Rest

Today, we discuss how important it is to rest.

Episode Transcript

(00:02):
This is a Bramble Jam podcast.Sleep is a big indicator of how you're
doing internally. Now, I'm notsaying if you have a bad dream or
you can't sleep well one night,but I'm talking about if you can't get
good, healthy sleep more than sixhours on a regular basis, there's there's

(00:23):
something internally wrong going on that youneed to check out. What's up,
Dad's Welcome to another episode of OurDad's Diary. I am Johnathan Parker.
You're bald, bearded and beautiful host, and we're doing something a little different,

(00:47):
a little different, a little different. You just heard another voice.
Oh boy, another voice. That'sright, that voice. Identify yourself.
This is Jonathan Parker. You're vaultWait no, no, no, no,
it's because you've heard my voice toomany times, that's what it is.
You're so you're so used to theintro. I am, I am.
It's good. It's a good intro. Thankfully, I'm not completely bald
yet. I've got some receding hairliners and definitely not bald. No,

(01:12):
this is Nathan Robinson. I getto hang out with Jonathan and produce or
help produce. We've got a coupleof other team members that do it fantastic
job to take these conversations about dadlife and get them out through the interwebs
into your ears. But I geta chance to help produce Our Dad's Sire
and I'm excited to hang out alittle bit with Jonathan. Yeah. You

(01:34):
know. One of the things we'restepping into in twenty twenty one is the
podcast is called Our Dad's Diary,and we interview a lot of dads and
that's really awesome, and we hearsome amazing stories. But as people have
pointed out to me, I don'tsay a lot. I mean, I
give the stories at the end.But people have said, well, you
don't leave diary entry for your boyslike you used to do on the Our

(01:57):
Dad's Diary video series. If youdon't know about this, you can go
to YouTube and Our Dad's Diary.There's a video series close to one hundred
videos that we did which are prettyincredible. Nathan was a part of those
as well. So every several episodes, I'm not about I'm not ready to
commit to the amount. Sure,I'm going to be very uncommittable every so
often. This is going to bemore of a diary entry that I'm leaving

(02:23):
to my boy something that I thinkis important, something that I think needs
to be talked about, that Iknow will offer value to other dads,
give other dads and moms and parentsstuff to think about, because it's going
to be about what I believe isimportant that I think my kids should be
important, which, obviously, ifI believe my kids should think it's important,
I think you should think it's important. And again, I want to

(02:45):
be clear, I'm not saying I'man expert and everything we're talking about.
You know, I'm a I'm aguide on the side of your life.
Okay, That's what it is.If you're listening this right now, I'm
just a guide on the side whohas experiences and examples of dad life and
things that I've come to believe thatare important, then I want to share.
And if you don't like that,you can stop listening right now,
because this is also for my boysand I want them to listen to it

(03:06):
right and outside of my wife,Nathan's heard my voice more than anybody else
in the entire world. Almost certainly. Yes, I mean, if I
was still living in Connecticut with mymother, my mom might have given you
a run for your money. Butright now, at this point, not
at this point, which mom,I should call more, call your mother
everything, Call your mother. That'sgood dad advice right there. So Nathan's

(03:30):
gonna just join and and sit andchat and offer thoughts as he he can't
because you just heard his podcast.You just heard his Our Dad's Diary podcast.
You know he's got he's got girls, I got boys. Um,
we've been doing this for a longtime. So we're just going. We've
got you beat. We're at four, you're you're just at three. S.
Everything gotta be a competition. Andyou know, I got the snippy

(03:52):
snip, so it's not it's notlike I can like pick back up.
But as you know, but they'refour beautiful girls. Hey, when you
were cleaning the house, did yousee did you go up to the room
and see the picture of Christmas card? No? I remember? You want
to tell that story? Yeah?Yeah. So the Robinson family, very

