Breaking Free: How to Take Control of Your Path and Build a Future on Your Terms.

By the end of this segment, you will have some things to think about to start building a future that YOU control—whether you’re an employee, athlete, business owner, or creative. Seek ELLAvation is a space for growth and transformation, where seekers are empowered to break strongholds and elevate themselves in all aspects of life.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
There was a time people counting me out, but there
mocking me.

Speaker 2 (00:09):
I'm looking sun that.

Speaker 3 (00:12):
I got to know to know what I.

Speaker 1 (00:16):
Said, but what I believe that God's not bad. I
don't be to bother me. I know who I well.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
I'm created.

Speaker 4 (00:33):
On my third reflect what my eyes did to see
all the baitnesssyphosis and less subility.

Speaker 3 (00:51):
What a sad a gallery.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
There is no time really.

Speaker 1 (01:09):
Space for the outside door and better one of that
boy is the intent still itself, pay delisions and.

Speaker 3 (01:22):
Can say all the simple Monday bye something, thank your
mind for pay you by plesa your one boy, this
play head leave off time all with the longest nine.

Speaker 5 (01:43):
Ninety Welcome, Welcome, Welcome to another segment of Seek Elevation.
This is the Seek Elevation experience with yours truly, Attorney Alakeisha. Yes,

(02:07):
I am an attorney, but I may not be yours.
I know I have clients listening, but I have a
lot of clients not clients listening. This is my platform
to speak and to use that knowledge and couple it
with all the information and gems that I share, but
more importantly that I bring amazing geniuses on this platform.

Speaker 2 (02:28):
To share as well.

Speaker 5 (02:31):
This right here is where real issues, real people, and
real conversations takes center stage because change does not happen
in silence. And I'm talking about from sports and entertainment
to business community right here on seek elevation. This is
where we break down the truth and spark meaningful change

(02:54):
and elevate voices that need to be heard. And sometimes
that's your voice as well as a listener.

Speaker 2 (03:04):
For the lives.

Speaker 5 (03:05):
You can comment, you can ask questions, you can share
your opinions. We have to get out what's in us.
We have to get it out, and we have to
respect what everyone is sharing and saying and all of
us learn and grow from it because in this space,
we don't just talk, We empower, inspire, and we definitely

(03:29):
challenge the status quo. So as a listener, as a viewer,
whether it's live or replay, it doesn't matter if you're
an athlete, an entertainer, a business leader, or someone striving
for a better life. These conversations I definitely will make
sure they're for all of you. I want you to

(03:51):
tap in, drop comments. Again, Like I said, share and
let's make impact together, especially in these times, in this climate,
it's time for us to elevate in it, not to shrink,
not to walk in fear, but to use it to
dig deeper, to see what we're made of. And that's

(04:15):
one of the reasons why I did Lives this season
three for Seek Elevation. This season three, I started out
where I was just sharing short, fifteen minute segments and
then I went on to do pre recorded interviews, amazing interviews.

(04:35):
I'm gonna repurpose and play some of those as well.
But when I seen what we kind of shifted at
here and these times, I decided, Hmm, I want to
go live every Tuesday at seven pm. I want to
go live because I want to give the viewers, the

(04:56):
listeners an opportunity to chime in, and I want you
to see that it's real time. It's not rehearsed in
pre record. We're gonna talk real time, and we don't
know where a flow can go. I just trust in
the flow to use my voice and prayerfully bring individuals
on that just allows their voice to be used, because

(05:17):
if I have anything to do with it, I'm gonna
make sure that we are we're elevating, we're not being
stuck at all. So today's topic is breaking free how
to control, take control of your path and build a
future on your terms. My objective is by the end

(05:39):
of this live stream, you'll have some things to just
think about to start building a future that you control.

Speaker 2 (05:47):
Whatever that may look like.

Speaker 5 (05:50):
We don't know what may be depositive, we don't know
what may be aha, we don't know what may be
a confirmation.

Speaker 2 (05:57):
So again, chime in.

Speaker 5 (05:59):
It does not matter if you are an employee, an athlete,
a business owner, creative. I identify individuals actually that touches
either one or all of those areas. All of it
bill who we are. Before I bring my guests on,
I always do a little bitter research to kind of

(06:23):
insert it into our topic. I want to be very
short on it today because I want to use most
of the time for the guests that are going to
come in and you know, to share their knowledge and
their experiences with us. What I decided to do for
this topic of breaking free is to look at individuals.

(06:46):
I hear this all the time, especially now those who
from those who are entrepreneurs, but a lot of those
who are employees. They a lot of people just feel like,
you know, I'm stuck. There's a lot of people losing jobs,
fearing to lose jobs. They just don't feel like there
is any control at all in their space. And I

(07:10):
just want us to just take a deep breath and
look at whatever we do have in our space. Whatever
we do have, whatever is put in our reach, is
there for us to use it to bring us to
that next level in some way.

Speaker 2 (07:26):
But if we operate in fair.

Speaker 5 (07:30):
Analysis of paralysis, we will not be able to see
the things that we have in front of us, especially
as employees. I was when I did my case study.
I looked at a lot of individuals, but three of
them that really stood out to me because these are
three well known names, respectfully and inarguably, I would say

(07:54):
that use things that was in front of them to
take them to where they are right now.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
Looked at Vera Wang. We know Vera Wayne. She makes
all the.

Speaker 5 (08:04):
Bridal dresses, all beyond bridle dresses, just fashion. She started
with that right She started as an employee. She started
as someone who was a senior fashion.

Speaker 2 (08:19):
Editor for Vogue.

Speaker 5 (08:23):
She used that platform to learn more. She wasn't there
just working. She was using what was in her reach
to build more of who she was supposed to be.
And she moved quickly up those ranks with Vogue, and
then she moved on to Ralph. Lauren learned all the
things she needed to learn there. She operated control within

(08:44):
her space and she used all that she learned from
those two platforms to later launching her own brand, which
we know as the Vera Wang Bridalhouse in New York City.
So she used things that was around her to elevate
what was in her and for her. Damon John we

(09:04):
know him as someone who found it Fuble, and that
means for us, by us, very creative on how he
elevated that brand. He was someone who was still living
with his mother when he launched that brand. He had
some assistance from his mother, but you know what he
was doing as well. He was working at Red Lobster

(09:25):
as a waiter, and he was using all of his
wages from waiting tables to help fund this production of Fuble,
simultaneously doing two things, using what he had in front
of him to elevate where he know where he.

Speaker 2 (09:46):
Was destined to go.

Speaker 5 (09:47):
He continued working, He balanced his day job as a
waiter while he had a startup, and he obviously grew
that to a sustainable, profitable business and so many other
things that we see Damon John doing right now. And
then the last one I have wanted to bring up
because I think if even someone said, well I don't
who is Vera Wing? Who is Damon John? Well this one,

(10:11):
for sure, we all have to know Sam Walton. You
know Walmart, You know Sam Walton and what I liked
about you know his story that kind of reflect the.

Speaker 2 (10:25):
Same thing with Vera Wang and Damon John.

Speaker 5 (10:27):
Was he with someone again, used everything that was around
him to not just elevate himself but obviously impact this world.

Speaker 6 (10:38):
Now.

Speaker 2 (10:38):
He worked as a management trainee.

Speaker 7 (10:42):
At J. C.

Speaker 2 (10:43):
Penny, so he was in retail.

Speaker 5 (10:45):
He did that for a while, disappeared, went into the army,
came back, and got back into retail. He was working
for a franchise, the Ben Franklin Variety Store. Decided to
actually run his own in that franchise, and he had
an AHA moment from things around him. He said, listen,

(11:08):
I want to provide a selection of a wide variety
of goods at the lowest possible prices. Brought it to
the franchisers. There was like, uh, yeah, no, we don't
We're not buying that, right. He didn't lose control. He's
seen what was around him. He's seen that I had
experience in retail. I'm gonna use that. I had experience

(11:29):
with this franchise. I'm gonna use that. Got all of
his money saved up, got a loan from his father
in law, put all that together and said I'm going
to launch my own thing, and he launched a Walmart
discount city store in Arkansas a few years later.

Speaker 2 (11:50):
After getting everything together.

Speaker 5 (11:51):
He used everything around him to launch that and stay
in his control and not pay it.

Speaker 2 (12:01):
These stories that I bring up, I hope.

Speaker 5 (12:05):
For you is encouragement and inspiration to know that whatever
you are part of right now, it is to elevate you,
to connect you to your next You don't get distracted
by everything else that is going on around us. This
is the time for us to tap in any even more.

(12:25):
All right With that said, I'm going to go to it.
I want to bring my guest on.

Speaker 7 (12:32):
I have.

Speaker 5 (12:34):
Two amazing men and for this topic, I'm going to
tell you right now, I chose intentionally chose men to
be the guest to lead on this conversation.

Speaker 2 (12:48):
Yes, my ladies, I know women.

Speaker 5 (12:49):
Are beautiful, we are powerful, we are all the things.
The one thing that Alakisha believes though in our power,
in our beauty and all that, there are certain things
that I believe that I love for men to take
charge in that conversation, to lead in that conversation. And

(13:14):
this is one of the topics I really believe that
was necessary. And I identified to individuals that bring a
combination of experiences that I think will help elevate this conversation.
So the first one I want to introduce is Derek Westbrook.

(13:34):
I'm gonna bring him to the stage.

Speaker 2 (13:35):
In a second.

Speaker 5 (13:36):
He brings over twenty five years of teaching and administrative experience.
He's taught at institutions such as Ohio State University RPI
that's in Renselaer, New York. I'm from Auben, New York
American University in Albany Law School. In twenty twenty three,

(13:58):
he joined Yiolderland Central School District as the director of Diversity,
Equity and Inclusion. We've heard those three words more now
than ever, or paid attention to those more now than ever,
So I'm happy to have him on here for sure.

Speaker 2 (14:18):
But before.

