun, and but once you go your separate ways,
it's like okay, the tiller, you know. And that kind
of low pressure friendship is necessary because some people have
a very low social battery. They cannot be constantly, you know,

(25:34):
putting forth the effort to you know, be around people,
be around doing sharing all sorts of stuff all the time.
I mean, they really need to step back and just
be alone, be just completely shut down before they have
a breakdown. So a casual friendship like that works for

(25:55):
a lot of people. Now, like you were saying, some
of us we could we consider each other family and everything.
And that's for me. That's the innermost circle is the
smallest circle for me, and those are the closest friends,
those are the top ones. Whereas the casual friends, you know,

(26:18):
they'll post your bail in jail, okay, they will post
your bail these However, they will actually be sitting next
to you.

Speaker 2 (26:28):
You know that.

Speaker 4 (26:29):
You know, it's like your best friend will sit next
to you in jail, that kind of thing. But they'll
tell you where you went wrong. They will not shy
away from telling you how wrong you were and how
much you messed up. And they will be mean and
they will be cutting, and they will do it because
they love you, and that friendship is something that is

(26:51):
very rare. I I'm almost sixty and I can count
on one hand how many people would do that for me.
I know that I would do it for a lot
of people. I have no problem telling people they're wrong,
but but for but they're very I have very very

(27:14):
few people that will actually tell me this is where
you messed up, that you know, you need to do this,
you need to fix this, you need to blah blah blah.
There are very few people that will actually be confident
enough to tell a friend that, And those are the
people that you want to keep close and you want
to develop a relationship with these people. And by that

(27:36):
I mean you can't just.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
Let it.

Speaker 4 (27:42):
Be there, you know, whenever you need it. You need
to be there for them all the time. You need
to be able to dump anything for them all the time.
In other words, you need to give to them more
than you expect them to give to you. That's how
you cultivate that friendship. It's like I said, it's like
a marriage. You give more than what you expect to
take in. And and you're right. There are some friendships,

(28:06):
like you know, your friend from kindergarten, where you know,
you go your separate ways and then you reconnect after
a few years and it's like, you know, it's it's
like being back again. And for me, I have I've
noticed that with friends like those, most of the time
we reconnect and it's all about the stuff that we

(28:27):
did beforehand. It's never about the stuff that has happened afterwards.
And that's still fine. I mean, I enjoy it, and
I know they do too, except for one person who
shall be named nameless, because he broke my cousin's heart
and I have never forgiven him for that. But anyway,
that's just me. I bear grudges you, but I know

(28:53):
I'm really bad about that. I do bear grudges, and
I need to work on that. But you know, for me,
having a friend that can be completely honest with me
and tell me where I went wrong or how horrible
I was to somebody, or you know, basically yelling at

(29:14):
me to correct my life, that is a friendship that
will go with me to the grave. And I mean
it's just for me. It's the most precious friendship at all,
because when you have someone that is willing to tell
you to your face all of the horrible things that

(29:37):
you are because they want you to fix it and
to change and to be a better person, that's something precious.
You get that sometimes from family, but even family will
fail at telling you that. Sometimes friends of that caliber.
You keep those friends because they will love you with

(29:58):
all your wards, with all of your faults, and you
will return that love for the same reason. Once you
find a friend that can do that for you, you
know you can do that to them, and that that
forges something inside of you that makes that friendship so
strong and almost unbreakable. Almost. I will say that almost

(30:21):
because they're you know, I can't. I can't speak for everybody, So.

Speaker 1 (30:26):
I will be surprised that your friendship skill didn't involve
your least likely to stab list. I kind of figured
that would be where your scale would start for your
friendship circles.

Speaker 4 (30:37):
That actual circle is not cocentric, It floats outside of
the other circles.

Speaker 5 (30:46):
Exist.

Speaker 1 (30:46):
Because I was like, I'm surprised, who am I least
likely to stab? Is who I start at least trying
to cultivate friendships with. But now I mean for me
one of the things. And I think it's kind of
a holdover because I mean, like I said, I have
I had the same set of friends growing up because
my parents bought the house that I was in until
we moved away when I was three, So I had

(31:07):
pretty much the same set of friends all the way
through elementary school until my parents got divorced, and I
kind of took a giant dose of fuck at all
and barely did anything my first fourth grade year. So
even though technically I passed with a sixty nine, my
mom was like, that's not good enough, so you get
to do it over and then so I did fourth
grade again, made new friends, did fifth grade again. Then

(31:29):
we started moving around every year, so it became next
to impossible for me to make friends because I was
in I went from being in the same place and
having roots to being in a different school every year
from the time I was in sixth grade until I
was until I was in tenth grade, and it was
hard on me. And when we moved back home, I
reconnected with some of the friends that I had before,

(31:50):
but we didn't other than letters here and there, we
didn't really keep up that much, so it was hard
to refoster those friendships again. And I mean, I still
have a couple of folks that I went to high
school with that I talked to on a regular basis,
But like I said, most of the people that I
spend most of my time talking to or people that
I do podcast with because I do so damn many
of them. Probably, yeah, we have a few, so my

(32:17):
circle has gotten even smaller. And one of the downsides
for me is and I never used to be this
way after doing you know, call center work and so
many things for so many years where I was on
a clock all the time and had to basically keep
up with every second of every single day. I hate
being on a phone, and my dad knows it too,
because when my dad calls, he'll start he'll start going, Okay,

(32:40):
I know you're gonna want to get off here in
a minute, but there's one other thing that I need
to talk to you about after because after it gets
to about ten minutes, if I'm on a phone with somebody,
I get nervous as hell. I don't know why this
doesn't do that. I don't know why, but if I'm
on a phone, then it's there's like a little clock
that's constantly running in the back of my head. It's like, Okay,
you've been on this You've been on this call way
too long. And dude, I have been retired from that

(33:02):
line of work for two years and I still can't
shake that. And it drives me insane because I remember
when I used to make fun of people with idio secrecies,
secrecies like these, and now I'm starting to get them.
I don't like it.

Speaker 2 (33:18):
Now, I.

