March 23, 2025 • 38 mins
This week I'm guiding you through a practical framework called the Clarity Compass, designed to help you achieve clarity when you're at a career and life crossroads. We delve into the concept of internal misalignment that often hides behind external success, and I share my own experiences of feeling stuck in a seemingly perfect job. We'll conduct a values excavation, create an alignment matrix, and engage in a visualization exercise to help you align your future decisions with your true self. By the end of this episode, you'll have actionable steps to commit to one small change within the next 24 hours, making meaningful career transitions a reality. Join me in this journey toward clarity and alignment, and let's make moves together!
00:00 Introduction and Host Welcome
00:43 Understanding the Sunday Night Dread
03:51 The Clarity Compass Framework
05:31 Myth Busting: Finding True Clarity
06:07 Personal Story: The PR Job Realization
10:50 Values Exploration Exercise
16:49 Creating Your Alignment Matrix
22:59 Visualization Exercise for Future Clarity
27:59 Taking Action: The Next 24 Hours Rule
32:57 Final Thoughts and Homework
00:00 Introduction and Host Welcome
00:43 Understanding the Sunday Night Dread
03:51 The Clarity Compass Framework
05:31 Myth Busting: Finding True Clarity
06:07 Personal Story: The PR Job Realization
10:50 Values Exploration Exercise
16:49 Creating Your Alignment Matrix
22:59 Visualization Exercise for Future Clarity
27:59 Taking Action: The Next 24 Hours Rule
32:57 Final Thoughts and Homework
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
This is amazing media production. Hello there, most awesome one.
Welcome back to the Switch Briveter Quid podcast. I'm your
host Ayanna Angel, and today we're diving into something I
(00:22):
know many of you have had deep thoughts about. I
know I have, and it's about finding the clarity that
you desire when you're at that crossroads, trying to figure
out which way do I go? What do I do?
Do I have all the answers, where can I find them?
(00:44):
Some of us are all too familiar with what that
feeling is like on a Sunday night, when that time
rolls around and it's about eight o'clock. I mean for
some people it's even like first thing in the morning
on a Sunday. Instead of feeling like, oh, I'm excited
for the week ahead and feeling like you're just full
(01:05):
of this anticipation for the goodness that's gonna come in
the week ahead, instead you're filled with dread, anxiety. Even
sometimes for some of you, your job looks perfect on paper.
(01:26):
Maybe you have a good salary, maybe there's a very
prestigious or respectable title that you've worked so hard to get,
and maybe you even have a I guess what will
be equivalent to when they used to say corner office.
Maybe you actually have an office with a door. That's
(01:47):
a rarity now, especially in tech, it's all this community seating.
But nonetheless, you have a situation that other people may
potentially envy, a situation that you worked really hard to
create for yourself, something that you coveted at a point
(02:08):
in time, and maybe a situation that others are currently
in desire of having. But something feels off. I remember
the first dance I had with these feelings, and I
always wondered if I was the only one, like, am
(02:29):
I the only person feeling like this? Because at that time,
I didn't hear anyone else talking about it. It wasn't
a heavy part of conversation. If other people were feeling
like this, they were definitely doing a good job hiding
it and acting like they were excited or didn't have
negative feelings. Maybe let's say about whatever it was they
(02:53):
had to do on Monday morning. Now I've come to
realize that this feeling, though, it's a result of when
your external success masks internal misalignment. And you say that again,
this feeling is a result of when external success masks
(03:17):
internal misalignment. Now, don't get me wrong, there could have
been a time. In fact, there probably was a time
when these things were aligned for you, because there was
certainly a time where these things were aligned for me. However,
people change, We grow, our minds expand we get exposed
(03:38):
to new things, new ideas of ways of living life,
and as a result, sometimes what was good for us
then it's no longer the move, it's no longer something
we're feeling. So today I'm going to share a practical
framework to help you, which I call the clarity compass.
(03:59):
Get into it, clarity compass. This is the idea that
you are going to have some steps that you can
take that will assist you in moving from confusion to clarity.
