October 13, 2025 • 55 mins
Would you trust AI with your love life? Join the Moms as they talk to Sidney Marsh, CEO of Distill, about how her innovative dating app uses AI to match people in smarter, more meaningful ways. From red flag detection to compatibility matching, this is the future of romance--with a side of mom commentary, of course Don't miss this lively, insightful, and laugh-out-loud conversation!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Welcome, moms. Welcome to the Mom's Club. I'm Monica, Samuel
is your host, and I'm here with my lovely co host,
Julie Orchid.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Hi Monica, Hi Julie.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
I am so excited. You know, this show is pretty
special to us because our guest, we have a very
special guest we do.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
We have a guest that you know, treat is our own.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
You know.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well, that's what that takes me back to why the
Mom's Club to start out.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
With totally we love this story.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
We are a group of five moms. We started out
as close, close friends, and that's what so many of
you moms have out there. You have these close, tight
friendships that you're there for each other for everything. And
so our kids went to school together, graduated in twenty twenty,
which was rough, which was rough, and they moved. They've
(00:53):
done great, as we shall suit and see by yeah
when we're about to meet, but we're always we've traveled together.
Since that time, we become like truly lifelong.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
We've done everything together.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
There's been you know, some illnesses, you know, there's been
some surgeries, there's been some a divorce. You know, these
are a lot of things that you know women need
women for as friendships and groups. We've learned a lot
about each other when we travel together. We learn yeah,
who needs what? Who's snarky?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Who?
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Yeah? Like all of these things that friendships.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Who the good drivers are the good? Bad drivers?
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Are not mentioning any.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Name names because I'm the bad driver, but anyway, not
a bad but no, it's a supportive that's the thing.
The Mom's Club is all about your friendships and supporting
each other, and women have that and guys don't have those.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Listen.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I've always had a really strong group of friends. I'll
say that I went I was lucky enough to go
to a college where I still talk to those people
every day, happy to say my youngest is started there.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
But I will also say that our group.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We really really needed each other, and I would not
be the same person I am without you guys for sure,
Like it was really do or die these past five
years with you know you guys and my friends. So
I mean that really touches my heart. And I think
that you know, you need a group of friends that
you can talk to every day if you need to,
(02:23):
or that you need to cry with, or you need
to laugh with, or you know.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
It's it's critical.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
It's critical, and you don't really know it sometimes until
something happens that's hefty.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yeah, and we've had our hefty moments.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
Yeah, I feel like I'm leading the hefty moment lead.
I'd like someone else to do.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Keeping score on that. Yeah, we have one person in
or our group. He seemed everything goes great for her,
So she's our example. That would not be me, but no,
it's it's yeah, and that's what all all of you
moms who are out there who are listening, that you
all have that too in your life. I'm sure and
if you don't, I'm sure that you're going to meet
that group of women who will be your lifelong friends.
(03:02):
My mom had a group called the Bridge Club.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
They played bridge bridge one time, one time, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And they never did again. But they were together through everything.
And my mom, as of last October, the last survivor.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Oh yeah of her.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
Yeah, but that's a really good like a sign of
long friendships. So yeah, my kids used to make fun
of me because I'd be like, I'm going to book
club tonight.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
They're like, yeah, we know all about book club. What
are you reading? I don't know, but we're going to
book club tonight.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Read people read the book. Well, you know one person
who reads the book. Yeah, yeah, I actually did read.
I did read the last book.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I listened to the last book.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
I know you did, and you kept telling me, I'm
listening to it. I keep falling asleep.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
I never said that.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Well, the other great thing about the support that moms
give each other is that we can help each other
understand things that we may not understand because the world
is changing so fast, and so one of the things
that is changing is I'm learning a lot about dating.
You have two sons, and I don't quite understand how
(04:10):
the dating scene works for this new generation.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
So I mean, I'm sure they've tried to explain it to.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
The other night. For example, so my husband I went
to dinner at this restaurant and the boys, my son
and his friend were there, and they said, oh, yes,
our friend so and so he asked his girlfriend to
be official at this restaurant. It was they were talking
about how they helped plan it and the whole thing,
and I said, okay, explain to me the trajectory.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Explained to me the stage of dating.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Well, there's meeting them. I forgot what they called that
there's hooking up, which I didn't want to hear about.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Didn't you use the term hooking up? What they used
a different word?
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, I forgot what they said exclusive. And then there's
this moment where you have a restaurant meeting and you
officially ask for this girl to be your girlfriend.
Speaker 4 (05:06):
And so then, so what's the difference between Well, I
said exclusive, and yeah, I said, I said what girlfriend?
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Between the exclusive and officially girlfriend boyfriend? And the boys
didn't know. They said, oh, I don't know what now
that I stumped them, But then we asked them one
yesterday and they said, oh, no, the difference when your
boyfriend girlfriend you officially ask it means that you're going
to introduce them to your parents.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
And I had to question question because.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
My son spent a week's vacation at this girl's house
and met her parents and spent a week with them,
and I still was not allowed to call that girl
his girlfriend because oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well he didn't have the dinner, he didn't have the dinner,
and ask, yeah, just that.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Was happening when I hadn't even know there's not been official.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
You got Jeff Monica, I did.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
So I'm still confused, and this is my point. And
so that is why we are so excited today to
have a true expert in this field that she is.
But not only an expert, but the daughter of one
of our friends that we described earlier, and we'll meet
her later.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Well, she's not only the daughter, but she is an accomplished,
accomplished CEO.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Well, just let me give her.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
I'm sorry, I got real excited my own.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Proper do here. She is the CEO and co founder
of Distill, which is a next generation dating app that
uses AI technology to bring efficiency, transparency, and intentionality back
to modern dating apps.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
She's started in the.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Company as a senior at Dartmouth in twenty twenty four
and recently launched a beta version of this app in
New York City. Please welcome, Sydney Marsh. Welcome to the
Mom's Book. Well, Sydney, okay, so.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
How about that introduction?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
You like?
Speaker 6 (07:06):
That?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Was that a good introduction?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
That was perfect?
Speaker 1 (07:09):
Good? Thank you? Well, yeah, so, Sydney, we you're the expert.
And we know you're the expert because you've explained a
lot of this to us. I've we had many meetings
to discuss this.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Yeah, I didn't even Yeah, occasionally I was thinking to myself,
I have no idea what she's talking about, but I
was like, I kind of got it. So we're gonna
take it for all these moms like me out there
who aren't so tech savvy to understand. But this has
an AI artificial intelligence for you moms out there who
don't have any clue what's going on in the world
(07:42):
right now. It has that component which is a brand
new thing that's happening everywhere, and it's what makes Distill
different and exceptional. So can you explain, first of all,
what is Distill? Explain to someone who's a mom who
just woke up in this century and wants to know
(08:04):
what's going on here with this dating thing?
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Yeah, keep it. Keep it like breakfast round table. Like
if I'm asking you how your date was last night?
You know, Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Huney, I can do that.
Speaker 8 (08:15):
But yeah, So what I'm so excited about to still
is we're trying to have an entirely new paradigm for
online dating. So all these apps you've heard about, Tinder,
bumble hinge et cetera.
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Are all based off a swhite based paradigm and what
I mean by that is you see a.
Speaker 8 (08:30):
Bunch of options, you're spending less than a minute is
the average, looking at each profile, and you're making snap
decisions mostly based.
Speaker 7 (08:37):
On how attractive they are.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
Like, let's be honest, we think that that's super psychologically unhealthy.
It teaches you to commoditize people, and it's a massive
time waster. I mean, the average is people are spending
an hour days wipe thing. So when you're I mean, frankly,
a lot of my friends are investment bankers in New
York and just don't have the time to do that.
Speaker 7 (08:53):
They're working eighty hundred hours a week.
Speaker 8 (08:55):
So you think there is not only a better way
emotionally and psychologically, but also just to be efficient, like
you should spend your time resting or going to the
gym and working out, or connecting with friends.
Speaker 7 (09:05):
Are you know Lo and Behold actually go on a date.
Speaker 8 (09:08):
So what we're trying to do is basically democratize this
amazing thing which is matchmaking. And matchmaking has been around forever.
I'm sure you've heard people talk about the new Indian
Matchmaker Show or all of these things that are coming
out today. But what's great is that AI actually makes matchmaking,
which is typically a service that you have to pay
for and cost thousands, if not tens of thousands, up
(09:30):
to one hundred thousand dollars, and it's typically something people
would only do in America at least when they're much older,
like in their forties fifty sixties. We're bringing that downstream
to people in their twenties and thirties, and because of AI,
this can actually be an.
Speaker 7 (09:43):
Affordable service that everyone can use.
Speaker 8 (09:45):
So by you go on you onboard and you train
your personal AI agent about your personality and preferences, that
agent goes out and sources and vets matches for you,
which completely eliminates.
Speaker 7 (09:56):
The need to swipe.
Speaker 8 (09:57):
And instead of just doing that, it also so it
gives you the full agent to agent transcripts, So that
means your agent is talking to someone else's personalized trained agent.
So just think of it as their personal matchmaker who
their only job is to represent your interests.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
You can see the conversation between those two people.
Speaker 8 (10:12):
Imagine your two best friends talking to each other saying
I think that person A and person HY.
Speaker 7 (10:17):
Are great because of this, and you can see all
of that.
Speaker 8 (10:19):
So it's one hundred percent transparency as to why this
one was or wasn't a recommendation.
Speaker 7 (10:23):
So that's the high level.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Allah, yeah, that's perfect.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
But when you say vetting, like are you talking like
how deep does it go? As far as your personality?
Like what you're like, what you don't like, are you religious?
Are you you know? All these things that people like
run through the gamut of why you wouldn't like somebody
or you would absolutely.
Speaker 8 (10:45):
So what's so great is you can kind of make
the experiences personal and deep levels you want it to be.
Of course, sure, we have the basic level questions you
have to ask us, like what's your religious background, what's your.
Speaker 7 (10:55):
Age, where are you from?
Speaker 8 (10:56):
Things like that, But if you want to get very granular,
you want to say I want some and that wakes
up between seven and nine am. Like your agent can
vet based off of that preference. So the more information
you give us about what you like yourself and what
you hope to have in a partner, the more deeply
your agent can vet someone. So some common things we
see in the agent agent conversations are what's their communication style,
(11:18):
what's their future plans? Like, how do they view gender
roles in a marriage? Things like that so your agent
can really dive so much deeper than you ever could
on any other swipe based app.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
So when I first heard about this, I said, so
someday I'm going to go to someone's wedding and I'm
gonna say, how'd you two meet? And it's like, well,
our my AI agent met his and at all often, Yeah,
that's how this thing. They Yeah, it's but that's the
new world that we're in.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
So well, I love this because we're learning as moms,
we're evolving and like how this happens for you guys.
And you know what's so popular about online dating because
we didn't really have that, Like I didn't get to
put in that I wanted to date somebody who's six
to two, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
What I mean? Or you know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (12:01):
All these things that you like start out on the
regular app and then you move to this, So this
is even more personal about how it is. I mean,
we don't have to arrange marriages anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
We don't have to, well we kind of want to, well,
you know, and that's the city can help with that.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So anyway, but I'm just saying, like, in general, tell
us some stories about distill and you know.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
You've started this beta test. I mean, have you had
some successes? Have you seen some matches here?
Speaker 7 (12:31):
Absolutely?
Speaker 8 (12:31):
And one of the stories I love to tell is
related to this person. No i'll leave out his last name,
but he's okay with me sharing the story.
Speaker 7 (12:39):
So one of our great.
Speaker 8 (12:40):
Beta testers, a great guy in the city I know
him personally, got on the app. And something I should
mention is, because it's all AI and your AI is
going to continue to get better and learn with you,
it's not gonna be perfect the first time because we
don't have a perfect understanding what we want the first
time either.
Speaker 7 (12:54):
I mean, it's very.
Speaker 8 (12:54):
Easy for me to rattle off, oh yeah, build a
dream guy like this is what I want, but that's
not actually reflective of my t through preferences. So your
AI is going to learn along the way and get
refined and better with times. So the reason for that
is we have some good fits, which are people that
your AI agent thinks are within your stated preferences, and
(13:14):
then some not a good fits, which are people that
are slightly outside.
Speaker 7 (13:17):
Of those preferences. And what we've found is it's.
Speaker 8 (13:19):
Really helpful to show people both so you can kind
of get an understanding of oh, this is what my
agent actually thinks I want. Let's think about if that's
actually the case. So an example of this is Noah,
he sees this girl she's in is not a good
fits and he takes a very quick glance at her
profile and goes, I don't she's beautiful, she's the right age,
she's in the right location, she's got a great job.
Speaker 7 (13:39):
Why is this not a good fit? I would like
to meet her?
Speaker 8 (13:41):
So he goes into the agent agent conversation and actually
realizes that is agent uncovered that she's an extreme homebody
and he's actually quite extroverted and likes to go out
quite a bit.
Speaker 7 (13:51):
And he's like, that's not something I don't I would
have figured out until like the.
Speaker 8 (13:54):
Second or third date. And at that point that's like
eight hours of my time. Maybe if these dates are
generally going well, that's hundreds of dollars, it's one hundreds.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Of dollars later, so these.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Days especially, Yeah, yeah, that's interesting.
