From Pompoms to Boardroom: Courageously Speaking with Maria Cabande

In this episode of Courageously Speaking, we sit down with Maria Cabande—Senior Manager of Raiderettes The Studio, global cheer ambassador, and cultural advocate—to explore how embracing your identity, learning through failure, and leaning into community can unlock a powerful sense of purpose.

From once hiding her Filipino American roots to becoming a leading voice for AAPI visibility in the NFL and beyond, Maria shares her journey from elite cheerleader to boardroom boss. She opens up about facing imposter syndrome, navigating leadership in unexpected spaces, and using failure as a teacher. If you’ve ever questioned your worth, feared standing out, or struggled to find your place, Maria’s story will remind you that you already belong—you just have to believe it.

This podcast is produced by Courage Creatives and filmed at the PHLV Radio podcast studio. 

Disclaimer: The views, information, and opinions expressed in this broadcast are intended for general informational purposes only. They do not constitute professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Listeners are encouraged to consult qualified professionals regarding any specific concerns or decisions. Neither the hosts nor guests are liable for any actions taken based on the content of this program.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
On this episode of Courageously Speaking, we welcome an incredible
force in the world of sports leadership and community empowerment.
From cheerleader to business leader, Maria Commande's story is one
of the lentless courage, stepping into the unknown, breaking barriers
and shaping spaces where people can thrive. Born into a

(00:23):
Filipino American family in San Francisco and raised in Las Vegas,
Maria's journey began in the cheer indiance industry, where she
quickly rose from coaching middle schoolers to leading powerhouse university
programs at Loyola Marymount University and UCLA. She didn't just coach,
she competed at the highest level, representing Team USA on

(00:47):
the international stage and winning gold across continents. As a
global ambassador for cheerleading, she helped build the sport in
countries around the world, proving them and purpose.

Speaker 2 (01:01):
Can create real change.

Speaker 1 (01:04):
Today, Maria is the senior manager of ritarets To Studio,
a dynamic hub she launched in twenty twenty two that
brings together Las Vegas, Raid Nation, danters and families in
a space dedicated to movement, empowerment, and connection. Her commitment

(01:24):
to fostering inclusive spaces doesn't stop there. As the vice
president of PAYS, an Asian American Pacific Islander employee resource
group she co founded, she's making history, curating events like
the first ever Chinese Lunar New Year celebration at the
Las Vegas Super Bowl, and creating new opportunities for diverse

(01:48):
voices to be heard. Maria is now expanding her reach
into entrepreneurship with the Oil Baron, a food venture she
co founded with her fiance, Scott Mca, blending tradition and
innovation into something entirely new. Maria's journey is one of
transformation from athlete to leader, from coach to entrepreneur. Welcome

(02:11):
to courageously speaking Maria.

Speaker 3 (02:13):
Thank you, Maria. I'm so excited to be here with
you today.

Speaker 2 (02:16):
That was pretty long introduction, was that?

Speaker 3 (02:18):
Okay? That was perfect?

Speaker 2 (02:20):
Okay? Good good good.

Speaker 4 (02:20):
Well.

Speaker 1 (02:21):
I call this question from pomp pomps to boardrooms because
you went from being a competitive cheerleader to leading business
operations for major organizations. Now with the Raiders, it's a
big deal and I just was wondering, what is that
secret of yours? How did you reinvent yourself and thrive

(02:43):
in a completely different industry because you were an athlete.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
You still are Ray.

Speaker 3 (02:50):
Was ex athlete, but thank you, I'll take it.

Speaker 1 (02:53):
And then now you're doing business operations. Yes, that's very
you reinvent yourself.

Speaker 4 (03:00):
Oh man, this is such a fun question because I
never looked at it that way. I just feel like
my life has been an evolution, like you described it,
from like one side of the world to the other.
And one thing that has truly helped me understand my
path and my career and evolve with it is self awareness.

(03:20):
That's one thing that's my major tool in life. Just
connecting to who I am, Understanding who I am, being
confident and comfortable with who I am has really helped
me go from like somewhere where maybe I was a
cheerleader and athlete to now I'm in boardrooms having meetings
with these very important people who I feel like I
don't have a place in this room with them, but

(03:41):
actually like that self awareness and that confidence that I
instill in myself has allowed me to feel comfortable in
those rooms today.

Speaker 1 (03:48):
Question, So, how do you have that confidence, because I
think it's quite hard.

Speaker 3 (03:54):
Yes, it's hard to feel that.

Speaker 1 (03:56):
So this has something to do with your cheerleading days
that you this confident. Because I speak with a lot
of people, even people with certain titles, they get really scared.
They don't even want to be in a podcast because
I'm just scared in talking. Why are you getting that confidence?

Speaker 3 (04:13):
Thank you for thinking I have so much confidence. I do.

Speaker 4 (04:17):
I'm very confident with myself. However, I do think it's
a very human experience to get nervous and to get scared,
and I appreciate that about myself because I think I've
had so much practice, whether it's been in cheerleading, physically
performing in front of a crowd for the first time,
maybe on a small scale to a large scale across

(04:38):
the world, it really pushes you and helps you learn
how to grow in certain areas. And I think just
doing that repetitively there and then now in business has
really pushed me to find that confidence naturally.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
So when you were a child, were you this confident
or it took time for you to feel that.

Speaker 4 (04:56):
I think that I was always an extrovert, Always an extrovert.
I always wanted to talk to people. I can't stop talking.
I honestly can't stop talking. My fiances like, just please
stop talking.

Speaker 2 (05:10):
But we're to see.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Yeah, I know, and I love that watching it's like
totally she's.

Speaker 4 (05:15):
Just say yes, yes, so I can't stop talking. But
it's been a good thing because I've been able to
grow a network, and I think that's all it is,
is relationship building. So yes, I think I've been this
way ever since I was a little kid.

Speaker 2 (05:30):
And I think it's the Filipina jeans.

Speaker 3 (05:32):
Oh yes.

Speaker 4 (05:33):
I mean my dad is from the Philippines and he
is the most outlandish person, so I probably get it
from him.

Speaker 2 (05:40):
What does that mean, like outlandish.

Speaker 4 (05:43):
He's a very outspoken, proud Filipino man. He's just cloud,
he's loud, he's definitely a go getter. And I think
just you know, you growing up, maybe you don't always
want to be like one parent or the other, but
as you watch them grow up, the people that are
around you, you just get influenced by.

Speaker 3 (06:02):
And I think that's a big part of who I am.

Speaker 1 (06:05):
And I think we should thank dad, Yes, thank you,
don I do love you, because it's like very important
in being you know, Filipino American, that parental guidance is
really very important. Okay, and in fact, for our next question,
you know, it's like coaching elite athletes. It requires three

(06:27):
things number one discipline, number two strategy, and number three motivations.
So it's like running a business. So now that you
have your own business, what lessons from your cheer career
have given you the edge and running your own business?