That's when you're making these big career decisions, sometimes even
(04:20):
life decisions. Right, I think you can use this model
and plot different scenarios into what we're about to talk about,
and use it to kind of vet some of your
upcoming decision making as well. So by the end of
this episode, hopefully fingers crossed, if you stay with me,
(04:43):
and you are intentional and honest and open with doing
this exercise, you'll have a concrete process that you can use, right,
away to gain clarity on your next move. So first step,
this is the easy, get a pen and paper. I
want you to grab something right with. If you have
(05:05):
your computer in front of you, or if it's nearby,
maybe open up a document on your computer where you
can jot some things down. Doesn't have to be a
pen and paper, but just you just want to have
even if it's in your notes app right on your phone.
You just want to have a way to document and
follow along and write down the things that you're thinking
and that come up for you as we go through
(05:27):
this exercise. All right, let's get into it. I'm traditionally
not a myth buster type of woman. This is not
a myth busting type of show. I have to say
it's slow because myth busting can be a bit of
a tongue twister for me. But anyways, let's do a
(05:47):
little myth busting real quick. Just one and that is
that clarity doesn't come from these endless pros and cons
lists that you may have been making, or thinking that
you need to make, or waiting for this big dun
dun dun light bulb moment of inspiration. No, I remember
(06:07):
when I felt stuck in my sports PR job. Years ago.
I had this coveted position that many would have dreamed
of having. I was working in a high rise office
building on Fifth Avenue, New York City. I was going
to cool events, doing fun happy hours after work, handling
(06:29):
red carpets at All Star games, meeting cool people, working
with celebrities, sometimes even hanging out with them. So on paper,
it was perfect, It was ideal. It was what some
had dreamed of, not necessarily what I dreamed of, because
(06:49):
I didn't necessarily have a dream job. But it felt
pretty cool, especially in the beginning. But eventually I kept
feeling this nagging sense that something was missing. I started
asking myself, is this it? If this is it, why
don't I feel good about this? Being it? Was this
(07:13):
all my life had to offer? Was I capable of more?
What would more look like? So I made lists, took
long walks, sought out the counsel of others as we
do right, all while trying to analyze my way to clarity.
(07:33):
Should I stay, should I go? What would be the
perfect next move? What would be the perfect next job?
But that clarity did not come in the way that
I thought it would. The breakthrough actually came when I
started looking inward in a deeper way, when I really
(07:54):
started making an effort to get to know myself. This
idea of getting to know yourself is not something that
I feel like most of us are introduced to at
an early age. So it can feel a little confusing
really at times, because you're thinking, I know myself, I'm me,
(08:15):
I've been me all these years, but how many of
us actually take inventory of who me is and what
it means to be me. So when I began to
understand what I valued at my core, and you have
maybe heard me say this before, I had to look
(08:35):
up what values were when I first started toying with
this idea of what do I value? What are my values?
Because it wasn't a normal part of conversation that I
had been introduced to. So I really needed to get
clarity for myself on like what did values really look like?
And so what made me really dive into this was
(08:59):
that I knew that something felt off for me, and
I wanted to get clarity on what was feeling off.
So when I began to understand my values and what
I valued at my core, what made me feel like
alive and what kind of impact I wanted to have
(09:21):
and all of these different things that align with values.
That's when the path forward started to open itself up
to me. In my mind. It started to be revealed
in sort of a way. Although I should say that
the path that I had this revelation about, I'm not
(09:42):
saying that it was like super clear and like I
had this fully mapped out plan because I didn't. I
just had more insight than I had before. In my experience,
true clarity emerges when we align our decisions with our
(10:04):
core values and then trust our inner compass. It's about
uncovering what matters most to you, not what looks like
it matters, not what looks best to others. It's not
about the external, It's about the internal. So today I'm
(10:25):
gonna guide you through a three part process to help
you access your own inner wisdom and make decisions that
feel aligned with who you truly are. Hold on to
all that goodness you're feeling right now. We will be
right back after this quick break with more switch pavid
or quit talk. Welcome back, Okay. I hope you are
(10:51):
ready to really dig in because we're about to dive
into our first step, which is a values exploration or excavation,
however you want to look at it. It's drilling down
on these values. So the first step in finding clarity
is understanding what you're trying to align with your core values.
