Episode 0000253: Derek Hynes

In this episode, I talk to Irish born Derek Hynes, about his many travels across this great big world, finally settling in Holland for a time, but he is planning his next big move. Which country beckons his call? Have a listen - this is Derek's story!


Music featured on this episode (intro) by Matthew Johnston 
https://soundcloud.com/user-234321408

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Nobodies are somebodies, so I havedescended from having a buff. So catch
me. I'm falling baby, fallingin love with them. Nobody's are Somebody's
podcast with me chad vice show.This one is with Derek Hines. Conversation

(00:26):
I had with this gentleman hailing fromoriginally from Ireland, living in Holland for
now, although maybe by the timeyou hear this, or he hears this,
he'll have moved to Canada. Idon't know why. Well, actually
I do know why. He'll describemaybe portions of that here in the conversation,
but we'll get down to that.This guy's travel a lot, and

(00:46):
he's found that Nobody's or Somebody's podcaston the internet and he wanted to be
a guest and reached and reached outto me. And I'm very thankful that
he did, and I'm happy tohave his conversation and I'm happy to have
you listen to his converse station.So let's get down to it in a
few minutes. But first, alittle anecdote from my life. That's right.
I can't not start I can't notstart and Nobody's or Somebody's podcast episode

(01:11):
without talking about something that happens inmy life. So I was in a
McDonald's as I usually am with mytwo youngest boys, Sebastian and Cameron,
because life is going swell and we'reinto fine dining. So we were at
McDonald's after school after I picked themup at high school because they love to
eat that stuff after school. Ican't recommend it, but hey, they're

(01:33):
down with it and it's quality timewith the boys. What can I say,
fine dining side. This was duringthe time of McDonald's Monopoly, when
they were doing that promotion. I'mpretty sure that only runs in the US
and Canada. It could be allover the world, could be wrong,
but let's just say for that's onlyin North America. But this was during
the Monopoly time. So we're sittingthere and at this time, they have

(01:53):
all like the monopoly colored balloons,like the black and the blue and the
whites, and the I think there'syellow and definitely yellow and blue the Monopoly
colors right of the money and thegame board, so it's got that style.
Balloon's all in the ceiling right withall the Monopoly propaganda that you'll see
everywhere. In case you didn't know, it's McDonald's Monopoly. They'll shove it

(02:15):
in your face every five seconds whenyou step two feet through the door,
and every moment thereafter, so youcan't help but notice it. But anyway,
we were sitting there having our deliciousburgers and a woman walks in with
her I guess maybe three four orfive year old kid. Maybe he was
twenty, he was three to fouryears old, whatever, his young kid.
And the kid looks at the balloonsand he's like, oh, wow,

(02:37):
balloons. Look at the balloons.Mommy, what's going on here?
I'm paraphrasing a bit. I swearto god this is her answer. I
swear to god. She was like, I don't know, sweetie. I
think it's McDonald's birthday or something.No, you don't have to adjust your

(03:00):
volume. Don't adjust your podcast.That was me leaving silence for you to
process what I just said. Shesaw those monopoly balloons, and not just
the balloons, but the monopoly signs, the words Monopoly, as if McDonald's
doesn't have that already Monopoly everywhere,like the game boards, the game pieces,
Like, I mean, you don'thave to play Monopoly to know what

(03:22):
it is. Okay, it's oneof those culture things where you don't have
to like it, you just knowwhat it is, like the sound of
my voice, like the band ACDC. You know who they are. You
don't have to like them, youjust know what they are. And I
don't know if when or ever McDonaldI don't even know when McDonald's birthday actually
is, like the start, likethe creation, do they even celebrate Does

(03:45):
McDonald's even celebrate its birthday? Idon't know. I've never seen it.
I know they celebrate their ninety ninemillion, ninety nine billion burgers sold.
They promote the shit out of that. But I've never seen a McDonald's birthday
party. And I'm sure it's inwhat fifty years, sixty years since nineteen
fifty something that it first appeared,Like I'm talking to the first door across

(04:06):
the US, the first stores acrossthe US. I'm pretty sure McDonald's has
never celebrated a birthday, or ifthey have, I missed it. I
don't know when it is. Wecan google that, obviously, but I've
never never seen it. But doesthis woman actually think or she just trying
to be like maybe because she didn'tthink her son knew what monopoly was,
but it sounded like she didn't knowand just made up something in her head,

(04:28):
like it must be because balloons arebirthdays, right, so it must
be McDonald's birthday. No, it'smonopoly. It's corporate, cold, disheartening
monopoly. Don't lie to your kids, tell them the truth. McDonald's and

(04:54):
monopoly will suck your soul. Allright, this is my conversation with Derek
Hines here on the Nobody's Are Somebody'spodcast. Derek, I'm sorry for this,
but thank you so much for yourconversation, and y'all gonna enjoy it.
And there we go, Derek,it's good to have your conversation.

(05:14):
Welcome and I'm glad you reached outto me. Thanks Chad. Good to
be here. Yeah, yeah,for sure. First question I guess is
how did you find the podcast?How'd you find me here? I was
just a random Facebook page. I'vedone a few podcasts before and your one
popped up and I said that looksinteresting. Well, thank you so much.
I'm glad the Facebook posts do workand people do actually see them.

(05:35):
I never know where people see what. I'm always trying to figure that out.
You have a very interesting story.I can't wait to hear a lot
about a lot of fascinating points thatyou mentioned in the email. But starting
off right now, you're in Hollandright now, tell me about what's going
on in Holland right now. How'slife like for you right there? Right
Life is good. Yeah, thisis the second time I've lived here in

(05:58):
mastrict. I mean when I sayit's hot and everyone thinks and you know,
it's all Amsterdam about two and ahalf hours from Amsterdam, it's it's
it's more like a French village thana Dutch city. Fantastic, of course.
I hear the Irish accent Ireland wasyour home place. I do believe
correct, Yeah, it is.Indeed, I basically have the DNA of

(06:18):
a potential. I'm just pure Irish. Nice, nice nice. So the
earliest thing that you told me aboutthat we could talk about going back all
the way is your your father's yourfamily business, growing up the bakery,
the candy store, having a familybusiness. That's always been a cool thing
to want to hear about. Inever have, but people that grew up

(06:39):
in a family business like that,I always find that fascinating. So I'd
like to hear about about your experiencewith that. Well, it does have
its advantages, and it's the disadvantages, you know, because I mean,
when your dad's your boss, youknow, it's still your dad, you
know, and that. Yeah,but it is. It was wonderful.
It was. It was kind kindof like people always say, you know,

(07:00):
we lived above a candy store anda bakery, and you know,
it's about one hundred and five yearsof business now the bakery has gone about
twenty years, and my mother's continuingon the candy store. And yeah,
it was kind of cool growing up. You were used to it when you
were growing up. It wasn't anovelty to grow up above a candy store
because we always did. Yeah,and the bakery was there as well.

