Ep. 160 - Norwegian Trolls

Not sure of the exact beginnings, but stories of Norwegian Trolls can be found in the first written sources, the sagas, from the Middle Ages, but they were in oral traditions and people’s imaginations long before that time. The term “troll” actually comes from the Proto-Germanic word “Trullan” which translates to mean fiend, demon, or giant. So some were described as giants, terrorizing entire villages, and others were considered to be small, evil tricksters. In general, most trolls were considered to be cruel, violent, unattractive creatures, with huge noses, big teeth, and grotesque features and were thought to be quite stupid and easily tricked.

While, there is no single agreement as to what trolls may have looked like, most Norwegians agree that there are basically 2 types of trolls, the Trogre and the Troblins. The trolls of the mountains or forest, the Tragre, are generally depicted as large, dumb, and brute-ish and are said to use connections with nature to uproot trees to use as weapons, or to cause ecological disasters such as hurricanes and avalanches. The trolls of the caves, the Troblins, live completely underground & are generally depicted as smaller, with a large round stomach and short, stubby arms and legs. They tend to use their connections with nature to baffle or deceive humans.

On the second half, we reviewed the 2022 film Troll, directed by Roar Uthaug. It is about a troll that is released after being trapped for a 1000 years and destroys everything in its path while it approaches the capital of Norway.

Join us on episode 160 to hear more about the fabled Norwegian Trolls!

Sources: visitnorway.com/things-to-do/art-culture/the-mythical-norwegian-trolls/, ifeinnorway.net/norwegian-trolls/, adventures.com/blog/norway-trolls/, routesnorth.com/language-and-culture/scandinavian-trolls-all-you-need-to-know/, scandification.com/norwegian-trolls-introduction-to-trolls-from-norway/

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Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Paranormal Punches is part of the Podbellynetwork. Go to podbelly dot com for
more great podcasts. Hey, y'all, this is Frank the Bigfoot and you're
listening to the Paranormal Punchers. Hey, friends, welcome to another episode of

(00:35):
Paranormal Punchers where we do things withour mouths, like talking to these microphones.
Give us off off off my commentI made that Nasha decided to run
with ye. I am Mark,I'm Milicious, I'm Nash, I'm Dave.
This time around, we're going totalk about trolls, Norwegian trolls,

(00:57):
because last time we talked about warrewolves, everybody kept saying trolls seem to be
even cooler. So we decided,well, we'll just we'll do it.
And it gives Day of a chanceto talk about something from Norway because he
missed last It was a big discussionlast time, too, so much content
on, so much Because I knowyou don't listen to the episodes, right,

(01:18):
well, I'm going to listen tothat one. I haven't gotten to
you yet. All right, Well, without further ado, Okay, well
this is from visit Norway. Umwith Norway's high mountains. Will you should
say this, and like, ifyou're a tour guide or you're presenting this
as a commercial, I'm not verygood with accents. I'm sorry. No,
no, you would just be like, visit Norway, oh okay,

(01:44):
and go and you're kind of threeoff. This show is smooth, it
flows. Yeah, we're the best. Okay. With Norway's high mountains,
deep fjords, large forests, anddark winter nights, you can easily see

(02:05):
a link to the supernatural. Whatever. People don't understand, they need to
explain it in one way or another. In trolls were as good as an
explanation as any was. That wasthat good that until the stopped, all

(02:28):
right, So not sure of theexact beginnings of like when trolls kind of
came about, but nineteen ninety eightthe Internet, No, they're much older.
Yeah, but they can be foundin the first written sources, the
sagas from the Middle Ages. Theywere also in oral traditions. Um or

(02:54):
I knew it, just Nash,I knew you would do that. Well,
you're the one doing it with yourmouth. Apparently, so were the
vikings in people's imaginations even before thattime. Now, many felt that nature
held many types of creatures, bothreal and mythological, and that humans lived

(03:15):
side by side with them. Theterm troll actually comes from the Proto Germanic
which is also called Common Germanic wordtrulin, which translates to mean fiend,
demon, or giant. Some weredescribed as giants terrorizing entire villages, and
others were considered to be small,evil tricksters. It is believed that the

(03:39):
word troll was used as basically acatch all term to refer to pretty much
any kind of mythological fiend, kindof like ban Yeah. Now, in
general, most trolls were considered tobe cruel, violent, unattractive creatures with

(03:59):
huge noses, big teeth, andgrotesque features, and they were quite stupid
and easily tricks. Well. Imean, if I was a troll,
I would have some problems with humanstoo. I'm saying I'm not attractive.
I mean I started rating villages well, and it's pretty cruel. And for
other trolls looking at each other,they're like, hey, your nose looks

(04:23):
great. The warts you have onthere are really shining out right. I
was just gonna say, if theyhad just used sarcasm, they probably wouldn't
have understand if humans use sarcasm todescribe everything the trolls wouldn't have understanding,
we could have avoided all the wars. A little sarcasm would have gone a
long way. Yeah. Now.Regardless if they were large or small,

(04:45):
they tended to be similar to humans, especially in the shape of their bodies,
with two arms, two legs,and one head. Usually usually they
could have as many as three.It was also common for them to have
one eye. Some were much largerthan humans, looking bulky and fat,

(05:05):
with some some that were covered infur. The small trolls were considered short
and stubby creatures, with some thathad tails and most had frizzy crazy hair.
There is even a version of trollcalled a holdrefolk that looks the most

(05:28):
like a human except for the tail, and are supposed to be beautiful and
seductive, similar to what a sirenlady trolls yeah yeah, yeah yeah.
While there is no single agreement asto what trolls may have looked like,
most Norwegians agree that there are basicallytwo types of trolls. The first one

(05:50):
trolls of the mountain and of theforest, the troguer t r O g
r E. They're generally depicted aslarge, dumb, and brutish, and
are said to use connections with natureto uproot trees to use as weapons,
or to cause ecological disasters such ashurricanes or avalanches. The well, the

(06:13):
hurricanes are just from the un passinggas though. Yeah, that's how they
add ability of the wind. Didyou find that fact on the internet?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it'son there. Okay, hurricanes would be
quite too large. I would thinklocalized tornadoes like a dust size I mean
anyway, anyway, These are alsothe types of trolls that like to use

(06:34):
riddles to try to keep you fromyour destination. These riddles, though,
are usually pretty easy. I wasgonna say, if they're stupid, Yeah,
these riddles should be pretty easy tosolve. Now. These trolls also
annoyed and angered the North Scots andare linked to the origins of the universe

(06:55):
itself. When Christianity was introduced,they were assumed to have become enemies of
the church and would attack priests anddestroy churches things like that. Now,
the other type of troll is thetroll of the Cave at Troublin's. They
live comproved roy They live completely undergroundand are generally depicted as smaller, even

(07:20):
smaller than humans, with large roundstomach and a short, stubby arms or
legs. They tend to use theirconnections with nature to baffle or deceive humans.
They prefer to be isolated, butdo form families, and they enjoy

(07:41):
stirring up trouble for humans, especiallyon Christmas Eve. These trolls in Norse
mythology, they stir up all kindsof trouble for humans, particularly around the
Christmas season, where they will breakinto homes and throw parties. So I
don't think that's that much trouble ifthey're gonna throw a party, right,
Yeah, I'm in Yeah. Well, I also heard a bunch more about
the smaller trolls. So the smallertrolls, some of them because they because

(08:05):
they stay in communities. There havebeen known to be shape shifters of the
smaller trolls that they can shift intodogs, cats, pets, and whatnot.
They can go invisible. They alongthe lines of sneaking into your house.
They will sneak into your house andsometimes eat the food, eat your
food. And they said while thefood is on the table, they'll sneak

(08:28):
in and eat the food and thenyou will realize that you don't have enough.
And I guess that was a thing. Some trolls eat babies, Yeah,
yeah, and the smaller ones theykeep pets, they cook, they
live underground. They're more they're alittle bit higher intelligence, but they're they're
definitely a little more not rambunctious,naughty. They're mischievous. Mischievous, Yeah,

(08:54):
a little scalliwags. I mean,according to the documentary Frozen, some
of them do live above ground andthey're willing to help humans, but only
certain humans. Hey, David,the movies documentary just creating some banter.

