All Episodes

September 5, 2025 • 94 mins
Mark as Played
Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Ah, it's got the Beata King.

Speaker 2 (01:14):
Welcome everyone to another episode. If he said, she said,
I am one of your hosts for tonight, Aggie, and
with me is special guest host Jeff, who is covering
for our awesome rowdy Rick, how are you doing tonight?

Speaker 3 (01:31):
I am in a mood tonight, and you know what
that usually means. When he said, she said.

Speaker 2 (01:37):
We should all be afraid.

Speaker 3 (01:39):
Yes, yes, if it helps explain things to anyone listening,
I am drinking zero sugar Mountain dew and a Long
Island iced tea.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
Wow, that's I Yeah, I got nothing. I'm drinking actually
dyet green tea. I just as y'all know, I've been
trying to lose the weight that came along when my
mom was staying with me and was cooking all the

(02:21):
things and feeding me so gloriously. So I've been baking
a concerned effort to yeah, set those pesky little pounds.

Speaker 3 (02:32):
You know, I can understand that. I used to I
used to hate going back home because I always did
feel like I couldn't fit in my pants driving the
eight and a half hours back home. I mean that,
and you know, loading up on sheets food because I
was leaving the happy praise land of sheets and going
back to Cumberland farmland. So yeah, I understand. Hopefully it's

(02:59):
going on.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
So far, I have managed to shed seven pounds since
my mom left, so that I'm on track to getting
back to I'm at one twenty seven right now, and
my normals between one twenty and one twenty three, So
just a little bit more and then I can fit
comfortably back again in my clothing.

Speaker 3 (03:24):
I'm only I'm only about one hundred and fifteen pounds
more than you. Yay.

Speaker 2 (03:29):
You're also like two feet taller than I. I don't
think that this is an issue for you. As a
matter of fact, I think you need to gain more weight,
so I need to redistribute.

Speaker 3 (03:42):
I need to redistribute my weight more than anything else.
So yeah, I'm working on it. I managed to walk
three point eight miles today against my will, but I
did it, so you know. Right now, my ankle and
cap is tighter than a virgin on Promni. But it
doesn't hurt. Hurt.

Speaker 2 (04:05):
Oh, Danielle's so sweet. She's the same way I am.
But Danielle's also caller than I am. She does not
look like a little wee bole.

Speaker 3 (04:15):
Like I do.

Speaker 2 (04:20):
So. Yeah. So unfortunately Rick was not feeling very well.
He lost his voice, and so I asked our beloved
producer Jeff to come in and guest host for this evening,
which is why he took it upon himself to create
a whole new graphic for the show that was so

(04:47):
on brand.

Speaker 3 (04:50):
See, this is the problem when you give an alien
thirty minutes to prep. Yeah, true, just saying, And I
didn't even show you the stuff I was going to do.

Speaker 2 (05:04):
I should be afraid.

Speaker 3 (05:06):
I won't reveal yet. But it has to do with
that thing I showed you. But we each sort of
had one with something we were going to talk about,
so it was a lot more detailed. But I was like,
it didn't match the decoration that I have of our

(05:27):
American Soviet banner of he said, She said, obey the podcast,
So I scrapped it.

Speaker 2 (05:37):
Obey the podcast. That's very cute. That's very cute. I
think I'm going to get pilloried for a couple of mine,
for sure, since we took time to discuss are you
know some of the ones that we had written down
tonight's topic being our favorite Dick TACs decrees. If we were,

(05:59):
you know, to talk around all of politics is how
our president is turning into a dictator. Meanwhile, I'm looking
at countries where they were actual going those who are
leaving that place to come over here. So just turning
into a dictator. I don't think they're getting the better

(06:19):
into the deal.

Speaker 3 (06:22):
Yeah, and I had to be reprimanded before the show. Well,
Aggie would have understood it. I was told I was
not allowed to do my dictorial German tonight.

Speaker 2 (06:34):
So yeah that isn't ye but it oppened nine.

Speaker 3 (06:44):
Yeah, yeah, so I'm stucky with Finnish no, I mean
English for tonight. So we'll see how this goes. But yeah,
it's it's been an interesting time with the misappropriation of
words thrown around. I don't get it.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
No, it's it's part of the you know, we've discussed
this before over on the Cocktail Lounge and several other
podcasts where the those that control the language control the culture,
and this is a move to actually try and do that.
So we decided to poke fun at it, because that's

(07:30):
what we do here, We poke fun at things.

Speaker 3 (07:32):
Oh absolutely, I mean what else what else can you
really do? I mean we can be sour pusses like eighty. Well, no,
what is it sixty three and a half percent of
the state of her mind that that's puckered up so
much you hate being around them, or you can have fun.

(07:52):
I don't know about you, Aggie, but I prefer the
fun side of life a little bit more than the
making diamond in my butt.

Speaker 2 (08:04):
When you said that, the line from Paris Buller popped
in my head. Can is up tight? Yes, in two
weeks you'd have a diamond. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (08:19):
I honestly wasn't going there. But I see the connection.
I really do.

Speaker 2 (08:23):
Yeah, yeah, I Unfortunately, you know, I know lots of
people like that, and it's not just it's more pervasive
on one side of the political aisle, but uh, hardside
has their hair so oh.

Speaker 3 (08:36):
One hundred percent. I mean, I cannot say where I
was at today, but let's just say it was a
higher education location in the state of Vermont. Above that's
a that's a step allegedly above high school. And to

(08:56):
have to sit there and smile at the conversations I
ever heard without looking at them and going you are
by far the dumbest individual I have ever met. Until
I go down this hallway and meet one of your
classmates and then that one will be the dumbest individual

(09:17):
I have ever. It was, And the worst part is
half of it was the teachers. I was hearing this
crap from the one anti spiel against Trump and Eline
like he they didn't get the memo that those two
really aren't talking anymore. I was like, hello, three months ago,

(09:43):
it's calling. You want to answer? It was.

Speaker 2 (09:47):
I get to feel that your moth is kind of
like close off, like that area is kind of like
they catch up on everything else, like six months down
the line they do. I used to see that when
I lived in Germany. When it came to music, they
were about twenty years behind the US. I'm not even joking.

(10:08):
I am not kidding at all. Aside from the umpa
lumpa music, which was awesome, I love Polka. I'm not
gonna lie. I really enjoy it.

Speaker 3 (10:19):
The great environment.

Speaker 2 (10:20):
Yeah, their top forty hits, you know I would. I
had heard in nineteen ninety so, and I was there
in two thousand and three and I was like, wow, Okay,
that's weird.

Speaker 3 (10:35):
The best way I can describe it.

Speaker 2 (10:38):
Is Alco, You're hurting my head. You're hurting my head
in my heart.

Speaker 3 (10:45):
The sheer number of individuals in Vermont who do not
know that Ben and Jerry is owned by a Unilever
is heartbreaking breaking. It is sad that these people don't
know that. It is sad that they don't know Green

(11:06):
Mountain Coffee is now Doctor Pepper owned. Ha ha ha.
Don't get me wrong. I love a good Doctor Pepper.
I mean it's no zero sugar Mountain do almost nine
o'clock at night.

Speaker 2 (11:19):
When you come, when you come visit, it's gonna be
Doctor Pepper with real cane sugar. That's all. I stuck
here from a box is proper. I don't even go
to a can.

Speaker 3 (11:30):
I go to the so that this is a way.
There is no other. Everything else is a different timeline
that I hate.

Speaker 2 (11:38):
Stupid.

Speaker 3 (11:40):
Thank you for being on the right timeline. Unlike already
who still thinks Finland isn't real.

Speaker 2 (11:46):
It's not real. But we won't go there today. We
can do that tomorrow night anyway.

Speaker 3 (11:58):
But yeah, it disheartening to see and I sometimes I
don't even want to say it's stupidity or dumbness, it's laziness.
They get a thought in their head and don't want
to even explore the possibility that the time has changed,

(12:22):
that some new information has been gathered and relayed, and
they just decide to go, eh, let's watch something else
on you know, channel two hundred and seventy nine.