Speaker 8 (14:07):
So he's like, I'm so glad I know this because
I shouldn't go on a date with this groll. Maybe
we'd be great friends, but this isn't what I'm looking
for In a long term partner. And when you have
that intentional mindset of I only want to go on
a date with someone that I want to continue dating
and see long term, that just helps truly distill the
dating pool. You're not willing to go on a date
with everyone. You're wanting to go on a date with
just amazing, high quality fits for you.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
So when you showed us the beta, so when you
showed us how it works. By going through with us,
you created your own profile. So you put yourself into
this world and it gave you people that you mashed with,
and it gave you people you didn't. Now you as
the founder, the CEO, you can look through that and
did you make any adjustments, like you know because some
(14:50):
of the guys you know, some of them you don't,
the ones you actually know. Did you say, okay, that
that's not really driving with what I really know, So
maybe we need to refined because you said it's learning.
So did you make changes based on your own personal
experience with this or what have you learned from being
part of the distillery?
Speaker 8 (15:10):
I guess I think the biggest thing we've learned so
far in the beta is how can we ask people questions?
Speaker 7 (15:16):
That get them to reveal specifics about what they want.
Speaker 8 (15:19):
It's so easy to say, oh, yeah, I want someone
who's fun and good looking and like to have a
good time, Like that's great, doesn't really tell us that
much about you.
Speaker 7 (15:27):
We want to.
Speaker 8 (15:28):
Prompt people to say very specific things like I really
want someone who speaks a second language and would be
interested in teaching me that second language. Like we want
people to reveal specifics about them because on a Swite
based platform, the goals to kind of make yourself is
generalizably appealing to as many people as possible because you
want as many matches as possible. That's not how Distill works.
(15:49):
We want you to be authentically yourself and you shouldn't
match with hundreds of people at a time because people
don't like you. Should only have a couple of good
fits that are very highly tailored to you. So that's
kind of what we've been working on with the beta
is like, how do we get the right questions out
of people, how do we get people talking, how do
we learn and a big thing, I'll say the transition
(16:09):
from the beta to we're going to have a full
scale app that will be launched in the beginning of
twenty twenty six is the beta is just typing out survey.
Speaker 7 (16:21):
We're going to use voice AI.
Speaker 8 (16:23):
Actually it's in our onboarding process with a native app.
This means we can get people talking, we can figure
out where their voice gets excited and high pitched and like, Okay,
she really cares about family values because that's what she
started talking about. We're going to ask a questions about
that and use branch and technology to kind of follow
up on that.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I mean, it's no secret that people like if I
was going to go on a dating app, I'd probably
have Monica write it.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
I'm a good writer and she's a really good.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Writer, and then I'd go out at that date and
I'd be like it said what Yeah, So I mean
this is good that the voice activated things like that
because you make it really genuine and that's what I love.
Like you, like you said, you don't want twenty or
thirty people, you want the quality of three people.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, we talked yesterday a little bit. Are where are
you are you bringing.
Speaker 4 (17:10):
In more information about these people? I mean, do you
go to social media or how is it? Is it
intertwined or to make it more person.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
Besides what they're saying about themselves, because they can say
almost anything about themselves.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
I mean, I'm sure Monica you got a glowing yes,
I would, oh my gosh, you'd be very so desirable.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yes.
Speaker 7 (17:31):
Well.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
One of the big ways that we can kind of
verify if people are representing themselves accurately is, of course,
we have AI analysis of the photos you submit, so
like the three.
Speaker 7 (17:40):
To five photos that you give to us.
Speaker 8 (17:42):
Also, you can choose to upload screenshots of your Instagram
page or another social media page that you think represents you.
So that's kind of a way that we can kind
of match up your personalities. Like, for example, if I'm
super loud and boisterous in all my photos and I
describe myself as this quiet, timid little mouse, like my
AA agent's going to maybe yeah. An example of this
(18:02):
is my co founder, Like when we were initially doing
our testing before we had users, he made a profile
and was trying to present himself as a single person
he's been married for a while, using younger photos of
himself with his then girlfriend who's now his wife, and
his AI agent was like, I think you're dating someone.
Speaker 7 (18:19):
Why why is there all these pros like maybe maybe
you shouldn't be on this platform.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Yeah, yeah, exactly, there's going to be some of those
wild we can out there.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Nothing nothing is perfect, right, so and well I feel
like we can share this too. So you you have
a boyfriend that you met at the gym, So there's
the old fashioned way of doing this. So how do
you compare the old fashion way and what do you
believe the difference between If I'm advising my son, you know,
you should still go, you should join the running club,
(18:52):
you should do this, or hey, you should get on there.
Just still and maybe that's the way you can find
a match that's most perfect for you. Won't spend so
much time with this girl you think loves to run,
but turns out she's she really fitting for you, you
find out.
Speaker 7 (19:07):
Five weeks later.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
So what's your advice about that?
Speaker 7 (19:10):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 8 (19:11):
The first thing I'll say is I would never discourage
people from trying to reach out in real life. I
think that that's a great way to meet someone and
I love that that's the start of my story with
my now boyfriend. But yeah, I think that still is
just a great additional tool. Because there are a lot
of things and just for example, social media in general,
has made people unfortunately more intolerant to in person rejection
(19:34):
because it's so easy to tell online kind of get
a vibe for someone.
Speaker 7 (19:37):
Is or isn't into you, versus if you're cold approaching.
Speaker 8 (19:39):
Someone, it's either a flat yes or a flat no,
and you don't really know where it's going to go.
Speaker 7 (19:43):
So people are being increasingly like I think.
Speaker 8 (19:46):
There's a stat I saw from Date Psychology saying forty
five percent of men that are eighteen to twenty five
have never approached a woman before.
Speaker 7 (19:54):
I think that's a shame.
Speaker 8 (19:56):
I think people should approach people, but that's unfortunately the reality.
So we want to give people more tools available to
them so they have more opportunities to meet great people.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
That's amazing. I'm loving this. I feel like I think
it's good.
Speaker 5 (20:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Should should women who have a current boyfriend just fast
track it and say, hey, you need to get on distill.
I need to make you know do we match up?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Like it would be a way to figure we really
we are a good fit or maybe oops, we should
think about this.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Possibly. I don't have a future like.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Sect and act to this where people can just check out,
you know who they're dating and say like, let's all
put our stuff, let's just match ourselves.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
I think she's just trying to quality match some good pupils.
Speaker 5 (20:41):
I want to.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Totally quality match. So I'm just saying, if this is good,
think about it.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, I could just say this.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Is my perfect match. This is a better match than
if I kept.
Speaker 8 (20:49):
You know, we're certainly not building a platform that's aimed
to break up current couples, right.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Oh well I wouldn't. We hope that wouldn't happen. But
I mean, but if you save some marriages, you know,
that's another one.
Speaker 7 (21:01):
So I will say I'll say this one thing.
Speaker 8 (21:03):
There was someone that's on the platform that I dated briefly,
and my AA agent called out one.
Speaker 7 (21:09):
Or two reasons why it didn't think we were a
good fit. Those are exactly why we didn't continue.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
So yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Out exactly exactly.
Speaker 6 (21:19):
Great.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
How much how much do you have to go out
and talk about to still and tell me what your day,
what your day looks like?
Speaker 2 (21:28):
A absolutely?
Speaker 7 (21:29):
I think every day looks so different from me. I
mean truly week by week.
Speaker 8 (21:32):
Like for example, I'm booking my flight to SF for
Tech Week coming up in October, so I'll be doing
events for that. I mean, just last week I hosted
a founder funder mixer with Upfront Ventures. I'm going out
and meeting venture investors either just socially, to just build
those relationships, and very soon it's going to be truly
actually pitches, so having two or three pitches a day,
(21:55):
hopefully even more. But yeah, I mean, it varies so much.
I mean, tonight I'm going to an event to support
female founders, and that's also a big part of I mean,
female founders are so dear to my heart because I
am one, and also like there's so much room in
the world for where female founders can make so much
of impact, particularly with AI, because AI is going to
shape so much of the world. If women are not
(22:17):
at the table when those decisions about how we can
use it appropriately are made, it's going to have ripple
effects that affect everyone, including women.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I love that. I think we need to take a
class in AI.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
We definitely do. I will say this about AI one day.
I put my own name in there and see what
learn about myself. It was great. It was perfect spot
one except that said I had three children.
Speaker 9 (22:40):
You do.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
I'm still wondering who that third one is.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
I know who it is.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
She has her theory, but I'm like, yeah, so it's
not perfect. Everybody should know there are some things that
it doesn't get right. And I still look at the
spots works and.
Speaker 8 (22:54):
That's so important into like why we think the evolving
feedback loops. So when you're giving your answer, if you
are you aren't interested in suggested or not suggested fits,
It's going to get better because I mean I think
we're all just gonna be blown away by how good
AI becomes. Like even in a year from now, it's
going to be night and day different. So starting now
when it's still learning, so we have this amazing data
(23:15):
set and can create really interesting and accurate matches for everyone.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
Yeah, well it's very exciting, I mean, and it's exciting
that you're a CEO at soon to be twenty four
years old. That's very impressive. Yeah, who goes to you, Sydney.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
I mean this is amazing, sure, I mean, I've learned
do great things about this. This app is amazing, and
I can tell you that your pitch to this is
excellent because I have so many questions afterwards and love
to learn about it.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
So all of that's positive.
Speaker 4 (23:46):
I did ask you if I would be the oldest
person on your app, and you're.
Speaker 7 (23:52):
Like, it's aimed for people in their twenties.
Speaker 8 (23:54):
Twenties, so courage anyone if you have children and that
aing rage, should check it out exactly back.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
For gat children, I know, I know, I sometimes forget.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
We have some wonderful women, our zoomer moms, who I'm
sure have a lot of questions I know about this.
So welcome zoomer moms. Welcome to the moms.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Yes, okayt wait to do what we're gonna say.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
All right, welcome ladies. So let's start with Kathy. Tell
us a little bit about yourself. Where are you from?
And do you have a question for Sidney?
Speaker 5 (24:29):
Yeah, a million questions.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (24:32):
First of all, Sidney, my goodness, you're brilliant. I think
this is this is amazing because there's so many things
out there nowadays where they're triggering and people get angry
very easily, whether that be politics or religion or heck,
even your favorite sports team. This can avoid a lot
of those conflicts upfront, So kudos to you.
Speaker 7 (24:52):
My name is Kathy Ward.
Speaker 5 (24:53):
I'm from Plano, Texas.
Speaker 6 (24:55):
I've got a daughter who's twenty five and a son
who's twenty one, and they're the greatest bla things in
my life. And it's you know, Monica and I've had
this conversation. It's a very different point in your life.
And you love it. Like my daughter came to me
for advice today and I'm like, oh, I love it
when my kids ask me it for advice.
Speaker 7 (25:11):
You know.
Speaker 5 (25:12):
But I'm a former elected official.
Speaker 6 (25:14):
I'm a former special special education teacher, did radio for
about ten years here in the Dallas area, and currently
serve on a commission for the state of Texas. My
question is, do you have plans one for older people
like is down the road?
Speaker 5 (25:32):
You know, especially you know unfortunately.
Speaker 7 (25:34):
Divorce and I've been through a divorce before.
Speaker 6 (25:36):
It's part of it's part of the reality of our world.
Do you have plans to open up that field for
people who are older, who are maybe getting into their
second marriage or sometimes third marriage. And then also, is
there a way at Monica you kind of talked about it.
I would love to go in there and plug myself
(25:57):
in and my husband in. Maybe can you have a
separate apps people.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Who are like I don't think that is a bad
in the beginning of your marriage.
Speaker 6 (26:04):
You're like, well, I don't want to tell somebody that
I binge True Crime for twenty hours over right, So
do you all have some plans moving forward like those
with those areas?
Speaker 8 (26:15):
Absolutely great questions, And to your first one, I'll say
my vision for this app in the future that we
are right now targeting people in their twenties to thirties
and urban areas, is I want to see in everything
app I want I mean AI and agentic systems. So
not just one AI agent talking to another AI agent,
but this entire system of like little busy bees that
are communicating with each other and creating a fully fleshed
(26:35):
out ecosystem, can learn how different relationship dynamics work. Like
maybe like a man and a woman in their fifties
post divorce don't flirt or don't aren't attracted the same
types of things as a man and a woman that
are both twenty five. Do Maybe if like, like think
about jswipe, Maybe like that is a different set of
like qualities and qualifications, and that's what we can build to.
(26:56):
So not just you personally, but also the types of
relationships you're seeking. So absolutely we'd love to expand into
all different relationship types and ages, races, religions, everything like that.
In addition, I think that your second question gets it's
something that's so critical. What we've really discovered about our
beta pool is people. I mean, we've always known this,
(27:16):
but people love learning about themselves. It's why BuzzFeed is
such a big thing. People like to know what donut
they are, Like, people just love to hear about themselves
and just that process of self discovery and that's something
that's really cool without our platforms. So when you create
a profile and distill you, actually your AI agent generates
a personality and value summary about you, and that's something
that your matches can see. And you do have the
(27:38):
ability to make edits if you think, for whatever reason
something wasn't wrong. But that's kind of a cool way
to learn about yourself, and it could be a great
way that your partner can learn about you, Like, oh,
I didn't realize that you love travel photography and that's
a real big passion for you and that's so represented
on your social media page or it's something that you
talk about when you talking about your favorite pastimes. So
(27:58):
absolutely like that self descovery aspect, not just in your
preferences for a partner, but actually yourself. And an example
for me is people always tell me you're so extrovert,
you're so extroverted, whereas I kind of consider myself like
kind of in the middle. But then I sort of
saw myself through other people's eyes and I'm like, yeah,
actually I am pretty extroverted. I guess that's true, and
just learning more about myself. So absolutely love that.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
I just had a great idea, why don't we start
mom's clubs using this a I think people can actually
meet friends that We'll talk to her about that later. Yeah, Constanza,
welcome to the Mom's Club. Tell us where you're from,
a little bit about yourself and do you have a
question for Sydney.
