Flamin’ Hot Lies, Fat Guy Struggles & You’re Doing It Wrong!! - Nonsense Podcast S4E80 - NonSense

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The flaming hot cheeto was invented by a drop out
of high school and was the janitor at Lace who
eventually became their executive.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
In the company. That's a good fact.

Speaker 3 (00:17):
A lot of people still don't know that, even though
they made like two documentaries in a movie. But a
little bit of blast me behind this man's name. Can
we not flame a hot anything to fuck else?

Speaker 2 (00:28):
Please?

Speaker 3 (00:28):
Like, no more, no moss, specifically to him, no moss.
We are flaming hot everything, Cheetos, the taco shells, us ruffle,
everything got flame hot on it now, popcorn, peanuts, they
got flameing hot peanuts.

Speaker 2 (00:45):
Popcorn brother brother Brother, flaming hot fried mac and cheese.

Speaker 3 (00:53):
Yes, they have flameing hot mac and cheese in general.

Speaker 2 (00:57):
Yeah, they got flaming hot wings too.

Speaker 3 (01:00):
I'm surprised we got flaming hot condoms at this point,
Like goddamn, Like we don't need everything to be spicy.
Everything don't need to be spicy.

Speaker 2 (01:08):
Burn inside, and.

Speaker 3 (01:13):
You don't know if you've got ganahea or not because
you got to flame a hot.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
Like just everything is wrong, Like roll it back a
little bit said he was gonna make his girls suck.
How suck? The rito dust off, but he did not
say if it was spicy.

Speaker 3 (01:33):
Not you, if it was just regular to rito dust
that's wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:39):
Oh that's that's.

Speaker 3 (01:43):
Like you could have picked a better flavor. Cool ranch
I would rather you do than regular. Not sweet chili
chili might taste better, oh dick, But I don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:57):
As a hetero man, I'm pretty sure dick don't taste good.
I have never across my mind. It tastes like skins.

Speaker 3 (02:05):
I don't I know what what the reverse don't taste
like nickels, So I'm assuming.

Speaker 2 (02:14):
You're not a vampire. No, it's a nickel nickel baste
to that.

Speaker 3 (02:19):
So it tastes like the back tip of the batteries,
you know what I mean, licked the battery.

Speaker 2 (02:26):
That's what it tastes like. Cap the diet effects, I'm
just saying.

Speaker 3 (02:36):
Not everybody's got good diet, So I'm just saying like
they got juice to put on everything, and if you
if you got to see everything fishing season, and.

Speaker 2 (03:00):
If your day was supposed to be the season, you
gotta put condiments on the coach.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
I'm just saying, like it ain't nothing wrong with a
little bit of seasoned niggas lost season, and I'm just saying, like,
what's is that a problem?

Speaker 2 (03:13):
Would you be offended he put some lowries on your ship.
That's got all right. I would stick with O bad
fucking celery. Stop it.

Speaker 3 (03:29):
I'm just saying that that's not bad. Hit that with
a line. Nigga chef's kiss is what I'm talking about.

Speaker 2 (03:36):
Niggas trying to eat sevichi? Which one is going on there?

Speaker 1 (03:43):
So a little more about this, dude, Oh yeah, I
can get on to something else, please.

Speaker 2 (03:50):
I thought he was done with Louise.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
So he was a feel like he failed at motivational
speaking and writing, like being an author. So Janetor was
his next move. So you know, don't give up on
his ship.

Speaker 2 (04:09):
He still to get in the kitchen, igga. He chose
to get in the kitchen. It's different where he belonged.
Clearly he is.

Speaker 1 (04:19):
Net worth is fifteen million, so that's it.

Speaker 2 (04:23):
He got rocked twice. I'm surprised as that.

Speaker 3 (04:26):
I I'm just saying I thought it would be higher,
That's all loll.

Speaker 2 (04:31):
They jerked him multiple times for that recipe. He got
more money than the famous as.

Speaker 3 (04:39):
Yeah, speaking of the famous A did you know that
Sweet Avery Ray was white.

Speaker 2 (04:43):
I found that out recently, too, blew me.

Speaker 3 (04:47):
I don't know why that blew so many people. I
knew that apparent, Yes, I was the only person that
I knew that at the time.

Speaker 2 (04:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:52):
No, I love the that people were finding that out.

Speaker 2 (04:55):
Yeah, man, that that white nigga is a Chicago legend.
M hm.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
Suburbs first there in Chicago from Elk Grove Park. I mean, oh, well, yeah,
and so we gotta keep suburban people in their place
from the suburbs.

Speaker 2 (05:12):
He did.

Speaker 3 (05:13):
He entered the contest in Chicago, and it would have
taken me. If I was outside of the city, it
was still would have taken him.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
Kurt must must have participated in different years.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
Kurt stupid, which wait, what's is his sauce? Captain kurtz
Oh with the k Kurt No, I mean his ain't bad.
Don't get me wrong, it ain't bad, but it ain't
touch a sweet Baby Ray. Can we be honest on that?
Sweet Baby Ray is top of the barbecue.

Speaker 2 (05:43):
My mom disagrees, and and like plus Kurts is it's
a lot Kurts is a lot more vinegar sauce. It's
more of a sauce because sweet baby rays come out thick.

Speaker 3 (05:57):
Yeah, if I'm gonna get some some nigga, I want
to play with it.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
Like if I had to choose between sauce. If I like,
if I was going out and I and I have
sauce at home, well, I typically have sweatber rays at home,
but if I like out, I would use curts. If
I was like at home cooking ReBs myself, I would

(06:21):
use sweetber rays. You gotta get sweetbery rays on motherfucking
paintbrush niggas.

Speaker 3 (06:27):
I don't think I've used kurt since I grew up
and learned to have taste that sounded more like and
so kurt is good for mixing into stuff. I will
say that now because when I make baked beans, it's
sweet baby rais good.

Speaker 2 (06:46):
Mind sauce sweetbert.

Speaker 3 (06:48):
Yes, when I need to make my own homemade mind sauce,
I go Kurt.

Speaker 2 (06:52):
Yes. If I'm more of a mild sauce mood, I'm
choosing curts, but barbecue goes to sweet baby. Now, who's
that that? Laborers, the Japanese, the bachi, the Japanese niggas
coming up? You don't see baby ass.

Speaker 3 (07:06):
Korean's been trying to come up on everything black related.
I keep telling people Kreans ain't got no culture. Ya
ain't got no culture, y'all. Biers all, y'all is some biers.
It took fried chicken, y'all improved it. I give you that.
You're taking barbecue sauce. You're proving on it. I can't
wait to krees get They don't flame hot Korean basedlaming hot, Mike.

Speaker 2 (07:26):
No, they They came out with Korean wing ruffles recently.
I didn't grab a bag because I thought it was
gonna be stupid. Put nothing. But if I see another bag,
I'll break it for the show.

Speaker 3 (07:43):
Yeah, no, for sure, we can't have nothing. There was
that all of the.

Speaker 2 (07:48):
We ain't got no fried chicken ruffles. They beat us
to it.

Speaker 3 (07:51):
You would think niggas would have been on top of that,
but we were too busy deep front watermelon like some heathens.

Speaker 2 (07:56):
I hate us sometimes. Yeah, I don't like regular watermelon.

Speaker 3 (08:05):
You wouldn't be the one only person on this planet
that would dislike watermelon.

Speaker 2 (08:09):
I do not participate in all of my color stereotypes.
I don't typically use hot sauce either. No, why because
I'm a bitch, with spice. You've seen me on this show.

Speaker 3 (08:23):
I'm just saying they have not hot hot sauce.

Speaker 2 (08:26):
You can get other shit. I like it, like like
the little cups. I'm a dipper.

Speaker 3 (08:37):
Know what I'm saying is you know what I'm saying
is get like a different style of hot sauce like
you just got, like the vinegar based like you know louisianaity.

Speaker 2 (08:46):
Yeah, like if I must.

Speaker 3 (08:52):
I feel like that's more on the tangier side. I
prefer like a fresh, like almost salta style hot sauce.

Speaker 2 (08:57):
Sometimes Mexican really fuck with chi Lula is really good.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
That actually is probably been the only thing I'd put
on an egg if it was going to be a sauce.
You ketch up sauce on eggs when I first pissed
me off. I hate that ship, all right. I don't
do it.