Speaker 2 (12:39):
It's amazing to me. I see it here too, but
on a smaller scale because I am in East Texas.
But when I go visit my sister, I see it
more prevalence since she's in San Antonio. And it's almost like,
you know, she my sister works for the federal government,

(13:00):
and it's it's like it's really weird to watch because
she questions the weirdest things, and I'm like, you're you're
question why are you questioning this? It's just a you know,
like for example, we had the current kerfuffle is dealing
with the uh change of the Department of Defense, you know,

(13:27):
so back to the you know, and I'm all for
the call it the war Department. I mean, we call
it the State Department. Call it the war Department. You know,
just just let's go even harder, Okay, uh, but use up.

Speaker 3 (13:44):
You know.

Speaker 2 (13:44):
It's like Derek Hunter said this earlier. Uh he has
a he has a show, and he said, I don't
mind the name change. You know you're gonna do that.
You're gonna do it, but use up all of the
stuff that already has Department of Defense on it. Don't
toss it out. No is that paid for that stuff.
Use it up, yes, exactly. But the weird thing is

(14:06):
what a lot of people don't know is that the
Eisenhower Building where the Secretary of State, excuse me, this
secret of the Army said, all of those people have
their offices. The doorknobs are still still have you know,
Department of War, Department, you know those they're still on

(14:29):
the doorknobs. And of course you know they're not going
to change the doorknobs because those are antiques. They're like
they're hand forged, and you know.

Speaker 3 (14:36):
They're beautiful.

Speaker 2 (14:38):
I would I would give my arm for one because
they are so detailed. I cannot I cannot tell you
how detailed these things are and how beautiful the craftsmanship
of each one of these things, because they're all different.
So they never bother changing that, you know, and and

(14:58):
and I'm like, so basic, you know, that's one lest
things to change as far as I'm concerned. Yeah, absolutely,
But you know there were people, you know, my sister
like I said. My sister was like, I can't believe that.
You know, this is so this is like, you know,
the dictator saying change this. Now. She's a Trump supporter,
don't get me wrong, but for her it was like,

(15:22):
I can't you know this is the kind of stuff
dictators to I said, no, no, it's not. A dictator
doesn't do paperwork change. A dictator doesn't do that. The
dictator actually changes things that affect you on every level.
This is not going to affect anybody, it honestly isn't.

Speaker 3 (15:42):
No.

Speaker 2 (15:42):
Now, the thing is, you know, having something called the
Department of Defense for us, it's kinds I'll say, it's defensive,
you know, and it doesn't promote our strength at all.
Reverting back to its original you know, to the original name,
you know, Department of War or war Department or whatever

(16:03):
you want to call it, that actually establishes its main goal.
And I, you know, was talking to some of my
friends in Germany over this name change and they were
not happy about it, and I was like, what, why,
how does it affect you? And one of them was

(16:25):
very revealing. My girlfriend actually told me, she said she
was translating because it was her girlfriend that was sitting
with her. We were, you know, facetiming or whatever, and
her girlfriend was like very gesticulating and all this stuff
and everything, and she said, and my girlfriend turned to
the camera and said, it just makes it sound like

(16:49):
you guys are ready to fight. And I said, Monica,
you've lived here, of course we're ready to fight. That's
the whole point. And I said, I don't understand why
why is that so controversial. Every single army, every single
military force of every country, that's their job. And she's like, well,

(17:15):
I don't see it that way. I don't think that
that's what the Seriously, she said, I don't think that's
what the bundesper should be doing. I'm like, what the
heck what? It's just like, okay, we're gonna stop right now.

Speaker 3 (17:27):
Be glad they went with the John Adams Department of War,
not what Thomas Jefferson wanted. Jefferson wanted to depart Department
of whooping the pirates.

Speaker 2 (17:36):
Ass yes, pretty much, and so you know, the.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
Department of War could compromise here.

Speaker 2 (17:46):
I was just like, I was kind of stunned that
I was getting that from several people that live over
in the European sector. And that was their main issue
was that it makes to sound like we're ready to fight,
and I'm like, I think we've had achievement unlocked here. Okay,

(18:08):
we have finally achievement unlocked.

Speaker 3 (18:11):
Yes, we had been ready to kick everyone's ass, or
maybe maybe there was maybe a fifty seven second gap
somewhere that we weren't. That's the kind of the whole purpose.
I mean, just look back at the Barbary pirates in
this in the story about how all the European countries

(18:33):
are like, you should just pay them, just pay them,
they'll leave you alone.

Speaker 2 (18:47):
So you know, I was basically motivate every week I
try to think of something to talk about, you know, tonight,
and this is pretty close to like the most political
one that we've done in a while before, he said,
She said, but.

Speaker 3 (19:05):
But I get it. You know how people have me
on the talk politics.

Speaker 2 (19:11):
Wow, really you don't, I good? No, Okay, I have.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
To drop little nuggets during lost wonder about politics every
now and then to see if someone catches it.

Speaker 2 (19:23):
Okay, we need to change this. We definitely need to
change this politics from an alien perspective.

Speaker 3 (19:30):
Before, yes, before we get into the meat of this matter, though,
I do want to tell you this. I so you
know there's moments in life where dictatorship is actually good,
is when you have the power to change something to
make someone's life better. And I'm going to try to

(19:55):
dance around this as lightly as I can to protect everyone.
I was communicating with the assistant to the dean of
that university, iforementioned beforehand, and while I was there helping
them out with an issue, a phone call came in
from a mother who was distressed because her son was

(20:22):
unable to get into the radio broadcast room. Now, of
course I hear radio broadcast and go, hum, hm, you know,
so my ears. I unfortunately did pick up a lot
more of the conversation, but I know the assistant to
the dean and we've had communication talks before, So after

(20:43):
she hung up, she was telling me the entire story.
And at another off site campus, they created a little
room to have a sound old soundboard that they don't
use for this woman's child, who has been going there

(21:04):
for six years. He is mentally retarded, and it was
her half hour. She takes him to the college, puts
him in the room. He gets to play radio for
thirty minutes, and she you know, there's teachers and other

(21:25):
people around, so he's not like alone alone, but she
gets thirty minutes to decompress. So she was stressing out
that her thirty minutes of decompression for her, I'm going
to assume here twenty to twenty five year old retarded
son was gone. Now. That campus never told the main

(21:48):
campus that this was happening, so the associate assistant to
the dean didn't know what was going on. So she quickly, amazingly,
I was really impress pieced it all together. And she's like,
you know what, I she just we're done here. I'm
going to give that location a call. We're going to
make sure everything's set up and ready to go. And

(22:11):
when she was telling me the story, you could almost
see the tears in her eyes because she was proud
of whoever made that decision on the off campus to
do that for him and for her, because he got
thirty minutes of absolute bliss and his mom got to
catch a break.

Speaker 2 (22:35):
That is so sweet.

Speaker 3 (22:36):
And I'm like, yeah, someone there at this off campus
made a dictorial decision to make this happen and to
make sure nothing would be banished or prevented from happening.
He didn't say a word, just to make those two
people happy, and I was like, you know what, some

(23:03):
of this state doesn't suck.

Speaker 2 (23:06):
Yeah, I've for clipped.

Speaker 3 (23:09):
Oh that's okay. We'll change your mood once we start
our top five list.

Speaker 2 (23:14):
Okay, so with that, I guess we should get into it.

Speaker 3 (23:17):
Oh hold on, hold on, are we gonna stop? Start
our our top five dictorial notes? I got I got
something special for us.

Speaker 2 (23:28):
Okay, here we go, Number five. I saw you sometimes
you amaze me. No, you amaze me all the time.
I gotta say, because y'all crying.

Speaker 3 (23:49):
You know, the hardest part of this was lining it
up with a damn graphic. I spend more time lining
it up than I did creating the code to do it.

Speaker 2 (24:00):
Well, that's impressive. I will say, you need to like
shell this because I'm sure that we're going to have
another show that's going to need this.

Speaker 3 (24:08):
Code, absolutely absolutely, and they're already. I did some code
without showing you first. I win finally sort of kind
of or is it you that won? I don't know.

Speaker 2 (24:23):
Somebody won something somewhere somehow. So okay, so since you're
the guest host, you should go first. What's your number five?

Speaker 3 (24:34):
Okay, number five for me? And this is the part
where I was actually gonna break down two two lines
for each of us and type it in as we
went along with what our top five was, because I
could have totally done that, but I just didn't look good.
So number five for me, and no m it did not.