(04:13):
much like the Parker family has thoughtabout doing for seven years, have never
done. Is they send really adorableChristmas cards and other people do as well,
and we're very thankful for him.But my boys latched on to the
Robinson girls and it's they have thelittle kitchen set, a little plastic kitchen
set, and the picture is justright there, and then they argue about
who gets to carry it around.Oh man, that's so great. It's

(04:33):
such a great story, such agreat story. And for what it's worth,
the only reason our Christmas card iscute is because Susannah and I do
not feature heavily in it. It'sall about all about the babies. Well,
that's what Christmas card should be.That's right now. The other things
Christmas card shouldn't be This isn't ourtopic for today. But let me just
it's gonna be pets. We don'tknow. I'm okay with pets. I
get the pet thing. I kindof get the pet things. What I

(04:55):
don't need is a novel. Okay, fair enough? Well, some people
send the picture was update? NoLike who came up with this idea that
mid December is the time to updateeverybody on your mailing not your email,
your mailing list about your life?Now? I'm okay with a little like
update on the card? Right,sure, but don't send me, yeah,

(05:16):
a novel? Why did Jacks thissophomore don't care? You don't know
why I don't care, because ifI did care, I would have asked
you or you would know already Iwould already. And it's just it's now
if you do this, I'm notcasting judgment on you. I'm just saying
this is will you please? Themost controversial episode it could be. Will
you please just send me a letter? Um uh and let me know why

(05:40):
you feel compellitive? And now Iget it now if you're like why,
I send it to my mother andmy my family and could okay, good
call them more like that's all thatneeds to be h just it just don't
send. But the Christma cards arebeautiful. That was a hot take.
That was hot. Yeah, drivesme nuts. Jessica also comments that it's
the only time during the year Ilet her put stuff on the fridge.
Oh, interest, because I likemy fridge clean. Yeah you're that guy.

(06:03):
I am that guy. Now.Now, some people have fridges and
they're not clean, but they're likeorganized, like that makes sense, Like,
gad, that's fine. But thisall started because the boys started pulling
stuff off the fridge and then itwould end up broken or everywhere. Okay,
so it's like nothing on the fridge. It's not on the fridge,
but I literally, I let herI approve and don't take down when I

(06:23):
get up earlier than her. TheChristmas picture cards. So on my fridge
at any currently on my fridge halfof it, well like the lower half,
as high as my three year oldcan reach. There's random just like
cut out pieces of paper and randomshapes scotch taped to the fridge. Not
even man scotch tape. Scotch tape. It's a good thing. There's gooby

(06:46):
gun, right, and I lookat that. Not I'm like it.
There are other battles for me,yeah, for our household. So I
just feel like I I there's nobattles because I have just that this will
not be something we fight about.The fridge will stay clean, fair enough,
all right, what are we talkingabout today? Yeah, that's a
great question, you know, Parkerman, When when I think about the journey

(07:10):
that I've been on and Dad's Iknow you're going to resonate with this.
I've been on a journey to reestablish what it means to have a healthy
rest pattern. Now, I wantto be clear about this. There's there's
two ways I'm going to talk aboutrest right. One is just sleep.
Okay, we're gonna talk about justthe idea that you need to sleep,
and I'll share a little bit ofmy story there. But the other idea
is that you have to do RESTfulthings, things that bring you into a

(07:33):
space of rest. You know.So between the ages of well, probably
earlier, but definitely between thirty andthirty three, I was only sleeping four
to five hours a night, fiveor six hours or five or six days
a week because what I was doingwas I had a full time job,

(07:57):
which we all know is not aneight hour job. Right. So if
you work in a trade, aditionalconventional job, corporate America, organization,
church, not for profit, right, they say it's a forty hour week,
we all know it's a lie.It's not true. It's you know,
it's more fifty sixty hours a week. And then you know, I
had kids, and then I wasstarting a bunch of these side projects,
right, Well, when do youwork on side projects? Well, you

(08:18):
work and then you do the dinnerthing, and you do the sport karate
thing, swimming lesson thing, andthen you do bedtime thing, then you
hang out with your spouse thing.You know, it's about ten o'clock before
you can start the side hustle work. Well, then I would work ten
to twelve, ten to one.But then I was getting up at five
o'clock every morning. And I reallybelieve that between thirty and thirty two thirty