(09:15):
But but even then they I thinkthey're still I didn't find if this is
kind of a kind of a questionalso implied question that the female trolls they
didn't really fit into either category,because the female trolls were like what you're
saying about sirens. They were luremen into the forest and humor the people

(09:37):
who came into the forest. Theyhad a name for people who the men
who would go into the forest.They were called the Bertagna b r t
a g na. They were capturedby the females and made slaves to the
female trolls. So I didn't knowif the female trolls were still bigger,
if they were like because the littleones are like little team almost like puck

(10:00):
Wudge size is the way I envisionit. And then the big ones are
like super huge. Maybe they're justthat beautiful that they're a little hot tea
yeah yeah yeah. And these guysare like hey, mamma, and so
they're falling in. They're making little, you know, slaves out of them.
It's it's crazy, and they wouldmake them not just eat babies,
but they would steal babies or babystealers, and they would swap them out

(10:22):
with troll babies. Yeah huh huh. I like the pause when you're like
the lower them into the forest,and I wasn't gonna go. Yeah,
somewhere I realized it's a family show. Yeah yeah, So they just not
really a leap into slaves. Andthe troll babies that they swapped into or

(10:43):
with the human babies, they're calledthey're called borts the boards there the troll
babies called Bortsort. Bort say,you have a D and D character called
Bort. That's my son. Okay, how I prop so anyway, Oh,

(11:03):
anyway, so the first written sourcewas from the famous book called Edda
in twelve twenty, but most ofthe bedtime stories and songs came from ab
Shornsen and Moe, who collected storiesfrom the countryside from eighteen thirty seven to
eighteen seventy one in a similar fashionas the brothers Grimm and I'm pretty sure

(11:28):
the Three Billy Goats Gruff that wasone of their stories. Okay, Now
I have one tale. I don'tknow if anybody has any of the others,
but I thought I would give itto you. Okay. One tale
tells of Asca Ladden, the youngestson of a farmer who needed wood from

(11:52):
the forest to pay off his debts. The the first two songs went into
the forest but songs. Yeah,the first two sons went into the forest,
but came back out with no woodbecause a troll had scared them off.
So Ascaladden went into the forest todo what his brothers could not,

(12:13):
armed only with a piece of cheeseto keep himself from starving. Okay,
he came across the troll pretty muchlike right out the gate and immediately pulled
out the cheese and with quick thinking, pretended it was a rock and squeeze

(12:33):
it until the way come came out. Oh suez really hard. Yeah,
the troll was strength. The trollwas fooled and afraid of this human strength,
and the troll offered to help theboy cut some wood. After working
hard, the troll invited the boyback to his home for a meal.

(12:54):
As he was tending the fire,he pointed pointed to two huge buckets and
asked the boy to fetch water.He realized this is askeladden. He realized
he could not carry such a massivebucket filled with water, so he claimed
to the troll that they were toosmall and perhaps he should just bring the
hole spring instead. The troll didn'twant so much water in his house,

(13:18):
so they exchanged chores. The boytended the fire while the troll went to
get water to make porridge. Now, once the porridge was ready, the
boy suggested that they have an eatingcontest. They ate as much as they
could to outsmart the troll. Theboy placed his knapsack underneath his shirt and

(13:41):
was filling it with porridge, andthe troll never noticed. Once it was
full, he slashed a hole init and continued to eat. Once the
troll was full and couldn't eat anymore, the boy suggested that the troll should
cut a hole in his stomach sothat he could eat as much food as
he liked. Troll, being ratherstupid, did so and promptly died.

(14:07):
The boy took all of the trollsgold and silver, so the farmer could
pay off his debts in anyway,just a funny story, are you?
Yeah? I saw the same story, did you? Okay? Um,
I say you didn't read it.What's that You said you saw the same
story? It was your opportunity toread that story. Well, she said

(14:28):
she had a story. I wasn'tsure which one, so I was letting
her go first. Um, butI like how he stabs himself in the
stomach and promptly dies. That's that'snot the kind of a wound that No,
not usually usually riding an agony.Just well the portroll lie there after
stabbing. Yeah, and its sunlight. They killed the trolls, not a

(14:48):
not a stab wound of the stomach, so or fire or fire? Yeah?
Now Mark pointed this out. Imissed a part in my oats here.
Um, what do you trolls eat? No famous trolls in history?
Oh you sentire section? No,you pointed at that and went to the

(15:13):
fairy tale. Well, you knowwhat you already brought up that they like
to um eat children. They alsolike to eat goats. That's like a
favorite snack or whatever. Anyway,Yes, we have some famous trolls from
Norse mythology. All right, let'srock, Okay, do you want to
just do it? Okay? Now? Uh. The most famous is dover

(15:41):
Gubbinah. He was the king.Yeah, he's the king from a famous
poem Haul of the Mountain King.And in the play I guess, there's
this kid called Pierre falls in lovewith a girl, but it's not allowed
to marry her. So after beingforced to leave home for being unworthy,
Pier finds himself in the Hall ofthe Mountain King, where he is captured

(16:03):
by trolls. He upsets the kingof the trolls when he refuses to marry
the king's daughter and become a troll, so he runs for his life and
barely makes it out in the Hallof the Mountain King alive. This is
also everybody knows this song. Ithink it's been in a lot of movies,
but that d d d okay,See it was very important because I

(16:25):
am backing up everything you have.And that's actually with more Detailship, you
pointed at the wrong thing, andthat was Wagner's opera over four parts.
That was one of them. Uh. Some of the other famous songs from
the opera's Right of the Valkyries andbig telling of Norse mythology throughout the four

(16:48):
parts. The Right of the Valkyries. The only thing I can think of
when I hear that the Vietnam movieApocalypse. Now, okay, all right,
Well another one is Holdra. Sheis identified as a supernatural female.
Um, she's beautiful. Uh,she looks like a human, but she

(17:12):
has a tail of a cow andshe keeps her cow tail under Where's a
big dress and she keeps I thinkit's what National toma earlier. But she
will appear in the mountains or theforest, often luring man in, seducing
them with her beauty and voice.And of course the men are never seen

(17:33):
again. That's right, that's becausethey become slaves. And then she smacks
around with the cowtail. It's likea whip swatting flies. Now, there's
no can It's a vicious and terrifyingtype of troll known for luring people into