Speaker 4 (06:42):
Oh, two things that stand out to me right away
from this question going back to actually my last answer
is the relationship building communication has really helped me. So
in sureleading your communicating with your body, right, you communicate
with your words as well, but there are times where
you have to use physics with your partner. So you
need someone to throw you up, and then you need

(07:04):
to be somebody that goes up in the air.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
I was in the air. We are so the same.

Speaker 4 (07:10):
I was.

Speaker 1 (07:13):
A true leader when I was in elementary school and
then element in high school.

Speaker 2 (07:17):
Oh so you know.

Speaker 4 (07:17):
All about it because I'm small, Yes, and I hated that.
I always wanted to be the one lifting, but we're
It never worked out for me, it was not in
my card.

Speaker 3 (07:27):
So yes, So I think.

Speaker 4 (07:29):
Like verbally or physically, you're always communicating with your partner.
Went to dip, when to stand up? At what speed
you need that to be at? And so I got
really good at kind of reading people without them having
to speak. And I think I also got really good
at communicating what I was going to do without speaking
to the person, kind of like you know, making eye contact.
Like so it's like non verbal nonble cues yes exactly.

(07:52):
And I think that's like something that probably doesn't always
get talked about in business is in sales, and in
business you're working with others, whether it's customers or whether
you're trying to make a partner. And I think having
that connection of physical connection and eye contact is really
important for business. And then the second thing I would
say is just working really hard making sure that you're

(08:15):
doing things with good intention. And I think in cheerleading,
like it was my life. It was all I cared
to do. I didn't want to have a job. My
parents were like, you're gonna have to stop cheerleading someday.
Then I never stopped cheerleading, because here I still am today. Ye.

Speaker 3 (08:29):
But I feel like one thing for me is cheerleading.

Speaker 4 (08:31):
Taught me hard work, and my family taught me hard
work too. But I think cheerleading you have to keep
trying and trying again because it's such a skill that
you really have to keep working at, at least from
my experience, to get good at. And it took me
a long time to really understand that. And so once
I finally broke through that, I kind of understood that
if you work hard enough at something, and if you

(08:53):
just keep applying yourself, that you could get really.

Speaker 3 (08:56):
Good at that thing that you're working towards.

Speaker 1 (08:58):
Yes, and in cheer, I remember falling yes and not
just one no, not just one many times too many times.
And it's like in business, you're going to fall making mistakes.
And you know, I have my own business as well,
and it's not easy.

Speaker 4 (09:15):
No, And so you understand that part of that, like
you're saying mistakes is embarrassing yourself. Sometimes it's going to
feel awkward, it's going to feel cringe, it's going to
feel like you're doing it wrong. You're scared people are
going to make fun of you, or like wondering why
you're doing that. And I think the difference between somebody
who is starting a business or has their own business

(09:36):
and somebody who doesn't is the person that has their
business is willing to put themselves in an uncomfortab position
so that they can learn and grow and potentially become successful.

Speaker 2 (09:45):
That's so true. And I think that it also hurts
when you fall.

Speaker 3 (09:49):
Yes, right, Yeah, it doesn't feel good.

Speaker 2 (09:51):
And it's a business owner.

Speaker 1 (09:52):
A lot of people think that, oh, I'm going to
be a business owner, so I can be my own boss,
which is true, you be your own boss. But are
you a boss too to yourself? And also when it
comes to the pens of being a business owner, especially
when you're new, who will believe in you?

Speaker 3 (10:09):
Yes, you have to believe in yourself and many, many at.

Speaker 1 (10:13):
Times we can't even believe in ourselves because failure doesn't
taste good.

Speaker 2 (10:18):
No, it hurts, and it bruises you.

Speaker 4 (10:21):
Yeah, and that's a really good point. If you for
the first time, you make a mistake, or you lose
a deal, or something just doesn't work in the favor
that you were hoping that it was going to go in,
it's really hard to get up from that for the
first time. But the more you put yourself in that position,
like we just spoke about, the more comfortable you get
with failure, which only helps you grow and lead you

(10:42):
to the position that you want to be in.

Speaker 2 (10:44):
Yeah, I have this philosophy.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
If you want to be a business owner, you better
be comfortable with failure and you got to feel fast.

Speaker 3 (10:54):
That's so.

Speaker 2 (10:55):
Don't you think if you fail quickly, you'll learn quickly. Yes,
if you wait.

Speaker 1 (11:01):
Oh, I'm going to pretend I'm not failing. I'm just
gonna like fake it till I make it. I like
fake it till I make it. But it needs to
not be the only story in your entrepreneurship journey, because
if you're faking it all the time, it means to
say that you're not putting the effort to be great
at way you do right, So it should be in

(11:22):
your first day the next time you should be I'm
going to make a lot of changes so that I
can be better. I'm going to take risks that maybe
most people outside of the organization might think.

Speaker 2 (11:35):
Sorry for the term that stupid. Yes, but you still
do it.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
And I think you and I were a Philippines, you know,
Filipino Americans and in the Philippines, I think there is
this just amazing effort to continue to do good things
even when it's hard. The blood, sweat and tears is
actually real. You know, having your own business, you know,

(12:04):
also juggling with your family.

Speaker 2 (12:06):
Now you know you're getting married?

Speaker 3 (12:08):
Is that okay? That shared? I'm getting married. I'm getting
married and I'm really excited.

Speaker 2 (12:15):
And where is it gonna be?

Speaker 4 (12:16):
So we're going to get married in Kona in May,
and then we're going to come back here and have
a wedding reception with all our friends and family.

Speaker 2 (12:23):
That is super exciting. Why you So.

Speaker 4 (12:27):
I actually have never been to where we're gonna go
get married. But Scott's family lives there part time, and
my grandma lives there part time as well. So I
grew up going to Hawaii every summer from Las Vegas.
My parents were like, you're not allowed to stay home
on spring break without me at home.

Speaker 3 (12:43):
You're gonna go with your grandma. At I got sent away,
And I.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
Think, like Hawaii is like lots of Filipinos in there.

Speaker 3 (12:50):
Lots of Filipinos.

Speaker 4 (12:51):
And actually I grew up here and when I moved here,
there's not really a lot of Asian people, not a
lot of Filipinos. And when I as I continued live
through here, this ended up being the ninth Island for
Hawaii because a lot of people would move.

Speaker 2 (13:07):
From Hawaii about what's nine Island.

Speaker 4 (13:09):
The ninth island because there's eight islands in Hawaii and
for some reason, and I'm not sure why, I should
probably look into this, but people from Hawaii love when
they moved to the mainland.

Speaker 3 (13:19):
They love to move to Las Vegas.

Speaker 4 (13:21):
And I'm happy for it because now we have so
much Hawaiian and Filipino and Asian Japanese culture here that
we wouldn't have had if all of the Hawaiians didn't
tell all their family members, no, move to Las Vegas.

