Sex Is Medicine Is Back!

It's back! 
Sex Is Medicine PODCAST -  your number one resource for Holistic Sex Education- is back!

Sex Is Medicine is serving up sex-ed info rooted in 27 years of combined expertise! Alaina Salks and Devi Ward Erickson share the most cutting-edge and accurate information to answer your questions about holistic sexual wellness, helping you integrate body, mind, spirit, and sex.
Brand-new episodes of Sex Is Medicine drop every Thursday morning, so be sure to like and subscribe on all your favorite listening platforms so you don't miss a single dose of Sex Is Medicine.

This week's dose of Sex Is Medicine is served with tea…
Alaina and Devi spill ALL the tea about WTF is happening with IATE, why the Authentic Tantra Certification Program is ending after a DECADE on the market (RIP ATCP!), + WTF catalyzed the radical changes behind the scenes of IATE.

We invite you to grab a cup of something delicious, get cozy, and tune in to turn on your heart, mind, spirit, and sex!

In this episode, Devi and Alaina share

1. Devi's experience of evacuating her home hours before it was consumed by an out-of-control wildfire
2. The difference between "bad" karma and "intense" karma
3. The transformative power of FIRE element
4. The reality of spiritual alignment and spiritual integrity
5. Why authentic Tantra is NOT for everyone
6. Clarifying the difference between Tantra and Holistic Sexology
7. Why Holistic Sexology opens so many more doors of possibility

Sex Is Medicine is an award-winning podcast that launched in 2013 as "Better Love and Sex". In 2015, BLS rebranded as "Sex Is Medicine" and, in 2021, won the 2021 AASECT award for Best Sexuality-Based Podcast.

We are grateful to be back with all of you! 

Make sure you like and subscribe on all of your favorite listening platforms so you don't miss your weekly dose of Sex Is Medicine REBOOT.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, I'm Davy word Ericson and I'm Elena Salks and you.

Speaker 2 (00:05):
Are listening to sex is Medicine, your number one resource
for holistic sex education. Elena and I are bringing you
over twenty seven years of combined expertise in the field
of holistic sexual wellness to help you integrate your body, mind, spirit,
and sex.

Speaker 1 (00:23):
New episodes drop every Thursday morning, so make sure to
like and subscribe on all your favorite listening platforms, and
make sure you follow Holistic Sexology Institute on Instagram, TikTok,
and YouTube for your daily dose on sex is Medicine.
Now let's get started.

Speaker 2 (00:42):
Hello and welcome. I am Davy word Ericson.

Speaker 1 (00:45):
And I am Elena Salks, and you.

Speaker 2 (00:48):
Are listening to sex is Medicine Reboot, your number one
resource for holistic sex education. And why are we your
number one resource for holistic sex educate Asia? Well, I'm
about to tell you we are your literally, I'm not joking, y'all,
number one resource for holistic sex education because Elena and

(01:08):
I together have over twenty seven years of combined expertise
in the field of holistic sexual healing and authentic lineage
based NTRA and Elena and I together co founded the
only still the only, first and only government accredited school

(01:29):
for holistic sexual healing contric sexual healing in the world.
We did that together, and we have worked side by
side for over a decade training and certifying over one
hundred and fifty people in authentic lineage based TNTRA, which
may not sound like a lot, but when you're talking
about authentic TNTRA, that's a whole shit ton of fucking karma.

(01:50):
You gotta deal with what the one hundred practitioners under
your wing. And together we have supported thousands of people
around the globe in healing and integrating body, mind, spirit
and sex using holistic healing and authentic lineage based contract methods.
So together were like we are the dream team. And Elena,

(02:12):
the fact that we have we have worked together for
over a decade, that is amazing. That's like wonder twin
powers Activate.

Speaker 1 (02:22):
That's been a beautiful ride.

Speaker 2 (02:24):
Yeah, a lot of ups and downs. So I really
feel like, you know, there was that what was that movie?
There was a movie with Robin Williams. Maybe it was
Field of Dreams and it was like Cuba good and
Gooding Junior, And maybe it was Robin Williams or something else.
But there was like this dialogue and they said there
is no one one of them said, like one of
the characters said, there's no one I would rather walk
through hell with than you. I'd be like, there's no

(02:48):
one I would rather walk through heaven and hell with them.
And we have certainly done that together as a team.
And so I am I am so delighted and I
feel so reported in having your shared expertise in this
reboot of Sex's Medicine.

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Yeah, thank you for having me for it. I feel
really honored to be here with you.

Speaker 2 (03:11):
Yeah, yeah, okay, audience. So, so with this episode, we
wanna we wanna share with you, like what the fuck
is up right, because what the fuck is up with
our institute, what the fuck is up with Sex is Medicine,
Because we've been through a lot of a lot of changes,
and I mean, from the outside, it may look like
what is happening, and so I want to share, like

(03:34):
transparently and authentically what has been going on for us
behind the scenes personally, because what has occurred for us
personally has deeply influenced how we show up in the
world professionally, and so we want to give you some
insight about that. And I personally really have needs for clarity.
I really have needs for clarity, and I really have

(03:55):
needs to be seen and heard and understood in a
way that is you know, that is congruent with my experience.
So so we wanted to share with you some of
the inner workings of what is happening, wtf is actually
going on and why? Yeah? Cool, all right, So so

(04:17):
we're here, We're back Sex's Medicine. And as you may
have seen, we warmed up our podcasting muscles, uh with
our Tentra talks that we launched in I believe it
was May, just this last May June. We had Lama
Tashi joining us for that and that was that was
that was I'm gonna call it our warm up. That

(04:38):
is actually what what what birthed our choice to relaunch
Sex's Medicine. And so, for those of you that don't know,
Sex's Medicine was born in twoenty thirteen, so thirteen years
ago was our first episode, my first episode of Sex's

(04:58):
Medicine back on Contact Talk radio network. I recently learned
I heard from some students that they have been listening
to Sex's Medicine for a decade, y'all. So that is amazing.
That is some longevity. And when when I first launched
Sexist Medicine, I actually it was called Better Love and Sex,
Better Love and Sex. And then in twenty fifteen, we
rebranded this Sexist Medicine to refine the focus, because that's

(05:21):
what we're about, like truly, truly, truly sexual pleasure, mindful, connected,
deep sexual pleasure is a pathway of healing and transformation.
And I believe that and know that in every cell
of my being. And so that is the medicine that
we want to share with you. That is the wisdom,
the knowledge and the power that we want to share

(05:42):
with you. And so Sex's Medicine, the brand was emerged
onto the scene in twenty fifteen, and then we went
until twenty twenty one, like NonStop, back to back, and
in twenty twenty one, I just want to toot our
own horn. We actually I actually received an ACE Award
for Best Podcast Series in twenty twenty one. So Sex's

(06:05):
Medicine is a legitimately, I can legitimately say that it
is an award winning podcast, y'all. We can legitimately say that.
And we needed to take a break for a while
and regroup and reconnect. And I just want to say
that I am so thrilled, absolutely thrilled and delighted to
be back online, run in my big mouth with for

(06:27):
all of you, bustin myths, transforming our the landscape of sexuality.
And one of the things that Lena and I are
really excited about is being able to really to bring
you again expert information because in the time that we
have been in the field, in our over twenty seven
years of combined expertise, we have born witness to the

(06:52):
explosion of the sexology industry, and that is amazing. The
more voices there are out here educating about human sexual
functioning and how how our sexual pleasure and our sexual
intelligence can be a pathway of evolution and healing and

(07:13):
growth and harmony is so so important. So celebrating the
emergence round of applause, celebrating the emergence of so many
new and profound and expert voices in the field. And
along with the expert voices, there's some shit, y'all, like,
like really like when you throw capitalism into the mix,

(07:35):
you're gonna get, you know, you're gonna get opportunistic stuff
and that's just the way the world works. And so
part of what we want to do with sexist medicine
is we want to bust up some myths. We want
to address some of the ish we see online and
we want to we want to counteract that and with
loving kindness and compassion. We want to be nice about it.