Speaker 2 (09:19):
But I can see it because eggs are takenically in
the chicken family. I feel like anybody that puts ketchup
on a steak should burn it. Hell of course, absolutely,
Like I don't know what happened to you or who
hurts you, but stop hurting everybody else? Is your bad decisions? Right?

Speaker 3 (09:38):
Ready? Welcome back to the Nonsense Podcast. I wish welcome

(10:28):
back to the Nonsense Podcast. I having to be F
and Bob, the F and host fn CEO of F
and Entertainment, the fucking everything that has to do with
the show over there, my boy Handy Invincible, the F
and bias babyface and my F and co host.

Speaker 2 (10:43):
I don't know why you went Randy over there, our
F and button pusher and our strong and silent HR.

Speaker 3 (10:52):
I'm scared of him. I don't think the show ever
needed HR. And now that we got one that just
sits and watch them, well, you demoted me. I was, yeah,
and just you sucked up the job. Maybe that should
have been crazy. I should have kept you there because
you were bad at it. He didn't interfere with the
ones on the show. But now you are a better.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
ELVI since you ever since you devoted means since it
takes have.

Speaker 3 (11:13):
Been exactly So maybe you were good at it. But
but yeah, so now you're a better co host now
because you're not worried about the JAR. It's actually quite well.
I like I like that change in you. You needed
that you needed to be unburdened by responsibility and speaking
of being unburdened. How's everybody doing at home on a Wednesday?

(11:34):
It's hump day? How y'all doing?

Speaker 2 (11:36):
I hope it's Wednesday night? You know what that means?
All lead wrestling? That's not mad?

Speaker 3 (11:47):
Well, hopefully everybody's having a good week so far. How
y'all doing? I mean, I don't think I asked last episode.
How y'all doing?

Speaker 2 (11:54):
I'm could I could use a couple more hours of sleep,
but what what that is different than any other day?

Speaker 3 (12:02):
Sip your dead sleeps for the week. Kelly, how you doing?

Speaker 2 (12:07):
I'm alive. It's a thing. Lot of shirt.

Speaker 3 (12:09):
Should No one cares about you? Chad, how y'all doing
at home? How y'all doing at home? I hope y'all good.
I hope everything's great in your life. You're enjoying your
pride for some odd reason, even though pride be the
fall of us.

Speaker 2 (12:22):
All pride is the devil is what Jay Cole said. Yeah,
but I mean.

Speaker 3 (12:27):
If y'alls what y'all want to do, that's what y'all
want to do. I have told myself that in my
later years, I will never be a goalie. I'm trying
to be a point guard. I'm not gonna block your shots,
but I'll assist you and having having fun with yours.
I'm not gonna participate though. You know what I'm saying,
the participate on your own time. Busy week for everybody.

(12:49):
I know you seem to be not stressed, but maybe
stressed and blessed.

Speaker 2 (12:54):
How about that tomorrow? Yeah it wasn't. Oh damn, I
be in the streets tomorrow over anything fun? But no,
I've been good. I mean, I don't know. It's too

(13:16):
it's too close to pay day for me to be
pissed off. So I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (13:21):
My payday is all ways away, so I won't know
what the paycheck looked like. But I know this was
gonna be a good one because I got o t
to put on that one. Damn man, I've been working
my ainus off. How you been Kelly the dog training world?

Speaker 2 (13:38):
Yeah, it's been. It's been a thing. Do you want
to show them.

Speaker 3 (13:42):
The Yeah, I forgot. I was just thinking about that.
I'm like, we should probably bust each other head have
a plate a box because she works hard. Damn do
this this flip?

Speaker 2 (13:59):
Or what the hell? His box? What the helly does
it just slip off?

Speaker 3 (14:06):
Why is it so tight.

Speaker 2 (14:09):
Never complaining about that before, not.

Speaker 3 (14:12):
When it keeps me from getting to the good ship
on the inside. Here you go, goddamn. And then there's
more contraptions. Here you go, brought these back, a blast
from the past. R Kade nine cook You can eat it.
You could just eat it. You could just eat it.

(14:33):
I knew it was gonna happen. It's hilarious every time
it happens.

Speaker 4 (14:38):
There you go, damn yeah, all in your face, sweet sugar.

Speaker 3 (14:52):
Goddamn. These are crumbly cookies. These tastes good in their cookies, the.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
Sugar cookies from Alliance Bakery. And I had an event Saturday,
an event Saturday that turned out really good. Actually, yeah
and yeah, we got these.

Speaker 3 (15:17):
Shout out to Alliance Cookies. I'll put a little I'll
put your website or something up.

Speaker 2 (15:22):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (15:23):
Don't let me forget shout them out. I like cookies.
Make us a nonsense one. I want a nonsense cookie.
Shit my little triangle on that more. Maybe Chad bear
on it. Chad, you want to be on the cookie. Yeah,
I can't even eat cookies. You eat honey? Do they
got honey cookies? Do they have anything other.

Speaker 2 (15:43):
Than sugar cookies, actually honey bums.

Speaker 3 (15:49):
I'm more of a nutty Buddy Burst than myself. But
I'm just saying I don't like honey buns that much.
Super donuts eat? What's the number one Little Debbie that?
Did you want a cookie?

Speaker 2 (16:04):
By the way, I mean it's not a little Debby,
but I'm if I see a super donut, I'm grabbing
a super donut.

Speaker 3 (16:11):
You you don't tuck with Little Debbie at all or
just not often.

Speaker 2 (16:17):
I'm cool with Deborah. I'm cool with Deborah. I'm I'd
be so confused as to what's her.

Speaker 3 (16:24):
Brand and what ain't the ship with her face on it?

Speaker 2 (16:28):
I know, but like Liken whales out of Ben Wheals,
with Deborah, no.

Speaker 3 (16:39):
I'm hostless. And then there's a Little Debbie maybe, but
I don't think so, and that's all hostless.

Speaker 2 (16:49):
Yeah. If I'm at a gas station, I'm either getting
the honey buns, a Grandma's cookie, or a super donut. Yeah,
I still get the grandma No, I like joints, the
double fudge double fudges.

Speaker 3 (17:05):
Little Debbie. Oh no, well, the Grandma's. She has a
double fudge, but the stuffed one is a little Debbie.

Speaker 2 (17:15):
Where are you at?

Speaker 3 (17:17):
A little Debbie ship, Swiss roads, nutty bodies, Christmas oatmeal piles,
cosmic brownies piles, Now those are those are the fucking
best when they when I need an oatmeal pile to
look like a fat bitch's ass, huh with the ripples

(17:39):
and wrinkles, man, with the ripples and wrinkles. Yeah, I
said it. If it don't look like you gotta sell
your light on it, I don't want it. I don't
want the smooth ass cookie that ship out of here.
What just being honest, man, But nuttybody beats everything.

Speaker 2 (18:08):
That's what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (18:10):
Nuttybody, then the oatmeal, then that peanut butter cookies it
after that, and bring back the brownie with the nuts
on it. Yeah, Like I feel like I'm in the
only I'm in the loop of like people that are
like only remember that one. Get that sprinkle bullshit out
of here.

Speaker 2 (18:27):
Yeah, give them bring the nuts back.

Speaker 3 (18:32):
Then we had that conversation on the podcast, but that
was just a personal conversation about Snickers that they only
taste good with Dick veanes.

Speaker 2 (18:40):
That was like online discourse for like two months.

Speaker 3 (18:43):
No, because I know we had that conversation at worked
because we brought in a bunch of Snickers, and I
brought in variations with and without Dick veans, and we
all agreed, you need the dick veins.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
Because without the veins just looks like a butterfinger. Yeah,
although I do like butterfingers too, I don't know, excuse me,
love peanut, butter, love chocolate. Oh no, it feels like
I need a dentist on hand every time I even
think about you one. That's crazy.

Speaker 3 (19:17):
I love, I love a butterfinger, alma solid. I don't
get them as often as I would like to because
they just don't ever like butterfinger, don't be readily available.

Speaker 2 (19:24):
I'm never eating a butter finger and didn't have to
work hard after the Does that mean to get the
shot out my teeth? How often do you order the dentists?
What the fuck? Regularly? But that ship I don't know,
fucking stuck they get stuck enough.