(08:45):
three I averaged I mean, ifyou averaged out probably five hours sleep at
night. And here's the thing.You know, so I'm a follower of
Jesus. So I read the Bibleand that might not be your thing,
and that's okay, but there isa there's a verse that definitely hands out
and the verse says it is unwise, it is foolish to stay up late

(09:05):
to wake up early. They understand, like I knew that that verse was
in there. I just thought Iwas the exception to it, right,
right, of course, don't debt. We do that. I mean,
dads do that, right. Wefeel like we're the exception to every role.
And I thought, oh, yeah, that's good for every other eight
billion person in the world, justnot for me. I can stay up

(09:26):
late to wake up early so thatI can accomplish my goal. And here's
the deal. My wife sent mean article that says if you get if
you habitually get less than six hoursof sleep, your brain starts operating as
if it was intoxicated. Right,so you're driving around you yourself, but
also your kids, your wife,your whole life in that minivan. Yeah,

(09:48):
as if you were in toxic as. I was intoxicated and I burned
out. I crashed, I meanI crashed bad. Now. I also
had massive insecurities, which we'll getto the RESTful things here in a minute.
Master insecurity. So I didn't askfor help. So Dad's right now,
if you need to ask for help, you need to find a friend
and ask for help, or youneed to go to your spouse, where
your girlfriend, where your partner andjust say hey, I need help because

(10:09):
I'm crashing. Right because we knowsuicide rates are up right now, we
just know this. This is justfact. Okay, this is just fact.
But I was reading in a bookrecently and a psychologist said the first
thing he talks to patients about istheir rest, their sleep, how much
they're sleeping. And he changed.He says, the first thing we work
on is can I get them tohave more sleep? Because sleep is this

(10:31):
huge indicator Dad's and Titus Judah Zionhear your dad, sleep is a big
indicator of how you're doing internally.Now, I'm not saying if you have
a bad dream or you can't sleepwell one night, but I'm talking about
if you can't get good, healthysleep more than six hours. Yeah,
I'm putting a condition on it.More than six hours on a regular basis,

(10:54):
there's there's something internally wrong going onthat you need to check out.
I like you, you know,I'm a serial night owl, right.
That's that wasn't just my thirty tothirty three years old. That was as
long as I can remember. OnceI had control over my bedtime, so
call it college, junior, higherhigh school, when you know, when

(11:15):
I had homework to do and thingsto do and the rest of the family
went to bed. Like I mean, I was always like I was averaging
that five to six, maybe fiveto seven on a good night average from
like my teenage years through thirty fourthirty five. And it is only recently

(11:35):
that And I don't know if it'sbecause literally I have four kids, four
kids, or literally because it's youknow, thirty five, I'll be thirty
six this year to where like thebiology caught up with me and said no,
no, no, no, nono, this has never been healthy.
But at this point it's literally impossible. I need to stop where I've

(11:56):
I've finally sort of started to establishmore routine of getting you know, going
to bed and being in bed byten pm like that suit for me,
that's insanely early, and then gettingup at six and getting we can call
oh this is oh? Is thiswhat the rest of you feel like?
Like? Do you feel good whenyou get this? Much? Like?
Alli? Well, and that's thething that's We've also bought into a huge

(12:20):
lie. Okay, we bought intoa hugely And then here are the two
huge lines. You can't multitask.Research has proven this. Okay, you
can only do one thing well atone time. If you're trying to do
two or three things at one time, you are not doing them well.
You are subdividing what you could befocused on, and you're doing them more
poorly. The other thing research hasshown is if you get less sleep,

(12:41):
you are less productive, so youmight only get listen. I'm speaking from
experience here, Okay, I'm nottelling you I'm an expert on sleep studies
and how all of that works.I'm telling you from experience, you can
only get three hours of sleep,but that first two hours of work.
Come on, you know it.That first two hours of work is terrible.
You gotta get so jacked up oncaffeine. Right. Your body's fighting

