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Tara (00:01):
This is the EWN Podcast
Network.
Hi. I'm Tara from Plus
Fitness with Tara.
I'm a
curvy, fun, body positive
coach and personal trainer. I
love business and fitness. Doyou have the tools you need to
be a rock star in fitness? Ahealthy love of yourself and
help from me in sifting throughhealth news will do that. I've
got fitness topics and guests.
(00:21):
Rock stars aren't born. They'rebred in experience and fire.
Let's do this together.
Hi, everyone. Welcome to
Plus Fitness with Tara, the
podcast. Today, I'm talkingabout the topic of failure and
what it means to me and where Ilook to be reminded when, you
(00:43):
know, maybe you get a littlesad, maybe you get a lot tired,
maybe you get frustrated atyourself. So let me just
commiserate with you and tellyou that sometimes these dips
that we go through on this riverof life is a teaching lesson.
(01:04):
And I don't know how to tell youthis, but I have failed more
than once.
And according to my mom, Ifailed when I was born and
wasn't a son. So I think I'mdoing pretty good considering my
choice was to continue on and,keep going despite parental
disapproval. But that's amongother things she said to me over
(01:24):
my lifetime. And now as she'sfacing the end of hers with
untreated mental health issuesand dementia about her cancer,
her cardiac condition, and renalfailure, I honestly just look at
her and think she's got allkinds of biological things
failing, and she still gets upevery day, faces the day, and
(01:45):
takes it as it comes. That isstrength.
But, anyway, back to the topic Ibrought up. What is failure?
What does it look like? Is itthe same for everyone? I doubt
it.
But I can tell you, silverneedle with a thread in this
tapestry of life, that we canlearn from failure more than
from assumptions andnonscientific confidence.
(02:08):
Assumptions. Right? Let's getrid of those. Fact versus
reality.
Of course, while I talk aboutthis, I often think of it
because it's amazing to me thatI even have to mention that
science is evidence based peerreviewed studies and not
conspiracy theories or bigpharma beliefs and lies and
other blown out of proportionbeliefs about science. It's
(02:30):
real. It happens. And despitewhat's currently going on in our
Western culture, it hasevidence. We get results.
Peers review it, and we judge itbased on its validity. But,
again, when I think of failure,I think of my failure as always
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being to assume the good inpeople, not just in their
behavior, but in their businessand personal actions first, in
their life, even in their hiddenprivate life. Innocent until
proven guilty has been somethingI have lived by with since I was
a teenager. But now, as theworld has turned several times
since then, it's guilty byaccusation and cancel culture in
(03:11):
our western culture withoutlistening to reason or logic or
any explanations or any validvalidity of proof. No wonder the
Real Housewives of Salt LakeCity declare receipts, proof,
timeline as a motto becausewe're so quick to judge and to
assume without actuallylistening with our entire being
to what the other person istrying to communicate to us.
(03:33):
Communicate by conversation,dialogue, communicate by in
person, body actions, nonverbalcues. Communicate by phone,
listening to the voice, hearingit fluctuate, communication by
text. We have emojis that we alluse as a way to soften or
(03:55):
strengthen our text messages.But I think we're in
communication failure. We seeit, we try it, and we still
gaslight each other every day.
Here's one person I look at alot. List to his podcast. Jay
Shetty. What does Jay Shettyhave to say about failure?
(04:16):
Failure as a learningopportunity.
Shetty views failure not as anend, but as an opportunity to
learn, grow, and refine one'sapproach. Failure reflects
passion. He believes that ourreaction to failure reveals the
depth of our passion andcommitment to our endeavors.
Failure is a mirror. Shettysuggests that failure can act as
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a mirror, reflecting ourcommitment and care towards our
goals.
Overcoming fear of judgment.Shetty encourages people to
overcome the fear of judgmentand focus on personal growth and
learning from setbacks. Failureas a doorkeeper to success. He
uses the metaphor of failure asa doorkeeper to success,
suggesting that overcomingchallenges can lead to greater
(05:00):
opportunities. Failure is notthe end.
Shetty emphasizes that failureis not the end of the story, but
rather part of the journeytowards success. Learning from
mistakes. Shetty encouragespeople to analyze their
failures, identify lessonslearned, and use that knowledge
to improve their future actions.Embrace the uncomfortable. He
(05:21):
suggested getting comfortablewith the uncomfortable,
including failure, can lead topersonal growth and a more
fulfilling life.
Focus on self care. Shettyemphasized the importance of
taking care of oneself afterexperiencing failure or
rejection, allowing oneself toheal and learn from the
experience. And finally, don'tlet fear of failure hold you
back. Jay Shetty encouragespeople to not let the fear of
(05:44):
failure prevent them frompursuing their passions and
goals. How about Oprah?
What does Oprah Winfrey believeabout failure? In a review of
her published ideas andcommentary online. Failure is a
stepping stone. Oprah viewsfailure not as an end, but as a
catalyst for growth and change,pointing out that setbacks can
lead to new paths andopportunities. Learning from
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mistakes.
She emphasizes the importance oflearning from every mistake and
experience as they are valuabletools for personal development
and self discovery. MayaAngelou's influence. Oprah
credits Maya Angelou forteaching her to say thank you in
the midst of failure,recognizing that there is a
clearing and a path that we madeon the other side. Knowing what
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you don't want. Oprah also hasthe importance of understanding
what you don't want as thisknowledge can be just as
valuable as knowing what you dowant.
Oprah has shared personalexperiences of facing adversity
and being demoted, which sheviews as crucial lessons that
shaped her path. She says thereis no such thing as failure. It
is a core belief of hers. And onOprah.com, this article has some
(06:51):
insight into failure by AnnWilson Shafe, PhD. She says a
setback can lead us to a betterplace if we just let it.