Speaker 3 (19:41):
I have not had that issue ever.

Speaker 2 (19:43):
Man, I chew them misiness too hard.

Speaker 3 (19:45):
That's saying like, how you consuming the motherfuckers?

Speaker 2 (19:47):
Nigu miss with your teeth.

Speaker 3 (19:50):
Like ship man bit the griddle.

Speaker 2 (19:52):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (19:52):
Yeah, you're supposed to. That's why they shouldn't get stuck
if you chew them properly. They shouldn't be having hunks
or nothing like that.

Speaker 2 (19:59):
I got stupid teeth, but that damn it, that sh
be murder to me. That's what I just don't that's crazy. Yeah,
I didn't know that.

Speaker 3 (20:06):
That's I'm not saying it's a personal issue, but I'm
saying is a personal issue.

Speaker 2 (20:10):
It might be more.

Speaker 3 (20:11):
I've not had that issue. I think the only one
I might have more of an issue with, and that's
still not even a problem, is the Milky Way, because
it's just they what now, it's thick caramel. It's just
stick as fuck. You might be mixing it with the
Three Musketeer. Oh yeah, that's that's just the chocolate fluff

(20:32):
whatever they call it.

Speaker 2 (20:33):
I feel like sometimes I feel like me and my
girl are the only ones that keep Payday in business.
I like pay that. I like that.

Speaker 3 (20:43):
It's not it might be my top five candy, but
not very high. It's solid.

Speaker 2 (20:53):
It does what it's it's the only one without chocolate.

Speaker 3 (20:55):
They have a chocolate one, and the chocolate will be
on point. The chocolate one to be on point.

Speaker 2 (21:00):
I think it's way. Ain't that just the fucking Babe Ruth.

Speaker 3 (21:05):
No chocolate on the outside, And I think, hey, they
did chocolate on the inside.

Speaker 2 (21:10):
Oh do that that was a fucking Babe Ruth. I
fuck with Baby Ruth shout out to Babe Ruth and
having gum and a candy bar. I know that.

Speaker 3 (21:22):
I did not know that what Baby Ruth had gone,
I think, so, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (21:29):
At the very least he got to cut it out
out of that big lead shoo deal mself.

Speaker 3 (21:35):
Possibly, I think, yeah, because I had I had the
big lead chew from my first no ship.

Speaker 2 (21:48):
If I been subsiduent, big lead too, oh actual just
chewing gum. Not No, it's baby Ruth's Baby Ruth.

Speaker 3 (22:00):
No shit, I've never seen that before in my fucking life,
all right. I thought it was Babe Ruth dumb, not
Baby Ruth. That's different. Did not know that.

Speaker 2 (22:15):
But he did get a cut out of the big
league too, Yeah, man, yeah, mad Covers.

Speaker 3 (22:20):
I believe it. I mean, he was arguably the goat
of baseball, so, I mean he played before Negroes. But
that's a whole different story. That's not his fault. I heard,
by the way, that forty two was not that good
the movie. No, the player, Well, I don't know how
I feel about that. I don't follow baseball.

Speaker 2 (22:42):
Huh. I heard Baby Bonds was him? That's that's not
forty two Jackie Robinson. Oh yeah, no, I've also heard
Jackie one like.

Speaker 3 (22:53):
That right, and he won't. He was good maybe for
the error, but like he wasn't all the time. Barry
Bonds is on steroids, So that's a whole different argument
that we could just omit. He got asterisk on everything.
That boy was juice and juicing. So it wasn't he

(23:14):
in the world run who Armstrong? Oh he had cancer?

Speaker 2 (23:20):
I thought he also did steroids. I wouldn't be surprised.
That's why he was. That's why that was the whole
scanner behind his wristbands.

Speaker 3 (23:30):
I thought that was Phelps brom mixing.

Speaker 2 (23:33):
Up like, ain't never had no my guy. Phelps was
on weed, yes, but I never had no risk bands.
He was on the Whedies box and ain't tuk him off.
That was my guy. So in high school we had
swim class and I was fat and didn't want to
take my shirt off. So I had the right reports
and I got an A on my Michael Fessipport. She

(23:54):
was swimmers. I love fat nigga stories. This should be taking.
It's not even insult to you.

Speaker 3 (24:05):
I just love every fat nigga stories like that that
make me laugh, Like, Okay, when people trying to insol
fat people like you can't do it, like we got
stories like that. You're gonna think you're gonna make me
feel bad.

Speaker 2 (24:17):
Nigga.

Speaker 3 (24:17):
You like swimming, You like to swim and refuse to
swim because you had to take off your shirt. That
ship is hilarious.

Speaker 2 (24:25):
That's because I didn't want to get bro I went
to send me on mother fucking eighty second Vincent get
roasted though? Did you think I was? They was not
gonna talk about how my teas was bigger than the
girls in the class. Nigga, you couldn't be.

Speaker 3 (24:41):
I've had that said about me.

Speaker 2 (24:42):
Whoop my shirt on me too?

Speaker 3 (24:45):
But I wasn't again Vindel representations. See, I was always
the exactly opposite. I was like, yeah, bitch, get some.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
No. I was trying to fuck still.

Speaker 3 (25:00):
The bitches were too busy laughing at them.

Speaker 2 (25:02):
Making hope was a young man's game, but I was
young in the game. I roast twice as hard.

Speaker 3 (25:12):
I roast myself and then thought back at you, I
mean I was eminem inent before he was doing that
ship fun you mean I need eight mile help me?

Speaker 2 (25:21):
Now?

Speaker 3 (25:21):
I got it to have you heard these these jokes
that be thoroughly hilarious, by the way, but it'd be
the fact they could pull it their shirt down in
scenarios jokes what they said, the fact that got shot
and still pull pull this shirt down to make sure
the stomach won showing you have.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
To get a shot.

Speaker 3 (25:38):
That's fucking funny. Y'all don't know like leave me alone,
but I probably would. Yeah, even a stretching me out
my stomach out. I looked like, let me go ahead
and tuk that down real quick. Oh motherfucker, that was boxing.
They slowed the video down, and I'm like, we were
wrong for this. We gotta stop doing this ourselves. It

(26:00):
was was boxing. Got rocked, was on its way down
and still tug this shirt on the way down, and
I was just like, bro, why do we do this?

Speaker 2 (26:10):
I feel like I feel like this. It's the same
way with like the plumber crack. We ain't gonna have
that ship. No, we threw it that ship.

Speaker 3 (26:19):
As what I'm saying, like, fat dudes be the most
like appearance, like conscience individuals on the planet. We ain't
never gonna catch you. Ain't gonna catch us lacking them look, clothing, hygiene.

Speaker 2 (26:33):
Unless you're in our like personal realm, And how the
fuck did you judge us for that?

Speaker 3 (26:38):
Anyway, No, I'm gonna still keep it at least eighty.

Speaker 2 (26:42):
I'm gonna keep you.

Speaker 3 (26:42):
Ain't gonna catch me on a thorough off day, like
a half day, maybe like I might mismatch a fit,
but I'm like Nigga, I'm like I've done that here
where I'm like Nigga's only looking at the top of
half them with some bullshit shorts, like you ain't looking
at the bottom. But I'm not gonna come in hearing
like straight bullshit. I can't do it. I can't do it.

(27:05):
I gotta smell nice. I gotta keep my ship together.
Fat dudes is the most hygienic people on the planet.
I don't care what nobody saying. We got we either
got that shit on or get that shit figured out,
and we're finna talk in, tuck up, tuck our shirts
down when we follow or something like this is part
of it. I'm not finna be belly out on purpose
if I'm conscious, and I know I gotta at least check.

(27:27):
I got different methods, Like I like people just do
the regular tuck.

Speaker 2 (27:31):
Do you do the roll?

Speaker 3 (27:32):
No, you ain't. Never just like roll your shirt this
way to make sure it stretched a little thoroughly.

Speaker 2 (27:37):
Oh shit, y'all, you ain't. We ain't.

Speaker 3 (27:38):
We ain't come from the same cloth.

Speaker 2 (27:40):
My gut.