Speaker 4 (33:21):
Totally get that. I'm not a fan of. For me,
it's emails. I don't know what it is about emails,
but I don't like emails. I get nervous reading emails.
I get nervous answering emails. But I'll sit there and
I will write a letter. Just fine. I don't know.
I have no idea why.

Speaker 1 (33:42):
For you, it's probably more of you like the feeling
of the pencil in your hand. But I do have
a question though, because this is something that's made me
wonder now, because that's the reason why you and I
predominantly communicate via text when we're doing show preps. So
if I'm making you nervous, let me know anden for you,
I will make phone calls.

Speaker 4 (34:01):
Oh no, no, no. Text is fine, you know, DM
is fine. All fours of communication are fine. But if
somebody writes me an email, I'm like, this is I
read this? I just read it. I don't know why
I have over sixty three thousand unread emails in one account.
I just like, you know, I just don't like it.

(34:25):
But oh my god, somebody writes me a card, and
I am all, I mean, I opened that card. I
will read that card. I will treasure that card. I
have saved all my cards.

Speaker 1 (34:35):
So yeah. I send somebody a screen capture of something
once and somehow at the bottom it listed the number
of voicemails I had on my phone and the number
of unread emails I had on my phone. And they
started having a cow They're like how.

Speaker 4 (34:51):
I'm like, I know, I'm really bad, but you know
it's my oh wait account. It's not my you know,
my my actual email account, the one that I do
read where my family gets in touch with me, you know,
and everything that's separate. This is the junk mail account.

(35:15):
And I'm like, yeah, whatever, I I know, I don't
care if Tom's is having a sale. No, I don't
care if Home Goods is having a sale. You know
that kind of thing. So but yeah, I for me,
it's it's not phone calls. I can get on the
phone and I can talk to anybody for whatever reason,
for any amount of time. I have no problem with that.

(35:36):
I cannot sit down to write an email. I'm sorry,
ain't nobody got time for that? But but no, the
people least likely to be stabbed. If I stab you,
it's because you have endeared yourself to me in some
form or another, So stabbing is not necessarily a bad thing.

(36:00):
Also means that my ire has been aroused. So enemies, yeah,
might get stabbed, you know, that kind of thing. If
I will have I would need to have feelings in
some way for the person that I'm stabbing. The people
That's why the people least likely to stab are people

(36:20):
that I really don't care about, which is why they're
outside of my circles. But you know that that's because that,
you know, because I care. But no, yeah, you know,
somebody asked me that.

Speaker 1 (36:37):
One I don't. I don't know if this makes me
feel less comfortable or more.

Speaker 4 (36:43):
Somebody somebody asked me that once. What they were joking,
and they were being stereotypical joke joke jokesters, you know,
but they they asked me, it's like, what's it like
to you know, like get out of bed and just
want to stay somebody? You know, because I'm Puerto Rican
right and our weapon of choice when I was growing

(37:07):
up was a knife. Puerto Rico, believe it or not,
does have a lot of gun control laws and everything,
and they can get away with that because they're not
a state, they're a territory.

Speaker 1 (37:21):
So go figure for a.

Speaker 4 (37:24):
Time, if you own a gun, you had to be
a member of a marksman club, So you actually have
to become a member of a club in order to
own a pistol or a revolver or you know whatever.
But anybody could have a knife. I mean, my uncle
would give knives to all of my cousins. And we

(37:48):
weren't even in kindergarten yet. We were learning to use
machetes before we went to school. I mean, knives are
our thing. So they were joking with me about you know,
how many how many people have I stabbed? You know
that that kind of thing. And and this wasn't on

(38:08):
social media. This was actual people.

Speaker 5 (38:10):
You know.

Speaker 4 (38:10):
We were we were joking and laughing around and and
I said, you know, it's funny I should I should
say that because I did step a friend of mine
and everybody fell silent. They were like what I was, like, well,
I was in I said, in my defense, it was

(38:31):
only fourth grade. And somebody said what I said? And
he was being a he was being an asked whoa
it was?

Speaker 5 (38:38):
A he?

Speaker 4 (38:40):
It just kept escalating. The story goes, Okay, so this
is what happened, and this is the guy that I
still have not forgiven because he broke my cousin's heart.
But growing up, he was my best friend and he
he and I were like we had the same brain
type of thing going on. But I was whenever somebody

(39:03):
has the little devil and the little angel on their shoulders,
I was the angel. He was the devil. We were
two perfect sides, too perfect HAPs right. Well, one day
he decided that he was going to bring his new
hunting knife to school. Yeah, we could do that, Okay,

(39:27):
there was no problem doing that. Every almost everybody that
went to school had a knife. So he brought it
to school and it was really nice. It had a
horn handle, it was you know, blah blah blah. And
then he said, you'll never have anything this nice because
you're a girl. I looked at him straight in the

(39:48):
face and I said, what did you say to me?
And he's, oh my god. I was like, excuse me,
and he repeated it. I gave him an out. Okay,
I gave him an out, but he repeated it, and
I said, let me see that, and like an idiot.

(40:10):
He hands the knife over and I looked at him
and I pointed it out him and I said, I
dare you to say it again? And he said it again.
So I said, okay, fine, and I just held the
knife and he put his hand out to get the

(40:30):
knife and I said no, and he said, it's my knife.
I got it from my birthday or whatever was that
he got it for. And I said no, and I
said you're going to have to get it from me.
And that's I think that's when it started to dawn
on him that he had like really messed up because

(40:50):
he had never won against me whenever we wrestled.

Speaker 1 (40:54):
Never.

Speaker 4 (40:55):
It's not that I was stronger, it said, I was quicker.
So he was like, oh shit, but he decided to
do it. And I said, okay, fine. The knife was
still open and I poked him in the the back
of the thigh. He was so embarrassed that he refused

(41:17):
to go to the teacher to say anything. He just
took off his undershirt and he wrapped around and and
and that was that. We still we were still joking
about that when he was dating my cousin and I said,
don't make me stab you again. And and he was like, no, no, no,
I've learned my lesson. And my cousin was like, wait what,

(41:40):
So we had to tell her that. But then he
broke my cousin's heart by cheating on her with another
friend that we went to school with, and I was like,
you know what, You're dead to me.

