Episode Transcript
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(00:32):
The Thompson Whack Program, Win SiverMcGee and Molly milchaelis Johnson's Whack and Johnson
Self Pollocking Low cost Present Marion andJim Jordan. That Fiver mcgeheon Molly with
Jimmy Shields, Bill Thompson and BillyMills orchestra. The show opens with Lonza,
(01:26):
your night is a big night inWest pro Vista or Gone with the
Wind is having its formal opening atthe Biju Theater. The cream of society
will be there. So here intheir living room, getting ready to use
the ticket someone mischievously sent them.We find the underdone bottom of wis for
Vista's Uppercross Fever McGee and Molly.Hey, well, where'd you put that?
(01:53):
Button hooks? Button hook Yeah,button Hooksgie, don't tell me?
Or go to a formal opening wearingthem yellow shoes at the box toes now,
why well, you know I wouldn'tdo no uncouth stuff like that.
There. I want to use itto button my vet. Oh there,
I'll hope. Parlo Wilcox remembers tosend over that size seventeen collar. Megie,
(02:19):
are you sure there was no messagewith those tickets? No? Just
the two tickets in an envelope,but the under the front door. Well,
I hope we can find out whosent him so we can thank him.
Yeah, you bet. It's harderto get tickets for the opening the
night than it is to get aneedle to the eye of a camel.
Now, what's so hard about gettinga needles to the eye of a cannon?
There's no eye in Campbell. Don'tyou get it, Molly, I
(02:44):
says, I ain't funny, Meggie. Oh well, it's educational, as
I always says, Molly, yougot wha jor ho journey? Hello there,
old timer? Do you have anice Christmas chore? Did care to
buy an eye Christmas tree? Now? What would we be doing with the
Christmas tree at time? Is here? Day? We don't need one,
(03:07):
old timer. Our carpet a sofullof needles. Now we're thinking of running
sleeping quarters to a couple of Hindufakers. That's pretty good, giant,
But that ain't the way I heardit. The way I heard it,
one fella, says Telorfeller. Saysay, what's this sleep here? Everybody's
(03:32):
making such a fuss about, ain'tyou here? Says Tlorfella. That's the
time when a girl who is atBlue Sands there's a chance to get tied
up. Almost didn't make it,Oh say almost forgot. Here's the collar,
mister Wilcox sent over. Oh thecollar? Yeah thanks, Oh just
(03:53):
the second, old timer. Here'sa dime for your trouble. Dime will
split? I lick and call mechappy. No, no, won't take
it? Why not, old timer? I lose fifteen cents on the deal.
Well, how come I've got misterWilcox a quartered it. You wouldn't
(04:15):
give me anything sharp? And youbeat that molly trying to get money out
of hollow on me gets my goatthe way that old tin type is developing
Where I'm ready? Dear, okay, help me on with my tuxedo coat,
(04:38):
will you okay? Now take iteasy? Yeah, I'd had this
coat on since Tath was inaugurated.Oh dear, old dear, Now you've
done at the Is it bad?Molly? It's worse than that. It
split all the way up the back. Well, it's a delic tess.
(04:59):
And man said to the customer,here's a pretty pickle. Now listen here.
It's no time for joking. McGhie. You hurry right over to the
tailor and have him mend your coat. Okay, Molly, and go out
the back doors quick at that.Okay, things always happened when a fellow's
in a bait. Hur O,dad drat that dad rat rattle, Never
(05:28):
send it to fail when a fellow'sin a hurry from Hey, what's that
hanging on Guildersleeve's clothes lines? Quie, it's a full draft evening coat,
tails and everything that Guildersleeve has nevermissed a device sneaked into the yard and
barrow that coat for a couple ofhours. Oh, but of course I'd
never dream of doing such a thing. I hope this gate of his doesn't
(05:51):
squeak quiet McGee, Okay, I'llbe glad. Wow, it feels like
a nice coat. I'll try iton. Hey, it fits me pretty
good. Hey, I know whatI'll do. I'll hang my torn coat
up in its place. There.She'd be all for, don't you,
(06:19):
don't you gilder sleeves. It's justme, Pever McGhee, your neighbor.
What are you doing in my backyardat this time of the night, neighbor?
