October 20, 2025 • 17 mins
Knowing about something or someone is not the same as accepting them. Join Cindy and Alison as they discuss the distinction between having knowledge about a topic and demonstrating acceptance of it.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to how Preschool Teachers do It.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I'm Cindy, I'm Alison, and we have a combined fifty
five years of experience working with children, families, and experts
in early education.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
We are not random influence. No, we are not.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Whether you are new or have been our podcast peeps
since twenty eighteen, we are thrilled you found us.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Alison is scratching her eye right now.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Preschool peeps, if you're not on, if you're not on YouTube,
you don't see that. But that's why she's laughing, because
I hit the record thing and she was like, oh,
hold on, nope, nope, we're on.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
So welcome, pre school peeps. We are very human podcast.
Is your eye Okay, yeah, it just got a little
itchy there. Oh I'm sorry to hear that. Okay, Okay,
folks really looking at everybody now, Okay, you're all right.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Okay, she needs to get the eye in good shape
because we have places to shout out and you have to.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Listen to them with my eye.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
All right. We are shouting out today the people of Madrid, Spain, So.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Hello, everybody.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I feel like we have shouted out Madrid in the past.
That might be true, and so thank you for still
listening or bringing more people or being one of the
newer listeners in Madrid.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
And we are also shouting out Oklahoma. We shouted out Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
I don't think we have I think the last episode
we had somebody we'd never shouted out before, then today
and next week, so listen for that. These are people
we are not, at least in the United States. People
we have not shouted out before.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
So that's cool. That is cool.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
We're spreading in the United States, which is great. So
thank you for being with us, people in Madrid, people
in Oklahoma, people wherever you are. When there used to
be a children's show on when I was young, I'm
about to date myself called Romper Room and she had
a magic mirror and she would call children's name. She
would be like, let's see who I see in my
magic mirror, and she would say like, I see Alison today,
(02:02):
I see Cindy today, and she would give the generic
I see all of my friends today. That's how I
feel about Thank you all for being preschool peeps and
for and for coming back because you know, we know
you have lots of choices about what you're gonna listen to.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
And what you're gonna do. So thank you for coming
back or for finding us, which is great.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
And for those of you who may have found us
on this episode and you're thinking by the end of
it you're thinking, I want to listen to more episodes.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Just no, binging us is actually a thing. It is
a thing.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
You can binge all what three and fifty something episodes?
People have done it.
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Yeah, people do it, and they tell us and then
they tell us and they write us. Are like, Hi,
I'm listening to episode forty five and I was just wondering.
I'm like, whoa forty five It's like a good six
years ago. I gotta go back and see what that
was about. But like, I love that people do that.
I do too, And you know, thanks to all of you. Yeah,
we are in fact still doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
We are binge able, and we have received acknowledgment as
one of the top preschool podcass so we very much
appreciate that. Uh and maybe that's what makes us so
bingeable that we are one of the top preschool podcasts.
Speaker 3 (03:07):
But thank you, thank you all. I think we're just relatable.
There you go. We're real people. We are We're real people.
Who are here today to make a real different distinction.
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Thank you, my gosh, I don't know what just happened
there happened, Yeah, make a real distinction between two things
that sometimes I think get a little muddy.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Okay, right, yeah, And it's.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
The two words that you saw in the title of
this episode, the difference between having knowledge and and the
difference between demonstrating how about that, demonstrating knowledge and demonstrating acceptance, Because,
for example, I can intentionally learn about someone's culture, yes,
(03:55):
and I can demonstrate that knowledge if you were to
ask me about it, right, I've learned about it and
I can spit some facts back at you, right, But
that doesn't mean that I have demonstrated my acceptance.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Of the diversity.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
True.
