Elsa

Talking spanking and more with my friend, Elsa.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is the Never Too Old for a Good Spanking Podcast.

Speaker 2 (00:07):
Put the hands up front, stick that butt out, stick
it out.

Speaker 1 (00:13):
Yes, sir, I need a guy spain. I need a
guy spain. I need a guy spain.

Speaker 2 (00:22):
I need Hey, everybody, Welcome to another episode of the
Never Too Old for a Good Spanking Podcast, and for
the second episode in a row. I have a spanko
right here next to me, ready to record live. Say
hello to everyone out there. Hi everyone, that's Elsa. Everybody.

(00:46):
She is twenty nine years old and she's right up
here in the northeast. But I'd like you all to
welcome to the show my new friend, Elsa. How are
you doing today?

Speaker 1 (00:57):
I am doing great. It's been four months since I've
seen you, and you didn't discipline me for the past
four months, and I became a huge slut.

Speaker 2 (01:08):
We'll definitely talk about that soon. I don't usually shame
people on this podcast, but there might be a first time.
I do have a question for you right now, though.
It's come to my attention that when you first found
my podcast, it made you horny as fuck? Is that true?

Speaker 1 (01:24):
Yes, but I've told you this a million times.

Speaker 2 (01:28):
You might have told me, but you did not tell
that very true. When did you find my podcast?

Speaker 1 (01:36):
I think I found your podcast for the first time
about one year ago, and it was before I had
truly truly accepted my identity as a spanko. So the
first time I found it, it was just from doing
one of those searches that we all do on the
internet where you're gathering information on this topic, like it's

(01:57):
your full time job. And that's when I found the
po and I felt so much shame upon arriving at
it that the only episode I felt comfortable to listen
to was the episode with doctor Eve because it had
the title doctor in it, so I'm thinking, Okay, this
isn't that bad. You know, it's a doctor. And then
I didn't listen to it for several months. Something happened

(02:20):
in there where I had like a moment of radical
acceptance that I like spanking, and then I circled back.
I binged it so much over the summer down at
the beach, that's where I would get so horny. And
then about a month after binging your podcast, I emailed you.

Speaker 2 (02:36):
And it was a very delightful email, but one of
the most fantastic first emails I've ever gotten from anyone,
because it was like your cover letter for a new job.
You included every detail about yourself, what you thought of me,
stuff about spanking, and pictures, and I'm looking and I'm like,
there's no way she's real. This is too perfect. But

(02:58):
then obviously you're sitting next to me and everything was true.
But I really appreciate emails like that because it makes
things so much easier, where it doesn't feel like you
know all this stuff about me and I know nothing
about you.

Speaker 1 (03:12):
That was exactly my intention in the stuff I decided
to tell you. I had listened to your whole podcast.
I had a lot of trust built with you, and
I felt like I knew you really well. So I
was thinking, what do I need to give him to
feel similar trust with me? And I did include four
different pictures, two of which included my backside.

Speaker 2 (03:33):
Yeah, well that's very important.

Speaker 1 (03:35):
And then two were just like normal pictures, you know,
not with a lot of filters or anything like that.
I wanted my authenticity to shine through. And I hope
that now that you've known me for we first met
in September in person, that you see that I really
am that person.

Speaker 2 (03:53):
I'm less than a foot away from you right now,
and I could see clearly with my two eyes even
though I have reading glasses on you are that person?
What did you find first? Did you find my videos first?
Or my podcast?

Speaker 1 (04:07):
I found your podcast first, and then I was too
ashamed stepped away for a few months. In that time,
I found your videos, but I did not make the
connection that it was the same person from that crazy
spanking podcast I had found until I binged your podcast
and then I made a fet life account because I

(04:27):
really wanted to see more of you, and you do
have great photos on there, so that's really great content.

Speaker 2 (04:33):
Really the photos are the girls.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
True, true, the beautiful women, but your work. I did
have a moment where I was like, oh my gosh,
it's that guy from those videos because they made an
impression on me. They were some of the hottest videos
I had found. Oh and it was the type of
spanking content that I had been looking for for like

(04:58):
twenty years because the first time I did an Internet
search like that, I was I was nine years old, unfortunately.

Speaker 2 (05:05):
But anyways, and you're twenty nine now, correct twenty years
ago you.

Speaker 1 (05:09):
Made that search, yes, and I finally found what I
was looking for.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
You're saying that you really only started doing these searches,
and I'm sure you did some before and then of
course you felt your shame and ran back into your
little hole. But you really started this at about twenty
eight years old, like really looking.

Speaker 1 (05:27):
When my last relationship ended close to two years ago.
That was the last time I was ever in like
a traditional relationship, and that's the last time I ever
want to be in something like that. I was struggling
to have sex during the relationship because it was vanilla sex,
and you know, I was also dealing with my own
trauma and it just wasn't what I wanted. So as

(05:48):
soon as it ended, I remember, I got super horny again,
even though I hadn't had desire or a sex drive
for like a year, and then for over a year
I did not act on anything. So actually, I was
just completely honest with myself about what I want, and
that's when I just started watching crazy, crazy amounts of

(06:10):
spanking porn and getting so into it and watching all
of your videos.

Speaker 2 (06:17):
You're saying twenty eight is when you first listened to
my podcast.

Speaker 1 (06:21):
Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 2 (06:22):
Was that the one that made you horny or did
you have to throw that away for a little while
and come back and then found it again. And that's
what made you horny? Which part was the part that
made you horny? That's what I'm trying to figure out here.

Speaker 1 (06:36):
Oh my gosh, just truly your podcast over this past summer,
listening to it in just like massive quantities, that was
getting me just absolutely insane. I took a bunch of
trips this summer. And that's also when I started emailing
with you back and forth, which was just so exciting

(06:56):
sitting down to craft that email. You know, I am
a professional writer, so that is why the email was
so good. But all of that was just beyond exciting.
I think about spanking twenty four to seven. I think
in some ways it is a little bit of a
survival tactic to like escape the chaos of my everyday life.

(07:17):
I just can go to my kind of spanking fairytale land.
So when I was nine and googled it, that was
the first time I saw the word fetish and I
knew it had something to do with porn, which I
just knew that all of that was considered really bad,
and I'd say pretty much ever since then, it's on
my mind twenty four to seven, regardless of how inconvenient

(07:39):
that might be for my life.

Speaker 2 (07:41):
Whenever I first realized that spanking was a thing in
my life, it was so consuming. I'm not happy that
I'm fifty seven years old. I'm absolutely not happy about that.
I am, but I know you are. We'll talk about
that too. But I'm happy that I don't think about
it like I did back then, because you know, I

(08:02):
mean the same way that any person out there has
something that totally consumes them. That's how I felt. That's
all I could think of. And back then we did
not have the Internet, I did not have all this stuff,
so it was all formulated in my head and I
could not get it out of there. Sitting in class
all day long, all I could think of is I

(08:22):
want to spank her. I want to spank her. I
want to spank her. And how am I going to
be able to do that. I'm not going to be
able to do that. Or do I just walk up
to them and say I want to spank you? It
doesn't work that way. But it was so crazy. I'm
happy that I don't think about it like I used to.
But it's like anything whenever you don't have it for
a little while. All of a sudden, it's totally consuming. Now,

(08:45):
before we started this podcast, I should let people out
there know that we not only warm up to our
vocal cords because we had to try out to make
sure that the volume was all cool here, but we
also warmed up a little physically by giving you a
spanking because I felt that that was necessary to have
a good podcast episode. When was the last time you

(09:05):
got spanked? Before that spanking I gave you seconds before this.

Speaker 1 (09:09):
Podcast started, like eight days ago.

Speaker 2 (09:13):
Was he better than me? Wait?

Speaker 1 (09:15):
Wait?

Speaker 2 (09:15):
Wait? Was it he?

Speaker 1 (09:17):
It was a he?

Speaker 2 (09:18):
Was he better than me?

Speaker 1 (09:19):
Thanks for not assuming I see I've taught you something.
Oh my god, this is a really scary question. This
man kind of spanked his way to my heart.

