November 11, 2024 • 11 mins
Welcome to Day 3 of the “Start Thinking Forward” 22-Day Challenge. Today, host Brandon L. Draper takes you on an intense, transformative journey into defining and living by your core values—the foundational beliefs that shape who you are, how you see yourself, and how you show up in the world.
This episode goes beyond surface-level motivation, diving deeply into the heart of what it means to live with integrity, build true self-worth, and stop compromising on the things that matter most.
With powerful, real-world stories, modern research on personal fulfillment, and exercises that challenge you to get brutally honest about who you are, this episode is designed to help you strip away everything that isn’t authentically you. Brandon’s in-your-face, heartfelt approach will push you to face the uncomfortable truths, redefine your values, and start making decisions that truly align with the life you want to live.
This episode isn’t for the faint of heart, but if you’re ready to discover what you stand for and live with greater purpose and courage, hit play. Special thanks to our sponsor, Serebro AI, for providing groundbreaking tools that empower you to align with your core values every single day.
Ready to take the first step toward a life that reflects your true self? Listen, share on iHeart Radio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you tune in, and join the movement toward authenticity, self-worth, and transformation.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/start-thinking-forward-podcast--1229199/support.
This episode goes beyond surface-level motivation, diving deeply into the heart of what it means to live with integrity, build true self-worth, and stop compromising on the things that matter most.
With powerful, real-world stories, modern research on personal fulfillment, and exercises that challenge you to get brutally honest about who you are, this episode is designed to help you strip away everything that isn’t authentically you. Brandon’s in-your-face, heartfelt approach will push you to face the uncomfortable truths, redefine your values, and start making decisions that truly align with the life you want to live.
This episode isn’t for the faint of heart, but if you’re ready to discover what you stand for and live with greater purpose and courage, hit play. Special thanks to our sponsor, Serebro AI, for providing groundbreaking tools that empower you to align with your core values every single day.
Ready to take the first step toward a life that reflects your true self? Listen, share on iHeart Radio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you tune in, and join the movement toward authenticity, self-worth, and transformation.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/start-thinking-forward-podcast--1229199/support.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, everyone, Welcome back to the Start Thinking Forward podcast.
I'm Brandon L. Draper, and this is day three of
our twenty two day journey to rewrite your story and
reshape your life. Over the past couple of days, we've
uncovered some powerful truths about who you are beneath all
the layers, and we've started challenging the beliefs that keep
(00:22):
you from living fully. Today, we're diving even deeper into
what it means to live in alignment with your true self,
with your core values. Let me start by saying this.
Your values are the core of who you are. They're
what guide your decisions, shape your relationships, and build the
(00:43):
foundation for your self worth. But the reality is many
people go through life without ever really defining or living
by their true values. They're caught up in what society expects,
in what looks good, in what others want from them,
and they lose touch with themselves. If you're listening right now,
(01:04):
I want you to know you don't have to keep
living that way. You can live a life that's aligned
with what you truly care about, and I'm here to
help you discover how. But be prepared. This work isn't easy.
It's going to require you to look honestly at your life,
to make some tough decisions, and to step into the
life you're meant to live. Let's start by talking about
(01:27):
why values are so powerful. Research in psychology shows us
that living in alignment with our values is one of
the strongest predictors of life satisfaction and mental health. According
to a study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology,
individuals who consistently align their actions with their core values
report higher levels of happiness, resilience, and life satisfaction. Why
(01:53):
because when you live according to your values, you're not
just going through the motions. You're living with purpose. Every decision,
every relationship, every goal you pursue is grounded in something real,
something that feels right to you. So let's talk about
what it feels like to live out of alignment with
your values, because that's where a lot of us are
(02:15):
right now. Picture a time when you made a decision
that went against what you knew deep down was right
for you. Maybe it was a job you took for
the paycheck even though it drained you. Maybe it was
a relationship you stayed in because it was comfortable, even
though you knew it wasn't meant to last. Or maybe
it was a habit you couldn't shake even though it
(02:37):
went against the person you wanted to be. How did
that feel? Probably not good. There's a reason for that.
When you ignore your values, you're ignoring who you truly are.
You're saying my peace, my happiness, my integrity, none of
that matters. But it does matter. And living in a
way that honors your values isn't just about feeling good.
(03:00):
It's about building a life you're proud of, a life
that feels like it's truly yours. I want to tell
you about Jessica, a woman I worked with a few
years ago. Jessica was in her late thirties. Successful by
society standards. She had a stable job, a nice home,
and a busy social life. But when she came to me,
(03:22):
she was exhausted, burnt out, and feeling empty. She told me, Brandon,
I don't even recognize myself anymore. I feel like I'm
just going through the motions. As we talked, it became
clear that Jessica had been living a life built on
what everyone else wanted for her. Her parents wanted her
to be successful, so she'd gone into a high paying
(03:46):
career that didn't fulfill her. Her friends expected her to
be fun and social, so she was always putting others'
needs before her own. She was living for everyone but herself.