(13:03):
to go to sleep because your bodyknows what it's body, what the body
needs, and it's not good.But you have this weird thing. We
listen, I had this weird thing, and I know some of you can
empathize. I had this with it. I pat myself on the back because
I told people I got up earlierthan them. But at the end of
the day they want more productive sleeping. Then I was productive awake, right,
you know, I like. Sowe talked a little bit about the

(13:26):
early our Dad's diary episodes, right, okay, classics. There's you might
remember this one. There's one whereyou're in your kitchen so your wife painted
this beautiful mural and you're and you'restill there. Yeah, um, you
know these bricks and whatnot. SoI know exactly where you were because I've
seen that in your house. Soit's I mean, it's oh, dark
thirty. I don't know how earlyit is, but you're you know,

(13:50):
you're giving this diary so tightest youdesign like you hopefully have heard that message
now you're hearing this one when Iwent to edit that video where you're talking
about get you know, winners getup a hustle and yeah, oh gosh,
you gotta get up early, youknow, make your dreams come true.

(14:11):
And like, you know, holdingthis camera in front of your face,
like looking at your eyes like thesepuffy eyes and this like this jankie
lighting. Oh man. I waslike, oh, it's not a good
look. We should find that andsee if we can find the audio and
put the audio like right here.Yeah. I enjoy getting up early.
It took a long time to getused to it. I do remember that.

(14:33):
Yeah, and I think I madethat video because I was so tired.
I had to encourage myself. Yeah, which I was wrong. Right,
Should you get up early? Yeah, if you go to bed early?
Right, listen say that again.Yeah, if you want to get
up early, go to bed early. I get up. I get up
between five and five thirty every day. I go to bed between ten and
and thirty every day. That's whatI do. And here's the deal.

(14:56):
That's just wise. You know,some people talk about, you know,
we grew up in Christian circles,right, and they'll talk about how pastors
got up to prey, got upat two am to pray. Well,
it's because they didn't have electricity.Oh okay, I see. Oh you
mean like way back way back inthe day, right before times Edison,

(15:18):
right way back in the day.Well, so if the sun went down
at five, they were in bed, So get up at two. That
was not so hard. That wasnot hard. They got eight hours in,
yeah, seven eight hours in theygot to pray. This was not
something we should just put on.We shouldn't. A religious institution should not
put this standard ound. But here'sthe thing, guys. Listen, there's

(15:39):
a book out called Margin. Okay, it's absolutely amazing. It was written
in the late eighties. You needto read it. Our current culture,
not just religious, I'm talking aboutour current culture. We have the technology
in our disposal that was supposed tofree up margin, which is considered the
space between our load and our limits. Right, you can carry verse how

(16:00):
much you can carry. And thepoint was that we should be more RESTful
now because of technology. But weknow that's not true. Right, We're
not sleeping as much as we shouldbe. We are not as healthy as
we should be. Anxiety depression,suicide is on the rise, and multiple,
multiple outlets will tell you that thefirst thing we have to look at
is sleep. Dads, you haveto sleep. We're gonna keep this conversation

(16:23):
going about dad life, but we'regonna take a quick break. We'll be
right now. Listen. Some ofyou work third shift. Some of the
moms listening work third shift. Okay, I get that, and you probably

(16:45):
go home in life is crazy andit's difficult, and your kids want your
attention and to give them your attention. But one of the best things you
can do for your kids is restand get some sleep. Because we all
know you're not as good tightest youdesign. You will not be as good
of a of a of a parent, of a spouse, of a friend

(17:06):
if you are not getting sleep.So when we start talking about rest,
I'm talking about at the basic level, getting sleep. Yeah. And then
there are some days you just needto shut the alarm off and just let
your body dictate when you wake upor you or in our case, or
when the kids come in and runYeah, right, when the kids run