Speaker 3 (13:31):
It's great, Yes, so that.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
That's really cool. But I'm excited for you.

Speaker 3 (13:36):
Thank you so much. I really appreciate.

Speaker 2 (13:38):
It's a lot of new things for you. You know, you're.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
Holding the business operations for you know, Radarets to studio,
have your own business with Scott with Scott, and then
now getting.

Speaker 2 (13:52):
Married to Scott.

Speaker 4 (13:53):
I know, it's so many things, and I'm you know,
my wheels are always turning. I make fun of myself
and my own had to because I always have these
random ideas, Like right now, I have an idea in
my head that is for you know, the next two years.
But I'm going to do a little research over the
next two years before i start putting into fruition. But yeah,
so many things at once, and I like to stay busy,

(14:15):
just like you're saying Filipino people, they love to stay busy.

Speaker 3 (14:17):
And I don't know what tired is.

Speaker 4 (14:19):
Yes, I'm always tired, but it doesn't matter because I
just keep like, I'm just so excited for life. I
think one thing is like, I'm really grateful to be
able to have like the things that I have. And
that's even just like having a house, having food, having
clean water, having clothes, being able to have communication like this.

Speaker 3 (14:39):
That's a blessing.

Speaker 4 (14:39):
And so some days when it gets really hard, as
a business owner or anybody just a human in life,
when life feels hard, that's a good reminder and a
gratitude practice for me. Back to the self awareness is
we have so many good things, and if you have
the ability to do it, go do it. And then
I can tack that onto representing my community at the
same time.

Speaker 1 (14:59):
Yes, and I think, you know, being grateful, that's a
word that we use a lot, being thankful as Filipinos
and as Filipino Americans. I am grateful to be able
to call myself Filipino American. I moved here when I
was twenty one years old.

Speaker 3 (15:13):
Wow, and I bet that was really fun.

Speaker 2 (15:16):
Yes, did you know that you needed.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
To be twenty one when you live?

Speaker 1 (15:20):
No, it's just that you know when you're getting the
what do you call it? That my mom sponsored me
to come here. Yeah, she's you a citizen, but I'm not.
So you have to apply for your visa and green
card all that. It just so happened. I'm turning twenty
one and I need it. Imagine I would have waited

(15:41):
like one more decade.

Speaker 3 (15:43):
I know.

Speaker 2 (15:44):
I prayed so much to do.

Speaker 1 (15:46):
I prayed for a whole year to be able to
make it here. God, I'll be a nice person. Yeah,
even a nicer than what I do know if I
come to.

Speaker 3 (15:55):
America, if I can go to.

Speaker 1 (15:56):
America, I actually I'm not sure if you believe in
really like manifesting.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
But I wrote down schools I'm gonna go to. I'm
gonna go to you and LV.

Speaker 1 (16:08):
I'm gonna, you know, have this job. And my classmates
were asking me, what are you doing there? Midi Nisa
is like my name there, everybody's Maria here, Yes, so
Maria Marinisa, So they call me Midnisa. What are you
doing all the time? Writing and doodling? And and I said,
I'm doodling my life. This is gonna be I'm going
to be in the United States of America.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
I love that.

Speaker 4 (16:29):
That is amazing. And look at you, like your life
is amazing. Here you are interviewing people. You're like living
your dream. And that's amazing because if you think back
to like being twenty one in that position, those days
when it felt probably hard and scary and uncertain, that
feeling is like part of.

Speaker 3 (16:48):
Your life and now you get to enjoy like what
you do today.

Speaker 1 (16:51):
And the thing is, it's funny because I was scared,
Like I spoke English back in the days in the Philippines,
but I was not comfortable with it. I still have
my moments when you hear in my podcast I slip
a word here and there, it's like I didn't pronounce
it correctly.

Speaker 2 (17:06):
I think, thank you, but you know BSL.

Speaker 1 (17:10):
And it's like, oh, like at first embarrassing, but I
have embraced like being Filipino American. And the thing is,
I think it's very important to note that it's okay
to be imperfect and also know that you can't be alone.
Around six months, I wanted to go back home to
the Philippines because I was sad. You know, it was

(17:32):
hard to get a job. Or when I got a job,
I didn't feel that I belonged because I came here
as an adult, not as you know, a kid.

Speaker 2 (17:43):
It's very hard to lends.

Speaker 1 (17:47):
Yes, and what happened was because of community. Okay, because
of community, I stayed. I found great friends or in
the Filipino community that embraced who I am. You know,
we served in church together, we you know, fed the
homeless together and things like that. And I felt part, like,

(18:08):
part of my success is never just me, like I'm
thinka for you know, thank you to Kuya PHLV radio
for you know.

Speaker 2 (18:14):
When I was just starting.

Speaker 1 (18:16):
When I was starting, so I was in corporate world,
I started singing again. I remember being invited by PHLV
radio to you know, introduce my own song. So all
of these things when you said, you know, look at
you now, look at me now because of the people
that helped me. And that's the community that believed in

(18:36):
me when it's very hard to believe in myself.

Speaker 4 (18:39):
Yes, oh my gosh, that resonates with me so much.
But I love your story because it's so real. I
think that that's a hard thing to go through, and
I want to know more about the experience of moving
from the Philippines to America. I'm honestly, I'm going to
be very transparent, but I really never even had interest

(19:01):
in learning about my own culture and my own background
because of what you're saying. I was embarrassed when I
first moved to Las Vegas from San Francisco.

Speaker 3 (19:10):
There's not a lot of Asian people yet.

Speaker 4 (19:12):
And I made a friend in elementary school and she
asked me where I was from, and I said San
Francisco and she said, no, where are you from from?
And I was like, oh, I got what she was saying.
And she I said I was Filipino. And she was like,
what is that? Is that for an exchange student? And
at my age, I didn't know what that meant yet.
So I went home to tell my parents, and you know,
they seemed they laughed about it, but they're like, oh,

(19:34):
my gosh, we are not in the Bay anymore. We're
not in Philippines. So that was a really I was
at that age. I guess I was old enough to
analyze what that made me feel like, which was I
guess maybe that was a bad thing that I was
Filipino or not looking like everybody else. So then I
kind of hit that part of me for a long time.
You can only hide so much, right because I'm brown, Yeah,

(19:56):
and you can obviously tell in Filipino, but you can
hide things with like the way that you speak, the
things that you do. And I think that just carried
me through my adulthood because majority of my life in
La in my twenties, I was surrounded with a lot
of white people and that was like my environment, and
I loved everybody that I was around. They welcomed me.

(20:17):
I felt really comfortable there. But I knew that when
I had moved to Las Vegas that I was going
to have an opportunity to really connect with my community,
my background, and when I took the leap to move
back home after a decade, I just really was interested
in exploring that part of my life. So I'm really
happy to be sitting here with you today and being
so involved in my community.