Speaker 10 (28:36):
Oh yeah, hi guys. I'm Constanza. I am from Brazil,
currently living in Miami. I am a mother to a
beautiful and healthy and wonderful and incredible eleven year old daughter.
So this is very much top of mind for me,
and my ears are fully present and I am listening
and I am worried. So my daughter is eleven, I
(29:01):
can't help to think, you know, sort of what the
future holds for her when she's at the right age
of dating because as we know, it's not allowed quite yet. No,
but well to still make dating fun. And I think
this could all kind of mean a lot for everyone, right,
I feel like the fun of dating kind of is
completely out of the picture as recently, I'd hear from
my friends all the time. So how will this make
(29:22):
it more fun and exciting for it?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Good question, Dad?
Speaker 7 (29:25):
Like absolutely.
Speaker 8 (29:26):
And one of the big things I hear when I
ask people about their dating experience is, particularly people that
have a big online presence and have tried these apps,
is dating feels like a second job. Like I said,
you're swiping for an hour a day, You're going on
a bunch of first dates that don't lead to a
second It's exhausting, and people are having burnout. I mean
I recently read an article called people are taking situationships sabbaticals,
(29:46):
Like people can't even deal with situationships which aren't even
exclusive or with her girlfriend. It's like the first stage.
Speaker 7 (29:52):
So like, that's the.
Speaker 8 (29:54):
Level of burnout people are experiencing on these platforms, and
it's completely what we're trying to undo.
Speaker 7 (29:58):
And having your agent basically.
Speaker 8 (30:01):
Do the filtration process for you, which eliminates this massive
labor on your part should take make it more fun.
Like all you get to do is focus on the
actual connection element, not the filtration and the search element.
Speaker 7 (30:12):
That shouldn't be your job anymore. That's what AI is
so great.
Speaker 8 (30:14):
At another thing I'll mention for your daughter and just
for moms of girls everywhere, is we're taking a different
approach to what are the values that we're putting forward
on our apps. So when I mean my co founder
is a PhD in psychology, he was my psychology professor
at Dartmouth, And something he chatts about a lot is
like the different priorities for men and women, Like right
(30:35):
off the bat is men the number one thing they're
looking for is physical attractness. Women number one through five
things are looking for are honesty, reliability, safety, and security.
Things like this dating apps on this swipe based paradigm
have never highlighted those elements. Those are buried like maybe
you can infer like oh he seems nice in the photos,
(30:56):
but you don't really know, but us putting personality and
value reports and then this agentic conversation where you can
see like oh, here's his communication style and here's where
he talks about his family and friends and how important
that is to him. Like it's putting forward the things
that women really care about and putting that in the spotlight,
which has never really been the case for dating apps.
Speaker 7 (31:15):
So that's something I'm again as a female founder. I'm
very excited, yeah about it.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
So give us three top things that women want or like,
I mean, you've got to know, like what's in I
want to know what's important.
Speaker 7 (31:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (31:27):
So some of the top three are honesty, kindness, reliability.
So shouldn't come as a shock to any woman out there,
but those are very important.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
Yeah, I think it's cool that you bring it up.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
At honesty and yeah, that is number one.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
It's number one.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Lisa, Welcome to the Mom's Club. Tell us a little
bit about yourself, where you're from and do you have
a question for Sydney.
Speaker 11 (31:47):
Yes, Morris and I am married and.
Speaker 7 (31:51):
Have few daughters.
Speaker 11 (31:53):
One is thirty and one is thirty two and they
are both single.
Speaker 7 (31:58):
I'm listening in a qu I have a question on this.
Speaker 11 (32:01):
So I just think if I put my husband in there,
I love him and I think we're a great match,
but we would not have matched. So where do you
because I know that the things that were important to
me then are not the same things that are important
to me now. So if I'm basing it on what
was important to me when I'm twenty five, that might
not carry on through my life. But like opposites attract,
(32:21):
and there's some things you need a little tension. So
if following so much for this person, that's just it
almost feels like almost, Warren, I don't know, I don't
know what.
Speaker 7 (32:29):
Tell me you're taking care of that. So I'm so
glad you asked.
Speaker 8 (32:32):
And it gets a little bit into what Kathy mentioned about,
like do you want to expand this app to people
in different demographics like age wise or whatever, And yes,
we absolutely do, because relationships do look a little bit
different in different age categories and different demographics, with different backgrounds.
Whatever it is, people what they're looking for changes, and
it can change even in the span of five years.
(32:52):
And that's why AI knowing like all of these high
level patterns, being able to like kind of apply that
to its algorithm is going to be so great because
it can be such a tailored process. It's not like, oh,
here's just a blanket, like if this person checks these
boxes and this person checks these boxes will put them together. Also, again,
one thing I'll mention is going to be so important
is these evolving feedback loops. So as we gather a
(33:15):
massive set of data and a variety of different kinds
of people, AI want to think that's really really good
at is pattern recognition. So it will be able to say, oh,
just because Cindy and Kathy like have all these things
in common, they both said no to each other, why
is that happening? But Sydney's saying yes to people that
are completely different from her in terms of let's call
(33:37):
it politics or like level of religious dedication, whatever you
want to call it.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
So those are things that will get better with time.
Speaker 8 (33:45):
And it's kind of a data problem, and that's one
of the reasons why AI is going to be such
a benefit is helping uncover those underlying patterns that to
the naked human eye is just kind of glosses over
your head.
Speaker 4 (33:58):
What is some of the feedback that you get from
kids your age?
Speaker 2 (34:02):
I'm sorry I called you a kid, but you know
what I.
Speaker 7 (34:04):
Mean, Like, I still have heard of myself as a kid.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Okay, well I'm saying and that's how yes. Anyway, So
what's some of it?
Speaker 4 (34:11):
Yeah, I want to hear like what some of your
you know, the beta testers are saying, or like you
know people that are using your app.
Speaker 8 (34:19):
Mm, yeah, it's some things I get are people saying
it's like super fun to read the agent conversations, Like
they think it's so funny to see this little like
person in the cloud going out and representing them and
seeing how good or not good it maybe is. I know,
I've talked to a few girls that said they really
like that they're able to see like right off the front,
like what people's values are in their type of relationship
(34:41):
they're looking for versus like having to just play a
guessing game.
Speaker 7 (34:45):
And actually, like about half more.
Speaker 8 (34:47):
Than half of people and they're like eighteen to thirty
five are looking for serious relationships. It's all just about
getting those people together, like you don't want to throw
them all in the same pool, which is what all
of these swipe based apps are like, and it's like, okay,
figure out the person for you, Like no, Like the
way we're set up is you have to answer a
longer onboaring process like that filters some people out already,
Like if you're just looking to go on a date,
(35:09):
one night date with so many things attractive like that,
that's what tenders for.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Yeah, well that's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
So our last Zoomer mom today is a woman that
we know has a lot of concerns. She has two children,
a daughter especially, she's got very great concerns about her
daughter's dating life. So please welcome Jennifer Marsh, who is
Sydney's father. Yeah, welcome to the Zoomer room. And do
you have a question for Sydney.
Speaker 5 (35:35):
Yes, I'm not just a mom. I'm happy to be
the mom.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
That's right, that's good.
Speaker 5 (35:39):
And I am from Austin.
Speaker 9 (35:41):
She has a brother, Sam, who is also he's in college.
Speaker 5 (35:46):
So I've seen from her experience and his experience.
Speaker 9 (35:50):
How the world of dating is just so different than
it used to be. And a million reasons, like we
all know about the epidemic of loneliness, sent about the
inability for people to develop deep relationships and the limit
of time they spend, you know, in contact with another
one another and sort of having these face to face
(36:11):
conversations and sort of in the room breathing the same air.
And you know, everyone basically is questioning how to move
forward with technology.
Speaker 5 (36:21):
But still be human. And one of the things that I.
Speaker 9 (36:24):
Think is so interesting about when I'm so proud of
Sitting for doing is as she followed her heart and
stuck with her like her passion for psychology and worked
with her professor from her an entrepreneur who wasn't at Dartmouth,
but it is more the age of her professor as well.
Speaker 5 (36:44):
As her professor at Dartmouth.
Speaker 9 (36:48):
And you know, they really are trying to solve a
problem like this clearly.
Speaker 5 (36:52):
Needs to be a business. But I think first they're
trying to.
Speaker 9 (36:56):
Really figure out I mean, and that's the basis of
the original. They've kind of they've pivoted a number of times.
It's been a number of different things. But I mean, Sydney,
I'd love for you to tell me what you think.
Speaker 5 (37:06):
At this point.
Speaker 9 (37:07):
But I really think the core sort of drive behind
the whole app is like how do we create deep,
meaningful connections That is like that is the north star,
the guiding light, the city that drives all the thinking
behind the core architecture and engineering of the app.
Speaker 5 (37:27):
And Sydney, I love to hear what you think about that.
Speaker 8 (37:30):
Yeah, absolutely, And I also mentioned because I know you're
obviously a boy mom as I am a sister to Sam,
and I'll talk a little bit about the male experience,
especially with like the loneliness epidemic. And I remember learning
about this from Bill, my professor in college, and that
is there's an epidemic with everyone, but particularly with men,
that men are having less close relationships than they used
(37:52):
to and men are increasingly relying on girlfriends for that
emotional support. Yet people are seeing these dating apps and
they're not finding those meaningful relationships, which just creates such
a negative feedback loop that is just making all of society,
I think, worse in general. And the reason why I
wanted to do this, I didn't originally wake up and
be like, wow, I really want to build a dating app,
(38:13):
But being in college and being a psychology major and
learning about this, I'm like, wow, I really want to
find a way to help fight this. And romantic relationships
are such a protective factor in just your general psychological health.
I mean, if you're satisfied with your deep close relationships
friendships yes as well, but also romantic relationships, you are
a kinder, more empathetic person in general. And the ripple
(38:36):
effect is massive. And another example that this is something
my mom always says to us.
Speaker 7 (38:41):
Is the best thing you can do is go home and.
Speaker 8 (38:44):
Love your family, and that's one of the best things
you can do for the world. And a romantic relationship
is a big part of that. So if we can
help connect to to people that are an amazing fit
for you and can help you build a life with
this person, society gets.
Speaker 7 (38:58):
Better as a whole.
Speaker 8 (38:59):
And also I'll touch on one more thing, which I
think I talked about why this app is amazing for women,
I'm also going to talk about why it's amazing for men.
Of course I'm talking about heterosexual relationships in this instance,
but on swipe based platforms, women are interested in three
to fifteen percent of male profiles.
Speaker 7 (39:17):
On Distill, women are interested in over half the male
profiles they see because we give.
Speaker 8 (39:21):
You high quality profiles and we give you more information
the information you want to see. So men are having
a better success rate and women are seeing better quality.
Speaker 7 (39:30):
So I think it's a one when Yeah, personally.
Speaker 4 (39:32):
That girl you just put a bow on that That
is amazing, that is that's perfect.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
That is yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
How So in terms of the kind of questions like
are you looking more immediate dating meeting or like more
long term, because if you're thinking about your psychology majors,
you've gotta know how it works when you get married.
A little known secret is you basically married the whole family? Oh,
you're marrying everybody? That like, if you're not careful about
(39:59):
who you like, what's the what's the dynamic?
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I don't know, why are you looking at me?
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I guess i'd heard, but I'm not looking at you.
And that's just that's just that's just true. So how
deep are these do these questions get more extensive?
Speaker 4 (40:16):
Like do they talk about family? Do they talk about
their siblings? Do they talk about family life? Like your
mom says the best thing you can do is to
love your family. Which, by the way, Jennifer, that's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
That is you know what we've been asking for.
Speaker 5 (40:30):
I can't take any credit for that. That is a
quote from mother Teresa.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
I don't care where it came from, but you're teaching
your kids that. Yeah, so you should have taken.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Credit for it. Nobody would have known. But just even
more a bigger picture, you know, how much are you
really learning? Like if you learned, are you keeping in mind?
They're like, what are what's our relationship? Because I know
as a as a mom of two boys. Mothers of
boys are very protective throughout their lives and might be
(41:00):
quite opinionated about their future spouse or whatever and could
be very involved. Not that I will be.
Speaker 2 (41:06):
I will be very not at all money easy to.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Get along with, ye, But I mean do you put
that in their mind to like, Okay, what's your relationship
with your mother, what's your relationship with your father? What's
your like? Do you get into more things that actually
could long term? I mean you're getting them to meet
each other initially and get to know each other, but
to a put in their mind when I do meet
(41:27):
this person, maybe I should right be careful? How you know?
I when I am introduced to the in law, potential
in laws or whatever, what that looks like?
Speaker 2 (41:37):
Yeah? What do you think? Sid?
Speaker 8 (41:40):
So we do try and keep some of our questions
a little bit more open ended, but we do actually
have a question that very specifically targets tell us about
your childhood in your early life, like were you very
close with your family? Is that a core value for you?
Were you very emotionally tied to your hometown? Did you
move around a lot? So we do encourage people to
talk about that in general, and we want to give
(42:01):
people space to, like, if they want to talk about
one thing more than something else, like, that's their prerogative
to do so. And I do think using voice AI
to do these onboarding processes will get even better at that.
But yes, we do ask people one tell us about
what you want in general in a partner, and we
give some examples of like values like substance use, like politics,
(42:23):
things like that, and a big thing people often use
that space to talk about is future family planning, like
do you want to get married, do you want to
have kids?
Speaker 7 (42:31):
Do you want your parents involved?
Speaker 8 (42:32):
Like I see a lot of people use it for that,
but also your childhood, like people often talk about their
relationship with their parents and if they had a lot
of siblings and what that was like. So yes, that's
definitely something that is seen a lot on the app.