(07:57):
But we don't want you walking around believing that you're
vagina should be numb and you shouldn't feel pleasure doing penetration,
or that anal sex is gross like we don't. We
don't want you to believe in be believing those myths
or you have to be in your full feminine to
attract the power of man like. We want to bust
that shit up for you. Okay, And again, we aren't newbies.

(08:19):
We aren't like the girl on Instagram that's got a
cute butt so she's got a million followers. That's not us.
We have been here for over twenty seven years together
and we have founded a school that is the still
the only government accredited school in the world teaching teaching
the methods that we teach. So so we want to

(08:41):
bring dignity. We want to bring dignity and integrity to
the conversation of holistic sexual healing. Anything you want to
add to that, my Campadre.

Speaker 1 (08:54):
Yes, thank you for all of that. That was beautiful,
and I just want to reiterate, Yeah, I'm really excited
to bust those myths. And I feel like a huge
part of why we ended up deciding to do this
together is because one of our favorite things is to
hang out and rail against all of the misinformation that
is out there.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
And so, you know, we've.

Speaker 1 (09:16):
Been really busy running a huge certification program and doing
this business, and it's wonderful to have an opportunity to
be here together and get to show you all what
happens in the back end for us. You know, when
we get to hang out and talk and share information
that we have.

Speaker 2 (09:37):
Well, if we're really going to share with them that
we need to have, like Margarita and a joint and
then you all here are some shit. So that probably
is not suitable for YouTube at all. And so so
before we dive into today's episode, that might be a
good episode, but today, before we dive into today's episode,

(09:57):
I want to remind you all to like and subscribe
on whatever platform you're listening to. Sex's Medicine broadcasts on YouTube,
and we're trying to boost that YouTube channel up and
we have beautiful background. So if you if you are
not checking us out on YouTube, I'm gonna highly recommend
that you do. Today we are in my bedroom, so
you get to see where the erics and magic happens.

(10:21):
Check bow wow right, So maybe you're only gonna see
that on YouTube, so go to our YouTube channel. You
can find us at the Holistic Sexology Institute. Okay, at
Holistic Sexology Institute. I know all the changes are are
sometimes hard to keep up with, but that's where you're
gonna find us. That's gonna be our at Holistic Sexology
Institute on YouTube. Uh, and make sure you click like

(10:43):
and subscribe. We're trying to build our YouTube channel. We've
been shadow band, y'all like really like, so the more
you can like, subscribe and share, the better. So that's
gonna break up that shadow band for us. And then
if you're listening on Spotify iTunes, make sure you subscribe
and give us a rating, you know, and also of
us comments, let us know, like is my mic to
you know? Is it too? Is my did you not

(11:04):
like my mic? Is it to echoe? Do we need
you know is the background yanky leg do you want
my makeup to look different? Like? Maybe not all that
critical feedback, but you know, let us know what you think.
And if you have questions, we want your questions. Trust
me when I tell you we love answering your questions.
We truly do like that. There's nothing else that we
like doing more, So send us your questions. We're on Instagram.

(11:28):
We're still by the time this episode drops. We might
be at Holistic Sexology Institute on Instagram, but we got
Shadow Band on Instagram, so they're being kind of salty
about change in our name. But you can find us
at the are The title of our page change from
Institute of Authentic TNTRA Education, which we will talk about
why that change happened to Institute of Holistic Sexology and

(11:52):
are at may still be at Authentic TNTRA, but we're
trying to get it changed to at Holistic Sexology Institute.
So I hope you followed all that. Just look at
Holistic Sexology Institute and you're gonna find my gorgeous face
and Elena's gorgeous face. Why that's there, and that is
where you will be able to like and subscribe and

(12:13):
continue getting your episodes of Sex's Medicine. Yeah, okay, so
let's dig in. Let's what's what what, what's been happening
and and why WTF WTF is going on with the
Institute and and Davy and Sex's Medicine and Tundra and

(12:33):
all of that. So I'm gonna back up two years
and uh start start from the beginning of this. I'm
gonna call this transformational journey. So some of y'all know
and some of y'all don't know that in August twenty
twenty three, it was August eighteenth of twenty twenty three,
my entire home burned on down to the ground in

(12:56):
and out of control wildfire in West Colonna, British Columbia.
So I am a survivor of climate change catastrophe. Yes,
that that is why that out of control wildfire burnt down,
you know, the whole the town essentially, And and that
was that was a shock. That was a profound, profound,

(13:17):
profound shock as you can imagine. So yeah, so the
the I'll give you a little bit of the story
of that because it was pretty pretty amazing. Uh So,
on August seventeenth, I was the timing of all this
is amazing. So we had actually put our house, our
house on the market for sale a week a week

(13:39):
before it burned down, y'all. We were actually trying to
sell our house, fully furnished. We wanted essentially a walk
away price. We were offering it a walk away price
because we didn't want to deal with all the furniture
and all that. We just wanted like, sell the whole thing,
take our precious you know, heirlooms, family heirlooms and record
collection and books, and walk walk away. And so we

(14:01):
had put it on the market literally seven days before
it burned down. And then we were in the process
We're about to open registration for our Entra Healing for
Couples program. We were going to open registration like the
following week. And so I was actually sitting down on
that Thursday morning, August seventeenth, to work on the Tauntre

(14:23):
Healing for Couples program. And I remember, so my office
was my office where I was working was up on
the second floor, and it overlooked the lake, and it
overlooked the woods because we lived in a wooded area
and you know, the forest and the trees and all
that and I was at my computer and Chris came up,
and Douctor Erkson came up, and he was like, you know,
I just want to let you know that there is

(14:45):
a there's a fire evacuation alert. Right, there's an evacuation alert,
so it's not an evacuation order. It was an alert.
But we'd been under evacuation alert before. We lived in
the Okanagan Valley. There's you know, fires because there's drought,
because there's climate change. So we had been under alerts before.
So I didn't really think too much of it, and

(15:08):
so I just kept working on the computer, right And
then so I'm working there, and this was about like
nine or ten in the morning, and then like around
eleven or twelve, I saw like a family of coyotes
go through the yard and I was like, oh cool.
I didn't sink iontes in a while, like maybe they
were foxes. I was like, oh what apps. And then

(15:29):
they were like a whole troop of deer came through,
like from you know, going across the screen, and I
was like, oh, okay, there's a lot of deer. That's okay, cool.
And then I saw a mama bear and her two
cubs hustling hauling booty across our yard. And that was

(15:50):
like around one in the afternoon, and I was like,
we gotta go, We better go. And so so we
actually began our evacuation process before the evacuation alert became
an order. So so we looked online and you know,

(16:10):
they're like, oh, pack an overnight suitcase, like you're gonna
be gone for two or three days, you know, pack
You're like, you know, whatever you think you might need,
bloody blah blah. But they didn't see it. They didn't
act like it was a big deal. But they were like,
tape your windows, you know, and like do all this stuff.
And because we had just put the house on the market,
we we were we really didn't want any damage to
happen to the house. So we spent hours hours taping windows,

(16:37):
pulling furniture back from the windows, like I don't know,
securing things. I can't remember all the stuff we didn't.
All just remembers like Chris taping windows for hours, like
all the windows we had all these big top floor
to ceiling windows. He taped all the windows all around
the house center, et cetera. So we were preparing the
house for to prevent fire damage as much as we could.