And the worst part, she didn't even know what she wanted.
She'd spent so long ignoring her values that she'd forgotten
who she really was. Now I want you to take
(04:09):
a moment to do the same thing Jessica did. Grab
a notebook, find a quiet place, and ask yourself this question.
What truly matters to me? What are the non negotiable
values that define who I am? Some of you might
already know your core values. For others, this might feel challenging,
especially if you spent years trying to live up to
(04:29):
other people's expectations. And that's okay. Start with the basics.
Think about times when you felt truly alive, when you
felt at peace. What values were you living by in
those moments? Was it honesty, creativity, connection, freedom, or maybe growth?
Write down whatever comes to mind. For Jessica, her core
(04:50):
values turned out to be authenticity, creativity, and compassion. Once
she knew that, everything changed, she started making choices that
aligned with those values. She pursued a creative career. She
was passionate about, started spending more time with people who
valued her for who she was, and let go of
relationships that drained her and the change and her energy,
(05:14):
her confidence, her happiness. It was like night and day.
There's a powerful piece of research by doctor Susan David,
a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and an expert on
emotional agility. She found that people who live by their
core values not only experience greater life satisfaction, but also
show higher levels of resilience when facing challenges. Doctor David
(05:38):
calls it emotional courage, the courage to face your emotions,
to confront what's hard, and to live by what matters
most to you. No matter what does this mean for you,
it means that when you live by your values, you're
not just building a life you love. You're also building
a foundation that can withstand life's toughest moment. Because values
(06:01):
give you something to hold on to. They remind you
of who you are no matter what's happening around you.
Let me tell you another story about a man named Amir.
Amir grew up in a family that valued tradition, stability,
and loyalty above all else. He was taught to do
what's expected to not rock the boat, and for years
(06:23):
he did just that. He worked in the family business,
stayed in a relationship that everyone approved of, and followed
the path he was supposed to follow. But a Meir
felt trapped, like he was living in someone else's life.
One day, after a difficult breakup, Amir started asking himself
what he truly wanted. He realized that his core values
(06:46):
were freedom, adventure, and self expression, values that were completely
different from the life he was living. And even though
it was hard, Amir made the decision to step away
from the family business, to travel and to pursue a
career in creative writing. His family didn't understand, and some
of them even disapproved, but Emir knew he was finally
(07:07):
living in alignment with who he was and the freedom
he felt was worth everything. Now it's your turn. Take
a look at the values you wrote down and ask yourself,
where in my life am I out of alignment with
these values? Are there relationships that don't align with your values?
Are their habits, routines, or choices that go against what
(07:29):
you truly believe? Write down any areas where you feel
disconnected from your core values. This might bring up some
uncomfortable truths. But that's okay. This is where growth happens.
This is where you start reclaiming your life. Let's talk
about something most people don't want to face the price
of compromising on your values. When you ignore your core values,
(07:53):
you're betraying yourself. And over time that betrayal adds up.
It turns into self doubt, low self esteem, anxiety, even depression,
and the worst part, you might not even realize that's
what's happening. Let me tell you about a client I
worked with named Naomi. Naomi was a kind hearted, deeply
(08:14):
empathetic person. Her core values were compassion, honesty, and justice,
but she was working in an environment where dishonesty was
part of the daily routine. She was asked to lie,
to manipulate, to do things that went against everything she
believed in, and every day she felt her self worth
(08:36):
crumble a little more. Naomi tried to brush it off,
to tell herself it was just a job, but eventually
it caught up with her. She started feeling anxious, angry,
even depressed, and when we finally sat down together, it
was clear why she was living in direct opposition to
(08:56):
her values. She was betraying herself every every day. Once
she recognized that she made the difficult choice to leave
her job, even though it meant a temporary loss of stability,
and the relief she felt it was profound, she was
finally free to live in a way that honored who
she was. Look at your list of values and ask yourself,
(09:22):
where have I compromised? Where have I allowed others to
cross lines I needed to protect? Write down the boundaries
you need to set to protect your values. These boundaries
might be with other people, with work, or even with yourself.
And let me tell you, setting boundaries isn't selfish, it's
self respect. It's choosing to honor who you are no
(09:46):
matter what. Living by your values takes courage. It means
saying no to what doesn't align, even when it's uncomfortable.
