Did standup comedy kill cancel culture?

This podcast edition of Kenny Webster's Pursuit of Happiness features comedian Jesse Peyton. ( @KennethRWebster )

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Jack Guan, Government sucks. Suit of Happiness Radio is d Us.
Liberty and Freedom will make you smile. A suit of
Happing and Us on your radio to ale justice, cheeseburgers,
a libery Rise at Food.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
A new documentary about RFK Junior debuted last night. It's
called Gone with the Worm. Don't laugh at that, Hi,
I'm Kenny Webs. There's gonna be a lot of bad
jokes on today's show. Jesse Peyton's stopping by. He's one
of my best buddies. He's a stand up comedian. I
think he's one of the funniest people on earth. And
some of you, most of you think he's funny too,
some of you think he's real offensive. So if you're
one of those people that's ever mildly offensive offended by

(00:44):
today's show, I mean, if you're ever mildly offended by
the show at all, I think today is probably not
a good day for you to be here. But for
the rest of you stick around. It's gonna be a
lot of fun. Now, with all that in mind, before
we get to Jesse Peyton and news about Jeffrey Epstein
and Luigimingioni and so much other stuff. Let's talk about
what is really upsetting the liberals today. Donald Trump has
done something that is angered Democrats so much. They are

(01:07):
they are, they are bothered to their very core today
because Donald Trump is.

Speaker 3 (01:13):
Renovating the White House.

Speaker 2 (01:14):
That's right, the most Nazi thing you could do, right
above invading Poland a step obviously the Holocaust was bad,
but a close second, I'm sure we all agree, is
renovating the White House. Breitbart's got this whole story today
about Democrats and their allies and the regime media desperate
to lay a glove on an ascendant to President Trump,

(01:35):
so desperate in fact, they are actually accusing him, falsely obviously,
of destroying the White House. Everyone knows all he's doing
is adding a ballroom, and the ballroom isn't even costing
taxpayers a single penny. It's privately funded everything. Lunatics on
the left have hurled to try to kill Trump as
a political force, and literally tried to kill Trump. I

(01:56):
mean literally, I know people misuse that word. I mean
literally tried to kill Trump. It all failed. They tried
to frame him as a Russian spy. They twice impeached
him over nonsense. They tried to throw him in prison
and bankrupt business. They called him a racist, they called
him a Nazi, and on two different occasions they tried
to shoot him with a gun and it all failed.

Speaker 3 (02:15):
Everything. So now.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
So now they're reduced to utter nonsense, talk about desperate,
talk about demoralized.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
The same Democrats, the same media that once.

Speaker 2 (02:27):
Had the full power of the deep state working to
destroy mega are such failed eunuchs. Now all they could
do is throw their own feces on Twitter. Hillary Clinton,
probably the last person on earth that should be making
these comments, took to Twitter with a screenshot of the
White House news story about the ballroom being renovated and said,
it's not his.

Speaker 3 (02:47):
House, it's our house, and you're destroying it.

Speaker 2 (02:50):
Here is a clip from MSNBC's Morning Shows.

Speaker 4 (02:54):
It's Donald Trump, who promised that he was not going
to take a wrecking ball to the existing structure, has
taking a wrecking ball to existing structure.

Speaker 3 (03:03):
I got to say, make it really is. It's it is.

Speaker 4 (03:06):
It is hard to watch that, and it's hard to
believe that any president could destroy the White House and
take a wrecking ball to an existing structure so historic.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
That is what stop it right here. Kevin Newsom Joe Scarborough.
Here's an actual headline. This is from Yahoo News headline
at the White House, Trump's destructive impulses take a literal
turn literal. Here's the truth, which includes important contexts. The
liars don't want you to know a lot of fake
outrage over construction of the big, beautiful, and privately funded

(03:40):
White House ballroom. Presidents have been renovating and expanding the
White House for over a century. Theodore Roosevelt built the
West Wing. Did you know that it wasn't originally part
of it?

Speaker 3 (03:51):
He built it? That had been in nineteen oh two.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
In nineteen oh nine, William Howard Taft added the first
Oval office during a West Wing expansion.

Speaker 3 (03:59):
Did you know what originally there? Did you know?

Speaker 2 (04:01):
In nineteen ninety three, Franklin D. Roosevelt added a second
floor to the West Wing. In nineteen thirty four, he
relocated the Oval office to its current spot, completed the
East wing, even built an indoor swimming pool. And then
the nineteen forties rolled around. That's when President Harry Truman
began completely gutting and building the White House interior, preserving

(04:22):
only the exterior walls. In nineteen seventy, Dick Nixon converted
FDR's pool into the press briefing room. In nineteen seventy three,
he added a bowling alley in the basement. And then
in two thousand and nine, and this is important because
this is one of the people out there that they're
trying to rile up and get upset, President Obama upgraded

(04:42):
the tennis court into a full basketball court. Now, in
twenty twenty five, Trump has broken ground on a ballroom
modernizing the West Wing. It's going to be okay. It's
gonna be fine. The taxpayers aren't even paying for it.
But let's go back to the thing with Hillary Clinton.
When the Clintons left the White House, they did something
like seventy thousand dollars worth of vandalism, damage, destroyed historic furniture,

(05:06):
even stole things.

Speaker 3 (05:09):
So it's gonna be okay.

Speaker 2 (05:10):
Trump has so effectively castrated Democrats they're humiliating themselves by
lying and suggesting he's destroying the White House. All they've
got left is to point at a construction project and
scream about how Trump is tearing down the White House.
Trump has turned his opposition into Gerbils. You almost pity them,
don't you.

Speaker 5 (05:30):
Some radio shows are so hot you'll literally burn your eyes.