Speaker 3 (27:41):
Don't be out like that, man, I get you get
a good, nice little tuck underneath, roll it out, make
sure it's nice and fucking fluffed out.

Speaker 2 (27:49):
I was always a belt on top of the belly guy,
so I wasn't gonna get like that. I can't.

Speaker 3 (27:56):
I can't do the belt on the belly. That's always
been a problem for me. I always had to think
a gut, and I got like this might be my
worst like belly size of all time. But I still
got like unnecessary amount of like ab muscle, which pisses
me the fuck off. Why I got ab muscle but

(28:16):
no abs and I'm fat and shit is diabolical, nigga,
Like I do crunches and my shit be tight than
the motherfucker. But I still got a belly like y'all
gotta my body, gotta figure this ship the funk out.

Speaker 2 (28:28):
How much I can suck in? It's crazy? That sounded nuts,
But how much I can suck my stomach can? It's crazy.

Speaker 3 (28:34):
You gotta use whole sentences, man, you gotta use full sentences.
I'm on your side. You cannot say shit like that.

Speaker 2 (28:46):
This ship goes on the internet like I can, like
I can fuck around and go from like Yo goes
on the solo so CoA and ever fucking coming back out.

Speaker 3 (29:00):
You're crazy, that's mad. That's my friend. I'm sorry, I'm
sucking the line. I'm just stung on the line.

Speaker 2 (29:11):
Man. That was a bar.

Speaker 3 (29:14):
That was a whole little Wayne Barr, you didn't even realize.
Let's go to commercial on that note. Specifically, we'll see
in the second.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Hello Nonsense Nation. If you would love to support the podcast,
help us bring more content to you as well as
repid when your circles at your concerts, at your sporting events,
going down to Dirrydryderry dot f and entertainment dot com,
get you a lovely glass, a Nonsense Advisor, or one

(29:45):
of these very very soft hoodies. Don't wait, do it?
Now don't wait for Christmas. Bye, bye for your friend,
Bye for your mama.

Speaker 3 (29:55):
Welcome back to another episode of the Nonsense Podcast. I'm
gonna cutting some of that into.

Speaker 2 (29:59):
To the they give their kids. Miltonio, damn did the
same thing. That's when we're just stalking. Is crazy, right?
Happy Father's Day from us on a Sunday to you
on a Wednesday. Were late, but.

Speaker 3 (30:14):
Father's Day should extend past one day. I know you
ain't get shit with socks anyway. You know you ain't
got nothing of socks. Socks and a sad blow job
like YO day won't that great?

Speaker 2 (30:24):
And I understand, damn hopefully not a sad blow job.
I'm even I'm eve an enthusiastic.

Speaker 3 (30:30):
Blow because you know that was she had to clock
in and she didn't put the work in. Some people
just be clocking in and it ain't right.

Speaker 2 (30:38):
It ain't right. Don't give me no clock in head
because I always put my best foot forward. I don't
want no fucking clock in here. I don't want no
participation trophy. Ass I got into two K. I don't
need the bench player that's happy to be here. I

(30:58):
need the motherfucker's trying to spark.

Speaker 3 (31:03):
I would like for you to comment below what type
of head without saying specifically, but give me one of
them analogies.

Speaker 2 (31:09):
What kind of head did you get?

Speaker 3 (31:11):
Did you get you know, fourth quarter Lebron, current fourth
quarter Court, current fourth quarter Lebron. He be out there,
he be out there. Did you get Westbrook? Did you
get twenty twenty one Westbrook? That's a difference, that's know
what I'm saying, a different beast, you know. But then

(31:33):
you could also get James Harden? Did you get regular
season to playoff Harden? Regular season be stating the Pats
padding the stats? Thank you, but then playoff Harden?

Speaker 2 (31:48):
Don't?

Speaker 3 (31:48):
They don't show up at all?

Speaker 2 (31:50):
Are you?

Speaker 3 (31:50):
Or you might have just got podcast Pete. You might
have got some podcast Pete. And that's diabolically bad.

Speaker 2 (31:58):
I know a lot of work in another reason. But
now what then I paid you? You know what that was?

Speaker 3 (32:10):
She was? She was running the mouth about how it
was Finna be.

Speaker 2 (32:15):
Davis is the street clothes, always got a headache, mouth
always hurt, never raised a suit. Jesus so catthead.

Speaker 3 (32:32):
I told you I don't mind you being a little sassy,
but damn you took it to a whole new level.
When Nick Young be roasting you, that's when you know
you wade two days. Come on, bro, like pigote. That's
what I'm saying. It's okay, And I'm saying it's okay,

(32:53):
but don't fake it. That's all I be saying. Like
he'd be out there faking it some days. And I'm like,
we've seen you, We've been seeing you said it, and
I'm co signing the closes for clothes, nigga, get your
ass out the closet you are in l with with
Elton John's fit. Like you ain't even in the You
ain't even in the man's department.

Speaker 2 (33:13):
The who you uh for your press? See who you are?
Maybe I don't know. I don't know either way.

Speaker 3 (33:27):
I got a game for us to play. I've been
I've been cooking up some games lately. I've been bored,
cooking up these great.

Speaker 2 (33:34):
Games, trying to bring back toys Rush.

Speaker 3 (33:37):
Maybe, Hey, who's a good card company?

Speaker 2 (33:41):
Cars Stops?

Speaker 3 (33:43):
That's for playing cards though, I want a video I
want a game company. It's got dude, how me make
card games?

Speaker 2 (33:52):
You kio? All right? Motherfuck?

Speaker 3 (33:55):
I'm not talking about I'm talking about like board game
card people like cars against humanity. Either way, I think right,
I was gonna say, either way, I got this new game,
and it's fun for me watching podcasts because as a
podcast I do typically watch all the podcasts because I
be bored and they had in one of these had
cut I think it's like three that had a conversation

(34:17):
similar to this, and I was like, I'm gonna turn
this into.

Speaker 2 (34:19):
The whole game.

Speaker 3 (34:20):
I call this you're doing it wrong because there's a
lot of people doing stuff out here that seems common
to them and the rest of the world not so much.
So I got a few of these topics I would
like for everybody here to answer honestly, and especially everybody
at home, because I'm not judging, but I sometimes I

(34:40):
need to know if I'm the weird one, you know
what I mean. And that's that's pretty much all of this.
So I'm gonna just throw out a couple of random topics,
random questions, and just answer honestly. We'll start simple, just
to kind of get you get your eased into it,
Just kind.

Speaker 2 (34:54):
Of get you eased into it.

Speaker 3 (34:58):
Do you answer phone calls from unknown numbers?

Speaker 2 (35:01):
Hell? Never? However, do you.

Speaker 3 (35:05):
Listen to the voicemail after the fact, though sometimes I
don't even listen to the voicemail. I don't even listen
to motherfucking voicemail. You know why, because if you needed
to contact me a, you would have first made yourself
known and b get you should have at this point
my email or phone number to text me. Why is

(35:25):
you not texting me if it's that important? Why would
you leave me a voicemail? Who the fuck is leaving
voicemail still.

Speaker 2 (35:33):
Like that? Bothers me?

Speaker 3 (35:35):
Am I by myself on that hill? Are you still
leaving voicemails in twenty twenty five or you're just not
texting a motherfucker.

Speaker 2 (35:40):
After If I'm very angry, if it depends on how
many time I'll called you.

Speaker 3 (35:46):
I'm gonna call you twice and then I'm hitting you
with a text, and then I'm done. You want to
talk to me, then you can call me back. I'm
never putting in a pen to listen.

Speaker 2 (35:55):
To a voicemail. That's still you still got do that.

Speaker 3 (36:00):
I don't know because I don't listen to don't I
don't know.

Speaker 2 (36:06):
I have no idea.

Speaker 3 (36:07):
I have visual voicemail, I delete, I use visual voicemail
just the delete voicemails fanst I don't be listening to
them shits. I don't be reading them shits.

Speaker 2 (36:16):
Word now minds that come up with it'll transcribe it.

Speaker 3 (36:19):
Yeah, I'm all you did was make it easy for
me to delete because now and go check check check delete,
instead of having to tap seven extra fans to like
skip delete, skip delete. I'm not doing none of that.
Just ignore delete. You need me, you call me, beat me,
didn't text me, bitch, like if you want you if
you make it to the three step verification to me,
and I don't call you back, didn't want to talk

(36:41):
to you in the first place. Pretty simple.