Speaker 5 (14:20):
Joining Guilderling City School District, Central School District, excuse me,
he led KIP Forward in Aubaney, New York. If you
don't know about the KIP schools, look it up doing
great things across the nation, and he directed h EOP

(14:41):
and EOF programs for decades. I got my start, my
second win, my second opportunity on the EOP program at
the University of Albany.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
Doctor Carr.

Speaker 5 (14:55):
Looked at this young lady who was a single mom
and and said, you're doing You did great academically. You
don't have the money, but you have the drive. We're
going to give you the opportunity. So programs like that
so amazing. And this is actually where I met Derek Westbrook.

(15:16):
And they're not just that program, but as my professor
as well there. But he has consulted for k through
twelve systems across multiple states and worked in alternative education settings.
This includes museums, prisons, workforce development, and adult education. And please,

(15:40):
in addition to all this, let's talk about his creative side.
He is a former National Creative Writing Contest winner and
a five time Division III All American and track and field.
You see how sports in life it all goes together.
We are athletes in life. Almost all the genius as

(16:02):
I touched on did sports in some capacity. He remains
passionate about music with martial arts, reading and film. But
while he remains passionate about that, he remains deeply committed
to creating inclusive environments and employing a culturally sustaining, strength

(16:24):
based approach to individual, organizational, and community development. So you
see this is amazing. Utilize the time that you have
with mister Derrick Westbrook. I'm going to bring him to
the stage.

Speaker 8 (16:42):
Now, how are you doing?

Speaker 2 (16:48):
Hello, how are you?

Speaker 8 (16:50):
I'm good, I'm good, I'm right good.

Speaker 2 (16:52):
Same here, all right.

Speaker 5 (16:56):
So now I'm going to introduce our second guest, another amazing,
amazing man. We have doctor Richard A. Cross, who is
an impactor. I am or is two powerful words and
our vocabulary, and I know he can stand in front

(17:19):
of the mirror and say I am an impactor. He
is the founder and president of the black Mail Impact
As an author, an expert in mentorship development, an emotional, intelligent,
intelligence and educational consultant, and thought leader, he is unlocking

(17:40):
the genius and blackmail students. I want to talk a
little bit about his black Mail Impact Project. Doctor Cross.
Blackmail Impact Project is to help change the narrative through
positive and insightful conversations with black men who value education,

(18:06):
self respect, entrepreneurship, and who are service oriented. This is
what our synergy go. Like I said, powerful and sightful conversations.
We must think about it, we must speak about it.
The goal is to provide for the Black impact. The
goal is to provide a positive perspective to the next generation,

(18:28):
especially for our young black males. And this is what
really hold up my heart strengths, because we have to
keep thinking about each generation. That's what we're here for,
not just cross them off, throw them away and said
it's just it's all over. Let's do our part to
provide positive perspective to the next generation.

Speaker 2 (18:52):
One of the primary focuses of the platform.

Speaker 5 (18:56):
Of doctor Cross's platform is to use it so that
young black youth can see black men as they should
and not limit themselves and what is possible to achieve.
Please check out the black Mail Impact on YouTube and connect.
If you're not connected, be a part of the initiative,

(19:18):
watch and join in on those conversations as well. Let
us not just talk about it, Let's be about it.
We can do things and it doesn't always take money.
It take your time. It could take your talent if
you don't have the treasure. All right, I'm about to
bring doctor Richard A Cross on stage.

Speaker 6 (19:38):
How are you well?

Speaker 9 (19:40):
I'm doing great, and thanks for the opportunity to be
here with you, Miss O'Kelly and Dr Westbrook.

Speaker 6 (19:50):
It's a pleasure to meeting you as well.

Speaker 9 (19:52):
But man, I'm looking forward to this conversation and I
really appreciate the introduction.

Speaker 6 (19:59):
So you and ready to dive into this conversation today. Again,
thanks for having me.

Speaker 5 (20:06):
Absolutely, I thank you both for being here. Thank you
for using your voice and using your time.

Speaker 2 (20:12):
Left.

Speaker 5 (20:13):
All right, so Breaking Free. Ask what we're going to
talk about here today, Breaking Free? How to take control
of your path and build a future on your terms.
That can mean so much to different people. And I
love that you both have such diverse experiences to bring,

(20:40):
you know, elevation to this conversation. With that what I
want to start with. There's going to be some questions
I'm going to ask. That's going to like just fall
into three different areas. But then we also may have
some comments. Oh I've missed this. When I see some
comments coming in right now? Okay, all right, that was
just applaud and we may have some comments or some
questions for you all. So we're going to go with

(21:02):
the flow wherever it takes us, Okay, But I want
to start out with and we're talking about just breaking free,
especially now, it feels like there's so many strongholds on us,
and even strongholds that I don't think a lot of
us even.

Speaker 2 (21:21):
Recognize we've had.

Speaker 5 (21:22):
It always takes something to happen to kind of expose
some wounds, some situations, some deep rooted things that need
to be worked on. COVID was one. We've seen something,
but just now, just now what everything going on. We
see that there's some strongholds mentally, emotionally, spiritually. So when

(21:47):
we're talking about breaking free, what beliefs and we can
start with you, Derek, what beliefs were you raised on
that you later realized was holding you back? And when
I said, we're going through that right now as climate,
especially when it came to like voting and who do

(22:08):
you stand for and who are you not for? It
was a lot of things that some people just make
decisions based on this is how I raised, I was raised.
If I do anything different, it's going to go a
gets the norm or vice versa. But what beliefs were
you raised with that you later realized was holding you back.

Speaker 7 (22:26):
I think one of the main things is I when
I was growing up, when we looked at the media
and when we looked in school, we did not see
ourselves reflected back to us. Right, So a lot of
the beliefs I had is that we didn't belong in
spaces of leadership.

Speaker 8 (22:40):
We didn't belong and in places where we can see ourselves.

Speaker 7 (22:46):
Shining and growing and leading and guiding, you know. So
it took a lot to break out of that shell.
In my home and my household, we were encouraged to
do all types of things. In my church, we were
encouraged to step up and do all types of things.
But when we came into the mainstream of society, the
roles sometimes were diminished. And so I think that trying

(23:10):
to break out of having that imposter syndrome and being
able to move in spaces and feel like you belong
in that you have something to bring to the table
was something that held me back, and I had to
learn to break out of and let myself be myself
in all spaces.

Speaker 5 (23:27):
So you necessarily the belief that was holding you back.
Wasn't necessarily something that you was raised on in the house.
It was society, it was television, was those things that
was raising you that and still these limited beliefs that
you later had to break free from. Is that what

(23:48):
you're saying?

Speaker 7 (23:49):
Definitely? You know when you look at TV, and especially
back growing up in the seventies and early eighties and
what was on TV and what images we had to
give us a sense of self, they were few and
far between. We actually ran to the TV when we
saw black TV, black people on it.

Speaker 8 (24:08):
And you know, I was raised in an area where.

Speaker 7 (24:14):
The educational system, the education I was getting did not
really I didn't see myself in it other than you know,
slavery being taught or those types of things. So when
you don't have those things to draw and you start
looking for ways to fill that, and you're always in
your mind saying, you know, I'm learning these things outside

(24:37):
of school, but it's not being reinforced in school. I
don't see it in these other spaces. So is it real?
Is it not? How do I navigate these spaces and
how do I feel like I belong in those spaces
where I'm absent or invisible.

Speaker 5 (24:52):
That is interesting that you say that, is it realers
or not because it's taught differently different spaces, Doctor Cross,
What about you? What belief were you raised on that
you later realized was holding you back.

Speaker 9 (25:03):
The belief that I was raised on was that, you know,
there are certain things that I couldn't do because you know,
for me, I grew up in Jamaica, so I didn't
grow up here.

Speaker 6 (25:13):
So for me growing up in Jamaica, didn't see the possibility.

Speaker 9 (25:17):
To be honest with you because we were kind of
put into a box based on your social status. So
you believe was you know, created around how you were socialized,
how people see you. So for a long time, I
didn't believe that I could come out of my situation,
which was poverty. So that's how I show up in spaces,
That's how I show up in school because I see

(25:39):
my parents doing domestic work and forming. So the belief
of breaking those cycle seems hard, and it was a
long time it Actually it was when I became an
adult I realized, you know, those limiting beliefs could have
been broken, which was kind of a typle of my
first book, Going Beyond Limitations, because I used to believe

(26:02):
that I was subjected to poverty. You know, I didn't
really have the luxury of being exposed to a lot
of things on TV because for many years of my life,
we didn't really have that luxury of watching TV or
watching some of the things. You know, there were parts
of my journey when I had TV, but you know,

(26:22):
I didn't have the exposure to certain things, to certain programs,
or when people had cable and they could watch and
see other people. But even my immediate environment, I didn't
really have a lot of black men to really model from,
you know, to see, oh, I wanted to be this person.
Yes there were black male teachers, but you know, based

(26:43):
on my social status and based on how I was
conditioned to believe about myself, I didn't see myself even
having the ability to become a teacher.

Speaker 6 (26:53):
So, you know, it was long on my.

Speaker 9 (26:55):
Journey where when I started to say, you know what,
actually it was when I actually here. But I think
things started to change for me in Jamaica, you know,
because I like to tell people even though I wasn't qualified,
I graduated high school and I went to college, and
I went to college on grace, you know, because that's
how I kind of stated, But I still went into

(27:17):
college in Jamaica out the same belief that I was
an average person. I literally go there to see my
way through because I believe that that's the only thing
I could get, because that's the belief that was put
on me. And even through those years, I was still
thinking I was limited. I was thinking that I couldn't

(27:37):
I couldn't achieve at ice level, and not until you know,
I got here in the States on a truck and
fee scholarship as well. But I know, as we go
on with this conversation and I we'll get more into
some of the challenges and some of the things that
I've overcome. But I used to believe what they told
me that I couldn't even today, to be honest with you,

(27:58):
my teachers who taught me in high school still wondering
what happened to the young man they knew, how did
you become this person? Because none of this that I
am today's even look possible.

Speaker 2 (28:13):
If I should say, well, you know what's amazing about
both of your answers, and this is why.