(17:53):
watery places and drowning them. Okay, no, can also a neck.
M it's uh guess what noki meansor this is his nickname. But I
imagine a guy that you call theneck has this giant just thick, super
swoll Uh. He's often invisible.Uh. And he could uh shape shift

(18:19):
like he could look just be apiece of wood or anything just floating around
in the water. I could takethe shape of a horse or even a
person. Anything he needs to doto get ahold of his victim's right.
What if his neck was the otherway, like a giraffe. Oh like

(18:40):
he like he like periscopes up youknow. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes he'll
appear as an attractive young man playingthe fiddle and then seduces women and lures
them to their death. And sometimeshe's a shape of a pale gray horse
a man on man who sat onhim was death. Yeah. No,

(19:04):
the man rode on the pale whitehorse and all the death followed with him.
Oh yeah, yeah, you knowwhere I was going with that thing.
Another famous one is Grendel, whichis from the story of be Wolf,
which I read be Wolf when Iwas in school, and I could
have sworn he was a dragon,but I guess not. Sigmund is the

(19:29):
dragon. He fights Grendel and thenGrendel's mother, and then he has to
fight the dragon in the third act. So obviously I didn't pay attention very
well dating that story. It's allright, I got the condensed version for
you, Tore okay, but youknow, the story opens a Denmark king
roth car Roth made this meat homeand people were having fun marry man him

(19:55):
and Grendel doesn't like all the uhnoise of celebrations, so for twelve years
he's just going in at night,taking somebody eating him. And then finally
bay Wolf comes along. He withthe I don't know, a couple of
men. Yeah, the king ofthe Danes sends a plea to the Geats,
which is where Bowolf's from. Hecomes over and they all lay like

(20:18):
they're asleep, but Beowolf was lyingin wait like Chuck Norris. Grendel gets
one of Well, he's not likeChuck Norris because like Chuck Norris, he
wouldn't need to do that. No, but yeah, so Grendel sneaks up,
grabs one of ba wolf soldiers,eats him, kills him, and
then grabs another one. But thishuman grabbed back and Baywolf ripped. Yeah,

(20:41):
Bwolf RiPPs his arm off. I'msure the troubles like, holy crap,
this guy's as bad as Chuck Norris. Yea, And then the story
continues and continuous but yeah, okay, okay. Another one was Yum y
m eat are Okay. It wasoften depicted as both a troll and a

(21:06):
giant um, and there tended tobe a lot of like overlap between the
two species in that area. Butum. And then the last one I
have here is Hrunger, another gianttroll with a massive body and a destructive
nature from old Norse texts. Soyeah, Sogar I was born with neither

(21:30):
head nor heart. So he hada head of stone, and I guess
a hard a stone. But anyway, how do I get around? I
don't know. I saw a coupleof story verses, but one of them
goes that Odin was out riding hishorse that had like six legs and ran
into Ruggnar, who somehow I gotstarted talking about the horse. Odin is

(21:55):
like, well, there's no horsethat could even compare to mine. In
fact, i'd raise your my headon him. So the troll shows him
his beautiful horse and is like,oh shitty magnificent, So you know it's
out with him. He's not gonnagive his head up to this troll.
He takes off. Well, thetroll chases after him and they end up

(22:17):
into the get into Asgard and youknow protocol. Uh if somebody strolls in
the gates of Asgard, Odin's like, all right, m I guess come
to the mead hall and party.So he does. They're drinking, having
a good time. Uh. Thetroll rugnar Uh. He starts feeling that
booze a little out of control,being a bit of a d bag man.

(22:41):
Thor rolls in. I imagine what'sabout to happen. Uh. Thour's
about to crack his hammer down andh end this stupidity, and the Troll's
like, yo, really just kindof striking on armed man and so no,
yeah, I guess not. Sothey plan a duel to meet on

(23:02):
the edge of uh Gods and antigods where they're playing get together. So
uh, the trolls there. He'sgot like a I guess a weapon made
out of stone or whatnot. He'swaiting for Thorne and boom, thunder lightning
and everything and Thor rolls down hitshim in the head with the hammers so
hard that stone from the troll's headlands and penetrates. I penetrates, and

(23:27):
he beds in the Thor's head.He kills the troll. It falls onto
Thor, and it's so heavy Thorcan't even get it off. But then
one of Thor's sons, they're boththe Suns, come and they help get
the troll off of Thor. Okay, okay, there you go, and

(23:48):
then Thor gives the troll's horse toone of his kids. Sounds about right
along the same lines. Uh.You know. In the there's two versions
that the poetic and the pros andand there's all the stories of Thor and
the Norse gods and whatnot, andthey talk about how Thor went on a
campaign against the trolls, and theway they did that in the Marvel movies

(24:11):
is they use the alternate name forthe trolls, which would be Giant,
which is your is his campaign againstthe trolls? Interesting? Well, that
comes up in my next thing,which is no, No, I'm glad
you because I didn't have like likea paragraph fork. So ways to drive

(24:37):
out or combat against trolls. Well, the first one is trickery, just
like the eating competition story that Igave you. Um, So if you're
able to trick them and get themto cut their stomach, I guess I
don't know the but it sound likeit's pretty easy to do. So any

(25:02):
like the basic magic tricks you're gonnado with like a four year old kid
or a three year old kid isgoing to work on a troll right now?
The best way is to ring churchbells. Trolls are considered un Christian
beings and they go crazy when theyhear the church bells and they run far
away. So if you want toget rid of them, you just ring

(25:22):
some some bells and they'll go away, which comes into play we're going to
talk about on the second half.Yeah, trolls are also repelled by lightning,
which kills them. Yeah, andthis is because of Thor and his
many campaigns and adventures. So thankyou, because that's all I had,

(25:45):
all right, So I'm glad youfeeled on with that. Um. Some
legends attests that trolls will turn tostone when they are exposed the sunlight,
so distract them long enough to letthe sun run and that's how you defeat
them. So and did that happenin uh The Lord of the Rings sometrols

(26:07):
or no, the Hobbit in theHobbit when is out in the forest and
the sun came up? And yeah, So anyway, I just have some
miscellaneous things that I wasn't sure whereto put it in my notes. So
well, I actually have a potentialsighting. Oh, go for it now.
In uh September ninth of twenty eighteen, there was a guy these Gabriel

(26:30):
Gatehouse. Was that doesn't sound madeup at all? Yeah, I don't
know, definitely Reel Gatehouse meet GabrielGatehouse. This place is called the culture
House. Now I don't know whatthat is, but it sounds like a
call a place in Stockholm. Maybemaybe a bar, I don't, I

(26:52):
don't know who knows, it couldbe uh whatever. And right outside the
Culture House was a billboard and there'sthis billboard of it was this this person
face on the billboard. It wentto a long detailed political description of who
this person was. That I waslike, why are they talking about this?
Um? Now? There was butthere was a giant. Supposedly a

(27:15):
giant was sticking a piece of paperto this this this billboard. Um,
now, I don't know if thebill it didn't give me the logistical details
I needed, weren't There was thebillboard on the side of the of the
culture House. Was it like awhere it was like a ground level or

(27:36):
was it up in the air.I don't know. But this giant took
a piece of paper and stuck itto just above the eyebrow on this person's
face on this billboard. Did youdraw a penis on it? No,
just a piece of paper, Justlike I thought, maybe he's being a
prankster. You're saying it was apolitical figure on the billboards. The troll
was like, you know what,I'm gonna troll. I'm a troll.