Speaker 2 (36:44):
If now it's only like one or two people, I'm
calling this many times, If I call you five times,
I'm giving you that salty voicemail because you need to
hear how pissed.

Speaker 3 (37:01):
But then they got voice messages that you can son,
I'm just not gonna leave a voicemail.

Speaker 2 (37:07):
That's all of it.

Speaker 3 (37:08):
I think it's something about voicemail that's archaic to me
that you gotta dial in to listen to what the
fuck I said, Like, funk out of here with this
arcade no more. I don't but you get my point.
This is a whole separate process. I gotta put the
phone up to my ear, and shit, like, what are
we doing here? Like just walking and and before you
and anybody will say something if you want them. Igorom

(37:29):
motherfuckers that be on speaker twenty four seven, I'm gonna
punch you.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
I am going to punch you if.

Speaker 3 (37:34):
You are not in your own vicinity and your hands
is doing something like the only time y'all you should
be on speakerphone is you need your hands for something else.
If you just be walking with your phone in front
of you, speaker, I'm gonna punch you in your mouth
because that shit is annoying as fuck to me. If
it ain't two other people that need to hit this conversation,

(37:55):
get your ass off a speaker, get some headphones, or
just put the motherfucker to your ear.

Speaker 2 (38:02):
That's all I'm asking you. Get showed stupid ass off speakerphone.

Speaker 3 (38:06):
I guess I could have let that be another one,
but but I feel like that shouldn even be a conversation.
Who out here using speakerphone for single for one on
one conversations one on one and then it'll be motherfuckers
on the CTA be mad that you over here and
they whole fucking debacle, Like, maybe press that same button
that you put them on speaker with, take the motherfucker off.

Speaker 2 (38:29):
I don't, but why mm hmm.

Speaker 3 (38:33):
Put some headphones on.

Speaker 2 (38:35):
They make those, Yeah, but now have phones. Don't be
coming with jacks no more.

Speaker 3 (38:41):
Then get the wireless ones. You think nigga's gonna they
got them?

Speaker 2 (38:47):
Yeah, but you think they's gonna pay for that?

Speaker 3 (38:49):
Who did steal them?

Speaker 2 (38:51):
Whoa ship? Now you're nigga.

Speaker 3 (38:55):
It should be a crying to be on speaker. Both
of them is irritating.

Speaker 2 (39:00):
This fuck to me? Why I gotta hear your whole conversation,
Well a little tates hay in them, like, I.

Speaker 3 (39:06):
Don't give a fuck. Shut that, shut up, get off
the phone where you even at?

Speaker 2 (39:11):
That happens to you allow.

Speaker 3 (39:13):
Too often in too many places, in public trains, buses.
If I go to a mall, it's always a nigga
on the phone in the mall. And now you on
trains like that. You have a car, can't I like
to take public sometimes? Man? It's well no, it's sometimes.

Speaker 2 (39:28):
Man.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
Parking be atrocious. Parking be atrocious, and Metro is nice
I like the Metro. Metro is very nice, you know what,
atrocious what humans?

Speaker 2 (39:39):
True?

Speaker 3 (39:40):
But also my wallet needs to be less, so sometimes
you just gotta take public.

Speaker 2 (39:45):
It's know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (39:46):
If I'm gonna go downtown Chicago, it's sixteen different ways
I can get downtown Chicago on public and not have
to pay thirty five dollars in parking.

Speaker 2 (39:52):
Just throwing that out though. One of the ways going Sunday.

Speaker 3 (39:56):
True, but not everything be available on Sunday, and that's
only And that's not for Millennium Parking though, either, because
Millenium Park is still finna charging.

Speaker 2 (40:03):
But I lost my hook up and that shit bothers me.

Speaker 3 (40:07):
So I got another one. Are you doing this wrong?
And I feel like I might be almost solo on
this one? Almost Do y'all wash your phone screens often?

Speaker 2 (40:19):
Sometimes I'll hit it with some sandy some who sanitizer, sanitize?
How often? Thought I should? Probably?

Speaker 3 (40:30):
No, I'm very curious how often? Because I think I
might be solo on this one.

Speaker 2 (40:34):
What do you never do it? I do it once
a day.

Speaker 3 (40:36):
Oh no, I'm daily with my fucking screen cleaning. I've
lived through COVID, y'all, niggas is nasty.

Speaker 2 (40:44):
That's true. But I'm typically the only one touching my phone. Yeah, man,
I typically don't have my phone to my face.

Speaker 3 (40:53):
Yeah, but your hands touch shit, true, and your hands
touch your phone, it's another surface to me. I feel
like I should wash it more often. I feel like
once a day, don't be a dollarge. I got one
of those, wasn't it. I got one of those UV
things at one point to like UV like my fucking
phone because I'm just like dude, I want them germs

(41:14):
to find there's more germs on your phone than a
toilet seat. That's crazy, That's that's nuts. And again, I
lived through COVID. No, I'm watching that shit. I gotta
watch that shit. Clarks wipes, sanitizing wipes, scream clean all
I got like a set. I take my screen off,
I change I'm Kelly be hating that shit. I changed

(41:37):
my screen protector often, like screen protector gets changed out,
like every three to six months. Three to six months,
I need a new screen protector. And sometimes because I
finally got the crack on it. But sometimes it be
just like I had this one too long my phone case.
I gotta change out these motherfuckers is nasty after a minute,

(41:57):
and take that bitch off. I thoroughly clear and my watches.
People don't do that shit Like I feel like I'm
a woman on that one every week. Every day, I
gotta at least hit it with the white. Then every
week I got to disassemble and then thoroughly get everything
good one good time, and it ain't gotta be like crazy,
but just like a good wipe down it. Don't make
sure you know all the creases around the lights and lenses.

(42:21):
I feel like I'm by myself on that one. Once
a week sounds crazy to people, and I'm like, no,
I at least wipe it down the daily. Kelly, what
you do? I feel like you don't wipe yours at all.

Speaker 2 (42:31):
Yes, I might do like once a week.

Speaker 1 (42:36):
I don't do it every day or unless it's dirty
and visibly dirty, every.

Speaker 3 (42:41):
Day at least a white at least just one. Because
I do it when I'm doing other convenient shit. I
will say that like I find time to do it,
like if I'm at work, and then I'm like, all right,
I wipe my desk down at work, which apparently people
think that's crazy to do that every day, but I
wipe that bitch down, hit to Clark's wipe, and then
when I'm done with that, grab one last one over

(43:03):
the phone. Damn, bam both sides.

Speaker 2 (43:05):
But the damn. I don't claim my phone as much
because I try to keep my hands really clean. Your
hands are still nasty. You still carry germs and you
touch your phone. I use Sam Tyler a lot, like
My brother called me addicted one time, but I was
also the front end manager dealing with all the money. No, hell, yeah,

(43:30):
that's nasty. Yeah yeah, no, I was being pure with
best buddies as it should be, though, as it should be.
I think people don't know. That's another thing.

Speaker 3 (43:42):
I don't think people understand how nasty money is. Oh yeah,
that that's one.

Speaker 2 (43:47):
Of the things I'm so glad we're getting away with.
I'm so glad we're doing away with physical.

Speaker 3 (43:51):
Money, physical money. I'm fifty to fifty on that.

Speaker 2 (43:53):
But call me conspiracy theory. Niggas getting rid of pennies.

Speaker 3 (43:55):
Brod, that's kind of I'm I'm not mad.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
They're one kids that don't know what the penny is.
That's nuts.

Speaker 3 (44:09):
Yeah, the kids don't know about cash ship fuh.

Speaker 2 (44:15):
By the Canucks.

Speaker 3 (44:16):
I don't want to be The Canadians got rid of
pennies and they round up sometimes and I don't. I
don't need that in my life because if the Canadians
do it for damn surear Americans is gonna do it
all that came out to full ninety six, We're gonna
round it up to five dollars. No, nigga, I want
my full sent back. Fuck you. They're folk in add up.

Speaker 2 (44:37):
I mean, yeah, but I don't do that to me
on a card. But then they do card up charges.

Speaker 3 (44:44):
That's why I still carry cash because a lot of places.