Speaker 5 (28:23):
As an athlete, I had the blessing and privilege to
travel the world, and I was able to even have
roommates from different parts of the country, and a lot
of that helped shape not just my belief, but my
eyes and my understanding because a lot of times we

(28:47):
think in this box. Like Derek just said, I watched
television and there was these narratives of lack of That's
where that limited belief came from. You said it, it's
not television. I actually seen it with my eyes out.
The limited belief what I want people to hear is
because sometime we think it's just this is just the problem.

Speaker 2 (29:10):
It's just this way.

Speaker 5 (29:12):
Everything is propaganda this way, but different parts of country,
different ways. It's happening in different manners of us being limited.
It's not just what you think is happening in the US.
Is different forms and fashions in different ways, and we

(29:34):
have to expand our mind on it's just there. It
doesn't matter where you at, it's just there. When I
say it's it is the opposition for you to be
your best you. So instead of holding on to I'm
in an unfortunate situation here, there's so many people that

(29:57):
found fortune and unfortunate situation. Unfortunate situation. So my next
question would be and Dot the cross. I want to
start with you if you can parse out that one lie,
that one lie that society that you feel society tells
people about just freedom, about ownership, whatever that may mean

(30:20):
that you had to stop believing in order for you
to attain what freedom is to you, with owning your
space is to you?

Speaker 2 (30:28):
What is that one lie that you can think.

Speaker 6 (30:30):
Of freedom and what it means to me and what
society have told me.

Speaker 2 (30:37):
That's a lie that you that you felt later, that's
a lie well.

Speaker 7 (30:42):
That.

Speaker 9 (30:44):
Overcoming my situation was not possible, to be honest with you,
That's how it was shown to me growing up in Jamaica,
Like it was difficult because one thing that we had
a hard time, you know, especially when you were poor.
We wouldn't get the support financially to go to college. Right,

(31:06):
so I think that it was going to be hard,
very difficult. It is still difficult or a bit challenging
to overcome our challenges, the what we were born into.
Then I realized that it's not just there to stop,
it's just being reinforced by our environment that it is impossible.

(31:28):
But with hard work and dedication and commitment and discipline
and finding that thing that you like and can give
yourself too. You can break those barriers. And that's how
I got out of my situation. There were guys there
who were more talented than I am, but they weren't
as discipline, And I realized that with discipline, I can overcome,

(31:54):
you know, that box that I was putting into because
I believe.

Speaker 6 (31:57):
That that was how my life was going to be.
But also when it comes.

Speaker 9 (32:02):
To you know, freedom, you know, we were all taught
that it was you know, these material things that we
need to have, you know, to show success. But then
I realized, you know, it's so choices. You know, I
can now make my choice despite of my situation. And
because I can make those choices, I can overcome whatever

(32:25):
limiting our box that I was placed in.

Speaker 2 (32:29):
That is powerful.

Speaker 5 (32:30):
So the lie you were told that it was impossible
to overcome for someone that come from your background, your environment,
it was going to be impossible for you to overcome that,
you kind of had to like accept that.

Speaker 2 (32:42):
That's the lie that was not just told to you
but shown to you.

Speaker 6 (32:47):
Oh yeah, you see it every day, you you see
and this is what's happening in our society.

Speaker 9 (32:53):
The limiting beliefs you know, we don't realize that it
Maybe it's a social construct, but it is continuous some
time by us.

Speaker 2 (33:03):
I don't want to say sometimes I want to say
majority of the time, I think.

Speaker 5 (33:10):
The seed is dropped. But a lot of things we
take and we nurture that seed. We grow it, we harvested.
See to just be dropped, we nurture it. Derek, What's
one lie society tells? What's one lie that society that
you feel society tells people about freedom and ownership that

(33:31):
you had to stop believing.

Speaker 7 (33:34):
I think I thought that freedom was the ability to
do whatever you want. Right as soon as I got
out of my parents' house, I'm gonna make my own choices,
I'm gonna do my own thing. And to me, freedom
was that that ability. But I found that freedom comes
with a sense of responsibility, and that freedom is empty
if you don't have a sense of identity and purpose.

(33:58):
You know, so a lot of times people are basking
in this ability to have choice, but they don't have
any sense of responsibility to understanding who they are and
what role or what purpose they have in this world.
This adulthood brings a certain amount of responsibility in ownership

(34:20):
and we don't always assume that mantle, and we always
sometimes want to continue to be taken care of. And
we can learn helplessness if we're not careful and not
break out of that immature or childish state where we
just want to do what we want to do and
not have anybody telling us anything, and not really take

(34:41):
responsibility for who we are and who we want to be,
and start to live our lives with that sense of
responsibility and that sense of purpose.

Speaker 2 (34:53):
I love it.

Speaker 5 (34:53):
I agree with you both. I have to say that's
the one life of meat. As society I believe tells
people is like freedom is that thing to attain, whereas
really freedom is that thing to be responsible with to
do things with. You're not just getting to whatever freedom is,

(35:17):
which we label as freedom of choice, freedom to do withever,
you know whatever, or we say even financial freedom. Right
I want to attain financial freedom mean is I never
have to worry about anything, any bill owing anything. And
the one thing I learned that was a lie with freedom.

Speaker 7 (35:34):
With that is.

Speaker 5 (35:36):
A lot of times happiness may not come with that.
You may be financially free to not worry about certain things,
but there's other things that magnify within a person if
you like. To your point, if you don't take care
of the person, that freedom doesn't equate happiness. That is
a lie that freedom, even that ownership doesn't. It's the freedom,

(36:02):
as doctor Carus said, to make choices.

Speaker 2 (36:05):
That's the thing.

Speaker 5 (36:06):
Choices to be the best me, Choices to whatever the
choices may be. That's where that happiness. Choice choice to
recognize I am happiness. And then what you do with
freedom not attain it, but what you do with freedom
can be absolutely amazing.

Speaker 2 (36:22):
I did a talk.

Speaker 5 (36:25):
Ted X and it was deconstructing social engineering, just talking
about how we are programmed. And The Wiz is my
all time favorite movie. I play it over and over again.
People in my house, I'll play it again. It came
on Netflix, and I watch it during things, a game.
I watch it when it dropped because The Wiz has

(36:45):
so many gems. If you just every time you watch it,
more is elevated. But just social engineering to me is
the Wiz saying that we need to go to this
Wiz to get these things that we already have, instead
of realizing we have it in us.

Speaker 2 (37:04):
So, Derek, what do you believe it really takes to.

Speaker 5 (37:09):
Like d program in our minds, to d program that
mindset of just staying safe, or possibly I need to
stay small. You mentioned a word earlier about the imposter syndrome.
I believe you had said, and that's kind of you know,
you stay small because you don't know if I belong,

(37:30):
I don't belong.

Speaker 2 (37:32):
That's a lot of people deal with that.

Speaker 5 (37:33):
But sometime just breaking fee period, you know, culturally, maybe
I need to stay small. If we talk about religion, right,
there's some religions that to me, this is Alakeisha's opinion
misinterpret you know, attaining the kingdom or whatever it may be.
And it's like it's evil to be big, to go big,

(37:57):
whether it's financially or anything else. So a lot of
people stay small, don't want to do too much. Let's
stay safe. I'm going to vote the same way all
the time, Like what do we what would it really
take for us to deprogram to stay safe, stay small
type mindset in order to break free?

Speaker 2 (38:15):
And that was for you, Derek, no problem.

Speaker 7 (38:19):
There's two things I probably want to say to that,
and the first is that I was taught by one
of my mentors that there's no eye.

Speaker 8 (38:25):
In the absolute sense of the word see.

Speaker 7 (38:28):
When we think of ourselves as an individual and we
don't see our interdependence, our interconnectedness to each other, to
the environment, to this world in which we live in,
we can feel very small and isolated because we have
bought into.

Speaker 8 (38:45):
The illusion that we are alone in this world.

Speaker 7 (38:48):
But we are born into this world already connected to family,
already connected, already having the benefit of being immune to
diseases that affected people before us, that was passed on
to us. So we're intimately interconnected. We're standing on the
shoulders of our ancestors, We're connecting with the people around

(39:09):
us by the very nature of asking a question, in
attempting to learn, we are reaching out for connection with
other people. And this notion that safety is the absence
of a threat really belies a deeper understanding that safety
is the presence of connection. It's realizing that we are
connected in an interdependent universe to everything that is. Neil

(39:34):
deGrasse Tyson often talks about how the same you know
elements that are in the stars are inside our bodies,
that we're part of something much greater. And when you
see yourself as part of something much greater, then you
cannot be small anymore. You cannot hide who you are.
You want to reach out and connect with others and

(39:56):
share your gifts and become more a part of the
world in which you live. And so coming to that realization,
once you get that out of the box, you can
never put that back in. So for me, it's important
to say that you are not an eye in the
absolute sense of the world. That you are connected. We
are interdependent. We're here to elevate each other, as you

(40:17):
had mentioned earlier, and to bring the best out in
each other. That is our way that we should be
in this world. And there are so many forces that
are trying to get us to isolate and to separate
from one another, that don't want us to connect because
they know how powerful we can be if we came
together and realize that we are the solution that we're

(40:38):
looking for in each other. So for me, it's getting
rid of that notion that we are individual self, separate
and apart from all these people. No, we're connected to
others and we need to learn to have healthy relationships
and connect to each other.

Speaker 2 (40:53):
And I think a lot of people know this because.

Speaker 5 (40:59):
To make individual feel like they don't have control or
they're losing control. The attack is in the division of
the people to make it feel like you are silent.
We are attacking each other as if we're standing individually
and we're in survival mode instead of thriving mode. So

(41:19):
that attack to divide us. And then, like you just mentioned,
you have to feel like or know that you're part
of something bigger. And to be honest with you, going
back to I brought up earlier from a religious aspect,
there's a lot of times when I sit back, I'm
just an observer. I'd like to sit back and just
just watch what's going on. I try not to connect
too much in it, but just watch and meditate on it.