Speaker 2 (42:44):
Well that's key.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah, Well it's interesting to do because you all are psychologists,
so you can look into those things that are so important. Constanza,
I feel like you have another question over there.
Speaker 10 (42:57):
I mean, I'm ruin over here, King and you.
Speaker 4 (43:02):
You have I mean, this may be how your daughter
dates when you know what I mean and how it
happens for her, you have the whole I said, this
may be how it your daughter dates in the future,
and how it's going to happen for her.
Speaker 10 (43:15):
Yeah, so no, absolutely absolutely. I mean, listen, we all
hope that you know she she makes the right decision,
whether or not it's with an app or without an app.
But I feel like you know, by the time that
she's that she's ready to to take that step forward,
that everything will be bunted up a I will will
know exactly what it's doing. I just what I don't
want is that human connection to get lost within the pross.
(43:39):
I've had my fair share of bad boyfriends and good
boyfriend I know Mi I will have you know her
breakups and and heartbreaks. But that human connection is so important.
And sometimes, you know, you meet somebody and you fall
completely in love without even speaking.
Speaker 7 (43:54):
To each other.
Speaker 10 (43:55):
So yeah, I'm interested, I'm curious. I'm excited about this
for the future. It's the future's bread for you, Sydney,
so very very exciting stuff.
Speaker 7 (44:03):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 8 (44:05):
Yeah, And I love I love that you're focused on
that because that's obviously such a critical element. And I
wouldn't be doing what we're doing if human connection wasn't
such a critical part of it. So one thing I'll
mention really briefly with dating apps, and someone mentioned one
of my badizers mentioned this to me, and I thought
it was such a good quote, is that it feels
like a video game, Like it's like how many matches
can I get? How many points can I rack up?
Like how many inbound messages can I get? And like
(44:27):
that's the opposite of human connection. That's the commodification of people.
That's what we want to get away from. And I
think what's like, like I mentioned earlier, like the goal
of a dating profile be quote unquote successful is to
be generalizable to as many people as possible. And that's
the exact opposite of what we want you to do.
Speaker 7 (44:43):
On distill.
Speaker 8 (44:43):
We want you to be specific, a niche to what
you want and who you are, be as authentic as
you can so we can give you the most authentic connection,
and then from there we want you to go on
that date, because you don't really know until you see
that person in person, and then it's you have that
connection or you don't. And generally, if everyone is being
safe and we have safety features built in. There's it's
(45:04):
always great to go on that date because you learn
more about yourself for it. You'd be like, wow, I
thought this is someone that I wanted, turns out it's not,
or vice versa, like I really wasn't sure about this
going in. Oh my gosh, she's amazing. She's amazing whoever,
but I do think that is so important. So getting
people to go not just on dates, but on dates
that are highly likely to convert to a second and
(45:25):
third and wife or husband.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
So, yeah, can you meet.
Speaker 7 (45:28):
Each other voice notes?
Speaker 10 (45:30):
Is it something that if they chose to communicate and
maybe ta get a little bit, is that's on the my
ahead and hear their voice?
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Is that a possibility?
Speaker 8 (45:36):
So for the beta as of right now, no, but
for the app, yes, that is something we want to do.
So like, the way it would work is basically, your
agent recommends people.
Speaker 7 (45:44):
You say you're interested.
Speaker 8 (45:45):
If the other person alsoys they're interested in you, then
you go to a human to human chat in which
you could send voice notes, send messages, pictures, whatever, and
then decide if you want to meet up in person.
Speaker 1 (45:55):
What sha real quick that you mentioned safety? Can you
just mention that really quick, because I know a lot
of the reasons women are getting off of swhite basis
because they still don't feel like they're it's safe, They're
they're really worried about that.
Speaker 8 (46:07):
So yes, so a big thing that what we're able
to do with AIS you can kind of get a
sense for someone is the other online very public online presence.
Speaker 7 (46:15):
So one, we can look at the photos you submit.
Speaker 8 (46:17):
And tell with the high de group of confidence if
they're AI generated or not, because that's going to continue
to be an issue. It's going to be a greater
issue as time goes on, unfortunately. And also we can
say like, okay, you gave me these number of these
stats about you, like we can just do a broad based,
very public information search and be like we are ninety
percent sure or higher that you are who you say
you are, and even things like we're deciding if we
(46:39):
want to go through with this, but like if you
lie about your height, we can kind of tell from
your photos like as an.
Speaker 2 (46:46):
Age, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 8 (46:48):
So when it found you, and we do want to
make sure this is a like exclusive community, like this
is a community of people that are here for the
right reasons and putting checks in place to make sure that.
Speaker 9 (46:59):
That is the case.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Well, look correct me if I'm wrong, Sydney.
Speaker 4 (47:02):
But this feels really nice because it's a little bit
like the old fashioned way of meeting someone with a
modern twist and going together with technology as we evolve.
Speaker 8 (47:14):
Yes, no, yes, yes, yeah, we want to mimic how
people behave in real life dating, but use the benefit
of an online platform, which really just expands the community
available to you. So that's the benefit online dating, taking
away all the negative things that it's kind of turned
into in terms of the video gamification i'll call it of.
Speaker 7 (47:34):
Modern dating apps.
Speaker 1 (47:36):
Well, and that's also the all part of social media too,
because when you mentioned that it's how many you know
people say that I like you. It's the same thing
in social on Instagram or TikTok. You're looking how many
likes did I get? How many followers do I have?
But you think at that mindset, So, but you want
this to be You're trying to meet one person, not
say that I have a fan club of people that
decided that.
Speaker 2 (47:56):
Yeah, that sounds exhausting.
Speaker 4 (47:57):
Dating should be if it is enhances your life and
not exhausting, because really, a really good deep relationship should
be something that is like nice to have, not something
that you're like, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
I feel like it needs to complete, like it's a
job too, right, right, right? So I love it. Where
does Sam fit in the picture of distill? Please spill?
Is he signed up yet?
Speaker 7 (48:24):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (48:24):
I repeat that when we're your brother? Has he signed
up yet?
Speaker 7 (48:28):
He has signed up?
Speaker 2 (48:29):
Okay?
Speaker 8 (48:30):
I did not to know that a cute girl likes
him on it and I'm trying to bug get back
to her. Oh he's busy.
Speaker 7 (48:37):
He just moved into school.
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Yes, Oh well, that's my last question. So if that happens,
so cute girl likes you and you say that, do
you you put a bug in their other person's ear
because they have to just both decide they like each other.
Speaker 8 (48:51):
Do you So I will ever reveal that this specific
person likes anyone specific person, you would have an indification
that goes out. So someone on the platform is shown
interest in you, make sure to check back in and
if you're interested in anyone, indicate that.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
Okay, And then of.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Course, so it's connect you some kind of yes, no
maybe situation.
Speaker 4 (49:13):
Like when that happens and they connect someone on the
platform has shown interest in you, is it like yesno,
maybe I'll go out with them, or how does that?
Speaker 2 (49:22):
I mean yes?
Speaker 8 (49:24):
So actually, something that we're doing that's a little bit
different than you'd see on other dating apps is you
can choose to say yes, no, or maybe to someone,
but you would also say like I do or don't
want be connected. So you could say maybe, but I
want to be connected, or yes, but I don't want
to be connected, and that just could be like you
are interested in checking it out your traveling, so you're
not in the right place to go on a date,
(49:44):
but you still want the app to learn and get better.
And I do think this maybe is kind of critical
because having a forced choice on dating products, like there's
a big difference between someone that's a ninety five percent
no and a sixty percent no, right, So having a
way to kind of capch for that information is really
helpful because I know that, I mean I have I've
had to try out all these apps just to see
(50:05):
my competitive landscape, and sometimes it's like how fast can
I swipe away?
Speaker 3 (50:10):
Versus a okay, thinking about yeah, what do you want
us to know as moms about this dating app, like
or in dating in general, Like I've I'm down with.
Speaker 4 (50:23):
I've learned situationship. I've learned exclusive, you know, exclusive, and
then apparently you have to go out to dinner and
ask someone to be your girlfriend or boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (50:33):
I also learned the other day that just the boyfriend
girlfriend thing does not mean that we should start planning
the wedding because when I mentioned to those boys, oh,
are they getting married?
Speaker 2 (50:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (50:43):
Married?
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Yeah? So what do you want us to know?
Speaker 3 (50:46):
Like?
Speaker 2 (50:46):
Teaches something? So I don't stick my foot in my
mouth today.
Speaker 8 (50:50):
Absolutely, I mean, I think the biggest thing, and what
we've all kind of seen is dating is such an
evolving landscape and there's so many trends, and yes, some
of them are kind of clickbait, like Shrekking. I don't
know if you guys have heard of that.
Speaker 2 (51:00):
I have no idea what you're talking about. You know
the movie? Yeah, I do.
Speaker 8 (51:05):
Basically, shrekking is when you date someone that's standing down,
not attracted as.
Speaker 7 (51:09):
You because you're settling. So that's a fun little daytak
to Georgia why she didn't teach this way, but there is.
It's a lot of noise in just dating in general.
Speaker 8 (51:19):
It's like, oh, dress this way, dressed that way like
or act this way or say this line like it's
so much noise and clutter. But we're trying to do
is just make it a simplistic, minimalistic process, like I
know who I am, what I want. Maybe your agent
can help you clarify that even further through like learning
about yourself on the app and find you an amazing
(51:41):
person and spend less time on the app, not more.
We're not trying to increase daily active users. We're trying
to increase amazing data.
Speaker 1 (51:49):
People out there having great dates.
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Well is filtering?
Speaker 1 (51:52):
I love it? I love it so Sydney. Where did
they find Where does the our audience find you on
social media? Or how they sign their children up for
distill or whatever they choo get signed up.
Speaker 12 (52:08):
Lisa on both talking, Instagram at Distill dot Dating and
you can go to distill dating dot com to sign
up for the beta access code is curate.
Speaker 8 (52:24):
But native app will be coming out very very soon.
So some cities to start getting excited for Dallas, Austin, Miami,
s f Chicago, Nashville, all start getting excited because we're
coming to your.
Speaker 2 (52:36):
City possible launch.
Speaker 1 (52:38):
Please say so much city, Thanks.
Speaker 2 (52:39):
For spilling the tea on that one.
Speaker 1 (52:41):
Yeah, speaking of launch cities, that just segues right, we're
doing we are doing Mom's Club events in cities across
the country where you'll see us in Nashville, Atlanta, Dallas,
We're going to be all over the place. So moms,
you can bring your mom tarage of friends together and
we will commiserate and we'll all talk about our kids dating.
Speaker 2 (53:04):
Like okay, ed you that.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
Yeah, see now I know what Shreking was. Now you'll know,
and so it will sound really important and like we
know what we're talking about. So, yeah, this is exciting.
So Mom's check out check that out. Also, if you
want to be a zoomer mom like the moms that
you saw on this show, please go to our website
at inside the Mom's Club dot com and there is
a button you can hit and go and submit a form,
(53:26):
put a little video up, and we may call you
to be a zoomer mom on our show. You can
also find us on all the social media platforms at
Inside the Mom's Club. And we would also like to
thank our sponsor, New Calm. If you put the words
Mom's Club in the code at checkout, you'll get fifteen
percent off every month of your subscription. It is well
(53:47):
worth it. We would not be sitting here today, or
at least Julie would not be sitting here.
Speaker 4 (53:53):
Today if it would be a little bit more grumpy,
that's what it would be. Yeah, it helps, maybe not
as kind.
Speaker 1 (53:58):
Complete better and it really does work. Deep sleep. I
slept great last night because I had deep Yes, you did,
I did. I overrode all the snoring that was going
on in the room that we were.
Speaker 7 (54:10):
Yeah, it's great.
Speaker 1 (54:13):
As always, this show goes by so fast. I'm sorry
to see it in another episode. Must and and make
way for the next episodes. And well, first of all,
don't forget if you don't laugh, sometimes you're gonna cry.
Say that every day, remind yourself of that, and then
we will see you next time. Inside the Mom's Club. Hi,
(54:47):
welcome to inside the Mom's Club, where being a mom
is the coolest place to be. Here in the Mom's Club,
we believe that what embarrasses you now will make a.
Speaker 2 (54:56):
Great story later.
Speaker 1 (54:57):
And let's face it, you don't laugh, sometimes you're gonna cry.
Join us in having a good laugh together. I'm Monica Samuels.
You are now inside the Mom's Club. Your private destination
for all things Mom.
Speaker 7 (55:12):
Think you saying they're running spect me
Welcome, moms. Welcome to the Mom's Club. I'm Monica, Samuel
is your host, and I'm here with my lovely co host,
Julie Orchid.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Hi Monica, Hi Julie.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
I am so excited. You know, this show is pretty
special to us because our guest, we have a very
special guest we do.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
We have a guest that you know, treat is our own.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
You know.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
Well, that's what that takes me back to why the
Mom's Club to start out.
Speaker 2 (00:30):
With totally we love this story.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
We are a group of five moms. We started out
as close, close friends, and that's what so many of
you moms have out there. You have these close, tight
friendships that you're there for each other for everything. And
so our kids went to school together, graduated in twenty twenty,
which was rough, which was rough, and they moved. They've
(00:53):
done great, as we shall suit and see by yeah
when we're about to meet, but we're always we've traveled together.
Since that time, we become like truly lifelong.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
We've done everything together.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
There's been you know, some illnesses, you know, there's been
some surgeries, there's been some a divorce. You know, these
are a lot of things that you know women need
women for as friendships and groups. We've learned a lot
about each other when we travel together. We learn yeah,
who needs what? Who's snarky?