(07:25):
You know, so I should reallyhave like about fifteen different types of diabetes
by now, but I don't.So I'm lucky you got to. They
made you sample all the candy andall the baking goods to make sure they're
right for sale. Yeah, that'sbasically yes, that was you know,
as a child. You know,otherwise it's slave labor. So it's great.
That can't be Yeah, that can'tbe too bad at all, for

(07:46):
sure. Those worse things in life, Yeah, exactly how long did you
end up staying. I assume thatyou worked there from as long as young
as you could be until until somethingelse changed. Right, how long were
you there for, like actually workingfor your dad? Oh? Well,
I was working, you know,as a kid, you help out and
all that. And then I dida lot of bar work when I was
old enough to do that, andhead off to college for a year.

(08:09):
But then I finished college or no, I finished college. I just I
quit after the first year and Imoved. I ended up moving to Mastrict
to where I'm living now, justfor a new adventure. When I was
nineteen years old, it was arandom guy told me about a place that
offered jobs all over Europe, andMasterrik popped up and I got a job

(08:30):
in an Irish bear there. Andthat was your first time I guess going
anywhere outside of Ireland was going toHolland. Oh I traveled a huge amount,
but never never really as never tolive somewhere else before to another country.
And how long were you there forthe first time. I was there
for three years, three and ahalf years. You know, when you're

(08:52):
nineteen, you're young and stupid.I'm back now I'm older, and probably
even more stupid, but stupid anotherway. So you have world experience now
too to add to it. Sothat helps a little bit. And to
kind of say, you know,if you can live your life over again,
knowing what you know, you wouldn'tmake the same mistakes. Now that's
bullshit. I im proof that it'snot hurt crap, you know, just

(09:16):
make different mistakes. Yeah, exactly, But hopefully you can get back on
your feet a little bit sooner,a little bit quicker. You try to
make improvements quicker as you get older. Yeah, you know, there is
hindsight. It's great as well,you know. Yeah, absolutely. Where
did it take you? Yeah?So where did it take you? After
that? You were nineteen years old? You're working at a bar in Holland.

(09:37):
Where you are now, what wasthe next step for you? Like
you were you going to maintain yourwhole life there? Were you looking to
start a career there, go backinto school? What was did you have
a goal back then? Or isit just working to stay alive? Yeah?
Just working to go out and enjoyyourself, you know. And I
think when you're nineteen, you don'tthink about mortgages and you don't think about
you know, pensions and all thosekind of things, just you know,

(10:00):
day by day heading out and enjoyingyourself. We used to spend a lot
of time in Belgian nightclubs. We'reright on the border, and I realized
that, you know, Holland,I moved here and I was a huge
fan of house music, and Ithink the first night I went out in
Mastrict, I realized that Dutch studentshave an affinity for abba, which I

(10:22):
did not sign up for. Andthen then someone told me, you know
that the real nightclubs are in Belgium. So that's where we spent most of
our Saturday nights. I can imagine, just well only from watching movies,
what those would be like. Butwhat kind of was it? What would
you say if you've been to obviouslyAmerica, You've been around the world a
lot of different places nightclubs, whatwould you say is the major difference in

(10:43):
Belgium versus where you come from asfar as the nightclub scene? What's it
like there? Belgium is funny,It's like there's no rules, you know,
it's just it's I don't even know. Is that the real country?
And I've been there because I mean, when you talk to Belgians. The
three more famous Belgians in the worldare her Cool Parole, Inspector McGray,

(11:07):
and Tintin. They're all imaginary characters. Yeah, I've been to Belgium.
I'm pretty sure it's a real place. But I just think it's just a
bunch of nightclubs and a lot ofcrazy people. But it's a great place.
It's a great place. Yeah,definitely. It's a good tourist place
too. I mean the people thatlive there too, But it's a good

(11:30):
place to go and visit and todefinitely sink into a different culture. I
would say, oh yeah. Andit's it's split. It's split too,
really. It's Flemish speaking is closeto Dutch and then the French speak in
part, so they're two like separatecountries in one. All right, right,
yeah, that makes sense, thatmakes sense. Where did it take
you after that? You decide eventuallyto leave Belgium? Where did you go

(11:50):
next? Move back to Ireland?You know? I I head back to
Ireland then, and you know,I had some personal issues and ended up
going back to Ireland and just tosee, you know, gather and and
see where i'd go next. AndI ended up working in the family business
and going back to university for fora couple of years at night, and

(12:11):
then and then I stayed. Iended up staying in Ireland a lot,
or stayed there and then you know, traveling a lot. But always had
that want to go somewhere else,you know, not to run away from
things, but just to experience newthings. Was it a desire to go
to a specific place or just keeptraveling all over the globe. But yeah,
I always when we when we werekids, you know, my parents

(12:33):
worked very hard and all that,but every summer for two weeks, we'd
hop in the car and we getthe boat to France and then it was
a tent on the roof and wejust you know, my dad and mom
had decide, you know, maybewe'll go to Switzerland, maybe we'll go
to Austria. And you know,we ended up getting lost in the Pyrenees
once and ended up in Barcelona,which became a favorite spot of ours.

(12:58):
You know. So it is Ialways had that travel the book, the
travel book. Yeah, we hadthat experience. There's a lot of kids
don't A lot of people don't getthat right. A lot of people are
stuck in their own little province,their own little country, their own little
section right their own little quarter.They don't get to do that. You're
very fortunate you got that kind ofexposure. You were able to go everywhere.
Yeah. So I did a lotof travel and one of the things

(13:20):
was I ended up, you know, I ended up going to Barcelona a
lot to watch my football team playthe cheap flights and heading out there and
staying in friends' houses. And I'ma huge Twin Peaks fan, massive Twin
Peaks fan, and started going tothe Twin Peaks Festival in London when the
when the TV show came back,and ended up joining the cult, which

(13:43):
which I need to explain, wasnot an actual cult, but I'm a
huge Twin Peaks, a Twin Peakscult or just a this was This was
from from the author from Fight Club, Chuck Poulinik. I went to see
him in Gowi City and years agoand there was a guy outside it and

(14:05):
he was telling us all how hewas going to pick a fight with the
author of Fight Club just for infamy. He didn't end up picking a fight
with them, but he mentioned thiswebsite called the Cult, which was from
Chuck Paulinick and he said, youknow, it's pretty hardcore and all these
people hang out there. So Iwent home and I joined it the next
day, and it ended up nobodyreally talked and pardon the cliche, nobody

(14:26):
talked about fight club, nobody talkedabout the author. It was a bunch
of alternative kind of people hanging outon a website. Sounds geeky as hell,
but I ended up getting to knowa lot of these people really,
really well. And it was twothousand and eight. I decided to head
off to America and meet up withthem all in New York for the first