Speaker 3 (05:36):
Fortunately, this is it one of those shows I feel
never listen to read you all a year, But Shuit
of Happiness Radio.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
All Right, Today's National Nut Day, or as Jesse knows it, Wednesday.
Wednesday's right, oh day. I knew you would know it,
did I knew you would know what to do with that. Hey,
we're live in studio right now. We're also live streaming.
It's obvious we're live because that's why you're hearing us.
But I'm Kenny Webster.

Speaker 5 (06:03):
It is.

Speaker 3 (06:03):
It's Wednesday, and.

Speaker 2 (06:04):
I got my buddy Jesse Payne here, one of the
probably one of the funniest people on earth, certainly the
funniest guy I know.

Speaker 3 (06:10):
And Jesse.

Speaker 2 (06:10):
You know, they say, according to a report out today,
that Halloween is the loneliest day of the year to
be single.

Speaker 3 (06:17):
Do you believe that? Absolutely? Yeah, of course no. You
know why.

Speaker 5 (06:22):
It's because you don't have a boo pro comedy baby.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
People are gonna think we planned that, but we did not. Oh,
we would not have planned that.

Speaker 3 (06:32):
Absolutely. If we were planning the show today, I would
have said I would have mixed that.

Speaker 2 (06:36):
Now, the Halloween is the loneliest day of the year
to be single, they say, which is why Halloween is
the most popular day of the year to adopt a
cat apparently, which is I.

Speaker 5 (06:45):
Think the most the loneliest day to be single is
net National net Day's Bank You.

Speaker 2 (06:52):
The thing about Halloween, though, is it is like on
Halloween there are a lot of young women and older
women any age woman really who wears an outfit that's
like two sizes too tight. It doesn't fit right there.
They have cleavage all over the place. There's folds and things,
and there's alcohol, a lot of alcohol and sugar. Yea,
I gotta think if you're single, Halloween's great or am

(07:13):
I just not?

Speaker 3 (07:14):
And well, that's true.

Speaker 5 (07:15):
I like the analogy for Halloween though, when they when
they dress provocatively, they say promiscuous women don't get cold.

Speaker 3 (07:22):
Have you heard that?

Speaker 5 (07:23):
But they don't say promiscuous women but for the sake
of being being absoutec compliant. Yes, absolutely, you could say horrish,
Oh horsh horrish women. Horsh is a fun part and
I want to make I want to make it abundantly clear.

Speaker 3 (07:36):
I'm not putting them down.

Speaker 5 (07:37):
Some of my favorite women on the planet happened to
be promiscuous?

Speaker 3 (07:42):
Isn't that a norm McDonald bit?

Speaker 2 (07:44):
He's like, you know the problem with slut shaming guys,
And here's what I'm worried about is if we shame
all the sluts, they might not be slutty anymore.

Speaker 5 (07:52):
And then that's what I used to lead in with
a bit where I would start with that. I was like,
why do we we only do it for women?

Speaker 1 (07:57):
Right?

Speaker 3 (07:57):
Because if a guy is a.

Speaker 5 (07:58):
Player, or him a ladies man or a pimp, you know,
it has words of like edification. But when women do it,
we put him down. Why do we put women down
for doing the very thing we want them to do?

Speaker 2 (08:09):
It is a tale as old as time, Jesse. If
I knew the answer, I don't know the answer. I
do know this, though, Can I talk about some of
your biggest mistakes in life?

Speaker 3 (08:17):
Can we start the show with that?

Speaker 5 (08:18):
H I thought this was only a ten hour segment.
We're gonna need more time, Kenny.

Speaker 2 (08:22):
A court filing has put some meat on the bones
of a case against a corrections officer just arrested for
they always say allegedly in the report, he was arrested
for smuggling chicken wings into a Texas lockup. Now, I'm
sure you see where this is going, but I'll do
it anyway. A Travis County jail official was monitoring an

(08:43):
inmate's phone calls on an unrelated incident when the man
told a relative that a corrections officer had provided him
with chicken wings after he sent the officer money on
the cash app. Specifically, the inmates said that the officer
had agreed to supply him with Hobbin yarrow mango chicken
wings from Wingstop. He gave him fifty bucks, which is
pretty good, you know, ready to return on that ROI.

(09:03):
A subsequent review of jail surveillance video showed the food
delivery arriving at the Travis County Correction Complex twenty three
hundred in campus in the suburb of Austin. Over there.
You've probably heard of this place before. So the paper
bag was run through an X ray scanner and they
pick up the bag and then they the guy eats
a wing himself, so they're like, oh, it's his wings.

Speaker 3 (09:22):
It's fine.

Speaker 2 (09:23):
Then he brings it in and he gives it to
the inmate. The court filings do not identify the inmate,
not like it matters.

Speaker 3 (09:28):
But uh, you I am told have a yeah. Don't
you have some experience with this? Jesse y.

Speaker 5 (09:33):
I was incarcerated too, and it was funny. The things
that we would ask the guards to smuggle in were
never hot wings. But I will say this, there were
black people in there, so this doesn't surprise me.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
There are black people in jail. Yes, I had.

Speaker 5 (09:47):
Hey, I can bring you anything from the outside world
that you missed. Would you like drugs, tobacco or alcohol?

Speaker 3 (09:53):
Nah?

Speaker 5 (09:54):
Go buy wingstop and get some mango hob Andero Ford Quante.

Speaker 3 (10:00):
To Quante, How did you know? His name was? Ron Trelon?
To Quante was never he would never be involved in this.
He's a vegan.

Speaker 2 (10:07):
I what's the weirdest thing that ever got snuck into
prison while you were there?

