496 -- Connection and Hibernation

Just an update on where I've been and expressing my fervent hopes that I'll be able to return to some version of normal within the foreseeable future...

Episode Transcript

(00:30):
Hey, this is Kate. Ijust wanted to give you guys an update
on where I am. I'm stillhere in some form of the word,
but I am not up to podcastinglately. I still have gastroparesis, and

(00:51):
I was doing quite a bit better. I was weaning off of the ivy
nutrition and just I'm really feeling human, and about two weeks ago my body
said, oh no about that.We're not We're not going to do that
anymore. So I'm really struggling.I am back on TPN Total Parental Nutrition,

(01:19):
so I bean nutrition every day,and it's been several days, several
many days since I've been able tokeep food down. And you don't need
more to tell them that, justyou get the idea. It's been unpleasant.

(01:40):
I feel awful about it because theone thing I had that really made
me feel functional and connected with theworld and just human was being able to
put out podcast episodes. And Iknow that that may sound shallow or stupid

(02:02):
or something, but it was connectingwith other people, and it was putting
proof of that work and that connectionout and I miss it like crazy.
So I hope to get back toit sooner rather than later. But right
now, We're not there. Rightnow, I'm not brave enough to get

(02:27):
that far away from the bathroom.And I'm also just I'm sleeping a lot.
I'm clinically malnourished again, and soyou know, some of the systems
of that are deep, deep fatigueand muscle aches and I'm cold all the
time. So basically I'm setting upa blanket for it, and I'm just

(02:50):
going to hide in there for alittle while. I very much hope to
get back on the podcasting routine assoon as I can. I miss you,
guys, and just just know thatI'm thinking about it. I haven't
given up. This isn't a hiatus, and it's certainly not fading out.

(03:14):
I just you and my guests deservethe best I can give you, and
right now, the best I cangive is silence. I can't think well,
and I can't put together a solidepisode. It's you know, how
you learn, like muscle memory orbrain memory, how to drive or how

(03:38):
to ride a bike, or howto cook something or whatever, and you
take enough time away from it andthen it's really really hard to do when
you return. That's that's me rightnow. That's me. So I'm trying,
and I miss you guys like crazy, and just just know that you

(04:00):
matter very much to me, andI'll be back as soon as i can.
Hang in there,