(14:48):
time. Nice everyone from that group, everyone from the club. You met
them online, you met them inperson for the first time. Yeah,
a lot of them. You know. My friend, one of my friends
was from Chicago, guy called Frank, and he flew out to meet up.
And then there was people that camefrom all over America. There was
like twenty of us hanging out inNew York and it was a wonderful experience,

(15:11):
which led me to visiting Frank inChicago and led me to visit and
the other guys in Los Angeles aswell. So being part of a geeky
forum ended up opening up the worldto me. Yeah. Absolutely, So
that was your first trip to Americathen, correct, Yes, it was
indeed. Yeah, yeah. Didyou live in Did you live in New

(15:33):
York or did you live in La? Oh No, never lived in either
of them. No, just wentto visit. Okay, okay, yeah,
I went to visit. You know, I don't know, could I
handle living in New York. It'syou know, it's it's it's a great
place to visit, but you know, everywhere is great to visit, but
to live to hectic? Yeah?Absolutely. Did anything come of the fight
club date? And anyone get inthe actual fights or is it just basically

(15:58):
no, there was no fighting,but the was There was a lot of
really cool you know. I meanI went to New York that first time.
I ended up in Chicago that summer, and up till before COVID,
I used to go to Chicago everyevery summer for a week or two and
then head out to LA to meetup with some of the others. So
that was a lot of good stuffcame out of that. And that's how

(16:21):
did you travel? And he didthat? Did you arrange the state someone's
place? Did you just go fromplace to place? Did you have did
you rent an apartment? How didyou kind of facilita yourself when you were
there? Oh, in Chicago,stayed with my buddy Frank. I had
my own room and he had anaptly named dog called Sinatra, who only
got to see once a year andwould yet knew when I was approaching the

(16:42):
house and would jump up all overme, you know, because I'm a
cat owner, so I'm not usedto affection from pets. So this,
you know, a dog to comeover to you and and welcome you every
time, you know. That wasThat was a totally different experience. But
I became like part of their familyand everything. That's very very cool,
very cool. For those that don'tknow what Twin Peaks was or is,

(17:03):
do you want to explain what thatTV show was about? Just for people
listening, you're asking me to explainTwin Peaks. That's that's the whole idea
of Twin Peaks. It it's beyondpeople who aren't born or people who don't
know and people didn't watch it.I knew of the show. I was
I wasn't watching it back then,but I know in the nineties it was
a big thing. I know,songs based around it too, But it's

(17:26):
a it's a it was a bigdeal. I know that, and it
was it was kind of like afront runner for the Sopranos, and it
was where you know, it wasn'ta soap opera. Was it a horror
was it you know? I wantto say, yeah, yeah, it
was totally different. It was DavidLynch, so you know you're going to

(17:47):
get totally different stuff. But it'sthe greatest TV show of all time.
I'll fight any man, woman,or child that disagrees with me over that.
But well, for those who don'tknow, go check it out.
There's a real There was the relaunchof that though correct direct there was indeed,
yeah, about five six years ago, which was it was a surreal
experience watching Twin Peaks. When itcame back on television. There were there

(18:11):
was rumors that fell apart, andthen it was like it's coming back.
He's gathering the cast. And Iremember it was a Sunday night it started
and it was live in America atabout I don't know, ten at night,
so it was like three in themorning for me, and I waited
up just to watch the opening creditsto go it's back, went to bed
and watched it properly the next thenext day after work, and it was

(18:34):
a real surreal experience to see itback on television. I see, And
at least you could do that nowtoday's modern technology. Back in ninety two
ninety three, when it aired wheneverbefore you you if you missed it,
then if you didn't stay up,you you lost it until next week.
You you couldn't get unless unless yourecorded it on a VCR. Yeah,
and then you had to guard theVCR so that nobody came in and changed

(18:55):
the channel exactly. Yeah, I'vehad that happen, that's true. Yeah,
yeah, yeah, that's worse thannickelback when someone does that, that's
that's horrendom Yeah, I love it. That's amazing. Did you say you
hung out with the cast of thator do you met them? Is that?
Did I get that correct? Idid? Oh God, I did?
I did? I did. Iwent to the I went to the
Twin Peaks Festival in London and itstarted years before, but I discovered it

(19:21):
when the TV show came back andI booked tickets for not knowing what it'll
be like exactly, and it was. It was when season three, the
return came out, so that itwas a bigger festival than usual. It
was a two day festival. Therewas seven of the cast there and one
of them was Audrey Horn, whichis Sherlin Fin Johnny dep SK's girlfriend.

(19:44):
Yes, you know, I thinkyou got both of the years ago,
you know, f HM or Maxim'smost Beautiful woman in the world. So
you know, I'm flying out toLondon, which is only a short trip.
Yes, you're thinking I'm going tobe meeting some of these people.
And it was so relaxed the wholeatmosphere because I thought it'd be they'd be

(20:06):
up on the stage. You know, you get to hear them. You
know. It's like when you goto a concert. You don't really see
Bono walking in with the guitar case, right, but you see him on
the stage and that's it unless youdo a meet and greet or pay for
that. Yeah, there wasn't meetand greet, but there was a stage
where I arrived and one of theYoung Hawk, one of the iconic characters,

(20:26):
just walked down the corridor and saidhello to everyone. So it was
a hangar for two days with thecast, and I got to know one
of them, Sean Bolger, Andyou know, he said, next time
you're in LA, give me ashout for lunch, which I was thinking,
you know, I'll give him ashout. You know, it's usual,
give me a shout for lunch.But yeah, he's like, yeah,
tomorrow, see you at twelve o'clock. I'm bringing a few of the

(20:48):
cast with me. Wow. Andhe did, and he did, and
I told I got completely starstruck.I got Nicole's and the holl of Liberty.
Now that that can be excusable becausein the TV show she was the
last scene she was in her underweargetting murdered, and she's a stunning redhead.

(21:10):
So you know, I'm standing outsidethe restaurant in La and along comes
in Nicole Liberty and I'm like,okay, I didn't know she was coming
along. And then I'm sitting downbeside her, trying not to be socially
awkward and yet getting her name wrongfive times and she never corrected me.
So really good done. Yeah,well that's very very cool. It's a
good experience. That's cool. Doyou remember what you ate just for fun?