Speaker 1 (41:53):
So so that was that.

Speaker 4 (41:54):
But yes, I actually actually did stab my best friend
at the time.

Speaker 1 (41:59):
Well she didn't stab him again, I guess, huh I did.
At least you didn't actually stab him again. I guess.
I guess you just said he no.

Speaker 4 (42:07):
No, I was nice. I was, you know, and to
be fair, I gave him an out twice, okay, and
still he wouldn't take it. And it wasn't until it
was too late that he realized his mistake and he
paid the price. You know, this wasn't even our only altercation.

(42:28):
I mean, he actually said something to the effect that
I looked like a scarecrow wearing a skirt and I
decked him in the face. I still have the scars
on my hands, and I am shocked that I did
not contract an infection because I cut them on his teeth.

(42:54):
I cut my skin on his teeth. But I was good.
I went to the bathroom and I washed it with
a lot of soap and it's stun But yeah, he
he didn't know when to quit. Only kind of thing
is I am a nice person. I really am. I
my parents seriously. My sister's off Camma door, Matt.

Speaker 1 (43:18):
But when she's not stabby, when I'm.

Speaker 4 (43:21):
Not stabby, And I'm sorry he pushed me too far.
So he learned a lesson, I'm.

Speaker 1 (43:28):
Hoping, apparently, not if he was risking being stabbed again
by cheating on your cousin, he didn't really.

Speaker 4 (43:37):
Well, you know, hey, Lewis brings up a really good point.
You know the Latina sharp thing narrative, Well, it exists
for reason, honey. It stereotypes exists for a reason. I
live up to mine. I didn't.

Speaker 1 (43:53):
I didn't want to say this until you were finished
with your story. But as soon as you started, as
soon as you as soon as you said, what did
you just say to me? The first thing I heard
in my head was Brad doing though. Oh no, you didn't,
you know?

Speaker 4 (44:13):
I I you know, Yeah, stairs knives do exist for
a reason. I am living proof of it, apparently, but yeah,
oh no, he didn't. I was not a happy capra.
Admittedly at the time, I was what, uh it was
fourth grade, so and.

Speaker 1 (44:32):
It was the year well probably about ten, maybe, no,
it's nine.

Speaker 4 (44:37):
I was nine when it happened because my birthday had
just happened, and so and his birthday was is right
after mine. That's why he got the knife. It was
his birthday. So so yeah, I was nine and and
he turned nine and he was showing off his knife,
and I was I was so mad because I didn't
get a knife. I didn't get a knife that year

(44:58):
my dad. My dad insisted on getting me a microscope,
which you know, awesome, but still I went a knife too.
It was like I was asking my uncle, why don't
I get a knife? Oh, you're a girl. What did
you just say to me? Buncle?

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Oh my gosh, you get my machety? Tell I will
get it now.

Speaker 4 (45:25):
This was the dandy uncle. He had manicures done all
the time. He wore palmade on his in his hair,
he wore you know those white uh white patten leather
shoes that you know. Yeah, that was my uncle.

Speaker 1 (45:42):
So nice, I know, I know.

Speaker 4 (45:48):
So he was so funny. He was the one that
had twenty four children, yeah, that's a lot of kids.
He he had a lot of baby mamas.

Speaker 1 (45:59):
He did, I would hope. So, I mean, I don't
mean that in a bad way or nothing, but if
you had twenty four children with the same woman, holy,
that's all that's yeah.

Speaker 4 (46:11):
No, I know, no, no, So his last wife was
I think twenty five years younger than he was. Very nice,
very nice lady. She's younger than I am. Actually thinking
about it. Wait a minute, she's younger than I am.

Speaker 1 (46:28):
No, wonder you were all telling one of your friends
that age is just a number.

Speaker 4 (46:33):
Yeah, that's that's true. I mean, my my family is
living proof of that. But but anyway, Yeah, so I
don't know if we were talking about friendships, but I
did mention that there was a circle that I that
I that floats outside of my circles. And yes, those
people I would I would never stat because I don't.

(46:54):
I don't feel there's enough there there to incite me
to stab for any reason. But that is kind of
like the lifelong friends that you made, Like like you said,
for your friend from kindergarten, that's where I would put

(47:15):
some of my friends you know that I've met, I
have known for many many many years, but they're not
very close. You know, you have that mutual history, but
and so that makes.

Speaker 2 (47:29):
A bond.

Speaker 4 (47:31):
That you keep. But you know, the I guess they're
kind of like a reflection of what you used to be,
you know, growing up, and and you it reminds you
of what was there. Sometimes they share so much with
you that it's like you're thinking with the same neurons

(47:54):
and axiom axons, you know that kind of thing. They
they will I don't think that they're very judgmental, so
they just take whatever happens, you know, with you, Like
you tell them, hey, you know this, yeah I got
you know, I ended up doing a stint in jail
for you know, DUI or whatever. And they're like, yeah,

(48:16):
you know, that's that's rough, buddy. You know that kind
of thing. But they don't think anything else about it,
you know, that kind of thing. And they would literally
be the person that will treat you to lunch while
you tell them about your stint in jail. That's that's
how I gauge that kind of friendship. And I'm you know,
there are some people that move through those circles and

(48:37):
most of the time they'll go from the outer circle
to the middle circle, and some people in the middle
circle actually move into the tight circle, the tiny circle.
I've only had one person in my life that has
gone through all of the circles, including the outside one
in reverse, and that was It's really weird because that

(49:03):
was a very deep loss for me and I didn't
expect it to be. But when you look at a
friendship as being something like a marriage, then it makes sense.
And this was someone that I thought was a very
close friend. We shared a lot together, a lot of pain,

(49:26):
we shared a lot of joy. We were very very close,
and it was almost one day to the next where
this person just left and for them it was like
I'm going in a different direction. And that was that,
And it's jowring when it happens. I'm glad to say

(49:50):
that it only happened once to me, and I'm almost sixty,
so that's a great track record.