Speaker 1 (10:10):
Uh?

Speaker 3 (10:13):
Nothing weird that I knew. I mean, but we did.

Speaker 5 (10:15):
They did do the cell phones and you know, tobacco
and marijuana and stuff like that, so nothing crazy. Cell
phones were popular because you could have connections with the
outside world.

Speaker 2 (10:25):
Now for people that are new to you or they
don't know you, I'll just go ahead and let him
know right now.

Speaker 3 (10:29):
Jesse was arrested back in the two thousands for nineties
in the nineties. I'm an old man, that's right.

Speaker 2 (10:34):
And it was a napster thing, right when didn't Metallica
and a radio head, they came after you for illegal
music downloading.

Speaker 5 (10:41):
Yeah, that's exactly what it was for Kenny, for the
FC to be SCC compliant.

Speaker 2 (10:45):
We'll stay with that. No nobody cares. I think you've
told the story on the air before. It was I
it wasn't napster. No, it wasn't, it was I was.
It was a pirate. It was a pirate, a different,
different felony. And for okay, well I'm man. Note So anyway,
don't sneak wingstop into the Travis County jail or you
will get caught. Now the guard has become the guarded,

(11:07):
if you will. And on that note, Jesse, my favorite
newspaper is The New York Post.

Speaker 3 (11:12):
I love it. I'm obsessed at the New York Post.

Speaker 2 (11:15):
And one of my favorite inmates probably from the last decade.

Speaker 3 (11:19):
Well news stories about an inmate. It's not like I
like them.

Speaker 2 (11:22):
Jeffrey Epstein's former Upper East Side mansion has undergone a
massive renovation.

Speaker 3 (11:30):
It was at one time.

Speaker 2 (11:31):
Let me put this up on the screen because I
want people watching on social media to see what we're
looking at. At one time, this was I think considered
to be the largest residence, single occupancy residence.

Speaker 3 (11:42):
On the island of Manhattan. Wow.

Speaker 2 (11:44):
Now the problem with it is as nice as this
real estate is, teenage girls got raped there.

Speaker 3 (11:51):
So you know, what would you pay for? That would
be my question for you. I don't know.

Speaker 5 (11:55):
I just would make sure that they went through before
they renovated it, that they went through with the.

Speaker 3 (11:58):
Black light to make sure it was cleaned properly.

Speaker 2 (12:01):
Did you hear the Morning show today Steve and I
and Billy admitde the same point. Billy, I think Billy
d said after they went through it with a black light,
the building was throbbing. If I'm not mixed, Wow, that's tremendous. Okay,
So they did a nine hundred and twenty five thousand
dollars renovation, all right, I think it says it was
at least nine hundred twenty five thousand dollars for the renovation, or.

Speaker 5 (12:21):
As Epstein calls it, four massages and anyway.

Speaker 2 (12:27):
So apparently someone bought this historic holumn for fifty one
million dollars back in twenty twenty one. Now here's the
hook line and sinker, here's a catch for you. This
house Jesse was eighty eight million dollars. Wow, but because
children were raped in it, they didn't get quite as
much money as they wanted.

Speaker 3 (12:48):
Surprise, surprise, And that's yeah, that's wild.

Speaker 2 (12:51):
As a guy who is good at what's the word
I'm looking for negotiating a deal?

Speaker 3 (13:00):
Would you?

Speaker 5 (13:01):
You know what's funny is about real estate is they
have to always disclose when someone was killed at the house,
and then I know they would weigh rather that, like, hey,
did anybody die in this house? Uh no, but I'm
gonna need you to sit down for this one.

Speaker 2 (13:16):
Well no, don't sit there. That's where kids were raped. Well,
good news bad news on this. Do you like celebrities? Yeah,
I guess it, because some very famous people were in
this house. Now that's the good news. The bad news
is wasn't a pop star necessarily? Somebody did get popped apparently,
and uh boy, look at that. There's Virginia Geoffrey with
Prince Andrew. Isn't that crazy to think the royal family.

(13:39):
I know this is old news. We've known this for years.
It's still amazing. Prince Andrew was only recently stripped of
his royal title, and all he had to do was
rape a teenage girl over a decade ago.

Speaker 3 (13:50):
It's crazy. I thought his name was Prince Albert. Yes,
that's the guy.

Speaker 2 (13:55):
The thing that I always thought was interesting about Well,
we call her Jiz laying maxwell in the backyard, coucking
in the background.

Speaker 3 (14:01):
Is at some.

Speaker 2 (14:02):
Point, yes, Jesse, at some point this was you know,
it was Epstein's madam, but they also had a relationship
with each other. I never thought she seemed like he
was his she's his type, right, Yeah, you know she's
not a teenage girl.

Speaker 5 (14:17):
Yeah, but I mean when you go fishing, the bait
you use is what you're trying to catch either, and.

Speaker 3 (14:24):
That's why you do this for a living. Is it
absolutely all right? Jess.

Speaker 2 (14:27):
We're live in studio right now, Jesse Peyton is here.
If you're not offended by what you have just heard,
we'll stick around. We got time.

Speaker 6 (14:37):
We're not passive aggressive like some people. We know this
is Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness.

Speaker 2 (14:45):
Jane Cadell's cause of death was according to a new
report this was just released, it was cardiac arrest. Don't
bother her coworkers right now, it's hard out there for
a chimp.

Speaker 5 (15:00):
I'm never booking you a game kiduse you're never getting
on stage with me again.

Speaker 3 (15:04):
All right? Our alternative take on it?

Speaker 2 (15:05):
Okay, Jane Goodell's cause of death was cardiac arrest.

Speaker 3 (15:09):
It was just release the information, just released, Jesse.