Speaker 2 (09:33):
I've never had a man spank his way to my heart.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
I wasn't expecting it. He was not a season spanker.
I actually showed him some of your videos and after
I showed him your recent video window Pane with Riley,
very nice video. After I showed him that, he probably
gave me the best banking of my life. So I'm
sorry out of this house this instant. But you definitely

(10:01):
were in the room, that's true. Can I show you
some pictures?

Speaker 2 (10:08):
How about if you show me pictures after the podcast,
because these people probably won't be able to.

Speaker 1 (10:12):
See them, but they might want to hear your reaction.

Speaker 2 (10:15):
All right, let's see these pictures.

Speaker 1 (10:17):
Okay. The picture I'm going to show you is graphic.

Speaker 2 (10:20):
Okay, it's probably nothing I haven't seen before, right, damn.

Speaker 1 (10:25):
So there's my buttthole. But I had to spread my
cheeks because look at those on the inside.

Speaker 2 (10:33):
You were telling me about these before, because I was
smacking you down the middle of your butt and you
were saying how this guy left bruises between your butt cheeks.
And that's what I'm looking at right now. They're very
good pictures. I'm sure if you posted them to fet life,
people would love to see these pictures. But I'm sure
you won't, not yet.

Speaker 1 (10:50):
It was I'm not ready for that. The fact that
I'm even talking about this and allowing the public to
view me in a sexual way is a big deal
for me. But it's necessary.

Speaker 2 (11:02):
This really has only come about for you in like
the last two years. Before that, you were just hiding
in your little spank Okay, like the rest of us used.

Speaker 1 (11:10):
To do, yeah, but doing other freaky stuff.

Speaker 2 (11:13):
I know that.

Speaker 1 (11:17):
Do you understand why I'm so obsessed with those marks
inside of my butthole?

Speaker 2 (11:22):
I do not know why you're so obsessed with the
marks inside ther crack of your buttocks.

Speaker 1 (11:27):
I don't know either, but I might even have like
a fetish about that because it's so extreme the way
that that makes me feel.

Speaker 2 (11:35):
Well. Everyone likes different things when it comes to spanking,
which makes this great. But the hardest thing is is
to find someone that likes exactly what you like about spanking.
You could find people who will meet you in the
middle and do what you like, and you're going to
do some things that they like when it comes to spanking,
But to find someone that clicks all the boxes is

(11:58):
really really tough. You liking those little marks in the
crack of your butt, it's not really as important to me,
But knowing that you like that, I'm going to give
you those marks. If we were together, I would be
more than happy to create those marks for you in
the crack of your butt.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
Thank you, Thank you so much.

Speaker 2 (12:20):
Let's go back to your early days. What did you
see before you saw the internet that you're like, Wow,
that's really cool.

Speaker 1 (12:30):
Up until that point, I don't know if there's anything
I saw that I actually thought was cool. I guess,
like so many people on this podcast, I grew up
in the Catholic Church, and I went through a lot
of sexual trauma, physical trauma.

Speaker 2 (12:45):
With the Catholic Church.

Speaker 1 (12:46):
With the Catholic Church, with my community, and I definitely
view the Catholic Church as the common denominator in all
of that and creating the unsafe culture because, as we know,
when people can't express themselves sexually, it kind of creates
a breeding ground for a lot of abuse to happen.
One of the reasons I felt comfortable coming on this

(13:09):
podcast was because you've had such a diverse variety of
voices or different experiences people who have been through similar
things is me. So I remember first hearing Sarah's episode
and speaking about the complexities of being a domestic violence
survivor and also liking spanking, and of course Lea's episode
I related to on a really deep level. And actually

(13:32):
that's the only person I've ever messaged on fet life
was Leah, just to tell her how much I loved
her episode and what it meant to me. As a survivor,
and so I think the fact that all of the
spanking that I saw, you know, it was in the
context of what I would consider abuse, and not only
physical abuse, but for me, it is inherently sexual. I mean,

(13:54):
spanking is sex to a spanko, I like spanking more
than I like sex. You like spanking more than you
like sex, I assume. Yeah. So I don't know if
there was anything at all positive or cool that I
related spanking to, but that just shows how little control

(14:14):
you have over what you're sexually attracted to. So even
though spanking is only like a dark, scary thing in
my childhood, I was still tapping into the magic of it,
and I've kind of held on to that in a
lot of ways, and I think that's how I've gotten
through a lot of the hard times in my life.
That's why I call myself Elsa and I very much

(14:36):
identify with being a princess. It's like I can create
magic out of these hard situations and bring some joy
into it and make it my own and regain control
over it. Whether it's just in my head. When it
starts in your imagination, it can manifest into fruition, and
that's how I see spanking.

Speaker 2 (14:57):
And here you are, now just really two years grasping
this spanko membership, and you're teaching guys who are not
spankos how to give spankings. Not only are you teaching them,
you're teaching them to be better than me. And I
think that's funny as hell because the last person I

(15:19):
had on this podcast, she has played her podcast to
her vanilla friends, and she wants to make a couple
of videos and show them to her vanilla friends because
now some of her vanilla friends want to accompany her
just to try out getting a spanking, to see what
it's like. And one of her vanilla friends that listened

(15:39):
to the podcast said she found it hot as hell.
This person has no interest in spanking at all, and
she found a spanking podcast hot as hell. I think
that's fantastic. I think you people are doing a great
justice to the world bringing everyone into our little mix.

Speaker 1 (15:57):
Thank you. And the guy who spanked me recently, he's
an Australian tourist, we can call him assi tourist. He
felt intimidated that I had been spanked before, because not
only have I been spanked by you, but I also
recently saw a pleasure dum named Sebastian, who I can
get into in a minute. But you two are both older.

(16:19):
You're fifty seven. Sebastian is forty nine, and then the
AUSSI tourist is thirty seven, which for me is young,
but it's still old enough for me.

Speaker 2 (16:28):
It's very young also.

Speaker 1 (16:30):
Yeah, and so I had to get up the courage
to tell him that one I like spanking, and two
that I actually had reached out to you from the podcast,
and I told him the whole story. I got so
nervous before I told him. I was so awkward telling
him this story. It was truly so painful, but I
got it out.

Speaker 2 (16:50):
Yeah, but think about this, you really are just starting
to grasp this, and people out there need to know
that this is something you felt huge shame about for
a year and all of a sudden, now you're jumping
in head first. So I can see where you're still
going to keep going back and forth every once in
a while, especially when you're trying to bring someone new
into this. So continue.

Speaker 1 (17:11):
Yeah, So I told him, and I referred to you
as the King of spanking.

Speaker 2 (17:15):
By the way, I don't know about all that, but
go ahead continue your story.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
I said. His name is a good spanking. He has
a podcast about it. He has videos that he's been
making since before I was even legal. For example, you
started videos in two thousand and nine. I think actually
nine because I see the dates.

Speaker 2 (17:37):
Okay, whatever, it's not really important to this part of
the story.

Speaker 1 (17:41):
Sorry.

Speaker 2 (17:41):
The important part of this whole thing is that I'm great,
So continue.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
So he was really intimidated by that, So I said, Okay,
do you want to see some pictures? Because I was
also trying to seduce him.

Speaker 2 (17:55):
I'm not gonna lie, okay.

Speaker 1 (17:56):
And for me to even show like sexy pictures of myself,
it's it's a really big deal. Like I've struggled with
eating disorders. You know, I was in that first generation
of teen girls that had phones where you just started
to see our body image issues and mental health really tanking,
and so that has very much been my struggle, and
coming to spanking has actually gotten me to start looking

(18:18):
at my body in like a sexy way. But the
first picture I showed him was from the very first
spanking you gave me, where I had the pink pants
on that were pulled down a little bit.

Speaker 2 (18:29):
I do remember and let me make a confession right now,
I have looked at your body in sexy ways. Go
ahead with your story.

Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, you don't need to confess that. And so I
showed him the pictures and then we played that time
he spanked me. It was good, but it wasn't the
best one yet, which that would be. The next day.
He thought you were supposed to spank more like just
one spank and then kind of wait, which I really liked.
So I didn't correct him while he was doing it

(18:56):
because it felt great and what we were doing was
super hot. But then and I told him afterwards, I
actually like a lot of spanking. It's like bam bam,
bam bam. And he was like, oh really, And so
then the next day I just showed him your videos
and after that he gave me just the hottest spankings ever,
Oh my god.