Why? I was just looking forfor our cat. I thought it
straight in here here fussy pussy,pussy, pussy here pussy. What kind
(06:41):
of a looking cat is it?Oh? Well it's one of them small
tease cats. Yeah, that's kindwith the long orange hair and no tail
hardly. Well, well that's veryinteresting. What do you call it?
Oh? We just call it ama here maa milk? Small the milk?
(07:12):
Uh, that's very good, mcgOr is it here pussy pussy pushyh
here pussy pu pushy, pussy,pussy, pussy pussy pushy. Look here
McGee. I wasn't the one wholost her cat. You can't make me
(07:35):
find it either. I'm going inthe house. Low the milk, good
night. You almost caught me.Then we'll I better get back home now.
I'll put Gildy's coat back when weget home from the bees. Oh,
nobody will ever be the wife.I'm like the bank idea. How
(07:58):
do I look? Oh? Heredid you get that love? Least quality
and cold? Well, it wasn'ttime to get mine fixed, so I
just borrowed this one. Oh it'slike a glove, don't it certainly done?
Especially over the hand. I won'thave to wear my gloves ball and
(08:18):
why gonna get started, Molly,where'd you put the tickets here? They
are stuck in the mirror. Huh. But for the life of the McGhee,
I still can't see why they weresent to us. Don't worry about
those tickets money. All famous criticsget theater tickets on occasions like this here.
Since when were you a famous theatercritic? Why didn't I ever tell
you about the time I was dramaticeditor the old Chicago Blaze thousands? Why
(08:41):
I was so powerful that every timeI wrote a favorable criticism of the show,
it would act as a hypodermic atthe box office? Hypercritical Macgee?
I was not as hypercritical Macgee thecant conniser of cusher that ever commonly called
the cards on current Camera crop candony, cuffing the chromic quality of consic creation
and continually causing course cuties to cryby composing fool and cutting comments, commonly
(09:05):
cracking the conceited complace corny punds byconstantly conking course comedians over the cont with
critical cabbages, candleos, coliplard andcobble stones, and curdling the condensed cream
of common kindness from the common novalconfessions of kanka cakes. So the let's
go to the show, missus Len. Here's a parking space right here,
(11:28):
Molly, right next to the theater. Good thing I got them breaks faced
way. Why didn't you go inthe parking lot? Miggue's more uptown?
You know, didn't you see thattime? Molly? Fuck fifteen cents for
the first hour, twenty five centsfor all evenings, and fifty cents for
(11:48):
going with the Wind. Oh,let's hurry, Maggie, I can hardly
wait to see saven gohare oh howare you doing it again? And mister
McGain, Oh how do you domister Jeffington, maybe he said to those
(12:11):
tickets, I'll find out. Well, I see you're going to be present
when Gone with the Wind opens,Uppy. Oh yes, yes, it's
going to be exclusive. You know. The leaders of the community have been
invited. We got a pair oftickets. Oh all this, No,
(12:35):
Molly, it wasn't her. Whydo you look very franky tonight, Uppy?
All dressed up like missus asters porkplus okay, thank you. And
speaking of hands of miss McGee,your tails are draggon Oh oh yeah,
(13:00):
you know the men are wearing themlonger the year. My goodness too charming
missus mc gee? You think?Oh? I always like that dress.
I believe it's the one I gaveto the rummage Stay love Paul yet,
Dad, I cut it down tosip me in and had enough material lift
over to make a fine pair ofdrinks for me tip room four one for
(13:24):
the home team. Very happy.How do you like the string of pearls
I got Molly for Christmas? Ohthat's a dame. But don't you think
they took better missus McGee, ifyou took them out of the shoes bow
ball? Oh and tell me,my dear, where did you get some
shoes? I must by a pen? Don't like them? For my cook?
(13:50):
I bought them at the baton time? Dad, Your mother waited on
me. There goes the ball again. A nice mother, A nice Oh
oh oh you got me a goodcayn's going Molly, poor old up.
(14:16):
But she hasn't got any more glamourthan a bad cold. Uh sickerts please
huh oh yeah here you are badthe file please okay back, I'm come
on, Molly, the news reallyjust starting. My my is dark in
(14:39):
here, Meg? Yeah they makeit that way, so you can see
the picture better. Just follow me. My oh here we are becoming money.