Speaker 5 (04:09):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
There's a difference between when people say like, oh, oh, yeah,
I read a lot about that sort of person, and
I know a lot about that sort of person, or
I majored in that in college and so I took
a lot of classes having to do with but then
demonstrating acceptance is very different.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
And what the way that we came.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Across the notion of this was I think it was
a real on social media where an adult who is
on the spectrum of autism. Was talking about things like,
you might know a lot about how it is or
what it.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Is to be on the spectrum of autism. You might
have a lot of knowledge.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
But she was like, you know, that doesn't mean that
you accept me for who I am and all the
things that come with it. And I think that's true
for so many of us, even you know not only
something like being on the spectrum of autism, but also
things like you know culture, like I've learned a lot
about it. I think I understand a lot about your traditions,
(05:18):
your holidays, your I think I understand a lot. I
will put pictures of your cultural event and your family
up on my walls so the children get to see it,
and we're going to.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Talk about it.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
But that doesn't mean that I have fully accepted that
you make different parenting decisions than I do, that you
have a different set of priorities and values than I do.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
And so we have to.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Think about how do we not only look at people
and say, oh, yeah, you know, I heard that I
was going to have someone in my class who this
is happening to or who is like this. So I
did a lot of research and I have all the
facts in my head. There's a big difference between having
facts in your head and demonstrating acceptance.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It's like the difference between being like BookSmart and street smart.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Yeah, because like, yeah, you got all you got all
the knowledge.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Like, hey, I learned there was going to be this
a child like this in my class, so I've read
up on this is different than accepting everything that comes
along with that, right, Like you can spit out. Spitting
out facts is not accepting. That's just demonstrating that, you know, right,
not fully accepting. I think it's hard to sometimes be
(06:26):
fully accepting because you you will never fully know what
it's like to be in that culture or in that
because you aren't that right, So like sometimes I think
it's hard, but you have to really really try, you know.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
There are some things that I learn about that I
have knowledge about that I that I am not willing
to accept, right, Like criminal behavior.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I love a good criminal documentary. Oh yeah, she does.
I enjoy I enjoy sometimes watching court TV.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Sometimes no, it's it's it's to be a great case, yes,
but I do, like I'm I enjoy like watching court
TV because I'm interested in the intricacies and the testimony
and all the things that happened to bring you to
this day when you are on my television, I'm Court TV.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
But that doesn't mean that I'm going to accept it.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
That this what you know, I'm not accepting you when
families come to us and I'm you know, I'm suddenly
reminded of an uncle that I had who was part
of the deaf community, and you can you could have
learned a lot from him about being someone who is deaf,
(07:38):
about growing up, death, about the use of sign language,
about how he saw the world and the people in it.
He was a very intelligent man, and I'm sure I
was young, but I'm sure a wealth of knowledge. But
to accept him his values, the fact that he did
(08:03):
not speak but used American sign language, even though he
potentially could or right, he could speak, he was not
non verbal orally, but but.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It wasn't maybe what he fluent.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
He used American sign language to communicate.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
He deeply connected with the deaf community, and in fact,
he had been married twice in his life, both.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
To people who were also deaf.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
And so this was right, So you could have learned
if you knew my uncle, you could have learned so
much from him, but to demonstrate acceptance of him as
someone who walks in this world who is deaf, is
a whole other thing that is offering him the same
respect I would offer anyone. It is offering him the
(09:01):
same level of confidentiality.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
I would offer anyone.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
The same kindness and non biased interactions, which was something
I know he struggled with as someone who was deaf,
especially in his generation, people made a lot of assumptions
about him.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yes, and there were people who I think thought.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
They were being kind but actually but they were making
a lot of assumptions about him, and he knew it
and he felt it.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
And I think children.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
And families, when we do not fully accept whatever it is,
doesn't have to be. Culture can also be things like
neurological differences can be all sorts of learning differences can
be physical differences when you are not fully accepting.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
They feel it. Oh yeah, they know they feel it.
I know they sense it. I once had a student
who had a limb difference.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
That student, on one hand, had only two fingers, and
of course, like anybody you know, you adapt, and so
the student was able to do everything pretty much figured
it out, did it with the other hand, figured it
out right.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Figure out how we're gonna coordinate this.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
And I remember because of this limb difference and how
it looked that there were adults, like for example, other
families who would come in and you would see the
look on their face and they would talk to their
children about how this child is just like them, and
(10:39):
this child is a child who wants to play like them,
and you should go play with this child, and we're
gonna be nice and kind and.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
Oh, you could be helpful. But the look on their
face said, iw.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Yes, I know this because I have a little girl
in my class that has some disabilities with her legs
and how she walks.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
And you can tell, you could tell what the parents.