Speaker 2 (19:15):
Which is what I tell people out there. If you
like a way that you want to be spanked, why
can't you show this video to someone and they could
just mimic the way that person's spanking. I don't think
spankos would have a problem, but if you're trying to
teach someone how to give you a spanking, how they
can't look at that video and do what that video

(19:36):
is doing. I don't know why that's such a problem,
but it is. And this guy picked it up right away,
almost too good.

Speaker 1 (19:43):
Yeah. And then at the end of the night he
told me to put my arms up on the wall
with my arms above my head, and he spanked me
so hard from like so many different directions and angles,
and it was so hot.

Speaker 2 (19:58):
I don't like how quickly this man's evolving.

Speaker 1 (20:01):
I know he's a threat for you know what.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
He sounds pretty sick to me. You need to get
rid of him. Let me ask you a question. Have
you ever in your head growing up, thought how can
I get this person to spank me without them knowing
that I want to be spanked? And have you ever
tried to put one of these plans in action?

Speaker 1 (20:22):
Kind of, I didn't ever actually want to be spanked,
but if I had a crush on a man authority figure,
especially if he was like a younger man, like a
cute teenager, I would definitely try to be like extra
naughty so that he would reprimand me in some way,
and I would totally get turned on by it.

Speaker 2 (20:41):
So you never came close to getting a spanking back
then at all. Not really have you ever shared anything
about this with any of other close friends or possibly
even family.

Speaker 1 (20:53):
Members, not spanking specifically, But everybody definitely knows that I'm kinky.
A lot of people know that I like rough sex,
a lot of people know that I like multiple men,
and everybody knows that I like older men.

Speaker 2 (21:07):
And now everyone out here listening to this podcast, they
know all of that. So none of your family members
know anything about your spanking proclivities, not.

Speaker 1 (21:19):
Unless they're listening to this podcast. Because I definitely believe
the thing about spanking running in families, and there's definitely
a lot of disturbing themes around spanking in my family,
So I guess I'll just have to find out after
the episode air.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
When I was growing up, my father did smack my
mother in the butt with one hitters every once in
a while, but I never thought he's into spanking. It
never made me think that what he's doing is, you know,
outing him as a spanko. Nothing my brothers have ever
done have made me think that they're spank goes. I
don't even know if any of them even have a fetish.

(21:56):
My youngest brother knows everything about me. He does have
a fetish. He said he could do this spanking thing
if someone wanted him to, but he obviously doesn't think
about it like we do. So you've never even told
a close friend about this.

Speaker 1 (22:11):
If people ask do you like to be spanked or
hit during sex? I say yes, of course, but no
I don't volunteer it.

Speaker 2 (22:22):
The first one to move during this break is going
over my knee.

Speaker 1 (22:26):
Welcome back to the show, you naughty spancos.

Speaker 2 (22:29):
When did you get what you would consider your first
spanko type spanking?

Speaker 1 (22:36):
September sixth, twenty twenty four. That was the first time
I came to see you.

Speaker 2 (22:43):
Here's the funny thing about our meeting. I always tell
people on this podcast, gotta be safe. You got to
feel safe when you're doing this. When you told me
you wanted to find an Airbnb in the middle of
nowhere in the woods, I'm thinking, what am I walking into.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
I was worried that you were going to think I
was trying to kill you as well. But I needed
to be out in nature because that's when I relax
the most, and that's when I also just get super
horny and always really want to speaking it.

Speaker 2 (23:17):
Wasn't really in the middle of nowhere, but it was
a cottage on the lake, and there were only a
few cottages in that area. But there's no doubt in
my mind that if anybody in those cottages went outside,
they are absolutely going to know what was going on
inside that cottage.

Speaker 1 (23:33):
Right, And that makes me very nervous to think about,
but also very excited And I'm really loud. Would you
agree with that?

Speaker 2 (23:42):
I don't think you were that bad. I don't think
that anyone outside is going to think that someone's being
tortured in there, but I definitely think that they are
going to think someone is being spanked in there.

Speaker 1 (23:54):
That's quite overwhelming.

Speaker 2 (23:57):
But it also was not totally warm. It was kind
of getting chilly. I never saw anyone outside, but it
was a beautiful area. I thought it was a really
nice little place to have a first spanking.

Speaker 1 (24:11):
Absolutely, that was probably the best weekend of that entire
year for me. Rainbows were going off in my head
from that first making. I was so on cloud nine,
and I remember you basically being like, well, it'll never
be this good again, so you better enjoy it.

Speaker 2 (24:28):
That's true, And like I tell everyone, enjoy everything. You're
getting because it's never going to be like this again.
You're never going to get a first time again. You
may get a first time at someone being better than me, obviously,
because you already stated that, but you're never going to
come back to your first spanking, which you would consider
your first spanking. Because I know that you had a
boyfriend that you made spank you at the beach one time.

(24:52):
Tell them about that real quick before we get back
into your first experience.

Speaker 1 (24:55):
That was the relationship that I said was kind of
my only normal one that I was like, on ever
do that again? And he was just actually really mad
at me, so it was kind of perfect. And he
had gone for a long walk on the beach. I
think he probably wanted me to come after him, and
I didn't, but I got so horny while he was
away that I actually pulled up my phone and was
googling beach spanking porn. That's how That's how horny I am.

(25:23):
And then when he came back, he's kind of still pouting,
and so he sits down in the sand and I
just come and lay down on my stomach as close
to him as possible, so my butt's completely in his
face and he kind of warmed up a little bit
to that. I remember he was like, babe, wow, and
then I just said, am I bad? And he was

(25:43):
like yes, and he started spanking me, and then we
actually went and fucked in the bushes.

Speaker 2 (25:49):
Nice right at the beach.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
It was isolated, nobody was around. But at the time,
and I can't even remember if I've told you about this,
I was really struggling with vaginus, which is a female
form of sexual dysfunction.

Speaker 2 (26:04):
I would remember that word.

Speaker 1 (26:07):
For those of you who don't know, vaginismus is a
sexual dysfunction people with vaginas can have. It's often related
to trauma, but not specifically, and it's really common and
very rigid religious communities. And basically, when you have sex
and you're turned on, your vagina is supposed to open
a little bit, but for people with vaginismus, it doesn't,

(26:30):
and that creates very painful sex. That was one of
the reasons why I didn't have sex for almost two years.
I was just traumatized from dealing with the pain of that.
But basically the beach spanking was so sexy that that
was one of the few times my vagina actually opened
up and I enjoyed sex. So it was very special
to me because I actually haven't had that many good

(26:52):
sexual experiences, even though I've had a lot of them.

Speaker 2 (26:56):
Yes, yes you have. I've heard so many stories, and
sometimes I'm afraid for you, I know. So get back
to your first banking. What were some of your favorite
parts the.

Speaker 1 (27:08):
Very first time we met. The anticipation of that was
so incredibly massive because I first emailed you, I think
in June or July, and we didn't meet until September.

Speaker 2 (27:20):
It's pretty good, though, that's not that long.

Speaker 1 (27:23):
No, I make things happen.

Speaker 2 (27:25):
You wanted it to be quicker, and I had to
slow you down because I got a sedule to keep.

Speaker 1 (27:30):
I know you are kind of rigid with your schedule.
I try to come down here last minute, and you
don't like that.

Speaker 2 (27:38):
No, it's not that I don't like that, but I
usually have stuff planned right.

Speaker 1 (27:41):
You're in high demand, you know.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
I managed quite a few fantasy teams.

Speaker 1 (27:48):
The anticipation I think made that first banking just absolutely insane.
I mean, I don't know that whole day will be
like a huge day for me for the rest of
my life, whereas it's kind of just like another spanking
for you. I remember you came. I had to walk
to the top of that hill to meet you, and
I was so nervous.

Speaker 2 (28:09):
You didn't have to you chose to.

Speaker 1 (28:10):
I chose to because I wanted to give you a
warm wealth.

Speaker 2 (28:12):
I didn't force you to walk to the top of hell.
That wasn't a stipulation to meeting you.