Speaker 2 (49:56):
You know.

Speaker 4 (49:57):
My sister has had the you know, unfortunately, she's had
a few friendships that have done that where she thought
that they were really tired and suddenly they're not. They
just disappear. And of late, we have noticed that politics
has been doing that to a lot of people. What

(50:19):
happened with Charlie Kirk woke up a lot of people
to what they didn't want in friendships, and there was
a lot of cleaning up of that that I noticed,
and it happened to me too. I actually had to
take steps to divest myself of toxic relationships that I

(50:44):
felt were evil, that they had absorbed evil, you know.
And so that has been something that I kind of
noticed before Charlie. But when that happened, it was stark.
There was a lot more of it. It was like

(51:05):
it bloomed like yeast, and it was ugly. So I
can see where some people have decided to walk away
from certain relationships and certain friendships or whatever because of that.
But when it happens with no explanation and no cause,

(51:29):
but there's a fact, it's kind of weird when it happens.
It kind of it gives you a feeling of being
unbalanced because you don't know, you don't know why the
person left, and you always want that closure. And I'm
you know, with that particular friendship, I'm never going to
have it. I'm never going to know I I won't

(51:54):
so and the weird thing is we I still see
this person in my media. I see them all the time,
and it's like the friendship never existed, and I have
no I have no explanation for it, and all I

(52:16):
can do is wish them well and hope that they're happy,
and pray that at some point they are, you know,
they are complete in whatever it is that they were seeking,
because that's all you can do, That's all you can
hope for. When if you truly truly love that friendship

(52:40):
and truly love that friend, that's all you can help
for them, regardless of how the friendship you know unwinds
or you know develops or whatever. And this is something
I tell everybody. Tell your friends you love them always.
It doesn't matter if it's a male friend or a
female friend. It doesn't matter if it's a casual friend,
or if it's a hey, she happens to be in jail,

(53:02):
she's not going to return your messages kind of friend,
or if it's the one that's sitting in jail with you,
you tell them that you love them. Love is something that,
believe it or not, is easy to give. Once you
realize that it's unempy, it always comes out. It's infinite.
So always tell your friends your love. I love you guys.

Speaker 1 (53:27):
You know you man. No, I mean, so I have
a question, though, I guess because I didn't stab them. No,
but no, that wasn't the question. I mean, now I
have other questions, but that wasn't the question. I was
going to ask you, who is it that you suppose? No, No,

(53:49):
I mean so, as far as cultivating friendships, when you
decide to move somebody from one circle to the other,
what are some of the things. What's some of the
internal thought processes you go through to German whether somebody
deserves to be moved from one circle to the other.

Speaker 4 (54:05):
It's really interesting. Usually with a casual friendship, and those
are the ones that I can speak about. I'll use
my friend Faith as an example. She and I were
casual friends due to where she was working at the time.

(54:27):
And one day she just invited me to lunch, and
we went to lunch and we started talking and everything,
and when I came home, she sent me a text
saying I had so much fun. We need to do
this again. It wasn't about we need to do this

(54:48):
again sometime. No, she was adamant, we need to do
this again. I need somebody to talk to that understands
where I'm coming from. She came from Pennsylvania, came to
live in Texas. She was completely lost, Okay, So so
I said, yeah, sure, whenever, just you know, that's fine.

(55:08):
Three days later, I want to go to lunch, okay,
And I went to lunch. And that helped to develop
my friendship with her. She found herself wanting to not
exactly vent, but just kind of like, I'm having a
tough time adapting to Texas. Helped me with this, and

(55:34):
I'm like, what do you need help with? And so
I helped her with the whole issue about Mexican food.
She wasn't used to Mexican food, she wasn't used to
a poor woman.

Speaker 1 (55:48):
Not used well, I mean you did say Philly, so yeah, well.

Speaker 4 (55:53):
Yeah she was. She was from Pittsburgh. She was from
Pittsburgh actually, so she wasn't really used to the Texas things,
and she wanted help with that. So I was kind
of like giving her a breakdown of.

Speaker 1 (56:10):
Of it.

Speaker 4 (56:11):
And eventually, you know it. She had a little girl
and I would I would babysit for her and all
that stuff. And then and then we started talking about
things that we liked to do, and we got into
the whole Pinterest crafting thing together, and so, you know,
and I helped. I would do some She had some
really pretty antique furniture. I stripped and restored a lot

(56:35):
of it for her, and in return, she loved to
did and she made me some beautiful throws that I
still have and everything. And to this day we still
chat at least once a week, even though I live
six hours from her now. But you know, she's still
and she's getting ready to retire from work, and you know,

(56:58):
and her daughters now and college by the graduate, and
you know, and her husband's like retiring to and all
this stuff and everything. So that moved her from that
casual into the inner circle. She and I are very
close and we you know, like I said, we talk
every week now. I've had where some of the casual

(57:19):
people just move further and just acquaintance type of thing
because they find other people that are more in tune
with what they do. And that's fine, that's always fine.
But for me, if you're in that small group, the

(57:41):
closest ring, that the smallest ring, and you leave it,
it's not because of me, it's because of them. And
the reason I say that is that. I've been known
to tell people that no matter what, if you need me,

(58:03):
you call me, no matter what time it is. I
faith her husband, uh had a really bad fall and
she told me about it and I said, I can
be there in six hours. I'll be you know, I
let me let me pack, we can, we can be there.

Speaker 1 (58:19):
And we did.

Speaker 4 (58:20):
We went and she was like, no, no, you guys
don't have to come, blah blah blah.

Speaker 1 (58:24):
No we did.