(25:01):
Ghost Runner on second in baseball and extra inning shall
forever be banned, and I, as the new dictator of everything,
shall become every sports commissioner for life and maybe my
next life too, because the wiscification of sports has made

(25:24):
me sick. Now to help you vote for me, because
all votes are fake in a dictatorship. I have a
slogan ghost Runners, no ghost commissioner. Oh hell yeah, there
you go. No I am. I am sick and tired

(25:50):
of watching sports now. I played hockey at a decent level.
I know all the chippiness, I know all the god
that I could spend hours just talking about stuff I've
seen on the ice and on the sport court. It

(26:11):
is not for the fame of heart, but yet I
watch some of these sports and it's just like really
like last night, last night, as we are going live,
was the last night Yeah, with the culture ship with
Brandon Orty. A guy for the Philadelphia Eagles got ejected

(26:34):
for the game for spitting on Dak Prescott.

Speaker 2 (26:38):
I saw that.

Speaker 3 (26:40):
Yeah, was it disgusting? Absolutely? Is the guy who did
it an absolute frickin moron? Yes, ejected from the game
for spitting. Do these guys not know that during the
seventies and eight, these the sinners for these football teams

(27:02):
would urinate in their pants during the game, and I
should be concerned about a littlepit hmm.

Speaker 2 (27:22):
I was really stunned when I saw that actually happen
and I and I hate this rivalry. First of all,
I will clarify, I don't even like the Cowboys, all right,
I just I don't. But you're raised to actually believe

(27:48):
in good sportsmanship, and that is something that has been
missing from a lot of professional sports for a very
long time. And this is proof. This is just another
piece proof in my opinion, and the regularity with which
happens is very concerning, because good sports good sportsmanship isn't

(28:11):
being taught anymore, at least not that I can see.

Speaker 3 (28:16):
And it starts at a youth level. I've seen, Yes,
I've seen videos of seven and eight year old football
players humping the ground after a touchdown. That ain't right,
okay it I have yanked kids because my best friend

(28:42):
and I who was he was my defenseman. I was
the goalie on the on our semi pro team. We
have yanked kids or doing something disturbing. And this was
twenty years ago. Like we would literally just stop the
game because it was five to eight year olds. I mean,
we're there to teach them. So they did something outrageous

(29:07):
or stupid, we immediately called time out, went out, grabbed them,
pulled them into the bench, and reamed them a new
asshole for the next two minutes. We wanted to make
sure that thought never entered their mind again. If they
want to hump the ground after a goal, you get

(29:30):
off the court, off the bench, back in the back
so no one else can see, and you can go
fricking masturbait you're until you're dry as a bone. If
you do it out in front of anyone, especially your
teammates or your opponents, that's disrespectful. Don't do that, and
it's it's it's incredible that it's not where it's at.

(29:52):
I mean, I catch a couple of games over at
the arena across the street at the high school, and
it's not as bad. But Vermond, Oh, let's face it there,
we're cold here nine months out of the twelve, so
they love hockey up here. They're a little more respectful
to hockey than maybe some of the other games. But

(30:14):
you see it at the little league in baseball, where
the manager of the team is only concerned about his
or her son or daughter and the rest of the
team can go run around and play around at ten,
eleven and twelve like they have no care in the world.
And it's like, okay, it's leadership issues, adults. You're the

(30:36):
one who are supposed to set the example. Do it,
Please do the right one.

Speaker 2 (30:47):
I just it's so disappointing to watch. Asn't matter if
I this is. I was not even watching the game.
I just happened to be in the same room when
it happened, and it happened to catch it. I gave
up watching NFL years ago, and I just mostly rely
on Brad to give me the update of what happened,

(31:08):
because he knows I don't watch it. He knows I
get on the on the whole thing years ago. But anyway,
you should you should become the ghost what did you
call it?

Speaker 3 (31:25):
Commissioner, commissioner those commissioner for life and for the next life,
because sports would get better.

Speaker 2 (31:32):
Yeah, it would, I think, I think so. I think.
So you got my vote. Do we get votes in
a dictatorship?

Speaker 3 (31:43):
They're okay, they all count the ones that are for me.

Speaker 2 (31:50):
They count twice if they're for you.

Speaker 3 (31:52):
Okay, Well you're allowed to check the box with your
left and right hand. So two boats. I mean, are
we really stretching it here?

Speaker 2 (32:01):
To me, it's logical, yeah, very very true. Okay, sure
my number five. Yes, we discussed this. You agreed, and
I know that I have your roade on this. Even
though you have a glorious mane of hair, if you
were to step through my door with one of these,
I would take my knife to it. I would not

(32:25):
I wouldn't even question it. I would. Yeah, my fifth
decree as Empress. I'm not even gonna go with dictator
because that sounds measy. I'm just gonna stick to Empress. Okay,
no more man buns. That's got to go. That is
a fashion faux pad that I cannot abide. I don't

(32:49):
care if a guy has long hair, guy can have
long hair. It's what really irks me about a guy
with long hair is that his hair is usually prettier
than mine. Yes, women's I know. Women spend so much
money trying to make their hair look beautiful. Guys use

(33:10):
Ajax dishwashing liquid and look like they just stepped out
of a salon. I don't get it. I really don't.

Speaker 3 (33:17):
Yeah, you don't want to see his hair, then no.

Speaker 2 (33:20):
Take pride and having long hair don't capture it in
a man. But it makes it. First of all, you're
hiding your hair. The second of all, it doesn't look good.
It's silly.

Speaker 3 (33:31):
I don't like there's only one man on the face
of the planet who can wear man bun. And I
hate the fact that I don't know the actor's name,
but he is every badass Japanese samurai guy ever.

Speaker 2 (33:46):
Oh okay, if you're Japanese you get total total pass
on this.

Speaker 3 (33:51):
But this guy especially, But yes, yes.

Speaker 2 (33:55):
Are you talking about the guy from Ronan, the bad
guy from.

Speaker 3 (33:57):
Ronan Roan last Amurai. He was also in that movie
about the Baseball Catcher who was a spy who was
apparently the Japanese gay lover, but that was all fake
was he the.

Speaker 2 (34:09):
Guy in Battleship.

Speaker 3 (34:13):
I think so?

Speaker 2 (34:14):
Okay, yeah him, him, Yeah, totally, he can totally wear that.

Speaker 3 (34:17):
And I know.

Speaker 2 (34:18):
Rain who is also a Japanese actor. He was in
that Ninja Assassins. Oh yeah, I love that movie.

Speaker 3 (34:25):
Yeah, there are a few of them. But yes, unless
you match that very narrow, narrow definition, you absolutely have
my support on on this one. Like I you want,
you want to know the truth. M I will wear

(34:46):
pigtails before I put my hair in a man one.
I will pull him to the side. I will freaking
princess laya my hair before I put it up in
a man bun. And I know you now have Halloween

(35:12):
visions dancing in your head like little sugar plum fairies
at a Christmas time.

Speaker 2 (35:22):
Yeah. Look, I love you.

Speaker 3 (35:28):
So so. I mean we're on this subject of hair.
Is I know you feel this passionately about the man bun.
Is there any other hairstyle that you just cannot stand?

Speaker 2 (35:41):
Oh, let's see on a man or on a woman either, Okay.

Speaker 3 (35:50):
Because is that too politically correct? All of them.

Speaker 2 (35:56):
I know that dreadlocks are a thing, and I understand
the cultural significance of them and everything, but it is
a very difficult hairstyle to upkeep. So for me, if
if you have it like really really long, it's it's
just it just looks really bad. It's it's not well

(36:19):
kept or anything. But like I said, that's you know,
beside the point. There were some there were some hairdoos
that I had questions over. There was a time where
hairstylists would actually take a women's hair temple to temple
and run a comb all the way to the back right,

(36:39):
and that top side of that top part of the
hair was put up in a little bun while they
permed the bottom part. Yes, so the bottom part was permed,
the top part was left like it looked like a
boy eo. Okay, a boeo is a it's basically like

(37:01):
a teepee. But in Puerto Rico, the indigenous population lived
in it and they were made from the bark of
specific palm trees or whatever, and the very top looked
like that. It just this shag that fell down and
covered the permit. I never understood why that was popular. Yeah,

(37:23):
I never understood, And I had so many friends with
that same hair.