(16:59):
We were seriously not expecting our house to burn down,
because who does, right, and the evacuation you know, alerts
don't say act as if your house is about to
fucking burn down, and pack all the shit you actually
fucking want. They don't say that because I don't want
to scare you, but they should. They should be saying, like,
pack pack all of your treasures because you will never

(17:19):
see them again. So so Christmas taping windows and I
was like, I'm a pack of suit like a big
ass suitcase. So I like went around the house and
I remember Chris and Laurie were laughing at me because
I like cleared the shrine. I'm just like scooping shit up,
like running through the house, grabbing stuff off the walls,

(17:39):
and like I would look at something I'm like and
I would just like, in a split second, I'd be like,
do I love that? Yes or no? Can I live
without it? Yes or no? And that is what determined
what I actually put in that suitcase, just by determining
do I love it yes or no? Can I live
without it? Yes or no? And if it was a no,
I grabbed it like I grabbed like I had this

(18:00):
whole bulletin board of pictures of my now deceased brother
that that I brought with me, because when I looked
at it, it was like do I love it? Yes? Can
I live without it? No? So I fucking put it
in the truck. So so again, we were doing this
before the alert had turned into an order. So I
think at this time it was like three o'clock in
the afternoon, and again we're like, you know, I'm running

(18:21):
around the house. Chris and Wayer are laughing at me,
and I'm just like, look, I'm.

Speaker 3 (18:25):
Like, I am.

Speaker 2 (18:26):
I am like with this, disaster Davy. You can call
me disaster Davy. I will. I'm like, if a disaster
can happen, what is the worst thing that could possibly
happen that will probably have hits. I'm just kidding, just
in case, Just in case, disaster Davy. So when the
climbate apocalypse hits, y'all, you know you can shock up

(18:46):
with disaster Davy because I am preparing. I am preparing.
I have told my friends, when you need to get
the fuck out of the United States, come to me
because we'll have a casita for you. Disaster Davy is
planning for it. So anyway, so we actually like we
hopped in the car and we packed up the dog

(19:08):
and all the things, and we were driving and like,
I have video of the smoke that was billowing over,
Like maybe I'll put that, like, you know, somewhere where
y'all can see it. Let me know in the comments
if you want, if you want us to see it,
or if you want if you want me to show
you these videos of the smoke and the like. It
was like talk about apocalyptic and and oh my god, Elena,

(19:32):
the experience in that moment of like seeing the clouds,
the plumes of smoke come over the hill and the
sky was orange and like you could see the like
the flames over the bridge, and like the sensation in
my body of fight or flight. That was the most
visceral experience of flight I have ever experienced. And your mind,

(19:58):
like your forebrain shuts down and it's pure survival. It's
just like get what I need and get the fuck out.
Like it felt like a drum beat in my soul.
It was like go, go, go go. I mean it
was it was horrifying. It was terrifying. So we're driving

(20:18):
with like clouds of smoke billowing behind us, not knowing
that we would literally never see our home again. And
we drove down to merit and as Wild because we
had we had some friends that were across the lake
and Cologne. They're like, Oh, do you want to come
stay with us. I'm like, hell, fuck no, because that
fire is about to jump the lake. Like I just

(20:39):
knew it. I was like, I don't want to be
within two hours of this fire. I was like, I
want to be anywhere near this fire. And lo and
behold that night it jumped the lake. And then some
of our friends who had invited us to stay with them,
they were evacuated too. That was that fire was It

(21:00):
jumped the lake and like not the lake wasn't It
was huge. It jumped the lake and started fires on
the other side of the lake and the people had
to be evacuated on the other side of the lake.
Like ooh, it had an intelligence, like it truly did.
That's what the firefighters were saying, and the indigenous firefighters

(21:21):
said that. He said, this fire is sentient. The First
Nations fire chief said, this fire is sentient. It has intelligence,
It has a direction, it knows where it wants to
go and nothing's gonna stop it. And he was saying
that on TV at like seven o'clock on Thursday night,
the night we were evacuated, and I was like, the

(21:43):
fire was right behind their house. I was like, there
is no way our house is going to survive the night.
There is absolutely no way. So we spent that night
in a hotel, coming to terms with the fact that
we would probably most likely not have a home to
return to. And we woke up the next morning like
I don't I mean, I don't know that we slept.

(22:05):
I would say that we were an altered in an
altered state all night, and I was like, I could
see those fire element fire elementals in my in my
minds well I and I saw in my awareness the
fire element Dikini come up over that hill and start
chopping houses. Like I saw her with a skull cup
in her left hand and a hook knife in her

(22:27):
right hand, and she was like, I'm taking that house,
and I'm taking in that house, and I'm taking that
house and I'm taking that house, and she was just
scooping them up. And the next morning we woke up
and I knew in my bones that our house was gone,
and by noon. The noon that day, it was gone,

(22:48):
that the entire house had been incinerated, had gone up
in flames, and uh and the wild thing is the way.
The reason that we knew this is be because the
helicopter pilots that were dropping water on the houses shared
a video of them dropping water on our house. That

(23:12):
is how we knew, because everybody else in the neighborhood
didn't know for weeks if their house was gone. Like
people like it was a waiting game like in Canada.
It's not like the United States and the LA Fire,
when people can just go walk around in the middle
of a fire like Canada is like, no, bitch, you
are evacuated and you're not getting back in and we
are not telling you shit until the fire is out

(23:36):
and it is safe to go back in. So there
are people that waited like literally two weeks to find
out if they had a home to go back to
whe or not. We knew the day it burned because
the helicopter dudes dropping water on the fires posted a
video on Instagram of them dropping buckets of water on
our burning house. And so we reached out to the

(23:56):
helicopter guy and he told us, your house is gone,
and he cried. He cried and said I tried. I'm
so sorry because he didn't know. By that time, we
were like, all right, and we were going to insurance.
Are we insured? So you know about word shirts, so
so he was crying for us, and by that time

(24:17):
we had you know, of course it's traumatic, it's like
the day the house burns down, but we had like
in our minds we had come to terms with the
fact that this was what was happening, or most likely
what was going to happen, and when we got confirmation
from him, we were like, Okay, this is this is
this is what's happening. So sorry going didn't.

Speaker 1 (24:36):
He Also, something I remember from the story when you
were telling it to me before was this emphasis on
him saying like I tried everything that I could do,
and this fire just wouldn't not be vanquished. And sort
of like with that image of you seeing the tikini
coming in, how that seemed to coincide that like this, yeah,

(24:58):
this like a sentience around the house party.

Speaker 2 (25:03):
Exactly exactly, and that thank you for bringing that up,
because that is one of the things that he said.
He said he's never seen a fire like that ever,
and he's been fighting fires for over a decade, and
he said that they did everything they could to put
that fire out and it would not go at And
he said, He's like, it's like it had a mind
of its own. That that was literally like the common

(25:26):
thread of the of that fire. And I'm sure it's
not the only one. Like as as climate apocalypse continues,
like this is the thing. The elements are sentient, Like
this has been the foundation of my teachings for almost
twenty years and the foundation of your teachings for over
a decade. The elements are sentient beings. They have intelligence,

(25:49):
they have intent, they have motivation, they are they are
beings that we can interact with, and that is part
of the reclamation of our of our true human nature,
at least for me, is reclaiming our abilities to be
in right relationship with the elemental energies in our environment.