(41:41):
A lot of times I see the vision or I
see a lot of fear. It comes from those individuals
who say they are or they be there, you know,
a part of something bigger. So I don't know if
saying it was one is one thing and believing it
is another. But a lot of divisions coming from certain

(42:02):
religions period. Were you supposed to be a part of
something there and that part is troubling for me. Doctor Richard,
what about you, Well, you know.

Speaker 9 (42:10):
Just to that point that you just made, uh, you know, uh,
some people are participating in indirectly social engineering, not knowing
that they are part of the problem that continues. So
they're doing things unconsciously because they have been conditioned to
think that way. But to answering your question about the

(42:34):
program and mindset and safe.

Speaker 6 (42:37):
Stay safe and stay small.

Speaker 9 (42:40):
For me, and as I said, you know my mindset
change late in life or whether I've been somewhat a
rebel even though I was still confined to my limiting beliefs.
So I was the one who still would do things
within my space. Not say I could come out of it,

(43:04):
but I would still do something. There's some things different
you know from my peers. But for me on learning
was one of the biggest part of it, and being
around people who could help me to change the way
that I was raised on.

Speaker 6 (43:20):
The limiting beliefs.

Speaker 9 (43:21):
And not all those people that people that I've met
were in the physical sense. It was when I started
reading I start to see a pattern where how I
was raised was not just because I was supposed to
raise that way. It was part of the conditioning of

(43:43):
people in this part of the culture, this part of
the world, whatever it is, because we're all conditioned based
on our environment. So I realized that I had to
develop a new perspective. And some of those perspectives started
to come from individuals that I was reading their material.

Speaker 6 (44:01):
Even when I came across Les Brown, I got a
book that was even.

Speaker 9 (44:06):
Older than I am, and I was like, how I
didn't hear about this kind of thinking before now? And
this book was written before I was born, That's what
I'm saying. So to learn their perspective on what was
possible helped me to come out of that small thinking
that limiting belief of myself. So learning different perspectives, being

(44:30):
around other people helped me to d program how I
was conditioned to believe about myself and what is possible
for me. And a lot of times one of my
peer said to me, because I was saying, man, you
know what, I maybe need to read more books on

(44:50):
you know, African struggles and how African American or how
just black people have struggled. But I told him that, man,
I've been reading more books on on personal development. That's
where I started, you know, not so much on our struggle,
but how to break free, how to tap into what's within.

(45:10):
And he said to me, man, you know those are
the books you may need to read first, because if
you getness, get so caught up in the struggle, you
may stay there and be conditioned, you know, just to be.

Speaker 6 (45:26):
Reacting to what's going on.

Speaker 9 (45:29):
So understanding myself and how I could tap into my
potential helped me to overcome some of the challenges and
realize that I don't have to, you know, stay within
the confinement of how society told me that I could
be as a black male, what's possible for me? And
I try every single day to defy those odds and

(45:51):
tell other black men especially that they don't have to
limit themselves to what society says. Just as doctor you know, Derek,
as I said, where impost of syndrome. That also is
a result of us thinking we have to stay small.
We have done so much to be wherever we want

(46:12):
to be, but yet still we go in those places
are spaces and think we don't belong even though we
have done the work. That's also a part of us
being conditioned to think we don't belong there, or are
we more than belong in those spaces because we have
done the work, and for most of us, we have

(46:32):
done twice the work to be in those spaces, and
yet we go in there feelings if we don't belong,
and we get there because we have done not just
the average amount of work, but more than the average
to be there, you know.

Speaker 6 (46:50):
So you know that was for me.

Speaker 9 (46:51):
I have to learn your perspective from others, you know,
just to tap into my own belief and stop believing.
They told me that I was not capable of doing,
and which I said earlier. You know that came late
on my journey.

Speaker 5 (47:09):
Derek, do you want to add to even my last
comment I said about the or anything that doctor Cross
has said.

Speaker 2 (47:16):
Do you want to add anything to that?

Speaker 7 (47:18):
Yes? Because as an educator, we talk about learning a lot,
you know, and it's important to be aware of our
ability to gain knowledge and to learn. And it's equally
important to make sure we're aware of our emotional state
because our belief and our commitment often gets blocked when

(47:40):
we get hurt. I have my youngest daughter when her
feelings are hurt, you know, her impulse is to run
into her room and to hide, you know, and to
be alone with her emotion, which is we say, that's
not healthy. For you need to be in community, you
need to be in connection with others, the time when
you're most vulnerable, the time when you need to be

(48:01):
connected to others so that you can process and work
through things and not be mired in what you're feeling.
You know, and she teaches me in a lot of ways,
because that impulse to run and hide when things get difficult,
that impulse to not engage when people hurt our feelings,
that impulse to say that we don't need to form

(48:23):
community because of the attitudes or the things that we're confronting,
can make us go inside of ourselves and to seek
that being alone and instead of reaching out and connecting
with other people. And so sometimes we may believe these things,
but our emotional state might not be caught up with

(48:45):
our intellectual state, and that may hinder us from taking
full advantage of the moment, not because we don't know
what to do, but because we don't feel we're not
in control of our feelings and we're not being able
to navigate in that way. So it's important that we
not only focus on our intellectual development, but our emotional

(49:08):
development as well, because that's usually what is easiest to
get a hold of us.

Speaker 5 (49:16):
I love that you said that, because I want to
go into the talk about emotional intelligence, but I completely
agree with you.

Speaker 2 (49:22):
Both are saying one that trickery of.

Speaker 5 (49:26):
Being isolated, like there's no growth in that. We need
the dirt, we need the water, we need the sun,
we need it all right in order for us to flourish.
We're not it all We need it coming from different ways.
And I too broke free from a lot of just
different things by surrounding myself with books, with talks, conversations, interview.

(49:53):
You don't have to so people say I don't have
it in my reach, I don't have this around. It's everywhere.
It's everywhere, And like you said, Les Brown, finding individuals
like that, but also sometime us humbling ourselves and hearing from.

Speaker 2 (50:09):
A different ear of people even around us.

Speaker 5 (50:12):
There's a lot of things that I learned later hearing
from someone else that made me go back and say,
I heard this, I heard this at home. I heard
this from my mother, or I heard this from my father,
I heard this from whatever, in conversation, whatever it is,
it's humbling ourselves and receiving what we're hearing and not

(50:32):
always shooting down the messenger but taking the message. So
sometimes we even have it around us, but we have
to get out of that blockage. So I love what
you both said. So going into emotional intelligence, what are
some doctor Craft's personal checking systems that you have developed
when you feel disconnected, you feel like you want to

(50:54):
be solo or not be a part, and you feel
just disconnected from your vision or person bis if you
ever do what are some personal check ins that you
that you have come up with.

Speaker 9 (51:06):
Well, you know, I don't really have been like often
feel disconnected from my purpose, but I do often remind
myself why I'm doing it. So the why for me,
you know, especially if I'm trying to do something and
you know, getting into roadblocks and things are not happening
as fast as I want it to be, I sit

(51:29):
back and remind myself why am I doing this? Because
if I don't remind myself and makes suc come to
the challenge that is in front of me, I realize
that there are certain things that I will not be
able to control, and that's what I have to accept.

Speaker 6 (51:46):
So it doesn't matter how much.

Speaker 9 (51:48):
I've done, you know, how long I'm doing the work,
or how hard I'm going or the effort that I'm
putting out all I can control is what I do,
and that is what I have to remind myself at
times and also remind myself why I started this journey
in the first place, because there are things that I

(52:09):
were not able to control. And if I allow the
things that I cannot control to take root within me,
then you know, I start to lose my focus, my
purpose and what my intention is when it comes to doing,
you know, the work for me, so my why and
look back and sometimes remind myself that I am not

(52:31):
in control of everything that I would want to see happen.

Speaker 2 (52:34):
See you're at that state where you can do that.
What would you give?

Speaker 5 (52:38):
What would you give as mental food for young black
males who may be struggling and feel disconnected with vision,
with purpose? Why am I even here, like just living
day to day possibly even questioning day to day? Especially now,

(53:01):
what is it that you can give them as mental
fool to even understand this thing of the why and
the intention?

Speaker 2 (53:09):
Like what direction?

Speaker 6 (53:13):
And that's a great question for those who may not.

Speaker 9 (53:20):
What I encourage, like especially when I go places to
speak and I'm talking about go and be on limitations.
I always tell especially young people, you know, if they
don't have or know what their purpose is.

Speaker 6 (53:31):
I always remind them.

Speaker 9 (53:33):
To identify what they're good at, because the thing you're
good at can also lead to what your purpose is
tied to. It may not be your purpose, but it
can lead you to So identify the things that you're
good at, because once you're doing something that you're good at,
it gives your life meaning and with that meaning, it

(53:53):
may take you to a door that puts you on
a path to do something else more purposeful. But if
you don't start with what you love, identify. We all
have gifts, we all have talents. We can all start there.
That's what started it for me.

Speaker 6 (54:12):
It was track.

Speaker 9 (54:13):
I was one of the best athlete in my community
growing up. I realized that I wasn't doing well academically
at that point, I didn't see myself really going to
college right but track and field, to me, could open
the door. I trained in the morning, I trained in
the evening. I was the only one at times training
and that led me to a scholarship to go to

(54:35):
GC Foster College, and from GC Faster College, I didn't stop.
I didn't get what everybody else was giving out. I
ended up becoming a police officer. Right, but I still
continue doing track. Track was the thing for me, that
was where I saw my strength, my purpose, and it
led to getting a scholarship to come to the States.

(54:57):
So I always encouraged to start with the thing you're
a good at because that thing will give you meaning
and it can lead to you know, a doore that
may even change your life more than you could even imagine.
And that's what happened for me, you know, growing up
in poverty, dear, is a lot of things that I
didn't know would be possible, But track and feel my

(55:18):
first love of things that I can do. You know,
I give that everything I got and let me to here.