Speaker 3 (20:36):
Today.

Speaker 1 (20:36):
I'm super excited because you're not part of the community.
You visited PHLV radio, Yes today, it's so cool here
and we're gonna apool Studio Filipino Town yeah soon.

Speaker 2 (20:48):
So that's really good.

Speaker 1 (20:49):
And I think embracing your identity as a Filipino American is.

Speaker 2 (20:54):
Very important to you. Are a proud Filipina.

Speaker 1 (20:56):
I am proud born in a United States, that's right,
in a multicultural environment. So describe both the challenges and
beauty of being Filipino American.

Speaker 2 (21:07):
We already started that earlier, but you know, expound more.

Speaker 1 (21:10):
What are the challenges of being Filipino American and the.

Speaker 2 (21:14):
Beauty that comes with it?

Speaker 4 (21:15):
Oh man, this is a heavy question, I feel like
because the challenges for me that I experienced, that is like,
I think that was such a major part of my life,
even though it happened so early on when I was
asked if it was a foreign exchange student, and then
that's because it stuck with me basically all the way
until I was thirty. That's a major life like a

(21:37):
part of me that I'm hiding. So that was like
my biggest challenge with being Filipino American is that I
really truly couldn't be myself fully.

Speaker 3 (21:46):
And you know, you get to choose who.

Speaker 4 (21:48):
You get to be as you go through your twenties,
go through your thirties, right, You're trying to figure out
who you are and making yourself fit into these places
that you want to be and be represented. But I
think think that what was difficult was that I didn't
really like welcome that part of me and so now
here in Las Vegas. I think one thing that's beautiful
about being Filipino American is that I think we're so passionate.

Speaker 3 (22:12):
You know.

Speaker 4 (22:12):
I think everyone every Filipino I've ever met is not shy.
They are so passionate in whatever that it is that
they love. And I think now turning myself to the
community that I belong to and my heritage and my
family makes me really proud, and I think it's just
a beautiful thing.

Speaker 3 (22:28):
Plus everybody loves our food.

Speaker 2 (22:30):
Yes, of course it's the beauty When you see Filipino
lumpia and punts.

Speaker 3 (22:34):
It, I know everybody knows what it is now and
it's like, wow, how do you know that?

Speaker 2 (22:38):
That's really good? But it's courageously speaking. So I'm gonna
be a little deep.

Speaker 1 (22:43):
So when you said that you were embarrassed earlier, I
want to really ask you about it. Why was it
embarrassing to just say, hey, I'm Filipino American or the
Filipino Why?

Speaker 4 (22:55):
And you know what, I think that's the most confusing part,
because embarrassing has a connotation of a negative No.

Speaker 1 (23:04):
Like you was it because did we have a negative
connotation when you say Filipinos? Or because we don't they
don't exist like many Like I know we're in the map,
but yeah, maybe during that time there were not a
lot of Filipinos.

Speaker 2 (23:21):
What's the reasons?

Speaker 4 (23:22):
I think as a kid and even as an adult
to this day, we all just want to fit in, right,
We all want to feel comfortable, feel safe, And I
feel I think that people feel safe and comfortable when
they're with people that like know what they've experienced and
understand them, because you and I can sit down at
a table together and eat Filipino food and enjoy it

(23:44):
and I don't have to ask you what is this?
Oh what's that and make a way.

Speaker 2 (23:48):
With them unique.

Speaker 4 (23:51):
Yes, she made in that moment, and this is I
guess in my head for whatever reason that I just
felt a little bit isolated and I didn't realize I
was different until that comment was made and I was like, oh,
I'm different and this is a new place. And then
I didn't realize I'd be different forever because I stopped
growing at four seven, So.

Speaker 3 (24:10):
I was like, Okay, I'm not gonna be different forever.
I guess same, I'm small.

Speaker 1 (24:15):
Yes, So I think that when you talked about the
beauty of being a Filipino American, that being passionate. I
think that's one of the reasons why, you know, being
in a non dominant group. You know, in psychology and sociology,
if you are a minority, you're in a non dominant group,

(24:37):
and you're feeling like an outsider. Even if maybe you
have nice friends and people, it's not their fault that
they're not they're in the dominant group and you're in
the non dominant group. What helped you get out of that?
From different to I'm going to embraceaus Now you said

(24:58):
you co founded pace right and you're so passionate that
the AAPI community, which is the Asian American Pacific Islander community.

Speaker 2 (25:08):
So what happened?

Speaker 1 (25:10):
Where did the transition happen from I'm embarrassed of being
Filipino American because I'm you know, feeling too unique?

Speaker 3 (25:17):
Yes too now an advocate.

Speaker 4 (25:21):
You know, I think when I do things, I do
them at full fource without knowing it, and it goes
back to being passionate Filipinos right, and I think that
everything that I put my time into right now, I
want to do it at one hundred percent. I don't
want to hold back. I don't want to do it
just to fill time. I want to do it for

(25:44):
whatever reasons developed that may come in front of me.

Speaker 3 (25:47):
I don't really know.

Speaker 4 (25:48):
Why I decided to join PACE when I came to
the readers when it first was started, but it felt
like the right thing to do, to surround myself with
people that are like minded and have similarities to me,
and so I think just it's something that was in
front of me. I took it and I was like,
I want to be one hundred percent in this. I

(26:08):
once I got once I got to know everybody in
my group, I heard their stories, and we have people
that work for the Readers that are from the Philippines.

Speaker 3 (26:16):
Really the speak to Gallog. Yes, we have a large group.

Speaker 4 (26:20):
We have about sixty members in our group and a
majority of them are Filipinos.

Speaker 2 (26:24):
So what does PAY stand for?

Speaker 4 (26:26):
Pacific Asian Community and Equity?

Speaker 2 (26:29):
So Pacific Asian what's the same.

Speaker 3 (26:32):
Community and equity?

Speaker 2 (26:34):
Yeah, that's really good.

Speaker 3 (26:35):
It's a mouthful.

Speaker 4 (26:36):
Yeah, Okay, we actually changed the name once because it
was even longer before.

Speaker 2 (26:40):
But I like it. It's like the pace.

Speaker 1 (26:42):
And you know what I love about our conversation today
is that you are being truthful.

Speaker 2 (26:47):
You could have just said like, oh, yeah, I've always.

Speaker 1 (26:50):
Been proud of who I am in my heritage, but
here you are, people are going to see you. I
was like, oh, I thought she's so passionate and didn't
know that she ever felt that way. But most people,
there's something called process of a culturation. Right, we're in,
You've got to learn the new culture. And I teach
this at you and l V. One of the things

(27:12):
that I teach us, like the U curve hypothesis. We're
in the first part is you feel at home. You
feel at home and like being in the United States
as somebody who moved from the Philippines. I felt at home.