It's almost like au isn't just parents, either, could be staff.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
It's it's honestly some of the staff too. It's it's
like pity, the look on their faces, like oh, like ah,
this poor little Like yeah, but she doesn't. She does
more than some of the kids some of the other
kids do, like she nothing stops her and she doesn't,
you know, like just she's a little girl.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Like she doesn't that's who she is, and she.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Does everything that everybody else does. And sometimes more. She's
taking more risks on the playground than some other kids are,
so she doesn't she doesn't need your pity.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
You know, when adults need an assist of device to
move around, like a wheelchair or walker or something like that,
and they come to a door, the thing we're supposed
to do is look at them and say, would you
like me to hold it for you?
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Would you like me to open it for you? Because
they may want to do it on their own, but
I think.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
They're like, we like, I'm okay with asking that. I
think I should, But I think there's people like, oh,
I shouldn't even ask them.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
There are people who will say I shouldn't ask, I.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Shouldn't ask them.
Speaker 6 (12:06):
I should let I think, because there's both sides of
the coin here, and I should automatically help them whether
they want the help. There are those people too, And
then there's people like they can do it on their
own because this is their life, and I think there's
no like but there's no harm in asking, hey, would
you like me.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
To help you? I think that's respectful.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Yeah, I don't think that shows disrespect for lack of acceptance.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
It's just somebody not in a wheelchair at the door.
You would have no problem asking them, Hey, would you
like me to open the door for you?
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Right? You know that's what I don't. Well, I understand.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
So I go back to the child who had the
limb difference, who was so capable, And I remember there
were times when I would look at this child and say,
and this child was like three four years old, and
I would say, would you like my help?
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Do you want me to help?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
And very often the child said no, no, yeah, yeah,
and and was you know, I think that's also part
of when we shoe acceptance and respect. When you can
offer anyone help, yes, but to just jump in and
be like I'll do it is not as accepting of
their capabilities.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I think that's exactly right.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, you know, think about and I can think of
times in my life where I gained knowledge about something,
but I still felt a little uneasy with the person.
I still felt like maybe things I thought were right
and that things that person thought were wrong, which is
such a bias.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
We all have it though inside of us, and we
have to fight it.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
We have to be like, no, there's more than one
way to raise a child, There's more than one way
to live a life.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
There's more than one way to do this. Even within the.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
Parameters of early education. Should we all be using positive
approaches to teach behavior? Yes, we should always positive approaches,
but there are different ways.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
To apply those positive approaches. Right, so you may have
ten different approaches that work on behavior in a positive way.
I can think of three off the top of my head.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I can think of like conscious discipline, pyramid model, and
flip it.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Oh yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
So I feel like within those that you know, we should,
we need to do this.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
This is high quality practice. There's still a multiple ways
to skin the cat. Yeah, I probably shouldn't use that
phrase skin the cat. That's terrible.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Probably that's true shows my lack of acceptance of cats.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
No, I like cats. I'm a cat person.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
I almost I almost almost took kittens, but then I
have birds.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
I have birds. I couldn't We're so cute. I know
I couldn't do it, but I have birds. I have birds.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
Sorry, folks, I couldn't do it. I felt really bad too.
So at any rate, think about it. Think about it
this way. When you think about how does this supply
to my work? First, do I have knowledge? Because if
you don't you need to gain knowledge, gain the No,
But gaining the knowledge isn't enough. You have to figure
out how do I demonstrate my acceptance of this difference
(15:09):
from me?
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Right? How am I going to do that?
Speaker 2 (15:13):
And a lot of times it has to do with
giving people power, giving people decision making power, giving people
partnership with you power, giving people room and space to
just be themselves without judgment.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
One of the things when I conduct professional development we
ask for one organization I do it for. We always
ask what people need in order to make the training
valuable to them, and always always people put in that slide,
that anonymous slide. I need non judgment, I need no judgment.