(21:36):
Oh this is funny. John Pirocello, who was deputy. Oh,
he was one of the deputies andshe was also in Barrie from HBO,
which is a fantastic TV show.It's it's kind of like when I said,
I'm out in Hollywood meeting these youknow, you think it's really ritzy
and all that. No, wewent to the farmer's market, and you

(21:56):
can tell times are tough on Hollywoodbecause we were getting the We were getting
all the you know, the Brazilianmeat onto a plate and he recommended that
I put a little bit of saladon it as well, because they charged
a half slid half meat. Soit wasn't exactly real lavish experience, but

(22:17):
he did tell me how to savea little bit of money. Yeah,
so it's worth your time. It'sa good experience and you get a few
life hacks. You can't beat that. Yeah, it was one of those
days I'll never forget. Yeah.Absolutely, What year was that, Sorry,
I was about ten years ago.No, it was about six years
ago. Yeah, just after theshow came out. Yeah, that's not

(22:40):
the first time, if I'm correct, that you had dinner or a coffee
or met someone in Hollywood too.You you've hung out with other people.
Yeah, I'm friends with a guycalled Tyler Knight. If anyone's under eighteen,
please do not do doing. He'sactually he was a part of Chuck's
cult as well. And yeah,and he's he's probably one of the most

(23:03):
fascinating people in all my life.He's he's a porn star. He's a
fifteen year veteran porn star that doesn'tact like one. And we we often
meet up when I'm out there andhave coffee, and he's such a geek.
We end up just talking about books. We're talking about movies. He
wrote a biography that's it's Burned YourShadow, Burn My Shadow, an amazing

(23:26):
book, and then he wrote ascience fiction novel as well. This is
like a guy that loves Star Trekand Star Wars and one of the you're
one of those people that makes mylife for Richard known them? How did
you? How did you meet him? Met him through the through the cult,
he through the forum, he joinedit, he said who he was,

(23:47):
and people were like, really,you know, is this just an
old account? Ye? And he'syou know, so we end up talking.
We don't really talk about his dayjob, and he you know,
he's he's easily if you put themin a room of random people. Of
one hundred people, he'd easily bein the top five percent in intelligence and
just a very captivating guy, andpeople probably wouldn't right off the bat recognize

(24:11):
them either, I would think,I mean unless you're into that world,
and that's the very different world.I mean maybe out in Hollywood, Yeah,
but if you're out and about withhim anywhere else, people wouldn't make
any assumption. They probably wouldt whohe was. No, No, not
at all. We just end upsitting in Starbucks chatting away. And then
you know, everyone is trying tobe someone in Hollywood and they're just too
busy exactly. So, yeah,they're too busy in their phone, they're

(24:34):
too busy looking to see who theymight know, and they'll pass in by.
They're not going to say, hey, aren't you Aren't you a porn
star? They're not gonna they're notgoing to know that, right, They're
too busy in their own world.So it's the perfect places to hide and
play. In sight is just togo to Starbucks in la and you can
pretty much do what you want.By the sounds of it, you can
be who you want. Yeah,So we talked about this too, because
of course, as you know,I'm in Canada, and if we're talking

(24:56):
about the world, you've been toCanada. You traveled here, but U
you had an interesting experience when youcame here. I think you said you
didn't go into much detail, butI want to hear about it. We're
talking about Niagara Falls, which I'venever been to, by the way,
so don't don't ruin it for me. I made Puny hear about it.
But what happened was really okay,So let's rewind. In twenty nineteen was

(25:19):
possibly the best year of my life. I got to travel so much.
I got to La Chicago, Laagain. I went from a birthday,
I went to Barcelona, I wentto London, all these different places,
and I had this idea that twentytwenty was going to be the same.
But I was going to do onething more. And then when they say,

(25:41):
when you, you know, makeplans, they'll always fall apart,
so COVID hit. But my planwas for personal reasons. The twelfth of
September is an important day for me, and I wanted to go to Snaqualomi
Falls, which is the opening sceneof Twin Peaks. Fall by the hotel
and I wanted to go again.That was my plan for twenty twenty,

(26:06):
and of course that fell apart.I ended up watching an episode of Twin
Peaks on television. Stay at home, don't go more than five kilometers from
home, and sanitize. Yeah,so you know that's what happens. And
I ended up, Yeah, I'min second bride. Yeah, And I
ended up getting to know a bunchof Canadian people on zoom and you know,

(26:30):
because COVID, you know, onlinebecame the new going out, you
couldn't really go anywhere. And Igot to know a bunch of people from
the Oakville Burlington area, which ishere in Canada, in Ontario for those
who don't know, Yeah, alittle further from me, but yeah,
they're just they're just down the downthe province for me, I'm in Ottawa,
so it's just a little bit furtherdown towards Toronto. Yeah, just

(26:52):
right by by Toronto, one anhour away. So I ended up heading
out there last summer or two summersago. I ended up heading out,
going to Burlington, staying in thereb and B with the load of load
of these people and getting to seethese people that I'd spent time with on
Zoom and chatting with online and stuff, and realizing that people actually had legs.

(27:18):
You know, I always saw peoplesitting down as the head maybe a
bit of a chest, pretty muchlike we're doing now. Yeah, yeah,
for sure, I remember that Zoomwas the norm. I mean,
we're still using it now, butnot like it was before. It came
such a lifeline and nobody knew aboutthe room until exactly to me. It's
a COVID product, It's a COVIDprogram. Oh yeah. And so I

(27:44):
head out there in July of lastyear and I spent most of my time
in Oakville and Burlington and getting togetting to see all my favorite people.
Totally enjoyed that. And what Idid was I left one thing undone,
which was not to go to NiagaraFalls, because if I did, maybe
I wouldn't go back again. SoI went back again in December of last

(28:04):
year, and I thoroughly enjoyed itonce again. It was just before I
was you know, I decided toleave the family business after a long time
working there, moving to Holland.They worry about that and the you know,
the fear and everything and the anxietyof all this. I decided to

(28:25):
take a trip out to Canada tosee my friends just before Christmas, before
I moved and and I didn't visitagain. So I was like, okay,
third time, lucky. It's onlyan hour down the road, you
know. And yeah, so Ihead out there the ninth of September this
year. It was a long summerhere in here in Holland. I'm working

(28:47):
in I'm working in a hotel hereand during the service area and it's it
that sounds like ivery busy around thattime of year, especially now that things
have opened up the last couple ofyears. It must be. I know,
hotels, places like that, resourceare going crazy because everyone wants to
travel. They missed out on twothree years right. Oh yeah. Like
I started working here at the endof March and they were like summer is

(29:10):
coming. It was like, youknow, it's like Game of Thrones,
winter is coming. It was athreat as well, but it was summer
is coming, and it was packed. And there's there's a Dutch composer here
violinists called and he's huge. Ididn't even realize how big he is.
He's absolutely massive. He's from Mastrictand the mecca for ander Rao fans.

(29:33):
Is to see him in Mastrict andso the month of July he does all
these concerts. It's insanely busy.But obviously you don't know who he is.
It's because it's he is, actuallyyou do know, I don't know,
you're don't. Yeah, well,let's put it this way. It's
like rave for the hip replacement generation. And they travel from all over the

(29:59):
world to se And it's usually abusy place anyways, MASTERCT because we're on
the Belgian border and the German border, so they all come and visit.
So that was over. The summer'sover to a certain extent, and I
head off to Canada and September fora well needed rest and I picked I
picked the twelfth of September to goto Niagara Falls finally, you know,

(30:22):
the eighth wonder of the world.I forget about some economy falls priorities that
changed, and I got picked uplike two o'clock in the car and it's
an hour down the road. Andfor me it was like, you know,
is it an hour down the road? But you know, really it's
a journey in other ways because ofthe year I had to get there,

(30:45):
and I don't want to put youoff of That's the thing I really don't.
It's far from me. It's farfrom here. It's about an eight
hour drive from me. Niagara Falls. It is worth it. It is
worth it. But so we gotthere. We'll say the goose picked me
up, and we refer to mytour guide as the goose picked me up.