Speaker 4 (58:25):
We got to we left and we went make sure
that you know, things were taken care of and everything,
and it was it's just something you do, you know,
you do it for family. So that and that's how
I view them. I view them like they're part of
my family as well, just not blood related and not

(58:46):
marriage related. But if for some reason they moved out
of that circle, it's because they're moving on. It's not
because I kicked them out. So it's it's it's for me.
It's like Hotel California. Nice, but but on my side,

(59:07):
not on their side. Like I'm never gonna leave whatever
circle you put me in. I'm not gonna leave it.
I'm you know, And and if I'm invited to go
into an inner circle then you know, I will go
in and I take that seriously and like, you know,
and I know that sounds weird, but a friendship does

(59:29):
have to be cultivated. You do have to prune it,
you have to water it, you have to make sure
there's plenty of sunshine, and you have to guard it
from the Cold's it is. It is. It's like a
plant that you have outside, you know, And I know
that sounds weird, but it's true.

Speaker 2 (59:48):
For me.

Speaker 4 (59:50):
I have to work on my friendships the way I've
worked on my marriage, and I've worked with you know,
my relationship with my children, and I've worked with my
relationship with my parents. I do have to work with
my relationship with my friends too. I cannot take them
for granted, because the moment you start taking somebody for granted,
they're just going to say, well, you know, I guess

(01:00:10):
they're not there for me, and they will leave. And
that's why when somebody leaves, I feel like I look
at myself and see that I do something that I
push them out. No, most of the time they just
leave because they you know, they found somebody better, or
somebody closer, or or they found the love of their

(01:00:31):
life and now they want to devote their time to that,
you know, that kind of thing. But I learned a
long time ago not to ignore a friendship because I mine.
You know, my friendships have been ignored and they have withered.

(01:00:52):
And I had somebody from high school actually reach out
and say, hey, what happened to us? We used to
be such good friends. Said, well, frankly, I got tired
of sending you messages, emails. Yeah. I would email them,
you know, and you would respond with yeah, great to

(01:01:14):
hear from you. And that's it. And there was no
effort being put. And I mean, in all honesty, she
had the good grace to say, I'm sorry, I just
I mean, that's just the way I am. And I'm like,
and I get that, and I understand. But if you're

(01:01:37):
not going to be a friend, then friendship you can't
just be one way, you know. Now there are some friends,
like I said, like the friend that completely left all
my circles always have the door open. I've always said
that you can leave, and that's fine, but I'm not

(01:01:59):
going to close the door on you, except for you know,
my friend who broke my cousin's heart. That that I
not only closed that door I nailed it shut. Yes,
I'm a little bitter.

Speaker 6 (01:02:13):
You should have stabbed him again, he broke her heart. Okay,
so anyway you should have stabbed him, you told me.

Speaker 1 (01:02:24):
Yeah, so here you go. You're a poke.

Speaker 4 (01:02:27):
But you know it was you know, for me, I
just I just I just tend to think of myself
as I need to give two people expecting nothing in return.
Once I got to that point in my life where
I could do that, just giving and expecting nothing, it

(01:02:51):
became so much easier. It became so much easier to
be a friend and to be you know, because you're
You're like you're there and you don't have any you
don't question anything, You just give.

Speaker 1 (01:03:08):
But yeah, I mean for me, and you know, I
am one of those people sometimes I just need to
be left alone for a time. So I mean I have,
you know, distanced myself from friends, but I'll normally do it.
After I realized that the only time we ever communicate
is if I initiate the communication, if we go, if
we go two or three weeks and I'm the only

(01:03:28):
one starting things that are trying to get us to communicate,
and then I go a week or so to see
if anything ever happens and it turns into two weeks,
three weeks, four weeks, five weeks, six weeks, seven weeks,
And yes, I have friends like that, and then they'll
just pop up like three or four months later, go, hey,
how you do know what I like to do? Where
you've been for like four months? I asked you for
proof of life like two months ago because you stopped

(01:03:49):
responding to my messages. Oh sorry, it's been busy. I'm like, okay,
well cool, because I mean, I try not to be
one of those high maintenance friends. But if I'm the
one constantly trying to, you know, communicate, reach out, make
sure you're okay, see why we haven't talked in a
few days, et cetera, eventually that gets old. There has
to be at least some form of reciprocation.

Speaker 4 (01:04:11):
Yeah, there is, And you know, there are some friends
that every so often. I just had one reach out
to me. I haven't heard from her in five years.
And the reason that I hadn't heard from her in
five years, it's just that she took she took she
took COVID. Seriously, she just shut herself from the world completely,

(01:04:35):
and it did a lot of damage to her friendships
and everything. But and because I did not take COVID seriously,
she felt she had to like cut herself off from everybody,
from those people that didn't take it seriously. And I'm like,
I took it seriously, like I take the flu seriously.
But that's that's as far as I went with it,

(01:04:58):
you know. But because I I was not pushing for
all of these vaccines and I wasn't fan a fan
of the mask. And I actually said, you know, wearing
a mask is absolutely nothing. We we took biology and
school together and you know, my you know how big
viruses are, you know, mask is I mean, I was

(01:05:20):
trying to be like as as logical with her as
I could, and yeah, it didn't work, but she just
she came back, you know, and and it was it
was really you know, she sends me a message on
social media and asks me, you know, she said, hey,
I know it's been a while. I hope things are

(01:05:41):
great with you. And you know, she she was letting
me know she was going to be in town and
I had to tell her, well, it's weird. We moved
so I'm not in that town anymore. But you know,
but I go home periodically to visit my mom. So
I'll just I'll let you know when I'm in town,

(01:06:03):
and she's like that, you know, that'd be great. I
would love to, you know, touch base with you again.
So that was kind of nice, but I felt kind
of weird because it just it felt like she was
testing the waters, and.

Speaker 1 (01:06:21):
Well, be truthful, she probably was and been so long
since you guys have communicated. She was trying to see
if you or even willing the doctor her anymore. I
would be willing to.