It means standing up for yourself, even if it means
standing alone, And most importantly, it means being willing to
face whatever comes with integrity, knowing that you're staying true
(10:06):
to yourself. In a study published in the Journal of
Counseling Psychology, researchers found that people who live authentically experience
greater well being, stronger relationships, and increased resilience. Authenticity isn't
about being perfect, It's about being real. It's about showing
(10:27):
up as you are, with all your values, all your truth,
and all your imperfections. For the next week, commit to
one action every day that reflects your core values. This
might be saying no to something that doesn't align, having
an honest conversation, or pursuing a goal that truly matters
(10:47):
to you. Write down each action you take, and at
the end of the week, reflect on how it feels
to live in alignment with who you are. So today
we've gone deep. We've uncovered your value values, looked at
where you're out of alignment, and talked about what it
means to live authentically. This work isn't easy, but it's powerful.
(11:09):
When you live by your values, you're building a life
that's true to you. You're creating a foundation of self
worth that no one can take away. If this episode
resonated with you, share it with someone who might need it.
You can find us on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or
wherever you tune in. And thank you to our sponsor,
(11:30):
cerebra Ai, for creating tools that help you live with
purpose and integrity every day Until next time, keep pushing forward,
keep living with courage, and start thinking forward a life
that reflects the best of who you are. You deserve it.
Hey, everyone, Welcome back to the Start Thinking Forward podcast.
I'm Brandon L. Draper, and this is day three of
our twenty two day journey to rewrite your story and
reshape your life. Over the past couple of days, we've
uncovered some powerful truths about who you are beneath all
the layers, and we've started challenging the beliefs that keep
(00:22):
you from living fully. Today, we're diving even deeper into
what it means to live in alignment with your true self,
with your core values. Let me start by saying this.
Your values are the core of who you are. They're
what guide your decisions, shape your relationships, and build the
(00:43):
foundation for your self worth. But the reality is many
people go through life without ever really defining or living
by their true values. They're caught up in what society expects,
in what looks good, in what others want from them,
and they lose touch with themselves. If you're listening right now,
(01:04):
I want you to know you don't have to keep
living that way. You can live a life that's aligned
with what you truly care about, and I'm here to
help you discover how. But be prepared. This work isn't easy.
It's going to require you to look honestly at your life,
to make some tough decisions, and to step into the
life you're meant to live. Let's start by talking about
(01:27):
why values are so powerful. Research in psychology shows us
that living in alignment with our values is one of
the strongest predictors of life satisfaction and mental health. According
to a study published in the Journal of Positive Psychology,
individuals who consistently align their actions with their core values
report higher levels of happiness, resilience, and life satisfaction. Why
(01:53):
because when you live according to your values, you're not
just going through the motions. You're living with purpose. Every decision,
every relationship, every goal you pursue is grounded in something real,
something that feels right to you. So let's talk about
what it feels like to live out of alignment with
your values, because that's where a lot of us are
(02:15):
right now. Picture a time when you made a decision
that went against what you knew deep down was right
for you. Maybe it was a job you took for
the paycheck even though it drained you. Maybe it was
a relationship you stayed in because it was comfortable, even
though you knew it wasn't meant to last. Or maybe
it was a habit you couldn't shake even though it
(02:37):
went against the person you wanted to be. How did
that feel? Probably not good. There's a reason for that.
When you ignore your values, you're ignoring who you truly are.
You're saying my peace, my happiness, my integrity, none of
that matters. But it does matter. And living in a
way that honors your values isn't just about feeling good.
(03:00):
It's about building a life you're proud of, a life
that feels like it's truly yours. I want to tell
you about Jessica, a woman I worked with a few
years ago. Jessica was in her late thirties. Successful by
society standards. She had a stable job, a nice home,
and a busy social life. But when she came to me,
(03:22):
she was exhausted, burnt out, and feeling empty. She told me, Brandon,
I don't even recognize myself anymore. I feel like I'm
just going through the motions. As we talked, it became
clear that Jessica had been living a life built on
what everyone else wanted for her. Her parents wanted her
to be successful, so she'd gone into a high paying
(03:46):
career that didn't fulfill her. Her friends expected her to
be fun and social, so she was always putting others'
needs before her own. She was living for everyone but herself.
And the worst part, she didn't even know what she wanted.
She'd spent so long ignoring her values that she'd forgotten
who she really was. Now I want you to take
(04:09):
a moment to do the same thing Jessica did. Grab
a notebook, find a quiet place, and ask yourself this question.
What truly matters to me? What are the non negotiable
values that define who I am? Some of you might
already know your core values. For others, this might feel challenging,
especially if you spent years trying to live up to
(04:29):
other people's expectations. And that's okay. Start with the basics.
Think about times when you felt truly alive, when you
felt at peace. What values were you living by in
those moments? Was it honesty, creativity, connection, freedom, or maybe growth?
Write down whatever comes to mind. For Jessica, her core
(04:50):
values turned out to be authenticity, creativity, and compassion. Once
she knew that, everything changed, she started making choices that
aligned with those values. She pursued a creative career. She
was passionate about, started spending more time with people who
valued her for who she was, and let go of
relationships that drained her and the change and her energy,
(05:14):
her confidence, her happiness. It was like night and day.