Speaker 3 (37:28):
Can I can I offer you a male perspective on that?
You know, it was really confusing about that hairstyle was
when the girls and the volleyball team and the softball
team wore because it made confusing who was gay and
who wasn't even more so.

Speaker 2 (37:45):
Yeah, that was that was weird. I just it was
every so often. I'll still see that hair doing. I
do not understand that. I don't get it, and.

Speaker 3 (37:55):
It's almost like the women's mullet and I don't.

Speaker 2 (37:59):
I don't like the trend that women have of half
curling their hair and it just looks weird to me.
And I'm like, I went to the hair salon and
I was getting a haircut and she said, do you
want me to style it? And I was like, yeah,
knock yourself whatever you want to do. If you need
to practice something, go ahead and practice it because I'm

(38:19):
just going to go home and watch all this crap off.
She's kind of laughing at me, but she was practicing
doing that and it would be like half curled and
then the rest, the bottom part is like straight. I'm like,
what are you doing And she's like, oh, this is
the latest style and I was like, yeah, about that,

(38:41):
it's not pretty and she's like, really, you don't like it,
and I was said no, and I'll be very honest
with you, I don't like it on anybody. So it's
not you know, it doesn't matter what kind of hair color, texture, whatever.
It just looks stupid to me. I just don't like it.

Speaker 3 (39:00):
But you know, I agree.

Speaker 2 (39:01):
But I told her, if you want to practice, now,
it's the time, go ahead and practice on my hair.
And so she did. And I come home and my
daughter was still here before she moved, and she looked
at me and is like, what happened to your hair?
It's like nothing, I'm just gonna go watch it. But

(39:23):
you know, all right, so.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
The stringy comb over, yeah, that one, that one hits
hard too.

Speaker 2 (39:35):
Yes, my dad was guilty. He was guilty for a
long time until my sister, who was a brave soul
and she was the one that always gave him haircuts.
So she looked at him, stare in the face and said, Dad,
we're gonna.

Speaker 3 (39:54):
Have to have a talk.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
And this was back in like I think I as
I had just graduated from college. So this is Katie
like summer of eighty nine, and he's sitting out there.
He's got the little barber thing and she's got the
wall and she's like, the comb over, it's over with.

Speaker 3 (40:16):
I unfortunately never got to meet your dad, but I'm
going to step into his shoes for a moment. He's
sitting there and she comes up to him. Dad, we
got to have a talk. And he's sitting there going, oh,
I ain't going to a damn nursing home. Because no, Dad,
it's about the comb over.

Speaker 2 (40:34):
I am very happy that my parents never had to
deal with going to a nursing home. We were blessed
in that. But you know, my dad was like it
took my sister about half an hour to convince him.
He just didn't want to let go. And you know,

(40:54):
she asked him straight off, Dad, are you balled? He
said yes, Okay, let's embrace it. She won the argument.

Speaker 3 (41:02):
There are some beautiful Captain Steubing dues we can do here.
Let's not make it weird.

Speaker 2 (41:13):
Oh man, it was. It was quite funny. It's quite funny.
So let's see what else. I guess you're up for
number four?

Speaker 3 (41:25):
You say number four?

Speaker 2 (41:29):
Number four?

Speaker 3 (41:31):
I had too much. I'm gonna ask answer m D
a little bit in the check I was out for
those two months. I spent a lot of time a
coding and I build a lot of little modules, so
and ORDI will attest to this how quick I can
do some of these HTML designs because I'll take a
module from one module from another, change coloration of bandmit's

(41:51):
out the door. It was so fun to do. And
this one, this one was really easy to put together
based on something else I've done recently. But my number
number four, and this is.

Speaker 2 (42:03):
God.

Speaker 3 (42:03):
I wish I could do a Donald Trump imitation. My
number four is make alien probing great again. There's not
enough probing stories anymore. What happened to my brethren going out?

(42:25):
I'm doing scientific research. I have a electomea dictator's little
motto here that you can put on your bumper stickers.
Reach for the stars and we might reach back Alien

(42:51):
twenty twenty eight. I'm just dying, like, like already just said.
It's true the sheer numbers of reports of actual alien
probing has gone to next to none.

Speaker 2 (43:12):
That's true. Like what do you pay attention to anymore? Like,
I don't know. Is it maybe that people are enjoying
it a lot and are deciding hmm, if I talk
about this, they'll stop.

Speaker 3 (43:27):
Yeah, you know the first thing that came to my
mind was the Glenn Glenn Beck line. I know, how,
how the hell is Jeff connecting Glenn back to alien probing?
I'm really thinking that the sick, twisted freaks are enjoying
the probing. So the aliens stop because they're like, eh,
you might catch something now, I mean, I don't, I

(43:49):
don't know. I don't get it. Why did it stop?

Speaker 2 (43:54):
I I couldn't tell you.

Speaker 3 (43:57):
I mean, if there's sixty four, if they're sixty four
gender out there, wouldn't this be the ideal time for
an alien to increase their probing. Instead they're going away.

Speaker 2 (44:10):
Well, let's face it, this whole Yeah, we've been on
a downturn society wise, and maybe they're just stepping back
and saying we cannot mess with this culture until they
straighten up. They probably don't want to catch what we've got.

Speaker 3 (44:24):
I don't know, I seriously, you know, even animal mutilations
have gone down, but the probing is the big one
for maybe, I mean, take away the one good thing
I was good at, but you know it's the two.
I just don't get why the decrease in numbers it? Yeah,

(44:46):
so my if I am reinstated because I was dictator
once in a past life. If I am reinstated as
dictator for life, what I would do is send out
a message, you know, no more golden disk, you know,
with nudes and a love track music and directions to
our house. I'm going to just send one out there
that says, gentlemen, start your engines and don't know what

(45:11):
it means.

Speaker 2 (45:17):
Oh goodness. I just.

Speaker 3 (45:22):
People knew what they were signing up or when they
saw that I was coming on this show.

Speaker 2 (45:27):
Yeah, you're you're not wrong, y'all. He only told me
a couple of the things. Okay, So I am going
to be absolved of all responsibility for his list as
he is absolved of mine. But I will say this,

(45:48):
the way things are looking, mine's pretty tame.

Speaker 3 (45:51):
You'll agree with number one. You, I will wholeheartedly have
your support for number one. So you have nothing to fear, well,
you have everything to fear until we get the number one.
Till number one will be fine. Yeah, so you're my
number four, number four.

Speaker 2 (46:10):
Absolutely, when people are traveling by air or by steam
or by you know, rail or whatever, you will not
wear flip flops or crop tops. You will wear instead

(46:31):
good shoes for travel, and you will cover up that
mid section that looks like a muffin top. I cannot
stand to see people in flip flops at the airport
when they're traveling. You know why, you know, you know
what really disgusted me about it is that invariably, not all,

(46:54):
but a lot of them will take off their flip
flops and put their feet up on the r i'm
rest of the seat in front of them. And I'm like,
that happened. That happened to me at least four times
in the past seven years of traveling by air and

(47:14):
I'm just like, I cannot, I cannot. And then to
see women just wearing the weirdest clothing. I mean, I'm
I admit I when I travel, I dress very nicely
because that's an artifact from my mom. She taught me
that when we when we were young, when we traveled,

(47:35):
she dressed us all up. She was dressed to the nines,
and that's how we you know, we traveled back and
forth from Puerto Rico. But nowadays, it's just like, I
get that you need to be comfortable. This is why
I didn't say anything about yoga pants, because I know
that a lot of women find that very comfortable, and
I know that a lot of women, a lot of
men find it attractive. So I just, yeah, Okay, you

(47:58):
can have your yoga pants, but no flops. You need
to have tennis shoes. You need to have some kind
of comfortable slip on shoes, something something nice. Just it
just drives me crazy, I know, and I'm probably in
the minority, but believe me when I tell you, I'm
just saving you.

Speaker 3 (48:18):
Because I mean, if, yeah, if you're going to wear
crocs onto an airplane, it better have at least four
pieces of flair.