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Who?
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Yeah? Like all of these things that friendships.
Speaker 1 (01:26):
Who the good drivers are the good? Bad drivers?
Speaker 2 (01:29):
Are not mentioning any.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
Name names because I'm the bad driver, but anyway, not
a bad but no, it's a supportive that's the thing.
The Mom's Club is all about your friendships and supporting
each other, and women have that and guys don't have those.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Listen.
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I've always had a really strong group of friends. I'll
say that I went I was lucky enough to go
to a college where I still talk to those people
every day, happy to say my youngest is started there.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
But I will also say that our group.
Speaker 4 (02:02):
We really really needed each other, and I would not
be the same person I am without you guys for sure,
Like it was really do or die these past five
years with you know you guys and my friends. So
I mean that really touches my heart. And I think
that you know, you need a group of friends that
you can talk to every day if you need to,
(02:23):
or that you need to cry with, or you need
to laugh with, or you know.
Speaker 2 (02:28):
It's it's critical.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
It's critical, and you don't really know it sometimes until
something happens that's hefty.
Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yeah, and we've had our hefty moments.
Speaker 4 (02:37):
Yeah, I feel like I'm leading the hefty moment lead.
I'd like someone else to do.
Speaker 1 (02:41):
Keeping score on that. Yeah, we have one person in
or our group. He seemed everything goes great for her,
So she's our example. That would not be me, but no,
it's it's yeah, and that's what all all of you
moms who are out there who are listening, that you
all have that too in your life. I'm sure and
if you don't, I'm sure that you're going to meet
that group of women who will be your lifelong friends.
(03:02):
My mom had a group called the Bridge Club.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
They played bridge bridge one time, one time, Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
And they never did again. But they were together through everything.
And my mom, as of last October, the last survivor.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Oh yeah of her.
Speaker 4 (03:18):
Yeah, but that's a really good like a sign of
long friendships. So yeah, my kids used to make fun
of me because I'd be like, I'm going to book
club tonight.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
They're like, yeah, we know all about book club. What
are you reading? I don't know, but we're going to
book club tonight.
Speaker 1 (03:32):
Read people read the book. Well, you know one person
who reads the book. Yeah, yeah, I actually did read.
I did read the last book.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
I listened to the last book.
Speaker 1 (03:43):
I know you did, and you kept telling me, I'm
listening to it. I keep falling asleep.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
I never said that.
Speaker 1 (03:50):
Well, the other great thing about the support that moms
give each other is that we can help each other
understand things that we may not understand because the world
is changing so fast, and so one of the things
that is changing is I'm learning a lot about dating.
You have two sons, and I don't quite understand how
(04:10):
the dating scene works for this new generation.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
So I mean, I'm sure they've tried to explain it to.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
The other night. For example, so my husband I went
to dinner at this restaurant and the boys, my son
and his friend were there, and they said, oh, yes,
our friend so and so he asked his girlfriend to
be official at this restaurant. It was they were talking
about how they helped plan it and the whole thing,
and I said, okay, explain to me the trajectory.
Speaker 2 (04:38):
Explained to me the stage of dating.
Speaker 1 (04:41):
Well, there's meeting them. I forgot what they called that
there's hooking up, which I didn't want to hear about.
Speaker 2 (04:47):
Didn't you use the term hooking up? What they used
a different word?
Speaker 1 (04:51):
Yeah, I forgot what they said exclusive. And then there's
this moment where you have a restaurant meeting and you
officially ask for this girl to be your girlfriend.
Speaker 4 (05:06):
And so then, so what's the difference between Well, I
said exclusive, and yeah, I said, I said what girlfriend?
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Between the exclusive and officially girlfriend boyfriend? And the boys
didn't know. They said, oh, I don't know what now
that I stumped them, But then we asked them one
yesterday and they said, oh, no, the difference when your
boyfriend girlfriend you officially ask it means that you're going
to introduce them to your parents.
Speaker 4 (05:35):
And I had to question question because.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
My son spent a week's vacation at this girl's house
and met her parents and spent a week with them,
and I still was not allowed to call that girl
his girlfriend because oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Well he didn't have the dinner, he didn't have the dinner,
and ask, yeah, just that.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
Was happening when I hadn't even know there's not been official.
Speaker 2 (05:58):
You got Jeff Monica, I did.
Speaker 1 (06:00):
So I'm still confused, and this is my point. And
so that is why we are so excited today to
have a true expert in this field that she is.
But not only an expert, but the daughter of one
of our friends that we described earlier, and we'll meet
her later.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Well, she's not only the daughter, but she is an accomplished,
accomplished CEO.
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Well, just let me give her.
Speaker 2 (06:25):
I'm sorry, I got real excited my own.
Speaker 1 (06:28):
Proper do here. She is the CEO and co founder
of Distill, which is a next generation dating app that
uses AI technology to bring efficiency, transparency, and intentionality back
to modern dating apps.
Speaker 2 (06:43):
She's started in the.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Company as a senior at Dartmouth in twenty twenty four
and recently launched a beta version of this app in
New York City. Please welcome, Sydney Marsh. Welcome to the
Mom's Book. Well, Sydney, okay, so.
Speaker 2 (07:04):
How about that introduction?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
You like?
Speaker 6 (07:06):
That?
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Was that a good introduction?
Speaker 2 (07:07):
That was perfect?
Speaker 1 (07:09):
Good? Thank you? Well, yeah, so, Sydney, we you're the expert.
And we know you're the expert because you've explained a
lot of this to us. I've we had many meetings
to discuss this.
Speaker 2 (07:21):
Huh.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
Yeah, I didn't even Yeah, occasionally I was thinking to myself,
I have no idea what she's talking about, but I
was like, I kind of got it. So we're gonna
take it for all these moms like me out there
who aren't so tech savvy to understand. But this has
an AI artificial intelligence for you moms out there who
don't have any clue what's going on in the world
(07:42):
right now. It has that component which is a brand
new thing that's happening everywhere, and it's what makes Distill
different and exceptional. So can you explain, first of all,
what is Distill? Explain to someone who's a mom who
just woke up in this century and wants to know
(08:04):
what's going on here with this dating thing?
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Yeah, keep it. Keep it like breakfast round table. Like
if I'm asking you how your date was last night?
You know, Okay, go ahead.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Huney, I can do that.
Speaker 8 (08:15):
But yeah, So what I'm so excited about to still
is we're trying to have an entirely new paradigm for
online dating. So all these apps you've heard about, Tinder,
bumble hinge et cetera.
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Are all based off a swhite based paradigm and what
I mean by that is you see a.
Speaker 8 (08:30):
Bunch of options, you're spending less than a minute is
the average, looking at each profile, and you're making snap
decisions mostly based.
Speaker 7 (08:37):
On how attractive they are.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
Like, let's be honest, we think that that's super psychologically unhealthy.
It teaches you to commoditize people, and it's a massive
time waster. I mean, the average is people are spending
an hour days wipe thing. So when you're I mean, frankly,
a lot of my friends are investment bankers in New
York and just don't have the time to do that.
Speaker 7 (08:53):
They're working eighty hundred hours a week.
Speaker 8 (08:55):
So you think there is not only a better way
emotionally and psychologically, but also just to be efficient, like
you should spend your time resting or going to the
gym and working out, or connecting with friends.
Speaker 7 (09:05):
Are you know Lo and Behold actually go on a date.
Speaker 8 (09:08):
So what we're trying to do is basically democratize this
amazing thing which is matchmaking. And matchmaking has been around forever.
I'm sure you've heard people talk about the new Indian
Matchmaker Show or all of these things that are coming
out today. But what's great is that AI actually makes matchmaking,
which is typically a service that you have to pay
for and cost thousands, if not tens of thousands, up
(09:30):
to one hundred thousand dollars, and it's typically something people
would only do in America at least when they're much older,
like in their forties fifty sixties. We're bringing that downstream
to people in their twenties and thirties, and because of AI,
this can actually be an.
Speaker 7 (09:43):
Affordable service that everyone can use.
Speaker 8 (09:45):
So by you go on you onboard and you train
your personal AI agent about your personality and preferences, that
agent goes out and sources and vets matches for you,
which completely eliminates.
Speaker 7 (09:56):
The need to swipe.
Speaker 8 (09:57):
And instead of just doing that, it also so it
gives you the full agent to agent transcripts, So that
means your agent is talking to someone else's personalized trained agent.
So just think of it as their personal matchmaker who
their only job is to represent your interests.
Speaker 7 (10:10):
You can see the conversation between those two people.
Speaker 8 (10:12):
Imagine your two best friends talking to each other saying
I think that person A and person HY.
Speaker 7 (10:17):
Are great because of this, and you can see all
of that.
Speaker 8 (10:19):
So it's one hundred percent transparency as to why this
one was or wasn't a recommendation.
Speaker 7 (10:23):
So that's the high level.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Allah, yeah, that's perfect.
Speaker 4 (10:27):
But when you say vetting, like are you talking like
how deep does it go? As far as your personality?
Like what you're like, what you don't like, are you religious?
Are you you know? All these things that people like
run through the gamut of why you wouldn't like somebody
or you would absolutely.
Speaker 8 (10:45):
So what's so great is you can kind of make
the experiences personal and deep levels you want it to be.
Of course, sure, we have the basic level questions you
have to ask us, like what's your religious background, what's your.
Speaker 7 (10:55):
Age, where are you from?
Speaker 8 (10:56):
Things like that, But if you want to get very granular,
you want to say I want some and that wakes
up between seven and nine am. Like your agent can
vet based off of that preference. So the more information
you give us about what you like yourself and what
you hope to have in a partner, the more deeply
your agent can vet someone. So some common things we
see in the agent agent conversations are what's their communication style,
(11:18):
what's their future plans? Like, how do they view gender
roles in a marriage? Things like that so your agent
can really dive so much deeper than you ever could
on any other swipe based app.
Speaker 1 (11:27):
So when I first heard about this, I said, so
someday I'm going to go to someone's wedding and I'm
gonna say, how'd you two meet? And it's like, well,
our my AI agent met his and at all often, Yeah,
that's how this thing. They Yeah, it's but that's the
new world that we're in.
Speaker 4 (11:44):
So well, I love this because we're learning as moms,
we're evolving and like how this happens for you guys.
And you know what's so popular about online dating because
we didn't really have that, Like I didn't get to
put in that I wanted to date somebody who's six
to two, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
What I mean? Or you know what I mean.
Speaker 4 (12:01):
All these things that you like start out on the
regular app and then you move to this, So this
is even more personal about how it is. I mean,
we don't have to arrange marriages anymore.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
We don't have to, well we kind of want to, well,
you know, and that's the city can help with that.
Speaker 2 (12:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (12:17):
So anyway, but I'm just saying, like, in general, tell
us some stories about distill and you know.
Speaker 1 (12:25):
You've started this beta test. I mean, have you had
some successes? Have you seen some matches here?
Speaker 7 (12:31):
Absolutely?
Speaker 8 (12:31):
And one of the stories I love to tell is
related to this person. No i'll leave out his last name,
but he's okay with me sharing the story.
Speaker 7 (12:39):
So one of our great.
Speaker 8 (12:40):
Beta testers, a great guy in the city I know
him personally, got on the app. And something I should
mention is, because it's all AI and your AI is
going to continue to get better and learn with you,
it's not gonna be perfect the first time because we
don't have a perfect understanding what we want the first
time either.
Speaker 7 (12:54):
I mean, it's very.
Speaker 8 (12:54):
Easy for me to rattle off, oh yeah, build a
dream guy like this is what I want, but that's
not actually reflective of my t through preferences. So your
AI is going to learn along the way and get
refined and better with times. So the reason for that
is we have some good fits, which are people that
your AI agent thinks are within your stated preferences, and
(13:14):
then some not a good fits, which are people that
are slightly outside.
Speaker 7 (13:17):
Of those preferences. And what we've found is it's.
Speaker 8 (13:19):
Really helpful to show people both so you can kind
of get an understanding of oh, this is what my
agent actually thinks I want. Let's think about if that's
actually the case. So an example of this is Noah,
he sees this girl she's in is not a good
fits and he takes a very quick glance at her
profile and goes, I don't she's beautiful, she's the right age,
she's in the right location, she's got a great job.
Speaker 7 (13:39):
Why is this not a good fit? I would like
to meet her?
Speaker 8 (13:41):
So he goes into the agent agent conversation and actually
realizes that is agent uncovered that she's an extreme homebody
and he's actually quite extroverted and likes to go out
quite a bit.
Speaker 7 (13:51):
And he's like, that's not something I don't I would
have figured out until like the.
Speaker 8 (13:54):
Second or third date. And at that point that's like
eight hours of my time. Maybe if these dates are
generally going well, that's hundreds of dollars, it's one hundreds.
Speaker 2 (14:03):
Of dollars later, so these.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Days especially, Yeah, yeah, that's interesting.
Speaker 8 (14:07):
So he's like, I'm so glad I know this because
I shouldn't go on a date with this groll. Maybe
we'd be great friends, but this isn't what I'm looking
for In a long term partner. And when you have
that intentional mindset of I only want to go on
a date with someone that I want to continue dating
and see long term, that just helps truly distill the
dating pool. You're not willing to go on a date
with everyone. You're wanting to go on a date with
just amazing, high quality fits for you.
Speaker 1 (14:29):
So when you showed us the beta, so when you
showed us how it works. By going through with us,
you created your own profile. So you put yourself into
this world and it gave you people that you mashed with,
and it gave you people you didn't. Now you as
the founder, the CEO, you can look through that and
did you make any adjustments, like you know because some
(14:50):
of the guys you know, some of them you don't,
the ones you actually know. Did you say, okay, that
that's not really driving with what I really know, So
maybe we need to refined because you said it's learning.