Speaker 2 (44:46):
Motherfuckers just up charge me for card.

Speaker 3 (44:49):
At firehouse, see I carry.

Speaker 2 (44:53):
I carry not a lot.

Speaker 3 (44:54):
But I carry some petty cash when it's visible that
they fine up chargem like, no, you can have this,
you can have this cash.

Speaker 2 (44:59):
Change. Only cash I have right now is that two
dollars bill that stripper gave me. I talked about that
on the show You did.

Speaker 3 (45:06):
I just it just some things you again, some statements
gotta have context by behind it, because when I'm just saying,
just saying that the stripper gave you money, opens the
world up for questions.

Speaker 2 (45:19):
I'm that guy.

Speaker 3 (45:21):
Are you a pimp. Oh ship, Yeah, that's what I thought.
That was just like it was like, bitch, better have
my money kind of vibe.

Speaker 2 (45:29):
I'm no, all right, if you're new here, I'm an
uber driver man who slid a stripper two dollars. That
motherfucker was crisp, Like I know they don't be in ATMs,
but it felt like it came out of one. That's
what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (45:44):
That's so somebody slid hug crisp two dollar bill at work.

Speaker 2 (45:49):
You're a wild boy.

Speaker 3 (45:52):
I ain't mad at it. I ain't mad at it.

Speaker 2 (45:54):
That's a flex, but it kind of like I felt
like that think is a regular because I feel like
she give it to other uber drivers like I feel
like she passed two thousand bills out. She had the
whole speech with it. She was like, here's some luck
for your day. That a good day, like like you
know they're supposed to be lucky or whatever. Hold on

(46:16):
to it. Crazy.

Speaker 3 (46:18):
That's actually insane. I'm not mad at it. It's just
it's weird.

Speaker 2 (46:25):
All right.

Speaker 3 (46:26):
I got one for you because you might be the
only one that can answer this on the show. Is
it okay to FaceTime somebody without warning, you got silent.

Speaker 2 (46:42):
It depends on the relationship. I feel like the only
people it might be okay with is like your girl
and your mom. Maybe not your mom, depending on west
stage she had in her life, because she might be,
you know, still out there. It's okay you didn't have
just any of that. But like, I'm facetimed my girl,

(47:04):
but with no warning. Hell yeah, that's what the fuck
are you doing that? I can't see I don't know
why are you facetiming people? Like I'm still on that
that conversation, Like, what's the point of a fucking face time?
Well between me and my girl? I love you so much.
I want to see your face because I'm not there.

(47:26):
Look man, it's it's that's cute. That's ships candigato.

Speaker 3 (47:32):
I lobt you was go skip to keep part of
you know, but I'm saying that's cute.

Speaker 2 (47:39):
It's condescending as I can't say I'm glad. I'm giva a.

Speaker 3 (47:46):
Funk about your face right now. I think I got
questions that I need answers to. I think the only
time I did.

Speaker 2 (47:51):
And sometimes I need to see your face while I
ask these questions.

Speaker 3 (47:54):
No, the only time I've used a video call. Was
which one of these motherfucker products you need? Showing that
bitch off like I need you to the one you need.
I don't need a fucking video. I don't give a
funk about your face. I got a quick conversation.

Speaker 2 (48:06):
Most times I don't do that. Most times I take
a picture before I do that. I was just video.

Speaker 3 (48:11):
That's I think that's what video calls are for. It's
like I need the shop for you. You tell me what
the fuck you need?

Speaker 2 (48:16):
Here?

Speaker 3 (48:16):
Go all this ship they got? Which one work for you?

Speaker 2 (48:19):
Now?

Speaker 3 (48:19):
I gotta send pictures that you gotta get uploaded. It
might be fuzzy, it might be a bad shot. You
might need to read some ingredients on the back. No,
you get this video call, Let me see what you
got and move on.

Speaker 2 (48:32):
I don't.

Speaker 3 (48:34):
I just don't like video calls. So I might be
just different in general.

Speaker 2 (48:37):
But everybody else get a yo? What you're doing? All right?
Are you? Are you busy?

Speaker 3 (48:44):
I think in that same time frame, if you could
have asked me what the fuck you needed to ask me?

Speaker 2 (48:48):
I haven't. You're not my only friend that feels like that.
I feel like both what what's this? Son? Against his
son Quirk. Yeah, okay, I'm a Gemini friend just like that,
Like he don't want no fucking greetings. Get to the point, nigga.

Speaker 3 (49:08):
Yeah, Like I'm just like.

Speaker 2 (49:11):
Yo, what's good? And you're like, what the fuck do
you want? I'm like, damn, I'm bothering you.

Speaker 3 (49:18):
Not. There's pleasantries and then there's you what are you
side stepping? Like get to the point. You can start
with hey, how hello?

Speaker 2 (49:26):
What was good? If I ain't talk to you in
three months, I'm not getting to the point I'm saying hello.

Speaker 3 (49:31):
Yeah, you can say hello the fu. But there's a
difference between hello and pleasantries.

Speaker 2 (49:35):
That is what I'm saying. I think that oh yeah, no,
like you ain't gotta be like how's this? How sucking
you off? Greeting? Because I ain't spoke to you right now?

Speaker 3 (49:44):
Greetings is fine.

Speaker 2 (49:46):
But he'll be like, all right, put all that ship
in one mess.

Speaker 3 (49:52):
Now, yes, yeah, get that ship out the weather?

Speaker 2 (49:56):
You get two?

Speaker 3 (49:57):
Hey, what's good? How you doing?

Speaker 2 (50:00):
That's it?

Speaker 3 (50:02):
Because I know, first of all, I don't care about
none of that, like hello, it's stupid already because no
ship you called me? Why am I saying hello? Like
this is dumb the fuck you won't mind you. That's
not even how phone calls were supposed to start. It
was a hoy, I'm older, I'm old. Yeah boy, the
old og was supposed to say, ay, I forgot what

(50:22):
the call call back was, but it was a hoy
something else. Hello is some dumb shit. I figured I
think Hello is capitalism shit, like dead ass serious.

Speaker 2 (50:33):
That was some like marketing bullshit. And then people switch
a Hello up after the centers. I ain't saying, I
ain't telling niggas welcome no more.

Speaker 3 (50:40):
I'm mad it took you to centers to follow basic
vampire rule, by the way, but no, no, I skipped
all the pleasantries because first of all, why are you
calling me? Because obviously, if you're calling me, some shit
needs to get discussed. I'm not calling you for like,
so what you if you're doing that? She get the

(51:01):
fuck off my phone, like dad ass serious, get the
fuck off my phone. If you've fensha pull some some
and the nicest way saying some girl shit, the fuck
off my phone with this girl shit, I don't want
to casually conversate right now.

Speaker 2 (51:15):
Baby. I one if the thigga's guilty of that it
could be.

Speaker 3 (51:18):
Maybe I'm not. I'm not.

Speaker 2 (51:20):
I'm not calling my nigga to say good night. No,
I'm not there with it.

Speaker 3 (51:26):
Good thank you.

Speaker 2 (51:27):
I will like goddamn, there's nothing wrong with butter and
some bread. Whatever the conversation, nigga, not a fucking email thread?
What the fuck?

Speaker 3 (51:37):
But my thing is, so didn't invite me to a place,
then we can have a conversation. Get the fuck off
my phone with this pleasantry shit.

Speaker 2 (51:46):
Maybe it could just.

Speaker 3 (51:46):
Because I'm an old nigga and my phone used to
add minutes, Like run this fucking conversation down because you
costing me money, and maybe now run the com say something, nigga.
We can have pleasant trees in person, but on the phone, nigga,
I might be doing some shit. You just gonna stop
my busy day to just go what you what you

(52:09):
up to you nigga? What's on your mind?

Speaker 2 (52:12):
Nigga?

Speaker 3 (52:12):
Before I hang up this phone, that's some girls shit.
And the last time I did that is when me
and Kelly live separately. Is We'll have some casual, unnecessarily
long ass conversation.

Speaker 2 (52:26):
But after a while, I'm just like the funk were
we doing?