(31:06):
And we drove to We drove toNiagara Faults and tried to get parking
at first, but realized there wasa police station. So we drove around
again and we found a random parkinglot, parked the car and walk down
towards the falls. And you knowthese horror movies where it's an idyllic little
town and things seem just a littlebit off around it. Yeah, crap,

(31:34):
the town around it. It's it'shorrendous. As all I know is
the casino that I see in picturesof the beautiful lights. I've only ever
seen pictures of course around that area, and of course that's that's the beautiful
part of it, right, butthere rest no idea. Oh yeah,
my god, they're not even trying. So we walked down this hill and
there's like like the there's a motelwhich is like mo l because the tea

(31:59):
fell off decades. Absolutely, wewalk down, it's like this really crap
funfair stuff where you know, it'slike a dinosaur head that's rotating, that's
squeaking, but it's not sound effected. It just probably hasn't been oiled since
the tea fell off. It's justlike all these clinically depressed staff sitting in

(32:20):
boots trying to sell tickets for hauntedhouses, and that they're listening to the
Adams Family music on repeat for eighthours a day, which is you know,
wouldn't that's healthy? Yeah, that'shealthy. Yeah, I have to
say it's still better to listening toChad Kroger. But anyways, I'm sensing
the theme. Yeah, I canput up with a few. They got

(32:43):
some if you don't, if yougo out, I'll just say, if
you go outside their radio song stuffyou're probably familiar with, you might find
a few things that are good.Just just an idea. I'll promise you
I'll check that out and I won'tgo to the dark Horse record that there's
a record called the dark Horse intwenty ten. There's a few good ones
on there. I can tell youthat if you don't like at least one
of them. I'll be shocked.Okay, okay, I'm pretty yeah,

(33:06):
exactly end up being played that musicin the fast or in the frozen food
section of Walmart. So I'll checkit out. Absolutely, someone the songs.
There's a few good ones. Yeah. So we head downwards the falls
and we get to him Hartens ofcourse, because you're in Canada, it's
it's blasphemy to go to a Starbucks, even though they exist, and head

(33:30):
down Yeah and you know, crapcoffee. Not a fan of that.
No, So we head down pastall the clinically depressed people and you know,
it was like there was a zombieon the bench, and you know,
I was like, is it?Is it part of the funfairs?
It's just a local because you knowthe whole part of it. Yeah,

(33:51):
could be part of it, couldbe a traction. Yeah yeah, And
you still don't. That's George,he runs, He's the entry to the
park. He's the entry guy.You got to meet George on your way
if you want the full experience,Yeah, wait until you meet Hank.
So we walked down towards the fallsand it is spectacular. You know,
I could use all the superlatives.You know that it is. You know,

(34:13):
people say, go out into natureand what is Niagara Faults? But
it's nature on steroids. It's youcannot, for the first time experience it,
not be in all of it.And I didn't know. There's American
Falls, and then along the wayon the right hand Niagara Falls in New
York State there, and then there'sobviously the one. Most people will go
to the one in Canada. Iknow that because of the view though,

(34:34):
Like I think the Canadian version isbetter than the one in New York State.
I think that's where most Americans willgo from what I've heard. Yeah,
oh yeah, the Canadian falls areamazing. I'd be biased anyways,
but still and walked along there wemet Hank the Seagulls Hank. You know,
everywhere we went at Niagara Falls,Hank was there. I have an

(34:55):
affinity for geese, and I won'tapologize for that. But there's nothing good
about Hank the seagull. He's agrifter. He you know, he lives
off tourists. You know, he'she's just you know, he was just
hanging around the whole time. Youknow, I don't trust him. He
he you know, his wife makessome sandwiches in the morning and he sells

(35:15):
them to tourists. You know,he doesn't. He's lucky to have He's
like a partner in crime. Yeah, and then and then steals them back
because that's what seagulls did. Everywherewent Hank. Hank was supervising. So
we walked along by the falls andit is. It is spectacular. There
was one moment where I looked upand it felt like the water, the

(35:36):
color of the water had changed.It has gone real turquoise. But it
was just the closer we got toit and the boat down on that we
didn't go on the boat, thankgod. There's a boat that goes right
up to the falls and it,you know, walked along by there.
There is a bit where you canlook out over the falls themselves, and
it's just it's very contemplative, youknow, it's very you know, as

(36:00):
I said, like all inspiring andall those other words, but it is.
It is a place you can't bestruck by. And I had to
laugh though. The contrasts of theplace are brilliant. There's a little visitors
center and they have they have atunnel. It's called the Tunnel, but
it's not actually a tunnel. It'sjust an archway and it's a giant picture

(36:22):
of Niagara Faults. And I'm like, and there's people getting their photo taken,
and I'm like, what's the pointof that, Like Karen from Idaho,
just go outside and get your fuckingphoto taken. Yeah, it's safer.
Maybe it's a little safer. Theycan control the environment from within,
that's my guess. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know some people.

(36:42):
Hey, some people are a littleadventurous, not too adventurous. So that
picture is there in place for thatreason. They're they're there to meet all
their server, all masters with that. Yea. So we went along by
that and you know, walk backalong then and decided that the most daring
thing we do is get on thefirst wheel. We weren't going on that
boat. And we went on afirst wheel, and at the top rotation

(37:07):
of the first wheel, the gooserealized that she had left her phone in
the restroom at the tim Hartens.So where it's like the O. J.
Simpson slow speed Chase, the wheelsgoing round and around and around.
We just went to get off thewheel. We just want to get the
phone back or the day is ruined. There was one stage where she waved
at the staff to get off thewheel, and they just waved back.

(37:30):
So we did a couple more rotations, ran back into the tim Hartens and
got the phone back. Thankfully thereis kind of obviously hanged to use the
other restroom. Otherwise it was gone. So we get the phone back,
checked out the falls again later onin the evening time at nighttime and they

(37:52):
light up and everything, and it'sit's, you know, decided. Then
we go for something to eat,and the first option was closed, so
we went to hard Rock Cafe,which is a safe option. It's just
like it's posh McDonald's, you know, it's just you know exactly where what
you're getting where you go. Unfortunatelynot It was probably the worst meal I

(38:17):
ever had in my life. Yeah, and you've had a lot of different
meals in a lot of different countries. In this one, what did you
have? I had? I hada Messy Burger, as in Messy with
the n eye, named after theworld's greatest footballer. Yeah. Yeah,
you can't get wrong with that.He's my hero. It was tasteless,

(38:42):
yet I can still taste it.And I got poutine. I got poutine
because it was in Canada. Butbefore that, the waiter came down and
I knew there was something up.First of all, we got we had
forks and napkins, but no knives, which is probably a safe thing when
you're in that area. Maybe theyprovide them with dinner and supervise you.