Lately, I've been pondering theidea of failure and considering
that maybe there really is nosuch thing. What we perceive as
a failure simply may be ourinner being's way of telling us
that we are ready to move to anew level of growth. No matter
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how well we think we knowourselves, we all have blind
spots, and we all have an innerbeing that connects with
something much wiser thanourselves that sees the larger
picture of our journey towardswisdom and wholeness. All too
often, when we rely on ourconscious mind, we resist or
overlook opportunities to grow,So our spirit has to get our
attention. Failures are a veryefficient way of doing that.
(07:36):
Getting fired was a gift. Shestates, when my friend Andy
landed a startup positionhandling phone orders for a
cosmetics firm, she was sure shewould create wise quickly
through the ranks. But Andycouldn't seem to work as fast as
the others. She hated thepressure and dreaded going to
work, but she resolved that shecould succeed if she kept at it.
Before long, her boss called herinto his office and fired her.
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He said she was just too slow.Andy was devastated. In tears,
she asked me why her colleaguescould do the job so well while
she couldn't. But after a fewdays of rage and shame, Andy
took another look at thesituation. She'd hated the job
and felt terrible doing it.
She remembered that her boss hassaid that although she was slow,
she was very accurate on thecomputer. So she decided to take
an intense computer trainingcourse and now has a job that
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she truly enjoys where accuracy,not speed, is valued. Her
failure provided a life changingopportunity. She learned not to
beat herself up. Another friend,Margo, had to get back from a
business trip in time for anextremely important meeting at
work.
But somehow, she didn't allowenough time to get to the
airport, and she missed herplane. Margo began rebuking
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herself. I should have left lastnight. I should have taken an
earlier plane. Then a funnything happened.
As Margot thought about thethings she could have done
differently, she realized thatshe always had choices. In fact,
she chose her reaction to thesituation. She decided not to
obsess about it, and aftercalling her boss to apologize,
used her newfound free time totake a walk. As Marco relaxed,
(09:03):
her creativity flowed and sharedto feel positive about the
future whatever the outcome. Thenext morning when she arrived at
work, she learned that severalpeople had been similarly
delayed, and the meeting hadbeen postponed until that day.
Margaret was a smash. Having letgo of her fear and self
recrimination, she had had a lotmore time to offer. Missing her
flight would have been a failureonly if she'd refused to learn.
(09:23):
Ann Wilson states that spirituallessons are everywhere. When we
see our work as part of theplaying field for personal
growth, we become less enmeshedin it and less frantic about the
outcome.
Then we can enjoy it more, andwe can make a greater
contribution. Ann Wilson Schaff,PSG, is the author of
Meditations for Women Who Do TooMuch and Meditations for Living
in Balance. And I just wanna addsomething. So I have been
(09:47):
following as a retirementfailure, I've been following a
sports figure Alona Mayer sinceDancing of the Stars and her
career in rugby after theOlympics. And here's a
professional LinkedIn calledStephanie Corrugula pointing at
Alona Mayer's response to nothaving a posture system that so
many women claim they have.
She says in her message, AlonaMarriage is single handedly
(10:10):
cured my impostor syndrome. Ifyou haven't seen her recent
interview where she flat outsays, I don't have that. When
asked about she handles impostorsyndrome, go watch it. But she
answered comment with this.Quoting Eleanor, she says, it's
okay to be proud of what you'vedone.
It's okay to believe you deservesomething because you've put in
the work for it. And she'sright, says Stephanie Crongela.
I worked so hard for many yearsbuilding niche skills, learning
(10:33):
and growing. So why do I feellike I don't belong in
marketing? That mindset is sotwenty twenty four.
20 20 five, says Stephanie, isfor celebrating with wins and
being proud of what we've workedfor. Well, my thought on that
with this topic of failure isjust around the constant
challenge I have to feed myself.I go on sprints where I prepare
overnight oats, use the proteinshakes, have lunch and greens
(10:55):
ready, and have supper ready.But now with all the stress
waiting for my surgery, I findit hard to get motivated. So I
was so pleased at what happenedlast week.
What is it? Well, I'm looking atthis new cookbook that came to
my door this week. Author is KaiSakita, master of science,
registered dietitian, thecreator of Nutrition by Kylie in
social media, and her book iscalled so easy, so good and
(11:16):
available now. This book hassome great fantastic recipes
that are easy to do and ready togo. You're not gonna find a
complicated day of soakingthings like beans happening, you
know, overnight.
You're gonna you're gonna findrecipes that fit your way of
living that you can do in thirtyminutes and, you know, enjoy. So
(11:38):
I'm celebrating this cookbook asI review some recipes today, and
they're easy to make plus lookdelish. Congrats on the book,
Kylie, and I look forward totrying these out. I hope you've
enjoyed this little podcastabout failure coming through it
and what some people have to saylike Jay Shetty, Oprah, and
others. And I just wanna let youknow that no matter what you're
going through as you encounter apersonal or professional
(12:01):
failure, understand that thereis a saying that I always hang
on to as I go through theprocess of deep diving into
motion called this shoe thisthis too shall pass.
And that's what I've hung on towith waiting on the surgery and
being delayed as I found outover a week ago by another
couple months is that this tooshall pass. I have to trust that
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what I am doing, the path, andthe journey will lead me to the
goal of getting this benigntumor out of my ear. Alright.
Thanks for listening, everyone.Yours in health, and, catch me
on social, Tara c McDonald Inc.
Bye for now.