(27:57):
I'm gonna troll this billboard. Andit said that the paper said like uh,
it said like it was like nosomething or no no away, or
it was what it said didn't translatewell. And a guy witnessed it,
and then the troll took off intothe woods and the guy said, well,

(28:18):
I think that was a troll Andthat's really the only recent signing into
the cross. Let me guess hedidn't have his phone on him, no
phone, and that's why I wonderingit is the Culture house, a bar
coming out of the Culture House.Yeah, a quote unquote bar who knows

(28:38):
came out and somebody was putting graffitior doing something up on this this billboard.
And he was like, hey,man, that's a troll could be
But that is really the only oneI found. Okay, Yeah, I
didn't find anything, but you haveto believe to see, right, And
there was there was a couple ofpictures. There was a couple of images
from like nineteen forty two. Uh, there was a mountain troll photo that

(29:03):
was taken three hundred miles from Bergenin nineteen forty two, and you can
see the troll in the distance.Now. But what the two the two
photos that I found, the theactual photos troll had the same body from
of the troll from troll Hunters thatthey just superimposed it, or if they

(29:26):
took one from the other and itwas the same thing with this other picture.
So I had it as as writtendown there and then yeah, because
so it could have been photoshops.Yes, so who knows who knows stole
it? Yeah, yeah, exactly, that's exactly right, or the or
the or the media people. Thepeople who are coming up with the poster

(29:47):
stole it from the picture. Youknow, you just don't know. We
just don't know that. Okay,all right, well so I found that
mouth. Most Wow. Most mythsagree that trolls can't do magic, though
some stories give the Norwegian forest trollsshape shifting powers. Which you did bring

(30:10):
that up, ye, uman,scand I know I did, I really
did. Scandinavians, would you putin that water bottle? It's just water?
Uh. Scandinavian troll painting was actuallyvery popular in the nineteenth century,

(30:30):
with several artists that they made aliving from painting the creatures, and then
also in the late nineteen fifties DaneThomas Dan. That seems like a name,
Thomas d Yeah, that doesn't seemlike a correct but anyway, Dane
Thomas Dan, Dane Thomas, Dan, Thomas Dan. Okay. He carved

(30:53):
a wooden troll for his children andstarted a craze for ugly troll figures with
wild, brightly colored hair, whichI had ye when I was young.
Um. They were designed to makepeople laugh, and according to legend,
when you laugh, luck follows.Oh yeah, everybody out there is feeling

(31:15):
lucky. Sure we made you laugh, right please? Yeah, And trolls
show up in D and D.Yep, yeah, I'm sure if anybody
play it, they know that largechaotic evil m A class fifteen hit points
eighty four walk in the park.Yeah, well then tell me how can

(31:40):
you kill it? The magical weaponor fire? Okay, because it has
regenitive powers, so on its turn, every time around it gets hit points
back. It makes a multi attackwith a bike and a claw, which
with a plus seven is almost ahit every time. Right, Yeah,
it's upt how you roll? Yeah, D and D they describe them as

(32:00):
fears, some green skinned giants.Trolls eat anything they can catch and devour.
Only acid and fire can arrest theregentative properties of trolls flesh, and
if they get to zero hit points, they still come back unless you hit
them with fire. Fire. That'swhy you don't see many like firetrolls.

(32:24):
Correct, all right, but yeah, yeah they're prolific. Yeah, but
the firetrolls not so much. Andon that note, why didn't we take
a quick break and we're gonna comeback and talk about the Netflix movie troll
We'll be right back and we're back. God you guys are talking oftener about

(32:50):
the stuff I want to record now, right, hopefully you can remember the
stuff yours and um, all right, any final thoughts on Norwegian trolls before
we get into the movie discussion.Well, I did. I did appreciate
that a lot of the images Ifound of Norway where they where you can
just be out hiking and there's literallya face carved in the rock, like

(33:12):
sitting on the ground covered in moss, or they're just they're all over the
place. Yeah, And I someof them were like the sides of a
cliff. You could see that theywere like, oh, that's a troll
face that was frozen in stone.And you could just go out in nature
and somebody took the time to carvefaces into things out in the woods.

(33:34):
I think that's pretty cool. Iagree, all right, Dave, I'm
good. Okay. Troll the movieNetflix original directed by Roar. Didn't he
do the Wave? Yeah? Hedid do the Wave. I love that
movie. That's a great movie.And tomb Raider also which Tom Rader eighteen.

(33:58):
I think the guy no fox now, but she's her name is as
a Ven. I'm pretty sure itdoes. I didn't write it down Star
Wars one of them. She it'llcome to me, but it's not.
He did not direct anything with AngelinaJoelie. Now, which Nash, did
you say those movies where as Angelianjoel Deeli. Yeah, they're terrible,

(34:22):
They're terrible, terrible. You preferthe that's the best one. I'm not
saying that the twenty eighteen one wasby far a good movie, but I
think it's hands I think it's sofar ahead of Angelie Joelia one. I
mean, I think there's some cheesyfun with the Angelina Jelly Ones. Yeah.
I never saw the twenty eighteen one, but the first Angelina Jeli one

(34:44):
were there in the trampoline's going acrosstheir their living room and all that stuff.
Yeah, no, no, thanks, felt like the video game.
Yeah, and she looked like thepart. She did look like the part.
Yeah, I'll give you that.But either way this director did,
that's just the same as Mummy.I put in the same category as the
Mummy, you know, Kevin Jayasked, and I said, do you

(35:07):
really want to know the answer?But now it's like, what would you
give the Mummy one to ten?One to ten? Because you gave Viking
Wolf seven out of ten, I'mgonna amend that after watching this movie,
I'm gonna amend that uh plus orminus plus. Oh oh yeah, I'm
gonna take it from a seven pointfive to uh eight to five based on

(35:28):
after watching We're gonna talk about Yeah, after watching this movie, Ahead points
in it that I liked about it, that I wish were in this one
that I that weren't. I feellike I like this one better than Viking
Wolf personally, but I think thiswas better than Viking. Yeah. Oh
god. Anyway, so the movie, I have the tagline, Yeah,

(35:50):
it's with the tagline mountains Will Move. All right, that's it. Yep.
Well I have a synopsis too,but that the tagline was right,
yeas will move. It does openwith a little girl and her dad mountain
climbing and insane aerial shots ya ofNorway, and I'm like, I think

(36:10):
I want to beautiful Yea, Ihave not, but it's like the highest
on my bucket was like in thesurrounding area of Oslo. I think it
was beautiful. It was gorgeous.Yeah. The sometimes when I'm working I
just need like background distraction, soI'll put on YouTube. They make four
k traveling through Norway. It's justambient noise of them traveling and the scenery.

(36:36):
It's like, this is perfect.That's cool. I gotta I'm gonna
find that actual. How warm doesit get in the summer in Norway?
Average average heat is about seventy fivedegrees It's as about as high as it
gets, but as cold, butyou get the northern lights, so it
works. Yeah. Yeah, becauseI've been trying to convince Stephanie to move
the Norway and uh, where areyou going to live? Exactly? Well,

(37:00):
I'm gonna be in Norway. She'snot gonna be there. You know,
our shows big in Norway. Weshould all just move to Norway.
Yeah. The real estate property,Oh my god, I go to a
whole dissertation about the dollar to theto the Norwegian whatever the dollar is translation.
Yeah, we we would be doingvery well there. Yeah. Of
course. Now we did two episodesabout Norwegian folklore. Maybe we're not as

(37:22):
popular anymore in Norway the whole country. It's pretty cold there, but it's
a beautiful country. Beautiful country.The summers are actually equal to what it
is right now outside. That's ashad as it gets though. Yeah,
beautiful, but they get to thetop of the mountain and the dad's just
trying to show the daughter the somemountains that are called like trolls tooth.