So did you make changes based on your own personal
experience with this or what have you learned from being
part of the distillery?
Speaker 8 (15:10):
I guess I think the biggest thing we've learned so
far in the beta is how can we ask people questions?
Speaker 7 (15:16):
That get them to reveal specifics about what they want.
Speaker 8 (15:19):
It's so easy to say, oh, yeah, I want someone
who's fun and good looking and like to have a
good time, Like that's great, doesn't really tell us that
much about you.
Speaker 7 (15:27):
We want to.
Speaker 8 (15:28):
Prompt people to say very specific things like I really
want someone who speaks a second language and would be
interested in teaching me that second language. Like we want
people to reveal specifics about them because on a Swite
based platform, the goals to kind of make yourself is
generalizably appealing to as many people as possible because you
want as many matches as possible. That's not how Distill works.
(15:49):
We want you to be authentically yourself and you shouldn't
match with hundreds of people at a time because people
don't like you. Should only have a couple of good
fits that are very highly tailored to you. So that's
kind of what we've been working on with the beta
is like, how do we get the right questions out
of people, how do we get people talking, how do
we learn and a big thing, I'll say the transition
(16:09):
from the beta to we're going to have a full
scale app that will be launched in the beginning of
twenty twenty six is the beta is just typing out survey.
Speaker 7 (16:21):
We're going to use voice AI.
Speaker 8 (16:23):
Actually it's in our onboarding process with a native app.
This means we can get people talking, we can figure
out where their voice gets excited and high pitched and like, Okay,
she really cares about family values because that's what she
started talking about. We're going to ask a questions about
that and use branch and technology to kind of follow
up on that.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
I mean, it's no secret that people like if I
was going to go on a dating app, I'd probably
have Monica write it.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
I'm a good writer and she's a really good.
Speaker 4 (16:50):
Writer, and then I'd go out at that date and
I'd be like it said what Yeah, So I mean
this is good that the voice activated things like that
because you make it really genuine and that's what I love.
Like you, like you said, you don't want twenty or
thirty people, you want the quality of three people.
Speaker 2 (17:06):
Yeah, we talked yesterday a little bit. Are where are
you are you bringing.
Speaker 4 (17:10):
In more information about these people? I mean, do you
go to social media or how is it? Is it
intertwined or to make it more person.
Speaker 1 (17:18):
Besides what they're saying about themselves, because they can say
almost anything about themselves.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
I mean, I'm sure Monica you got a glowing yes,
I would, oh my gosh, you'd be very so desirable.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
Yes.
Speaker 7 (17:31):
Well.
Speaker 8 (17:31):
One of the big ways that we can kind of
verify if people are representing themselves accurately is, of course,
we have AI analysis of the photos you submit, so
like the three.
Speaker 7 (17:40):
To five photos that you give to us.
Speaker 8 (17:42):
Also, you can choose to upload screenshots of your Instagram
page or another social media page that you think represents you.
So that's kind of a way that we can kind
of match up your personalities. Like, for example, if I'm
super loud and boisterous in all my photos and I
describe myself as this quiet, timid little mouse, like my
AA agent's going to maybe yeah. An example of this
(18:02):
is my co founder, Like when we were initially doing
our testing before we had users, he made a profile
and was trying to present himself as a single person
he's been married for a while, using younger photos of
himself with his then girlfriend who's now his wife, and
his AI agent was like, I think you're dating someone.
Speaker 7 (18:19):
Why why is there all these pros like maybe maybe
you shouldn't be on this platform.
Speaker 4 (18:24):
Yeah, yeah, exactly, there's going to be some of those
wild we can out there.
Speaker 1 (18:32):
Nothing nothing is perfect, right, so and well I feel
like we can share this too. So you you have
a boyfriend that you met at the gym, So there's
the old fashioned way of doing this. So how do
you compare the old fashion way and what do you
believe the difference between If I'm advising my son, you know,
you should still go, you should join the running club,
(18:52):
you should do this, or hey, you should get on there.
Just still and maybe that's the way you can find
a match that's most perfect for you. Won't spend so
much time with this girl you think loves to run,
but turns out she's she really fitting for you, you
find out.
Speaker 7 (19:07):
Five weeks later.
Speaker 1 (19:08):
So what's your advice about that?
Speaker 7 (19:10):
Absolutely not.
Speaker 8 (19:11):
The first thing I'll say is I would never discourage
people from trying to reach out in real life. I
think that that's a great way to meet someone and
I love that that's the start of my story with
my now boyfriend. But yeah, I think that still is
just a great additional tool. Because there are a lot
of things and just for example, social media in general,
has made people unfortunately more intolerant to in person rejection
(19:34):
because it's so easy to tell online kind of get
a vibe for someone.
Speaker 7 (19:37):
Is or isn't into you, versus if you're cold approaching.
Speaker 8 (19:39):
Someone, it's either a flat yes or a flat no,
and you don't really know where it's going to go.
Speaker 7 (19:43):
So people are being increasingly like I think.
Speaker 8 (19:46):
There's a stat I saw from Date Psychology saying forty
five percent of men that are eighteen to twenty five
have never approached a woman before.
Speaker 7 (19:54):
I think that's a shame.
Speaker 8 (19:56):
I think people should approach people, but that's unfortunately the reality.
So we want to give people more tools available to
them so they have more opportunities to meet great people.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
That's amazing. I'm loving this. I feel like I think
it's good.
Speaker 5 (20:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:10):
Should should women who have a current boyfriend just fast
track it and say, hey, you need to get on distill.
I need to make you know do we match up?
Speaker 2 (20:20):
Oh?
Speaker 1 (20:21):
Like it would be a way to figure we really
we are a good fit or maybe oops, we should
think about this.
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Possibly. I don't have a future like.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
Sect and act to this where people can just check out,
you know who they're dating and say like, let's all
put our stuff, let's just match ourselves.
Speaker 4 (20:37):
I think she's just trying to quality match some good pupils.
Speaker 5 (20:41):
I want to.
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Totally quality match. So I'm just saying, if this is good,
think about it.
Speaker 2 (20:45):
Yeah, I could just say this.
Speaker 1 (20:46):
Is my perfect match. This is a better match than
if I kept.
Speaker 8 (20:49):
You know, we're certainly not building a platform that's aimed
to break up current couples, right.
Speaker 1 (20:54):
Oh well I wouldn't. We hope that wouldn't happen. But
I mean, but if you save some marriages, you know,
that's another one.
Speaker 7 (21:01):
So I will say I'll say this one thing.
Speaker 8 (21:03):
There was someone that's on the platform that I dated briefly,
and my AA agent called out one.
Speaker 7 (21:09):
Or two reasons why it didn't think we were a
good fit. Those are exactly why we didn't continue.
Speaker 1 (21:14):
So yeah, that's.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
Out exactly exactly.
Speaker 6 (21:19):
Great.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
How much how much do you have to go out
and talk about to still and tell me what your day,
what your day looks like?
Speaker 2 (21:28):
A absolutely?
Speaker 7 (21:29):
I think every day looks so different from me. I
mean truly week by week.
Speaker 8 (21:32):
Like for example, I'm booking my flight to SF for
Tech Week coming up in October, so I'll be doing
events for that. I mean, just last week I hosted
a founder funder mixer with Upfront Ventures. I'm going out
and meeting venture investors either just socially, to just build
those relationships, and very soon it's going to be truly
actually pitches, so having two or three pitches a day,
(21:55):
hopefully even more. But yeah, I mean, it varies so much.
I mean, tonight I'm going to an event to support
female founders, and that's also a big part of I mean,
female founders are so dear to my heart because I
am one, and also like there's so much room in
the world for where female founders can make so much
of impact, particularly with AI, because AI is going to
shape so much of the world. If women are not
(22:17):
at the table when those decisions about how we can
use it appropriately are made, it's going to have ripple
effects that affect everyone, including women.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
I love that. I think we need to take a
class in AI.
Speaker 1 (22:29):
We definitely do. I will say this about AI one day.
I put my own name in there and see what
learn about myself. It was great. It was perfect spot
one except that said I had three children.
Speaker 9 (22:40):
You do.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
I'm still wondering who that third one is.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
I know who it is.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
She has her theory, but I'm like, yeah, so it's
not perfect. Everybody should know there are some things that
it doesn't get right. And I still look at the
spots works and.
Speaker 8 (22:54):
That's so important into like why we think the evolving
feedback loops. So when you're giving your answer, if you
are you aren't interested in suggested or not suggested fits,
It's going to get better because I mean I think
we're all just gonna be blown away by how good
AI becomes. Like even in a year from now, it's
going to be night and day different. So starting now
when it's still learning, so we have this amazing data
(23:15):
set and can create really interesting and accurate matches for everyone.
Speaker 1 (23:20):
Yeah, well it's very exciting, I mean, and it's exciting
that you're a CEO at soon to be twenty four
years old. That's very impressive. Yeah, who goes to you, Sydney.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
I mean this is amazing, sure, I mean, I've learned
do great things about this. This app is amazing, and
I can tell you that your pitch to this is
excellent because I have so many questions afterwards and love
to learn about it.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
So all of that's positive.
Speaker 4 (23:46):
I did ask you if I would be the oldest
person on your app, and you're.
Speaker 7 (23:52):
Like, it's aimed for people in their twenties.
Speaker 8 (23:54):
Twenties, so courage anyone if you have children and that
aing rage, should check it out exactly back.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
For gat children, I know, I know, I sometimes forget.
Speaker 1 (24:03):
We have some wonderful women, our zoomer moms, who I'm
sure have a lot of questions I know about this.
So welcome zoomer moms. Welcome to the moms.
Speaker 2 (24:12):
Yes, okayt wait to do what we're gonna say.
Speaker 1 (24:14):
All right, welcome ladies. So let's start with Kathy. Tell
us a little bit about yourself. Where are you from?
And do you have a question for Sidney?
Speaker 5 (24:29):
Yeah, a million questions.
Speaker 3 (24:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 6 (24:32):
First of all, Sidney, my goodness, you're brilliant. I think
this is this is amazing because there's so many things
out there nowadays where they're triggering and people get angry
very easily, whether that be politics or religion or heck,
even your favorite sports team. This can avoid a lot
of those conflicts upfront, So kudos to you.
Speaker 7 (24:52):
My name is Kathy Ward.
Speaker 5 (24:53):
I'm from Plano, Texas.
Speaker 6 (24:55):
I've got a daughter who's twenty five and a son
who's twenty one, and they're the greatest bla things in
my life. And it's you know, Monica and I've had
this conversation. It's a very different point in your life.
And you love it. Like my daughter came to me
for advice today and I'm like, oh, I love it
when my kids ask me it for advice.
Speaker 7 (25:11):
You know.
Speaker 5 (25:12):
But I'm a former elected official.
Speaker 6 (25:14):
I'm a former special special education teacher, did radio for
about ten years here in the Dallas area, and currently
serve on a commission for the state of Texas. My
question is, do you have plans one for older people
like is down the road?
Speaker 5 (25:32):
You know, especially you know unfortunately.
Speaker 7 (25:34):
Divorce and I've been through a divorce before.
Speaker 6 (25:36):
It's part of it's part of the reality of our world.
Do you have plans to open up that field for
people who are older, who are maybe getting into their
second marriage or sometimes third marriage. And then also, is
there a way at Monica you kind of talked about it.
I would love to go in there and plug myself
(25:57):
in and my husband in. Maybe can you have a
separate apps people.
Speaker 1 (26:00):
Who are like I don't think that is a bad
in the beginning of your marriage.
Speaker 6 (26:04):
You're like, well, I don't want to tell somebody that
I binge True Crime for twenty hours over right, So
do you all have some plans moving forward like those
with those areas?
Speaker 8 (26:15):
Absolutely great questions, And to your first one, I'll say
my vision for this app in the future that we
are right now targeting people in their twenties to thirties
and urban areas, is I want to see in everything
app I want I mean AI and agentic systems. So
not just one AI agent talking to another AI agent,
but this entire system of like little busy bees that
are communicating with each other and creating a fully fleshed
(26:35):
out ecosystem, can learn how different relationship dynamics work. Like
maybe like a man and a woman in their fifties
post divorce don't flirt or don't aren't attracted the same
types of things as a man and a woman that
are both twenty five. Do Maybe if like, like think
about jswipe, Maybe like that is a different set of
like qualities and qualifications, and that's what we can build to.
(26:56):
So not just you personally, but also the types of
relationships you're seeking. So absolutely we'd love to expand into
all different relationship types and ages, races, religions, everything like that.
In addition, I think that your second question gets it's
something that's so critical. What we've really discovered about our
beta pool is people. I mean, we've always known this,
(27:16):
but people love learning about themselves. It's why BuzzFeed is
such a big thing. People like to know what donut
they are, Like, people just love to hear about themselves
and just that process of self discovery and that's something
that's really cool without our platforms. So when you create
a profile and distill you, actually your AI agent generates
a personality and value summary about you, and that's something
that your matches can see. And you do have the
(27:38):
ability to make edits if you think, for whatever reason
something wasn't wrong. But that's kind of a cool way
to learn about yourself, and it could be a great
way that your partner can learn about you, Like, oh,
I didn't realize that you love travel photography and that's
a real big passion for you and that's so represented
on your social media page or it's something that you
talk about when you talking about your favorite pastimes. So
(27:58):
absolutely like that self descovery aspect, not just in your
preferences for a partner, but actually yourself. And an example
for me is people always tell me you're so extrovert,
you're so extroverted, whereas I kind of consider myself like
kind of in the middle. But then I sort of
saw myself through other people's eyes and I'm like, yeah,
actually I am pretty extroverted. I guess that's true, and
just learning more about myself. So absolutely love that.