(17:27):
in and wake you up. Butyou need you need to rest, You
need you need to sleep. Cool. So what are some of the things
I know you've got um this kindof free form conversation, but what are
some of the items you wanted toreally zero in on, some of the
strategies or techniques that have been helpfulfor you that you have kind of been
thinking about. Yeah, and that, and that moves into that second part

(17:48):
of rest. Right, so yougot to do RESTful things. Here's the
thing I think most people do.Right. They wake up in the morning
and they do two or three ofthe most stress full things that they possibly
could do to themselves every day.One they check their email or social media
accounts right away. Can we justsay, universally, this is a universal
truth, that is a dumb idea. Don't do it. Don't do it.

(18:12):
I mean, I don't sleep withmy phone next to me anymore.
My phone is is downstairs, soI'm in my bedroom my bathroom anymore because
I was in the habit of checkingit. Yeah, you just you just
check it. And here's the comeon, You ain't looking for the good
news of the day. You're lookingyou're checking the news, you're checking your

(18:32):
social media, and then you're gonnawaste ten fifteen minutes looking at it.
And we know this, okay,And if you don't believe me. Netflix
came out the special social Media SocialDilemma, sol dilemma. Right, they've
done the research, right that thatreleases a hormone in your brain at the
start of the day that actually causesdepression, not gives you the energy that
you need. Okay, so gowatch that documentary Tyssue Design. It will

(18:53):
still be around, I'm sure.But then again, I thought Blockbuster would
be around forever. M you knowblock Blockbuster almost Um, this is not
news ever many people know this.But Blockbuster had the chance to acquire Netflix.
They turned it down like a song. Yeah, they're like, nah,
Whole Foods had the opportunity to buyAmazon. How the turntables, How

(19:18):
the turntables have turned turned Yeah?Can you imagine imagine that CEO right now?
Okay, anyway, he's fine bagthis. Yeah, he's doing just
dandy. Uh So, here's thething you shouldn't check your phone. That
should be universal. But here here'ssome of the things. Oh yeah,
the other thing we do to ourbodies, most of us these. This
is me. I also exercise inthe morning, which means I'm breaking down

(19:40):
muscle, I'm stressing out bone.Um, so we we emotionally, and
we emotionally and mentally stress ourselves outby checking social media and checking our phones,
and then we physically stress ourselves outby exercise, because most people exercise
in the morning, okay, Andthen most people who say well I'm an
extraised later in the day, Inever really do. So wait, Paul,

(20:03):
and I know you're building to apoint, but um, for you,
has that not been has that morningexercise time not been up a way
to recharge and be a healthy versionof yourself throughout the day or what's the
what's that tensional? Yeah? Soit has, but I've shifted it back
farther. Okay, So it's notI used to get up, like get
up, change, go to thecar, go to the gym, or

(20:26):
get downstairs. But you're not You'renot fully president enough. Okay. And
and here's the thing. For someof you who are listening, you're like,
no, no, no, Iam I am am. I said,
maybe, sure, your mileage mayvary. Yeah, maybe, so
I'm not I'm not here to arguethis point. But I think creating RESTful
behaviors is important. So when Iwake up in the morning, I want

(20:48):
to do things that create a RESTfulspace, not an anxious, energy filled
pushing space. Okay. Interesting.So you know, for me, my
morning routine is pretty locked in,and a couple things in morning routine has
that tites stew design. You're goingto start practicing and you already know.

(21:10):
You already know it because you you'llinterrupt me and I'll hear you're talking about
it. But it's stuff that we'regoing to introduce you to. But dads,
these are things I think you needto think about. We do deep
breathing exercises. I do deep breathingevery days. There's studies that show that
we go most of us are oxygendeprived. We have enough oxygen to live,

(21:30):
but we need to get oxygen morein our blood. So when doing
these deep breathing exercises, you're floodingyour buddy with oxygen. You're helping your
organs, but you're also having tofocus on something so intentionally because you can't
deep You can't be in the middleof deep breathing and thinking about your taxes,
like because you're just breathing it inand then I meditate and I follow