(26:11):
And you know, we can get into you know whatever
on another episode, fossil fuels and all that, you know,
what's fueling and climate change. But but to me, this
is symptomatic. It's a demonstration. All these climate catastrophes are
a demonstration of how out of alignment we have been
with our elemental environment. That's that's obvious. But they are
fucking pissed, like I am taking that ship back and

(26:35):
we are, you know, we are what is it called,
I can't think of the word. We're the collateral damage.
We're the collateral damage. So so so yeah, so so
the house was gone, and so that that shook, That
shook that shook our that shook the obviously, it shook
us to our core. And and you know, and particularly
the fire started in the shrine room, I was like, wow,

(27:00):
if that's not saying something, you know, And so it's like,
was that bad karma? You know, some folks are like,
well you got bad karmea has burned down and had
bad karma. And I'm like, was it bad karma or
was it really intense karma? Because the house was on
the market a week before and we were well insured
and we ended up receiving from insurance. Sure, we had

(27:22):
to give up absolutely fucking everything, but you don't non attachment,
but our insurance payout ended up being twice what we
would have gotten for the sale of the house. So
is it bad karma or is it intense karma? It
a liberated us and allowed us to you know, to
we were planning on relocating to Costa Rica, and it
allowed us to speed up our relocation plans by you know,

(27:46):
six months to a year. So again, is it bad
karma or was it really I'm going to say intense karma.
I'm gonna say that for me. You know, like part
of the vision that I saw that night was Vadri
Yoghini taking our house as an offering. We had just
like we had just remodeled that house. We had just
put in beautiful floors, we had just bought all this

(28:08):
new furniture. That's why we wanted to sell it like
as a walk away, like fully furnished, because the house
was meticulous, like I love creating contrac temple, sacred space,
and the entire house was a tauntric temple. And we
had just purchased this smoke offering. We were gonna do
smoke offerings burnt offerings to the Buddhas, and we had

(28:31):
just purchased smoke offering and had was we're keeping it
in the shrine, And when I cleared the shrine, I
left the smoke offering on the shrine just in case.
So the entire so the fire started in the shrine room,
and it went up as a smoke offering to the bikini. WHOA,

(28:52):
that's authentic, tadri yo. I burned my whole house down,
So me a nice to say that catalyzed like so much,

(29:19):
like so another you know, just another overview of like
the impact of her house burning down. So what we
had in that house, So it was myself living there,
doctor Eric's and my husband living there, and Laurie McCracken,
one of our senior instructors for the institute, and who's
just like such a gem, and I'm so grateful to
have her as part of our little familiar, our little

(29:40):
spiritual family here. We still live with her now. And
the wild thing is is all three of our parents
had passed. Chris's mom is still alive, but his dad
had passed, My mom had passed, my my brother has passed,
my father has passed. And Laurie's both her mother and
father had pass So we had all of our family

(30:02):
heirlooms in that house, all of our family karma in
that house. So Chris had all of the stuff from
his father that his father had bequeathed to him. I
had stuff from my mother and my father. I had
historical records. My father's family was African American. My father

(30:26):
had information about her family tree. He had traced our
familial lineage back to the first West African who had
been kidnapped and enslaved in eighteen o six, So he
had her paperwork and all of the subsequent paperwork since
then that his family had kept all of the records

(30:49):
from the time they were kidnapped and enslaved to their emancipation,
to the first purchase of their property in Adrian, Michigan.
They helped They were instrumental in establishing one of the
major hubs of the underground railroad in Adrian, Michigan. We
had paperwork associated with that, so we had like history.
I had all of my brother's stuff. My brother passed

(31:10):
away in twenty sixteen, and so I had all of
my brother's stuff. Lauri had the heirlooms and the ashes
of both her mother and her father. I had my
mother's ashes in the house. So the family karma that
was in that home that went up in literally as
a smoke offering. Like the layers and layers and layers

(31:33):
and layers of karmic purification that we have experienced and
continued to experience from that are like, there's no way
we could I don't even think we can fathom it.
You know, sometimes I get a glimpse and there's no
way way we could possibly articulate it. But you know,
suffice it to say the fire is transformative, that's an understatement.

(31:55):
And so we've been going through that transformation. That's what's
been happening for us for the past two years, right,
So that is what has initiated many of these like
twists and turns. And I'm going to say clarifications this
evolutionary process these last two years in which we have
come into I would say, crystal clarity about how we

(32:16):
want to move forward and what we're letting go of
in order to move forward.

Speaker 1 (32:23):
Wow, Daby, that's just in sense, it's really intense. Yeah, Yeah,
I remember that time and seeing those videos and pictures
of that giant columns of smoke lifting up over the forest,
and yeah, hearing the blow by blow of your flight,
and I had no idea that all three of you

(32:46):
lost all of those heirlooms in the fire as well.

Speaker 2 (32:52):
Yeah, talking about a purge like it really just feels
like the karming like it just two years out and
even at the time, I will say, even at the time,
like I had like there's the human trauma of it,
but there's also like the spiritual perspective that that that
we all three shared of it, and all three of
us were like, we felt like it was it was,

(33:13):
it was beautiful, it was it was an offering, and
it just felt like it actually transformed that karma from
our familial lineage or at least, you know, facilitator initiated
the transformation of you know, of of of the karma
of of our literal genetic lineage. And so, you know,

(33:35):
looking back, it's like to you know, two years later,
looking back and like how I was still functioning, you know,
through and like still trying to like TCB and all that.
And I look back and I'm like, y'all should have
just put me out to pasture, man, like I should
have put myself out to pastor. But I had that
spiritual overview. I'm like, no, this is fine, this is fine.
And yet on the physical, physiological and you know, in

(33:58):
human level, I was like, you know, it's been fucking brutal.
It's been brutal. It's been brutal. So so both and
two things at the same time, so needless to say,
as I said, this has initiated transformation, healing, and change
in relationship to our work in the world because what

(34:21):
we do is grounded in true authentic contra it is
grounded in lineage, it is grounded in our spiritual yoga practice,
and therefore inside outside saying, what transforms, how we transform

(34:42):
internally is going to be reflected in how we show
up externally and professionally and the business. And this brings
me to why many of these changes, these recent changes
have been initiated, and that is because through this process,
what has become very clear for me is that it

(35:05):
is necessary and it is time to disentangle my spiritual path.
My spiritual but this is the word I want to
look like that, like that, I have a sensation in
my body and there isn't quite a word to encapsulate
my spiritual devotion. It is time to uncouple my spiritual

(35:28):
devotion from a certification training program, a professionally credentialed certification
training program, because for me, it is too personal and
it is too precious. I cannot do business with my
spiritual practice because is because it is so profound and

(35:51):
so sacred and so personal for me that I have
such profound needs for integrity and ethics around it. And
that doesn't always translate to handing people a professional certification.

(36:15):
Not to say that we haven't, you know, we do
it with integrity and ethics, it's just when there's money involved,
and when there's capitalism involved, you know, the motivation isn't pure.
It's not a pure motivation, right, there's like, hey, we
need to get people in this program. And you know,
and and and for many of our graduates, the beauty
of the certification program is that it has given many

(36:38):
of our graduates a pathway of alignment. It has given
them a spiritual tradition to anchor into, It has given
them spiritual vision and again authentic spiritual practices. And in
this day and age, all in New Age effery, I'm
trying to not cuss so much. I'll tell you why,
like maybe trying not to guess so much. So, but

(37:04):
in this day and age of spiritual effery being rooted
and anchored and an authentic spiritual tradition that has thousands
of years of history and lineage and tradition is rare
and precious, precious gift. And so that has you know,
sustained me and us for so long. And and yet

(37:29):
as I said, it has come, it has come to
the time to separate those two, to uncouple conscious uncouplings,
corious odds, and so as I was, as I was saying,
and I'll shut up so you can finally talk to
as I was saying, what we have done. The certification

(37:52):
program for the last decade has been so precious and
so profound in helping people align with the spiritual tradition.
And there have been numerous people that have come through
the program in which they haven't been looking for a
new spiritual tradition. They just want to heal. They just
want holistic healing methods. They and rightly so, they want

(38:14):
to know and learn and embody how to be you know,
how to heal and transform the relationship to their sexuality.
And they want to be able to provide that service
to other people. And that is a valid and beautiful thing,
and they don't necessarily resonate with the spiritual component of it.
And for me, that is intolerable for me. If I
am teaching TNTRA, if I am certifying you in Tantra,

(38:37):
you must be rooted in tntra. You must pay homage
to the lineage. You must pay homage to the Black
de Kini Naguma. You must follow the codes and conditions
and conduct of the Shank Book Hagu lineage in this tradition,
And that is a different conversation. Then I want to

(39:03):
be a professional in the field of holistic sexology, you
know what I mean? Like being viscerally aligned with a
spiritual tradition is one path. Being a practitioner of holistic

(39:23):
sexual healing methods can be the same path, but it
doesn't have to be and it isn't necessarily the same path.
And for me, my passion and devotion and fierce connection
to my to my relationship with God like that is

(39:45):
non negotiable. I was a monk at the age of
twenty three. I took vows at the age of twenty three.
I committed my life to spiritual realization. Even though I say,
fuck bitch, I've been meditating and masturbating for you know,
sin since I was twenty three like that, and I'm
fifty now over a quarter of a century. This is

(40:07):
my passion, and my passion and my business. My passion
can fuel my business, but my passion does not have
to be a commodity a certification program through my business.
Does that make sense?