Speaker 4 (01:06:28):
Bet yeah, And I think that's it. But it kind
of bothered me a little bit because she should have
known better. Because even though I will hold a grudge
until I am ashes and then take it with me
into the urn and stab people, when it comes to

(01:06:50):
something like you know, a friendship or something, I just
I don't close the door. We don't have enough friends.
You can never have enough friends. And it took me
so long to make my fris my first friend here
when I'm when I moved to the States, that I

(01:07:11):
I I can't ignore, you know, when somebody reaches out,
you know, and and and stuff like that. So I
try to be as as open and accommodating as possible
to people who may have shunned me for some reason
or another, but are willing to try and rebuild that

(01:07:31):
bridge sometimes, you know. You know, I always say that
friendship is like a bridge. You're you both have to
make sure that each side is still strong enough to
allow for passage, you know, to connect. And some friends
will just let your they're part of the bridge, you know,

(01:07:53):
fall into the water. And what they don't understand is,
you know, without that other side, this side of the
bridge will also fall into the water. So it's necessary
for people to actually work on that. And yeah, I
had I had a friend who completely burned a bridge

(01:08:14):
with me, and and it was it was tough, but
I read I said, you know what, we were friends before.
I'm sure we can be friends again, so let's just
start from the beginning. And he was willing to start
from the beginning. And yeah, we're good friends, but not

(01:08:39):
as good friends as we were when we were in school.
So it's more of a casual type of thing. But
at least that bridge is still working. That bridge is
still up. You know. He does reach out, you know,
and everything. I reach out and check in with him
and everything. And it has been okay, but yeah, the

(01:09:01):
the conflagration of that bridge the first time was epic
and it was not me doing it, so uh huh no, no, no, seriously,
it was it was it was a complete misunderstanding. We
were friends from college and his girlfriend was like, it

(01:09:30):
was like two years younger than he was. So when
we were seniors, she was like a sophomore or whatever,
and we had I was taking botany. He was in
the same class with me, and we had a thing,
you know, and everything. Uh, we had a project then
we needed to work on.

Speaker 1 (01:09:48):
We had to for that because y'all had a thing.
Sounded a little giggy.

Speaker 4 (01:09:53):
No, our our our project was we had attractive land
and we had to actually survey the entire tract and
to determine how many different types of species of flora
were growing in it. So that was our project. Well,
apparently his girlfriend was very jealous that his friend was

(01:10:17):
his partner in this, and she actually told him that
I said some mean things to him about her, you
know that I you know, I said mean things about
her to her, and that you know, she was hoping

(01:10:38):
that I was hoping that they would break up because
she wasn't good enough for him and all all sorts
of weird things. So she tells him this, and his
first mistake was thinking that I actually cared about his relationship,
because I didn't. It's second mistake was was actually accusing

(01:10:59):
me of this without asking me if I said anyf that.
And we had been friends for about three years, and
I looked at him and said, what are you talking about?
And he said, I don't want anything to do with you.
I can't believe that you would say those things to her,
and blah blah blah and all this stuff, said, never
want to talk to you again. As soon as this
class is over, we're done. And I was just like,

(01:11:21):
what just happened? I have no idea what happened? And
I tried talking to him and he would not talk
to me. This was before we had cell phones, mind you,
So I would call a landline in order to talk
to him. His roommate always fielded the calls because there
was no call. There was no Star sixty nine then either,

(01:11:45):
and so he would answer and if it was me,
he said, yeah, he doesn't want to talk to you.
And I mean, he completely cut me off completely, and
I had no idea why. I did not know It
wasn't until like a decade later that he reconnected with
me and he told me what happened, and I was like,

(01:12:08):
when did you find out? He says, well, I found out,
you know, after I graduated. We broke up because I
found out that she had lied. I said, that was wait,
that was ten years ago. What took you so long
to get in touch with me? And his excuse was
I was embarrassed.

Speaker 1 (01:12:29):
Yeah, well that actually, that's that's plausible.

Speaker 4 (01:12:35):
And I did not understand it because I'm not a guy.
I don't I can think something's like a guy can,
but I'm not a guy. So I looked at him
and I was like, are you serious right now? You
destroyed a friendship and then you found out just a
few months later that she was the one lying to you,
and you couldn't even tell me until now. I was

(01:12:57):
very addictant. I was very very indignant. Okay, and I
think this happened.

Speaker 1 (01:13:03):
I think the word you're looking for is stabby. You
were very stabby.

Speaker 4 (01:13:08):
I was not a happy camper. So and he was like, well,
you know, I'm I'm reaching out now, And of course
he's all upset and everything, and I had to calm down.
And of course, you know, this was a tense reunion
for for our class, and and he and at at

(01:13:28):
college and I sat there and I was like, you
know what, You're right, You're at least making the effort,
and and he was like, I just I'm I'm really sorry.
I said, that's fine, Let's just start from the beginning,
you know. And I was okay with that. I was

(01:13:51):
okay with that because he was I recognized that he
was making the effort, that he was embarrassed. And he
was embarrassed because has he let her be the But
I mean, was what was he supposed to do? That
was his girlfriend, right, So he felt I should believe her,

(01:14:16):
you know, and everything. But what he understood much later
was I should have asked her too. I should have
asked Aggie if she had said those things. I just
rushed to judgment, rush to conclusion, and I did not ask.
And he was embarrassed about it. But the fact that
he finally, after so many years, he actually came up

(01:14:37):
and said that to me and was willing to say
that he was sorry. That was good enough. That was
enough for me to accept that he wanted the friendship back,
and we could start building that bridge again, and we did.
You know it. Like I said, friendships have to be cultivated.
They're not going to flourish on their own. You have

(01:15:01):
to put an effort even of those like like yours
from kindergarten, and and and mine from my my my
cousin's ex who anyway him. I'm gonna call my cousin

(01:15:22):
tomorrow and I'm gonna tell her all about this and
she will say, yeah, never forgive him, because I haven't either.
And I'm like, you're you're happily married, your daughter just
graduated from college. She's like, I don't care, but but yeah,

(01:15:42):
I just you know, sometimes the just making the effort
to actually re establish reconnect with somebody is enough to
you know, they're opening the door. They're they're wanting to
go through the door that you left open, I should
say unlocked, because some people don't see that the door

(01:16:04):
is open, they don't see that they can walk through it.
And you have to be able to actually tell them, hey,
you know, you're always welcome to come through that door.
And I have told everyone that for some you know
who have told me, yeah, I can't be you know,

(01:16:26):
you know, this friendship is not working for me or whatever.
And usually it has been because of politics. Lord knows.
I lost quite a few people who were not fond
of Trump in twenty sixteen, and one of them was.