(39:02):
But the waiter came down and restedhis chin on the table, his chin
on the table with tell me it'sa high table at a face level,
it's a road table. Yeah,I'm trying to be polite like a Canadian,

(39:22):
but I don't bother. Just letit, let it go, let
it go, let it fly.Yeah, I bety couldn't understand my English,
which is fine, you know,and and and you know hard enough.
Yeah, we we ordered diet cokesand and water and the goose of
the goose of glass was leaking morethan Niagara Falls. It wasn't condensation.

(39:44):
It was just a broken glass.Like the cola was you know that post
mixed stuff, you know, Yeah, it was. It was like a
second cousin of the cola bottle waswaved over dishwater. It was. It
was even the ice was like theoff brands like r C and everything,
the special value brand, value econicbrand. Yeah, the burger came no

(40:06):
toppings, we had to ask forthem, and the poutine was stone cold.
Like I sound like these crazy people, you know, these people on
the Help that just lived to givebad reviews. But the reason I'm saying
it's so bad is because it's it'sa bit like Tommy Whistol's movie The Room.
But it's so bad. It wasbrilliant. Yeah, it was universally

(40:30):
crap, which I'm grateful for becauseif one person had a good meal and
the other didn't, then you know, it would have ruined the whole experience.
But it became comical. I remembergoing off to the restroom just to
get a break from the food morethan anthonose. And when I came back
the way there was like was everythingokay? It was like nothing was okay?

(40:51):
But you know, I paid thebill, got out of there before
they threatened us with free dessert.Yeah exactly. Did he question why it
wasn't good? Most people was say, oh, what can we do or
what happened? Or what didn't youenjoy? To even question it? Or
he's just like oh okay, sorry, sorry a and then he you know,
I wasn't going to complain either.It's not very nice. That's not
very Canadian. Yeah, yeah,my life, My nothing was okay.

(41:15):
It was just surrender. Let meout here? Do we do we explain
why his chin was on the table? Interest he was definitely knitting with one
needle. He wasn't right up there, you know he was was his shoe
or just want to get a lookat your shoes or just verifying can imagine

(41:36):
that I've never seen that. No, definitely non shoe tying. It was
it. Yeah, we decided toget out of there, which which wasn't
that easy. After all. Wewe ended up heading back towards the car
and there's there's this natural phenomenon thatoccurs as every day it's called nighttime,

(41:59):
and that live in Scandinavia. Sowe couldn't find the car. It was
dark, and you know, thebonus tour was that if the front streets
and Niagara Falls are not that nice, you don't want to check out the
back streets. So we're wandering aroundbackstreets and Niagara Falls looking for the car,

(42:21):
considering going up on this like towerthing where you can press the button
then on the car and maybe thelights will come on, you know.
But we did realize that it wasa crap parking lot, so we did
follow the degeneration of parking lots,and then we realized there was the Starbucks

(42:44):
and the Tim Hortons nearby. Soafter I don't know, like an hour
of wandering, we finally found ourway back to the car, which was
which was such a relief heading backto Oakville. And there was that eerie
moment when we were like two kilometerssome more Quille where I was afraid sign
a come up saying welcome to NiagaraFalls, that I was going to be

(43:05):
caught in this constant loop of eatingcold poutine. Yeah, that's that's the
whole reason why you would come,and that's one of the things that claim
to fame and just to have thethe tasteless experience of that is just depressing
and beyond belief. Well no,but it was a fantastic day because one

(43:28):
of the things I watched before wasIdiot Abroad where Carol Pilkington went to see
the pyramids and an eighty year oldwoman collapsed in front of the pyramids and
he said, you know this,you know these these pyramids are centuries Oh,
this woman is eighty everyone staring ather, so you do remember the
quirky things that went wrong? SoI have have to say what was a

(43:52):
great day? I would recommend yougo, remember who you park the car,
keep your phone on you, andbring a packed lunch. Good advice
for anybody listening. Are back herewith a fresh pot of coffee for you
and a few more stories from youas well too. You're gonna You're gonna
show it off there. There isthat an importance mug. Where'd you get?

(44:14):
Where is that from? E Bay? Oh? Yeah, no,
one of my friends said it tome. I'm glad I made the trip
all the way to the post.Oh, and then I brought it to
Hollands along with my Lindsay Lohan mugshotmug that was They were essentials, along
with the passport. Yeah, youmentioned that too, I think in when

(44:36):
we were chatting back and forth inthe email something about Lindsay Lohan. You're
you didn't meet her, did you? But you something about the movie or
you have that mugshot mug? What'sthe story there? Oh? It kind
of started as a meme with myfriends in New York where we all hung
out and one of the guys hedoes. He does artwork of Lindsay open

(45:01):
and he's now managed to put themon T shirts and everything. But I
have this thing about her. Ithink she's just amazing. I think she's
absolutely brilliant. And it started offas a joke where I you know,
you ever see these posts on Facebook, like name five movies you've watched five
times, and I'd be like,well, I've watched Me and Girls twenty
five times. I've only actually watchedit twice, and I've been making mean

(45:24):
girls jokes before I even watched themovie, So it just be kind of
came to mean with me, andI ended up once on French television wearing
a Lindsay Lohan T shirt. Itwas the mock shot free Lindsay T shirt.
Might get to that one the moment, but I actually forget where we

(45:45):
were exactly. Well, you hadfit me when we left off. We
had finished your awful trip to thehard Rock Cafe in Canada, and you
were back in safe in Oakville andthen pretty soon out of Canada, which
kind of leads me to a question. I want to ask you that experience
notwithstanding though, but you've been somany places different countries, different cities.

(46:06):
Is there maybe like a country ora city that you went to You're like,
ah, I wouldn't really even visitthat anymore. I wouldn't visit that
place anymore. I mean, besidesNagara Falls, is there one that kind
of like ah, I could neverdo that again and be happy? Yeah?
Maybe Paris to a certain extent.No, I want to go back
to I want to go back toParis again. I went to November and

(46:30):
it was arguably the best day ofmy life. Bosh, it is It
was so cold, it is soexpensive. It is just French people are
you know, French people are they'rethey're human cats. They just don't care.
Yeah, I do love cats,you know, but they you know,
but you know, in human form. No, that's just weird.