They're way my h oh, hifella, here's I see smile eh
(15:00):
well, hello there, paper andMolly. Oh hello, mister wing Cot.
They hollow? Were you the unknownfriends who sent us tickets for me
to see why Norfolk? In fact, I didn't pay for my ticket either.
The mad everybody gave me a patha path, yeah, I got
it for my work in building upthe matinee business. Here oh oh,
as missus o'larry's cow said to thelanterns, I know I'm putting my foot
(15:22):
in as foot. How did youbuild up the mat and a business,
mister Wilcox. Well, because everyday more housewives are discovering how simple it
is to put I can beautify floraminoleium with Johnson self polishing broke coats.
Someone might hear, Oh well,well it's not only simple, but it's
(15:48):
labor. Saving Johnson's broke coat,oh Jo's blow coach is giving these ladies
more leisure to enjoy the better thingsof life. I say, more time
to read books, then to aten Matinete thatt the be juicy, Well,
I'll be a censored cognomen. Hey, watch my seat for me,
pibble, I'll be right back,okay, hell hurry back, Hey,
(16:11):
Molly, hand me the peanut riddle. Oh watch the new dream. Okay,
okay, Fire there, my dear, and a good good me to
you fibble pears. Oh hi,boomer is this seed taken yet? It
(16:33):
is all right out down man?Hey? What are you doing with that
parachuse? Woman? Quiet tavadillo?I just cry? How do you do?
Come? Answer? Pardon me,sir? But could I look at
your ticket? Stock boom me yes, sir, ticket stove, ticket stove.
(16:55):
See well I put that ticket stop. Let me see. Here's a
small meat, very handy when youencounter a road hog. Well, here's
the messies that my cousin from austradiophones. It says Melbourne je boomerang,
(17:15):
Yes, indeed, an unstrung disser. I've been playing fast and loose with
the musical Widow. An emergency haircurler for ladies in straightened circumstances. Here's
the second hand second hand would watchits hair. Chaine must have got caught
(17:37):
on my coast leaves or some otherfar fet excuse a little pipe of my
own invention made out of meerschaum witha lead bottom, equally good for smoking
or slugging. Well, well that'sthat no ticket stup. What's more,
I seem to be a check fora beer? Shaw h. Then you
(18:07):
haven't gone a kick a stop?Have it me? Not? My lad
range, I must have picked upthe wrong wall to night? Oh oh
what does that starn? Stay overthere? Run, don't walk to the
nearest exsert chareless advice. I'll takea good night, my dear, gone
paddyway. And that guy crashing inhere, Molly, he's got more brass
(18:34):
than a nine dollars tuba, say, McGee stamps thrumbing around. Hey,
what's that I see under my feet? Now, don't go bothering them,
Molly, that's my shoes, yourshoe. Yeah, they were pinching me
and I took them off. McGee. I'm achined. Oh well, stuff,
what's the fun coming here to seegone with the wind, sitting with
(18:56):
the e light and taking off yourshoes? Nobody on notice that I'm wearing
my black socks. The idea,but those shoes right back on this very
instant of yes you have, I'llput him on. Boy, I can't
get my feet back into him.Sirs, you're right for taking them off
(19:18):
in the furt place. Oh Ican't get him on, Molly. Oh
huh, forget you're trying to puton my shoes. Let's leave our shoes
off. Molly. Here comes Gonewith the Wild, Ladies and gentlemen.
(19:41):
While the audience at the Bagel theateris watching Gone with the Wind, Jimmy
Steals will say, all the thingsyou are, honest stream time that makes
(20:11):
the long, even the breathless,of the dreaming that trembles on the dream
proby you are to love that light, the the dearer thing. D know
(20:41):
what you are, my happy arm, the whole you and all I'll that
(21:02):
moment when all the things you long, my hap long, and so i'le
(21:44):
all that moment, Dion, whenall the things you oh sure sure you
(22:30):
love that act you will take tocolor shops, I take of that wonder.
Oh I never thought, I saidfor a picture that took four hours,
Molly, But this will was sure. What did you like it?
Molly? It was so beautiful.I never enjoyed myself so much any life.