Speaker 1 (01:16:43):
Yet, you voted for the evil man with the orange hair?

Speaker 4 (01:16:46):
Really, what are you thinking? Well, the thing was I
lost these people because I wasn't never Trump enough. I
didn't like Trump, you know, in twenty sixteen. I mean,
I like him more now than I did then, and
even now I have my issues with him. But in
twenty sixteen, you know, like, but we were down to

(01:17:09):
that choice, you know, that kind of thing. But I
because I was not vocal enough denouncing him on social media.
I had people saying, you're not good enough to be
my friend. And I'm like, well, I'm I don't know
what to tell you. I will not be dictated to
by anyone on how to feel about any political figure ever.

(01:17:33):
But I but I told them this, and this was
this was a really good friend of mine. I said,
I am not closing the door on this. If you
decide that this friendship is not for you, that's fine.
But I did bank that decision. And if you want
to ever come back, all you have to do is

(01:17:54):
reach out. That was the last thing I said to him.
I know he read it, but he never acknowledged it,
and to this day he still hasn't and he's still very,
very angry about the fact that Trump is in the
White House, and I'm like, you need you need to
let it go, buddy, You just need to let it go.

Speaker 1 (01:18:16):
Nice. So you remember before the show you were telling
me about the White House troll that you were like,
oh my god, So Department of State got in on it.
I don't know if you've seen that yet or not.

Speaker 4 (01:18:29):
No, I have not.

Speaker 1 (01:18:31):
So they put it they from the White House and
then said we heard blue Sky is a great place
to research visa revocation and then linked to their blue
Sky account they just created apparently. So I don't know
who's running the social media for Trump this time, but
they are on fire and I'm.

Speaker 4 (01:18:52):
Loving every minute of it because, yeah, and it has
been interesting.

Speaker 1 (01:18:57):
I think Baron has a lot to do with it,
if I'm being honest, I think he's kind of pulling
some things behind the screens or behind the scenes because
they're they're they're way too on point this time compared
to what they were during Trump one point zero but
not to interrupt the show. But that that killed me
because stay, I saw Stacy quote tweet the other one
and was died laughing. And then I thought, and then
that one showed up on my feet next and I

(01:19:18):
was like, I wonder how many other great check accounts
are going to get on get on on this before
the night's over. But anyway, but since I did kill
the momentum, we should probably do this real quick while
we still have people listening. So next week there will
be no he said, she said, but there will be
something even cooler in its place. So the Calor and

(01:19:40):
Radio players will be doing next week the Day the
Earth Stood Still, our our our spooky season play. We're
bringing sexy back with The Day the Earth Stood Still,
and we've got some old hat folks returning to I'm
not gonna give away too many secrets yet, but you
guys should really tune in if you can. There also
will be a play and aparently to do a cast

(01:20:01):
after party on the same feed where apparently they're going
to announce what the winter play is going to be.
And I say they because I typically has to be
left out of these decisions because I like to be
as surprise, as you guys are. I know what it
is with everybody but me.

Speaker 4 (01:20:22):
I I only know because I was offering some advice
on certain characters. So that's about it. That's that's the
only the only reason. No, I'm excited. They the earth
to itself and it's it's funny. I went to go
pull it up, and of course the only one that's
available on demand is the newer one with Keanu Reeves,

(01:20:44):
and I'm like, I'm to be watching that. I love Kiano,
I love Keanu. Keanu is amazing. I don't care what
anybody says.

Speaker 1 (01:20:53):
I love it.

Speaker 4 (01:20:54):
But I wanted to watch the old one, the one
with Michael Rennie, and it's not available, so I have
to go find it somewhere. That's gonna be my my
my thing for tomorrow.

Speaker 1 (01:21:08):
But yeah, so I just wanted to make sure to
bring that up because we've got lots of people paying
attention to us right now, so I wanted to make
sure to plug it properly before Jeff dropped into the
chat again and said, hey, plug the play, dammit, I've
been doing that a lot.

Speaker 4 (01:21:22):
Well, yes, yours, yours truly will be in in the
in the play that's gonna be a lot of fun,
I think. And yes, yes, m I will be watching
Spanouli tomorrow because it's going to be young Frankistid.

Speaker 1 (01:21:44):
I'm so excited.

Speaker 4 (01:21:45):
I'll be painting my little ghost paintings too. Yeah, tomorrow
is all a day a day for me. I'm going
to be doing my little ghost thing and and uh
and just entertaining myself with painting and doing that. And
I might call up a few friends and just actually

(01:22:06):
do FaceTime while we do this, because we did that
last year and it was a lot of fun.

Speaker 1 (01:22:13):
Oh that's kind of awesome. Yeah, everybody wants to FaceTime
be all the time, and I'm like, dude, no, well
it was.

Speaker 4 (01:22:22):
It was a lot easier when we had Skype, but
Skype is no longer supported and I didn't want Microsoft teams,
so I just let that go. And so that we
were looking for something else to do. And I know
that we can zoom, but I don't like zoom, and
so we just do it via the phone. You know,

(01:22:45):
it's fun. I'm not divulging what part I am playing.
I just I'm just saying that I will be on
this production. That's all I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (01:23:01):
Yeah, she's not giving away any secrets. Man, it's not happening.
It's not happening.

Speaker 4 (01:23:09):
Well, it's funny because it's during sven Gooli. It's Young
Frankenstein and then houses ven Gooli the show. After that,
it's gonna be Frankenstein, the old thirties movie. So I'm like,
I'm so jazz. It's all Frankenstein all day long. Yay,
I should paint Little Frankenstein's instead of little Ghosts.

Speaker 1 (01:23:35):
Anyway, but I was looking because I thought I found
somewhere for you to be able to watch it. But
apparently if it is here, you have to subscribe, So
never mind.