Speaker 1 (28:18):
No, could you tell I was nervous when you first met.

Speaker 2 (28:21):
I can always tell when you guys are nerves. I'm
actually nervous too when I'm meeting someone brand new, especially
when I'm meeting in the middle of the woods. I
don't show it as much because I've done this a
million times now, but to see the looks on your faces,
I just wanted to tell you, don't be so nervous,
but I know it's not going to help.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
As soon as I saw you you have a great smile.
I was so attracted to you too, because also I
didn't totally know what you looked like. I hadn't seen
your face. I was just going off of all of
the positive words of the other notable women on this
podcast who say you're very handsome. You can kind of
tell based on all the content you have out there,

(29:00):
so I knew I was attracted to your body, but
when I saw your face too, I was like, this
is definitely one of my fantasy.

Speaker 2 (29:09):
Were you objectifying me? I was shame.

Speaker 1 (29:13):
I was fetishizing you. And then that weekend, I don't know,
it was just magical.

Speaker 2 (29:21):
Is there anything that you wanted to do that weekend
when it comes to spanking that we didn't get to.

Speaker 1 (29:27):
Probably an outdoor spanking. We still haven't done that. I
also really liked the flogger by the.

Speaker 2 (29:33):
Way, too, Which one was the flogger you have, like.

Speaker 1 (29:36):
A little flogger. I think this might have been the
second day you were spanking me in the bedroom on
the bed with the flogger.

Speaker 2 (29:44):
Oh, you're talking about the cat of nine tails, the
black one. Yeah, it's kind of like a novelty item
that someone gave me for my twenty first birthday, really
not even knowing. They gave me a box full of stuff,
and this was one of those things. It's actually really nice.
They had no idea what they'd just done.

Speaker 1 (30:02):
They gave that to you that many years ago.

Speaker 2 (30:05):
Right, but it was a box full of just all
crazy things, and that was the only sexual thing that
they gave me in this box and it was for
my twenty first birthday, and I pulled this out. There
was a couple of girls there that I had spanks,
so they know. But these people that gave me this
thing had no idea that I like spanking. They still
to this day do not know that I like spanking.

Speaker 1 (30:26):
It's funny how that happens.

Speaker 2 (30:27):
But I guarantee you the girls that I was spanking
at the time absolutely knew this thing was going to
be meeting their butts very.

Speaker 1 (30:35):
Soon, so that really turned me on.

Speaker 2 (30:40):
It was a good weekend.

Speaker 1 (30:42):
Yeah, two days.

Speaker 2 (30:43):
I do remember sitting down by the water. We talked
a lot. One of my favorite things to do when
I am meeting with different girls is I know, spanking
should be my favorite thing, but eating and having a
good conversation that is my favorite thing because I really
like to hear what you guys have to say.

Speaker 1 (30:59):
Yeah, yes, we do. Both like to talk about sexual topics,
which definitely is a good foundation for a friendship.

Speaker 2 (31:07):
You like to talk about more sexual topics, I pretty
much keep mine to spanking. You branch off into so
many different aspects of sex, and I just sit here
and listen and hear all your stories and I'm thinking, boy,
this is going to be some podcast stuff, which you

(31:28):
actually just agreed and I was not pushing you, but
you just agreed to that you wanted to do a
podcast episode. For a while you were like, no way,
no way, can I do a podcast episode? And finally
you're like, I want to do a podcast episode. I
never thought you were actually gonna want to do it.

Speaker 1 (31:46):
That's how I am. I'm very sincere with the things
that I say, but my opinions on things can change
really rapidly. So even in my first email to you,
I'm pretty sure I said that I'm not into implements right,
and it changed.

Speaker 2 (32:01):
No one knows what's going to happen after they get
their first introduction down the line, So many things can
change about what you like when it comes to spanking.
I don't think mine has changed all that much from
when I was younger to now. I pretty much still
just like to spank acute button. And I had a
fantastic time before this podcast giving you that little warm

(32:23):
up spanking so we would do our best job. Now,
you have a certain type when it comes to men,
and on one hand, I am very flattered that you
came and wanted me to give you your first real spanking.
Very flattered. But on the other hand, because now that
I know what I know about you, it makes me

(32:45):
feel a certain way. Do you know why that.

Speaker 1 (32:48):
Is because they're old?

Speaker 2 (32:51):
Because now I feel like you think I'm an old
man and that's why you came to get a spanking
for me. And then I think about it and I
realize that to most of the people that come to me,
I am an older man, sometimes much older, and it
makes me want to kind of go into the corner

(33:11):
in bingee cheese. It's but here's a question I have
for you. What is it about older men? And as
you always say, sometimes much older men, what does this
do for you?

Speaker 1 (33:26):
Yeah, this is an intense thing that I had to
come to terms with, just as much as I had
to come to terms with the spanking fetish. So I
do believe that this is a fetish because it's so
extreme and I can't shake it. It's funny to me
that you kept saying much older men, because you are actually.

Speaker 2 (33:45):
The oldest son of a bitch.

Speaker 1 (33:50):
Which is why you have such a special place in
my life.

Speaker 2 (33:55):
Well, you never forget your.

Speaker 1 (33:57):
First believe me, I'll never forget this. This is like
the craziest thing I've done in my life. I've lived
a pretty crazy life. Yeah, it says a lot.

Speaker 2 (34:08):
A lot of it has to do with older men.

Speaker 1 (34:10):
Good Lord, Yes, for better and for worse. I know
there are other people listening to this who get it.
I'm sure a lot of the girls who come and
see you they like older men too.

Speaker 2 (34:22):
So do you think that I'll actually be hotter in
your eyes when I'm walking with a cane?

Speaker 1 (34:27):
It's possible. And I know you look back and you're like,
you think you were hotter then, but I guarantee you,
to a lot of people, you're hotter now. And I
would have still been thrilled to get a spanking by you,
but that would not be as exciting for me as
if you swake me now when you're old. Sometimes this

(34:50):
whole spanking thing kind of seems to come into our
lives to make us be like, Damn, I'm hot I've
still got it. I know that happened with me because
the photos you've taken of me, some of them you're
in them, and I love those. But it's not even
a requirement. I can get off to a photo of
me having been spanked, and that's like the universe making

(35:11):
me look at myself and be like, you have to
admit that this is sexy and you're getting turned on
by it. So maybe young ladies like myself come into
your life so that you remember, like, damn, I'm still
pretty hot.

Speaker 2 (35:23):
I am so thankful that you guys Colm, and I
love that you have a good time when you're here,
But I'm wondering when the bottom is going to fall out.

Speaker 1 (35:35):
Back to the older guys thing. There's really a lot
to say here about working through the shame of that,
especially mentioning that I was a survivor and going through
a lot of confusion about my sexuality, having a lot
of shame of like do I actually like this or
was I just groomed to think that I like this?

(35:55):
So it was in that really pivotal time where I
went almost two years without having sex with anyone, without dating,
and that was also when I reached out to you,
and even for like one year, you were literally the
only man in my life. And I remember one time
being over your knee and being like, do you think
it's weird that you're the only man who I let
touch me. But you were the only person I felt

(36:18):
safe with to start out, and so thank you for
creating that safe space to play. But I would say
over the summer when I was binging the podcast, I
remember being in Colorado by myself on a solo trip,
because that's been super important to my healing, you know,
being a woman who goes out and does things by myself.

(36:38):
During those two years where I wasn't dating, I kind
of challenged myself, I don't want to make any decisions
in my life that are just to make a man happy.
I just need to start making decisions for me. And
that's what led me to getting spanked and kind of
bursting into this new universe where I'm allowing myself to
operate outside of the box even more than I was before.

(37:02):
But I was going for a lot of walks in
Colorado just telling myself, Okay, now's the time I'm going
to be completely honest with myself about what do I like,
what do I want? And truthfully, I was hoping that
I could maybe find out that I was attracted to women,
because I thought my life would be a lot easier
if there just weren't any men in it. Basically, I'm

(37:23):
sure a lot of women have felt that way.

Speaker 2 (37:25):
I would like to be the only man in that
version of the world.