Speaker 5 (55:26):
Derek, So with your personal check in system when you
feel disconnected from your vision or purpose, and then like
I just ask and follow up question from that after
you answer your personal thing, what is some advice that
you can give individuals who do feel disconnected, not just
sometimes they just feel disconnected. They don't even know what

(55:48):
vision me, they don't wann know what purposed me, So
the two. So start with your personal check in and
then your general advice.

Speaker 8 (55:55):
Definitely, I always say that.

Speaker 7 (55:58):
It's all part of the right. When we were on
the track, when we ran track and we're athletes and
we played a game, I said, well, you can lose,
but don't let them beat you. It's okay to lose.

Speaker 8 (56:13):
Those are learning experiences.

Speaker 7 (56:15):
I think a lot of times we think we have
to be undefeated through the whole thing. You know that
we think progress is this linear and progressive stage that
we move and if I lose, or if I fall back,
or if I feel lost or lose my direction, that
somehow I need to feel guilty because I'm not making progress.

(56:35):
When I teach history, I always say history is filled
of regress and progress. You have to be able to
find balance in it all. And it's okay to lose
because it helps us to appreciate winning. A person who
never lost anything doesn't have any real appreciation for what
they have or what they earned. You know, so when

(56:57):
you do finally make it, those tears of joy that
you express our part and parcel of the struggles that
you went through to get there, that you're remembering all
those times you lost, all those lessons learned, All those
things were for a purpose to get you to this point.
And I think one of the issues that we have
the most difficulty with is grief. A lot of us

(57:21):
don't know how to process grief. When we have a
significant loss in our lives, we're going to be filled
with sadness. That separation, that that sense of confusion, that
dysphoya that comes with losing someone or something that was
important to us is going can be crippling. We can
go through all of these stages of bargaining and what

(57:44):
it should have could as in all of these different
things in questioning our own existence. But what all of
that is doing is bringing you back to yourself. The separation,
that sense of alienation that you feel, it's that darkness
that is calling you toward It's the light. You're not
gonna be able to perceive the light until things are
a little bit.

Speaker 8 (58:03):
Dark around you.

Speaker 7 (58:05):
That you can now come back to your purpose with
a greater sense of renewed purpose, with renewed joy. Because
grief doesn't just bring sadness. It brings a desire or
motivation to reattach and to grow to another level so
that we can replace that which we lost. So to me,

(58:25):
it's saying it's all one of my mentors just to
always say it's all good, you know, don't worry about it.
When I complain, because it's all.

Speaker 8 (58:32):
Teaching you something, you're learning.

Speaker 7 (58:34):
You're gonna come back to this better. So it's all
part of the process. Let the process work its way
out that grief, that loss, that emptiness, that separation is
leading you back to yourself. Embrace it and work through it.
Don't run or hide from it, but admit it, connect
with it, and learn from it and talk to others

(58:56):
about it so that you can move to that next
process that is your breakthrough is waiting. But a lot
of times we don't go there because we let that
that loss sort of fill us with guilt and shame
so that we can't come out of it on the
other side.

Speaker 8 (59:13):
But there is another side. It's all good.

Speaker 2 (59:16):
No, I love that.

Speaker 5 (59:18):
I love that outlast. Whatever process you're in, it's all phases.
There was something I was listening to before that says,
don't skip the steps, like take each take each step
in the staircase, because on each step there's something for
you to get. If you go from step one and
try to jump a step forward, you miss what there
was to get between two to three. And that's life

(59:41):
in general. Every process that we're going through is bringing
us closer to ourselves. I love that because we don't
know what story, how it's going to connect. So the
goal is, if I'm hearing you correctly, Derek, is to
just outlast that thing, that process, and not to outlast it,
but embrace whatever it is and learn from whatever it

(01:00:04):
is that you're supposed to learn from during that phase
of that process. Is that the advice that you're saying
for anyone externally.

Speaker 7 (01:00:12):
Definitely one of the things that feels awkward to people.
When I was learning how to box, when somebody smacks
you in the face, the first thing you're going to
a lot of people do is turn away, and it's like, oh, Node,
I just got hit. But the reaction that you're supposed
to have is to turn into it and to face it,
because that way your defenses are up and that you're

(01:00:33):
able to come back on it. And you learn that
if you want to be a warrior, if you're going
to fight, you're going to have to turn into two difficulty,
not turn away from it. You turn your back, somebody's
going to be really rain and blows on it. Life
will really rain blows on you if we run it.
Turn and run, you know. So we need to learn
to turn into difficulty and turn and work our way
through it. There is another side to it, yes, definitely.

Speaker 2 (01:00:56):
And I love how.

Speaker 5 (01:00:59):
Dana, I hope I pronounced that correctly said that you know,
absolutely self control and awareness of your emotion is key.
So got the cross, like, what role has just self awareness?
We talked about, you know, control of our emotion, but
self awareness and what does that even mean to you?
Define that for us, what that means to you and

(01:01:19):
then let me know how that has played its role
in helping you to like just take control of your life.

Speaker 6 (01:01:27):
Well. To be honest with you, I.

Speaker 9 (01:01:31):
I was a bit self aware before I know what
self awareness is because you know, as I said earlier,
I realized that I was good at track, I was
doing it.

Speaker 6 (01:01:45):
So when I learned that what I'm good at that's
what I'm supposed to do, I dive into it.

Speaker 9 (01:01:54):
And when I become aware of more of my ability
that are beneficial to me, our abilities that are beneficial
to me and that can benefit others, I do more
of it.

Speaker 6 (01:02:04):
So that awareness, you know, helped me to on earth,
you know, get the.

Speaker 9 (01:02:10):
Things that's in me out because the more I tap
into my ability, the more I nurture what I found
out about myself, the better I become at it. The
same thing with writing. People would think today that I'm
always a writer. This writing thing came late on my journey.

(01:02:34):
I hated writing well to me because I didn't believe.

Speaker 6 (01:02:37):
That I could so.

Speaker 9 (01:02:38):
But once I started, I started when I was at
college that I could put the words together, you know,
more so from a portry sunpoint. And you know, once
I start to do it, and the more I do it,
and I started to get the feedback from those who
are listening or reading it, I say, you know what,
maybe I need to nurture this. So once I understand

(01:03:00):
my ability, I put more effort into it. But you know,
self awareness for me really change.

Speaker 6 (01:03:09):
How I show up in the world.

Speaker 9 (01:03:11):
I start to show up as myself and my ability
unapologetically about it.

Speaker 6 (01:03:19):
Once I become.

Speaker 9 (01:03:20):
Aware of what I'm supposed to do, so whatever ability
I have, I have no problem now sharing it with
the world. And you know, once we can do that,
you know, most of the limitations that have been placed
on us will break those limitations because now I'm not
showing up based on what other people may think. I'm
showing up based on who I realize I am and

(01:03:43):
share up with the world without thinking of whatever the
world want to say. They can say, I'm going to
show up in my ability, my strength and give as
much as possible to you know, the world.

Speaker 2 (01:03:57):
I love that.

Speaker 7 (01:03:59):
I love that.

Speaker 2 (01:03:59):
That goes back, like you said, imposter syndrome.

Speaker 5 (01:04:02):
I think imposter means something that's someone that's not They
don't belong here, You're an impostor, you don't belong for me,
because I had that question before and I really didn't
connect with it, understand it personally because I've always worked
on self awareness of who I am, trying to learn
more of who I am and learning that and that

(01:04:25):
being revealed wherever I showed up, and however I showed up,
it wasn't it was not an impostor. So I couldn't
feel or connect with an imposter syndrome. I think, and
this is just me.

Speaker 2 (01:04:39):
People who feel that way possibly are doubting.

Speaker 5 (01:04:45):
Who they are at that time showing up, because when
you know who you are at that time showing up,
there isn't an impost So for me, that was self awareness,
and that's how you know, I use self awareness to
just move in this world Derek, what about you.

Speaker 7 (01:05:05):
I always say I have to recognize three things in
any moment about myself. I am like all people, I
am like some people, and I am like no one.
All those things are true in the same moment. I
have to recognize my humanity and my connection with other people.

(01:05:26):
I have to recognize my social and cultural identity. And
you know, my family and my community and where I
was raised, and my beliefs about how those you know,
how I was nurtured in the world, how it was
socialized to be as a man, as an African American man,
as an athlete, as a father, as all those things.

(01:05:47):
And I am, Derek, you know, very unique, and I
don't have to choose between those realities. Some people want
to live in this colorblind world where we're all human,
we all bleed read, and that is true. But we
are also part of cultural communities and we are also individuals.
So I don't have to represent all black people all
the time. That's not my job. My job is to

(01:06:09):
be me. But I also recognize I'm part of that
group as well. So it's finding that balance and knowing
that I am the the things at once, and I
don't have to choose between them. I don't have to
put down one to be another. I am an inherently human.
I am inherently part of cultural communities and have a
social identity that is born of my community connections. And

(01:06:31):
I am also, Derek, you know, my individual self, and
I can show up as that in any space. And
recognizing and embracing that was important to me because sometimes people,
I think, feel they have to choose am I black,
Am I a man? Or this? Or I that you know?
And we get try to break ourselves down into these pieces,

(01:06:54):
and we're a whole person, and we have to allow
ourselves to stay whole in any space.

Speaker 5 (01:06:59):
And you know, you're the one I learned the African
proverb from when you taught us in class.

Speaker 2 (01:07:07):
I am because we are. We are because I am,
And that has.

Speaker 5 (01:07:13):
Like literally been the foundation of which everything has grown up.
I mean, there are some things that just are so
impactful and memorable in one's life. And your class was
one because, like you said, I the spaces I showed
up I didn't learn. If I learned anything about what

(01:07:33):
I was connected to, it was always the same repetitive story,
same repetitive story. But learning from you, I learned that
I was connected to something much bigger, and that alone
helps with self awareness, unlimiting beliefs, and going for it.
I stand on the back of greatness, and I am

(01:07:55):
because we are. We are because I am is a
great responsibility. I'm Vonda acts to repeat?

Speaker 2 (01:08:00):
Can you repeat that? You said, I'm like some I'm
like no one. What's the third thing you said?