(15:51):
People need to know that they are accepted, Their questions
are accepted, their curiosity is accepted. Their level of knowledge
wherever it is, is accepted. Your difference from me as acceptant.
Your similarities to me are accepted, because people are simultaneously
the same and different.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
You know all of that.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
I think we need to think about how my demonstrating
acceptance am I actually reaching out in partnership to the
children and families I work with in a very non
judgmental way, right, Right, So I hope that you will
take that and think about that and be a responder.
And if you don't know what I'm talking about, go
back to our last episode, go back one episode. Please
(16:35):
contact us if you can think of ways that you.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Show acceptance, we would love to share it.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
You can go to our Facebook page cold How Preschool
Teachers Do It, our website How Preschool Teachers dooit dot com.
You can go to YouTube and you can hold your
camera up to the QR code that Alison has just
leaned out of the way of and that will give
you the links to all of the many things that
we have, so you can feel free to go there.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
And always remember we've got resources online.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
We've got all sorts of things, so you may want
to periodically check there. But most important, we want you
to come back, So we hope you will come back
for the next episode of How Preschool Teachers Do It.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
Bye bye, Pepes
Welcome to how Preschool Teachers do It.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
I'm Cindy, I'm Alison, and we have a combined fifty
five years of experience working with children, families, and experts
in early education.
Speaker 3 (00:11):
We are not random influence. No, we are not.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
Whether you are new or have been our podcast peeps
since twenty eighteen, we are thrilled you found us.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Alison is scratching her eye right now.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
Preschool peeps, if you're not on, if you're not on YouTube,
you don't see that. But that's why she's laughing, because
I hit the record thing and she was like, oh,
hold on, nope, nope, we're on.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
So welcome, pre school peeps. We are very human podcast.
Is your eye Okay, yeah, it just got a little
itchy there. Oh I'm sorry to hear that. Okay, Okay,
folks really looking at everybody now, Okay, you're all right.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Okay, she needs to get the eye in good shape
because we have places to shout out and you have to.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Listen to them with my eye.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
All right. We are shouting out today the people of Madrid, Spain, So.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Hello, everybody.
Speaker 2 (01:08):
I feel like we have shouted out Madrid in the past.
That might be true, and so thank you for still
listening or bringing more people or being one of the
newer listeners in Madrid.
Speaker 3 (01:19):
And we are also shouting out Oklahoma. We shouted out Oklahoma.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
I don't think we have I think the last episode
we had somebody we'd never shouted out before, then today
and next week, so listen for that. These are people
we are not, at least in the United States. People
we have not shouted out before.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
So that's cool. That is cool.
Speaker 2 (01:38):
We're spreading in the United States, which is great. So
thank you for being with us, people in Madrid, people
in Oklahoma, people wherever you are. When there used to
be a children's show on when I was young, I'm
about to date myself called Romper Room and she had
a magic mirror and she would call children's name. She
would be like, let's see who I see in my
magic mirror, and she would say like, I see Alison today,
(02:02):
I see Cindy today, and she would give the generic
I see all of my friends today. That's how I
feel about Thank you all for being preschool peeps and
for and for coming back because you know, we know
you have lots of choices about what you're gonna listen to.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
And what you're gonna do. So thank you for coming
back or for finding us, which is great.
Speaker 2 (02:23):
And for those of you who may have found us
on this episode and you're thinking by the end of
it you're thinking, I want to listen to more episodes.
Speaker 3 (02:29):
Just no, binging us is actually a thing. It is
a thing.
Speaker 1 (02:32):
You can binge all what three and fifty something episodes?
People have done it.
Speaker 4 (02:35):
Yeah, people do it, and they tell us and then
they tell us and they write us. Are like, Hi,
I'm listening to episode forty five and I was just wondering.
I'm like, whoa forty five It's like a good six
years ago. I gotta go back and see what that
was about. But like, I love that people do that.