Speaker 1 (37:29):
You were pretty close at one point, but then I
got very sludy again recently. That was your fault because
you didn't discipline me.

Speaker 2 (37:36):
It's my fault because I wasn't around to spank you.
Is why you got slutty with old men older, Have
any of them exceeded my age yet or no, No,
I'm still the oldest.

Speaker 1 (37:49):
But I was considering a sixty four year old.

Speaker 2 (37:52):
Oh well, that makes me feel a little better.

Speaker 1 (37:55):
And so I just had to get to that place
that we all do where it's like I like this
and it's not going away. And also in coming to
terms with my own trauma. I'm also three years sober,
and in the past three years, this is when I've
been admitting to myself the sexual trauma that I actually
went through. And in this time of piecing together my

(38:16):
story and telling it, something that I've had to accept
is that really, for like twenty years, I was met
with sexual assault at every step of the way, and
it was from older adults, but it was also from
my peers, and it was always that way. So for me,
that kind of proves it to me that that didn't

(38:36):
cause my fetish for old men because I've experienced abuse
from people of all ages and just in being honest
about the things that I like. Some of it, yes,
there is disturbing crossover between abuse that happened, but for
some of it, it doesn't make sense at all. There's
no clear correlation, And so I hope this can make

(38:57):
you feel better if you're worried that, like I think
I only like something because of something traumatic happening in
my experience, really going through a massive amount of trauma,
I can tell you that I don't think that one
causes the other because I definitely have some trauma with
spanking too. But still spanking remains the number one thing

(39:18):
when I play with people. I tell them there's really
no limit on how much you can spank me and
pull my hair because I love those things. They make
me so joyful, just like pure bliss. But then there
are other things, like having sex is way more complicated
for me. I have had sex recently now, for the
first time in two years, and they were good experiences,

(39:40):
but not as easy as spanking. I think after I
have sex, I experience just about every emotion under the sun.
I can feel very scared after having sex, and there
are things like that across all sexual acts across the board.

Speaker 2 (39:55):
I could see when there's some sexual abuse or emotional
abuse or physical abuse when you're growing up. If it
also mixes in kind of with the fetish that the
person is going through, it's got to be really confusing,
and it must consume your mind about this has to
be wrong.

Speaker 1 (40:12):
It's a lot to go through. You definitely don't just
wake up one day and start being radically accepting of
your fetishes because we don't live in that type of
sex positive culture. So every single message we're getting is
that it's dirty, bad and wrong, and then piled out
on top of feeling that way as a victim. It
is very confusing. But sex has almost always been so

(40:36):
negative for me throughout my life. It's like now I'm
more determined than ever to own it fearlessly and just
use my sexuality to get exactly what I want in
a way that's safe and magical and everything it can be.

Speaker 2 (40:52):
You see. That's why I feel that now that I'm
fifty seven, using my sexuality to get what I want
does not work as well as it did back when
I was thirty seven. Let's get back into a little
spanking talk. Now you haven't had a lot of this yet,
but what importance do you place on getting a lecture

(41:12):
or a scolding when you're getting a disciplinary spanking.

Speaker 1 (41:16):
I really like it. It's really hot, and I don't need it.
What I need the most is just the slapping part.
That's what makes me feel the best. That's why I
needed it before this podcast, because that will put a
smile on my face, like you are literally slapping me
into another dimension in my head where I'm actually happy.
So I do want to cry during a spanking, but

(41:38):
I really wonder if it's possible, because spanking puts a
smile on my face like nothing else.

Speaker 2 (41:44):
Let me ask you a few questions and we won't
go too in depth here. Just give me a yes
or no. Ready, Yes, so far so good? Mouse soaping,
no corner time. Maybe hand swats like when you reach
your hand back to block your butt. Yeah, temperature taking, no.

Speaker 1 (42:03):
Thank you.

Speaker 2 (42:04):
So I'm assuming that figuring and enema's are out correct.
Let's move on. Do you think eventually you might want
to be spanked by a female.

Speaker 1 (42:13):
If she's masculine. Yes, it just has to be a
masculine person who I'm attracted to.

Speaker 2 (42:19):
Would she have to be older? Yeah, much older?

Speaker 1 (42:24):
At least eight years?

Speaker 2 (42:26):
Well that's very specific.

Speaker 1 (42:28):
Well the Aussie guy's eight years.

Speaker 2 (42:30):
So I guess. Would you prefer that she gave you
a fun spanking or a disciplinary spanking or would you
like to try both?

Speaker 1 (42:38):
I'd like both, leaning towards disciplinary for some reason.

Speaker 2 (42:42):
Do you have any interest in giving a spanking?

Speaker 1 (42:45):
I really don't. I wish I did. It seems cool. Sorry,
this isn't a one word answer.

Speaker 2 (42:51):
Why did I ask for a one word answer?

Speaker 1 (42:53):
Oh, I'm trying to follow rules.

Speaker 2 (43:00):
Is there a celebrity out there you would love to
get a spank? I see you already shaking your head.
Let me just finish the question. Is there a celebrity
out there that you would love to get a spanking from?

Speaker 1 (43:11):
Yes? Ever since high school it has been doctor Drew.
If you guys like doctor Drew and you want to
be spanked by him, you would definitely like being spanked
by a good spink, and especially if he has his
glasses on.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
She told me this when I first met her, and
I do not see it I could see what you
say with the glasses on, because I we're reading glasses.
I could see that part of it. But nothing about
me looks anything like doctor Drew. He's a good looking.

Speaker 1 (43:38):
Man though, oh my god, so hot, and he's a therapist.
He talks about sex, he talks about addiction. I've struggled
with addiction. I've been in programs where I've wished doctor
Drew was on the inside of those hospital walls so
that I could have a sexy man to spank me.
I did actually get someone to a reed to spank

(44:00):
me when I was in an inpatient program. Really, if
you want to hear that story, I.

Speaker 2 (44:06):
Don't think anyone out there right now would forgive me
if I didn't let you finish.

Speaker 1 (44:12):
All right, So a sad part of my story and
trigger warning, I guess, although we can be lighthearted about it.
I did attempt suicide when I was a teenager and
I overdosed on pills and subsequently was in an inpatient program.
So in the inpatient program, I was fourteen at the time,
and there was this really cute seventeen year old guy

(44:34):
older again older, yeah, who was really good at doing
parkour dancing, do you know what that is. It's like
when they run up on the walls.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
I didn't know I was dancing. I thought it was
just parkoer.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
Okay, yeah, I don't know if it's dancing, to be honest,
but he would do parkour and he would dance, and
I thought that was super cool.

Speaker 2 (44:51):
Andy Dwight and Michael Scott started an episode of the
Office off by doing their version of parkour.

Speaker 1 (44:57):
Yeah go ahead, Yeah, so a set. You know, we
don't have cell phones, we don't even have doors on
our bedrooms, and we're high risk teenagers and we're horny,
and nobody in there is talking to us about any
type of safe sex or really anything useful at all.
They actually tried to diagnose me with adjustment disorder, meaning

(45:17):
I couldn't adjust to the trauma I was experiencing. Anyways,
it's just kind of a shit show, the whole system.
And the way that I got through it was the
seventeen year old guy and I would pass notes, which
wasn't allowed, and they started getting sexual and it started
to incorporate rough sex and shower sex, and I remember

(45:37):
writing one back saying and if I don't listen to you,
what will you do, and he wrote back saying, slap
your ass, pull your hair, and I was like, holy shit,
that's hot. And these are handwritten notes that we are
having to pass secretly. And I love sneaking around like

(45:58):
anything elicit in the of night. I absolutely love.

Speaker 2 (46:04):
You're like Jack the Ripper. Just you don't kill Okay, go.

Speaker 1 (46:07):
Ahead, that's the story.

Speaker 3 (46:09):
Oh now sit there and keep your voices down during
the break, or else you will regret it. I've been
looking for the perfect opportunity to take someone's pants down
and spank their bare backside. Enjoy the rest of the episode.

Speaker 2 (46:29):
Besides old Man, besides spanking, you have other kings that
you really get into.