Speaker 2 (27:26):
Oh, I'm so excited, I'm going to McDonald's. I'm going
to Charleston, you know.

Speaker 1 (27:31):
And then you feel hostile, hostile or hostile how do
you pronounce it?

Speaker 2 (27:36):
Hostile?

Speaker 1 (27:38):
So you feel hostile, feeling that you don't belong because
I didn't have friends and I felt like, why did
I go to another country? It's such a mistake because
just so you know, I traded my degree. I was
missing my research paper thesis is that last semester or

(28:01):
I have to go to America. I chose the green card.
Oh wow, I didn't get my degree completely. I had
it five years of school, but I didn't get the diploma.

Speaker 4 (28:11):
That is such a hard decision to make at the
age of twenty one.

Speaker 1 (28:15):
Yes, and that's why I felt hostile, because I felt
like it was like an internal battle, like this the
right decision, and it wasn't like you know, I was like,
is this the life that I wanted?

Speaker 2 (28:25):
I felt like I had another.

Speaker 1 (28:28):
Idea of the United States, right, And then I felt
some sort of humor.

Speaker 2 (28:33):
I was like, what am I like? When I had France,
It's like, I love this life. I have a lot
of friends.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
Now what was I thinking that I'm suffering? You know,
I have so many talk that decision. I made that
decision because I've always had this spirit of gratefulness. When
I looked back, life was hard back home, and there's
not a lot of opportunities as opposed to hear there
are opportunities there, but for somebody like me that may

(29:02):
not have graduated in the number one school in the Philippines.
It's harder to maybe get a job or do what
I really wanted to do in America. Here in Las
Vegas specifically, I'm thankful to Las Vegas. By the way,
you know why why Las Vegas gives a chance to everyone.
Oh yes, I didn't finish college, but I got a job.

(29:26):
And when I got a job, that job put me
through school, and I get emotional. That job paid for
my bachelor's degree, and then my next job paid for
my master's degree and so on and so forth.

Speaker 3 (29:39):
Congratulations, this is your path.

Speaker 4 (29:42):
That one decision you made when you're twenty one just
like completely changed your life, and it was exactly what
was waiting for you, and you had no idea even
when you're struggling with that was at the right decision.

Speaker 2 (29:53):
You know, And that's courage.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
You know, you're willing to trade for like for long
like short term for long term. And then the last
part is I felt at home.

Speaker 2 (30:01):
I've been here for.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
Twenty years, so I'm now forty one years old, and
I am just like thankful for being at home. So
from feeling that, oh I'm so excited to hostile to
humor and and now it's I feel at home in
this country and I feel like I belong. And when
I got my US citizenship, I'm telling you, it's the

(30:25):
best thing.

Speaker 2 (30:26):
I cried. Yeah, I cried when.

Speaker 3 (30:29):
I became a US an accomplishment.

Speaker 2 (30:32):
Yes, one month before my birthday, so, which is great.

Speaker 3 (30:35):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (30:35):
I mean it was probably a scary time in life,
trying to figure out all these things that were laying
ahead of you and behind you. It's just life is
so confusing for everybody, and I think it's important to
come back to like we're all just human trying to
figure it out. But with that specific background, like you
had a hard path, you had hard decisions to make,

(30:57):
and now here you are in your position that you are,
and it's like you can only be grateful.

Speaker 1 (31:02):
Right, Yes, And that's why being grateful, I think is
something that you should have if you want to be courageous, Yes,
you can't be courageous if you're not grateful, No, because
you can't take the risk. If you're scared that something's
going to hurt you, or there's really nothing to be
grateful for, you're just going to stop there. Yeah, And

(31:23):
I think it's really important to self examine. So self awareness.
I think you and I both talked about this the
first time we met. But having awareness is so important
because you can't if you don't assess yourself in your
current situation, no matter what it is, you really can't
be grateful, you know, And I think that's part of
also confidence building, is you can't be confident unless you're courageous.

(31:45):
You know, courageous means being brave, And in order for
you to become brave, you have to take chances, and
you have to be faced with uncertainty and the unknown.
And before that, you have to be in a position
that's scary and hard. And then that's when you can
self ass and be like, Okay, I need to make
a decision here, And that's how you be courageous.

Speaker 2 (32:04):
Yes, I love that. I love that.

Speaker 1 (32:06):
And in our next question, I know you've built a
career that is constantly evolving, right so from sports to
corporate life and now to entrepreneurship. So, okay, what is
the most painful part of choosing to be courageous and
what helped you push through? Because I shared a little
bit of mind, So for you, what's the most painful
part of being courageous for you.

Speaker 4 (32:29):
This is a really good question, and there's so many
parts of my life that I would say have been
painful that I experienced. But I think with the overarching
fame of our conversation really resonates with the answer for
this question is I feel like, man, I feel like

(32:52):
I've had some hard days throughout my life, and you know,
I am still grateful for everything that I have, but
those hard days are what make you experience challenge and
even though that feels really difficult, it's at those moments
where you have to face yourself and say like, I'm
going to get past this, I'm going to move forward,

(33:14):
and it's going to turn into a lesson. And so
for me, I think the hardest part about being courageous
is just being faced with those hard moments in life.
It's when you feel the most down about yourself.

Speaker 1 (33:24):
It's when you feel like you so just you know,
Maria caa bonde like world renowned cheerleader thing works for
the Raiders, thank.

Speaker 2 (33:35):
You, and she has those times too.

Speaker 4 (33:38):
Of course everybody does, and if they don't say that
they do, it's a lie. Because you don't get yourself
to certain positions without putting yourself through those hard times
and then getting out of them.

Speaker 3 (33:51):
You really can't do that.

Speaker 4 (33:52):
And I, you know, I don't really see myself and
maybe I don't have as much confidence as IM saying,
but I feel like I don't want I read my
resume and you know what you just said right now,
thank you, But it doesn't feel like that. I feel
like a normal person. I just feel like I'm just
trying to build community, make friends, feel love, give love,
figure out something for myself, make my parents proud, make

(34:15):
myself proud. And I think that is just very cuman.
And so yes, of course I have hard days and
of course I feel not confident.

Speaker 1 (34:23):
Also, so let me ask you this, give me an
example of something hard you had to face and I
had to be courageous, like something you know, it doesn't
have to be now or like recently, could be from before.

Speaker 4 (34:37):
Well, I really struggled. Oh I might get emotional, It's okay.

Speaker 3 (34:42):
I really struggled with.

Speaker 4 (34:46):
Believing in myself and like knowing that my life was
gonna be okay because I went through a depression in
twenty seventeen. Yes, wow, okay, And I never have been
through therapy before A verbal talk therapy, and I actually
started therapy. So in twenty seventeen, I went through one

(35:06):
full year where I didn't work out at all, and
that was like my clear red flag, like something is
seriously wrong, and then I would take naps before everything
I had to do. I had like four jobs at
the time, because in California you have to have a
million jobs to survey.