Speaker 2 (15:12):
She could have been saved, but instead of going to
the hospital, she decided to monkey around. Virginia Geoffrey's ghost writer,
I guess we're done with Epstein. We'll talk about something else. Oh,
this is fascinating. Okay, Luigi and Gione, I don't have
to explain who that is. We all get who Luigi is, right, absolutely,
Louis Mario's buddy. Yes, Luigi and GIONI, as you know
is well. Isn't an interesting like him? And Zorhan Mom

(15:35):
Donnie are both these rich millionaire kids who are hardcore
communist revolutionaries? Zorhan Mom Donnie and Luigi and Gione. That's
the wrong music.

Speaker 1 (15:47):
What are they?

Speaker 2 (15:47):
I was trying to get the Mario music. I'm sorry,
I'm playing Mariachi. I wanted wanted Mario.

Speaker 5 (15:53):
Try.

Speaker 2 (15:53):
Can I get a mulligan? Please give me a take
two on that one, is that all right? Can I
get a mulligan golf jokes?

Speaker 3 (15:58):
There we go? All right, Sorry, I'm mom. Donnie will
soon be in New York City mayor.

Speaker 2 (16:03):
And he may not seem like he has a lot
in common with Luigi Mangione, but he does. Both of
them are rich, globe trotting Marxists, and I this is
like my favorite story of the day. Luigi Mangione, six
months before murdering purportedly supposedly allegedly murdering United Healthcare CEO
Brian Thompson, took a backtrap packing trip through Asia like

(16:27):
rich kids often do. The twenty seven year old bragged
to friends over WhatsApp, the smartphone app, about his raucous
nightlife backpacking through Asia before he returned to the US
in July twenty twenty four, when he shot Brian Thompson.
Now In an eyebrow raising message, Mangione claimed he had
been beaten up by seven lady boys, transgender men, transgender women.

(16:49):
I guess they're trainees, a colloquial term for the trainees
in Bangkok, and he shared photos of the battered and
scratched arm. The Ivy League educated tech kids set up
off on a solo trip abroad in early twenty twenty four,
befriending a popular soccer player, apparently Christian Sacchini, like anyone
would know who that is, and another unidentified companion, and

(17:10):
according to Christian, who met Mangione at a bang popcock
pub in March, told the journalist the accused killer initially
talked about video games and Pokemon, before veering into a
rant about how fed up the US healthcare system is
compared to Thailand. Wouldn't you rather get your healthcare in
Thailand but in the United States, where it's just too expensive,

(17:32):
he said. The alleged killer eventually escaped to the lush
Mountain mount Omin Mountains in Japan, seeking a slower pace
and hoping to meditate and do some writing at a
serene hot spring, and there he shared a story about
how he was beaten up by seven lady boys in Thailand. Jesse,
we could only speculate. We have no idea. What do

(17:53):
you think he did to upset those lady boys.

Speaker 5 (17:55):
I'm just trying to figure out if Bangkok was the
city or a recapitulation of the events that transpired.

Speaker 2 (18:01):
The problem with cities in Thailand. Is they all kind
of sound dirty? And I'm not even sure if we
could explain why. I'll just tell you this. There's a
city in Thailand called Fu Cut, and there's that's like
the second biggest city in Thailand. The other biggest city
in Thailand is called Bangkok. Now it's not my fault
people go there on sex trips.

Speaker 5 (18:20):
I wouldn't it, But that's wild. He gets beat up
by seven lady boys. Bro, what do you think he did?
I think he couldn't afford his koga.

Speaker 3 (18:31):
One of two things, right, One of two things happened.

Speaker 2 (18:33):
Either he didn't pay them, or he figured out they
were dudes and he made fun of him or made
a joke and they all got mad at him, because
what else would there something? How do you upset all
seven of them? All seven of them beat the snot
out of this sky? Or I guess the third option
is that's his thing?

Speaker 5 (18:49):
Man? I uh yeah, that's that's crazy, because you know,
if I have a joke about getting beat up by
the seven Dwarfs, but you gotta be careful. Did you
get beat up by the seven trainies? It's gotta be
way worse.

Speaker 3 (19:01):
Gotta be much worse. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (19:02):
The thing I think a lot of people forget is
even though they're transgender women.

Speaker 3 (19:07):
There's still men. There's still men.

Speaker 5 (19:09):
They've got penises and testosterone and muscles, and you got
to see all of them.

Speaker 2 (19:14):
If anyone's really being honest about gay guys, heterosexual men,
they're like, oh, he's gay. I'd beat the crap out
of them. You probably wouldn't. Actually, gay guys can fight. Yeah, yeah,
gay guys are great at fighting because they'd been getting
bullied since they were little kids. They might look and
sound like they're a little soft, but actually most gay
guys have beat the crap.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
Out of you if you mess with them. That's right.

Speaker 5 (19:34):
And then Luigi was looking for his princess and found
out it was Yoshi.

Speaker 2 (19:39):
That's exactly what the hell happened. How do you think
he got a Lacroix while he was in Thailand? He
got beat up by a little boy. For those two,
For those of you, for those of you listening on
the radio, we're looking at a photo of Luigi on
the beach with a Lacroix with sparkling water.

Speaker 3 (19:57):
I hate to admitute I do like Lacroix. Does that
make me gay.

Speaker 5 (20:00):
He looks like a Meninda's brother a little bit. It's
not just me, No, you know, there's a look, there's
a vibe for people who just like to shoot people
in the face at point blank range.

Speaker 2 (20:09):
It's also interesting to me that people like the fact
that he they think it's they think he's sexy, and
I get it, he's not an ugly person. But but
they don't feel that way about the Charlie kirkuss Ashen, right.