Speaker 3 (52:29):
Say what you gotta sing. Get the funk off my phone.
I want to watch TV. It's fine, but after a while,
ac cording needs to stop, so we could just we
got a casual conversation, but have a point, have a
story to tell or something. I'm trying to play the
game like. I can't be sitting like this talking to

(52:53):
you about jack shit. Like, bitch, get off my phone,
playing cat. It sounds that you need to hear and
I can't hear nigga footsteps because you just sitting here breathing.

Speaker 2 (53:04):
Get the fun off my phone. I was fit roast.

Speaker 3 (53:12):
We all did it, but damn do I hate that
error of talking on the phone till a nigga fall asleep.

Speaker 2 (53:17):
I was just fitna be real vulnerable on this fucking broadcast.
That's OK, but I die for you. Just wear real
fucking I know.

Speaker 3 (53:26):
It's fine, we didn't, but that's some childish ship. Be
in your current Nigga Venny and the team behind you.
Ain't shut that ship up. Hang off the phone, nigga
tenas off my fucking number. Click well, I be waiting

(53:50):
for a snore in a conversation.

Speaker 2 (53:55):
Go do something to else.

Speaker 3 (53:59):
Talking to a bitch sleep.

Speaker 2 (54:00):
Y'all, y'all, Wow, y'all, Wow, that's good. That's cute. Gays.
Hell you gotta you can.

Speaker 3 (54:12):
I just in in in favor. Man, we are we
are adults. I'm just saying it's cute that you get
to roll it back to your teens. That's some butterfly
and the stomach ass boy, that's some soft ass ship though. Man,
that's soft as stool baby. That's softest baby.

Speaker 2 (54:26):
Boo boo. And it'll pass, It'll all pass, and then
you'll grow up.

Speaker 3 (54:37):
And then what the funk was we doing? I'm not
saying I never did it, but damn you'll never catch
me doing it again.

Speaker 2 (54:46):
But you've also lived with yours for seven years, and.

Speaker 3 (54:50):
I'm saying if I didn't, if we I had to
find another bitch, I wouldn't do that. I'm too old
for that now. I'm too fucking old. If we Finn,
be cool, cool with the kidd man, Get the fuck
off my line.

Speaker 2 (55:05):
He got half of this ship.

Speaker 3 (55:07):
You can do this ship in person. You can hang
out with me in person. Funk off my phone on
my phone. The phones ain't even shaped for that ship
no more.

Speaker 2 (55:18):
What the fuck I mean?

Speaker 3 (55:21):
That's nice for you. My ship is flat, Nigga, I'm
not gonna have this ship up tomorrow. It's hot than
a motherfucker on screen. Nigga, what are we.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
Doing over here? Incredibly speak of fall, but then you
can't hear me.

Speaker 3 (55:37):
Both of us are sitting here fucking no hear what?
Y'all are both snoring? Battery charger.

Speaker 2 (55:48):
Fun off my phone? Shall presence be a piece? No?
Are we?

Speaker 3 (55:56):
I didn't even get to half of these. I got
a couple of moment let me do a few more these. Okay,
here's another one. Do you share a towe with your
significant other?

Speaker 2 (56:05):
Fuck? No, No, women are disgusting, that's true.

Speaker 3 (56:09):
I'm not saying that, But I'm also like, it's a towel.

Speaker 2 (56:12):
Also, I do the laundry. I mean at my house,
she has a set up. She has a tower in
my house and at her house.

Speaker 3 (56:20):
She got specific towns, like y'all that bougie.

Speaker 2 (56:23):
Like.

Speaker 3 (56:23):
What I'm saying is like you got like you got
your own, Like, don't use my towel period?

Speaker 2 (56:30):
Or is it like you have your town so why
would you use mine? Know?

Speaker 3 (56:33):
What I'm saying is like, say, fresh out of laundry,
do you have like this blue one is for me,
and then that one is yours.

Speaker 2 (56:42):
I'm feeling do the laundry. I'm hanging up.

Speaker 3 (56:44):
My towel and I'm hanging up So you got a
towel preset, is what I'm saying, Like you have a
predetermined toile for Okay, That's what I was mostly asked,
like you got this has always been my town day one.
It's just after use it becomes my to wash this.

Speaker 2 (57:02):
This is gonna be somebody's until the next wash.

Speaker 3 (57:05):
Right, Okay, That's what I was That's more of my saying.
I'm like, do you have like color coated people?

Speaker 2 (57:10):
Weird? You was gonna call me a super fan if
I had heaven Hers before marriage. I don't know it
was Finna. He was gonna get me out the paint
check for something like bro Bro.

Speaker 3 (57:27):
I don't think his hers is that bad. Also, I'm
picky about how I used my towel, Like I got
three towels for every for all cleaning. I got body
dry and then I got sections on the towel.

Speaker 2 (57:41):
Then I gotta use.

Speaker 3 (57:42):
I don't know if that's what it's fow with that
dividing line at the top half of your towel like
that top half that small bit is for face. I'm
not drying my body off with.

Speaker 2 (57:52):
The will probably just get a second wash cloth for face.

Speaker 3 (57:58):
No, I have a second wash cloth for face, So
I I have a loof of and then a washcloth
of face. But my child, my drawing child, is a
section that I use for face and in the section
for body, I'm gonna use that nuts on face. I'm
still I'm not Nigga. Now I don't need even my nuts.
I don't want my nuts on face. But then I'm
just like, I don't know if Kelly following them same

(58:20):
rules I've never asked, and we share a towe.

Speaker 2 (58:23):
I'm just like, are you right? Then? You've been all
that just to get to y'all do share?

Speaker 3 (58:28):
I'm saying, but I have child drawing preferences, and I'm
just like, I don't know if she do the same.

Speaker 2 (58:33):
Ship absolutely crazy because if she don't fall the you
just got coucie in your face. So my face was
there at some point, yes, but but no, but but no,
that's the type of place for everything. That time.

Speaker 3 (58:54):
I think that might be the only time that this
no bad time or place.

Speaker 2 (59:00):
I disagree. I got money to go get that's definitely
a bad time of place for Kouchie on my face,
I'm sorry a whiff.

Speaker 3 (59:08):
That's the whiff nigga.

Speaker 2 (59:10):
Everyone said.

Speaker 3 (59:11):
If I get a whiff, I'm a wanted and now
we gotta go now now fuck our schedule. I've done
that too, That's that's that's effect delight. Sometimes you gotta
be late to work. Sometimes you just gotta be late
to work. And it is what it is.

Speaker 2 (59:30):
Yeah, but despite, okay, despite what may be displayed on
the weekends, because this is this is a weekend recording. Sorry,
k FA, I try to be quite punctional and fucking up.

(59:51):
My punctuality was the main downfall of my last working
ship because that was homeless and did not always made
me late to everything.

Speaker 3 (01:00:03):
Well, there's a difference in being a little late, you know,
fashionably late nigga. Time and clothes gotta coordinate. But there's
a difference between being an habitual late nigga and if
you don't see pee time twenty four seven, nigga, row
your clocks back, nigga, maybe be on daylight Saving time
twenty four seven or something. I'm that's one of the
things I disliked about my new car. I couldn't set

(01:00:25):
the time ahead because that's what I did on my
last car.

Speaker 2 (01:00:28):
I set the time ahead. So even if I'm late,
I'm still old time or early.

Speaker 3 (01:00:34):
You could just be or you could just be early,
though you gotta you still fooling yourself to be.

Speaker 2 (01:00:39):
Really, Yes, that's crazy because though I do try to
be very punctual, I'm also procrastinated by habit. It's a
very tough struggle internally that I go through.

Speaker 3 (01:00:54):
I mean, I'm not mad at it. Again, I'm saying
be on time about that.

Speaker 2 (01:00:59):
If I could delete one thing for myself, it would
be procrastination.

Speaker 3 (01:01:03):
No, I get that. I feel you. I'm gonna try
to separate town thing. I was thinking about it. But also,
like Kelly, gotta do laundry, towels take a lot of.

Speaker 2 (01:01:13):
Extra laundry too, though not really.

Speaker 3 (01:01:16):
How often are you changing your towels?

Speaker 2 (01:01:18):
One extra towel ain't gonna sucking blow?

Speaker 3 (01:01:21):
Yeah, but how often you change your towels should have
been a followup course right away, one to two weeks.
One of two weeks, oh ship, I might change every
three days.

