"Bereavement in kitchens"

Healthy ways to use the kitchen when dealing with ultimate loss.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
Yo yo yo, yo, yo yo yo. Cause everybody doing today,
hey man, basically join anything I leave yes a qushio
morioty LLC. And I know everybody's in a rush to

(00:27):
get in, but you know we're kind and I'm sorry
to be sarcastic or sound kind of sinning, but I'm
gonna need you guys to be patient. I know our
food is good, but what I really really need you
to do is please wait to be seated. Yup, yup.
This is that culinary arts podcast. And right off the gate,

(00:51):
I'm gonna let you guys know something really sad has
occurred over the last week. The Golden Hoosier has went
through some stuff. Man. We lost we lost the cook,

(01:12):
we lost the server. I'm sorry. He worked in the
front of the house. He was a server and bartender,
resting piece to the homie logan. I called him weapon
resting piece to the homie weapon. And I'm gonna say
in his memory, watch out for bikers on the road, man,
be extra careful when you're on the road, man, cause
that's somebody, that's somebody on that motorcycle. Alright, so watch

(01:35):
out for bikers. And in this show, out of respect
to him. We're gonna talk about bereavement in kitchens, alright.
Bereavement in kitchens, uh. Bereavement in kitchens refers to and

(01:57):
this is AI overview refers to how the kitchen and
food play a significant role in the grieving process for
both those who are mourning and those who wish to
support them, offering a space for ritual remembrance, connection, and
physical substance during a difficult time. In this context, the

(02:20):
kitchen can become a place for preparing comfort foods, honoring
the loved one's favorite meals are a gathering space for
support while also providing simple, easy to manage options for
those struggling with appetite are the energy to cook. All right,
So let me give you some details. I work at

(02:43):
Golden who was your pretty much Wednesday through Sunday, all right.
I'm off on Monday and Tuesdays. So when I walked
into this place of business this last Wednesday, I knew
that there was something up. And when I heard the animation,
I was so happy that my final words to my

(03:05):
friend would be safe, because I've been through this situation
before at a restaurant where the last words I said
to somebody weren't the nicest. They weren't like excruciatingly painfully mean,
but they weren't nice. I told my homegirl to toughen up,

(03:27):
not knowing that that would be the last time I
even saw her. So I'm happy for myself, but I'm
sad that we're at a loss. I'm happy that, although
I didn't have the strongest emotional connection with this man,
I had the honor of knowing such a nice person.
He was just a really nice guy man, and he

(03:50):
was really young twenty three, but he was really young
twenty three, and he had his whole life ahead of him. Man,
he had his whole life ahead of him. So once
again I'm saying, really look out for bikers. And he
had a lot of impact today at the job, what

(04:13):
they decided to do since so many people actually wanted
to cope, they just we closed early. I think the
Golden Hoosh just about to close in about twenty minutes,
twenty three minutes, and then everybody's gonna be on their
way paying their respects to the brother. He had a lot.
Apparently he had a lot of impact on a lot
of people's lives, and definitely, man, big ups to you.

(04:35):
L weapons remember you. I'm gonna try my best to
remember you, brother, for as long as I possibly can,
because you deserve that effort. You are a really good guy.
And it's the brothers like you are very rare. When
I say I'm gonna make that effort is because it

(04:56):
takes effort to remember people that had impact on you.
And sometimes it don't, but sometimes it do. Because his
impact was invisible, but I could feel it, and the
only way I felt it was through loss. Sometimes you
just don't know a good thing till it's gone. So
how the kitchen becomes a space for bereavement, ritual and routine.

(05:19):
Preparing a loved one's favorite dish can create a sense
of comforting structure in a way to connect with their
presence in the kitchen. So let's say you can remember something.
Let me think, for example, I remember the Homegirl Nicole
Elizabeth Allen. Around the time she passed, t pain was
really popular, so buy you a drink and bartender, those

(05:42):
were songs she couldn't dance. She was shy and she
was like, Harold, I can't dance. So I taught her
how to dance to those songs. So when I hear
those songs. I remember her, and I would say I
got I got two or three memories with Logan. One
that wasn't so fine. We kind of got smart with
each other. The other one which was kind of cool.