Speaker 1 (35:19):
Yeah it's expensive, thousand dollars for one bedroom apartment, right
it was.

Speaker 4 (35:24):
It is so like today that's probably very true, but
back then it wasn't. It wasn't that bad, but it
was still very non spence and I was not making
any money.

Speaker 3 (35:32):
But I had four.

Speaker 4 (35:32):
Jobs and I was just so tired, and so finally
I put myself into therapy. It was a big decision.
I didn't know what it went. My parents did not
want me to go to therapy. They're like, you don't
need that, right being from Filipino culture, Like that's not
something that was comfortable in my household. So I went
through that hard period where I had to do a
lot of growing and going inside, turning in and learning

(35:58):
tools that were going to help take me through my
life and put me where I am today. And I
think truly without therapy. And I think and I don't
think that therapy is necessary for everybody, but I think
it was necessary for me because I struggled so hard emotionally.
I'm really sensitive, I'm really emotional, and that was always
a negative thing for me growing up from my family
and like my surroundings.

Speaker 3 (36:18):
Oh my voice is crackling.

Speaker 2 (36:19):
And it's okay.

Speaker 4 (36:21):
Yeah, it's such a real conversation and I love that
about you and speaking, Yeah, speaking, we have to be
brave right in these moments. And yeah, So that was
a really difficult time for me, and I'm so happy
I got past it. And it's a scary, it's a reminder.
It's like a tattoo almost, like I'll never forget that
part of my life and how difficult it actually was,

(36:42):
and that like, I just want to fight. I just
want to keep fighting to be able to like live
a happy lifestyle. But in order to do that, I
need to make sure I have self awareness and the
tools that I've learned along the way to put me
in those positions.

Speaker 1 (36:55):
Yes, and I think that it's good to know that,
especially back in the day's mental health it's not as accepted.

Speaker 2 (37:03):
It's a taboo. Yes, don't you think?

Speaker 1 (37:05):
And I think a lot of people think that if
I go to therapy, something must be wrong with me. Yes,
if you ever felt that when you're going through this depression.

Speaker 3 (37:15):
I think about that question every day. Something's wrong.

Speaker 1 (37:19):
And even though a lot of people look at us,
it's like we're accomplished, you know, but at the end
of the day, we're human.

Speaker 2 (37:25):
Yes, everyone I know.

Speaker 1 (37:27):
I have friends or entrepreneurs making millions of dollars.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
They would send a text.

Speaker 1 (37:33):
I'm not feeling well and they go through therapy and
they have to hide it, kind of like you. I'm embarrassed,
so not being Felpino American. I'm embarrassed because I'm such
a successful person, yet I'm going to therapy and that something's.

Speaker 2 (37:48):
Wrong with me. I would have a disease.

Speaker 1 (37:50):
And I always tell people we cannot choose our circumstances
that actually make us feel things, but we can choose
what to do with it.

Speaker 2 (38:02):
The problem. Do we have the tools?

Speaker 1 (38:04):
How is it that for twelve fifteen years we go
to school to learn how to do a great job
for our careers, but we never go to school to
find out how to live a more fulfilled life on
how to live happily and how to choose better, how
to communicate, how to love, yes, how to have relationships.

Speaker 2 (38:26):
We don't go to school for that.

Speaker 4 (38:28):
That's such an important topic. I wish that there were
schools for that. There probably are schools from that maybe
now with podcasts. Yeah, you know, that's a big part
of it is listening to people's stories, being able to
connect and resonate with other people's you know, achievements or
failures or experiences.

Speaker 2 (38:45):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (38:45):
And then I think that since we don't have the tools,
that's when therapy comes in. Not because again you're less
than or something's wrong with you. It's because, just like
when you were young, when you have to have your
parents or your aunties and aditos had so that you
can walk, you need sometimes a professional to guide you

(39:08):
through those negative emotions. And I want to talk about
this negative emotions. A lot of people don't like negative emotions.
I never liked them as a feeler. We don't want
negative emotions because we cry easily.

Speaker 4 (39:20):
Yes, and I don't want to cry, and crying means
we're weak, yes, not we're healing.

Speaker 2 (39:27):
I think that.

Speaker 1 (39:28):
So. Have you ever watched this movie called inside out I.

Speaker 2 (39:36):
Picture or something like that.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
And this is the first time I've ever felt that
negative emotions are actually there for a reason, because negative
emotions allows us to give you an example, if I'm
a singer on the side, if I sing and I
wasn't nervous a little bit like.

Speaker 2 (39:57):
Like an hour ago, just do okay.

Speaker 1 (40:01):
But if I was a little nervous like ten percent,
I'm gonna be so good because I bring in me
that art that sometimes.

Speaker 3 (40:10):
I feeling, that deep gut feeling.

Speaker 1 (40:13):
You know, as an artist, our goal is to make
people feel things.

Speaker 2 (40:17):
And it doesn't mean like just make you happy.

Speaker 1 (40:19):
But do you know that a lot of the songs
that I write is because I want people to feel things,
the negative feelings that they can't. They can't even cry.
Most men can't cry. Even women can't cry because it's wrong.
That's what people say, that you're weak, that's why you cry. Yes,
But I want them when I write music, I want
them to feel something, not negative, but to release those emotions,

(40:43):
you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (40:45):
Another thing is anger.

Speaker 1 (40:46):
Anger is not necessarily bad if it protects you from.

Speaker 2 (40:51):
Maybe being abused.

Speaker 1 (40:52):
Yes, yeah, I'm not saying to have chronic anger, chronic depression,
not But you have to respect negative emotions just as
much as you respect being happy, joyful, and fulfilled, because
how can you know the difference between sad and happy
when you've never been sad?

Speaker 4 (41:11):
Exactly exactly what I'm thinking is, it's not you don't
want to be just strong because you it's not an option.
You can't be strong without feeling, have felt what weak
feels like. You really can't, And it's unfortunate because if
if we could all just be happy, if we could
all just be strong, that would be my Yeah, that

(41:32):
would be my vote for everybody.

Speaker 3 (41:34):
But what I've learned is it's just not possible for me.

Speaker 4 (41:37):
At least that's my experience, and maybe other people have
different experiences.

Speaker 1 (41:41):
But I think now what you're saying is all of us,
and I'm telling you it doesn't matter. So a lot
of people you know ask me, because I do counsel,
I do you know, coaching on this side? And I
always tell them that even me, I get sad. There
are times I'm preparing for a show and I'm having
a meltdown to hours before a show and I have

(42:02):
to compose myself and say I'm okay to be like this.
I teach part time at the university. Two hours before
I feel so down, but my students need me. Then
I have to muster the courage to go to school
and teach while I was crying two hours ago.

Speaker 3 (42:19):
That's really hard.

