December 28, 2021 • 10 mins
Santa Claus is not exactly a saint. This is the true story of Nicholas and Krampus, twins born long ago. One pure and the other deformed. A monster. His parents wanted him dead, but Nicholas has other plans in mind!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:03):
Hey, Mom, did you hearthat? Hear what? Bit? It
sounds like something magical is happening outside, But the winter winds whooping at the
trees and the fire crackling, itwas very hard to hear. And why
is that so magical? Lisa?Did you hear it that time? I
did? But what exactly do youthink is rap tap tapping on our podcast
(00:24):
door? I don't know, Mom. Why don't you just see if you
insist? Oops? Did I saymagical? I meant monstrous? Mary Twelve
Days of Christmas? Are you readyfor a story? Mary? Chris Minnisode
(00:56):
number three. I thought the lastone was number three, but it was
number two. I think I'm crazy. Yeah. Anyways, Hi, La,
Si, Hi Mommy, and hito everyone else. Hello, Hello,
Zie's you said that on one likea couple episodes. I thought it
was like the cutest thing ever.Thank you everyone for listening. We're so
(01:19):
glad. Yeah that you're joining usfor another one. Or if this is
your first time, I mean youcould go back into the first episode.
Yeah, go back and listen tohim. Yeah, thank you for joining
us. If it is your firstepisode, so you know, Santa has
(01:40):
been around for years. Yeah,of course everyone knows the same holiday story.
What's Santa's story? The sono Clausis a guy who who brings toys
kids all around the world. He'sfrom the North Pool. And how does
(02:00):
this nice, nice list and naughtylist? Because the kids that aren't good
don't get to be the nicest andthey get cold. There was a boy
born so pure of heart and kindthat eventually he became a saint. He
couldn't keep any gifts. Then heand his family stopped aging. They became
(02:20):
timeless, and to carry on thetradition of love and the spirit of giving,
they don't age, and they justkeep on going and filling the world
with gifts and love and presence andonly to those that are good. Right,
that's the normal story of Saint Nicholas. Did you know that? Yeah,
here's the crazy part. Good oldSaint Nick wasn't born alone. He
(02:43):
was a twin, but like thereal one. He was a twin really
not how you think, though hewas born different. The twin was dark
in complexion, His back was longand twisted. The doctor's reports say that
his shoulders were hunched. He hadsharp claws for hands. His skull was
so deformed that right above his eyes. He had large calcified bone fragments that
(03:09):
protruded like demon horns. You thefirst boy that was one of the twins.
He grew up and he became whatthey eventually called a saint. He
was just a nice guy. Itstarted out a nice guy in a town.
He couldn't keep any gifts. Hewould re gift. He wanted to
make sure that everyone had everything theyneeded all of the time. Right the
(03:30):
other one. His parents didn't nourishhim, they didn't love him. He
deteriorated. They kept him in thebasement in darkness, and one day the
parents died while Nicholas decided to goahead and let him out. What he
did was since he had already becomesomewhat of a gift giver in the town,
(03:52):
he decided that his brother was goingto decide who was bad, so
that was his job. He justcouldn't do what he was asked. He
grew angry, and he loved hisbrother, but he grew angry, and
not with his brother, but withthe children for never being good on their
behavior, and then for the olderadults that did bad things. And he
(04:14):
didn't understand why when there was peoplelike his brother. That was so kind,
because his brother's the one that ledhim out right. So one night
in early December in the nineteen thirties, you know, a good enough amount
of time before Christmas, okay,he decides to go out on his own
journey. He took an uber no. I'm just kidding, he should it.
(04:36):
No, yeah, Crampas took anuber no. So early in December,
he decided to go out before Christmas, before his brother came to visit.
But what he did was so messedup. He spent the entire night
hunting down naughty children. It allstarted with children. He would knock on
(04:57):
the doors of the houses and thenwould rush and grabbed the child by the
neck and throw them out the frontdoor into the cold night in the pajamas.