(22:55):
Oh there, now, don't takelong talk. I got a surprise
for you, Molly. I knowthe perfect penny for an evening like,
Oh, you're always so soft shut. Let's get a dish of top sue
doing fool's barbecue? Oh McGee,how can you think of a thing like
that at a time like this.We'll do nothing at the time when we
(23:18):
get Homeye, fixes a couple ofbowls of chili. All you're right,
Molly, that would be more appropriate. Oh McGee. I hate to keep
bringing it up, but who couldhave said? Some nice tickets? And
why don't quit worrying about the tickets? Molly? Here's the car? Oh?
Oh there, little girl? CanI have a right home? Please?
(23:41):
Massy? Can I play sure ofus? Hey? What's the kids
your age doing? Out to leadat night? This? Curfews have wrong?
Three hours ago? M don't youknow what it means when the bell
rings at nine o'clock? Happen curfewring? I guess you don't know what
(24:03):
curfew is, Molly. So ohno you don't, Yes, I go?
No you don't, Yes, Igo. Jumpers, get in the
car, Okay, okay, we'llall get in the front seat. Ip
insist quiet there, standing up forall ours bone rides and getting in the
(24:29):
buddy's hair where you been to thishour? S Di be gone with the
lamb? Oh they ain't that picturea little too old for you? Oh
no, it's plain no, Imean, oh never mind. Oh what
part of tonight's performance did you like? This? This the pip when Missy
Boma was thrown out of the seaon his statue. Oh, I hope
(24:56):
you like the rest of the showtoo. Yeah. Oh well, now,
just what part didn't you like?Mackey mouse? Boy? There wasn't
any Mickey mouse. That's the partI didn't win. Question. All right,
Molly, here we are, Comeon, little girl. Okay,
hey, I don't forget your packageright away. How did you get a
(25:18):
ticket for tonight anyway? Oh?I didn't need Danny. My papa's an
energy of red. Oh your father, Well, why didn't you write home
with him then? Because he tookhim almost a thousand dollars tonight? Wow?
And he's a pay to hold upman, I bet you. Oh
you mean he's carrying all that moneyhome with him. No, I'm carrying
(25:38):
it home with me. So Isit in the house, Molly and get
the old boy. I almost forgotabout returning this coat to gild the police
clothes line. I've been waiting foryou. Uh huh, you'll be on
(26:02):
your mind. You know very wellit was on my mind. You you
whoop and keep clothing. Oh no, that's my coach anyway, when you
came into my backyard tonight looking forthat blasted cat of yours. Wouldn't do
a thing like that, mister Gilder, Oh no, and why not have
any can't every year? Excuse me, folks, I think I hear our
(26:25):
Poe ring say right there, McGee, don't you try to crawl away with
my tails between your legs? Saywhat on earth is keep talking about?
McGee? I haven't said seen thisidea? You have to, I have
not. You sneak into my yardlike a snake and stole my quaala tail
(26:48):
off the line where I was airingit out after New Year's You dinis just
to keep me from going to theopening tonight. Give me my coach,
McGee, right now, Let go, Gilder sleep, give me a chance
on more tricks he do? Giveme. There's the sleeve. You'll bet
you what give me that? There'sthe other guildersleeves. Are you wait a
(27:22):
minute, my friend? You waita minute before I get hot under your
collar. If you give me achance, I'll take the rest of your
coat off myself. There there youare off about the button cup too,
and much obliges you'll hear more ofthis. Ki yea good night missus.
M here pussy, pussy, pussy, Oh boy, what a night.
(27:48):
Three tickets are gone with the windstearing up the gold coat. Now for
a big busting bowl of chili gonein Molly water to night. Now I
know who sent it, sur Whatdo you mean? Look, I've furniture
don gone. Oh now, folks, our furnature wasn't really stolen. As
(28:19):
a matter of fact, we didn'thave any in the first place, but
we did see gone with the windand all. It was wonderful, wasn't
it, Meghinn, Yes, sir, sure was. You know what I
think? Molly why, I'll betif it was handled right, that picture
would make a great book. Goodnight, okay, dog. This is
(28:45):
Harlow Wilcox speaking for the makers ofJohnson's Wax from Johnson's Self Collars and blots
over. We're seeing Wisconsin, lettingyou all to join us again next toesday
night, good night. This afaswho boat Duffin couple of Oh,
The Thompson Whack Program, Win SiverMcGee and Molly milchaelis Johnson's Whack and Johnson
Self Pollocking Low cost Present Marion andJim Jordan. That Fiver mcgeheon Molly with
Jimmy Shields, Bill Thompson and BillyMills orchestra. The show opens with Lonza,
(01:26):
your night is a big night inWest pro Vista or Gone with the
Wind is having its formal opening atthe Biju Theater. The cream of society
will be there. So here intheir living room, getting ready to use
the ticket someone mischievously sent them.We find the underdone bottom of wis for
Vista's Uppercross Fever McGee and Molly.Hey, well, where'd you put that?
