Self-Care Haven

Self-Care Haven

Reflections and meditations to empower survivors of abuse and trauma. Hosted by bestselling author Shahida Arabi, founder of the blog Self-Care Haven.

Episodes

Why Couples Counseling Doesn't Work For Abusive Relationships With Narcissists

April 19, 2020 • 17 mins
5 Reasons Why Couples Counseling Doesn't Work For Abusive Relationships With Narcissists: https://blogs.psychcentral.com/recovering-narcissist/2019/09/why-couples-therapy-doesnt-work-for-people-in-abusive-relationships-with-narcissists/
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5 Techniques Pick-Up Artists and Narcissists Sociopaths Have In Common

November 15, 2019 • 38 mins
There are five techniques pick-up artists and narcissists have in common. Can you guess what they are? Find out in this latest episode of Self-Care Haven for Survivors. Read the full article on pick-up artistry and narcissism here: https://blogs.psychcentral.com/recovering-narcissist/2018/12/5-pick-up-artist-techniques-narcissists-sociopaths-and-psychopaths-players-use-to-unsettle-you/
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Stonewalling and The Narcissists Silent Treatment How They Are Different From No Contact

November 15, 2019 • 9 mins
Why do narcissists use stonewalling and the silent treatment? And how does it differ from when victims go No Contact with their abusers? Find out in this latest episode of Self-Care for Survivors. Read the article on stonewalling here: https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2018/04/stonewalling-and-the-silent-treatment-when-the-narcissists-silence-is-deafening/
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The Manipulative Narcissist's Gaslighting Playbook: Translations of What They Say and What They REALLY Mean

March 28, 2019 • 39 mins
I discuss the 12 common phrases narcissists use to manipulate you, as well as the 7 phrases they use to gaslight you. Visit my website www.shahidaarabi.com for more information about my work. Derived from my articles 12 Things Narcissists Say and What They REALLY Mean on Thought Catalog and 7 Gaslighting Phrases Malignant Narcissists Use - https://blogs.psychcentral.com/recovering-narcissist/2019/03/7-gaslighting-phrases-malignant-...
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How Narcissists And Sociopaths Test Our Boundaries Early On (And Why We Ignore the Red Flags)

November 24, 2018 • 35 mins
How do narcissistic predators test the boundaries of their victims? Why do victims tend to ignore red flags early on? And what does childhood abuse have to do with this? In this episode, I explore why we tend to ignore our inner guidance and how we can start to tap into the intuition that could save our lives.

Pre-order my new book, Healing the Children of Narcissists, here: www.tinyurl.com/childrenofnarcissists

Read my blog on Psych...
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Is The Narcissist Happy With The New Victim?

September 19, 2018 • 12 mins
Is the narcissist really happy with the new victim? I explore the reasons why we ask this question and why the answer is likely no.

5 behaviours that will expose a narcissist the first time you meet them: https://www.mamamia.com.au/what-is-narcissism/

12 Of The Most Common Lies Sociopaths And Narcissists Tell, Translated Into Truth:
https://blogs.psychcentral.com/recovering-narcissist/2018/09/12-of-the-most-common-lies-sociopaths-and-...
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The INFJ: What It's Like To Be The Rarest Personality Type

March 13, 2018 • 26 mins
Be sure to read more about the INFJ in my articles here: 

Why INFJ Empaths Fall Prey To Narcissists: https://introvertdear.com/news/3-reasons-infj-empaths-fall-prey-to-narcissists/  

What It's Like Being An INFJ, In Other Words, A Living Paradox: https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2017/12/whats-its-like-to-be-an-infj-in-other-words-a-living-paradox/

6 Things You Need To Know If You're Dating An INFJ: https://thoughtcatalog.com/s...
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Empaths 101: What It's Like, How They're 'Made' And How To Protect Ourselves

March 12, 2018 • 13 mins
Check out my articles on empaths and children of narcissists:

7 Things People Don't Realize You're Doing Because You're The Child Of A Narcissistic Parent: https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2018/03/7-things-people-dont-realize-youre-doing-because-youre-the-child-of-a-narcissistic-parent/

The Dark Side Of Being An Empath: https://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2018/01/the-dark-side-of-being-an-empath-5-powerful-ways-the-highl...
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The Female Narcissist Is Just As Dangerous As Her Male Counterpart

February 17, 2018 • 35 mins
Female malignant narcissists are especially dangerous because they can fly under the radar more easily.

The 4 traits discussed: Intro (0:00-05:50) 

1. A sadistic sense of pleasure at someone else’s pain (05:50 - 09:08) and relational aggression towards other females (10:01 - 17:17) 2. An insatiable sense of competitiveness, due to pathological envy and the need to be the center of attention. (09:08 - 17:17) 3. An obsession with her a...
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30 Kickass Affirmations for Staying No Contact With an Abusive Narcissist

May 13, 2017 • 49 mins
See the article version of this article here: http://thoughtcatalog.com/shahida-arabi/2017/05/30-kickass-affirmations-for-going-no-contact-with-an-abusive-narcissist/
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Power Affirmations for Emotional Abuse and Bullying Survivors

May 9, 2017 • 8 mins
I've created these powerful affirmations / manifesto to help keep you grounded during times of distress. Meant to inspire, encourage and empower you when you feel invalidated, bullied or otherwise pulled down by negativity.
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Healing from Narcissistic Abuse: Tips and Tools

February 11, 2016 • 6 mins
To learn more about the healing modalities available and the universal 11 Steps abuse survivors must take on the road to recovery, pre-order Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself: http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Narcissists-Nightmare-Narcissist-Supplying-ebook/dp/B01B01O3PA/
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How Abuse Survivors Can Stage Their Own Victories from Abuse

February 11, 2016 • 6 mins
For more information on how to stage your own recovery from abuse, pre-order my new book, Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself, here: http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Narcissists-Nightmare-Narcissist-Supplying-ebook/dp/B01B01O3PA/
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What is the Difference Between an Addict and a Narcissist?

February 11, 2016 • 3 mins
In this episode, I explore the distinction between an addict and a narcissistic abuser who also abuses alcohol and/or drugs. To learn more about narcissism and substance use, pre-order my new book, Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself, here: http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Narcissists-Nightmare-Narcissist-Supplying-ebook/dp/B01B01O3PA/
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Emotional Abuse 101: Why do victims stay so long in abusive relationships?

February 2, 2016 • 7 mins
An audio excerpt from my new book, Becoming the Narcissist's Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself, explains the reasons why abuse victims stay in abusive relationships, including the biochemical and trauma bonding that takes place between abusers and their victims. 
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Emotional Abuse 101: Why do abusers contact their former victims?

February 1, 2016 • 5 mins
I discuss "hoovering," a technique abusers such as narcissistic abusers use to regain control after the ending of an abusive relationship. For more tips on healing from abuse, be sure to visit selfcarehaven.wordpress.com.
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