Speaker 1 (46:34):
Hair pulling. I love it. You can pull my hair
as hard as you want. It never hurts. And that's
something I've also liked since being a kid and I
didn't know what was sexual. So I have this best
friend who we met in first grade. Ever since first grade,
I would ask her, can you sit behind me so
you can pull my hair? And even to this day,
she knows I like to have my hair pulled. She

(46:55):
doesn't think it's sexual when she pulls it. It's not sexual.
It just feels good. I have a thick head of hair,
So I love that one. It's kind of random, you know.

Speaker 2 (47:05):
Back when I was in middle school, I sat with
my best friend. We were side by side. It was
two desks connected together, and right in front of us
just happened to be two of what I considered the
best butts in our class. In the back of the seat.
There was a big cutout, so I could always see
their butts hanging out of the back seat, and me
and my friend Walt would sit there and there they

(47:26):
were Chris and Heidi, two of the most fantastic butts.
It would have been great if, like when you asked
your friend, can you sit behind me and pull my hair?
If they just turned around to me and said, when
you're sitting behind us, can you rub our butts? That
would have been fantastic. It would have been really hard
to walk up to the chalkboard during class, but besides that,

(47:46):
it would have been a dream come true. Continue your story.

Speaker 1 (47:50):
Yeah, so hair pulling. I love to be choked. I
really like vibrators. Oh, I love vibrators, especially in those
years where I was having sex. I had packages coming
from Adam and Eve every other day, and I definitely
have fantasies about getting a vibrator used on me and
having the person tell me, you know, don't move and

(48:12):
then like holding me down or spanking me or even
slapping me across the face.

Speaker 2 (48:17):
Interesting.

Speaker 1 (48:20):
I like being man handled.

Speaker 2 (48:22):
Held down, older man handled.

Speaker 1 (48:25):
That's so preferred.

Speaker 2 (48:26):
Help.

Speaker 1 (48:27):
Yeah, if a man is younger than me, he actually
really doesn't stand a chance because it changes the way
that I act in that relationship so much. Because you're
so much older. I actually do have a hard time
disobeying you, and the power exchange then is more extreme
and it's almost a little bit scary, and it's really hot.

(48:49):
You find me scary, not you anymore. But but for
younger guys, then I will be such a brat, am
really dominating. If someone's not taking charge in the way
that I think they should, I will take control of
the situation. And once that happens, you probably can't get

(49:11):
the control back.

Speaker 2 (49:12):
So it's kind of a turn off for you at
that point, and.

Speaker 1 (49:15):
I think the guy too, usually.

Speaker 2 (49:17):
Unless that's what their whole goal is, to be dominated, right, right,
So what about these men that you've run into throughout
your life. Has anybody had a kink that they tried
to get you to be involved in yes, and this.

Speaker 1 (49:34):
Was very problematic because we weren't practicing any type of communication.
This was a guy I dated when I was twenty four.
He was someone I had met at my church, and
it was definitely a sexually abusive relationship. However, the stuff
that happened was so absurd that I do have to
laugh about it sometimes so that I don't cry. And

(49:56):
it was not okay for him to coerce me into
doing all of this. This was a totally insane time
in my life. I didn't know anything about consent. I
had a lot of sexual shame. I had a lot
of unresolved trauma. I was struggling with addiction. That was
one of the things that me and the sky had
in common. Anyways, into the kinks, so I guess the
first one started. He did not want me to shower,

(50:21):
and we would work out a lot together. He was
a personal trainer, and he'd also force me to work
out and ask me every single thing. I ate every
single day, and I struggle with eating disorders, so that's
really problematic. And at certain points I was even hiding
food from this man. I don't know if I've told
you that He also would bring his own meat to

(50:43):
dinner when he dined with my family and wouldn't eat
our food and judged us hard.

Speaker 2 (50:48):
What did your family think about that?

Speaker 1 (50:50):
My family is so desensitized to crazy stuff that they
really didn't think much of it. So this was during
the pandemic, and so he wouldn't wear a mask unless
I kept that mask in my underwear and worked out
in it and sweated in it, and then he would
wear it because he liked how it smelled. That was

(51:12):
the only way I could get this man to wear
a mask.

Speaker 2 (51:14):
Well, you were doing your part, That's.

Speaker 1 (51:17):
What I was just thinking. But he showered, so it
was a bit of a double standard. But he didn't
want me to shower.

Speaker 2 (51:25):
Did you not want him to shower?

Speaker 1 (51:27):
After we would work out, he'd be like, please, don't shower,
and I'd be like, well, then let's just keep hanging out.
But he'd be like, no, I need to go home
and shower, but I don't want you to shower, and
I want to come back and go down on you.
And basically all he wanted to do was eat ass.
But if I was on my period, then he wanted
to go down on me because he believed that my

(51:49):
period blood possessed magic powers.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
Wow, well, that's not really a fetish, that's.

Speaker 1 (51:56):
Just a thing a philosophy.

Speaker 2 (51:57):
Actually, yeah, I guess so.

Speaker 1 (52:02):
I wasn't really comfortable doing any of these things. But
the second I express any hesitation, it was very attacking
and berating, and he'd get really irritated. That's the part
that's not okay, because he was also really intimidating. He
was really strong, and basically he could not hear no.

(52:24):
Part of consent is not only saying no, but then
the other person has to accept that no graciously, and
he was never capable of doing that. So time and
time again, I'd be coerced into doing this because he'd
say that it was a deal breaker for him if
I didn't, and even if my period flow wasn't very heavy,
he'd be getting mad at me and saying, are you

(52:46):
holding out on me?

Speaker 2 (52:47):
Wow?

Speaker 1 (52:48):
It really was an extreme I also never saw his penis.
He never showed it to me. But I guess the
one silver lining in all of this is he would
slap my ass alot, and he really liked it, and
so at least while he was eating my ass, Even
though I hated it, he'd be spanking me, and so
that was what I got out of it.

Speaker 2 (53:08):
You know, ass eating is a delicacy in some countries.

Speaker 1 (53:14):
Truly, though I do struggle to let people go down
on me. I don't like eating ass. Oh my god,
I haven't even gotten to the glass butt plug.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
Yeah, the next question.

Speaker 1 (53:25):
Eventually he orders me this absolutely massive glass butt plug.
I've shown you pictures. It's big, right big to me,
but this is bigger's huge.

Speaker 2 (53:37):
It's it's like a centerpiece.

Speaker 1 (53:38):
It is a centerpiece, and it's been used as a
centerpiece in my tea parties that I've posted for my
friends since. But the butt plug was ultimately the straw
that broke the camel's back because it was so big,
and he would get so mad at me that I
couldn't fit it, and then he would also get mad
that I wasn't practicing with it. And so we dated
for six months and then it and died. I wasn't

(54:02):
able to advocate for myself, and how fucked up all
this was the whole time. So I held it all
in until the end, and then I yelled at this
man like you cannot believe. I yelled at him so
intensely and just that all the bad things he did
that he told me he had realized he could never
date anybody again because of what he puts them through.

(54:24):
And then he moved across state lines.

Speaker 2 (54:27):
Not to say that this guy's crazy for what he likes,
but the forceing on you, obviously, that's where the bad
part comes in.

Speaker 1 (54:34):
And I guess just one last thing to say about
that crazy X is that when we took a trip together,
I looked in his suitcase and it was ninety percent
full of cans of sardines. He got sardines through the
International border Patrol.

Speaker 2 (54:51):
Like did they look?

Speaker 1 (54:51):
I think about that all the time because in that
airport they were really stricted. You couldn't bring food. This
was an international trip, so I don't know.

Speaker 2 (55:00):
Perhaps sardines was on the list of acceptable Contraband do
you think that over the years having these spanking thoughts,
there's been times where you would have preferred that you
never even got this spanking gene.

Speaker 1 (55:14):
At times, yes, now definitely not, especially because sex is
so complicated for me now and I feel like I
still have spanking. It's kind of like a gift.

Speaker 2 (55:27):
I think like a lot of spanko's out there, We
would mostly choose spanking over sex, although you do like
to get out there and get busy. I know this,
and so do these people out here. But is that true?
You would still take spanking over sex.

Speaker 1 (55:40):
Absolutely, It's so much easier.

Speaker 2 (55:42):
Because you could still take yourself in hand. I would
never take that away from anyone. That's always part of
the option.