(01:53):
Button hooks? Button hook Yeah,button Hooksgie, don't tell me?
Or go to a formal opening wearingthem yellow shoes at the box toes now,
why well, you know I wouldn'tdo no uncouth stuff like that.
There. I want to use itto button my vet. Oh there,
I'll hope. Parlo Wilcox remembers tosend over that size seventeen collar. Megie,
(02:19):
are you sure there was no messagewith those tickets? No? Just
the two tickets in an envelope,but the under the front door. Well,
I hope we can find out whosent him so we can thank him.
Yeah, you bet. It's harderto get tickets for the opening the
night than it is to get aneedle to the eye of a camel.
Now, what's so hard about gettinga needles to the eye of a cannon?
There's no eye in Campbell. Don'tyou get it, Molly, I
(02:44):
says, I ain't funny, Meggie. Oh well, it's educational, as
I always says, Molly, yougot wha jor ho journey? Hello there,
old timer? Do you have anice Christmas chore? Did care to
buy an eye Christmas tree? Now? What would we be doing with the
Christmas tree at time? Is here? Day? We don't need one,
(03:07):
old timer. Our carpet a sofullof needles. Now we're thinking of running
sleeping quarters to a couple of Hindufakers. That's pretty good, giant,
But that ain't the way I heardit. The way I heard it,
one fella, says Telorfeller. Saysay, what's this sleep here? Everybody's
(03:32):
making such a fuss about, ain'tyou here? Says Tlorfella. That's the
time when a girl who is atBlue Sands there's a chance to get tied
up. Almost didn't make it,Oh say almost forgot. Here's the collar,
mister Wilcox sent over. Oh thecollar? Yeah thanks, Oh just
(03:53):
the second, old timer. Here'sa dime for your trouble. Dime will
split? I lick and call mechappy. No, no, won't take
it? Why not, old timer? I lose fifteen cents on the deal.
Well, how come I've got misterWilcox a quartered it. You wouldn't
(04:15):
give me anything sharp? And youbeat that molly trying to get money out
of hollow on me gets my goatthe way that old tin type is developing
Where I'm ready? Dear, okay, help me on with my tuxedo coat,
(04:38):
will you okay? Now take iteasy? Yeah, I'd had this
coat on since Tath was inaugurated.Oh dear, old dear, Now you've
done at the Is it bad?Molly? It's worse than that. It
split all the way up the back. Well, it's a delic tess.
(04:59):
And man said to the customer,here's a pretty pickle. Now listen here.
It's no time for joking. McGhie. You hurry right over to the
tailor and have him mend your coat. Okay, Molly, and go out
the back doors quick at that.Okay, things always happened when a fellow's
in a bait. Hur O,dad drat that dad rat rattle, Never
(05:28):
send it to fail when a fellow'sin a hurry from Hey, what's that
hanging on Guildersleeve's clothes lines? Quie, it's a full draft evening coat,
tails and everything that Guildersleeve has nevermissed a device sneaked into the yard and
barrow that coat for a couple ofhours. Oh, but of course I'd
never dream of doing such a thing. I hope this gate of his doesn't
(05:51):
squeak quiet McGee, Okay, I'llbe glad. Wow, it feels like
a nice coat. I'll try iton. Hey, it fits me pretty
good. Hey, I know whatI'll do. I'll hang my torn coat
up in its place. There.She'd be all for, don't you,
(06:19):
don't you gilder sleeves. It's justme, Pever McGhee, your neighbor.
What are you doing in my backyardat this time of the night, neighbor?