(21:55):
apps for this. There's some goodapps, but you don't even need an
app if you just could find asilent spot, I would recommend starting at
four minutes, a silent place whereyou can close your eyes, focus on
your breath, focus on a thoughtsomething like I am calm, or I
am at peace, or I amcentered or I am loved, some positive

(22:15):
mantra that you can repeat that allowsyour body just to focus on that one
thing. I'm telling you, Dad'sif you would focus on your breathing and
on some quiet, silent meditation,your life would start changing around. These
things will keep you at rest asyou move into the day. So after
I do those things, or acombination of those things, you know,

(22:37):
then that's when I'll exercise. Butmy focus on exercise, Now, here's
what I've decided. I'm not goingto be a bodybuilder. Shocking, okay.
And here's the thing. Here's thething. This is not a thing
on CrossFit or on what's it calledthe beast mode or any of these other
things. But here's just what I'vedecided. I would rather be flexible and

(23:00):
not sore then being able to liftthree hundred and fifty pounds and be ridiculously
sore all the time. Now,someone's gonna tell me, no, Jonathan
you're saying you don't get a sore. Nope, you're not doing it right.
At fifty years old, I'm goingto be sore if I live three
hundred fifty pounds on my head.Okay. So like I've embraced yoga and
pilates and resistance training and cardio becausewhat I want to do is I want

(23:23):
to improve my life. And Ithink these are the RESTful habits. Okay.
So if I can reduce so restat its base form, sleep,
RESTful habits, if I can breakit down to its base form, are
things that cause you to be atrest in a chaos world. So like
in the Taoists, right in theYing and the Yang, one side is

(23:47):
order, the other side's chaos.But then like on the and then the
white side represents order, and onthe black side represents chaos. And then
on each one of those are thosetwo dots of the other colors, which
represent the fact that at any pointchaos can come in the midst of order,
and order can come in the midstof chaos. I have come to
believe that your ability to rest holistically, whether in order at chaos, is

(24:12):
an indication of your ability to makeit through the world. So Dad's here's
the thing. If you blow upat the first thing that goes wrong,
yeah, you're not at rest becauseyou've allowed an external circumstance dictate how you
perceive and live in the world.Or if you are always at chaos,

(24:36):
chaos is all around you because Idon't know your story, chaos is all
around you. That one circle inthe middle of your chaos is rest.
That you are able to establish orderfor your life. So rest in doing
habitual, RESTful things that keep youcentered. Some people would call it.
Some people would call it, youknow, just keeping you balanced, which

(24:57):
wouldn't be my phrase, but maybethat reson to you. But it would
keep you at rest, meaning youhave internal stillness even if the world around
you is falling apart, but youhave internal stillness even if the world is
celebrating you. That you are juststable, and stability starts with rest,

(25:17):
whether that's sleep or habitual routines.So types to design. I hope,
I hope I'm modeling this for youat least now. I hope when you
look at my life and you interruptme while I'm doing my breathing, I'm
doing my meditation, and you know, I ignore you, which is difficult,
but I do it. I hopeyou realize that your dad views this

(25:38):
as valuable because I want to bethe best I want to be able to
be in the best position to bethe best dad I can be for you
and Dad's here's the thing. Unlesswe take care of ourselves, specifically in
the area of rest, we won'tbe the best dad we can be.
You'll be short tempered, you'll beimpatient, you'll be more unkind come on,

(26:00):
it's just a fact, right,Or you'll be absent and you'll be
apathetic and you'll blame it on ahost of things, but the main reason
might be you're just tired, orall of your activities in life are about
breaking you down, not building youup. So think about your sleep patterns.