Speaker 1 (42:21):
But I think when you put yourself in a situation
we're in, you accept the fact none of us, whether
you're a millionaire or you're making minimum wage, or you're
doing even the love like your dream job, you have

(42:41):
your love of your life.

Speaker 2 (42:43):
One hundred percent. Sure.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
Anyone here can try to give me a different answer.
All of us become sad at one point in our lives.

Speaker 2 (42:53):
It doesn't matter.

Speaker 4 (42:54):
I think it's a human experience and it's part of us.
The emotions that come out of us is us expressing
the words that are happening inside of our head, the
feelings that are happening in our inside of our body,
and they're coming out in a certain passionate way, whether
you express with anger or you express with crying. And
I learned that, you know, it's hard to communicate. Like

(43:16):
my fiance, he expresses with anger, and it's not a
scary anger. It's just like he gets loud, his voice raises,
He's just like.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
Any kind of the feather gets scared.

Speaker 4 (43:27):
Yeah, I mean, I just know that this is him expressing,
and my equivalent version of that is me crying. And
he also gets really confused. He's like just as confused
as I am. I'm like, why are you yelling?

Speaker 2 (43:39):
Relax?

Speaker 4 (43:40):
You need to take a deep breath, or I don't
like that emotion. He also when I'm crying, he's like,
why are you doing that? And so like understanding, like
when you have a partner and communicating that you know,
it's okay that he communicates that way, and that's how
he expresses. Don't suppress that out of somebody that you
love or anybody, because then they're gonna think it's a
bad thing to express that emotion. And really it's just

(44:02):
you're just releasing it from your body so that you
can self soothe and regulate.

Speaker 2 (44:05):
And I think that's where trust comes from.

Speaker 1 (44:08):
And I think when you are getting married very soon,
it's going to be more friction. And I got married
last year and thank you, and we're learning, Yeah, you know,
we're still learning, still loving each other ends.

Speaker 3 (44:25):
I don't think they're learning ever.

Speaker 1 (44:26):
And I think also apart from you know, relationships, Also,
there's this war in your head all the time.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
Well, if you.

Speaker 1 (44:33):
Deserve the kind of life you have, did you do
more of what is expected of you as an immigrant
for example, for me as a Filipino American. But at
the same time, what have I done in my life
that makes my life fulfilled? Because a lot of people
we can chase riches, we want to make six figures
or like seven figures, But what.

Speaker 2 (44:55):
Will make you happy?

Speaker 1 (44:56):
So my you know question for you is, if someone
googles Maria Cabonde right five years into the future, Okay,
what do you want people to see there?

Speaker 2 (45:09):
And how are you shaping your.

Speaker 1 (45:11):
Legacy now beyond the world of cheerleading and also business operations?

Speaker 4 (45:17):
Oh man, if somebody were to google me, that's a
scary thought.

Speaker 3 (45:20):
By the way, I'm like, I don't google.

Speaker 2 (45:22):
Myself, so I should probably google you, did youse? I
have to prepare, hopefully.

Speaker 3 (45:29):
Well in five years from now.

Speaker 4 (45:31):
If I were to google myself or loved one word
to google me, I guess professionally, I would want people
to see my entrepreneurial journey. I think that's what I
resonate with most I've been part time. I've been freelance,
I've been the creative, and then I've moved into more
corporate position and I'm loving it here while I'm here,
and then I think there's going to be a time

(45:52):
where I'm just always going to be have that entrepreneurial
spirit full time.

Speaker 3 (45:56):
And so I think that I.

Speaker 4 (45:59):
Hope you we'll see that it's okay to try everything,
and it's okay that your resume isn't fifty years of
one thing, and that you can be a Swiss Army
knife in your life and try all kinds of things.
And I think for personally, I would hope that people
see that I'm really invested into my family and into
my community.

Speaker 1 (46:18):
Okay, so why I love this? I love this so
much because I heard you. Oh, I want people to
you know, remember me as an entrepreneur that.

Speaker 2 (46:29):
Was courageous enough to evolve.

Speaker 1 (46:32):
Right, you're a cheerleaders or an athlete to now entrepreneur.

Speaker 2 (46:36):
But what I love about you added.

Speaker 1 (46:38):
Something really special, which is your family and community. Did
you know that there is like an eighty year old
Harvard study that said that what is the greatest predictor
of fulfillment or happiness?

Speaker 3 (46:50):
Who I'm excited for the Mkay.

Speaker 2 (46:52):
Do you think it's money.

Speaker 3 (46:54):
I definitely know it's not money. Kay.

Speaker 2 (46:56):
Do you think it is work life isolence?

Speaker 1 (47:01):
I don't even think it's that good because the answer
is connection, relationship. And a lot of people forego that,
you know, because we want to be so successful. We
forget to love because we want to be so successful.
We forget to text that friend because we want to
be so successful, so busy, we forgot to reach out

(47:24):
to our parents or to our siblings, or being part
of it, be part of the community without getting paid
for it, and just like loving the service, loving other people.
And when you try to escape life because you're so
sad about it because you know you have lots of money.
So I'm going to go on vacation to escape my

(47:45):
entrepreneur real life, something's wrong, right.

Speaker 4 (47:49):
We never have to feel like you're running away from life,
and that's so normal these days.

Speaker 3 (47:53):
People always feel like they.

Speaker 4 (47:54):
Want to go on vacation and want to get away
and need to go to dinner and have drinks, to
do whatever to feel better in that moment.

Speaker 3 (48:03):
And I still want to hear the answer. What's the
answer to that?

Speaker 1 (48:07):
So the answer is connection, having relationship. That is the
greatest predictor of happiness. Is being loved. Yeah, being being
loved and loving to being connected.

Speaker 2 (48:19):
So connection.

Speaker 1 (48:20):
So they summarize this as connection. So that's the greatest
predictor of success is connection.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
That's so wild. I think that's not the money.

Speaker 1 (48:28):
It doesn't say that. It's like, hey, you don't need
money and quit your job. Now, It's not like that.
It's it's just saying that when you there's a certain
there's a certain level of money that can get you
to you don't you know, longer get a pre like
you no longer get that dopamine hit after you're getting

(48:52):
to a certain level.

Speaker 3 (48:52):
I think it's like one hundred and fifty.

Speaker 1 (48:54):
Thousand or something, you know, I can look it up,
but I read it somewhere. It's like less than two
hundred thousand. If you hit that mark, it doesn't matter
if you make more. Yeah, if your relationship sorr. Relationships
are sucky, you have hurt a lot of people along
the way to get to where you want to be,
you're not going to be happy.