Why? I was just looking forfor our cat. I thought it
straight in here here fussy pussy,pussy, pussy here pussy. What kind
(06:41):
of a looking cat is it?Oh? Well it's one of them small
tease cats. Yeah, that's kindwith the long orange hair and no tail
hardly. Well, well that's veryinteresting. What do you call it?
Oh? We just call it ama here maa milk? Small the milk?
(07:12):
Uh, that's very good, mcgOr is it here pussy pussy pushyh
here pussy pu pushy, pussy,pussy, pussy pussy pushy. Look here
McGee. I wasn't the one wholost her cat. You can't make me
(07:35):
find it either. I'm going inthe house. Low the milk, good
night. You almost caught me.Then we'll I better get back home now.
I'll put Gildy's coat back when weget home from the bees. Oh,
nobody will ever be the wife.I'm like the bank idea. How
(07:58):
do I look? Oh? Heredid you get that love? Least quality
and cold? Well, it wasn'ttime to get mine fixed, so I
just borrowed this one. Oh it'slike a glove, don't it certainly done?
Especially over the hand. I won'thave to wear my gloves ball and
(08:18):
why gonna get started, Molly,where'd you put the tickets here? They
are stuck in the mirror. Huh. But for the life of the McGhee,
I still can't see why they weresent to us. Don't worry about
those tickets money. All famous criticsget theater tickets on occasions like this here.
Since when were you a famous theatercritic? Why didn't I ever tell
you about the time I was dramaticeditor the old Chicago Blaze thousands? Why
(08:41):
I was so powerful that every timeI wrote a favorable criticism of the show,
it would act as a hypodermic atthe box office? Hypercritical Macgee?
I was not as hypercritical Macgee thecant conniser of cusher that ever commonly called
the cards on current Camera crop candony, cuffing the chromic quality of consic creation
and continually causing course cuties to cryby composing fool and cutting comments, commonly
(09:05):
cracking the conceited complace corny punds byconstantly conking course comedians over the cont with
critical cabbages, candleos, coliplard andcobble stones, and curdling the condensed cream
of common kindness from the common novalconfessions of kanka cakes. So the let's
go to the show, missus Len. Here's a parking space right here,
(11:28):
Molly, right next to the theater. Good thing I got them breaks faced
way. Why didn't you go inthe parking lot? Miggue's more uptown?
You know, didn't you see thattime? Molly? Fuck fifteen cents for
the first hour, twenty five centsfor all evenings, and fifty cents for
(11:48):
going with the Wind. Oh,let's hurry, Maggie, I can hardly
wait to see saven gohare oh howare you doing it again? And mister
McGain, Oh how do you domister Jeffington, maybe he said to those
(12:11):
tickets, I'll find out. Well, I see you're going to be present
when Gone with the Wind opens,Uppy. Oh yes, yes, it's
going to be exclusive. You know. The leaders of the community have been
invited. We got a pair oftickets. Oh all this, No,
(12:35):
Molly, it wasn't her. Whydo you look very franky tonight, Uppy?
All dressed up like missus asters porkplus okay, thank you. And
speaking of hands of miss McGee,your tails are draggon Oh oh yeah,
(13:00):
you know the men are wearing themlonger the year. My goodness too charming
missus mc gee? You think?Oh? I always like that dress.
I believe it's the one I gaveto the rummage Stay love Paul yet,
Dad, I cut it down tosip me in and had enough material lift
over to make a fine pair ofdrinks for me tip room four one for
(13:24):
the home team. Very happy.How do you like the string of pearls
I got Molly for Christmas? Ohthat's a dame. But don't you think
they took better missus McGee, ifyou took them out of the shoes bow
ball? Oh and tell me,my dear, where did you get some
shoes? I must by a pen? Don't like them? For my cook?
(13:50):
I bought them at the baton time? Dad, Your mother waited on
me. There goes the ball again. A nice mother, A nice Oh
oh oh you got me a goodcayn's going Molly, poor old up.
(14:16):
But she hasn't got any more glamourthan a bad cold. Uh sickerts please
huh oh yeah here you are badthe file please okay back, I'm come
on, Molly, the news reallyjust starting. My my is dark in
(14:39):
here, Meg? Yeah they makeit that way, so you can see
the picture better. Just follow me. My oh here we are becoming money.