Speaker 1 (28:19):
I just had a great idea, why don't we start
mom's clubs using this a I think people can actually
meet friends that We'll talk to her about that later. Yeah, Constanza,
welcome to the Mom's Club. Tell us where you're from,
a little bit about yourself and do you have a
question for Sydney.
Speaker 10 (28:36):
Oh yeah, hi guys. I'm Constanza. I am from Brazil,
currently living in Miami. I am a mother to a
beautiful and healthy and wonderful and incredible eleven year old daughter.
So this is very much top of mind for me,
and my ears are fully present and I am listening
and I am worried. So my daughter is eleven, I
(29:01):
can't help to think, you know, sort of what the
future holds for her when she's at the right age
of dating because as we know, it's not allowed quite yet. No,
but well to still make dating fun. And I think
this could all kind of mean a lot for everyone, right,
I feel like the fun of dating kind of is
completely out of the picture as recently, I'd hear from
my friends all the time. So how will this make
(29:22):
it more fun and exciting for it?
Speaker 2 (29:24):
Good question, Dad?
Speaker 7 (29:25):
Like absolutely.
Speaker 8 (29:26):
And one of the big things I hear when I
ask people about their dating experience is, particularly people that
have a big online presence and have tried these apps,
is dating feels like a second job. Like I said,
you're swiping for an hour a day, You're going on
a bunch of first dates that don't lead to a
second It's exhausting, and people are having burnout. I mean
I recently read an article called people are taking situationships sabbaticals,
(29:46):
Like people can't even deal with situationships which aren't even
exclusive or with her girlfriend. It's like the first stage.
Speaker 7 (29:52):
So like, that's the.
Speaker 8 (29:54):
Level of burnout people are experiencing on these platforms, and
it's completely what we're trying to undo.
Speaker 7 (29:58):
And having your agent basically.
Speaker 8 (30:01):
Do the filtration process for you, which eliminates this massive
labor on your part should take make it more fun.
Like all you get to do is focus on the
actual connection element, not the filtration and the search element.
Speaker 7 (30:12):
That shouldn't be your job anymore. That's what AI is
so great.
Speaker 8 (30:14):
At another thing I'll mention for your daughter and just
for moms of girls everywhere, is we're taking a different
approach to what are the values that we're putting forward
on our apps. So when I mean my co founder
is a PhD in psychology, he was my psychology professor
at Dartmouth, And something he chatts about a lot is
like the different priorities for men and women, Like right
(30:35):
off the bat is men the number one thing they're
looking for is physical attractness. Women number one through five
things are looking for are honesty, reliability, safety, and security.
Things like this dating apps on this swipe based paradigm
have never highlighted those elements. Those are buried like maybe
you can infer like oh he seems nice in the photos,
(30:56):
but you don't really know, but us putting personality and
value reports and then this agentic conversation where you can
see like oh, here's his communication style and here's where
he talks about his family and friends and how important
that is to him. Like it's putting forward the things
that women really care about and putting that in the spotlight,
which has never really been the case for dating apps.
Speaker 7 (31:15):
So that's something I'm again as a female founder. I'm
very excited, yeah about it.
Speaker 4 (31:18):
So give us three top things that women want or like,
I mean, you've got to know, like what's in I
want to know what's important.
Speaker 7 (31:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 8 (31:27):
So some of the top three are honesty, kindness, reliability.
So shouldn't come as a shock to any woman out there,
but those are very important.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
Yeah, I think it's cool that you bring it up.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
At honesty and yeah, that is number one.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
It's number one.
Speaker 1 (31:41):
Lisa, Welcome to the Mom's Club. Tell us a little
bit about yourself, where you're from and do you have
a question for Sydney.
Speaker 11 (31:47):
Yes, Morris and I am married and.
Speaker 7 (31:51):
Have few daughters.
Speaker 11 (31:53):
One is thirty and one is thirty two and they
are both single.
Speaker 7 (31:58):
I'm listening in a qu I have a question on this.
Speaker 11 (32:01):
So I just think if I put my husband in there,
I love him and I think we're a great match,
but we would not have matched. So where do you
because I know that the things that were important to
me then are not the same things that are important
to me now. So if I'm basing it on what
was important to me when I'm twenty five, that might
not carry on through my life. But like opposites attract,
(32:21):
and there's some things you need a little tension. So
if following so much for this person, that's just it
almost feels like almost, Warren, I don't know, I don't
know what.
Speaker 7 (32:29):
Tell me you're taking care of that. So I'm so
glad you asked.
Speaker 8 (32:32):
And it gets a little bit into what Kathy mentioned about,
like do you want to expand this app to people
in different demographics like age wise or whatever, And yes,
we absolutely do, because relationships do look a little bit
different in different age categories and different demographics, with different backgrounds.
Whatever it is, people what they're looking for changes, and
it can change even in the span of five years.
(32:52):
And that's why AI knowing like all of these high
level patterns, being able to like kind of apply that
to its algorithm is going to be so great because
it can be such a tailored process. It's not like, oh,
here's just a blanket, like if this person checks these
boxes and this person checks these boxes will put them together. Also, again,
one thing I'll mention is going to be so important
is these evolving feedback loops. So as we gather a
(33:15):
massive set of data and a variety of different kinds
of people, AI want to think that's really really good
at is pattern recognition. So it will be able to say, oh,
just because Cindy and Kathy like have all these things
in common, they both said no to each other, why
is that happening? But Sydney's saying yes to people that
are completely different from her in terms of let's call
(33:37):
it politics or like level of religious dedication, whatever you
want to call it.
Speaker 7 (33:42):
So those are things that will get better with time.
Speaker 8 (33:45):
And it's kind of a data problem, and that's one
of the reasons why AI is going to be such
a benefit is helping uncover those underlying patterns that to
the naked human eye is just kind of glosses over
your head.
Speaker 4 (33:58):
What is some of the feedback that you get from
kids your age?
Speaker 2 (34:02):
I'm sorry I called you a kid, but you know
what I.
Speaker 7 (34:04):
Mean, Like, I still have heard of myself as a kid.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Okay, well I'm saying and that's how yes. Anyway, So
what's some of it?
Speaker 4 (34:11):
Yeah, I want to hear like what some of your
you know, the beta testers are saying, or like you
know people that are using your app.
Speaker 8 (34:19):
Mm, yeah, it's some things I get are people saying
it's like super fun to read the agent conversations, Like
they think it's so funny to see this little like
person in the cloud going out and representing them and
seeing how good or not good it maybe is. I know,
I've talked to a few girls that said they really
like that they're able to see like right off the front,
like what people's values are in their type of relationship
(34:41):
they're looking for versus like having to just play a
guessing game.
Speaker 7 (34:45):
And actually, like about half more.
Speaker 8 (34:47):
Than half of people and they're like eighteen to thirty
five are looking for serious relationships. It's all just about
getting those people together, like you don't want to throw
them all in the same pool, which is what all
of these swipe based apps are like, and it's like, okay,
figure out the person for you, Like no, Like the
way we're set up is you have to answer a
longer onboaring process like that filters some people out already,
Like if you're just looking to go on a date,
(35:09):
one night date with so many things attractive like that,
that's what tenders for.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
Yeah, well that's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (35:15):
So our last Zoomer mom today is a woman that
we know has a lot of concerns. She has two children,
a daughter especially, she's got very great concerns about her
daughter's dating life. So please welcome Jennifer Marsh, who is
Sydney's father. Yeah, welcome to the Zoomer room. And do
you have a question for Sydney.
Speaker 5 (35:35):
Yes, I'm not just a mom. I'm happy to be
the mom.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
That's right, that's good.
Speaker 5 (35:39):
And I am from Austin.
Speaker 9 (35:41):
She has a brother, Sam, who is also he's in college.
Speaker 5 (35:46):
So I've seen from her experience and his experience.
Speaker 9 (35:50):
How the world of dating is just so different than
it used to be. And a million reasons, like we
all know about the epidemic of loneliness, sent about the
inability for people to develop deep relationships and the limit
of time they spend, you know, in contact with another
one another and sort of having these face to face
(36:11):
conversations and sort of in the room breathing the same air.
And you know, everyone basically is questioning how to move
forward with technology.
Speaker 5 (36:21):
But still be human. And one of the things that I.
Speaker 9 (36:24):
Think is so interesting about when I'm so proud of
Sitting for doing is as she followed her heart and
stuck with her like her passion for psychology and worked
with her professor from her an entrepreneur who wasn't at Dartmouth,
but it is more the age of her professor as well.
Speaker 5 (36:44):
As her professor at Dartmouth.
Speaker 9 (36:48):
And you know, they really are trying to solve a
problem like this clearly.
Speaker 5 (36:52):
Needs to be a business. But I think first they're
trying to.
Speaker 9 (36:56):
Really figure out I mean, and that's the basis of
the original. They've kind of they've pivoted a number of times.
It's been a number of different things. But I mean, Sydney,
I'd love for you to tell me what you think.
Speaker 5 (37:06):
At this point.
Speaker 9 (37:07):
But I really think the core sort of drive behind
the whole app is like how do we create deep,
meaningful connections That is like that is the north star,
the guiding light, the city that drives all the thinking
behind the core architecture and engineering of the app.
Speaker 5 (37:27):
And Sydney, I love to hear what you think about that.
Speaker 8 (37:30):
Yeah, absolutely, And I also mentioned because I know you're
obviously a boy mom as I am a sister to Sam,
and I'll talk a little bit about the male experience,
especially with like the loneliness epidemic. And I remember learning
about this from Bill, my professor in college, and that
is there's an epidemic with everyone, but particularly with men,
that men are having less close relationships than they used
(37:52):
to and men are increasingly relying on girlfriends for that
emotional support. Yet people are seeing these dating apps and
they're not finding those meaningful relationships, which just creates such
a negative feedback loop that is just making all of society,
I think, worse in general. And the reason why I
wanted to do this, I didn't originally wake up and
be like, wow, I really want to build a dating app,
(38:13):
But being in college and being a psychology major and
learning about this, I'm like, wow, I really want to
find a way to help fight this. And romantic relationships
are such a protective factor in just your general psychological health.
I mean, if you're satisfied with your deep close relationships
friendships yes as well, but also romantic relationships, you are
a kinder, more empathetic person in general. And the ripple
(38:36):
effect is massive. And another example that this is something
my mom always says to us.
Speaker 7 (38:41):
Is the best thing you can do is go home and.
Speaker 8 (38:44):
Love your family, and that's one of the best things
you can do for the world. And a romantic relationship
is a big part of that. So if we can
help connect to to people that are an amazing fit
for you and can help you build a life with
this person, society gets.
Speaker 7 (38:58):
Better as a whole.
Speaker 8 (38:59):
And also I'll touch on one more thing, which I
think I talked about why this app is amazing for women,
I'm also going to talk about why it's amazing for men.
Of course I'm talking about heterosexual relationships in this instance,
but on swipe based platforms, women are interested in three
to fifteen percent of male profiles.
Speaker 7 (39:17):
On Distill, women are interested in over half the male
profiles they see because we give.
Speaker 8 (39:21):
You high quality profiles and we give you more information
the information you want to see. So men are having
a better success rate and women are seeing better quality.
Speaker 7 (39:30):
So I think it's a one when Yeah, personally.
Speaker 4 (39:32):
That girl you just put a bow on that That
is amazing, that is that's perfect.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
That is yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:38):
How So in terms of the kind of questions like
are you looking more immediate dating meeting or like more
long term, because if you're thinking about your psychology majors,
you've gotta know how it works when you get married.
A little known secret is you basically married the whole family? Oh,
you're marrying everybody? That like, if you're not careful about
(39:59):
who you like, what's the what's the dynamic?
Speaker 2 (40:02):
I don't know, why are you looking at me?
Speaker 1 (40:05):
I guess i'd heard, but I'm not looking at you.
And that's just that's just that's just true. So how
deep are these do these questions get more extensive?
Speaker 4 (40:16):
Like do they talk about family? Do they talk about
their siblings? Do they talk about family life? Like your
mom says the best thing you can do is to
love your family. Which, by the way, Jennifer, that's beautiful.
Speaker 1 (40:27):
That is you know what we've been asking for.
Speaker 5 (40:30):
I can't take any credit for that. That is a
quote from mother Teresa.
Speaker 2 (40:34):
I don't care where it came from, but you're teaching
your kids that. Yeah, so you should have taken.
Speaker 1 (40:40):
Credit for it. Nobody would have known. But just even
more a bigger picture, you know, how much are you
really learning? Like if you learned, are you keeping in mind?
They're like, what are what's our relationship? Because I know
as a as a mom of two boys. Mothers of
boys are very protective throughout their lives and might be
(41:00):
quite opinionated about their future spouse or whatever and could
be very involved. Not that I will be.
Speaker 2 (41:06):
I will be very not at all money easy to.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
Get along with, ye, But I mean do you put
that in their mind to like, Okay, what's your relationship
with your mother, what's your relationship with your father? What's
your like? Do you get into more things that actually
could long term? I mean you're getting them to meet
each other initially and get to know each other, but
to a put in their mind when I do meet
(41:27):
this person, maybe I should right be careful? How you know?
I when I am introduced to the in law, potential
in laws or whatever, what that looks like?
Speaker 2 (41:37):
Yeah? What do you think? Sid?