Speaker 2 (48:29):
Yeah, that exactly. Yeah, you do need you need flair,
you need flare on those. And you know, I'll be honest,
there are some crocks out there that are like you know,
they have the little strap and everything, and there's some
that are like clow that are more slip on rather
than clog style. And then you have I loved one
of my favorite nurses when when I would go to Bamsea,

(48:53):
she had the cutest clogs that were pink. She worked
in the pediatrics. They were pink and they had all
sorts of little medical flare on them, but they also
had but she would alternate them with cartoon characters, you know,
depending on you know, stuff like that, and and so

(49:14):
you know, to keep the kids happy. And I always
thought that that was really cool. And I've seen some
that the flare is like really flourish, like like they
have like they look like diamonds, you know, the jewel
tone things you know, all over it. And really playing
one of the guys in the Oar one of the docks,
his crocs actually had they were I guess camel colored,

(49:42):
cameo colored, so all of his things were like military.
His flare was military, and but it wasn't the flare
that you think. These were like things that you would
pin on a on a uniform. So some of his
rang was on his cross. It's really cool. And I

(50:04):
was like, that has to be uncomfortable slipping into that
because you know the backing and everything. But no, he
managed to actually cut it back and put something. He
used a different type of backing for the pins, so
it looked really cool and everything. But yeah, I could
make an exception for the crocs. If you have appropriate flare,

(50:27):
it's gotta.

Speaker 3 (50:27):
Have flare, absolutely, I mean that's dressing it up. It's
like cup links on a nice shirt shirt and suit.
So I mean, yeah, I can, I can respect. I can.
You know what. I look at pictures of old time
flying and there's so much respect amongst everyone on the plane.

(50:49):
You know, not to mention you could light up a
cigarette there, even though I don't smoke. That's just kind
of freaking awesome. It was treated with reverie. We're flying,
humans are flying. Do you understand this? We were not
meant to and here we are. So yeah, I you

(51:11):
have my support as Empress of Earth.

Speaker 2 (51:16):
Oh, thank you, Exalted One, oh God. All right, So
moving on to middle test. There is there a three, Yes,
there is.

Speaker 3 (51:34):
You d'arn know well right, I got that all planned out.
So number three now, as dictator of the Cosmos, screw you,
Neil de grasse Tyson, I'm claiming that one. If I
allow anyone to take office, my number three decree is

(52:00):
all politicians must compete in a game of my choice. Now.
The slogan is democracy is out, dodgeball is in. Now, sit,
stay stay with me on this. Okay, we could have

(52:22):
a Jerry Nadler versus Chris Christy pie eating contest to
see who wins a seak.

Speaker 2 (52:31):
Oh, I don't know how that would go I mean.

Speaker 3 (52:33):
Right, the odds on an early fifty five percent favor
would probably go to Christy because he's a little taller.
But there's something not human about Nadler, So I can
see Nadler pulling ahead. But if that's not enough for you,
how about we strapped down Nancy Pelosi and Mitch McConnell

(52:54):
to see who can tell the most truth and if
it first, one to two wins. Okay, if that's if
that's not good enough, how about miss Bobbitt versus AOC
in a jello wrestling match. They see, I have ideas, people.

Speaker 2 (53:17):
You do you have ideas? I'll give you that.

Speaker 3 (53:21):
I'm not seeing a loss of loss here. I'm seeing
nothing but win, win, When once again I asked for
your support and hope cheating to get me as dictator
of the Cosmos for twenty twenty eight. No, I this

(53:43):
is this is when I categorized what we were talking before,
show that this is a half truth and half funny,
because at least in competition like this you would actually
see a politician maybe possibly show some worth. I mean,

(54:04):
can you imagine you know yet forty you know, say
the Senate is tied fifty to fifty instead of having
JD Vance decide. Okay, fifty senators on the left side,
fifty on the right. Tuggle war this bitch Winter wins.

(54:24):
Pay per view it four ninety nine guarantee at least
two hours of entertainment, so you might have to do
some you know that jello wrestling thing from the House
of Representatives. You could pay down the debt in two
and a half years. I'm not seeing an issue with

(54:45):
anything I'm bringing to this table.

Speaker 2 (54:47):
No, I know, I'm I'm there. I'm ualizing it. I
am wholeheartedly for this plan.

Speaker 3 (54:58):
And ironically this is the s or just one of
my explanations because it makes so much logical sense right already, Thunderdome,
any any politician over the age of seventy two people
win one people out. If you can win a Thunderdome

(55:20):
over the age of seventy, guess what you get to
keep your seat for two years until the next time
are due. I am an ideas.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
Man, Okay, I can totally see it. I can I
can see it. Yeah, I just think it's kind of
it has to be pay per viewed so that we
can generate some mi. Nay, absolutely, the government or for

(55:52):
our podcasts. We're dictators.

Speaker 3 (55:55):
You know. I will cancel all of my Sunday Night
post for this to happen for an hour on every
Sunday night. That's how serious I am about this one,
even though I find it absolutely hilarious. Yeah, I'm down,

(56:16):
you know, not Greta's unburned down, but you know down down. Wow. Okay,
I am influence of Mountain Dew and Long Islands.

Speaker 2 (56:30):
Uh yeah, apparently, I'm not gonna say it's the bad influence.
I'm just gonna say it's an influence. Okay, So we
have to your by number three. Okay, my number three.
I know everybody is going to agree with this. Nobody's
going to fight me on it. No one is going

(56:53):
to fight me on it. I don't want any Christmas
before Black Friday, and I don't want anyhow week before
October first. That shit has got to stop. I don't
care who decides spooky season is after her birthday. I'm
looking at you, Laura. I just need space. We get

(57:15):
Christmas in July. And to give you an example, Hallmark
and now Great American Family, they're both doing the same thing.
They have a full month of Christmas movies in July.
Then they started Christmas movies in October. At first it
was they started it on mid November, and then it

(57:39):
was the first of November, and then they moved it
down to October fifteen, and now its October first that
they start Christmas movies. And the Christmas movies, y'all, they
don't end on December twenty fifth, No, they keep going
into January. So you're getting four months of Christmas movies.

Speaker 3 (58:00):
Technically longer than my second marriage. So ew.

Speaker 2 (58:04):
So I love Christmas movies, I love Hallmark, I love
Great American Family. I dig all that stuff. But no,
I need space. I don't want us have Christmas movies
in the month of October. And I understand that some
people don't celebrate Halloween, and I respect that with every
fiber of my being. But there are people who do

(58:26):
celebrate Halloween and they need their month. That's their month.
October is their month, Okay, So we need to stop that.
I need Christmas to go back to Black Friday and
it can go on through January the way it's supposed to,
because you know, the first day of Christmas is actually
technically on the twenty fifth of December. So you know,

(58:50):
it should it should go into a little bit into January.
I'll give it time. And of course there are some
of us that put fifty five hundred Christmas trees in
their house, so they need time to take it all down.

Speaker 3 (59:00):
So you can kill it personal, Eggy, it's.

Speaker 2 (59:04):
Very personal, and it's only me. Nobody else helps me
with us stuff, so you know, so like, and I'm
sure Danielle feels the same way, because Danielle's is a
Christmas Her house is a Christmas wonderland. I mean, it
is gorgeous the way this woman decorates her house, but
she's going to need time to take it all down.
So yeah, give us some leeway into January. I understand

(59:26):
going into January. I don't understand starting And I'm afraid
that they're going to start in September soon. Yeah, and
pretty soon half of the year you will be inundated
with Christmas and Christmas movies and Christmas things to do
and baking, you know, And I'm like, no, that wasn't
the intent of Christmas at all. And we need to

(59:47):
get back to the to the original schedule of sanity
when it came to our holidays. It's gotten so out
of hand. So yeah, that's that's my number three. And
you know what, I would die on that one. I
would die that one because I'm adamant about it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:08):
I totally respect where you're coming from. I agree with
you ninety five percent of the way. And as Empress
of Earth who is allowed to have their lovely husband
at their side, and me as the dictator of the universe,
screw you in DT. I would request one one simple

(01:00:36):
little thing about Halloween as I live in Vermont. For me,
it starts September twenty first, the day fall hits because
pumpkin milk season up here. Bucks. But for some reason,

(01:00:57):
we do get the goth button fish nets during Halloween.
So the longer I can have that time period, the
happier I am, which is.