Speaker 3 (20:21):
Even though both of them has a little tism. The
Charlie Kirk guy, he does well. I think most of
them do. Yeah, fair enough.

Speaker 2 (20:28):
I mean you have to be a little I mean
a little. I'm not saying that makes you homicidal.

Speaker 5 (20:34):
I'm just saying that the Vinn diagram is the larger
overlap thing you would assume.

Speaker 3 (20:38):
Oh and then the other thing is the transgender stuff.

Speaker 2 (20:41):
The autistic people are more likely statistically, We've been told,
of course, but did you see this report today.

Speaker 3 (20:47):
All the gender neutrals are going away gender?

Speaker 5 (20:50):
I don't think, Kenny, I don't think it's a shock
that the person with lipstick in her mustache is mentally unstable?
Is that?

Speaker 3 (20:57):
Thank you?

Speaker 2 (20:57):
I appreciate that there was a report today, the gender
neutral shift. There's a report out claiming even though for
the last several years there were like an absurdly large
number of cross dressing college and high school age kids,
it actually looks like.

Speaker 3 (21:11):
It was just a trend and now it's all going away.
They said.

Speaker 2 (21:13):
This year, this semester, you see men wearing pants again
and girls wearing skirts, and just like it was a
decade ago.

Speaker 5 (21:20):
You know what's funny is because my dad used to
gripe at me for sagging my pants in junior high.
And I'm gonna be like, hold on, dad, guess what
came next. Leah Tardzen snapcrotch panties. Dead could have been
wearing that. You worried about a little Calvin Klein elastic
boxer waistband hanging out to the top of my Genko

(21:41):
blue jeans. But at least I wasn't wearing Victoria's Secret
in Central Park where.

Speaker 2 (21:45):
You know what old like white conservative men like to
say is that the sagging of the pants originates from
gang culture and prison excuse me, prison culture. Obviously it
originates from gang culture. That the reason gang do that
is because they were putting out a call sign to
other men in prison, and that that's how it started.

(22:05):
But I always thought it started with skateboard culture in
southern California.

Speaker 3 (22:09):
I guess I don't know, do you want the truth
on that, because I know where it started.

Speaker 5 (22:12):
The truth on that was Impover's kids weren't able to
regularly buy clothes every season that they grew, so their
parents would buy them larger clothes so they could grow
into them. And the kids started wearing pants that were
larger than their actual size so they could grow into
it and you wouldn't have to buy them pants in
six months when they got bigger, and they instead of saying, hey,

(22:33):
this is what we do, it just was like, hey,
we popularized it.

Speaker 2 (22:36):
You don't think it had something to do. It's just
having a place to hide a gun.

Speaker 5 (22:39):
I don't, no, you do know things on because yeah,
that's that doesn't it's not a very prudent, you know,
especially if you're trying to if running from the cops
could be on your afternoon agenda. I don't think having
your pants around your knees is the best strategy.

Speaker 2 (22:52):
I read Vice News, which is basically like sixty Minutes
for Zoomers, and they had a headline I could not
ignore about a week ago, kids aren't identifying as non
binary anymore with a photo of five cross dressing college kids,
probably the ugliest people I've ever seen in my life.
If any of these people were still the right gender,
I couldn't imagine anybody watching this would be interested, right, Like,

(23:16):
so you gotta assume right away, like that's a girl,
that's a guy, that's a but they're still ugly.

Speaker 3 (23:21):
It looks like the cover of an R and B
band Girls to men.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
We're looking at. For those of you on the radio,
the photo in the article is inn't that interesting, Jesse,
It's almost like they're ugly.

Speaker 5 (23:33):
Well, I don't understand, because I believe in God, and
I believe we serve a God that doesn't make mistakes,
in which case, if that's the truth, then nobody was
born in the wrong body. And just because you're ugly,
just be ugly, right, that's it. Because no dude has
ever been a four as a guy in transition to
a girl and became an eight.

Speaker 3 (23:51):
No, now you're a three as a woman with lipstick
in your mustache. That's it, dude, That is it.

Speaker 1 (23:56):
Man.

Speaker 2 (23:56):
There is an article I think advice a while ago,
it was like none of mine famous non binary friends
can find can find love. And then it was a
photo of all these men with beards wearing ball guns.
I was like, well, yeah, you think I know why, because.

Speaker 5 (24:10):
Have you ever looked at, like, like a transgender person
and been like, Man, that dude was a six as
a as a dude, and now he's a tid.

Speaker 3 (24:19):
Now he's a dime as a female.

Speaker 5 (24:21):
What.

Speaker 2 (24:22):
Yeah, that doesn't work good the you transition, bro, You
know what will make you more attractive, The wrong kinds
of hormones being injected into you regularly.

Speaker 6 (24:32):
That all our doctor told us the pills we took
were just a placebo. But he must not know what
he's talking about, because man, those suckers worked. This is
Kenny Webster's pursuit of happiness.

Speaker 3 (24:48):
All right.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
A protester wearing a penis costume was arrested. The person
was at a No King's rally in Alabama dressed in
a phallic shaped out. Apparently she was unaware of her
state's penal coats. Give it up for gumby, al Right,
I got another one.

Speaker 3 (25:10):
This is terrible.

Speaker 2 (25:11):
Diddy P did you like P? Did he'd be keeping
up with the trials. Did he plans to appeal his conviction?
And he's definitely asking for a new courtroom?

Speaker 3 (25:18):
Artist, I'm waiting.

Speaker 5 (25:23):
I'm waiting for the renovations at the Diddy mansion like
they did at Epstein's mansion. Bro for real. I went
to an estate sale there. I got a baby oil
at a very significant discount.