Speaker 8 (41:40):
So we do try and keep some of our questions
a little bit more open ended, but we do actually
have a question that very specifically targets tell us about
your childhood in your early life, like were you very
close with your family? Is that a core value for you?
Were you very emotionally tied to your hometown? Did you
move around a lot? So we do encourage people to
talk about that in general, and we want to give
(42:01):
people space to, like, if they want to talk about
one thing more than something else, like, that's their prerogative
to do so. And I do think using voice AI
to do these onboarding processes will get even better at that.
But yes, we do ask people one tell us about
what you want in general in a partner, and we
give some examples of like values like substance use, like politics,
(42:23):
things like that, and a big thing people often use
that space to talk about is future family planning, like
do you want to get married, do you want to
have kids?
Speaker 7 (42:31):
Do you want your parents involved?
Speaker 8 (42:32):
Like I see a lot of people use it for that,
but also your childhood, like people often talk about their
relationship with their parents and if they had a lot
of siblings and what that was like. So yes, that's
definitely something that is seen a lot on the app.
Speaker 2 (42:44):
Well that's key.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah, Well it's interesting to do because you all are psychologists,
so you can look into those things that are so important. Constanza,
I feel like you have another question over there.
Speaker 10 (42:57):
I mean, I'm ruin over here, King and you.
Speaker 4 (43:02):
You have I mean, this may be how your daughter
dates when you know what I mean and how it
happens for her, you have the whole I said, this
may be how it your daughter dates in the future,
and how it's going to happen for her.
Speaker 10 (43:15):
Yeah, so no, absolutely absolutely. I mean, listen, we all
hope that you know she she makes the right decision,
whether or not it's with an app or without an app.
But I feel like you know, by the time that
she's that she's ready to to take that step forward,
that everything will be bunted up a I will will
know exactly what it's doing. I just what I don't
want is that human connection to get lost within the pross.
(43:39):
I've had my fair share of bad boyfriends and good
boyfriend I know Mi I will have you know her
breakups and and heartbreaks. But that human connection is so important.
And sometimes, you know, you meet somebody and you fall
completely in love without even speaking.
Speaker 7 (43:54):
To each other.
Speaker 10 (43:55):
So yeah, I'm interested, I'm curious. I'm excited about this
for the future. It's the future's bread for you, Sydney,
so very very exciting stuff.
Speaker 7 (44:03):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 8 (44:05):
Yeah, And I love I love that you're focused on
that because that's obviously such a critical element. And I
wouldn't be doing what we're doing if human connection wasn't
such a critical part of it. So one thing I'll
mention really briefly with dating apps, and someone mentioned one
of my badizers mentioned this to me, and I thought
it was such a good quote, is that it feels
like a video game, Like it's like how many matches
can I get? How many points can I rack up?
Like how many inbound messages can I get? And like
(44:27):
that's the opposite of human connection. That's the commodification of people.
That's what we want to get away from. And I
think what's like, like I mentioned earlier, like the goal
of a dating profile be quote unquote successful is to
be generalizable to as many people as possible. And that's
the exact opposite of what we want you to do.
Speaker 7 (44:43):
On distill.
Speaker 8 (44:43):
We want you to be specific, a niche to what
you want and who you are, be as authentic as
you can so we can give you the most authentic connection,
and then from there we want you to go on
that date, because you don't really know until you see
that person in person, and then it's you have that
connection or you don't. And generally, if everyone is being
safe and we have safety features built in. There's it's
(45:04):
always great to go on that date because you learn
more about yourself for it. You'd be like, wow, I
thought this is someone that I wanted, turns out it's not,
or vice versa, like I really wasn't sure about this
going in. Oh my gosh, she's amazing. She's amazing whoever,
but I do think that is so important. So getting
people to go not just on dates, but on dates
that are highly likely to convert to a second and
(45:25):
third and wife or husband.
Speaker 1 (45:27):
So, yeah, can you meet.
Speaker 7 (45:28):
Each other voice notes?
Speaker 10 (45:30):
Is it something that if they chose to communicate and
maybe ta get a little bit, is that's on the my
ahead and hear their voice?
Speaker 2 (45:35):
Is that a possibility?
Speaker 8 (45:36):
So for the beta as of right now, no, but
for the app, yes, that is something we want to do.
So like, the way it would work is basically, your
agent recommends people.
Speaker 7 (45:44):
You say you're interested.
Speaker 8 (45:45):
If the other person alsoys they're interested in you, then
you go to a human to human chat in which
you could send voice notes, send messages, pictures, whatever, and
then decide if you want to meet up in person.
Speaker 1 (45:55):
What sha real quick that you mentioned safety? Can you
just mention that really quick, because I know a lot
of the reasons women are getting off of swhite basis
because they still don't feel like they're it's safe, They're
they're really worried about that.
Speaker 8 (46:07):
So yes, so a big thing that what we're able
to do with AIS you can kind of get a
sense for someone is the other online very public online presence.
Speaker 7 (46:15):
So one, we can look at the photos you submit.
Speaker 8 (46:17):
And tell with the high de group of confidence if
they're AI generated or not, because that's going to continue
to be an issue. It's going to be a greater
issue as time goes on, unfortunately. And also we can
say like, okay, you gave me these number of these
stats about you, like we can just do a broad based,
very public information search and be like we are ninety
percent sure or higher that you are who you say
you are, and even things like we're deciding if we
(46:39):
want to go through with this, but like if you
lie about your height, we can kind of tell from
your photos like as an.
Speaker 2 (46:46):
Age, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 8 (46:48):
So when it found you, and we do want to
make sure this is a like exclusive community, like this
is a community of people that are here for the
right reasons and putting checks in place to make sure that.
Speaker 9 (46:59):
That is the case.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
Well, look correct me if I'm wrong, Sydney.
Speaker 4 (47:02):
But this feels really nice because it's a little bit
like the old fashioned way of meeting someone with a
modern twist and going together with technology as we evolve.
Speaker 8 (47:14):
Yes, no, yes, yes, yeah, we want to mimic how
people behave in real life dating, but use the benefit
of an online platform, which really just expands the community
available to you. So that's the benefit online dating, taking
away all the negative things that it's kind of turned
into in terms of the video gamification i'll call it of.
Speaker 7 (47:34):
Modern dating apps.
Speaker 1 (47:36):
Well, and that's also the all part of social media too,
because when you mentioned that it's how many you know
people say that I like you. It's the same thing
in social on Instagram or TikTok. You're looking how many
likes did I get? How many followers do I have?
But you think at that mindset, So, but you want
this to be You're trying to meet one person, not
say that I have a fan club of people that
decided that.
Speaker 2 (47:56):
Yeah, that sounds exhausting.
Speaker 4 (47:57):
Dating should be if it is enhances your life and
not exhausting, because really, a really good deep relationship should
be something that is like nice to have, not something
that you're like, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
I feel like it needs to complete, like it's a
job too, right, right, right? So I love it. Where
does Sam fit in the picture of distill? Please spill?
Is he signed up yet?
Speaker 7 (48:24):
Sorry?
Speaker 2 (48:24):
I repeat that when we're your brother? Has he signed
up yet?
Speaker 7 (48:28):
He has signed up?
Speaker 2 (48:29):
Okay?
Speaker 8 (48:30):
I did not to know that a cute girl likes
him on it and I'm trying to bug get back
to her. Oh he's busy.
Speaker 7 (48:37):
He just moved into school.
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Yes, Oh well, that's my last question. So if that happens,
so cute girl likes you and you say that, do
you you put a bug in their other person's ear
because they have to just both decide they like each other.
Speaker 8 (48:51):
Do you So I will ever reveal that this specific
person likes anyone specific person, you would have an indification
that goes out. So someone on the platform is shown
interest in you, make sure to check back in and
if you're interested in anyone, indicate that.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
Okay, And then of.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Course, so it's connect you some kind of yes, no
maybe situation.
Speaker 4 (49:13):
Like when that happens and they connect someone on the
platform has shown interest in you, is it like yesno,
maybe I'll go out with them, or how does that?
Speaker 2 (49:22):
I mean yes?
Speaker 8 (49:24):
So actually, something that we're doing that's a little bit
different than you'd see on other dating apps is you
can choose to say yes, no, or maybe to someone,
but you would also say like I do or don't
want be connected. So you could say maybe, but I
want to be connected, or yes, but I don't want
to be connected, and that just could be like you
are interested in checking it out your traveling, so you're
not in the right place to go on a date,
(49:44):
but you still want the app to learn and get better.
And I do think this maybe is kind of critical
because having a forced choice on dating products, like there's
a big difference between someone that's a ninety five percent
no and a sixty percent no, right, So having a
way to kind of capch for that information is really
helpful because I know that, I mean I have I've
had to try out all these apps just to see
(50:05):
my competitive landscape, and sometimes it's like how fast can
I swipe away?
Speaker 3 (50:10):
Versus a okay, thinking about yeah, what do you want
us to know as moms about this dating app, like
or in dating in general, Like I've I'm down with.
Speaker 4 (50:23):
I've learned situationship. I've learned exclusive, you know, exclusive, and
then apparently you have to go out to dinner and
ask someone to be your girlfriend or boyfriend.
Speaker 1 (50:33):
I also learned the other day that just the boyfriend
girlfriend thing does not mean that we should start planning
the wedding because when I mentioned to those boys, oh,
are they getting married?
Speaker 2 (50:41):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (50:43):
Married?
Speaker 2 (50:44):
Yeah? So what do you want us to know?
Speaker 3 (50:46):
Like?
Speaker 2 (50:46):
Teaches something? So I don't stick my foot in my
mouth today.
Speaker 8 (50:50):
Absolutely, I mean, I think the biggest thing, and what
we've all kind of seen is dating is such an
evolving landscape and there's so many trends, and yes, some
of them are kind of clickbait, like Shrekking. I don't
know if you guys have heard of that.
Speaker 2 (51:00):
I have no idea what you're talking about. You know
the movie? Yeah, I do.
Speaker 8 (51:05):
Basically, shrekking is when you date someone that's standing down,
not attracted as.
Speaker 7 (51:09):
You because you're settling. So that's a fun little daytak
to Georgia why she didn't teach this way, but there is.
It's a lot of noise in just dating in general.
Speaker 8 (51:19):
It's like, oh, dress this way, dressed that way like
or act this way or say this line like it's
so much noise and clutter. But we're trying to do
is just make it a simplistic, minimalistic process, like I
know who I am, what I want. Maybe your agent
can help you clarify that even further through like learning
about yourself on the app and find you an amazing
(51:41):
person and spend less time on the app, not more.
We're not trying to increase daily active users. We're trying
to increase amazing data.
Speaker 1 (51:49):
People out there having great dates.
Speaker 2 (51:50):
Well is filtering?
Speaker 1 (51:52):
I love it? I love it so Sydney. Where did
they find Where does the our audience find you on
social media? Or how they sign their children up for
distill or whatever they choo get signed up.
Speaker 12 (52:08):
Lisa on both talking, Instagram at Distill dot Dating and
you can go to distill dating dot com to sign
up for the beta access code is curate.
Speaker 8 (52:24):
But native app will be coming out very very soon.
So some cities to start getting excited for Dallas, Austin, Miami,
s f Chicago, Nashville, all start getting excited because we're
coming to your.
Speaker 2 (52:36):
City possible launch.
Speaker 1 (52:38):
Please say so much city, Thanks.
Speaker 2 (52:39):
For spilling the tea on that one.
Speaker 1 (52:41):
Yeah, speaking of launch cities, that just segues right, we're
doing we are doing Mom's Club events in cities across
the country where you'll see us in Nashville, Atlanta, Dallas,
We're going to be all over the place. So moms,
you can bring your mom tarage of friends together and
we will commiserate and we'll all talk about our kids dating.
Speaker 2 (53:04):
Like okay, ed you that.
Speaker 1 (53:06):
Yeah, see now I know what Shreking was. Now you'll know,
and so it will sound really important and like we
know what we're talking about. So, yeah, this is exciting.
So Mom's check out check that out. Also, if you
want to be a zoomer mom like the moms that
you saw on this show, please go to our website
at inside the Mom's Club dot com and there is
a button you can hit and go and submit a form,
(53:26):
put a little video up, and we may call you
to be a zoomer mom on our show. You can
also find us on all the social media platforms at
Inside the Mom's Club. And we would also like to
thank our sponsor, New Calm. If you put the words
Mom's Club in the code at checkout, you'll get fifteen
percent off every month of your subscription. It is well
(53:47):
worth it. We would not be sitting here today, or
at least Julie would not be sitting here.
Speaker 4 (53:53):
Today if it would be a little bit more grumpy,
that's what it would be. Yeah, it helps, maybe not
as kind.
Speaker 1 (53:58):
Complete better and it really does work. Deep sleep. I
slept great last night because I had deep Yes, you did,
I did. I overrode all the snoring that was going
on in the room that we were.
Speaker 7 (54:10):
Yeah, it's great.
Speaker 1 (54:13):
As always, this show goes by so fast. I'm sorry
to see it in another episode. Must and and make
way for the next episodes. And well, first of all,
don't forget if you don't laugh, sometimes you're gonna cry.
Say that every day, remind yourself of that, and then
we will see you next time. Inside the Mom's Club. Hi,
(54:47):
welcome to inside the Mom's Club, where being a mom
is the coolest place to be. Here in the Mom's Club,
we believe that what embarrasses you now will make a.
Speaker 2 (54:56):
Great story later.
Speaker 1 (54:57):
And let's face it, you don't laugh, sometimes you're gonna cry.
Join us in having a good laugh together. I'm Monica Samuels.
You are now inside the Mom's Club. Your private destination
for all things Mom.
Speaker 7 (55:12):
Think you saying they're running spect me
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