(46:52):
I don't care if they're listening tothis. I don't care if they stop
listening to this. They know whothey are, they know what they are.
Yeah, I'm trying to actually thinkif we're in that I really didn't
like. I don't know. Ithink every place has its own charm and
it is an experience in its ownway. Where have you not gone that
you want to go to? Japan? Okay, Oh definitely, Yeah,

(47:13):
I definitely want to go to Japan. You think New York is busy,
you think New York is packed NewYork City, Yeah, oh yeah,
I think Japan is just absolutely nuts. But yeah, I have I have
an interest in Japanese, Japanese books, and the whole culture is fascinating.
They do things totally different, yetit makes a lot of sense. Absolutely,

(47:34):
do you speak any language or orno? No, I do have
a gentleman prefer blonde's tattoo in Japaneseon my arm so that they'll be okay
with that, they'll welcome you inopen arms. There. Yeah, we've
had a few tourists come to thehotel where one of them looked at my
tattoo and started busting his ass laughing, and then just showed it to his

(47:58):
girlfriend. And he thought I gotit done when I was drunk, and
I was like, no, Igot this done when I was sober.
This is this is intentional. AndI asked him to translate it into into
English and he said it meant boyslike girls with white hair. But it
actually tells me gentleman blondes. Okay, was she blonde? Was she blonde?

(48:20):
At least his girl. It wasjust like, oh, his girlfriend,
that's too bad. It's too bad. If I were him, I
would have made something up and saidsomething was something else. The sun always
shine, the sun always shines onTV, or something nicer than something like
that, something superficial, you know. But yeah, the Lindsay Lohan then

(48:42):
started as a meme and yeah,I got out of hand, but I
make no apologies for that. Younever met her in person. I filmed
about an hour from my town inIreland two years ago and it was like
everyone was just sending me these messagesgoing, you have to get Derek to
this town, you have to getinto this time. Yeah, well she's

(49:07):
come back. Obviously is a bigfan of hers, you would know she's
you know, she took a turnthere in the mid two thousands. I
think after Mean Girls around that timeshe kind of went downhill. But then
she's really got herself back on track. There's a couple of Hallmark Channel movies
that came out in the last coupleof years that were that were okay with
her, and then some other stuffhas come out where she's you know,
kind of turned the corner. Idon't know how old she has now.

(49:29):
I think she's mid forties or something, but she's from what I can tell,
she's getting back into acting and doinga doing another run of it.
Mean Girls is a great movie,Yeah it is. I like that,
although Rachel McAdams for me was thehighlight of that honestly, but but I
still liked They're all pretty good.It was a good It was a fun
movie too, and I was one, Uh yeah, I like to I'll

(49:51):
leave it at that. Yeah.Yeah, there's a new one coming out
though, too. I think MeanGirls too, there is, indeed,
I don't know. I don't knowif any of the old of the old
ones won't make an appearance, butI won't probab maybe there'll be the moms
this time. Who knows. That'llbe fun. That's probably what's going to
happen, I guess. And likeTwin Peaks, any version of Mean Girls
would be great. Absolutely, theone and the one and the same for

(50:14):
sure. Yeah. You you're notan author, but you had yourself,
I guess as a fictional character writtenin a book by John Connolly, the
author. Yes, yeah, yeah, I'm a huge bookworm. I'm a
huge bookworm. And one of thethings was you know when when I say
as a bookworm, it's it's seenreally as a solitary experience reading a book.

(50:37):
But then you know, I gotto New York, I got to
Los Angeles and Chicago through flight Clubthe book more so than the movie,
and and the author and I endedup years ago meeting Chuck paulinik in Munich.
So I got to know John Connleyabout I don't know, it's like

(50:59):
fifteen years ago. I was Iwas a fan. He was doing an
event in the city nearby and Iand I went to see him, and
he came across such a nice,humble, really cool, quirky, funny
guy. And I had to sayexpectation, because his books are quite dark,
that he'd be a very grab character, very anti social, But he's
completely the opposite of what you thinkan author like him would be like.

(51:23):
And he's a really cool guy.And I ended up hanging out with them
and got to know him over theyears, and we became friends. And
a few years ago he named thecharacter after me in his book and then
shut me out, shot me.Well, I mean, he wanted to
make you, you know, hewanted to make you memorable. So that's
one way to do it. Iwould assume at least hopefully had a good

(51:43):
role before you were shot off.I had a part in the story.
I did had I had a fairlymajor part in the in the book,
and I think my favorite line wasHeinzen's sense of humor is an acquired taste
if you're unlucky enough to acquire,which I love it. Did you use
your real name as a character inthe book? Your full name is Derek

(52:05):
Hines, detective sergeant. You allowedhim to use it. That's good,
That's very very good. That's awesome. You've had a lot of You have
a lot of experiences that a lotof people would you know, well,
they kill for they dream about isjust it's it's funny because a lot of
people in this day and age,thyugh do meet and greets with artists,
with bands, with celebrities, whatever, they'll pay for an experience, which

(52:28):
are not great experiences for I cantell. But you've had a lot of
run ins like natural like oh,conversations, just things happen naturally, which
is what people dream of happening butnever really does for the majority of the
public. So what do you thinkthat is about you or about where you
find yourself that you just happen torun into these people and start real natural
conversations like how do you not wantto stay lucky? But how do you

(52:49):
think it is that you're just ableto get these experiences that other people just
you know, wish for. Idon't know. I mean, I I
just finished work there with the colleaguethat gears said, really that I'd started
a conversation in an empty house.I don't know what it is. I
think it was. It started off, you know that where I started going

(53:12):
to author events and the first oneI went with John Conley and and a
lot of them, they just getup on stage, they read a bit
of their book, they signed theirbook afterwards, and then that's it,
you know. But there's there's nocontact, no handshake, and that's that's
not in these day and ages likehere's my saying sure, which is very
much photocopied, and thanks for buyingthe book, thanks for coming out,

(53:34):
Take care next, next, next, And people get people get so pissed
off about that. But what dothey expect? Yeah, you know,
and then some of them, likeyou going to see Chuck Paul Nick is
an experience, you know, goingto see John Ronson. I went to
see him in Dublin a few yearsago, and it's it's it's you know,
he's a non fiction writer. He'sextremely quirky, He's Welsh and he's

(53:57):
got a squeaky voice and his highyou know, he's just bouncing around the
stage, switching from one subject toanother. It's it's, it's like a
comedy show. It's it's an hourand a half of absolute you know,
you're captivated by how crazy this guyis. And so a lot of the
author events. And that's one ofthe things is when I said that,

(54:17):
you know, books can be solitary, and unfortunately there is a snobbishness as
well in the in the literary scene, which I find very off putting in
a way that you know, Ican write a book for one person and
if they enjoy it, or ifI write it as a hobby, isn't
it just as good as somebody thatis, you know, grafting away,

(54:40):
you know, to put through apoetry collection just to sip wine and eat
cheese and other poets, Yeah,exactly. You do it for you know,
you get your artistic creativity out thereand then if someone connects with it,
great. If they don't, wellthey maybe they will at some point
they it's it's the reason behind whyyou do it. That's what it comes
down to. You do you wantbe rich and famous and recognize at the