Speaker 2 (25:34):
It's a good deal, you know, baby oil. I did
not know you could use baby oil for that.

Speaker 5 (25:39):
I did not know you could buy baby oil buy
the palette.

Speaker 3 (25:44):
Yeah, how long has that been going? Did you get
it in bulk? You must be cheaper. I was in prison.
I knew the baby oil thing.

Speaker 5 (25:49):
That's a very common thing, one of our Wait what Yeah,
but no, Black people use baby oil as like lotion,
like they lather with it.

Speaker 4 (25:56):
See.

Speaker 2 (25:56):
I think people are gonna hear that and assume you
mean something salacious.

Speaker 3 (25:59):
No, I'm not, don't. I mean they mean it very generically.
We are. I don't know.

Speaker 2 (26:03):
I always say he's my friend, but the truth is
he's more of a good acquaintance. I was at his wedding.
I like Tony Busby, one of the most famous lawyers
in America, won the trial of the century the Ken
Paxton impeachment trial against Drusty Harden. Tony has been representing
a lot of Diddy's purported alleged victims.

Speaker 3 (26:19):
I'll just call him victims. I don't care.

Speaker 2 (26:21):
And he says, he says did he ain't getting a pardon?
Pardon people thought he was gonna get pardoned by Trump.
He just sounds like he's not. But he is getting
lots of civil trials, lots of them, says Tony Busby,
and they can't come soon enough.

Speaker 3 (26:34):
I don't know. Why did he thought that Trump would
bail him out.

Speaker 2 (26:37):
He campaigned for Kamala, he campaign for Obama, he campaign
for Joe Biden.

Speaker 3 (26:42):
Why would he help? Why would Trump help him? I
don't even think that's the main reason. I think.

Speaker 5 (26:47):
Hey, Trump's like, bro, I'm trying to hide an Epstein list.
You think I'm gonna have an association with you? No, Hey,
I'm not on the Epstein list. Where were where were
you when the Epstein parties were going on?

Speaker 3 (27:01):
He's like, I was at Ditty's house.

Speaker 2 (27:04):
Doing hood wrecked up with my friend hood rat stuff
with my friends.

Speaker 3 (27:07):
Yes, thank you for saving yourself. There.

Speaker 2 (27:09):
Have you ever seen this video of Diddy behind the scenes.
I don't know if puff Daddy's on cocaine here, but
I'm pretty sure Barack Obamas, have you ever seen this video?

Speaker 3 (27:18):
Oh, I thought that's Diddy. I thought that was Michelle.

Speaker 2 (27:20):
No, no Jesse, no Jesse, that's Rat mogul p Diddy.
But he does look like the former first Lady.

Speaker 3 (27:28):
I get that.

Speaker 2 (27:29):
Here's Obama with puff Daddy back in the day when
Obama was new on the scene. Ask yourself this question
as you watch this video, are these two guys on drugs?

Speaker 1 (27:38):
Y'all?

Speaker 3 (27:39):
Thank you?

Speaker 2 (27:40):
And I just want to say how much I appreciate
puff Dad for doing the kinds of work that he's
doing because he doesn't have to do this, but this
is part of what is important about giving hus.

Speaker 3 (27:51):
We applaud you.

Speaker 5 (27:52):
And I want to apologize for not sweating, but I
do this so much.

Speaker 3 (27:57):
I'm so cool.

Speaker 5 (27:58):
I just want you to see everybody I'm in if
you in a sweat and I'm not even touching my brow.

Speaker 3 (28:02):
I'm so cool, and I want to apologize. I ain't
trying to make you a little bad like that, but
I'm just so cool.

Speaker 5 (28:09):
We we we we we t shirtda Zada he.

Speaker 2 (28:13):
Bus ponzit right, here are those two men on drugs?
Jesse one hundred percent? I think did he's on viagra?

Speaker 5 (28:19):
Though? Do you know how hard it is to do
an interview with the president with an erection?

Speaker 3 (28:25):
He's like, Obama, you don't know this that your mind type?

Speaker 2 (28:30):
How did ra Were you surprised when we all found
out that he had a gay side to him?

Speaker 3 (28:34):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (28:34):
And and to that point, not just puffed at you
like all the rappers were kind of gay, right?

Speaker 5 (28:40):
And its reaction formation, which is where you project the
opposite of what you inwardly think, and you're ashamed of what.

Speaker 2 (28:45):
You inwardly think, right right, Yes, and uh and you know,
I mean we everybody knows black people are specifically rappers
are the most homophobic people on the planets.

Speaker 5 (28:54):
So they are it's you know, everything is is you know,
gay is just it's an it's a a synonymous with
being bad and they're hiding it.

Speaker 3 (29:04):
And to know that all I was shocked.

Speaker 5 (29:05):
So to answer your question is I was blown away, meto.

Speaker 2 (29:09):
I was also blown away. That's the right word to use.
I wondered about this as well. Apparently, hang on while
I get the next story on my screen here. Okay,
here's a weird news story out of Florida today. Let
me get this other thing off the screen here. For
those of you watching us on social media, a Florida
woman contacted police earlier this month. This is such a
twenty first century problem to report a male assailant had

(29:34):
barged into her home, knocked her to the ground, and
then committed sexual assault. While the attacker was a stranger,
The woman said she was able to take a photo
of the suspect while he was seated on the couch
in her Saint Petersburg apartment. Multiple officers and forensic technicians
responded to the scene. A thirty two year old mother
of two was the victim of the October seventh attack,

(29:55):
but a subsequent police examination of the image provided by
the victim, bro Brookchenault, revealed that the photo is AI
generated via chat GPT, according to the arrest report. Additionally,
the photo was found in a deleted folder dated days
before she alleged the sexual battery took place. The woman,
Shanat or whatever her name is, was arrested for falsely

(30:18):
reporting a crime. She spent a night in jail before
posting one thousand dollars bond. Police court documents do not
include a motive for the bizarre incident, but nonetheless, women
have now found a new way or men to blame
men or accuse men of something they may not have done.
AI generated sexual assault videos.