I do too, And you know, thanks to all of you. Yeah,
we are in fact still doing it.
Speaker 2 (02:53):
We are binge able, and we have received acknowledgment as
one of the top preschool podcass so we very much
appreciate that. Uh and maybe that's what makes us so
bingeable that we are one of the top preschool podcasts.
Speaker 3 (03:07):
But thank you, thank you all. I think we're just relatable.
There you go. We're real people. We are We're real people.
Who are here today to make a real different distinction.
Speaker 5 (03:17):
Thank you, my gosh, I don't know what just happened
there happened, Yeah, make a real distinction between two things
that sometimes I think get a little muddy.
Speaker 3 (03:28):
Okay, right, yeah, And it's.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
The two words that you saw in the title of
this episode, the difference between having knowledge and and the
difference between demonstrating how about that, demonstrating knowledge and demonstrating acceptance, Because,
for example, I can intentionally learn about someone's culture, yes,
(03:55):
and I can demonstrate that knowledge if you were to
ask me about it, right, I've learned about it and
I can spit some facts back at you, right, But
that doesn't mean that I have demonstrated my acceptance.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
Of the diversity.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
True.
Speaker 5 (04:09):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:09):
There's a difference between when people say like, oh, oh, yeah,
I read a lot about that sort of person, and
I know a lot about that sort of person, or
I majored in that in college and so I took
a lot of classes having to do with but then
demonstrating acceptance is very different.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
And what the way that we came.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
Across the notion of this was I think it was
a real on social media where an adult who is
on the spectrum of autism. Was talking about things like,
you might know a lot about how it is or
what it.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
Is to be on the spectrum of autism. You might
have a lot of knowledge.
Speaker 2 (04:57):
But she was like, you know, that doesn't mean that
you accept me for who I am and all the
things that come with it. And I think that's true
for so many of us, even you know not only
something like being on the spectrum of autism, but also
things like you know culture, like I've learned a lot
about it. I think I understand a lot about your traditions,
(05:18):
your holidays, your I think I understand a lot. I
will put pictures of your cultural event and your family
up on my walls so the children get to see it,
and we're going to.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Talk about it.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
But that doesn't mean that I have fully accepted that
you make different parenting decisions than I do, that you
have a different set of priorities and values than I do.
Speaker 3 (05:37):
And so we have to.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
Think about how do we not only look at people
and say, oh, yeah, you know, I heard that I
was going to have someone in my class who this
is happening to or who is like this. So I
did a lot of research and I have all the
facts in my head. There's a big difference between having
facts in your head and demonstrating acceptance.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
It's like the difference between being like BookSmart and street smart.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Yeah, because like, yeah, you got all you got all
the knowledge.
Speaker 1 (06:06):
Like, hey, I learned there was going to be this
a child like this in my class, so I've read
up on this is different than accepting everything that comes
along with that, right, Like you can spit out. Spitting
out facts is not accepting. That's just demonstrating that, you know, right,
not fully accepting. I think it's hard to sometimes be
(06:26):
fully accepting because you you will never fully know what
it's like to be in that culture or in that
because you aren't that right, So like sometimes I think
it's hard, but you have to really really try, you know.
Speaker 2 (06:38):
There are some things that I learn about that I
have knowledge about that I that I am not willing
to accept, right, Like criminal behavior.
Speaker 3 (06:44):
I love a good criminal documentary. Oh yeah, she does.
I enjoy I enjoy sometimes watching court TV.
Speaker 2 (06:52):
Sometimes no, it's it's it's to be a great case, yes,
but I do, like I'm I enjoy like watching court
TV because I'm interested in the intricacies and the testimony
and all the things that happened to bring you to
this day when you are on my television, I'm Court TV.
Speaker 3 (07:13):
But that doesn't mean that I'm going to accept it.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
That this what you know, I'm not accepting you when
families come to us and I'm you know, I'm suddenly
reminded of an uncle that I had who was part
of the deaf community, and you can you could have
learned a lot from him about being someone who is deaf,
(07:38):
about growing up, death, about the use of sign language,
about how he saw the world and the people in it.