Speaker 2 (01:01:33):
Every three days, three days. It's all I need for
my tail after that laundry. It's a weekly occurrence.

Speaker 3 (01:01:40):
A yeah, and you need most towns you get at home.
You just got one, what I'm saying, So run through
the list. Every three days, switch a towel. I prefer
every other day, but every three days.

Speaker 2 (01:01:55):
Seems other day is nuts. How many towers do you
have in your home?

Speaker 3 (01:01:58):
No less than six? Six s eight? They cheat eight?

Speaker 2 (01:02:03):
Yeah, God damn for two of y'all. Why not the
time eight full length tiles, full left toils. You get
eight full length, four face tiles, four bottles. Wish see
that's my next place. Gotta have a fucking linen closet.

Speaker 3 (01:02:20):
Yes, linen closets are nice. That that might be the
gayest part of this episode so far. I like a
linen closet. That was like the one thing I did
when I this reconstruction in the house. I turned my
closet my personal closet, and I was like, top half
of this bitch off, I need a linen closet. Moved
the door to this like I had them reconstruct walls,
and shit, I need a motherfucking linen closet. And y'all
ain't gonna just get away with not me having I.

Speaker 2 (01:02:41):
Don't have ship. Yeah, somehow still like not enough like
I feel like I got I got. I have not
enough ship, but still too much shit. It's weird, you.

Speaker 3 (01:02:49):
Know why, because you don't have looks and cranny's in
your household. A lot of people don't understand that them
licks and crannies and drawer space and linen closets.

Speaker 2 (01:02:57):
It makes a world of difference.

Speaker 3 (01:02:58):
Like we just gotta finally got a sh I'm like,
sh racks are kind of necessary.

Speaker 2 (01:03:03):
You got a bad place to put your shoes. Shout
out to you, you got a fourier in your house?
I would love a fo you.

Speaker 3 (01:03:09):
I would love it for you. But I ain't that
kind of rich. I ain't ain't. I ain't got that
kind of money. I don't live in that type of city.
Making no more, No, No, they ain't, No, they ain't.
All right, the last one, and then we can end
the episode. Do you sleep with the TV on or
Pitch Black?

Speaker 2 (01:03:29):
My girl hate that ship? I like. I like having
the TV on. I like having the TV on, but
I do admit that I probably knock out faster with
ship Black. Yeah, I don't know. I like having something

(01:03:53):
hearing I like hearing something and and not like I
used to do rain sounds. I used to do for
fucking like good vibrations, aspirational quotes and ship. I just
do all that. That's fucked up. Part is when I
was listening to the aspirational quotes and the high vibrations
when I was with was when I was my most depressed.

(01:04:16):
You needed the assistance that No, like that was the
fucked up period during my time went down. That was
going on. God, yeah, no, when I stopped.

Speaker 3 (01:04:28):
To get better, you know why, cause you stopped. You
stopped thinking about us being about it. That's all it was.
I personally preferred pitch black. Kelly hates it, so we
I'm fine with dealing with the TV sounds. But then
the promise is I'm a light sleeper. So thankfully now
everything that gets watched at night is entering my dream state,

(01:04:50):
and it should be fucking me all the way.

Speaker 2 (01:04:52):
The funk up.

Speaker 3 (01:04:52):
I have nothing but either nightmares or wild story dreams.
And I'm just like, bro, what the fuck? And because
of that, now I just got I wake up and
I bug her with that shit immediately, and I'm like, look,
I know this is partially your fault, So now you
gotta wake up at two in the morning. You hear
this wild ass dream I had to have because the
TV's on and we're watching YouTube videos in the middle
of the night.

Speaker 2 (01:05:14):
I'm glad that should not. One thing that chaps my
ass the most about a lot of these streaming services
is that they will have a volume cap for the
actual show and remove that bitch for the fucking commercials.
Oh my god, why the fuck are the Hulu is.

Speaker 3 (01:05:35):
A rare egregious so this Hulu? Why are the Fuckmazon?

Speaker 2 (01:05:39):
Why the fuck are y'all fucking commercials on a billion?

Speaker 3 (01:05:43):
Specifically paramount because I'll be in there watching SpongeBob. SpongeBob
be nice and mellow being as suits commercial Nikola, bitch,
turn the gone down?

Speaker 2 (01:05:54):
Damn?

Speaker 3 (01:05:55):
Why is the soul god?

Speaker 2 (01:05:56):
Damn? Like, why the fuck are you yet? Why is
the progressive yelling at me? I'm just trying to watch
fucking dort some shit.

Speaker 3 (01:06:05):
So tired, so tired and YouTube Once again, I would
just like to remind you if I catch another fucking
ninety plus commercial on you, I'm choke.

Speaker 2 (01:06:15):
I'm choke sling, and they do it on the on
the videos I be the most interesting. Yeah, like Nigga,
I really trying to get this content.

Speaker 3 (01:06:25):
And then you're like, oh, you want to hit this
whole lass podcast. Like Nigga, what I told you? I
woke up to Forever Red. It's a commercial and I
didn't know how to feel. I'm like, I love Pound Rangers,
but also I can't rewind this is a fucking ad.
Why did I get a Forever Red ad? And then
I'm just like, maybe we should throw nonsense up as commercials,

(01:06:45):
like maybe I should start falling sleeping my ship.

Speaker 2 (01:06:47):
Fuck y'all.

Speaker 3 (01:06:48):
I mean you could just do it anyway. We got
a playlist like no Skin Off Your Nose. But I'm
just saying, like the ads need to chill out, and
if you're gonna have these long ass ads, don't give
me this buffer time to skip bring back the met
Skip five seconds is all you're getting, and I'm skipping
your ship.

Speaker 1 (01:07:04):
No.

Speaker 2 (01:07:04):
I used to be you hit skip and then go
back to the video. Now you just skip to another
fucking ad.

Speaker 3 (01:07:11):
Yeah, they got to skip to christ That's ridiculous.

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
That's so ridiculous. I apologize to everybody.

Speaker 3 (01:07:18):
I be feeling bad just for the amount of ads
that we have on our on our listener base, and
I'm like, look, I'm trying to get paid.

Speaker 2 (01:07:24):
I don't like the ads.

Speaker 3 (01:07:25):
That's why you should just subscribe to the subscription service
for us.

Speaker 2 (01:07:30):
No ads, You could just do that two dollars. You
subscribe to everything else.

Speaker 3 (01:07:35):
Why not? I'm less than the only Fans model, and
I fuck a lot of less people.

Speaker 2 (01:07:41):
I don't know if that if you're trying to make
a case for yourself for them.

Speaker 3 (01:07:44):
No, for me, I'm a decent human being. He's bitch
out here for a thousand a day.

Speaker 2 (01:07:51):
That's the right one on a two dollars deal? Girl,
that bough that is fucking boy? Are you kidding me?
You can keep that, good man, I'm paying the prices.

Speaker 3 (01:08:04):
It's speaking of which, to thirdly end this episode, did
you hear about that dude that broke off a date
with a bitch because he found out she had an
only fans I thought that was hilarious, and she because
she got super upset about it. And he was like,
why would I take you to dinner for a hundred
plus when I can see what I want to see
for two fifty? And I'm just like, yeah, actually, and

(01:08:24):
somebody who was like, well, seeing ain't the same as feeling,
and I'm just like, but two dollars to two dollars,
Maybe it's just a preview. Maybe I want a sample
before about the whole thing. You never know, and again
if she actively working.

Speaker 2 (01:08:40):
Plus, I mean, I don't know, because the dinner could
be an audition. You might end up with a co
star role. I don't want it. On it, I don't
want it. No, I mean teaching bad enough and having
a time.

Speaker 3 (01:09:00):
What I'll see you next time. We done had a
lot of bad visuals today. Happy Father's Day, Pride Month
and and men, work on your mental health for damn sure, God,
damn goodbye.

Speaker 2 (01:09:09):
I see you later. Jesus Christ

All Episodes

Flamin’ Hot Lies, Fat Guy Struggles & You’re Doing It Wrong!! - Nonsense Podcast S4E80

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

Dateline NBC

New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Flamin’ Hot Lies, Fat Guy Struggles & You’re Doing It Wrong!! - Nonsense Podcast S4E80