Speaker 4 (49:15):
And I think, like when you break it all the
way down, we're doing our jobs, we're working in the community.
We're raising our families, we're caring for each other, we're
trying to have a fulfilling life out here. But really
humans are just going to be human, right. We crave
that connection, We crave understanding. We had tribes back in

(49:35):
the days, yes, exactly. And so I think it's just
so funny that like history just repeats itself, and like
there's things in us that are fully ingrained for the
rest of our lives that we're never gonna have to
be able to escape. And it's just if you like
strip yourself of all those material things and you go
back to like what is really inside of you that

(49:57):
and you find it's connection. I think that's a beautiful
thing that people get to realize. And we're so lucky
that we got to figure that out now.

Speaker 2 (50:04):
For that study in line.

Speaker 1 (50:05):
And just so you know, I met I went to
Harvard last year for a conference and I met one
of the psychologists that is friends with a guy who
or the doctor that made that study. I got his card,
I never emailed him, so I gotta email him, email him.
You know, we cited your friend's study because I think

(50:28):
it's a.

Speaker 2 (50:29):
Great thing to know that.

Speaker 1 (50:30):
So when people it's okay, they said here in your
twenties you got a hustle and work hard. In your
thirties you're going to find where you're passionate at and
a forty you're almost like starting to think about semi retirement.
And you're fifty your semi retired and you're sixty you
should be retired. Yeah, not retired from life nor serving,

(50:52):
but from hustling. Yes, twenties is for hustling.

Speaker 2 (50:55):
You're just figuring it out.

Speaker 1 (50:57):
And your thirties is when, oh, this is who I am.
Forty you should like, I know what I want.

Speaker 4 (51:02):
Isn't it funny that transition from each of those phases
that you just said. It's it's even hard to move
through those phases, right, those are like scary parts.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
And this is the thing.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
What if you're still struggling at forty, yeah, or at fifty?

Speaker 2 (51:15):
How dare say that? You know?

Speaker 1 (51:18):
But the thing is that's why we have community. And
I think that us, like we women or all of
us in the community, we should help each other.

Speaker 3 (51:26):
I think.

Speaker 2 (51:26):
So, you know, I believe in collaboration not competition.

Speaker 1 (51:29):
Me too, you know in my business, I have partnerships
we're in they're exactly the same business, but we collaborate
with them because we win together. I think we need
to stop we need to stop that crab mentality that
somebody's better than me.

Speaker 2 (51:44):
Oh, I'm gonna be jealous.

Speaker 4 (51:45):
Room for everybody, you know, because we're all different people,
and so like it works better this way.

Speaker 3 (51:51):
We can all be part of the wheel.

Speaker 4 (51:53):
We don't have to push each other out and say
like I want everything, Like being greedy is just it's
an it for me.

Speaker 1 (52:01):
And then you know, just so you know, when you're greedy,
you lose connections, and when you lose connections, you lose fulfillment.
And you can have a million dollars in the bank,
but if you have only your friend is yourself and
that's it.

Speaker 3 (52:15):
Yeah, you know, even introverts like feel empty.

Speaker 1 (52:18):
I know a lot of introverts. My husband's introvert. Yeah,
but he still wants that connection. Doesn't mean that he
wants to hang out all the time. I bring him
to Filipino parties and yeah, it drains him. He needs
to charge his battery. Yeah, but he's still creates for
that connection, of course, and I think that it's a
special thing.

Speaker 2 (52:36):
And so this is the last part okay.

Speaker 1 (52:39):
So I always like to leave our listeners with a
challenge to help them build their own courage. So what's
this one bold step you'd encourage someone to take this week?

Speaker 3 (52:49):
Oh okay, So.

Speaker 4 (52:52):
I guess something I would assign someone to be courageous
with is.

Speaker 2 (52:57):
Listen, people.

Speaker 4 (53:00):
I actually am practicing this for myself this week, so
I'm just gonna pass it on for you guys.

Speaker 3 (53:06):
To be courageous is pause.

Speaker 4 (53:09):
Take a breath and listen to what's in front of you,
whether it's work related or it's relationship related. Pause, take
a breath, listen, and then respond.

Speaker 1 (53:24):
And I think that when you do that, that pause
is very important to transition to the next step in
your life. It's very hard to be courageous when you're tired,
when you're weak, when you don't have that energy your motivation.
So in order for you to have that, you got

(53:44):
to reflect and pause. And a lot of people don't
like thinking because they think that thinking is weak. And
just say, you know, before I have, I had my business,
like I was like nowhere to be found, Like people
are texting, are you okay? Somebody messaging in Facebook?

Speaker 3 (54:00):
You're good?

Speaker 2 (54:00):
Yeah, I'm gone. Hi cha you know that's my nickname.

Speaker 1 (54:05):
I'm going to call a welfare check on you because
you are not in social media?

Speaker 3 (54:11):
Yeah, where are they?

Speaker 1 (54:12):
But I was thinking, yeah, I was discerning, and I
think a lot of people look down on being quiet
at times, like I'm your reliquacious just like you. However,
when I need to make a very important decision, I
have to stop.

Speaker 2 (54:27):
I have to think and reflect.

Speaker 1 (54:28):
I have to sometimes ask people, but I pray and
I think of the past, the present, in the future,
and also how will my decision affect the people around me?

Speaker 2 (54:39):
Because I am not an island.

Speaker 1 (54:41):
Yes, and if you have to step back, that's okay,
Just don't step back forever.

Speaker 4 (54:47):
Yeah, I think just you know that pause for me
because I have I'm so emotional and you probably understand
this too because you shared. You are that like immediate
reaction that wants to come out of your body because
somebody may have said something to you that you didn't like,
or you want to respond first, so you get super
reactive and try to be as fast as you can.

(55:07):
It just puts you in a position where you're not
in control. You're right, you know of your own emotions
and not control of the situation, because that's a whole
different topic.

Speaker 3 (55:16):
But just in control of.

Speaker 4 (55:16):
Your emotions and being able to like, truly authentically answer
and respond to people that you love and that you're
working with thoughtfully is super important. Yeah, and I will
take that challenge because I need that.

Speaker 2 (55:29):
I really need to pause.

Speaker 1 (55:30):
But thank you so much for joining us today. So
fun another episode of Courageously Speaking podcast hosted by yours
truly Maria Soriano, and a huge thank you to our beautiful,
inspiring and kind guest, Miss Maria Cabande, our Filipino American,
for sharing her incredible journey of reinvention and invaluable courage.

(55:53):
Her story actually reminds us all that's staying true to
ourselves while embracing growth is one of the greatest acts
of courage.

Speaker 2 (56:01):
And to our.

Speaker 1 (56:01):
Listeners, if this episode resonated with you, don't forget to subscribe,
share it with someone who could use a doseph inspiration,
and visit www dot courage Creatives dot com for more
resources to help you leap with courage and purpose.

Speaker 2 (56:15):
And remember, courage.

Speaker 1 (56:17):
Is actually isn't about the absence of fear. It's about
taking action.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
This is quite so.

Speaker 1 (56:23):
Until next time, stay courageous Bye,