Speaker 2 (01:01:05):
I'm giving you a whole month. I don't understand.

Speaker 3 (01:01:08):
I just need. I just need.

Speaker 2 (01:01:09):
Honestly, did the goth baits and fishnets think that's kind
of a year round thing, isn't it?

Speaker 3 (01:01:16):
Well? Yes, but at Halloween it comes out even more, which,
like I said, you as empress with your husband, I
get it. You can have free reign of this. But
in the outside of the Earth.

Speaker 2 (01:01:26):
Okay, I'll give it to you with the proviso that
no woman dresses like Han Solo during October and they
don't appear in Spice season.

Speaker 3 (01:01:36):
I have to live through Alrea these tweets. During fall season,
I get nothing but old women and Asians, which not
necessarily a bad thing. But yeah, I don't get that,
but it does lead me to my number two. Okay,
number two, this Dictator of the Universe. I will require

(01:02:07):
all former prime Ministers of Finland named Santamaron to go
on a date with me. Now my tagline to help
you can convince the voters. One small step for Finland,

(01:02:27):
one giant leap for my ass. Okay, help me become
dictator of the universe in twenty twenty eight. I am
a simple alien with a simple plan, and we can
make this happen.

Speaker 2 (01:02:43):
Santa Barron, Okay, I'll, I'll get on the phone.

Speaker 3 (01:02:50):
That's I mean. Look, I'm I don't I don't have
a missus Alien. I need a missen and as Finland
apparently isn't real, isn't she the most prime candidate to
be missus Aalien? Because I'm always left with the eternal

(01:03:12):
I've done the stupid thing once and married an American finish.
I want to marry a finish finish this time. What
part of my son is more real, the alien side
or the finish side. I'm willing for the betterment of
the planet to enhance with another creation of an alien

(01:03:34):
Finnish hybrid that will take over the Earth when I'm gone.
Don't ask what you can do for you, ask what
you can do for me. Okay, I'm done. Don't kid it.

(01:04:08):
I tried to make it heartfelt.

Speaker 2 (01:04:12):
Mm hmm sure, sure, yeah, okay, Well I.

Speaker 3 (01:04:18):
Think I think the Long Island's winning now.

Speaker 2 (01:04:21):
Oh it won a long time ago. So okay, so
where are we at.

Speaker 3 (01:04:27):
You're at your.

Speaker 2 (01:04:29):
Number two, my number two, my number two, harkening back
to your number five. I'm gonna have to add this
one to it. This was my number two. That's stupid
designator hit or rule. That's gotta go. I mean, that's
gotta go everywhere. I don't care if they're playing in

(01:04:52):
Uganda with the designator hitter rule. That's got to go
there too. I don't care if Sri Lanka has enshrined
it in its constant it's got to go. I don't
like it. I've never liked that I'm not even that
big of a baseball person, and honestly, some of the
rules for baseball kind of like go over my head.
I enjoy watching it. I love watching a game of baseball,

(01:05:14):
especially a live one. It's great. But I've never understood
that stupid rule, and it's got to go it has it? Has?
It's been under my skin since this inception years ago. Obviously, yes,
and it's ever I don't think it's ever been a
good rule. I don't understand why it's still fair. Why

(01:05:38):
haven't people gotten rid of it. I don't get it
to go.

Speaker 3 (01:05:42):
Go back to my number five, in particular about the
wussification of sports. When pictures had to hit, It's amazing
how much better their control was. I don't care about velocity.
Oh he's throwing one hundred and one. Now, of course
he's not going to have control. I bet you his
ass would have control if he had to hit.

Speaker 1 (01:06:06):
You.

Speaker 3 (01:06:06):
You have my one hundred and ten percent support on
this one.

Speaker 2 (01:06:11):
I just I've never understood it, and I still don't
understand it. And I have people that tell me, oh,
you just don't get it. I'm like, exactly, this is
the point I'm trying to make I don't get it.
It makes absolutely no sense to me.

Speaker 3 (01:06:27):
He's good enough to throw and what's crazy? And I've
had this conversation with Mark Goobazow a few times and
he mentions it all the time on the Angels broadcast,
and he's not wrong. Typically, pictures are the best athletes
on the team. If they spent twice the amount they

(01:06:54):
used to learn practicing hitting as they do about everything else,
they would be okay. I mean, you have pictures like
Greg Maddox, who and two two separate years, had a
higher batting average than what he gave up. If Greg
freaking Maddox, who is not necessarily the most athletic looking pitcher,

(01:07:18):
though he is in my top four of all time,
can hit for a higher batting average, then he gives up,
then everyone can hit.

Speaker 2 (01:07:33):
I just hate that, thanks so much. I cannot possibly
tell you.

Speaker 3 (01:07:37):
No, I I this yeah, this one okay, God, I
almost shoose a bad baseball pun bad me, bad me.
This one is great, this one I I hole. Yeah,
cannot even tell you. And then they're like, you know,
bananna ball, which I do love, which is not baseball.

(01:07:59):
It's banana ball. People were It's like oh, we should
bring the golden hitter in from banana ball to baseball. Well,
when you get rid of the DH, you have the
goldenhead and hitter usually twice in a game, because after
the picture gets yanked in the sixth, the pitcher spot
comes up twice and you have to pinch hit for
the crappy reliever who's coming in who can't hit, So
you get two golden batters in the game. Shut up.

Speaker 2 (01:08:22):
It's amazing nobody's actually gotten to that point right, that
they've not arrived at that logical conclusion. But mm hmm whatever,
I don't whatever anyway, that's it's gotta.

Speaker 3 (01:08:38):
Go wholeheartedly agree, whole heartedly agree.

Speaker 2 (01:08:45):
Oh, okay, so I guess it's your turn for the
last one, number one in our parts.

Speaker 3 (01:08:53):
I'm not gonna do number one yet. I'm gonna tease
you for a second. Ohness, because I sat down with
the executive producer to discuss what I should do. Wow, Like,
I knew number one and number two without a question,
but there are three four and five I was questioning,

(01:09:15):
and I think we came up with a good three
four and five. But I do have a few honorable
mentions that I won't go in to do real detail too.
I have a couple honorable mention. The fat electrician history
class is mandated for middle schoolers. I don't care if
he's not accurate one hundred percent. He's accurate more than

(01:09:37):
most history teachers in middle school, so they'll take that.
Second honorable mention. I will buy law decree that one
of the prime channels instead of ABCCBSNBC, and even Fox
will air nothing but twenty four hours of South Korean's camping.

Speaker 2 (01:10:01):
Camping.

Speaker 3 (01:10:03):
Oh yeah, already knows what I'm talking about on this one, Okay,
I have already's votes.

Speaker 2 (01:10:10):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:10:12):
Number three of the honorable mentions, this is the one
that I really don't have a joke for, so that's
why I got emitted. Ethanol can go fuck itself. Oh yeah, okay,
And speaking of hey Bob, go fuck yourself. My honorable
mention number four is Disney is declared the loser of

(01:10:35):
Monopoly game and it has to leave the board in
the room and everything behind. That one almost made number five.

Speaker 2 (01:10:52):
But okay, but.

Speaker 3 (01:10:56):
We have number one now. As Ireland seems to be
falling by the wayside, I just can't ask for American votes.
I have to ask for everyone's vote on Earth to
be Dictator of the universe. So by law, I will

(01:11:17):
decree the following every evening at six pm, whatever time
you're in. So if you're at six pm East coast,
you wait until six pm West coast. All citizens must
raise a glass a beer or whiskey in honor of

(01:11:40):
their life. That they're they're alive, that they're having fun,
that they're a moment of joyous attendance is mandatory. Hangovers
are optional. Now by this decree, it is to realize
that human life. Life is precious. Yes, even the ones

(01:12:03):
that get on a boat and turn around two minutes
later looking at you, Greta. Every life is precious, not
the ones that gets sent into a used sock. But
you know what I mean. Really, so let's take an
hour or universal beer and whiskey hour to celebrate among

(01:12:26):
our friends are soon to be friends, and even our enemies,
by raising that fine glass of alcohol, whatever ABV you wish,
give a cheer, and then go on with your business.
I'm asking for your vote. Twenty twenty eight, Dictator of
the Universe.