Speaker 7 (01:08:07):
It's just like I'm like all people. I am like
some people, and I am like no one else all
at the same time.

Speaker 2 (01:08:17):
That's it's like the epitome of I am. That is
like the pit I mean, I am all right, So
right now we see.

Speaker 5 (01:08:29):
Conversations going on that appears logical, especially on LinkedIn, Right,
that's supposed to be supposed to be logic. But I'm
spout anywhere anywhere with your family, workplace, industries, platforms, everyone
has logic.

Speaker 2 (01:08:47):
But how do you distinguish between.

Speaker 5 (01:08:51):
Fear dressed in logic in this in truth and real intuition?
How how do you distinguish that if you're having conversations
with individuals or if you're conversing How do you distinguish
the two and how do you deal with it when
you identify it?

Speaker 2 (01:09:09):
Doctor cross.

Speaker 6 (01:09:11):
Huh, that's a great question. Logic and fear, logic and intuition.

Speaker 5 (01:09:20):
Yeah, So distinguish between that that that truth, that intuition,
the thing that's there, and fear that's opposed to fear
that's dressed and logic. Like a lot of people, we
break it down, but that's really feared the skies and logic,
but it's really fear.

Speaker 1 (01:09:39):
You know.

Speaker 9 (01:09:39):
I've been of lately trying to really analyze and observe
because when you look at what individuals are saying and
what they're doing, sometimes are different. And you know, so

(01:10:00):
I can say to you anything I want to say,
but my actions may not follow. So how do I analyze,
if you know, the difference between intuition, uh and fear.
Intuition to me are I think it's a bit more

(01:10:24):
calmer or clear. You know, when someone I think have
a better understanding of the situation, they tend to be
a little bit clearer with what they want and fear
to me, you know, they may be.

Speaker 6 (01:10:43):
Anxious about what's happening currently, you know.

Speaker 9 (01:10:47):
So they may be saying I'm going to do this
because of this, you know, because of what's happening, not
doing it because of what I want to do that will.

Speaker 6 (01:10:56):
Bring forth a certain result. That was my perspective because
you know, I believe that, you know, we have been
conditioned to be more reactive, you know, based on what's
happening around us.

Speaker 9 (01:11:09):
And if we want real change or we want to
see things happen, especially within our community or breaking free,
you know, we have to you know, do things that
will benefit us despite what's going on. I'm not going
to react, and we cannot and should not continue to
react to what's happening because that's a response. Maybe we

(01:11:33):
have been trained too. I'm just responding because of this
conditioning or these circumstances. Is this what I really want
to do? Or am I going to do what I
believe will move us forward despite what's going on? So
sometimes I do look at individuals who are responding, you know,

(01:11:54):
because that could be out of fear not intuition, you know.
So if that's all they do, if this is happening,
and if you're not doing this thing that you're doing
when this is not happening or this circumstances or this situation,
that means you may not be doing it because you
genuinely want to do it. You're responding. So for me,

(01:12:15):
if I have the intuition that this thing that I
do can make a difference regardless of what's happening, I'm
going to do what I believe will make a difference,
regardless of.

Speaker 6 (01:12:28):
Who is around, or what is happening, or what someone
else is saying.

Speaker 9 (01:12:34):
But that takes courage because that's sometimes you will have
to go against the grain, And a lot of people
are not willing to go against the grain when it
comes to because then if you're going to trust your intuition, right,
that means what you do may not always be in
alignment with what's common.

Speaker 6 (01:12:54):
So we have to look at it.

Speaker 9 (01:12:56):
Am I trusting my intuition or am I upper reading
all the fear? And sometimes we have to ask ourselves
those questions because it's about breaking free, and breaking free
is not always about staying within the norm. It oftentimes
is going against the norm, and we have to say,

(01:13:16):
am I willing to go against the grain, go against
the norm despite what's happening around it. So that's how
I kind of analyze it and look at individuals. But
before I even go further, doctor Westbrook, I like that
book in the background with those two big red words.

Speaker 8 (01:13:39):
Most definitely, Yes, sir, yes, sir.

Speaker 7 (01:13:44):
Yeah, that's one of my favorite texts by one of
my favorite psychologists.

Speaker 8 (01:13:49):
So I always keep it close by.

Speaker 6 (01:13:53):
That's right, get the energy from it even when you're
not reading it.

Speaker 2 (01:13:57):
I have to get it now, I get it mine.
Oh yeah, you need to one, Derek, what about you?
What about.

Speaker 6 (01:14:10):
You?

Speaker 9 (01:14:10):
Know?

Speaker 7 (01:14:10):
To me, fear is whenever we face uncertainty about what's
about to happen next. Fear is that message that's gonna
be bad, that there's unimpending doom coming. You know, as
an athlete, when I used to have to run the
four hundred hurdles in particular, right before the race, until

(01:14:33):
that gun went off, everything in my body was telling
me to run away. All the doubts and fears and
insecurity would flood my mind in this non stop way
that I would just hear, you're not gonna you're not
gonna do well. This, this is all the negative things
that could possibly come up about that race. We're flooding

(01:14:54):
my mind. And so fear is like that. It's these
things that want you to run and hide in, not
go outside of your comfort zone, and not grow and learn,
And it's all these things that are trying to pull
you back, you know, but when that gun went off,
all that stuff left immediately because that was the time

(01:15:18):
to commit. Fear will keep you from committing, or make
you half step or quit. You know, what we want
to do through our intuition. One of my mentors said,
intuition is knowledge without words. You know, it requires a
little bit of faith to rely on the things that
we know to be true and to step out and

(01:15:40):
commit to those things without question. You know, because when
we do that, all of a sudden, we're off to
the races, and you know, when that gun went off,
I would focus in on my race and nothing else
mattered except what I was supposed to execute. And we
want that type of clarity and that type of energy

(01:16:02):
when we're trying to compete, when we're trying to collaborate,
when we're trying to cooperate with each other, when we're
trying to build together. We want that positivity. We don't
want people who are uncertain and worrying about things going wrong.
It's not the time for that. The time. There's no
time when you're in the middle of a fight to

(01:16:23):
think about fear or hesitation. It's time to be committed,
you know, So it's getting used to going through that
process of dealing with that factor. There's a YouTube video
called the ten foot Tower or ten meter Tower, and
they're asking people to jump off of this tower into
the water and it's about thirty something feet down and

(01:16:46):
people are looking over the edge and you get to
see how each person faces their fear and comes up
with this idea about how they're going to move forward
and commit and jump. And I think we all go
through that process of trying to figure out out how
we're going to move forward, commit and jump, you know,
And that's where intuition has to take over and that

(01:17:08):
belief that we are going to be committed and move
forward and that fear can take a back seat. But
fear will always tell you to run away. It will
always tell you to hide, it will always make excuses,
it will always tell you to quit. And that energy
can be debilitating and paralyzing. You mentioned a paralysis of analysis.
It will get us caught up and what it should

(01:17:29):
have cut us, and never about what is and what
we should be doing and living in the now. So yeah,
that to me is where I make the distinction and
how we have to wrestle with fear. Courage is doing
it despite your fear. And we need that stop, that

(01:17:50):
starter's pistol to go off in our head to make
us switch and flip that switch and move into that
committed zone where we're just relying on our intuition and
letting things play out.

Speaker 5 (01:18:01):
You both gave some amazing gems on this this part
I hope people get. I'm gonna put that on replay, replay, replay,
because like Vanda said, you know, so it goes back
to facing your fear head on, don't shrink away. But
what you all just gave, it's first about identifying that
it is fear, and you gave a way to identify

(01:18:23):
it from some of those fruits. And I would like
to add, you know, anger, you know, defensiveness, if all
of that is, and whatever we're spewing out as this
being logical, it's it's disguise. It's fear disguise and logic
for those things. So I love that you gave those gems. Again,
I'm gonna put that on replay so we can sit
step back and say, am I operating in fear based

(01:18:47):
or intuition based right now? And is it matching what
I'm saying, what I'm doing, Am I reacting or responding?
I completely love that.

Speaker 2 (01:18:58):
Speaking of a fear.

Speaker 5 (01:19:01):
Which keeps a lot of us in strongholds and can't
break free, is being bound right to these cultural expectations.

Speaker 2 (01:19:13):
How do you balance honoring your roots.

Speaker 5 (01:19:18):
While not letting these cultural expectations like box you in
in your decision making.

Speaker 2 (01:19:26):
But not feel like you're.

Speaker 5 (01:19:29):
I don't know, cutting your roots or going against it
or whatever it is. I want to start with you, Derek,
being not to somebody who's history in African American studies
and all that. Speaking of cultural expectations, how do you
balance honoring your roots while not letting that keep you
in your decision making process?

Speaker 7 (01:19:51):
Well, I think first we have to view culture as
something that's living and not something that's dead. A lot
of times culture is a process that's a living process.
A lot of times we viewed as something frozen or
this box that we have to do it this particular way,
or that we have to romanticize some way in the

(01:20:12):
past that it was done and have to bring drag
that forward, and that if we don't do it that way,
we're not doing it according to our culture. But culture
is a living, breathing thing. And one of my mentors
used to say that our education, which is our way
of our culture reproducing itself, is meant to reproduce and

(01:20:32):
refine the best of who we are. So in acting
in and around our culture, we're taking the best of
what we have and saying, hey, this is good. We're
going to reproduce this. You know what, I think we
can fix this up and revise it for today's time.
And this is a process that we're constantly part of

(01:20:53):
is taking the best of who we are, reproducing, refining it,
and passing it on to the next generation. So we
don't get caught up in the box. You know, sometimes
we can freeze people. I used to get upset with
some of my professors who would say, like, oh, I
like the post Mecca Malcolm, or I like this person.