He was a very intelligent man, and I'm sure I
was young, but I'm sure a wealth of knowledge. But
to accept him his values, the fact that he did
(08:03):
not speak but used American sign language, even though he
potentially could or right, he could speak, he was not
non verbal orally, but but.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
It wasn't maybe what he fluent.
Speaker 3 (08:24):
He used American sign language to communicate.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
He deeply connected with the deaf community, and in fact,
he had been married twice in his life, both.
Speaker 3 (08:35):
To people who were also deaf.
Speaker 2 (08:38):
And so this was right, So you could have learned
if you knew my uncle, you could have learned so
much from him, but to demonstrate acceptance of him as
someone who walks in this world who is deaf, is
a whole other thing that is offering him the same
respect I would offer anyone. It is offering him the
(09:01):
same level of confidentiality.
Speaker 3 (09:03):
I would offer anyone.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
The same kindness and non biased interactions, which was something
I know he struggled with as someone who was deaf,
especially in his generation, people made a lot of assumptions
about him.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
Yes, and there were people who I think thought.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
They were being kind but actually but they were making
a lot of assumptions about him, and he knew it
and he felt it.
Speaker 3 (09:28):
And I think children.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
And families, when we do not fully accept whatever it is,
doesn't have to be. Culture can also be things like
neurological differences can be all sorts of learning differences can
be physical differences when you are not fully accepting.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
They feel it. Oh yeah, they know they feel it.
I know they sense it. I once had a student
who had a limb difference.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
That student, on one hand, had only two fingers, and
of course, like anybody you know, you adapt, and so
the student was able to do everything pretty much figured
it out, did it with the other hand, figured it
out right.
Speaker 3 (10:15):
Figure out how we're gonna coordinate this.
Speaker 2 (10:18):
And I remember because of this limb difference and how
it looked that there were adults, like for example, other
families who would come in and you would see the
look on their face and they would talk to their
children about how this child is just like them, and
(10:39):
this child is a child who wants to play like them,
and you should go play with this child, and we're
gonna be nice and kind and.
Speaker 3 (10:46):
Oh, you could be helpful. But the look on their
face said, iw.
Speaker 1 (10:51):
Yes, I know this because I have a little girl
in my class that has some disabilities with her legs
and how she walks.
Speaker 3 (11:00):
And you can tell, you could tell what the parents.
It's almost like au isn't just parents, either, could be staff.
Speaker 1 (11:07):
It's it's honestly some of the staff too. It's it's
like pity, the look on their faces, like oh, like ah,
this poor little Like yeah, but she doesn't. She does
more than some of the kids some of the other
kids do, like she nothing stops her and she doesn't,
you know, like just she's a little girl.
Speaker 3 (11:25):
Like she doesn't that's who she is, and she.
Speaker 1 (11:29):
Does everything that everybody else does. And sometimes more. She's
taking more risks on the playground than some other kids are,
so she doesn't she doesn't need your pity.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
You know, when adults need an assist of device to
move around, like a wheelchair or walker or something like that,
and they come to a door, the thing we're supposed
to do is look at them and say, would you
like me to hold it for you?
Speaker 3 (11:53):
Would you like me to open it for you? Because
they may want to do it on their own, but
I think.
Speaker 1 (11:58):
They're like, we like, I'm okay with asking that. I
think I should, But I think there's people like, oh,
I shouldn't even ask them.
Speaker 3 (12:04):
There are people who will say I shouldn't ask, I.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Shouldn't ask them.
Speaker 6 (12:06):
I should let I think, because there's both sides of
the coin here, and I should automatically help them whether
they want the help. There are those people too, And
then there's people like they can do it on their
own because this is their life, and I think there's
no like but there's no harm in asking, hey, would
you like me.
Speaker 3 (12:19):
To help you? I think that's respectful.
Speaker 2 (12:22):
Yeah, I don't think that shows disrespect for lack of acceptance.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
It's just somebody not in a wheelchair at the door.
You would have no problem asking them, Hey, would you
like me to open the door for you?