(37:49):
I think something like that. Ithink it was something like that, the
troll peaks, troll peaks. That'swhy I take notes. Why might I
look at him? Um? Andit's but it's relays like a fairy else
story that there was a wedding andthere was thirteen trolls and they were partying,
got wicked drunk, and the suncame up and turned them in to

(38:10):
the stones. The trolls peak.Yeah. I really liked how they kind
of morphed the peak itself into thefaces, because you kind of saw something
in there to begin with a littlesponsible to work, and then they kind
of morphed it and then they dialedit back and they're like, oh,
yeah, I can see my imaginationdoing that. And I feel like the
little girls kind of like yeah,but he's like, you gotta believe,

(38:31):
and she kind of like she kindof just starts looking at Malagy and kind
of see the faces in there,very relative to later in the movie,
because she has to believe to findways to solve the problem. Right,
but that, yeah, we getthat, and boom we're in the modern
day. Well, she's growing upand she's digging up dinosaurs. She became

(38:54):
a what do you call that intelogist? Yep, that that t rex skull
was only what two feet under thesand? Yeah, it was kind of
shallow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like, oh, you
found that pretty quick. Okay.And if you look closely in the background,
there's an easter egg and Nick Cagetrying to buy it already. He's

(39:17):
talking to the guy and I didhave a question about on the movie with
the whole dig. So the guycame out of his little areas, a
little camp or whatever it was,talking to the guy about financing the dig.
Okay. So they're going back andforth and back and forth. When
that scene ends and it goes tothe next scene where she's being introduced,

(39:37):
she's coming in to talk to thegenerals and stuff, she says she financed
the dig. Oh okay, yeah, And I was a little confused on
that, or maybe she's trying totake credit maybe yeah, maybe, or
that she found the t rex houleso she got paid a bunch and so
she continued to finance Okay, maybeI financed it because I found the bones

(39:58):
and then it gave us more moneyto keep digging. Yeah, I was
trying to me, Yeah I thinkso so um yeah, but uh,
you know, we get we getthis moment where there's protesters, they're digging
in the mountain, and I didfeel that the movie had a huge overtone
or undertones of climate change. Beingrespectful to nature. Maybe you don't need

(40:20):
to, you know, drill atunnel through this mountain, which is zactly
what they were doing. Do doverdover mountain, and you can only imagine
a movie called a Troll and peopleare dynamite and digging holes in the mountain.
Something's abound to come out. Yep. And it did, and then
we get our troll yep yep.Yeah. I have all kinds of funny,

(40:42):
odd ball questions about it. Okay, you know when they when she
meets in the general she meets likeher staff guy that follows her around.
The guy who's going to be acomic book creator or whatever was turns into
an author in the end. Yeah, there's a scene when they're talking in
with the generals and he has likea fifth of something. You see a
bottle that he's that has, likeit's like a bottle of booze in sitting

(41:05):
with the general. So I'm like, is that dude drinking? Seeing they're
getting slashed in this movie, it'sprobably not easy being on that council.
I guess not. I guess not. And then the stealing of jumping into
somebody's tapping somebody's phone without a warrant. I don't know Norwegian laws that well,
but is that legal in Norway?Well, but if you looked at
the footage, the person is dead, so they had no rights at that

(41:28):
point. Oh okay, okay,okay, got me. I didn't look
at that. I just we needthis hacker that works for the government to
get death footage to show all thesepeople that are going well, maybe it's
you know, gas gas pockets,or maybe it's like sink sinkholes. I'm

(41:50):
like, it's shaped like a foot. It's a foot, right, and
the guy's like a yeah, sinkholes, Like yeah, no, um again
that's uh. Sometimes the human careactors uh, and we're annoying because they're
so stupid, they're so over thetop for their stereotyping their role. Yeah,
to the point where we need theycall it. They go get Nora,

(42:10):
like they just say, oh,we need I don't even know how
they got there, like we needsome scientists that study's and they land on
a paleontologist, right, well,she's like a paleontologist, biologist. That's
that's convenient, right. That didwear it out. But then when she
gets here she points it out rightaway, like are you kidding me?

(42:31):
Their footprints and all the military guysdon't want to listen to her, right
yeah, making them like just hugeAnd it stays that way pretty much and
the whole the whole time, especiallythe one guy. That guy is just
a tool. Yeah I did,I did. I didn't really care for

(42:51):
the I need to go get likethe crazy old guy because it's the same
thing in the World Wolf movie.They needed to go get the crazy old
guy whom everything they had to godo this with this one in this movie
the crazy old guy was her dad? Was her dad? Yeah? But
why did because are we going heavyspoilers. It's on Netflix, it's been

(43:13):
there for a little while, ithas been there, it's been there for
over two years. I think,yeah, um yeah, Well, when
they're like certain things are happening,like she's like, kind of get my
dad. He's an expert on this, maybe he can help. She doesn't
want to say trolls. Everybody's stilldenying that there's like a giant creature running
around. They're still trying to likefind ways to explain it. They don't

(43:35):
want to, but they don't evenlean in hard to like, well,
maybe the only thing he contributed wasthe footsteps stopped there. But that was
a cool scene. That was whereI was like, we don't we kind
of laid down to take a napand when he can see it, but
he had like a map and he'slike, yeah, this this is not
on the map. This is theformation that an eyeball opens him. He

(43:59):
actually thought that was cool. Sothe troll was camouflaged because it's like rock
and has moss. So I justlaid down to take a nap and nobody
could figure out where it was.He just looked like a little bump in
the on the mountain. Yeah.I have notes, like why does she
need her dad if she knows it'sa troll. I can tell you why
she needed your dad, because whenhe got killed by the troll and his

(44:22):
dying thing, he said, yougotta believe leading back, because she had
to convince people like, look,man, this is a this is a
troll. We need to fight itwith stuff that we've heard in legend and
lore. Um. Because they werelike like there's one scene where the military
and then the real the d bagguy. Um, he's talking about hey,

(44:46):
man, like, look, wegotta be serious here, we gotta
you know, use uh you know, we got these missiles and I'm like,
you're talking about they're talking about nukes. Hes talking about he wants to
nuke it right away. The government'salways like, let's just nuke it,
right What's what what's the worst thatcould happen? Yeah, because like they
already tried tanks and that stuff didn'twork, and that's when her dad dies,

(45:08):
when their first attempt to shoot it. It was like Bazukas and uh
he because he stops the stands infront of him. He's like, hey,
hey, it's cool man, it'scool, and the troll does kind
of like kind chills a little.It's almost like he's taming a velociraptor.
It was very a lot of thisguy. I was like, this is

(45:30):
a lot like Jurassic Park in abunch of different ways. But what was
funny in that scene is one ofthe UH soldiers was injured and he was
like praying that he had he washolding on to his cross, praying to
God, and her dad was like, oh, showed her daughter. They
all kind of they all kind oflike split because the trolls like Sniffy's like