They're way my h oh, hifella, here's I see smile eh
(15:00):
well, hello there, paper andMolly. Oh hello, mister wing Cot.
They hollow? Were you the unknownfriends who sent us tickets for me
to see why Norfolk? In fact, I didn't pay for my ticket either.
The mad everybody gave me a patha path, yeah, I got
it for my work in building upthe matinee business. Here oh oh,
as missus o'larry's cow said to thelanterns, I know I'm putting my foot
(15:22):
in as foot. How did youbuild up the mat and a business,
mister Wilcox. Well, because everyday more housewives are discovering how simple it
is to put I can beautify floraminoleium with Johnson self polishing broke coats.
Someone might hear, Oh well,well it's not only simple, but it's
(15:48):
labor. Saving Johnson's broke coat,oh Jo's blow coach is giving these ladies
more leisure to enjoy the better thingsof life. I say, more time
to read books, then to aten Matinete thatt the be juicy, Well,
I'll be a censored cognomen. Hey, watch my seat for me,
pibble, I'll be right back,okay, hell hurry back, Hey,
(16:11):
Molly, hand me the peanut riddle. Oh watch the new dream. Okay,
okay, Fire there, my dear, and a good good me to
you fibble pears. Oh hi,boomer is this seed taken yet? It
(16:33):
is all right out down man?Hey? What are you doing with that
parachuse? Woman? Quiet tavadillo?I just cry? How do you do?
Come? Answer? Pardon me,sir? But could I look at
your ticket? Stock boom me yes, sir, ticket stove, ticket stove.
(16:55):
See well I put that ticket stop. Let me see. Here's a
small meat, very handy when youencounter a road hog. Well, here's
the messies that my cousin from austradiophones. It says Melbourne je boomerang,
(17:15):
Yes, indeed, an unstrung disser. I've been playing fast and loose with
the musical Widow. An emergency haircurler for ladies in straightened circumstances. Here's
the second hand second hand would watchits hair. Chaine must have got caught
(17:37):
on my coast leaves or some otherfar fet excuse a little pipe of my
own invention made out of meerschaum witha lead bottom, equally good for smoking
or slugging. Well, well that'sthat no ticket stup. What's more,
I seem to be a check fora beer? Shaw h. Then you
(18:07):
haven't gone a kick a stop?Have it me? Not? My lad
range, I must have picked upthe wrong wall to night? Oh oh
what does that starn? Stay overthere? Run, don't walk to the
nearest exsert chareless advice. I'll takea good night, my dear, gone
paddyway. And that guy crashing inhere, Molly, he's got more brass
(18:34):
than a nine dollars tuba, say, McGee stamps thrumbing around. Hey,
what's that I see under my feet? Now, don't go bothering them,
Molly, that's my shoes, yourshoe. Yeah, they were pinching me
and I took them off. McGee. I'm achined. Oh well, stuff,
what's the fun coming here to seegone with the wind, sitting with
(18:56):
the e light and taking off yourshoes? Nobody on notice that I'm wearing
my black socks. The idea,but those shoes right back on this very
instant of yes you have, I'llput him on. Boy, I can't
get my feet back into him.Sirs, you're right for taking them off
(19:18):
in the furt place. Oh Ican't get him on, Molly. Oh
huh, forget you're trying to puton my shoes. Let's leave our shoes
off. Molly. Here comes Gonewith the Wild, Ladies and gentlemen.
(19:41):
While the audience at the Bagel theateris watching Gone with the Wind, Jimmy
Steals will say, all the thingsyou are, honest stream time that makes
(20:11):
the long, even the breathless,of the dreaming that trembles on the dream
proby you are to love that light, the the dearer thing. D know
(20:41):
what you are, my happy arm, the whole you and all I'll that
(21:02):
moment when all the things you long, my hap long, and so i'le
(21:44):
all that moment, Dion, whenall the things you oh sure sure you
(22:30):
love that act you will take tocolor shops, I take of that wonder.
Oh I never thought, I saidfor a picture that took four hours,
Molly, But this will was sure. What did you like it?
Molly? It was so beautiful.I never enjoyed myself so much any life.