Speaker 1 (55:49):
And you're never going to stop me from flicking my beings.

Speaker 2 (55:51):
I would never, And I hate when you say it.
Would you say that? I find that a little cringey.
If someone never said that to me again for the
rest of my life, I'd be okay with that too,
But you say it all the time. And I know
you like to push guys buttons. I know you do that. Yeah,
I doe not that you have a ton of experience
with this, but you definitely could probably speak to it

(56:13):
because you know everything about consent and this guy was
not really getting your consent. He was basically telling you,
this is what you need to do to be with me.
If you don't do it, we're not together and you
were going through a confusing time. But how would you
recommend someone who's into this spanking thing. How would you
recommend them get a friend or someone in a relationship

(56:35):
to try this out with them.

Speaker 1 (56:37):
I would say the first step, before you even think
about talking to someone about it, you need to talk
to yourself about it, and you have to get to
the place where you're just ready to fearlessly and unapologetically
own it, because once you take that control over it,
people can't weaponize it against you anymore. So I think

(56:58):
that's the really important first step in terms of getting
someone to spank you. I actually used the exact advice
from the episode with the Kink Consultant. You guys gave
great advice about how to set up a profile, which
is actually what I did. Her independent podcast, The Kink Consultants,

(57:19):
she has a great episode with the founder of Meat Kinksters,
the dating app. I think the advice from those two
episodes is better than anything I could give. But what
I did I had just moved out of my hometown
relatively recently, which was a big step in my healing journey.
So I found a safe space where I'm like, Okay,
nobody's around here anymore. What if there are like some

(57:43):
really hot guys around that actually want to spank me?

Speaker 2 (57:46):
Believe me there are plenty of people around that would
like to spank you.

Speaker 1 (57:51):
So I downloaded Meat Kinksters. I also downloaded Field Do
you know Field? No, you're so old.

Speaker 2 (57:59):
As you stated.

Speaker 1 (58:01):
So those are two kinky apps, and I took the
exact advice, you know, be as honest on those apps
as possible. My name is Elsa on there, and because
my profile was so honest, then I ended up matching
with the Pleasure Don Sebastian in December. So that was
the first person who spanked me outside of you. And

(58:24):
it was very different because, unlike with the Aussie guy,
I didn't tell Sebastian anything really that I liked. I
told him I had been spanked by a fifty seven
year old man, and that was pretty much it.

Speaker 2 (58:34):
You couldn't just say a man no.

Speaker 1 (58:37):
It's just the age is so exciting and so important,
and the fact that he's forty nine is really exciting
to me too. He's also married, He's in an ethically
non monogamous relationship. Him being married for some reason, really
turns me on. It also kind of makes me feel
safer that he's under a woman's supervision. You're not gonna

(58:59):
like this, and you actually might punish me for it.
I don't know. I made a really reckless decision at
the last minute, and I just threw caution.

Speaker 2 (59:07):
You've made several reckless decisions from your stories that you've
told me.

Speaker 1 (59:12):
I like reckless sexual activity, and that actually is a
symptom that sexual trauma survivors do deal with, so we
just have to be really careful with it. But it
definitely gets me going. So we were going to meet
at a coffee shop in December. Okay, December's a really
hard month for me. I don't have a great relationship

(59:35):
with my family, so the holidays are really hard and
I was really struggling during this time. So this day
that I met him, I was so stressed out that
actually my hair was falling out. That's how stressed out.
I was just about life, and so it probably wasn't
the ideal day to meet up with someone new like this,

(59:55):
but I really wanted someone to slap the shit out
of me. I thought I would feel a lot better,
and I knew that this man was very willing.

Speaker 2 (01:00:03):
You might want to take the slap to shit out
of you out of your report.

Speaker 1 (01:00:07):
Right, because it could be literal. Yeah, I know, I
think about that. So we were supposed to meet at
a coffee shop, but he lives over an hour away
from me, and on the way there, I just realized
that I didn't have as much time as I thought
I did, and so I asked him if he would
call me, and we pretty much just talked on the phone,
and then I was like, Okay, well, I feel comfortable

(01:00:29):
to just come to your house. It made me horny
that it was so dangerous, but I do regret it
because it also made me really scared, which was part
of the excitement. But I think I went a little
too far, to be honest. So I got to his house,
he was, you know, exactly like his pictures. Now, this
man is very intimidating. He might be the most intimidating

(01:00:52):
person I've ever met in my life. So we talked.
I was terrified, but really horny and attracted him. He's
been doing BDSM for thirty years, so that's longer than
I've even been alive. And then we played and we
did a lot, and he spanked me very differently than
a spanko would spank, even though he does identify with

(01:01:15):
being a spanker. The first time he spanked me. It
was so hard that first hit. It truly shocked me,
and he just spanked me insanely hard that entire time.
It was really really hot and I was whimpering and
probably close to crying. And then those hits left such

(01:01:36):
specific marks and that just turned me on so much.
Can I show you a picture of my butt from
the first time that Sebastian spank.

Speaker 2 (01:01:44):
I would love to see this picture because I know
if I said, wait till after a podcast, you'll be like,
I'd like to hear your reaction on the podcast. Was
his wife right downstairs.

Speaker 1 (01:01:54):
No, but he does tell her about it.

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
Wow, he really spanked your entire butt.

Speaker 1 (01:01:59):
He spanks high than you do.

Speaker 2 (01:02:01):
Yeah, definitely, and it's.

Speaker 1 (01:02:02):
Very exciting and I really liked it. This was some
of the aftermath. The bruises are so important.

Speaker 2 (01:02:10):
That's some marking.

Speaker 1 (01:02:11):
Yeah, I've seen him two times since then and he
has not spanked me that hard since. But just being
honest on the app that worked really well for me.
It's like asking, you shall receive. And then I had
a very similar field profile when I matched with the
Australian guy. I did tell him in person, face to face,

(01:02:33):
and I was awkward as hell, but it was totally
worth it.

Speaker 2 (01:02:37):
Because now he's given you the best banking you've ever had,
right disgusting. So about this question, which I ask a
lot of people, what advice would you give to other
spankos out there that are having a hard time accepting
this whole spanking thing.

Speaker 1 (01:02:53):
The advice I'd give to anyone who's struggling to accept
the fact that they like spanking is one know that
we don't have control over what we are attracted to
in that way, and it's going to make you miserable
if you're not honest with yourself about it, just like
anything else. I know from my journey how toxic sexual

(01:03:16):
shame can be and just the chronic distress that it
can actually cause inside of someone. So I genuinely believe
that you will be healthier if you embrace that you
like spanking and if you can't imagine acting on it now,
I mean, you aren't listening to this podcast, so I'm
sure you're engaging with other content. But I had that

(01:03:36):
year of just being honest with myself about the porn
I like, I used to not even want to type
in spanking. I would type in other stuff that I
knew might have a butt slap and just go back
to that one little part over and over again. Even
though nobody can see what porn you're watching. I was
still having that shame for myself the second I leaned
into it. Life does just get better, and you don't

(01:03:59):
know the possibilities it can unlock. In our culture, people
fear their own sexuality. That's why people react to things
with such sexual disgust and judgment and shame is because
we're taught that all things pleasurable are bad. So what
I want to say to you is that it's not bad.

(01:04:20):
It's pleasurable. Pleasurable things aren't always bad, And if you're
practicing it with consent, I can't think of a better
example of how to do something safely and responsibly.

Speaker 2 (01:04:33):
It's a very good answer. Thanks, It's almost as if
you practiced it now. We're going to end this with
a little fun stuff.

Speaker 1 (01:04:43):
All right, let's do it.

Speaker 2 (01:04:44):
Are you ready? Because we're almost done here. We're going
to wrapping this thing up. If you can go back
to any period in time to get a spanking, where
are you going?

Speaker 1 (01:04:54):
And why I would need to be a princess in
a castle? That would be hot. Maybe my parents, the
King and Queen, sent me to like a sexy rugged
worker to spank me like a blacksmith or something.

Speaker 2 (01:05:08):
Because they don't want to get their own hands dirty.

Speaker 1 (01:05:10):
Yeah right, Yeah, that would be really hot.