Speaker 5 (30:38):
Jesse your reaction, Wow, that's I mean, I want to
make a joke about it, but that's actually terrifying and
that that could happen. But I think if you accuse
a man of doing something salacious like that and he
really didn't do it, I think you should be punished
to the same crime, to the same degree that his
maximum one hundred percent fence would have been.

Speaker 2 (30:55):
I've said that for years. Yeah, yeah, whatever, the crime
should be, right, whatever it is. If you try to
accuse someone a murder and not only can you not
only can it be proven that they didn't commit the murder,
but that you're trying to frame them for murder, you.

Speaker 5 (31:06):
Should be punished at the maximum degree of that crime,
at least at least a life sentence. You were trying
to take that person's life away, Right, we have to
take away the incentive to do something like that. And AI,
to me is pretty easy to identify. But here's what
makes me nervous.

Speaker 2 (31:22):
Not only can my mom and her elderly friends not
identify AI when confronted with it, some of my tech
savvy friends our age can't identify it.

Speaker 3 (31:31):
Does that make you nervous?

Speaker 1 (31:31):
No?

Speaker 5 (31:32):
I have a friend that she'll send me videos and
be like, look at this, and I'm like, that's AI.
It's fake. Oh And I was like, you're gullible. But
I mean she's an attractive friend, so you know that
works to minch.

Speaker 3 (31:43):
So it's okay that she's dumb. Yeah, I love dumb
girls are my favorite.

Speaker 2 (31:46):
When you meet a girl and you find out she
has daddy issues, are usually excited about that.

Speaker 3 (31:50):
Oh, that's my favorite thing. In fact, that's a prereg
for me and any girl. It's daddy issues, latex allergy,
and a low self esteem. Is that right? I posted
one of these recently.

Speaker 2 (31:59):
I post did an AI generated video recently of a
large obese woman being lifted out of a lazy boy
chair in a uh in a crane and then suddenly,
as this is happening the here, I've got it on
the screen here so we can watch it in the live.

Speaker 3 (32:14):
Streams okay, man just keeps still almost.

Speaker 2 (32:20):
And then and then the floor gives out and they
all land in the basement. Now, to me, it was
obvious that this was AI. I'm sorry, I don't even
have it on the computer screen. Here, we'll watch it
one more time. To me, it was obvious that this
was AI. But some of our listeners were like upset
that we posted this. I just thought it was a
funny video. Isn't this obviously AI? I mean, look at
how thin the floor is. It's clearly not real.

Speaker 5 (32:42):
Yeah, I mean, if it was real, she would have
a black boyfriend in the background on the couch.

Speaker 3 (32:46):
No, Jesse, No, no, just that.

Speaker 2 (32:50):
But but black guys do tend to like larger size
women than white men do, statistically speaking, that's what I
was speaking on.

Speaker 3 (32:57):
Obvious.

Speaker 2 (32:58):
Obviously, that's what's very fact based in my commed. Obviously,
that's what he meant by that, Jesse, you're a comedian.
What do you enjoy? Eddie Murphy? He's on the Mount
Rushmore on the route.

Speaker 5 (33:10):
He's on a lot of people's Mount Rushmore, and I
concur who else is on yours? Mine's weird. I like
Bernie Mack. I love Bernie Mack, huge Bernie Mack fan.
I like Jim Jefferies is up there, really, Jim Jefferies.

Speaker 2 (33:22):
I love Jim Jefferies, Dave Chappelle, Doug Stanhope, Newer Comics,
Ryan Long, Jeff Dye.

Speaker 5 (33:28):
You know, I like those, the last two. Not a
huge fans of the first ones. I don't like Chappelle,
I do. I'm not a huge Chappelle fan. I mean
relative to his his acumen for and how high people listen.

Speaker 2 (33:39):
To that after the racist thing you just said, don't
you feel bad saying you don't like Dave Chappelle.

Speaker 5 (33:43):
No, because Bernie Mack's up there. That's what I do
that I have to put one leg good on.

Speaker 3 (33:46):
The mountain point. But you've also got Eddie Murphy on it.
And I love Eddie Murphy.

Speaker 1 (33:51):
Ma.

Speaker 5 (33:51):
I like Eddie Murphy for his complete body of work,
not just stand up though, No, not, I love it standing.
I watched Eddie Murphy raw in eighty eight when I
was eight years old, you know, when it came out.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
But now he's apologizing for that old material. That's what
I don't like.

Speaker 2 (34:04):
And I will say this about apologizing them for the material.
I don't care that it's offensive by today's standards, but
some of those jokes, like watching old Lenny Bruce routines,
it's not really funny anymore. Not humor changes.

Speaker 5 (34:15):
When you watched the Improv Sixty Years of Improv on Netflix.
The jokes that like David Spade was telling at the
comedy store in nineteen eighty eight, they're not funny, right,
they're awful, They're not good.

Speaker 3 (34:28):
But he's funny. He's funny, and his stuff now is great.

Speaker 5 (34:30):
But I think, just the same way sports evolve, I
think comedy does as well, movies evolve.