Speaker 2 (01:12:52):
Very excellent, very excellent. Over why I do have some
honorable mentions as well. These are more vanity projects than anything,
and this degree some people would agree with it, and
some people are already there. But yeah, gray hair totally
sexy on women. Men already cornered that market. So I

(01:13:13):
don't even want to hear from y'all.

Speaker 3 (01:13:15):
Yeah we did.

Speaker 2 (01:13:17):
I'm talking about women a lot. For some weird reason,
I do not understand a lot of women are very
reluctant to let their gray hair grow out. They prefer.

Speaker 3 (01:13:29):
And just go Adrian Curry, I'm looking at you in
this regard because that gray is a hot.

Speaker 2 (01:13:37):
I just you know it, just did I. But you know,
everybody's level of vanity is different. But yes, I would
decree that gray hair is very sexy. I would decree
that wrinkles, laugh, wrinkles are extremely sexy, and nobody should
ever do any kind of surgery to remove them or

(01:14:00):
plump them up. That's just wrong. That goes out another
thing that I would degree. No more lip fillers, people.
You have plenty of foul out there with ducklips. We
don't need more. I'm good.

Speaker 3 (01:14:15):
Can I please interject for a moment on this one?
Why is it the people so many that get the
lip fillers? Will warn you about microplastics in their water bottles.

Speaker 2 (01:14:29):
Oh yeah, it's always the same people, isn't it. I
don't understand that at all, but I understand that plastic
surgery is available for enhancement and for help in reconstruction.
One of a very good friend of mine just now
has his own private practice. He was a plastic surgeron

(01:14:51):
in the military for a very long time, and now
that he's retired, he has a private practice and I
follow him so I can learn about the procedures that
are done to help women, not from a vanity point

(01:15:11):
of view, but because they're having reconstruction then, or they
have lost so much weight that they have, you know,
very flabby skin that needs to be removed. And he
walks through the process of how that is done, and
it makes other women comfortable enough to reach out and
ask about having that done because it is I don't

(01:15:34):
know about a lot of people, but I had a
friend that had lost a lot of weight and her
skin was very loose, and it was very uncomfortable for
her because she could even though she had lost a
lot of weight, she still couldn't dress nicely. She couldn't
dress in the size that she was because of the

(01:15:54):
skin and all that stuff, and it took her a
long time to actually come to the decision of going
to a plastic surgeon because she always envisioned plastic surgery
as something for your enhancement.

Speaker 3 (01:16:08):
Like, yeah, there was that one Twitter account. God, I
can't remember her name, really pretty black hair, blue eyes,
lost a lot of weight and had the surgery for
that that was Watching that transformation was incredible. That's good surgery.

Speaker 2 (01:16:24):
Yeah, and so I totally agree that plastic surgery is
something that can be considered necessary. It can be considered
a boon. I cannot tell you the amount of times
where it was actually prescribed for depression. And I was
blown away because it actually helped women who were depressed

(01:16:47):
about their the state of their bodies. And it wasn't
like they were getting big things done. It was just
one tiny little thing, you know. And and would tell
me stories about some of his patients. He never broke
confidentiality rules, don't get me wrong, but he would tell
me how it would help them. And it was funny

(01:17:11):
because right before we were moving, he said, if you
need anything done, now's the time, because I have to
get back into practice. Because he had been the commander
of the hospital, so he was not technically being a
plastic surgeon, so to keep up his credentials and everything,
he had to get back into plastic surgery. So he
was looking for people to play on. I guess, and

(01:17:34):
I came close, y'all to getting a tummy tuck and
he looked at me and he's like, yeah, no, you're fine.
I was like, fine, okay, whatever.

Speaker 3 (01:17:43):
I can a compliment, how dare you?

Speaker 2 (01:17:47):
So I was very happy to have a plastic surgeon
look at me and say, yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:17:52):
No, that would be awesome. But oh yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:17:58):
And Daniel makes a good point. Talk does help with
people who suffer from extreme pain from migrains, and it
gives them a certain benefit with the lines and all
that stuff. But I've never held with the usage of
book toks to completely relax your facial muscles so that
there's no expression so that you don't get wrinkles. I

(01:18:20):
do not understand that. And admittedly I'm almost I'll be
sixty in a year and a half or so, but
I'm still fighting the wrinkles. But I'm doing topically, you know,
and that makes me feel good. Doing the whole facial
cream and moisturizer and the ice cream and all that
stuff and that that perks me up. So but yes,

(01:18:43):
there are some things that I would actually dictate. Gray hair,
sexy on women. Laugh lines are great, you know that
kind of stuff, you know, normalizing aging, I should.

Speaker 3 (01:18:55):
Say so, yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 2 (01:18:58):
But so anyway, my number one. I'm gonna get some blowback.
I'm gonna get some blowback on this one. And y'all,
I this was just for fun. Some of the things
that were serious that I threw in there, like the
whole Christmas thing, but this one's just for fun. But
it is my number one. Pineapple goes on pizza. End

(01:19:21):
of discussion. I've decreted, it's over done. Pineapple goes on pizza.
I don't even eat pizza all that often, but whenever
I you know, ham and pineapple pizza always. I always
thought that that was such a great combination, and I
never understood why people like hate it. Now the other

(01:19:43):
day I saw somebody putting banana slices on a pizza,
and I was like, what in the actual living hell
bananas do not go with pepperoni. People, There's a certain
you know, ham and pineapple actually do go together. But
bananas and pepperoni do not. So if you want to

(01:20:05):
go for a sweet and savory combo, might I suggest
parent prescudo or fig in prescudo vinegar. Those are fantastic
pizzas if you want to go into that. But pineapple
does on pizza, and.

Speaker 3 (01:20:22):
I, believe it or not, I am going to agree
with you because I hate I hate pineapple. But you
know what I hate more than pineapple and pizza. People

(01:20:44):
who feel the need to be obligated to comment on
a food or drink post. And I'm sorry already, I'm
gonna borrow you because I think this is pertinent the
number of times lady will post how delicious peanut butter

(01:21:05):
is on a cheeseburger, and it is how many people
feel the need to comment. Oh you're fucking stupid. Oh
what do you mean? How dare you? No way that's
any good? Okay, you may not like it, Guess what
other people do. Guess what. I may like IPA's in

(01:21:27):
the summer but drink stouts in the winter. Guess what
Everyone's food taste is different. You don't need to be
high almighty. You're not the dictator to life. You're not
the Empress of Earth. Your opinion means jack shit. You
don't need to spew it like you're spreading shit on

(01:21:48):
a farm. You know what, if you feel the need
to respond to orty, how can you have peanut butter
and a cheeseburger? Just go huh not in my taste
house taste taste, you know, wheelhouse of taste. But good
on you, God, I hate that crap. You know what, Okay,

(01:22:12):
it's not your your your taste. You don't like it.
You don't think you'd ever imagine eating that. Guess what?
I dip chocolate chip cookies in the chicken gravy when
I'm not drunk, and it's freaking delicious. And it's far

(01:22:32):
more deliciousespecially when it's homemade chicken. Now, no, don't get
me wrong, bagged chocolate chip cookies and jarred chicken gravy
you never match up. But real chicken gravy and homemade
chocolate chip cookies. Guess what My alien taste buds find

(01:22:52):
that decent, I'm going to eat it. So I wheartily
agree with the Empress of Earth here that if you
like pineapples on a pizza, guess what, eat it? Order it?
Eat it on a picture on Twitter in front of
friends with the middle fingers extended because you know what,
you're enjoying your life. Did I back you up well

(01:23:18):
enough on that one? Yeah?

Speaker 2 (01:23:19):
Yeah, I think you did. I'm like, I'm here going Damn.
I thought I was passionate about this, but okay, no, this.

Speaker 3 (01:23:28):
Is this has become a passion project as a former brewer.
When I you know, everyone's like, oh, IPA's tastes like shit.
A the ip as you've had, I've tasted like shit.
B tell me what you like, what do you eat?

(01:23:49):
And I will match an ipa. Believe it or not.
That will match your taste buds and you will like it.
But it's not the traditional ip that you think of
when you initially think ipa. Like I told Orty, and
I think might have been just at one point because

(01:24:09):
she loves tacos in Mexican food, the best ipa to
have with tacos is a sour ipa because it matches
the flavors of the tacos, especially authentic, you know, the
good ones, and the sourness of the ipa really plays
onto that well. And you have hops that have different flavors.