Speaker 4 (01:23:43):
I think, I think I have it on DVD. I
just have to go look. I remember I bought like
a set of you know, old nineteen fifties sci fi.
You know, you can buy the set of DVDs with
all sorts of old movies, and and I think Alm
was in it. I know that The Forbidden Planet was
in it. It was a fun one.

Speaker 1 (01:24:06):
So yeah, there's a there's a new thing. I just
found because I asked, you know, my little production this
system I've been using lately, if there was anywhere to
stream it, because it's usually pretty good to find it's
of it. I mean about something called cold Pics that
said it might have it, But I've never heard of
that before, so.

Speaker 4 (01:24:25):
Me neither, that's new. That's new.

Speaker 1 (01:24:31):
It doesn't It doesn't have a search option, so I
can't go find out.

Speaker 4 (01:24:35):
So anyway, I'm sure I have it in my DVDs somewhere.
It's probably they're probably next to the because I keep
on my box sets together. Yeah, I still use tvds. People,
I don't stream anything. Uh well, I you know, just
a couple of things, but that's about it.

Speaker 1 (01:24:52):
Oh yeah, I forgot your old school.

Speaker 4 (01:24:54):
Anyway, I still have VHS. I mean I still have VHS.
I have a Beta Max.

Speaker 1 (01:25:06):
I would probably care more about videotapes if they did
with Beta Max. Beta Max was the such better format,
just VHS was marketed better. Kind of like the difference
between Showby's Pizza and the Damn Rat. Shoby's pizza was
so much better, but the Rat got marketed better. M Yeah, oh, anyway,

(01:25:28):
we have I believe it or not, pretty much come
to the end of our time together.

Speaker 4 (01:25:31):
For the Yeah, yeah, so that was a fun discussion.

Speaker 1 (01:25:37):
Yeah, we got to hear about Aggie the Stabber.

Speaker 4 (01:25:40):
Yes, listen, this statute of limitations expired a long time ago.
I'm just going to reiterate that, yes, yes, it did
so anyway, so Rick, why don't you tell us where
we can find you?

Speaker 1 (01:26:00):
Don't look for me to trap you can find me.
Tomorrow night for juxtaposition, we are continuing our deep dive
into the spooky season topic for us for the month
for October. Tomorrow night, we're doing cryptids of the Air.
So far we've done some of the more well the
lesser known land cryptids than Last week was water cryptids.

(01:26:22):
This week is air cryptids, and then we are going
to do I think some of the more popular ones
in week four and then a round table so everybody
can kind of talk about their favorite ones.

Speaker 4 (01:26:33):
In week five, we're doing which ones Tomorrow night, Cryptids.

Speaker 1 (01:26:38):
Of the Air of the Air?

Speaker 4 (01:26:40):
Okay, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:26:43):
Alish is running this one because he's got his chat
GPT beaten in this submission, so it takes him like
twenty minutes to thirty minutes to get a decent stroke
put together. I'm getting mine that way, but mine does
more of the political stuff, so when I start trying
to get it to do juxtaposition it like as a stroke.

Speaker 4 (01:27:03):
Dude.

Speaker 1 (01:27:03):
So speaking of which, and then I'll finish wrapping up
one of the things that has absolutely given me crazy
about chat GBT because I'm still trying to learn what
it can and can't do since I've been paying, since
I actually have the paid version now, so I will
ask it if it can do something and it's like, yeah, sure.
So I go through all the steps it gives me
to do it, and then it just is there and
I'm like, I notice you haven't started doing it yet.
Oh I'm sorry, I actually can't do that. What I

(01:27:27):
just spent fifteen minutes with you telling me how to
do something, and well, really, what you would need to
do is do this, this, this, and this first. And
why didn't you tell me that in the first place?
You a little stupid. Now I understand why fucking Luke
Skywalker was always trying to beat it out of art.
I really do anyway, So yeah, I'll be doing that

(01:27:47):
tomorrow night, Sunday night. Kreenham and Country Corn Show is
going to be on hiatus for a while. He is
like Needy Bean Hollywood related stuff and it's suposed to
let me know when he's able to come back up
for air. Monday night we will be doing of Course,
America Off the Rails uh and then Tuesday, the Rick
Robinson Show kicks off again. That's Tuesday through Friday, Tuesday
night Manorama. For everything else, feel free to check the

(01:28:09):
schedule because you know I work all the day time.
When I'm not doing all that, you can find me
as a contributor at twitty dot com, Misfitspolitics dot com,
the Loftist Party dot com, and I also produced the
Loftist Party podcast under the production company Umbrella that I'll
be officially forming in a couple of months. So yeah,
I'll be working on new clients under that Umbrellas too

(01:28:30):
for anybody who's interested. But other than that, you can
find me at Roderick send Me three. You can follow
along with the station at Kalarm Radio. And how about you, Aggie,
working folks. Find more of you when you're not trying
to stab people.

Speaker 4 (01:28:45):
Wow? Yeah, nice, nice done. You can find me at
Aggie the Barkeep, And you can find me a thirty
pm Eastern Tuesday nights doing the Cocktail Lounge with the
Everslav Slacker a thirty pm Eastern Friday night's doing, he said,
she said, with the awesome you. And the second Wednesday

(01:29:08):
of every month at a PM, the guys get together
for Toxic Masculinity and I bring the drink of the evening.
And last but not least, Jeff and I now do
spirited Books on the first Monday of every month at
eight thirty pm Eastern and where that's where we you know,
review books that are slightly outside of our comfort zone.

(01:29:29):
Sometimes way out of our comfort zone.

Speaker 1 (01:29:33):
At least, she says, but they are good sports. They
usually try to figure out a way to work their
book podcast into the same theme that we can.

Speaker 4 (01:29:41):
Yeah, never again, she's, so, I don't think it's.

Speaker 1 (01:29:45):
Going to happen next year. She's, yeah, it probably will.

Speaker 4 (01:29:51):
Oh my word, I told I told my sister about that.
Nice und her the link and she was like, you've
read that.

Speaker 1 (01:30:02):
Who knew there were chop of cobra porns. So I'm
gonna say bye every good night. By the way, you
can't see her, but she's purple right now accent. I
am say good night, Gracie.