(55:01):
grocery store, at the gas station, or do you want to get your
creativity out? It comes down tothat. So yeah, and I got,
you know, I got to meetI got. I did go to
meet Chuck Paulnick in Munich, andthat was that was an experience. That
was you already in in Germany andMunich or did you just happen to go
there for that? I happened togo there for that. It was I

(55:22):
don't know. It was about tenyears ago, and it was a friend
of mine that when he was visitingMunich. She she got an interview with
him, and I said, I'dfly out. But unfortunately, about a
week before that, my mother hadan accident and she was in hospital at
the time, and you know,I she she had said, you know,

(55:45):
you got to go. You've beentalking about this for so long.
And I went out to Munich.And at the time I had a cat
called Kujo, named after the StephenKing character the dog, and I was
on a mission to get a photoof Kujo to to Stephen King, which

(56:06):
was which was a dream. SoI started giving it just but I randomly
went to these book events and Ialways bring a gift, so I'd always
bring candy, a book, andalso a photo of my cat, Kujo,
which which ended up endearing my catmore so to people than me.
I remember. I remember going tosee Patrick de Wish for the second time

(56:29):
and he pointed out to his friendthis guy, I can't remember his name,
but he's got a cat called Kujo. Yeah, that's my hook.
So I went to see Chuck.We got to hang out with him for
an hour and a half and andafter the event as well, and we
ended up chatting with them, andI gave him the book and the candy

(56:51):
and the photo of my cat,and he ended up asking me for my
address and he signed to get worldcard for my mother and a Christmas Yeah,
I got a I got a Christmastree ornament for my mother saying dear
Derek's mom, hope you're feeling betternow, a Christmas card for Kujo,
and a copy of his new bookso for you. Yeah, Yeah,

(57:15):
that's good, that's amazing. That'sgreat story. Here. That's that's that's
wonderful. Yeah, that made yourmom. Your mom must have been very
happy to receive that surprise, butvery happy. Yeah, you know,
and she made a full recovery,so that was a good thing. That's
good to hear. That's good tohear. That's really good to hear.
And the last and the bit oftime I have with you here, I
know it's late for you. Iappreciate you taking a time for me and
getting this scheduled through and making thishappen. What's what's uh? What's it

(57:39):
looking like for the future for you? You do travel a lot. Now,
you're in Amsterdam for a little while. You've been there ever since.
I guess twenty twenty. You hadto move back for family family reasons,
as you mentioned. Do you seeyourself staying put making roots where you are
now? Do you see yourself continueto travel? I know you want to
go to Japan, but do youthink you'd live in Japan? Move or
is Amsterdam or your main place?No? Definitely not going to live in

(58:04):
Japan. That's a that's a placeI'd love to visit, love to visit.
Yeah, Well I am in Holland, but I'm not actually in Amsterdam
itself. So yeah, I'm inHolland. Sorry, kept I know why
I said Amstrong. We talked aboutthat's why. Yeah, I got you.
Yeah, I can't pronounce the nameof the You said the name of
the town, and I can't pronouncethat. You can say it again,
but Matt Master, is it right? Okay, there you go. And

(58:30):
then the locals call it my streak. But Magic Street, Yeah, yeah,
that's a closest I'll get to it. You live on Magic Street.
You're in Magic Street. That soundsfantastic. Does do you plan? Do
you plan to stay there? Iknow, like I said, you want
to do some more traveling. Butdo you think you'll end up living there
primarily or do you think you'll goback to Ireland? What do you think

(58:51):
is your plan in the next fiveyears or so? Oh? I don't
know. I mean, I meanreally, I probably won't go back to
Ireland in the near future. I'mmoved here, you know, in a
way, it was kind of likea redemption. You know. I lived
here twenty years ago and then ittook me years to come back, and
then I realized that I wanted tolive here again. So I decided that

(59:14):
in January this year I moved.I moved out here and there was the
initial struggles as well. Moving anywherein January is bleak. January is just
a bleak month. The job frontwas very quiet and a lot of doubts
and everything, and my living situationwasn't the best at the time. I

(59:36):
ended up moving out in the summerof one place, staying with a friend
for two months, and the daybefore I went out to Canada and holiday,
I got the keys from my newplace, which is a quite difficult
thing to do here. There's ahousing shortage everywhere. So I'm here to
I'm here to live. You don'tknow what life will throw at you.

(59:59):
I think it's Sunday. I willlive in Canada there. Oh yeahs Nigara
falls top of the list. Yeah, just make it, make a change.
You could be the change. Youcould be the reason it picks itself
back up from the desolate floor.Yeah, that's most likely end up in
the barrels at the top as anattraction. At the very least, that'd

(01:00:23):
be amazing. East or West Coastfor you. Have you been to West
Coast of Canada. It's very niceout there. A little less cold,
a little less snow. Yeah,I heard it side Vancouver and everything is
beautiful, but I would love tolive in the area. Have already been
to. Yeah, a lot ofgood people out in Oakville and Burlington.
So my heart on that. That'ssome sta at some stage. Yeah,

(01:00:46):
it's good to hear. If youever decide to write a book on your
life, if that's ever a possibility, I love to uh to see that
and talk to you about that.Do you ever think about right you've had,
like I said, because obviously withthis podcast you've done a few,
you have story, you have experiences. I'm sure there's more we could talk
about too, But have you everthought about putting pen to paper about you?

(01:01:07):
One of the things that I've discussedwith Tyler and a few other friends,
and that is that, you know, perhaps to remove the kind of
snobbishness as well, as I said, from literature and everything, and that
to show that to read can bean experience, it brings you outside of
the books itself, and maybe,you know, maybe create something like the

(01:01:28):
stories I have with authors in thatand maybe even get them, you know,
tell my side of the story andthen maybe get you know, say
the experiences are here, and maybesome of them will donate a piece of
original writing and put it together,you know, something a little different than
a standard biography. That'd be somethingI'd love to do at some stage.

(01:01:53):
And then again, I'm like,why bother? I can just go down
to the shop and buy one fortwenty euros but no. Yeah, Or
you could get a ghost writer andhave them write to Derek Hines story as
well too. If you really wantto go that route, you can just
do a dictation and let them addsome creative liberties, a little Hollywood magic
to it, and it could bea fantastic film. You never know story,

(01:02:14):
a true story, nigger falls,never go back something. Yeah,
there you go. Hey, youalready got the title. You already got
the title. That's perfect, Derek. I appreciate your time. I'm glad
you connected with me and reached out. I can't wait for people to have
a listen and check this out andhear about it again. And like I
said, I'm sure we only scratchthe service. There's more stuff we can

(01:02:36):
talk about, so hopefully we cando it again sometime. But I appreciate
the moments that we have here.Chad You're an absolute star. I love
every minutes Hire too kind man awesome. You've been listening to the Nobody's or
Somebody's podcast with me Chadvice, andthis podcast has been voted the number one
podcast by people that don't vote