(01:21:14):
You know, we freeze who they are in this time
and space and don't look at their entire journey. You know,
don't fall in love with Mary Jay when she was
just you know, you know, having a rough time. But
when she's happy and making up words, you should be
happy with her too. Like there's a journey that people
go through. Fall in love with the artists, not just
the art, you know, we want to see how our

(01:21:37):
culture evolves and lives and thrives instead of trying to
break it down into pieces that we're trying to imitate
or mimic or put out there as something that's not
a living thing. We don't want appropriation or people to mimic,
but we want to be able to live and breathe

(01:21:57):
and be able to make choices about what's best for
us and how we want to adapt it to our
current situation and pass it on so we don't get
trapped not to cross.

Speaker 6 (01:22:11):
Well, I really like that question.

Speaker 9 (01:22:15):
I do embrace the values that really uplift me, resilience, community,
and purpose, but I also reject what will limit me
because we grew up in an environment where we have
been placed, where limitations and stereotypes.

Speaker 6 (01:22:32):
And labels have been placed on us.

Speaker 9 (01:22:34):
So for me, embracing the roots is embracing the values
that uplifts me, which is resilient, community, and purpose. So
for me to pass it on, as doctor Westbrook stated,
you know, our culture, our roots, is not something that's
just there. It is continuous and it's on us, you know,

(01:22:55):
to build on what our ancestors have put in front
of us is not to just stand there and hold
their legacy up, but to build on their legacy, to
show the world that through those who have gone before us, we.

Speaker 6 (01:23:12):
Can evolve and become greater.

Speaker 9 (01:23:15):
Because I like to tell black men that, you know, yes,
it's great to talk about our ancestors and the greatness
that they have done.

Speaker 6 (01:23:22):
What will those who come after us talk about us?
We should build on those legacy.

Speaker 9 (01:23:28):
Whatever excellence, whatever greatness you know, they share, they have achieved.

Speaker 6 (01:23:35):
Now it's on us to build on it.

Speaker 9 (01:23:39):
The resilience, the community, the purpose, all that which we
have done. The resourcefulness, you know, that's part of our roots,
that's part of our ancestors, you know what they have done.

Speaker 6 (01:23:55):
So for me, I'm going to take.

Speaker 9 (01:23:57):
What uplifts me and rejects what limits me. Because we
should evolve. We should not stay within the confinement of
what may have stopped those before us from achieving what.

Speaker 6 (01:24:13):
They wanted to.

Speaker 9 (01:24:14):
As we have heard this saying I am my ancestor's
wildest dream. So we know are in position to achieve
and should achieve more than they achieved. So that's you
know how I look at it. I honor it by
becoming the best me possible and hold myself accountable to

(01:24:36):
that and those who are close to me, because it's
on us. And there's a quote that really resonated with me,
and I share this quote almost every time that I'm
in conversation with individuals that the conscious must help the
unconscious to become conscious. We are responsible to take what

(01:25:01):
was given to us and help others to realize.

Speaker 6 (01:25:04):
That it is possible and even more, it's possible to accomplish.

Speaker 5 (01:25:09):
I I love that because, like you said, one of
our things that you hear so many people say, I'm
my ancestors wild this dream? But what had came out
after that? And I would like to know what you
will say to this, doctor Carus. You're seeing a lot
of the younger ones. There's another T shirt that came out,
I'm not my ancestor, don't try me, because they were saying,

(01:25:32):
like you know, you may have done this with them,
but I'm not turning that other cheek. You won't make
it to my other cheek. But just the profound words
that I am not my ancestors, don't try me.

Speaker 6 (01:25:45):
What do you have to.

Speaker 2 (01:25:48):
Say to that?

Speaker 5 (01:25:49):
For the youth, because you've deal with the youth upcoming.
They're powerful, they're great. What would you insert?

Speaker 9 (01:25:56):
I do acknowledge their courage, because you know, that's one
thing you have to acknowledge first and foremost. But also
you know, with courage you have to do sometimes go
about it strategically because in the process of changing, you know,
you want to be bold, but you want to be

(01:26:19):
strategic at the same time.

Speaker 7 (01:26:21):
And I do.

Speaker 9 (01:26:21):
Agree with the younger generation. I'm not going to turn
the next cheek, you know. I believe that if and
it's not that we should go deal with violance or
do things that are, you know, really detrimental to us

(01:26:43):
or our community. But I believe that go about it
courageously and knowing that this is a community effort.

Speaker 7 (01:26:52):
It's not that.

Speaker 9 (01:26:54):
This is one thing that I should say. If we
are about not turning the other, we should also be
about community. We should also about lifting each other as
we go forward. Because it's one thing to say, you
know what, I'm not going to turn the next cheek,
but I'm not supporting the next person who is trying
to move the needle forward, you know, because that in

(01:27:16):
itself is not really in alignment. So if I'm not
turning the next cheek to be subjected to the labels
or the abuse, right, I'm going to support which we
should encourage the younger generation. You know, let's get in
our mind that for us to move forward, we have

(01:27:39):
to do it from a more collective standpoint, not just
over here and over here. And just because you know,
I believe that I have the courage, what about those
individuals over there? And I think that's where the problem
is within our community, because we are creative, we are resourceful,
we are talented, and we have to make sure the

(01:27:59):
next generation don't continue with the same approach. To make change,
It's going to be on us as a collective to
make a difference. And it's not about dividing ourselves like
black and white over here, but you know, to see
how we can be of value to our community, because

(01:28:22):
that's one thing that I believe is really important, you know,
us being of value. And when we demonstrate that, society
will have to look at us from a different perspective,
because I still believe they look at us on the
social conditioning of how we have been perceived. So we
have to encourage the next generation, the younger generation, to

(01:28:45):
show that we can work together going forward, and then
society will have a different perspective, you know when it
comes to us and what we want to see happen,
because numbers really matches when it comes the thing that's
going to really really help us.

Speaker 2 (01:29:04):
And Derek, I want you to add to that.

Speaker 5 (01:29:06):
And while you add to that, I want you to
expound on I love that frozen part you talked about.
It seems like every generation, every error, everything, we were
moving from a frozen perspective, not taking the best part,
but just keep reflecting and talk about the same individuals
and mimicking it, redistributing that, making samples of it if

(01:29:28):
youel like they say in the music industry, but being
frozen has affected us on all spectrums, whether it's life, entertainment, industry,
sports industry, our employment, entrepreneurs. We're mimicking this mindset from
this frozen perspective of culture, even when we have the

(01:29:49):
results in front of us that says you have to
do better. So go ahead and pick up where doctor
cross that was that and then add to that frozen
part and how do we kind of like dismel to
that that reflects every area of our life.

Speaker 7 (01:30:04):
Definitely, I like the text The Miseducation of the Negro
by Carter G.

Speaker 8 (01:30:10):
Woodson, because.

Speaker 7 (01:30:15):
He basically said, when you control a man's thinking, you
don't have to worry about his actions. You don't have
to tell him where to stand or where to go.
He will find his proper place and he will stay
in it. You don't need to send him to the
back door. He will go without being told. In fact,
if there is no back door, he will cut one

(01:30:35):
for his special benefit. His education makes it necessary. And
the reason I say that is because a lot of
times we have a very we've been miseducated in romanticizing
that frozen past, and people have distilled parts of it
without taking the whole or the journey. Because to make

(01:30:57):
the assumption that our ancestors somehow did that turned the
other cheek and were passive is to be in denial
of history. Because I would point, you know, students back
to a four volume work called Negro Slavery Bolts, four
volumes of information and history to show black people just
didn't go quietly into that good night, you know, but

(01:31:19):
resisted openly their enslavement. I would point to the reconstruction
and say where right after four million people were enslaved
and came out of that process. There were over three
hundred HBCUs opened within the within a ten year span.
There are less than one hundred today, with people who
have more education, more degrees, more money than people did

(01:31:43):
in the past. I had also point to places like
the Montgomery bus boycott because a lot of times we
just had recently some people protesting because of DEI and
say don't shop here and don't do this, and coordinating
for one day has been a difficult underton, you know.
But you look at the Montgomery bus boycott, there's twenty

(01:32:04):
seven organizations coming together to not use something that everybody
needed a bus system to get to work, and they
had already organized and came together and were meeting regularly
because they didn't plan to do it for a whole year.
The only planned to do it for a day or
two or a week, and they ended up meeting and
coming together and being able to extend that boycott for

(01:32:25):
over a year until they met with success. And so
there's something to be learned from a more accurate study
of our history that will give us a better picture
of the shoulders that were standing on rather than some
of the things that people cherry picked to disempower us

(01:32:46):
or to make us think that we have been passive
or should not be moving forward. And so for me, yes,
we have to focus on what heals us, not just
how we cope. When we're looking back into history, there's
some things we did to cope that we're not really productive,

(01:33:08):
and some things that we did to heal that were.
And we need to be able to distinguish between those
things and cut out the maladaptive things, as doctor Cross said,
the things that would limit us, and embrace the things
that would increase our reach and to move us forward.
And I think there's a lot of lessons in the
past that we can pull from that would really be

(01:33:30):
beneficial to us today and some things, quite frankly, that
we need to leave in the past and that are
not useful for us to bring forward and that we're
still exhibiting today and be able to say, Okay, let's
do that. And I love the fact that, like I said,

(01:33:52):
we're filled with progress and regress in our history, but
ultimately we want to take a look at that and
be able to turn it into something that can heal
us and move us forward.

Speaker 5 (01:34:02):
I love that before we close I'm gonna give each
of you a chance to whatever it is in you
to spill out. But before I do that, the EI
we talk about that, is there a little bit perspective
you can give people listening because that has caused this
uproar too.

Speaker 2 (01:34:21):
And there's this I don't know if it's logic or.

Speaker 5 (01:34:24):
Based in fear of explaining it's not your fight because
you know it benefited X y Z, or it is
your fight, or whatever the case is. But how do
we break free from jumping on these bandwagons without even
truly understanding what something is?

Speaker 2 (01:34:43):
And can you give us a little background of that?
What is that for us in the workplace? The EI.