Speaker 1 (40:27):
It does?

Speaker 2 (40:27):
It does.

Speaker 1 (40:28):
And in addition to so many people wanting to come
in for the holistic sexology and not necessarily wanting the spirituality,
Vadriyana tantra is intense, right like everything we've just been
talking about, Like, just because you do it, doesn't mean
your house will burn down, but it's the swift but
it might. It's a swift path, right they call it

(40:49):
the swift path, and what that means is that you
transform rapidly. And if any of you out there have
been doing spiritual pursuits, you know the transformation is not
necessarily pretty. It has beautiful outcomes. You live a better life,
and you get when you get to the other end
of it. But it's intense. What did the monks say,

(41:09):
vadriana best best not to begin, but if you've begun,
best to finish quickly, right Like, it's it's a really
intense path that you really should only go on if
you really resonate with it. And so many of our
students have walked the path and have found it and
have and have resonated. It's been there it's been their karma,

(41:32):
it's been whatever they've gotten into it and been like, yes,
this is for me. I'm that way, right. I came
in for the sex and I stayed for the Vadriyana.
But while that is the case for so many students,
there were many students or that just that just wasn't
appropriate for them, and the transformation of Vasriyana was too much,

(41:56):
just too much.

Speaker 2 (41:59):
And wasn't appropriate, right, And it's not fair to me.
I'm like, it's not fair to make you step onto
the path of Vadriano, which is a ball buster to
quote Blake Lively, bust your balls with teeth, ball bitche
We using teeth on this ball buster, right, So yeah,

(42:20):
we bite it, we bust it, we bite it so
that but we don't that's Vitriana. Vana will bust you,
and it will bite you, and it will transform you
from the inside out. So even though, like you know,
I've had all this like gut wrenching and eviserating transformation,
I'm like, I mean, the the evolution and and the

(42:41):
healing and the well being that results from it, it's
really not for it's not for everybody, and so it's
not fair as I was saying, it's not fair to
require you to have your you know, to to to
step on a spiritual path that may not be right
for you in order to become certified to you know,

(43:05):
to support people in sexual healing. And so based on that,
we were like, well, let's give the world a holistic
healing certification program that draws from again our twenty seven

(43:28):
years of combined expertise as well as some of the
most precious pieces of the Authentic Tuntra certification program that
aren't specifically tontra. Right, because the Authentic Tuntra certification was
rooted in and you know, continue to be rooted in
the Tibetan five element non sexual and sexual teachings and

(43:52):
woven with modern understanding, because like that is authentic TNTRA.
Like in our lineage, it's says in the text and
the scriptures, like authentic tontra should evolve, it should emanate
in any time period in a way that is going
to be congruent with that time period. So authentic TNDRE

(44:13):
doesn't mean that you have to be wedded to scripts
that were written to you know, transcripts and shit that
were written two thousand years ago. And that's the only
authentic tontra. That's what the classical tentra people like to say, Oh, well,
if it wasn't in this contric text. Meanwhile, there's like
how many millions of contric texts that have yet to
be transcribed, So like, you don't know all the tentre

(44:35):
there is, you haven't even read it. You don't even
know there're shit that you that's hidden in fucking caves
you haven't fucking even encountered yet, you know. But for
the classical tentra people, it's like, well, if it isn't
written in this contract text, and meanwhile, our authentic contric tradition.
The shank Pa Cagulinia says that authentic contra should evolve

(44:57):
to meet the needs of the human beings in the
time period that they exist in. So it is completely
congruent with our lineage to have woven modern understanding and
to support you in the application of these methods. That
is congruent with our tradition. And so we we have

(45:21):
harvested that's right where it's kind of a gross work.
We we are, But I'm gonna use the word we've
harvested extracted mm hmm. I don't mind.

Speaker 1 (45:35):
Harvested some of picking apples from a tree roots netar.

Speaker 2 (45:41):
Yes, some of the most, some of the most you know,
some of the holistic healing methods, some of the and
some of the methods and and and and practices that
arose from my my tauntra practice that aren't necessarily or
specifically tntraus. So, for example, my pleasure journal practice that
you can find and shake your soul song like that

(46:03):
is a result of my tontra practice, but it is
not specifically tontra. So there are pieces like that that
we that we are translating into this holistic Sexology certification
training program so that there is there's still the richness
and the robustness and the embodiment of the authentic Contra

(46:23):
certification program without the Vadriyana tntra methods, that is what
will not be included anymore. We are not certifying you
in Vadriyana tantrum methods anymore. Yah, that's not happening because
the Elena and I are no longer willing to carry
the karmic burden of what that entails.

Speaker 1 (46:46):
Yeah, yeah, and only say we're not certifying you in
Vajorana tantra anymore specifically, that doesn't mean that we're not
doing a lot of the things that you might associate
with tntra, right, Like, there's going to be a lot
of different sexual methods that give you embodiment and healing
and all of those wonderful things that a lot of
people associate with neo tantra in today's world. If this

(47:11):
is your first time here, you haven't listened to Daaby
in the past, you might not know that we define
tntra differently than in other spaces, right, So, we define
contra as weaving light with sound and form, and when
we're doing that, we are taking these five element energies
that we teach. We teach five element meditations and we

(47:33):
teach how to use them as a meditation, meditative non
sexual practice, and also how to weave that energy into
your sexual practice. So that energy weaving, that is what
we're talking about. That's the thing that's beautiful, wonderful, very
intense that needs to be uncoupled from that. The actual
practices you know, of learning different masturbation practices, learning different

(47:57):
intimate practices with your partner, the physical sexual practices, those
are still in many cases there in our training, They're
just we're just not leaving that energy work with them.

Speaker 2 (48:10):
We're no longer teaching the Energy Body Yoga of Authentic
Lineage based Contra as a certification program. So this is
where the distinction is really important, because we are still
offering these methods for your personal healing. So for those
of you who are do feel drawn to the Tibetan
five Element practices, who want to learn energy Body Yoga

(48:35):
for your own personal healing practice, who want to cultivate
an enriching an embodied relationship with themselves, their sexuality, their environment,
who want to learn authentic lineage based contra, we are
still teaching TNTRA for your personal healing. We're just no
longer certifying teachers in TONTRA. We are so defying people

(49:01):
to be holistic sexology instructors holistic sexologists period And because
we are authentic, we cannot refrain from excellence. We cannot
refrain from excellence, and so our Holistic Sexology Certification Program

(49:23):
registration will be launching this fall. Registration will open this fall.
Will also be the only government accredited as well as
a sect approved holistic sexology certification in the market. So
once again we are ringing the bell of excellence because

(49:45):
that is what we are committed to in the offerings
that we deliver to you. Ethics and integrity, and so
those spiritual values are still woven into how we do business.
We're just not requiring you to step in to our
spiritual tradition in order to do business with us. Hey yeah, yeah, yeah,

(50:08):
And was it I think I was gonna say something
else about that. Well, you know, I don't want this
episode to just turn into a dissertation and like a
sales pitch on the Holistic Sexology certification. So I have
one more thing that I do want to say about
it from from my point of view, is that go
to Holistic Sexology Institute dot com. That is our new url,
Holistic Sexology Institute dot com. And we do have a

(50:31):
sign up page for the certification training program, so as
more information becomes available, you know, sign up for the waitlist,
we will be sending you emails and then registration. We've
you know, our intention is October first, but it does
need to go through the government review process, and y'all
know how governments are, So we're shooting for October first,
but we might need to bump a registration early registration

(50:54):
a little bit, you know, a few weeks to ensure
that it gets through the government bureaucracy funnel before we
can open the doors on it fully and open registration
on it. But if you sign up for that wait list,
you will be in the know. You will be the
first at all when doors open on the Holistic Sexology,
the only government accredited, a sect approved holistic sexology certification

(51:17):
on the market.