And if they stayed still, Crampuswould slowly circle them, asking why
they had been so bad. Andhe had this brown burlap sack. He
(05:19):
would ask the children if they wantedto end up in the bag, and
they would cry and they would saythey were sorry. They would beg telling
him no and that they would begood. They would be good, and
he would whip them with a hugeswitch and send them to bed. But
only if they begged. If theyran, he would chase them down through
(05:41):
the streets, waiting around corners,whisper taunting, shifting from shadow to shadow
around corners, just enough so thathe couldn't be seen. And then all
of the sudden they'd get struck andwhipped and slapped, and you would hear
the crack, and the switch wouldbe descending down on the bad child,
(06:04):
beating them over and over until theyhad no more energy, and they couldn't
run, they couldn't barely breathe,they couldn't bite, And only then Crampus
would scoop him up and stuff themin his burlap sack. Doesn't matter what
(06:24):
he heard, how they cried,what he heard crack, if he heard
him beg, he would stuff himin the sack, and he would drag
him around all night long. Andthen he would drag him through the streets,
and you would see their arms andthe legs coming out of the holes
in the sack. As the sunwas about to rise that morning, Crampus
(06:47):
bellowed, and then he called forthe attention of his brother, Saint Nicholas
and all of the townspeople. Thestreets filled with terrified residence, stammering out
of their houses. Crampus moved slowlytoward Nicholas, and as he did,
the burlap sack drugged down the street. It twisted in his hand and shifted,
(07:11):
and an arm and a leg wouldkeep slipping out. He would quickly
whip the arms and the legs thehouse that he had taken the child from
on the way down the street inthe first place. Well, he reached
into the bag and he pulled thatchild out. He threw them on to
the stoops at the feet of theirown families. Some were only half alive,
(07:33):
and some weren't. They weren't aliveat all. And when he approached
his brother, finally, Saint Nicholasat the end of the road. He
was breathing hard and his eyes weresolid stone. Staring into Nicholas's eyes,
Nicholas reached out and he grabbed Crampus. He turned him around to face the
(07:56):
townspeople. He took a deep breath, and he sat. He stood silent
for a long time. Crampus hadhis head down. Nicholas patted Crampus on
the back, and then he lookedup a warning on this cold, dark
knight. Brother Crampus will come topunish sinful souls. Mind your manners.
(08:18):
There's no need to fright, butdisobey. Crampus will be unleashed in a
place where there is a special needfor behavior correction. He will gather the
rock, the naughty, wicked,and the villainous. He'll beat them to
a bloody pulp before stuffing them inhis sack. And that is the old
(08:41):
story. He didn't care what hisbrother did. He left him so much
that he used his brother to warneverybody, and then he put him to
sleep for years. Honestly, Ifeel scared, and I didn't like that,
(09:03):
and I don't. I feel weird. It scares me and I don't.
I didn't like that. I understand, and it's it's scary, and
I don't want to, like Iever do anything anything that will like disobey
to him or something. I don'tknow. Do you have any advice for
(09:26):
them? Just be good and don'treally do anything back. Okay, as
I ask you this question, I'mreally not sure how you're going to answer.
Do you want to do it again? Yeah? Not right now?
Are you ready for another scary storynext time? Though? Right? Yeah?
(09:46):
All right, thank you? Forlistening. I hope you enjoyed it.
We'll see you for the next ChrisMinnesote tomorrow. We love you.
Bye, m hm jingle bells,some go smell. Beware of mister Gray
(10:13):
CRAMPI steels children's heads and escapes unsantuslike hey, merry Chris Minicode
Hey, Mom, did you hearthat? Hear what? Bit? It
sounds like something magical is happening outside, But the winter winds whooping at the
trees and the fire crackling, itwas very hard to hear. And why
is that so magical? Lisa?Did you hear it that time? I
did? But what exactly do youthink is rap tap tapping on our podcast
(00:24):
door? I don't know, Mom. Why don't you just see if you
insist? Oops? Did I saymagical? I meant monstrous? Mary Twelve
Days of Christmas? Are you readyfor a story? Mary? Chris Minnisode
(00:56):
number three. I thought the lastone was number three, but it was
number two. I think I'm crazy. Yeah. Anyways, Hi, La,
Si, Hi Mommy, and hito everyone else. Hello, Hello,
Zie's you said that on one likea couple episodes. I thought it
was like the cutest thing ever.Thank you everyone for listening. We're so
(01:19):
glad. Yeah that you're joining usfor another one. Or if this is
your first time, I mean youcould go back into the first episode.
Yeah, go back and listen tohim. Yeah, thank you for joining
us. If it is your firstepisode, so you know, Santa has
(01:40):
been around for years. Yeah,of course everyone knows the same holiday story.
What's Santa's story? The sono Clausis a guy who who brings toys
kids all around the world. He'sfrom the North Pool. And how does
(02:00):
this nice, nice list and naughtylist? Because the kids that aren't good
don't get to be the nicest andthey get cold. There was a boy
born so pure of heart and kindthat eventually he became a saint. He
couldn't keep any gifts. Then heand his family stopped aging. They became
(02:20):
timeless, and to carry on thetradition of love and the spirit of giving,
they don't age, and they justkeep on going and filling the world
with gifts and love and presence andonly to those that are good. Right,
that's the normal story of Saint Nicholas. Did you know that? Yeah,
here's the crazy part. Good oldSaint Nick wasn't born alone. He
(02:43):
was a twin, but like thereal one. He was a twin really
not how you think, though hewas born different. The twin was dark
in complexion, His back was longand twisted. The doctor's reports say that
his shoulders were hunched. He hadsharp claws for hands. His skull was
so deformed that right above his eyes. He had large calcified bone fragments that
(03:09):
protruded like demon horns. You thefirst boy that was one of the twins.
He grew up and he became whatthey eventually called a saint. He
was just a nice guy. Itstarted out a nice guy in a town.