Speaker 2 (01:05:14):
Would other people be around?

Speaker 1 (01:05:15):
Yeah? Why not?

Speaker 2 (01:05:19):
I don't really want to go back to that time
because I just think it was unsanitary.

Speaker 1 (01:05:23):
That's what I think. It would probably smell that.

Speaker 2 (01:05:26):
Your friend would love that, though, true, if I asked
him that same question, this is where he'd be going
back to.

Speaker 1 (01:05:33):
He was all about the flavor.

Speaker 2 (01:05:38):
Would you take a spanking instead of a speeding ticket
from a police officer?

Speaker 1 (01:05:43):
I guess would.

Speaker 2 (01:05:45):
You take the spanking if you knew that the video
would be played over and over on public access television
for all to see?

Speaker 1 (01:05:54):
Sure?

Speaker 2 (01:05:55):
Would you take this spanking if it was going to
be played on public access for all to see but
it was done by one of your parents?

Speaker 1 (01:06:03):
Oh? Good lord?

Speaker 2 (01:06:06):
No, that's where you draw the line.

Speaker 1 (01:06:09):
That's where I draw the line.

Speaker 2 (01:06:11):
Do you have a spanking bucket list?

Speaker 1 (01:06:13):
Yes? I think we all probably know this of coming
to terms with liking spanking, But sometimes when you're the
most scared of something, it's because that's the thing you
really want the most. And I think the thing I
most intimidated with would be being spanked in front of anybody,
and I think that's also probably the thing that I

(01:06:35):
want the most. However, the Aussi tourist, he lives in
Bali and he goes to this sexy club in Bali
and he said he could spank me there. So that's
intriguing to me because I wouldn't know anybody over there,
and I just had this really hot guy that I
feel safe with who would spank me in front of people.

(01:06:57):
So I am considering that. But he's like, you're not
actually gonna come to Bali. And I said, if anybody
would take a crazy trip like that, it is me,
and you know that.

Speaker 2 (01:07:08):
And the whole way, you'd be turned on about it.

Speaker 1 (01:07:13):
And I just have to say the fact that I
am acting like this horny little slut, I guess this
is a huge step for me, which I'm sure you
can see, because it's like I was shut down with
my sexuality and this brought me back out of my shell.

Speaker 2 (01:07:31):
I was the first person to touch your skin in
two years.

Speaker 1 (01:07:34):
Yeah, and I wasn't even that crazy and horny back then,
but I've gotten so much more alive again.

Speaker 2 (01:07:41):
I'd like to say that it all came about because
of my spanking. Absolutely, so, like you're saying, go to
Bali and be spanked at this sex club in front
of all these people. The very first time that Riley
got a spanking in front of only one person, and
it was another spank she was embarrassed as hell, but

(01:08:03):
so excited that it happened. But that was in front
of one spanko. But she had just met the girl.
She had a choice. She had to go stand in
the corner for I think it was half the time
that she was late, or take a spanking right then
and there. And she had just been introduced to this girl,
they just met each other. She took this spanking funny

(01:08:23):
as hell because halfway through her spanking I told the
girl who she had just meant to go get a
wooden spoon. This girl did not flinch. She had a
big evil grin on her face as she walked to
get that wooden spoon and hand to me to spank
this girl she doesn't even know. And then probably within
an hour, we're all out there having a couple drinks

(01:08:44):
and eating.

Speaker 1 (01:08:45):
That's crazy. I'd be more comfortable being spanked in front
of other men than other women. And it's funny because
I live a very girl's girl, you know, empowered women lifestyle.
I don't even really have that many men in my life,
but when it comes to my sexual life, it's like
a complete switch because I'll be outraged for days about

(01:09:06):
being degraded as a woman, and then when I come
into this sexual sphere, I really actually like being degraded.
And the other thing I didn't mention is that I
do like talking dirty, and I've been shocked, honestly by
some of the things that have come out of my mouth.

Speaker 2 (01:09:22):
Well, you have talked dirty on this podcast, like when
you were not able to shower.

Speaker 1 (01:09:29):
That's true.

Speaker 2 (01:09:30):
Oh, you definitely with your texts that you send me.
I'm like, what is she doing now? All right? So
this is the last question. It only has to do
with spanking, nothing else. I know exactly what you would
do this thing, but this is just to do a spanking.
You're gifted a very lifelike AI robot just to do

(01:09:55):
a spanking. What would you program this robot to do?

Speaker 1 (01:10:00):
Oh my gosh, this is kind of a hard question.

Speaker 2 (01:10:03):
Would you program this thing to be a disciplinarian to
actually correct your behavior through spanking?

Speaker 1 (01:10:09):
It's funny. I like disciplinary spankings, but I don't actually
want to be disciplined, if that makes sense. So I
wouldn't want the robot to catch me doing something bad
and then spank me for it, but I would like
the nature of the spanking to be disciplinary. I love
over the knee spanking so much. But now that that
Australian guy spanked me against the wall like that, I

(01:10:32):
have not stopped thinking about that spanking sense. Do you
think you'd be able to spank me like that?

Speaker 2 (01:10:38):
Would I be able to spank you while you're against
the wall. I don't know. I guess i'd have to
learn how to do it. It sounds so different. Is there
anything else you would program this robot to do?

Speaker 1 (01:10:55):
Flick my bean?

Speaker 2 (01:11:00):
Is there anything that we have not mentioned on this
podcast that you'd like to say? Right now?

Speaker 1 (01:11:05):
You can friend me on fet life. I just made
an account. It's underscore, Elsa. I only have two friends
right now, you and Sebastian. Did you see that I
had one other friend when you added me?

Speaker 2 (01:11:18):
I don't even think I looked I can't be bothered
with that. I got so much going on. She's got
another friend.

Speaker 1 (01:11:26):
I mean, I only have two friends. In terms of
responding to messages from guys, that is pretty intimidating for
me right now. It's hard for me to accept the
fact that people are gonna look at me in a
sexual way, even though I've just been talking about sex
and being super horny for two hours. It's complicated. I

(01:11:48):
definitely would love to connect with some women, you know,
especially if you relate to my story. So that just
about sums it up. Thank you for having me. I
hope I am entertained.

Speaker 2 (01:12:01):
That was underscore ELSA. Yes, and that's on fet life. Yes,
and especially if there's an older woman out here that
might want to spank you. And you know, if that
older woman wants to come and she's up here in
the Northeast and she wants to come to my place
to spank you, I would be more than happy to
set that up.

Speaker 1 (01:12:20):
That would be fun.

Speaker 2 (01:12:22):
That would be fun for me. I could do the
whole day hands off and just watch.

Speaker 1 (01:12:26):
Yeah, you need a break, you're busy.

Speaker 2 (01:12:28):
That's right. I'm older too, and I'm not getting any younger.
But I appreciate you doing this. I never thought you
were going to do this because I remember when I
first asked you, you were like, I don't think I'm
ready for that. I don't think i'll ever be ready
for that. And then you were the one that told
me that you're ready to do an episode, and I
got you in here, and we're probably going to do

(01:12:49):
some more spanking today, if that's okay with you. I'm
looking for consent here, I hope.

Speaker 1 (01:12:53):
So maybe you can take some more pictures of me,
because you take amazing photos.

Speaker 2 (01:12:59):
If she starts posting these pictures that I've taken for
her on fet life, you guys are going to see
that it is a great view. She has some really
good pictures that she has not shared to the world yet.

Speaker 1 (01:13:12):
True, and you never know, because I changed my mind
for this podcast, and I could certainly change my mind
about the pictures.

Speaker 2 (01:13:19):
I want to thank you very much for doing this podcast.
It was a lot of fun. I think people out
there are going to at times they're going to be like,
what the hell is going on here? But I think
they're going to really enjoy this. But thank you very
much for doing this.

Speaker 1 (01:13:31):
Thank you for having me.

Speaker 2 (01:13:33):
Why don't you say goodbye to everybody out there?

Speaker 1 (01:13:35):
Bye everyone, all.

Speaker 2 (01:13:37):
Right, everybody. That wraps up another episode of the Never
too Old for a Good Spanking Podcast. I will see
you next time.