Speaker 1 (51:19):
Awesome, And Dati, I know you don't want to stick
on stick on host stick Sexology, but can I give
just my top line favorite points about it?

Speaker 2 (51:25):
I want you to talk about it that I want
you to talk about it. Okay.

Speaker 1 (51:32):
So we've been building this program for the last year
and we're really really excited. So Davy and I and
our colleagues have been working together on building this extraordinary
program where we do so many of the things we
did with the ATCP, which is Authentic Countra Certification program,
but also we get to really dive deep into some
of these other places that we have never really been

(51:55):
able to explore before. So it's a year long program,
So it's going to be delivered synchronously, but you will
have a ton of support which is something that I
think makes this program really different from other things that
are out there. As Davy said, government accredited, a SECT
approved is our goal. You have multiple one on one

(52:16):
sessions with a primary instructor, so you're really getting that
time to connect and deepen with someone who's been doing
this work for a long period of time. Our faculty
is incredible. They're amazing for people, all of them is amazing. Yeah,
I could go on and on about how extraordinary they are,

(52:37):
and I lost my train of thought thinking about how
great they are. So you get one on one support
with our amazing faculty to deepen into everything that you're learning.
So you're not just sitting there watching videos being like
how do I use this information. We include an extraordinary
level of embodiment so that you're actually learning these practices,
practicing them, and getting them in your own body so

(52:59):
that after you learn and all of these amazing things,
you're able to teach from your own experience of them.
And we'll be releasing it probably twice a year in
cohorts so that we will encourage you to connect with
the other people on that cohort form study groups. So
we're really working and designing this to be. It really

(53:21):
just really an excellent, excellent program that will prepare you
to be able to walk out into the world and
help others.

Speaker 2 (53:30):
And it will be an actual academic experience. So that
is one of you know, again, we've been delivering the
Authentic Contra Certification program together for a decade, for over
a decade, and what we have seen over this decade
is the bonding that occurs in each cohort, Like it

(53:50):
has been so beautiful to witness that because it's because
you know, because it's a spiritual path, right, these are
the bond and each cohort has its own karma, right,
and these are people that you have lived many lifetimes
with potentially, and so the bonding and the cohesion that
has occurred for each cohort has been really beautiful to witness,

(54:11):
and so we wanted to retain that in this new
program and so we're delivering it as an actual academic
experience where where there's you know, registration, you're gonna have
a cohort, and we're gonna encourage you to set up
study groups. We're encouraging you to you know, there will
be discussion forums that will be led by doctor doctor
Professor Chris Erickson. So we really want it to be

(54:34):
like an online academic experience similar to what we've been
delivering together for over a decade, but even more like
even more expansive. I would say, because you know, again,
Tontra is is my spiritual path, but it isn't the
spiritual path for everybody. I'll say it again. And so
what I love about the Holist sex Sexology certification is

(54:57):
that it opens up the playing field for folks who
may not be interested in tntra but very interested in
holistic sexual healing, because the two are not necessarily the same.
Unlike the way neo Tantra is presented, Tandra is not
only about about sexual healing. Tandra is about cultivating realization
from the inside out and transforming karma and transforming your reality.

(55:20):
Our lineage of Tondre is a shamanistic tradition. It's about
working with the energy of our own body or energy body,
and working with the energy of the elementals and affecting
and causing transformation, healing and bringing benefit to ourselves and others.
And we have done the phenomenal job of doing that

(55:43):
for you know, for again for the last decade, and
so I love the wisdom and the beauty of again
transforming into to opening it up, opening up the pathway
for more people to benefit from the richness that we've cultivated,
uh for again the last decade. So so we're very

(56:06):
excited about this. I know now it sounds like a
sales pitch and a little bit it is. And we
we're you know, we we we we feel really fucking
good about this. So this is why we and we
also you know again, so this is this episode is
about like why we change. So we've changed our business
name to the Institute of Holistic Sexology because that is

(56:28):
our focus. And again it's because it opens up the
playing field because the reality is is again entre is
you know, the foundation of everything we say and do,
but it isn't the totality of everything we say, say
and do. Uh, And so we want we're broadening horizons
and that is also why we are you know, we

(56:50):
rebooted sex Is Medicine instead of just flowing with tauntra talks.
It's because, you know, a Sexist Medicine is an award
winning podcast and some of y'all have been loving and
you know, uplifting for over a decade Thank you so
much to all of you, and thank you so much
to all of you who are here now who are newbies. Newbies,

(57:10):
we so so appreciate you. Like and subscribe, Like and subscribe,
and make sure you comment below. But we wanted, we
wanted to do sexist medicine because it's a broader umbrella.
We love Tontra, and we're gonna continue doing at least
one Tentra episode a month, at least one entrare episode
that's devoted to tuns. We're gonna do at least one
of those a month for your specific contra questions and

(57:32):
again to mystify, decode and you know, and and d whatever,
d fuckery Tontra. We're gonna do that once a month.
But we want, we want to talk about a whole
spectrum of well being for ourselves as as humanity, as

(57:52):
human beings and so you know, to me again, needs
for needs for integrity, like I don't want to call
something tondra if it isn't tom Ra, right, So, so
we want to broaden the horizons. We want to talk
all things holistic sexology. We want to bring our over
twenty seven years of combined expertise to the table, and
we want to answer your questions. We want to we

(58:12):
want to feed you. We want to feed you from
the from the buffet of wisdom and knowledge that we've
been had, the privilege and the the uh, you know,
the devotion to to cultivate and to to collect My words,
are not coming to me? Help me out here, relate us?

(58:34):
What the fuck have we been doing?

Speaker 1 (58:39):
Yes, we really want to answer your questions and and
really go deep into the incredible variety that is available
to speak about in human sexuality. And I think one
of the things that we've always been so excited about
is is talking about your questions, giving you that information.

(58:59):
But from the perspective of our sexuality is a huge
part of our lives, and it's a part of us
that is often hidden in our culture, and it's a
subject that is difficult to discern what's true and what's not,
and is becoming more and more difficult to discern that.
So it is such a beautiful part of ourselves, and

(59:20):
it's beautiful to It's a gift to be a part
of other people's transformation through their own sexual wellness.

Speaker 2 (59:33):
It is a gift. And the other thing I want
to say is y'all have to get in some really
bad information on this internet. Elena has been sending me,
as we've been doing building this program, Elena has been
sending me some of these videos with these you know,
some of these sex sexuality influencers that have like, you know,
millions of followers, and you know, hundreds of thousands of

(59:53):
people are looking at this stuff and they're giving you
bad advice. They are giving you better you know why,
because they don't have expertise. They maybe good at branding
and marketing, but that doesn't mean that they're knowledgeable about
sexuality or that they have the depth of knowledge about sexuality.
And so I'm concerned for you. I am mama. Mama
Davi's concerned. Mama David's concerned for y'all some of the

(01:00:16):
information that y'all are getting. So so Elena has sent
me a whole list of myths that we're going to
be busting and concerning things that we are going to
be addressing because we want to make sure that you
have the right information. And this information is that we
and that we offer is pulled from medical journals, it's

(01:00:37):
pulled from sexual wellness journals, it's pulled from books, that
we've read from experts again over you know, almost twenty
seven years, and it's pulled from again our own embodied
experience and expertise. Supporting people with these methods like it
is a big deal. I've been working one on one

(01:00:57):
and in group coaching settings with individs to support them
in sexual healing for seventeen years. Elaine has been doing
it for over a decade. That is expertise, and that
is what we want to bring to the table. I
wanted to give you a little example of how of

(01:01:17):
how like how the landscape has changed. When I first
started teaching sexual TNTRA and I was learning about female
general anatomy, the clitter what we now know call the
clitoral bulbs were not part of the clatorus. They were
referred to as the vestibular bulbs. And if you made

(01:01:39):
the mistake of including them as part of the clatorus,
it was the three part No, it was the two
part glatorus. You had the clitteral legs and the clearal
shafting glands, and that was it. Don't you dare call
those vestibular bulbs part of the clatorus or you would
be shamed because that was not science. You are ignorant.