There's a powerful piece of research by doctor Susan David,
a psychologist at Harvard Medical School and an expert on
emotional agility. She found that people who live by their
core values not only experience greater life satisfaction, but also
show higher levels of resilience when facing challenges. Doctor David
(05:38):
calls it emotional courage, the courage to face your emotions,
to confront what's hard, and to live by what matters
most to you. No matter what does this mean for you,
it means that when you live by your values, you're
not just building a life you love. You're also building
a foundation that can withstand life's toughest moment. Because values
(06:01):
give you something to hold on to. They remind you
of who you are no matter what's happening around you.
Let me tell you another story about a man named Amir.
Amir grew up in a family that valued tradition, stability,
and loyalty above all else. He was taught to do
what's expected to not rock the boat, and for years
(06:23):
he did just that. He worked in the family business,
stayed in a relationship that everyone approved of, and followed
the path he was supposed to follow. But a Meir
felt trapped, like he was living in someone else's life.
One day, after a difficult breakup, Amir started asking himself
what he truly wanted. He realized that his core values
(06:46):
were freedom, adventure, and self expression, values that were completely
different from the life he was living. And even though
it was hard, Amir made the decision to step away
from the family business, to travel and to pursue a
career in creative writing. His family didn't understand, and some
of them even disapproved, but Emir knew he was finally
(07:07):
living in alignment with who he was and the freedom
he felt was worth everything. Now it's your turn. Take
a look at the values you wrote down and ask yourself,
where in my life am I out of alignment with
these values? Are there relationships that don't align with your values?
Are their habits, routines, or choices that go against what
(07:29):
you truly believe? Write down any areas where you feel
disconnected from your core values. This might bring up some
uncomfortable truths. But that's okay. This is where growth happens.
This is where you start reclaiming your life. Let's talk
about something most people don't want to face the price
of compromising on your values. When you ignore your core values,
(07:53):
you're betraying yourself. And over time that betrayal adds up.
It turns into self doubt, low self esteem, anxiety, even depression,
and the worst part, you might not even realize that's
what's happening. Let me tell you about a client I
worked with named Naomi. Naomi was a kind hearted, deeply
(08:14):
empathetic person. Her core values were compassion, honesty, and justice,
but she was working in an environment where dishonesty was
part of the daily routine. She was asked to lie,
to manipulate, to do things that went against everything she
believed in, and every day she felt her self worth
(08:36):
crumble a little more. Naomi tried to brush it off,
to tell herself it was just a job, but eventually
it caught up with her. She started feeling anxious, angry,
even depressed, and when we finally sat down together, it
was clear why she was living in direct opposition to
(08:56):
her values. She was betraying herself every every day. Once
she recognized that she made the difficult choice to leave
her job, even though it meant a temporary loss of stability,
and the relief she felt it was profound, she was
finally free to live in a way that honored who
she was. Look at your list of values and ask yourself,
(09:22):
where have I compromised? Where have I allowed others to
cross lines I needed to protect? Write down the boundaries
you need to set to protect your values. These boundaries
might be with other people, with work, or even with yourself.
And let me tell you, setting boundaries isn't selfish, it's
self respect. It's choosing to honor who you are no
(09:46):
matter what. Living by your values takes courage. It means
saying no to what doesn't align, even when it's uncomfortable.
It means standing up for yourself, even if it means
standing alone, And most importantly, it means being willing to
face whatever comes with integrity, knowing that you're staying true
(10:06):
to yourself. In a study published in the Journal of
Counseling Psychology, researchers found that people who live authentically experience
greater well being, stronger relationships, and increased resilience. Authenticity isn't
about being perfect, It's about being real. It's about showing
(10:27):
up as you are, with all your values, all your truth,
and all your imperfections. For the next week, commit to
one action every day that reflects your core values. This
might be saying no to something that doesn't align, having
an honest conversation, or pursuing a goal that truly matters
(10:47):
to you. Write down each action you take, and at
the end of the week, reflect on how it feels
to live in alignment with who you are. So today
we've gone deep. We've uncovered your value values, looked at
where you're out of alignment, and talked about what it
means to live authentically. This work isn't easy, but it's powerful.
(11:09):
When you live by your values, you're building a life
that's true to you. You're creating a foundation of self
worth that no one can take away. If this episode
resonated with you, share it with someone who might need it.
You can find us on iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or
wherever you tune in. And thank you to our sponsor,
(11:30):
cerebra Ai, for creating tools that help you live with
purpose and integrity every day Until next time, keep pushing forward,
keep living with courage, and start thinking forward a life
that reflects the best of who you are. You deserve it.
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