(06:03):
It was over some music. Two of them was about music.
One was about the homie Maxi Demon from Brooklyn. He
was dropping in bomb though. And then he gave me
some advice on like rent with my uncles and with
my uncle situation with my uncle. And it was pretty
decent advice. You know. He was just saying people get
a grace period and then stand on business. But as

(06:25):
far as food, I can't remember any food that he
used to really like. I do know that he didn't
mind drill rapping. He liked motorcycles. All right. So remember
it's a storytelling, just like I did. Cooking and deceased
person's favorite meal or sharing recipes can spark memories, conversations
and keep their spirit alive within the family. All right.

(06:47):
We got community and support just like people needed. Okay,
there were people who were tonight, you know, all on
Monday night is my off night at the Golden Husha.
There were people who were gonna want to get off
to go to the service, and I was willing to
work so they could go to the service. So community
and support food gatherers people. A meal brought to a

(07:09):
grieving family provides comfort in a tangible way for friends
and family to show sympathy and support. So taking them
an apple pie. If I was to went to the funeral,
maybe I would have took something that I know they
liked to eat. You know, just be a little nice,
going out your way somewhat for somebody. Excuse me, we

(07:31):
have physical sustenance. Grief can be exhausting and eating becomes challenging.
The kitchen provides the necessary space to prepare simple, accessible
meals and hacks. Now I'm gonna say this, it was
hard to work because you could just feel the tension
or like some people were just they were overly doing

(07:52):
things to take their mind off of whatever was going on.
You could just feel that there were some people really
dealing with the loss, and are those they haven't They
haven't been through stuff like this, They're not too familiar
with it, so it could be harder for them than
it is others. All Right, healing and mindfulness. The act

(08:14):
of cooking, though it may be challenging, can also be
a form of therapy, fostering mindfulness and a connection to
the present moment during a time of profound loss. All right,
we give you guys a couple of ideas on how
to become no that was the overall definition of bereavement

(08:37):
and kitchens. We went over how the kitchen becomes a
space for bereavement. That was the ritual, ritual and routine, remembering,
some storytelling, community and support, the physical sustenance and healing
and mindfulness. Now we're going to go over ideas for
navigating the kitchen during grief. All right, So the general

(08:58):
managers out there in the kitchen dealing with people who
have lost coworkers that work that they've been working closely
for a while, you know, help them focus on simplicity
out for easy to well even being at home. If
you're preparing a meal, how about this. This is better
because this isn't really suited for that. If you're preparing
a meal at home, focus on make things that are

(09:20):
easy to prepare, like small places of cheese and crackers
are used, disposable containers and serving because it you don't
have to wash dishes, it's low maintenance. It's just something
soap and water boombam out to dry. It's nothing that
you really gotta scrub. Organize support, coordinate meal deliveries through
a meal train to avoid overwhelming the bereave with numerous

(09:42):
visitors and decisions about what to eat. All right, So
have account know the quantis, know the quantity, all right.
Preserve memories, collect and share recipes that hold special meaning
for the loved one, creating a tangible connection to their
life and memory. Fortunately, in these type of situations. In

(10:05):
twenty twenty five, we got apps like Snapchat, which I
think is really good for stuff like that. Taking if
you had Snapchat and you took pictures of your friend,
putting it on Snapchat and making little collajs so people
could just see the good times that you've had with
your friends that don't hurt. It spreads a little cheer.
Acknowledging the senses, the physical act of cooking, the warmth

(10:27):
of the oven and the aromas of spices can provide
a ground and therapeutic experience. Smells can definitely be triggering.
That can be good and bad, So be careful, be
really really careful. Also, fine comfort and shared food, eating together,
even a small, simple meal reinforces the idea of connection

(10:47):
and support during a period of loss. Oh my goodness,
now that's a deep one. So e if somebody can
really really help unan take is really powerful and if
you congregate uine lead with people who are really positive,
it can help build. It helps. It's just a big
pro you know. It's very healthy and can be therapeutic

(11:11):
and good for the bond. All right, So for today,
that will be what we're gonna talk about. That will
be the show. Next Monday, it'll be we're going back
to like regular culinary again. I just wanted to take
some time out and give people something, some type of content. Today.

(11:36):
I am gonna take the time out to bereathe a
little for the homeboy because it is almost four o'clock
and in my mind, I'm knowing that's when the services start.
So we're gonna go ahead and close out today show
right now. Thanks for tuning in. Please tune in next
Monday at three thirty for another episode of Please Wait

(11:56):
to Be Seated