(01:02:02):
Look that was like in two thousand and eight. Turn
around two years later, twy ten, twenty eleven. Now, based
on the results of a female sexology researcher, the vestibular
bulbs are now the clinteral bulbs. Why because they contain
the same erectile tissue they can it's the corpus spongiosum.

(01:02:23):
It's the same rectum. Yeah, it's just is it the
cavernos No, it's a spongiosum, right, Are the bulbs the
legs of the cavernosa and the bulbs are the spongiosum. Yeah,
So so it's it's the same a rectil tssue that
makes up the penis, y'all. Like the clatorus is is
your is the penis turn inside out? Right? That's yeah,

(01:02:44):
that's what the penis is. Clatorus is inside out and
inianarity right. So so, but my point is is, like
I was in the field before the clitteral bulbs were
the clitoral bulbs, and then all of a sudden it's
the clear bulbs and that and now everybody says the
clear bulbs, But I'm saying, like if you just if
you were online as a sex educator and you just
got into the field a couple of years ago, like

(01:03:06):
you haven't seen this whole like evolution that has occurred.
And there's there's pieces, and they're not to throw shade,
but I'm just saying there's like there's context that that
you may be missing, because like there's history, and there's depth,
and there's you know, there's been evolution just in the

(01:03:29):
last seventeen years, just in the last ten years. And
I'm sorry, what were you gonna say, Lena, I was
running my back.

Speaker 1 (01:03:34):
Oh, it's way, it's way back there. I was just
gonna say that the literal system and the archtealit issue
of the penis have the same, uh, they have the
same biological origins.

Speaker 2 (01:03:44):
So that's all. Yeah, And that's the fun kind of
stuff that we want to talk with you about on
sex's medicine, and that's going to be in our in
our certification program of course of knowing the nuances, Like
we've got a whole section on like intersex justice and
intersex anatomy, and it's delicious and particularly in this day
and age, like y'all, sex is political and I don't think, well,

(01:04:07):
I'm not even I was about to say, I don't
think there was a time when it hasn't been more true. Bitch.
Sex has been political from inception. We've been living under
patriarchy and like oppression for you know, thousands of years.
So all, it's always a good time. It's always a
good time. It's always been a good time to bring
this type of sexual awareness and education and inclusion into

(01:04:28):
the conversation, inclusion of all of our humanity, y' all,
because we don't just fit in these two little boxes.
There's a whole fucking spectrum, a whole rainbow. And there
I am cussing again. I'm trying to not. I'm trying
to not. I'm trying not. And the reason that I'm
trying to not is the algorithms, y'all. The algorithms are things.

(01:04:49):
So make sure you like and subscribe join this on
YouTube so you can see my pretty bedroom, like and
subscribe and Elena's gorgeous face. You don't want to miss that.
But so I'm trying to cuss less because some y'all
don't like me cussing so much, and I need to
bend into a pretzel to fit your needs. Just kidding,
but alsoe the algorithm. Algorithm doesn't like it, but I

(01:05:11):
wanted to just take a quick moment. This is a
very long episode, but I think it should be justifiably
so because this is our like reboot is, I just
want to take a moment to share with you why
I cuss so much. Because cussing is political, because language
is political, and because if you kind of like, you know,
look at the overview of language in Western culture, it

(01:05:33):
is there is a prescription of what is appropriate and
what is not appropriate, what is proper and what is improper,
and who determines that is usually the power structure, and
who is the power structure held by well we all
know those words, right right, male, colonialist, patriarchal blah blah blah.

(01:05:57):
Those are the terms of engagement, though are those are
the rules? And so who gets to swear is is
depends on social capitals. So, for instance, what I've noticed,
because I observe this, I don't just like consume shit mindlessly,
like I actually watch, like, what the what the f

(01:06:18):
is happening? And so in my observations, wealthy white men
are allowed to swear all they want, Like look at
Bill Mayer. However, you say his name he's got the cable.
He fucking fuck. He couses all day long. Like people
on cable news are allowed to cuss. They're white men
are allowed to cuss, and some white women, like Chelsea Handler,

(01:06:41):
She's allowed to cuss. And some other white women are
allowed to cuss because it makes them edgy, and it
makes them empowered and it makes them funny. You know.
I think there's like the number one podcast which is
Call Me Daddy or something. I was reading about that.
I've never listened to it, so I don't know if
she cusses, but when I was reading the article, it
sounds like she cusses. She's like, talk like a guy.
And you know, so, I mean so again, white woman.

(01:07:01):
So white men and some white women, when they have
the approval from white men, are allowed to cuss. But me,
as a multiracial, you know, black anchored woman with African
heritage cussing, I'm just ghetto. You know, I'm just low rent.
I'm just low vibration. They call me low vibration. I'm

(01:07:24):
a Tontrica and so I dance in the hell realms.
I'm a Vadrian Tontriga who dances in the hell realms.
So I don't actually live with a judgment of low vibration.
I will devour low vibration and shot out rainbows. That's
what I do with low vibrations. I transform them into
fucking rainbows. That's what I do. So the cussing isn't
about for me, it's there's like, I don't have judgment

(01:07:47):
about it in the same way that society does. For me,
a cussing is part of my self expression. That's also
part of my empowerment. It's also about me reclaiming my
right to express myself however the fuck want to, whenever
I want to. And I don't have judgment about good
words bad words, except for you know what a bad
word is for me? Geo side that's a bad word

(01:08:11):
for me. A bad word for me is racism. A
bad word for me is canceling benefits for underprivileged folks.
A bad word for me is is ice. That's a
bad word for me, ice, kidnapping people. Those are bad words,
those are bad actions, right. And so for those of

(01:08:32):
you who bristle at cussing and think you know it's
low vibration, like, I'm gonna invite you to just examine
your what you find acceptable in this culture, and examine
maybe why you find it acceptable, Like do you do
you throw shade at women who cuss, but then play
video games where you're blowing people's heads off? That's okay

(01:08:53):
for you? Right? Do you do you look down and
consider low vibration women women who but yet you like
to watch TV shows where people are beating each other
to death and Quentin Tarantino movies where you're literally watching
people's heads explode in front of you, but that's okay.
Physical violence and watching people murder being murdered is okay,

(01:09:16):
that's not low vibration. But me saying, what the fuck
is low vibration? You know? I mean it's like and
maybe both are true, maybe both are low vibration. But
look look at what is acceptable and tolerable, and look
at what you are willing and choosing to ingest and
normalize as acceptable when it's actually horrific. It's actually horrific,

(01:09:46):
just saying, you know, okay, So that was my soapbox.
It was like an hour plus soapbox. What were youna say, Lena?

Speaker 1 (01:09:59):
And also, deep cussing is good for you physiologically? Do yeah,
it's it's they found that it actually reduces stress levels,
it's good for your brain. So it's it's actually a
way of reversing all of them, not reversing, but like
gaining getting relief from all of the bad things. Cussing
is it's empowering.

Speaker 3 (01:10:22):
Yeah, where we don't want to see or feel other
people's emotions or them dealing with it, then we're often
not encouraged to puss, as you said.