(45:52):
he smells the blood of a Christianand everybody was like, get away,
get away from him. Yeah,like okay, he's gonna let the roll
him bunch on him while you makea your escape. Right. Yeah.
Then there was the UH. Therewas a little part, a little misogyny
part in there. And they wentback after out of the second meeting.
It was her going, no,it's a troll. Dad was dad,

(46:14):
And they reconvened again and she's like, no, it's a troll. It's
a troll. And the in thed bag was like, no, it's
not you're crazy, and they andthey go to the assistant. Then they're
like, well what do you thinkAnd he goes like it's a troll and
they go, oh, okay,well then it's a troll then, and
I'm like what this is Because she'sa woman, They some of the military
guys were really just treating her verypoorly. Yeah, like they like,

(46:37):
yeah, the guys that were like, you know, maybe it's a gas
pocket, maybe sinkoles. Yeah,they were treating her like. She was
just laughable with her ideas, andI think she said, look, I'm
not gonna be able to work withmister Sinkole over here. Right. Yeah.
I thought that was kind of funny, but I guess again we needed
to be shown that they're not willingto accept that it's troll right, right,

(46:58):
it's some type of creature. Theycan't explain it, so we'll just
nuke it because we all know howthat works out. What giant creatures went,
fun, you just make it morepowerful the Godzilla. Yeah. So
so it kept going and kept going. Then there was kind of the not
really a training montage, but littleslowness happened right then, and then it

(47:19):
was time to And the movie isnot a long movie, like hour forty
three, not even that. Ithought it was an hour and a half.
Yeah, and they had it andcredit scene, but they did it.
I look for it. Oh,it's because Netflix went to a trailer
and it didn't let me watch.Really, I hate when Netflix does it,
Yeah, maybe I want. Ieven I even went to the very

(47:40):
end it look to see if itwas there, and it still kicks me
to a trailer and let me watchit. Um, this is where.
This is where for me, themovie really died off where I made it.
So I didn't like it is themovie went from like you have to
believe in reverence and you know,all this thing about the troll and appreciating

(48:01):
the troll and like refering and whatnottoo. We gotta kill this thing.
And they all with that, eventhe girl, she was like that.
Everyone was like, we're gonna go. I'm gonna figure out. They're like,
let's figure out how to kill it. Yeah, but at least her
plans were following some of legend andit would not destroy the entire town of

(48:21):
Oslo with a nukes. So oneof the first thing they try is church
bells, and we talked about that, yeah, that they hate that sound.
And they get what four chop chopterschapters four choppers with giant bell on
him and it was working. Theywere surrounding him and then just like King
Kong, he just started swatting outthere at was I was taleling it up
and then he grabbed one and usedit to knock another one. I'm like,

(48:44):
oh, nope, that's two entering. But then, okay, there's
this little kid that got ice creamingand ran off. His dad's like,
don't go too far. I'm like, hey, hey, good good parenting.
And you're at an amusement park fullof people that you don't know,
and you let your kid run offwith an ice cone. It seems like
that's a good way to lose himin the crowd, and he sort of

(49:05):
does. Why the kids standing therein control and the But anyway, the
chopper's dad finally finds the kid uhand grabs him just for the choppers about
the land on him. The trollcatch it and she's like, did everybody
see that? Beause did he didyou see that? Right? Yeah?
The troll uh? Because later inthe movie the troll king had kids.
Yeah, so there was a moment. He's like, no, But also

(49:25):
we talked about trolls eating babies.I guess this kid was above the age
of eating no longer tasty de trollssave the kid again. We're trying to
give some what do you call that, give some humanity right control? We
need as audience members need to likelike, oh wait, baby's not all
bad. Don't nuke. Yeah yeah, and that that could have that could
have shaded it for me too,because it was like, as we were

(49:47):
learning the detrol had a heart andcould think that's why. At the same
time they're like, Okay, wegotta kill it, We really gotta kill
it. And then King Kong.Yeah, they King Dong this thing and
they met with the King of Oslow. Say, that's why Stephanie stopped watching
it. She just knew that.She knew, like King Kong, yeah,
control is going to die. Andthey went underneath the King's palace in

(50:10):
Oslow, and that's where all theskeletons. Yeah it was. It was
it the was it the Queen's Palaceor I don't know, but yeah,
it was. And the guy itwas the royal palace and he said,
uh, it's considered like good goodluck or something to build, uh,
to be built on top of anotherking's home. And they built it on

(50:31):
the King's mountain, right, Butthen they have this whole. He opens
up a door and they're able togo down into the right off the garage,
deepest of the palm. It waslike right there in the garage,
right. It's it's like go downthe going this door and you're gonna go
there's a restroom right there, andyou can go up to the palace,
or you go on this door andyou go down the long hallway to the

(50:52):
skeletons of giants. Yep and h. He tells the tale how the they
lord for controls. Oh, no, the troll king had all his family
there because he believed in family.Uh. And but they got ambushed.
But the king was lured away withone of his kids to Dover Mountain where
they trapped him and hoped he woulddie. But he didn't, right,

(51:15):
Which that's the biggest implausibility of anythinghere. They do all that, and
they when somebody files a permit toblow up the mountain to build a tunnel,
they don't say, no, that'sall limits, right, right.
If they this this underground uh lairor whatever full of bones, they know

(51:44):
it. So the Royal Palace shouldhave been likened, yeah, because just
in case it didn't die a militarytesting or something. But it had been
trapped in there for like a thousandyears, correct, But it still it's
the same palace. Still knew aboutit. Yeah, and even if it
was dead, uncovering bones like that, they probably didn't want the public to

(52:07):
know either. Especially Yeah, thatwould have been shut down immediate national forest
or something just protected wildlife zone oryou know if if it's one of those
things where you're going to trap somebodyfor thousands of years and hope they die,
well maybe you have some sort ofreconnaissance to go in and see that
they're actually dead. True. Yeah, that's like the Crusade, the society

(52:32):
that monitors that mountain, right andthat. Yeah, they would just trying
to national forest land or something likethat. You can't. It would have
been like in your favorite movie TheMummy, that group that thousands of years
or making sure nobody found the tombof or like in the Entrance and the
Last Crusade. Yes, yeah,the Grail. Yeah, it was their

(52:57):
name. They were like something ofthe Grail. Yeah. Um, they
would totally have something like that tomake sure nobody messed with this mountain right
right, You're right, I cansee how that made you angry. I
didn't make me angry. This movie. Well, let's keep going through.
I'll give my final thoughts on it. Okay. I thought maybe the one
part. I'm like, really okay, uh that's the one huh. So

(53:22):
yeah, she devises a plan,Nora divide the devices a plan, and
she needs like the biggest vehicle inthe Queen's uh. And it's a it's
a truck eighties Chevy or yellow Chevypickup yea. And the guy's like,
this is her favorite. But anyway, they load us troll skallabre yep.

(53:44):
I'm like, ah, okay,I mean visually, I guess it's kind
of cool, it's kind of weird. I thought it was a boulder to
begin with, because I was like, why the heck. I thought it
was like I went back and hadto watch it because I was doing something
in the middle of it. Ithought, it's that a boulder in the
back of that pickup. But yeah, because he's making his way to because
he's making his way to his home, his home. Yeah. So so

(54:06):
on the baby's skull, that's thefootage I wanted to see. I wanted
to see them. I want toknow. I wanted to see them because
it was Norah, the quote unquotenerdy assistant guy and the king quote unquote.
He was definitely the nerdy assistant guy, right, okay, hol whatever.