(01:24:31):
So if you're you know, you can have citrus hops
like my favorite hop to use as a lemon drop
that gives a lemon ball flavor. People will drink lemon
ball drinks with tacos all freaking day long. I gotta
make a beer that tastes like lemon ball. That's an IPA.
So don't tell me you don't like I PAS. You
just don't like the ones you've tried thus far, And

(01:24:54):
that's okay. That's the part of experiencing life. Experiencing you
do and don't like. I'd rather you tell me, Oh,
you know what, I made that peanut butter cheese burdy,
Like Brad said, it was okay, not life changing, and
you know, may not order it again, but he at
least tried it and gave an opinion. Okay, I can

(01:25:16):
respect that, But the ones that go, what are you
talking about? Try it. If you don't like it, you
don't like it. So you have my full hearted support
for Empress of Earth.

Speaker 2 (01:25:36):
That's pretty funny. But I mean, these are just a
few fun things. I'm sure that I could think of
other things and always great. You know, as Peter says,
what grinds my gears? You know that kind of thing?

Speaker 3 (01:25:53):
Yes, but yes, but this was just for fun.

Speaker 2 (01:25:57):
I honestly, I don't think I could be a good leader.
I've never felt comfortable in that role, so I've always
had Riker's role in everything. Yeah, I was very comfortable
as Riker. I'm more than happy to be Riker at

(01:26:18):
this age of my At this stage of my life,
I'm actually starting to feel the beard of Riker.

Speaker 3 (01:26:23):
So.

Speaker 2 (01:26:26):
You know, I'm feeling that she's quite well. But I just,
for some reason, the thought of being the leader of
anything has always struck me as being a role I
could not play very well. I've been placed in that
role and people have never complained about it. I've actually gotten,

(01:26:49):
you know, several people to say, you know, you did
a great job, and I've gotten raises out of it,
you know, for whatever reason. But I never if i't
comfortable in that role because us I just it's just
telling people what to do, you know, or telling them
this is this way or the highway kind of thing.
For me when I was younger, I just couldn't do that.

(01:27:10):
Now in my you know, at my age, I'm pretty comfortable.
I can tell them what to do. Yeah, I don't.

Speaker 3 (01:27:23):
Buy sometimes the wording out of my mouth is not
so great.

Speaker 2 (01:27:27):
So yeah, yeah, so, but you know, for the most part,
I try not to. I try to actually be a
little nicer than most people. You know. Some people say
those people don't deserve you to be nice, and I'm like,
you have to be nice to everybody, because that's my
last my last degree, and this decree goes for everybody.

(01:27:52):
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Yeah,
And I don't mean if you have a think for that,
I don't want to hear it. I'm trying to be
nice here.

Speaker 3 (01:28:06):
God, I feel attacked all of a sudden. Now, I
I agree. I love being a leader, but you know
what I love doing more is making those around me better.
And I don't need the limelight. I don't need you know,
like I what can I do to make you successful?

(01:28:30):
What can I make you to do? Be a better
person that you want to be? And I will do
everything in my power to make that happen. Sometimes that
means I have to lead, put a leash on you
and lead you. Other times it just means, you know,
maybe maybe smacking that proverbial ass a little bit to
spur you forward. And I think that's what it comes

(01:28:52):
down to, back to the back to the original part
of the show is leading. You know, you don't have
to be addicted to lead, even though you'll be accused
of it from time to time. It's how do you
make those in all these situations better? And there's going
to be some losses along the way, but there's as

(01:29:12):
long as you're trying to make people better and leading
them when you can, everything's just going to be better
in general. And I don't understand the reluctance of people
being hesitant to it.

Speaker 2 (01:29:30):
And I guess with that we should wrap up this
show because it's straight up nine o'clock.

Speaker 3 (01:29:35):
Yeah we almost did that perfect, didn't we.

Speaker 2 (01:29:37):
Yeah, we did.

Speaker 3 (01:29:41):
I should be a producer or something.

Speaker 2 (01:29:43):
I know. I know it's a gift. You have a gift. Anyway, Well,
thank you so much for joining me tonight.

Speaker 3 (01:29:56):
And oh it was fun. Thank you, it was a
lot of fun.

Speaker 2 (01:30:00):
Let us know where can we find you?

Speaker 3 (01:30:03):
Let's see you can find me on Twitter slash x
at a cosmic Bard Sunday, because apparently this week is
nothing but me on the network Sunday at six pm.
I believe I will be on the Vincent Charles Project
I think we have a subject, but I don't know
if it's been confirmed one hundred percent. And then that

(01:30:23):
same night at eight pm, hopefully after Korn's Reading Room,
I will be back doing the Lost Wonder Space and
Science podcast. Then next Thursday, possibly at nine point thirty,
a brand new show called The Bard's Forge, where you
might be surprised what that show is about. I'm not

(01:30:44):
gonna give it away yet, and then.

Speaker 2 (01:30:46):
Back again surprised, I will say that.

Speaker 3 (01:30:48):
So next yeah, Next next Sunday will be in the
Crease episode episode seventy. I think we're doing Project Serpo,
so that'll be It'll be awesome, So definitely tune in.
Check out the new Kalaorn schedule over at the kal
Klurn Radio dot com. And that's about it. Aggie, what

(01:31:11):
about yourself?

Speaker 2 (01:31:13):
You can find me at Aggie Weeken and Aggie the Barkeep.
Those are over on x You can find me eight
thirty pm Eastern on Tuesday nights where Jeff is producing
the Cocktail Lounge that I co host with the Everswap
Brass Lagger, and eight thirty pm Eastern Friday nights right
here doing he said, She said, usually with the aforementioned

(01:31:35):
rowdy Rick, I think next week, but slacker next week.
It's the second Wednesday of the month, so at eight
pm the guys will get together for Toxic Masculinity. I'll
be drinking. I'll be drinking, but maybe maybe not. I'll

(01:31:56):
be bringing in the drink of the evening. And let's
see last but not least. Gee, Jeff, what can that be?

Speaker 3 (01:32:04):
Oh? Yeah, yeah, that show that we're going to do
the first Monday of October. But we don't have a
book yet because the aforementioned Rick has sided on topic
for ju October yet. Intent Rick, well.

Speaker 2 (01:32:20):
When he gets around, we'll figure it out.

Speaker 3 (01:32:22):
We'll figure it out.

Speaker 2 (01:32:22):
But yes, the first Monday in October, eight thirty pm
Eastern as well, we host spirited books and so we
should hopefully, hopefully you'll let us know this week.

Speaker 3 (01:32:35):
Yeah, hopefully hopefully and true honest opinion, hopefully Rick is
feeling good enough tomorrow to do juxtposition, because I have
a feeling we might hear about what might be planned,
and that'll be awesome and we can the whole network
if you got it.

Speaker 2 (01:32:49):
I've been invited to be on Ducks tomorrow night, so
I'll be.

Speaker 3 (01:32:52):
There awesome force the issue. As as program director of
kaylor and Radio, I'm asking you to force the issue
a little bit the same with you already know you are,
but if you had our new teklaor and Radio. Every
October we really try to do something special for you
guys and try to do a theme and and seeing

(01:33:12):
how the other host and other shows come with ideas
that could correlate to the main subject of Juxtober is
amazing to witness and it makes me a fan of
the network more than anything else. So please keep tuning in.
We'll give you updates as we can.

Speaker 2 (01:33:33):
I'm so excited me too.

Speaker 3 (01:33:37):
That's more coding I get to do.

Speaker 2 (01:33:39):
Yep, yep, more coding. So anyway, thank you guys for
joining us this evening, and we hope you had a
lot of fun and we will get you on the
next episode of he said, She said, but I go
back to.

Speaker 4 (01:33:53):
Normal welcotal, there's no sun.

Speaker 3 (01:34:37):
Whoa, he said. We will
Advertise With Us

Popular Podcasts

My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark

My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark

My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.

24/7 News: The Latest

24/7 News: The Latest

The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.

Dateline NBC

Dateline NBC

Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com

Music, radio and podcasts, all free. Listen online or download the iHeart App.

Connect

© 2025 iHeartMedia, Inc.