He couldn't keep any gifts. Hewould re gift. He wanted to
make sure that everyone had everything theyneeded all of the time. Right the
(03:30):
other one. His parents didn't nourishhim, they didn't love him. He
deteriorated. They kept him in thebasement in darkness, and one day the
parents died while Nicholas decided to goahead and let him out. What he
did was since he had already becomesomewhat of a gift giver in the town,
(03:52):
he decided that his brother was goingto decide who was bad, so
that was his job. He justcouldn't do what he was asked. He
grew angry, and he loved hisbrother, but he grew angry, and
not with his brother, but withthe children for never being good on their
behavior, and then for the olderadults that did bad things. And he
(04:14):
didn't understand why when there was peoplelike his brother. That was so kind,
because his brother's the one that ledhim out right. So one night
in early December in the nineteen thirties, you know, a good enough amount
of time before Christmas, okay,he decides to go out on his own
journey. He took an uber no. I'm just kidding, he should it.
(04:36):
No, yeah, Crampas took anuber no. So early in December,
he decided to go out before Christmas, before his brother came to visit.
But what he did was so messedup. He spent the entire night
hunting down naughty children. It allstarted with children. He would knock on
(04:57):
the doors of the houses and thenwould rush and grabbed the child by the
neck and throw them out the frontdoor into the cold night in the pajamas.
And if they stayed still, Crampuswould slowly circle them, asking why
they had been so bad. Andhe had this brown burlap sack. He
(05:19):
would ask the children if they wantedto end up in the bag, and
they would cry and they would saythey were sorry. They would beg telling
him no and that they would begood. They would be good, and
he would whip them with a hugeswitch and send them to bed. But
only if they begged. If theyran, he would chase them down through
(05:41):
the streets, waiting around corners,whisper taunting, shifting from shadow to shadow
around corners, just enough so thathe couldn't be seen. And then all
of the sudden they'd get struck andwhipped and slapped, and you would hear
the crack, and the switch wouldbe descending down on the bad child,
(06:04):
beating them over and over until theyhad no more energy, and they couldn't
run, they couldn't barely breathe,they couldn't bite, And only then Crampus
would scoop him up and stuff themin his burlap sack. Doesn't matter what
(06:24):
he heard, how they cried,what he heard crack, if he heard
him beg, he would stuff himin the sack, and he would drag
him around all night long. Andthen he would drag him through the streets,
and you would see their arms andthe legs coming out of the holes
in the sack. As the sunwas about to rise that morning, Crampus
(06:47):
bellowed, and then he called forthe attention of his brother, Saint Nicholas
and all of the townspeople. Thestreets filled with terrified residence, stammering out
of their houses. Crampus moved slowlytoward Nicholas, and as he did,
the burlap sack drugged down the street. It twisted in his hand and shifted,
(07:11):
and an arm and a leg wouldkeep slipping out. He would quickly
whip the arms and the legs thehouse that he had taken the child from
on the way down the street inthe first place. Well, he reached
into the bag and he pulled thatchild out. He threw them on to
the stoops at the feet of theirown families. Some were only half alive,
(07:33):
and some weren't. They weren't aliveat all. And when he approached
his brother, finally, Saint Nicholasat the end of the road. He
was breathing hard and his eyes weresolid stone. Staring into Nicholas's eyes,
Nicholas reached out and he grabbed Crampus. He turned him around to face the
(07:56):
townspeople. He took a deep breath, and he sat. He stood silent
for a long time. Crampus hadhis head down. Nicholas patted Crampus on
the back, and then he lookedup a warning on this cold, dark
knight. Brother Crampus will come topunish sinful souls. Mind your manners.
(08:18):
There's no need to fright, butdisobey. Crampus will be unleashed in a
place where there is a special needfor behavior correction. He will gather the
rock, the naughty, wicked,and the villainous. He'll beat them to
a bloody pulp before stuffing them inhis sack. And that is the old
(08:41):
story. He didn't care what hisbrother did. He left him so much
that he used his brother to warneverybody, and then he put him to
sleep for years. Honestly, Ifeel scared, and I didn't like that,
(09:03):
and I don't. I feel weird. It scares me and I don't.
I didn't like that. I understand, and it's it's scary, and
I don't want to, like Iever do anything anything that will like disobey
to him or something. I don'tknow. Do you have any advice for
(09:26):
them? Just be good and don'treally do anything back. Okay, as
I ask you this question, I'mreally not sure how you're going to answer.
Do you want to do it again? Yeah? Not right now?
Are you ready for another scary storynext time? Though? Right? Yeah?
(09:46):
All right, thank you? Forlistening. I hope you enjoyed it.
We'll see you for the next ChrisMinnesote tomorrow. We love you.
Bye, m hm jingle bells,some go smell. Beware of mister Gray
(10:13):
CRAMPI steels children's heads and escapes unsantuslike hey, merry Chris Minicode
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