(54:27):
But and then the guy who hadthe cane, right, it was
just the three of them down inthere. I wanted to see them load
that skull in the back of thatpickup. Well, they just had a
quick rapher. Sorry, now we'regonna need some because I was like,
I was like, I want tosee those three people load that skull into
the back of that pickup. Ectinally, like when the troll king did get
the skull, it was pretty smallin his hands. So I'm assuming they

(54:47):
were all like very young means man. That's why they're able to ambush and
yeah, murder all those smaller trolls. Well, there was big trolls in
there too, but there were alittle team tiny ones also. But also
the trolls were kind of like madeout of stone, so the skeletal structure
probably wasn't that important to their theirbeing, So the skulls maybe very light

(55:09):
weight. They were just there asa well that's what it's like. The
guy with the cane just like becausebut these skulls weren't turned into stones yet,
because that's how the girls are murderedin inside the mountain. Yeah,
but when they knew But if I'mpretty sure under the stone facade. Well,
I'm saying the reason that a thousandyears ago, years ago to ambush,

(55:30):
and they would have been using swordsarrows, so they were all ling,
so they didn't develop the hat.Maybe that tough. Yeah, still
because obviously tanks and bazookas were justlike he was just brushing it, nothing
to him. Just yet I thoughtthat too. They're like, they're all
in the cave and the only sunlightcan kill a troll, but they're underground.

(55:52):
How do all these trolls die?They were, but they don't explain
it. They just said and theywere ambushed. So my way thinking once
I saw how when the troll heldthat skull, like, oh it's small,
they basically murdered babies. Yeah yeah, and that's why they led him
away with the remaining baby, becausethey knew they couldn't kill him. They
needed to trap him. That's thethat's what I got out of it.

(56:15):
Yeah, yeah, So then theylure him out. They lure him into
some park somewhere through downtown Oslo,across the river into a park and zap
him with the UV lights and thenright because Nora calls the captain Chris he's
not gonna follow or is he gonnafollow her orders? And then like,

(56:37):
hey, it's it's really lucky thatyou guys have eight of these vehicles with
giant UV lights on the back rightand like the biggest breaker box I've ever
seen. I'm so glad they hadthem handy, right. They what they
did is they shipped them in becausethey are usually Gougzilla lights, because that's
they have all kinds of weapons likethat to fight Ontilla, but they just

(56:59):
had to import them for this specificneed. So we have they fire him
up and it actually starting to burnthem and it's working, and Nora has
a change of heart. Yeah,and that it was the whole you know,
uh, just respect them and believein them, and wow, this
is amazing the fairy tale and thenit switched with switches to kill them all,

(57:22):
kill the damn thing. And thenat the very end she's like,
hold on, don't do that,even though I told you to do this,
and we set this thing up togetherand then the sun gets them right.
She pulls the giant breakers out ofthe box across across the park and
there's only just a moment You're like, okay, now what she saved the

(57:44):
troll and here comes the sun andhe turns. The stone crumbles down,
and I'm sure they're gonna build apark around him, and you know,
kids can play on the Dad trollsure to be fun, no as one
does you on the post credit scene. So I was thinking that when they
when he saw the baby's skull andthey gave out that roar, that that

(58:06):
would awaken any other living co trollsin the area. He was like calling
out to whoever was there. Now. I didn't see the post credit scene,
but the post credit scene is likeI guess back in dovery mountain dover
mountain um and you see rubble andhere they start and then something just burst
up out of the stone. I'massuming it's now the young ling that they

(58:30):
used to lure him away. He'snow a little bigger, yeah, or
the youngling is what came up first, and that's the king. This was
I feel like this was the trollking. Yeah, yeah, and the
royal house was built on top ofthe hall of the Mountain King. That's
what I kind of gathered, um. But also yeah, I think this

(58:52):
was his kid. He was big, bigger now and mad right, but
only to be used if this ifNetflix, uh, if they made enough
movie with this one to make thenext troll which they cannot call Troll too.
Troll Too. He's one of themost amazingly bad movies that it makes

(59:15):
it just so much fun to watch. And I think you guys would have
rather watched Control Too. I'm gonnacircle back Control Too, but I think
I think I could see with everybodyeverybody's looking that I feel I know how
the scores are gonna go on thismovie. So let's just wrapped this up
and I'll start with lish. Ihave trivia for it, okay, but

(59:38):
I can give you my okay,all right. So Billy Campbell, he
had a small role, and it'shis character's name is doctor David C.
Cordu. So he's named after BillyCampbell. Yeah, oh yeah, I
was going to get to that movie. Oh did we just ruin the trivia?

(01:00:04):
No, but I'm getting to it, okay. Uh. He's named
after his role in Rocketeer. Hisname was Cliff Sacred or c Cordum,
and Dave Stevens was the creator ofthe Rocketeer comic book, and so his
name is doctor David S. CordSo they took both names anyway. Screenwriter

(01:00:25):
espen Akin he's a huge fan ofRocketeer and adjusted the character in the screenplay
when he knew Campbell was cast.When first given the screenplay, Campbell received
a copy with a fake title TheRocketeer two The Last Flight. That's not

(01:00:46):
that fair because he's like, no, gret uh. And then the only
other thing I found. The soundthat you hear over Oslo when the trolls
near is the sound of flight alertor fly alarmin. It is mostly used
to make people known about a comingthreat, like a terror attack or a

(01:01:09):
gas leak or earthquake. This soundis tested twice a year. The last
time it was played for real wasan Oslo in twenty eleven, and I
just thought it was cool they usedthe same sound or whatever. But interesting.
So anyway, what do you ratethis movie? I could probably give

(01:01:30):
it. I would probably give aseven seven and a half. But okay,
Nash, I now I'd be lowerthan Viking Wolf. Yeah. Now,
I thought the movie was put together. I thought it was a very
very well done movie as movies going, I was like, wow, this
is it's gorgeous, It's perfect.You know. I really liked how they

(01:01:52):
put the whole thing together. Thestory, I give it about a six
and a half. Okay, butthis may my Viking wolf go up to
an eighth. Okay, yeah,okay, so you like Viking with more
than troll Okay, yeah, dave. Uh hard to say on a number
scale. Uh so a letter startingwith A and ming and Z and wherever

(01:02:15):
you fit in the middle. That'snot how my letters go. But okay,
Um, anyways, the uh yeah, so a quick die tribe on
this um the Yeah, the productionvalue on this movie was a lot more
than I was expecting. Um,you know what they went through with all
the the scenery, with all theum special effects. The CGI was really

(01:02:37):
good. Um. But just evenlike when they're blowing up the mountain,
it it's like, okay, Idon't know where they got to set location
where they could set all that up. I mean it was a big stage.
However they set that up and thensetting explosives and everything, and then
you know it just it just builtand built and built, and I loved
how they It was very well donemovie. Right. I don't know what

(01:02:59):
the budget was on this, butI was expecting a low budget thing and
this was much better than I thoughtit was going to be. UM.
The story was intriguing. I likedit. It was an interesting take on
a monster movie like a King Kongor Godzilla or something not quite to that
level. But the thing that reallygot me is there was so much redundant,

(01:03:20):
not needed dialogue and stuff, andI just kept losing interest, and
so I would just I was watchingit all my tablet, sitting outside drinking
beer. But then I'd ano theirbeer and I'm like, I don't even
feel like pausing. I liked thekitchen. I'll just let a play.
I know what's happening and so andlike I got back and I'm like,
I don't feel like I missed anythingsome of it, you know, some
of the things we were just talkingabout, I must have missed um.