(26:22):
Get more than get six or morehours of sleep at night, and
think about your habits. Think aboutyour routines. Do they create a place
of rest reading a book, sittingon your front porch, doing a crossword
puzzle, being quiet, just somethingthat brings you rest. Not watching the

(26:45):
news, not scrolling through social media, plan on your phone, not playing
a game, but something that actuallybrings you rest. Because your indication here
you go. Your indication of whereyou are rest why is the interactions you
have with other people. So ifyou're wondering if you need more rest,

(27:07):
look at your interactions with other people, specifically those closest to you, those
aren't going well. That is anindicator. Your interactions are indicators that you
probably need more rest. And Parkerman, I'm raising you to value rest,
and I hope, I hope thatyou'll value rest, both the sleeping and
the habits throughout the course of yourlife. It's good, It's it's a

(27:33):
journey. Um, we're at asimilar journey in our lives. But for
dads and folks who are ahead ofus, Um, you know, listen,
if we missed something or God's onthe wrongs, please, you know,
send us the Amazon link to thebook or the advice that you've got
For those who are just starting outyour journey. You're just starting out dad
life. You've got one kid.Sometimes I think about people who have one

(27:56):
kid, and on one hand,I empathize because I'm like, hey,
I get it. It's a lot, it's it's big, and it's beautiful.
But on the other hand, I'mlike, man, you've got so
much time and the energy. Butanyway, regardless of where you are in
your journey, everything here, like, explore this with us mentally as you're

(28:18):
listening, Explore it in your life, talk to your partner, figure out
where these things resonate and what youcan do. There are a million strategies
out there, but the point iswhen you think about rest, you know,
there's there's the head knowledge of knowingwhat the science says, knowing what's
good for you, and then thenthere's the practice of going, ah,
but I'm gonna make this one smallexcuse me, I'm gonna make this one

(28:41):
small line in the sand. I'mgonna do this one thing and I'm going
to build that into a habit thatthat makes me better. And then just
watch what happens and ask your partner, Hey, I'm gonna I'm trying to
I'm trying to go to bed byten. Can you help me make sure
that I'm in bed by ten orat least close to it, and then
all so go, Hey, I'vebeen trying to do this for a week.

(29:03):
How's it going? Like? HaveI been more present with you?
Like I've been trying to work onthis, Like, how's that going?
Do you see anything and just listengraciously and keep tweaking and adjusting and doing
things. Jonathan, you mentioned breathwork, and we're getting closely into this
conversation here, but one of thethings that I've been doing some reading on

(29:25):
or some more count myself, isagain about breathing. So there's box breathing,
and there's different breathing techniques. Youcan go spiritual with a breathing and
all of that, and that's great. I believe in that stuff, but
you can also go with the science, and the science says if you so.
So here's the here's the tip.Here's the thing that's been a game
changer for me. If you do, you know, slow in breath,

(29:45):
you know, follow your in breathin through the nose, a five count
right, five count in, andthen if you're like at a heightened state,
if you're at a stressed out state, you want your outbreath to be
at least twice as long as you'rein breath. It's good tactical. You
do that one thing and literally thatbegins to deactivate the fight or flight response
in you physiologically. It's a fivecount in and a ten count out,

(30:08):
or an eight count in and asixteen count out and that elongated outbreath literally
brings rest to you in this spaceof two or three breaths. So anyway,
that that's been really powerful for me, and hopefully that's an addition to
everything else. Maybe that's the one, the one little nugget you can try

(30:30):
this week. That's good. That'shuge, huge tactical piece. So Dad's
We've done our best to explain thisto you on what we do just as
examples. But you need to getrest. You need to sleep and get
rest, and then you need todo RESTful habits. Parker Man, Robinson
Girls, Robinson Girls, Robinson LadiesGirls is fine. Yeah, they're girls

(30:51):
for now, the girls for now. We'll change that when we're twenty years
down the road. Listen to y'all, get some rest, go to slate,
have good habits, Parker Man.Always remember, be kind, give
to others, show respect, loveyour mother, and never forget your dad
is really proud of our dad's diaries. A Bramble Jam podcast can be found

(31:15):
ad free by joining bramble jamplus dotcom. Is hosted by Jonathan Parker,
produced by Brendan Gray. You canfind us on social media by going to
at to our dad's diary, clickingthat follow button. See you next week.