Speaker 2 (01:10:33):
See, so I love that. So what you just said, Ay,
So for me, cussing feels like like cutting through obstacles.
It feels like for me breaking curses instead of giving curses.
It actually feels like breaking curses. But also what I'm
hearing you say is it helps disperse toxic stress. Right.
And I was just reading an article. I'm sure some
of y'all are aware, but I was just reading an
article the other day about how it was, you know,

(01:10:56):
it was circling about a month ago on social media
about how chronic stress and particularly emotional repression, there's a
link between, specifically for women, emotional repression, so not expressing
our emotions authentically, and chronic illness and chronic disease. Right, So,

(01:11:17):
particularly for us women, for those those of us who
identify as women in this culture, like we're taught like
good girls, right, don't no, no, no, not to stuff it.
And those stuffed emotions cause illness. We know that that
is a factual thing, right, So this is our licensed
Lady Elena just gave us license, ladies to to cuss
it up. The algorithm doesn't like it. So I'm still

(01:11:39):
going to try and refrain. I'm gonna try and refrain.
But but also I'm sure I have never thought about it.

Speaker 1 (01:11:47):
Also, it's a it's a privilege to to not in
many ways if you think about So we talked about
who's in power. Right, So white men for the most part,
are allowed to cuss, but they're also are allowed not to.
They live lives that are more comfortable than others, and

(01:12:08):
there is a class issue there as well. Right, Well,
white people have the privilege of not cussing, whereas other communities.
You know, it's a more part of the culture, and
it's more part of you know, they live, they work
jobs that are more stressful or this or that. I mean,
not everyone is involved in that, but I guess the

(01:12:29):
perspective but I'm coming from is that my family are labors, right,
and in a laboring community, cussing is a huge part
of the work that you do because it's a difficult
it's a difficult job, it's a hard, stressful job, and
so cussing is a part of relieving that stress.

Speaker 2 (01:12:47):
So thank you for that.

Speaker 1 (01:12:49):
Might not be for every culture that does communicate, that
does cuss, that might not be the case, but that
was one thought that I had, and.

Speaker 2 (01:12:57):
Well, you're totally corrected. Is a classist issue, it is.
It is a classic issue again, low rent, low vibration, ghetto,
those are all classes and those are projected onto you know,
particularly women of color when we come out fighting. You know,
like it's a way, it's a way. It's a tool
of oppression for me, like or and not just for

(01:13:18):
me like that's it's a political thing. There's Mona Eltaway
is an author that I read who who really is
like you know, is an advocate for cussing because she
says exactly that that it's classist and that it's that
it's a power, it's a power dynamic, and it's used
as a tool to discount and oppress. So so that's that.

(01:13:39):
So I think this this has been a long episode.
It's been a good episode. It's been our reboot episode.
Welcome back, everybody to sex Is Medicine. So delighted, so
excited for all of us to be here, cannot wait
to roll out this season. So a few changes to

(01:14:00):
the way we're gonna do things. A We're gonna have seasons.
We're gonna have actual seasons, so we're gonna have start
dates and end dates. So each season is gonna be
out be about three months long. So this season, Season
one of Sexist Medicine Reboot is going to go September, October, November,
and then we're gonna take a break in December and
be back in January of twenty twenty six, y'all. And also,

(01:14:22):
as I was saying before, every third episode that we
do UH is gonna be focused on contra. So send
us your questions, so your countra questions for us to
answer them. And then also with each episode Leanna and
I want to address We're gonna take the first ten
minutes or so to address a hot topic. So something
some some effery that we see in the media that

(01:14:45):
I'm like at one o'clock in the morning when I'm
on my phone when i have insomnia, which doesn't happen
so much anymore that I live in Costa Rica, thank
you very much. But sometimes when I'm on my phone
late at night and I see these articles come across,
I'm like, ag, it's my blood prosure up. I'm like,
that's so wrong, or hm, that's an interesting perspective. Let's
tease that out a little bit. So anyway, I'm sending
these to to Elena. I often about context, and we're

(01:15:09):
gonna be going through these and we're gonna be discussing
some hot topics again to you know, to to offer
more perspective on some of these topics celebrity sex and
you know, and social sexuality things, and then we're gonna
dive into the content for the episode. And already I
just want to celebrate that we announced that Sex's medicine

(01:15:29):
was back. Good to come back, like I don't know,
like what a couple of weeks ago, and I've already
getting interview requests. Selena I had a really really awesome
one come in just yesterday. So we are gonna do
We are going to do some interviews. It's not gonna
be every episode, because Elena I have way too much
that we want to talk about to do every episode,

(01:15:51):
but we are going to do some some some interviews
with some really important people in the field, really important
and we're going to continue to target underrepresented voices as
much as possible. In the field of sexology, it's always possible.
So I'm just gonna say, we're going to focus on

(01:16:11):
uplifting underrepresented voices to bring their expertise and their wisdom
to the table and to all of you so that
we can have this mutual sharing, you know, of Like,
that's the thing I loved about Sex's Medicine. I'm going
to shut up soon. I promise, I'm going to shut
up soon. But that is one of the things that
I truly truly valued about having that having Sexist Medicine

(01:16:35):
for all those years is the incredible guests that I
got to interview. So all of you who were a
guest on Sex's Medicine before, thank you so much. You
enriched my life so much. You helped you nourished and
fed my expertise in the field, and you nourished and
fed the expertise of so many other people. So I've heard,

(01:16:59):
I've had a reflected to me that the Sexist Medicine
podcast could essentially be a PhD in the field of
human human sexuality. And it's because of you, the folks
that said yes to being on the show. That's why
you've contributed to a PhD in human sexuality I then
or not. So we're gonna hope to keep we are
going to keep that continuing. We're not going to just
hope to do it. We are going to do it.

(01:17:20):
We're going to keep that continuing U and continue to
just bring you the most credible ethical and integrity integris
if that's the word, I'll make it up. Integris Holistic
Sexuality Education on the market in the field. Twenty seven
years of combined expertise. Sho, that's hard to be. That's

(01:17:42):
like doctor Ruth right, yes, doctor Davy, doctor Elena, doctor Salks. Anyway, Also,
once again, I'm gonna remind you to like and subscribe.
If you are not watching this on YouTube, please do
go to our YouTube channel. We're trying to build that baby.
We're stuck because we're shadow band. We need to get

(01:18:04):
out of that shadow band. So go to YouTube at
Holistic Sexology Institute Holistic Sexology Institute, go ahead their like,
subscribe and hit that notification bell. Because we drop episodes
every Thursday. Okay, so every Thursday morning, a new episode
comes out. Like and subscribe Spotify iTunes, Like and subscribe
and leave us your comments. We want to hear and

(01:18:26):
we take feedback. So be kind, y'all, be kind to
our beautiful little tender hearts. I have complex post traumatic
stress disorder. I've done a lot of healing, but I'm
very sensitive to criticism. So I like constructive criticism. I
like constructive feedback, but please be kind and don't like
drag my ass through the mud. No, I need you

(01:18:47):
don't need to spank me. You don't need to spank me,
but we do want your feedback because we want we
want this. I want pleasure in your ear holes. I
want you to listen to this episode, and I want
want you to feel pleasure in your ears. And Elena
wants you to feel pleasure. And we want you to
have visual pleasure and audio pleasures. So let us know
how we can make your experience more pleasurable, my friends,

(01:19:08):
because we very much want to do that. And Okay,
so that's it, so we're gonna sign off. We will
be back next Thursday with another episode. Uh. Sex is Medicine.
Reboot by the Boom, by the Bang, by the Boom
by the Bank. Right we y'all by bike.

Speaker 1 (01:19:28):
You've been listening to sex is Medicine, your number one
resource for holistic sex education.

Speaker 2 (01:19:34):
Make sure you like and subscribe to Sex's Medicine on
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register for your weekly dose of sexes Medicine at Holistic
Sexology Institute dot com and send us your questions please

(01:19:56):
at Questions at Holistic Sexology Institute dot com. Thank you
so much for listening to sex is Medicine