Speaker 7 (01:34:51):
Diversity in equity and inclusion and now you can add justice,
belonging and all of the other the acronyms that people
will place on It is all a rebrand of The
essential question is how to be inclusive in this society.
The reality is that this society was designed for white males,

(01:35:13):
rich white males, and everybody else had to be amended
in and we're still struggling with how to manage how
to amend people into this society. And we're reaching another
crossroads where we're debating whether or not who should be

(01:35:34):
included in this American project, whether we should be what
we aspire to be, we should live up to the
aspirations of this country, or we should go to the
lowest common denominator and deal with the contradictions or not
deal with the contradictions that were inherent at the very
beginning of this country. And we're still rebranding and wrestling

(01:35:54):
with the same conversation which is now encapsulated in DEI.
But the Negro question was talked about as soon as
we came out of enslavement, and it has been bandied
about ever since. And we're trying to find ways to
deal with a system that wasn't designed with us in mind.
And if we're talking about breaking free, if we're talking

(01:36:17):
about not being affected by the negativity or the place
where people want to take us, then that forces us
to say take the responsibility of breaking away and say,
with this freedom, we need to choose to connect with

(01:36:39):
each other in ways that we have never we haven't
done in quite some time, and find strength in our
connections with one another. What is missing is that we
were happy to be the intellectual superior of people and
say we got the best argument, but not the best practice.
You know, our educational system has been focused on who

(01:37:01):
knows most, but not who can do and who can make.
We've we've you know, sort of divorced knowing from doing
and making, so we don't have any impulse to go
out and to create. What we talk about that entrepreneurial
spirit that you you know addressed that says take ownership
and take the risk and be committed and move forward.

(01:37:26):
It impels us to say, Okay, not only do I
have to know what to do, but I have to
go out there and try, and then I have to
make mistakes and I have to pick myself back up
and try again until I get it right. That's a
that's a different mentality to have than what we would
traditionally get in our educational system. And we need to

(01:37:46):
look back at that and say, hey, let's not get
caught up in the rebranding of the of this argument
and look at the root of it. The root of
it is still, are we living up to our aspirations
as a nation? And if not, I mean, if that's
the thing we need to do, then we need to

(01:38:06):
come together and find ways to connect and to heal
and if we're not doing that and we're just talking
about having great arguments and being right and sitting back
and wat letting uh negativity went out, then we're part
of the problem as well.

Speaker 5 (01:38:25):
All right, doctor Cross, I want you to wherever either
on that or what you want to spill out. What
are your empowering educational words to leave with the listeners
the viewers?

Speaker 2 (01:38:39):
What are those? And then where can you be connected
to Okay, I.

Speaker 6 (01:38:45):
Didn't think doctor Westbrook, did you tell them or they
can connect with you?

Speaker 2 (01:38:48):
No, he's gonna he's gonna get so. Yeah, he was
answering the last question.

Speaker 5 (01:38:52):
But then you're gonna now start off the last work
and then there we're going to do the last work
in the same thing.

Speaker 6 (01:38:58):
Okay, okay, okay, Well, you know I will acknowledge what
doctor Westbrook stated with THEI. You know, when we hear
all the statistics, you know we didn't benefit greatly from THEI.
But for me, it's not a topic that I do

(01:39:18):
pay attention to our we even.

Speaker 9 (01:39:21):
Look into to be honest with you, because I believe
for us as black people, you know, if we want progress,
we have to work towards it. We should not sit
back and wait for anyone to do for us what
we can do for ourselves. And once we take that responsibility,

(01:39:43):
our voice will be taken more seriously. I'm not waiting
on you to give me this and once we can
move from that. Yes, we need to work together, We
need to be in the same space. We need to
make our contribution because I believe for this country to progress. Sorry,
and that may be one of the issue with America today.

(01:40:04):
Some people did not get the opportunity to share their
greatness with the world. And people are the most valuable
asset in a country. And if some people are not
able to share their greatness, their potential, their ability, the
country itself will starve from its greatness. So yes, everyone

(01:40:28):
needs to be able to have the opportunity to be
their best self, which will in turn contribute greatly to
the country. But we know that, you know, America didn't
really design with us in mind to be at the forefront.
But I believe as we go forward, as doctor Westbrook
stated that, you know, no, I think this time is

(01:40:52):
give us, giving us an opportunity to really work together.
We must take advantage of this time in history to
really come together to see how we can work as
a collective to create something better for the next generation.
They should not have to wait for anyone to give

(01:41:14):
them a head, a handout, or you know, a leg up.
We are going to create that for the next generation.
And we don't have a big window to really create
for the next generation. So we have to get at
it right now, start working together like our life depends
on it, so the next generation will not have to,

(01:41:36):
you know, go through some of the same challenges and
have to wait and keep waiting. And by waiting, sometimes
you may not you may wait out your time. You
may die and still don't get what you think you
deserve if we don't create it. And but that is
not an individual job. It's a collective job. And I
think now we should really you know, work together. So

(01:42:01):
that's you know, my take on what we should do
as we go forward. But the individuals here and who
are listening can connect with me on LinkedIn, also on
Facebook and Instagram, and they can find me on YouTube
as well on their The black Man Impact every other platform.

(01:42:24):
Is my name, doctor Richard.

Speaker 2 (01:42:26):
Across out the words there and then where they can
connect with you.

Speaker 7 (01:42:32):
Yes, I'm definitely a student of history and if we
want to look at how to come together. One of
the things I used to stress in my class is
the Black Women's club movement. Aside from the U.

Speaker 6 (01:42:45):
N I.

Speaker 7 (01:42:45):
A And Marcus Garvey in the nineteen twenties, if you
honestly sustained grassroots organizing and how to do it well
and with excellence, you look me look no further than
the history and legacy of black women in the twentieth century,
and see how what just happened in these past two elections.

(01:43:06):
Even though Kamala Harris lost, the infrastructure that was behind
her was largely organized by Black women who did a
tremendous job in pulling together something in a historically short
period of time to be able to try and move
us in the right direction. So if we look at

(01:43:28):
the leadership that is out there, I think we have
to learn more than any time else to compliment one another,
to be able to recognize and see each other for
who we are as Black men and Black women, and
in our various expressions of ourselves in our community. We
need to really learn to draw upon the strengths of

(01:43:49):
each other and see the value, worth and appreciation of
one another. There is strength to be seen on either side.
I am a man who is married to a beautiful wife,
who is very strong woman who is my compliment, who
takes care of me as I take care of her,
and we've learned over time to share that dance of

(01:44:11):
taking care of each other when we need it most,
and to see that we need to bridge that understanding
more so within our community, so that we're not being
divided and pitted against one another and involved in a
lot of this craziness today that really doesn't reproduce and

(01:44:34):
refine the best of who we are. I can be
reached via Gmail most of the time Westbrook dot Derek
at Gmail. I am on LinkedIn and on Facebook as well.
I'm always open to having a good discussion and to
talking about how we can solve the problems and heal
as we move forward. You mentioned at the beginning, I'm

(01:44:58):
someone who believes in relying on our cultural strengths and
seeing that we are interconnected and interdependent people who need
each other and who need to learn how to express
love and appreciate one another to the fullest degree and
support each other and mirror that in the way we
live our lives, not just in our rhetoric that we

(01:45:21):
bring to the table. So if we can live that
with each other and move forward, we're gonna need it
more than ever. Unfortunately, the storm is already upon us.
But we need to use whatever opportunities we have in
front of us to hold to each other and build
something together because we are the solutions that we're looking for.

Speaker 2 (01:45:45):
I agree with that. I agree.

Speaker 5 (01:45:46):
So the objective, like I told you all, there is something,
and it's more than something. There's a lot of things
for you to walk away with and just meditate on it,
some things I'm pretty sure you've heard before. But as
they both had said, it's time for us to not
just talk about it, not just rhetoric, but actually it's action.
The one thing I really really loved and I never

(01:46:10):
thought about it that way. For our youth, for our
young ones out there who say I'm not my ancestors,
I'm not going to turn the cheek. You are your ancestors,
and no you don't have to turn the other cheek.
But to the point that was made, do not put
your ancestors in this box with this narrative that was

(01:46:32):
talked to you about who they are.

Speaker 2 (01:46:35):
It's more of a story. Get that information that Derek shared.

Speaker 5 (01:46:41):
Rewind the video if you need read about it, because
there was power and the things that they did, there
was power. A lot of times when you've seen people
set on fire or hanging or doing this, it's because
they didn't run. It's because they stood for something. They
walked in the face of terror. They knew what was

(01:47:03):
going to meet them on the other side, but they
also knew what was going to meet us on this side.
So please don't misconstrue who what your ancestors were learned
the full picture. There was no other cheeks being turned.
And it's about mindset shift everything that they shared. Let's

(01:47:25):
shift our mind from fear based logic to intuition. That
means take our time, analyze what we're about to say,
what conversations we're about to participate in. Don't do it
from an emotional standpoint. If you're emotional, you're angry, all
these other things. Step back and then join if you

(01:47:48):
need to. Once you regroup. But we are our solution,
as doctor Rouss said, we are we are our solution.
We have been amended someone that learned law. One thing
I learned in first year law school, learn the Constitution.
We were written into these things these laws that was

(01:48:10):
automatically given to other people. Don't focus on the rebrand,
as Derek said, focus on the route, and it's time
for us to rip them up and plant we want
planet in there. That's a wrap for today's episode of
the Seek Elevation Experience.

Speaker 2 (01:48:29):
Thank you so much for tuning in.

Speaker 5 (01:48:31):
I appreciate you engaging that adds value to this powerful
conversation and other conversations. I'm more so gonna appreciate if
you now take this and go into action with it.
Connect with them too, so you can continue surround yourself
around people that's going to continue to feed your mind
and that you can also go back and forth with
to elevate. Remember, the more you know, the more you grow,

(01:48:54):
the more you learn, the more you can earn. But
more importantly, when you share, you show care. So share
this episode. I'm gonna slice it up and I'm gonna
share its going out. Don't keep this knowledge to yourself,
spread the wisdom tag friends. Until next time, keep striving,
keep growing, and most importantly, keep seeking ellavation. See you

(01:49:16):
next time. Peace and progress