Speaker 2 (34:36):
But back in the eighties, David Spade at the improv
or at the comedy store, that was cutting eggs, Edgy,
this guy was the latest thing anyway. Ednie Murphy's got
a new documentary about his life. We're going to watch
a little bit of it and react to it right
now on the air. I've done so many different types
of things.

Speaker 3 (34:57):
Good Morning, my neighbors. He had that appointment with destiny.

Speaker 6 (35:05):
He changed the way we view comedy.

Speaker 3 (35:10):
Who took all the money? Shreck Shrek Shreck?

Speaker 1 (35:20):
I started so young.

Speaker 3 (35:21):
Daddy was right out of high school, but he was
just fearless.

Speaker 5 (35:26):
My stuff took off the coasts of They've never seen
a young black person take charge.

Speaker 1 (35:32):
He had the number one movie, comedy special and pop
song that was unprecedented.

Speaker 2 (35:37):
He's like a miracle from stand up comic to big
screen sex symbol.

Speaker 3 (35:41):
That's what they said. I didn't say.

Speaker 5 (35:44):
He went from being the wrong guy to the family guy.
He it was a great house taunt, like a hundred
years from there.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
I heard her doing that laugh upstairs. Eddie never stops creating.
I want to show them that I'm not like anybody in.

Speaker 5 (36:04):
His town, everybody in the scene and everything in between.

Speaker 3 (36:08):
He amplified black talent. It changed the world, not just
American culture. He changed the world. Yeah, I guess so.

Speaker 1 (36:16):
Yeah, one of the greatest ever.

Speaker 3 (36:20):
It's all about my children. Pursue peace of mind. If
you get that, then you got it all.

Speaker 2 (36:32):
In the nineteen eighties, Eddie Murphy was not supposed to
be the biggest star on Saturday Night Live, but he was.
It was actually him and Joe Piscopo. The biggest star
was supposed to be this guy named Charlie Rockett. Charlie
Rockett was not well liked by the audience. He accidentally
swore on the air ones got kicked off the show.

Speaker 3 (36:51):
And then committed suicide years later. Have you heard this
story before? Wow, I didn't know that.

Speaker 4 (36:54):
No.

Speaker 2 (36:55):
Yeah, he was the founder of the Dream Machine founder.
I'm sorry, Yeah he was. I think this is the
same guy. Actually, maybe I have his name wrong. Anyway,
the point is a guy died, so the person Charles Rockett,
not Charlie Rockett. I guess there's a Charlie Rockett and
a Charles rocket but that doesn't really matter for the
sake of conversation. Comedians often have a dark CD underbelly.

(37:17):
They're all funny on stage and then behind the scenes
you realize it's a.

Speaker 5 (37:20):
Dark I hear that. But I'm different in the guys
that I know. You know, it's not like that, like
the guys I meet.

Speaker 2 (37:27):
Well, you don't do drugs, but you are a degenerate gambler.
You don't drink or do or do any drugs. I've
been on tour with you.

Speaker 3 (37:33):
I've never even tried a drug or drink. I've never
been drunk in my life.

Speaker 5 (37:36):
You've done edibles, you have a bit about it, but
not often.

Speaker 3 (37:41):
Yeah, to help you fall asleep. That's not really the
same thing, though.

Speaker 5 (37:44):
It's like I've taken half of an adderall because I
had to drive to Missourian a day.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
How'd that go?

Speaker 5 (37:49):
I got to Missouri? I counted all the white lines
on the way there. Kenny, we did a great job.
That's fantastic. Yes, all right.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
Thoughts on the Eddie Murphy trailer you just watched, you
got goosebumps and just that body of work. What a like?
What a prolific body of work for that guy.

Speaker 5 (38:05):
Look just tremendous nutty professor doing all those characters by himself.
I remember watching Beverly Hills Cop when I was ten
and eleven years old and just that laugh his character.
He redefined entertainment, Like the dude's a legend.

Speaker 2 (38:19):
My brother, Jesse Payton, I am so grateful that you
were here today. You've been promoting your charity golf event
for Camp Hope. Yeah, people can learn more about that
at jesseosfunny dot com.

Speaker 3 (38:29):
You're on tour.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
You got any local shows coming up in the Walton
Johnson listening area you want.

Speaker 3 (38:33):
To put out.

Speaker 5 (38:34):
I've got eleven six and eleven seven, November six November seventh,
November sixth. I'm gonna be a Conroe icehouse in the
Montgomery County area. And then November seventh, I'm doing a
free show, Kenny, I don't do a lot of free shows.
At Dukes and Humble On November seventh, I think that's
a Friday, So those two shows are coming up. I
have a very big show at Docy Doe on December twentieth,

(38:56):
I'm doing couples therapy and you'll probably be on that one.

Speaker 3 (38:58):
I hate to bring it up, but the owner at docy.

Speaker 5 (39:01):
Doe, yeah, he passed recently. Man, very sad. This guy
was pivotal Actually in my career. I was the first
comedian to actually sell out Docy Doe. He opened some
doors for me and was very he The last show
that he had gone to was my show, so it
was pretty tragic.

Speaker 1 (39:18):
Man.

Speaker 2 (39:19):
He must have really hated your comedy. There's that dark,
seated underbelly right there. So I'm not proud of it.
But you laughed, and I bet he would have too.

Speaker 3 (39:27):
I'm Kenny Webster. I love you all. Thank you so
much for listening. Follow Jesse Payton on AX.

Speaker 2 (39:31):
To those of you watching us live streaming, we'll read
some of your comments after the show.

Speaker 3 (39:35):
Stick around after party coming up.

Speaker 6 (39:42):
You are listening to the pursuit of Happy Miss Radio,
to the government

Speaker 5 (39:49):
To kiss your ass when you listen to this show.