(01:03:43):
But at the same time, it's, you know, I don't feel like
I've missed anything. That's the biggestthing of Like, I this was the
greatest movie that I never want towatch again. What do you give it
for somebody who hasn't seen it,I would say a nine. You have
to watch it for watching it again, moving for you, right, Yeah?

(01:04:05):
For if for somebody watching it again, I'll give it the two US.
I wouldn't there's no reason to watchthis again. No rewatch. Yeah,
um, I I feel you ona bunch of your comments. Um.
I thought the uh cinematography look great. Seeing Norway was like highlight.
It was gorgeous. Um. TheCGI on the troll it was really cool.

(01:04:30):
Yeah, and I like some ofthe stuff they did where it could
just laid down and take a nap, but it was kind of camouflages.
Would you be standing right next toit and have no clue? Uh?
I like, because we were talkingabout trolls and church bells and some of
it, trying to use some ofthat to to stop this creature without nuking
and ruining that beautiful way. Thenwe got to see everything. So when

(01:04:54):
the troll was on screen and theywere trying to do what you would expect
the military doing, Holy crap,it's a monster, you gotta shoot it.
But when the troll wasn't uh presentand we had to just deal with
humans talking and stuff, I waslike, just like, move along,
come up. In fact, Iknow you didn't like the dad, but

(01:05:15):
at least at least he was interestingbecause he was a little a little crazy
hit. All these theories and buthe was one hundred percent righte about everything.
Yeah, I just didn't like thetrope of needing The old guy.
Yeah, I just thought he wasI just thought he was like more interesting
than everybody else. So if itjust been him and his daughter, yeah,

(01:05:36):
I thought Nora did a good job. Yeah, whatever the actress's name
is. There's just a lot oftalk that well. There was one scene
where he's trying to explain to theto her dad, the old Guy about
his comic book, Guy Day.He was like, yeah, well he
take Yeah, he takes his headoff and throws it at people and it
can bite him. I was like, I'd read that comic book, but

(01:05:57):
a lot of times, especially themilitary people sitting around the table, it
was just so boring, right yeah, and they were so cliche stupid,
and you wanted to just smack himoutside the head, Like, listen to
her before you knuke this thing,which is only going to destroy Oslo and
it's not gonna work. Ye,listen to her again. It's like when

(01:06:17):
you see something this creature walking aroundand someone says, I think it's a
troll. Would you believe it ifyou're looking at like I think you might
be right, right, yeah,And how could the how could the DBS,
the generals and the guy, howcould they not look at the footage
and go, that's a troll,right, call a troll called a giant's
call whatever you want to call it, called Steve, I don't care,

(01:06:40):
whatever you want to. And Steveneeds taken care of. And they do
give him a shot to use someof the thing ways to stop patrol.
They do give him a shot,but you really don't want to. And
even at the end where sunlight's working, the one guy still like they were
going to abort the mission to nukeit, and he's like, no,

(01:07:01):
no, no, shoot that thing. Shoot it now when you could see
on screen the lights working, numberone, I can't imagine that that nuke.
Well, it wasn't gonna work,but it's a it's really expensive.
So when the lights are working onit, and like, hey, let's
save that a couple billion dollars weapons, let's see if this works first.
No, he went until he gotgot punched out by the hacker person.

(01:07:27):
All right, probably my favorite favoritecharacter in the whole movie, and he
was my least favorite, but hewas meant to be like every yeah,
yeah, yeah, he's anti everythingthat you're hopefully you feel about the movie.
Well, as soon as they addedhumanity to the troll, Patrol wasn't
the antagonist anymore. Yeah, Patrolwas a plot point. They needed the

(01:07:47):
antagonist, and that was the badgeneral guy. Yeah, but when I'm
watching a monster movie, just giveme the monster rightly. I feel like
that's what was lacking. Right,There was a lot of the monster more
than I think, like the oneGodzilla movie that came out not too long
ago. Yeah, he wasn't init very long, so I felt like

(01:08:08):
there was a lot of troll init, but um, there could have
been more. So what did younever actually said, I'm gonna just give
it, like right, a fiveout of ten, right, Like,
it didn't suck. I didn't hateit. I just felt that there was
some stuff that could have been maybetrimmed, and there could have been more
of one thing and a lot.Like I said, I just didn't when
it was only humans on screen,I was bored. Yeah, when the

(01:08:30):
troll is on screen, it's like, what's gonna happen? But I was
really into, like let her tryto use all kinds of crazy things from
me, from the mythology of thetrolls. Try to stop it. That'd
be awesome. I was kind ofhoping to that towards the end. If
it wasn't a big killed kill boxthat they brought up the thing into that
they would leave it out of townand be like, no, go and

(01:08:51):
just go back to where you camefrom. Whatever you like. In Harry
the Harrison's yeah, yeah, that'sthat's what I was getting out of here.
Yeah. I didn't. I didn'tcare for them King Kong killing the
killing the moster at the end.That's what brought my h Werewolf movie up,
is that the werewolf went off inthe woods at the end and survived.

(01:09:13):
Was off. But watch it foryourself. Make your own decisions,
because we are not critics, we'renot professionals. We just know sometimes if
we like something and we don't likesomething, right, tell you what most
of you probably think you would hate, but I guarantee you would love it.
It's troll too. And our Patreonsupporters said we should do a MST

(01:09:35):
three K of troll Too, whichmeans we would watch it and film was
watching it on it huh yeah,and you I know you two have never
seen it and I've never seen it. You would be a surprise. Yeah
it's bad, trust me. Yeahit's bad, but it becomes like hilarious.
Yeah, I'll be up for it. As Chris Stuckman would say,

(01:09:57):
a hilariosity all right, well maybewe'll do that for Patreon. Yeah yeah.
Plus I just want you guys tosee it. Yeah, all right,
that's it. We're done. Ifyou if you like the show,
uh, drop us a review whereveryou listen to the show or Apple and
Spotify for sure, but the otherchannels do reviews now, other channels,

(01:10:18):
other aggregators, I'm not sure.I don't know. I don't know you
or just email us if you likeour review. Yeah, we don't need
Apple were Spotify, you know forreviews. You can just send it right
to us. Uh, Parallel punchersdot com. You find all the ways
to contact us. We do havea Patreon for only one dollar. You

(01:10:39):
get Dave what did they get earlyaccess at free episodes and supporting us and
if we have cool content, experimentalcontent first discord server, I did say
you get to help us pick themovie, but we haven't done that.

(01:11:00):
He had and I think it's abouttime to let our Patreon supporters pick a
movie because we just we had likefour bombs in a row. Someone weren't
that bad, but nothing like we'rewalking away going this is I'm going to
buy this on Blue red right right, all right, that's it until next
time. Everybody, remember it's notweird. It's not worth checking out.