Speaker 3 (12:33):
Right? You know that's what I don't. Well, I understand.
Speaker 2 (12:37):
So I go back to the child who had the
limb difference, who was so capable, And I remember there
were times when I would look at this child and say,
and this child was like three four years old, and
I would say, would you like my help?
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Do you want me to help?
Speaker 2 (12:50):
And very often the child said no, no, yeah, yeah,
and and was you know, I think that's also part
of when we shoe acceptance and respect. When you can
offer anyone help, yes, but to just jump in and
be like I'll do it is not as accepting of
their capabilities.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
I think that's exactly right.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Yeah, you know, think about and I can think of
times in my life where I gained knowledge about something,
but I still felt a little uneasy with the person.
I still felt like maybe things I thought were right
and that things that person thought were wrong, which is
such a bias.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
We all have it though inside of us, and we
have to fight it.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
We have to be like, no, there's more than one
way to raise a child, There's more than one way
to live a life.
Speaker 3 (13:42):
There's more than one way to do this. Even within the.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
Parameters of early education. Should we all be using positive
approaches to teach behavior? Yes, we should always positive approaches,
but there are different ways.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
To apply those positive approaches. Right, so you may have
ten different approaches that work on behavior in a positive way.
I can think of three off the top of my head.
Speaker 2 (14:07):
I can think of like conscious discipline, pyramid model, and
flip it.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Oh yes, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (14:14):
So I feel like within those that you know, we should,
we need to do this.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
This is high quality practice. There's still a multiple ways
to skin the cat. Yeah, I probably shouldn't use that
phrase skin the cat. That's terrible.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Probably that's true shows my lack of acceptance of cats.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
No, I like cats. I'm a cat person.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
I almost I almost almost took kittens, but then I
have birds.
Speaker 3 (14:39):
I have birds. I couldn't We're so cute. I know
I couldn't do it, but I have birds. I have birds.
Speaker 2 (14:45):
Sorry, folks, I couldn't do it. I felt really bad too.
So at any rate, think about it. Think about it
this way. When you think about how does this supply
to my work? First, do I have knowledge? Because if
you don't you need to gain knowledge, gain the No,
But gaining the knowledge isn't enough. You have to figure
out how do I demonstrate my acceptance of this difference
(15:09):
from me?
Speaker 1 (15:10):
Yes?
Speaker 3 (15:11):
Right? How am I going to do that?
Speaker 2 (15:13):
And a lot of times it has to do with
giving people power, giving people decision making power, giving people
partnership with you power, giving people room and space to
just be themselves without judgment.
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
One of the things when I conduct professional development we
ask for one organization I do it for. We always
ask what people need in order to make the training
valuable to them, and always always people put in that slide,
that anonymous slide. I need non judgment, I need no judgment.
(15:51):
People need to know that they are accepted, Their questions
are accepted, their curiosity is accepted. Their level of knowledge
wherever it is, is accepted. Your difference from me as acceptant.
Your similarities to me are accepted, because people are simultaneously
the same and different.
Speaker 3 (16:10):
You know all of that.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
I think we need to think about how my demonstrating
acceptance am I actually reaching out in partnership to the
children and families I work with in a very non
judgmental way, right, Right, So I hope that you will
take that and think about that and be a responder.
And if you don't know what I'm talking about, go
back to our last episode, go back one episode. Please
(16:35):
contact us if you can think of ways that you.
Speaker 3 (16:38):
Show acceptance, we would love to share it.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
You can go to our Facebook page cold How Preschool
Teachers Do It, our website How Preschool Teachers dooit dot com.
You can go to YouTube and you can hold your
camera up to the QR code that Alison has just
leaned out of the way of and that will give
you the links to all of the many things that
we have, so you can feel free to go there.
Speaker 3 (16:57):
And always remember we've got resources online.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
We've got all sorts of things, so you may want
to periodically check there. But most important, we want you
to come back, So we hope you will come back
for the next episode of How Preschool Teachers Do It.
Speaker 3 (17:10):
Bye bye, Pepes
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