In this episode, Paul and Stacey will talk about a topic that is literally fundamental to what we think of when we think of relationship struggles. And that is the tendency of taking sides when we re-tell stories or people re-tell stories to us, mostly about terrible situations, either with their partners, or their parents, or somebody at their workplace. And when they tell us, we immediately go right into it with them either to console them or to hopefully give them some advice.
In the process, we end up taking sides because we have the best of intentions with that person. Even in life in general, when we're looking for advice, or we're giving advice, we always get into that pattern of taking sides. That whole pattern is fundamental to relationship situations, and we can literally hear it everywhere we go. You could just be walking through the grocery store, and you will hear people telling stories about how horrible somebody else was to them, or whatever the situation was.
That tendency has insidious and destructive effects, and if we don't awaken to it, it's can destroy things for us as we know them. Paul and Stacey will turn that pattern on its head, show us how destructive it is, and what we can do instead to not only learn to take personal responsibility in all our relationship situations but also strengthen those relationships for the long haul. Take out your pen and paper because you won’t wanna miss the lessons from this. Enjoy!
Key Points Discussed:
- The only answer we should give when we’re asked if we have a question (02:02)
- Learning to ask questions in the form of personal responsibility (03:05)
- How blaming or bad-mouthing others triggers other people to take sides (05:57)
- Building up our relationships rather than protecting our triggers for a lifetime (07:02)
- Navigating situations from relationship development and not demand relationship (08:52)
- Putting on our relationship transformer goggles, being compassionate, kind, and awake (10:48)
Additional Resources:
- The 14-Day Boost Program
- www.MyRelationshipDevelopmentCommunity.com
- www.RelationshipBreakthroughRetreat.com
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