(22:55):
Oh there, now, don't takelong talk. I got a surprise
for you, Molly. I knowthe perfect penny for an evening like,
Oh, you're always so soft shut. Let's get a dish of top sue
doing fool's barbecue? Oh McGee,how can you think of a thing like
that at a time like this.We'll do nothing at the time when we
(23:18):
get Homeye, fixes a couple ofbowls of chili. All you're right,
Molly, that would be more appropriate. Oh McGee. I hate to keep
bringing it up, but who couldhave said? Some nice tickets? And
why don't quit worrying about the tickets? Molly? Here's the car? Oh?
Oh there, little girl? CanI have a right home? Please?
(23:41):
Massy? Can I play sure ofus? Hey? What's the kids
your age doing? Out to leadat night? This? Curfews have wrong?
Three hours ago? M don't youknow what it means when the bell
rings at nine o'clock? Happen curfewring? I guess you don't know what
(24:03):
curfew is, Molly. So ohno you don't, Yes, I go?
No you don't, Yes, Igo. Jumpers, get in the
car, Okay, okay, we'llall get in the front seat. Ip
insist quiet there, standing up forall ours bone rides and getting in the
(24:29):
buddy's hair where you been to thishour? S Di be gone with the
lamb? Oh they ain't that picturea little too old for you? Oh
no, it's plain no, Imean, oh never mind. Oh what
part of tonight's performance did you like? This? This the pip when Missy
Boma was thrown out of the seaon his statue. Oh, I hope
(24:56):
you like the rest of the showtoo. Yeah. Oh well, now,
just what part didn't you like?Mackey mouse? Boy? There wasn't
any Mickey mouse. That's the partI didn't win. Question. All right,
Molly, here we are, Comeon, little girl. Okay,
hey, I don't forget your packageright away. How did you get a
(25:18):
ticket for tonight anyway? Oh?I didn't need Danny. My papa's an
energy of red. Oh your father, Well, why didn't you write home
with him then? Because he tookhim almost a thousand dollars tonight? Wow?
And he's a pay to hold upman, I bet you. Oh
you mean he's carrying all that moneyhome with him. No, I'm carrying
(25:38):
it home with me. So Isit in the house, Molly and get
the old boy. I almost forgotabout returning this coat to gild the police
clothes line. I've been waiting foryou. Uh huh, you'll be on
(26:02):
your mind. You know very wellit was on my mind. You you
whoop and keep clothing. Oh no, that's my coach anyway, when you
came into my backyard tonight looking forthat blasted cat of yours. Wouldn't do
a thing like that, mister Gilder, Oh no, and why not have
any can't every year? Excuse me, folks, I think I hear our
(26:25):
Poe ring say right there, McGee, don't you try to crawl away with
my tails between your legs? Saywhat on earth is keep talking about?
McGee? I haven't said seen thisidea? You have to, I have
not. You sneak into my yardlike a snake and stole my quaala tail
(26:48):
off the line where I was airingit out after New Year's You dinis just
to keep me from going to theopening tonight. Give me my coach,
McGee, right now, Let go, Gilder sleep, give me a chance
on more tricks he do? Giveme. There's the sleeve. You'll bet
you what give me that? There'sthe other guildersleeves. Are you wait a
(27:22):
minute, my friend? You waita minute before I get hot under your
collar. If you give me achance, I'll take the rest of your
coat off myself. There there youare off about the button cup too,
and much obliges you'll hear more ofthis. Ki yea good night missus.
M here pussy, pussy, pussy, Oh boy, what a night.
(27:48):
Three tickets are gone with the windstearing up the gold coat. Now for
a big busting bowl of chili gonein Molly water to night. Now I
know who sent it, sur Whatdo you mean? Look, I've furniture
don gone. Oh now, folks, our furnature wasn't really stolen. As
(28:19):
a matter of fact, we didn'thave any in the first place, but
we did see gone with the windand all. It was wonderful, wasn't
it, Meghinn, Yes, sir, sure was. You know what I
think? Molly why, I'll betif it was handled right, that picture
would make a great book. Goodnight, okay, dog. This is
(28:45):
Harlow Wilcox speaking for the makers ofJohnson's Wax from Johnson's Self Collars and blots
over. We're seeing Wisconsin, lettingyou all to join us again next toesday
night, good night. This afaswho boat Duffin couple of Oh,
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