(11:12):
Your values are, you can think of them like your
internal guiding system, like a GPS. But many of us
have spent so many years following everyone else's GPS, everyone
else's mapping guidance on where we should be going, where
we should be headed, them telling us what skills we
(11:33):
have and why those skills should be used in that way,
this way, or whatever. Right, we've been so busy meeting
expectations and checking boxes that we lost touch with what
actually matters to us, or maybe what matters to us
has changed, and that's okay too. So now grab that pen,
(11:54):
the computer, whatever, because we're going to do an exercise
right now that I call memory mining. I want you
to think back to three moments in your professional life
when you've felt the most alive, the most yourself, the
most authentic, When you felt the most inflow, like you
(12:17):
could do this all day. Your guidance with what you
were doing was undisturbed. It was just effortless. In some ways.
Maybe it was leading a challenging project. Maybe it was
presenting a challenging project. Maybe it was mentoring a colleague
or solving some type of huge problem that no one
(12:41):
else could solve. Maybe it was something even simpler, like
doing a bit of research that netted out in something
that was valuable in a very need to know piece
of information. Whatever it is, Like I said, it doesn't
have to be a grand achievement. It just needs to
be you recognize those moments when you felt truly alive
(13:03):
and when you felt engaged and connected with what you
were doing. Pause this podcast episode if you need a
little bit more time to really think this through, because
I want you to really show up in this moment
for yourself and take the time to go back in
that memory bank and think about and write down those moments.
(13:25):
Don't just think about it and not them in your mind,
because I know I've done that before too. Somebody gives
me a direction and they're like, take the time and
think about it, and I'm like, Okay, i'll do it later,
but I'll just think about it right now, but i'll
write it down later. No, think about it right now,
and write it down right now. So if you need
to pause this episode. Do so now, Okay, you're back. Now.
(13:47):
For each moment, I want you to ask yourself what
specifically made this moment meaningful, What values were being honored
in this experience, What part of me felt the most
expressed in this moment. To keep your mind moving, I'm
(14:09):
going to give you example. When I reflect back on
my career, one of the most fulfilling moments wasn't when
I was handling pr at these major sporting events or
anything of that nature, or when I maybe got my
book deal with Simon and Schuster. Sure that was exciting
and whatnot. But the most fulfilling moments that I look
(14:33):
back on is like times where I was volunteering to
mentor college students and getting a chance to be in
direct conversation with them and share insights with them about
life after college and giving them just like practical advice
and things that I had learned and best practices, giving
(14:54):
them all the goodness that I know that they're going
to need in the future. That's when I felt like alive.
That's when I felt like I lit up. I also
felt like I had a connection with them and seeing
in their faces when what I was saying like clicked
and made sense, Like that kind of stuff fueled me.
(15:16):
When I dig into why that experience or those types
of experiences were self fulfilling to me, I can now
realize that it honored some of my core values of collaboration,
self expression, impact. These weren't values that I was consciously
aware of at the time, but they were driving my
(15:40):
fulfillment and when I look back on it, they were
things that were not present in my day to day work.
So I want you to look at your three moments.
What patterns do you see? What are the values that
keep showing up? I want you to circle the top
three values that feel most essential to you. These will
(16:05):
help to inform your personal clarity compass. And if you're
not really sure and need some ideation around values, do
a quick Google search and search for a list of
values or what are some of the top things that
people value or what are some of the top values
(16:25):
that people point to or that have been identified When
trying to get clarity on your career or when trying
to figure out what type of career direction you should choose.
I'm sure there will be some results that come up
that will get your mind thinking about what could work
for you and what some of your values might be
(16:48):
at this point in time. Now that we have identified
our values, we're going to jump into our alignment and
so we're going to do like an alignment matrix of sorts.
Now that you've identify those core values, is time to
evaluate your current situation where you are sitting right now
and the potential paths forward. Using this alignment matrix, You're
(17:13):
going to start with first drawing a simple grid on
a piece of paper or mapping out a table in
an Excel sheet or on a word doc or whatever
it is type of program that you're using. You know
how to put together a simple grid. It can have
two rows down the side, and then maybe three or
(17:34):
four columns at the top. What you're going to write
in this matrix. In one of the rows, you're going
to write what your current role is, and the next
row you're going to write one or two potential alternatives
that you're considering things that you might be interested in doing.
Now at the top in the columns, I want you
(17:55):
to write out at least minimum three of your value
use across the top right out three of your values. Now,
what you're going to do is you're going to score
each option from one to five on how well it
(18:16):
aligns with each of your core values. So remember your
options were on the left hand side in the rows
and your values are on the top in the columns.
What you want to do now is you want to
score from one to five. As you're going down and
you're looking at the grid and you're seeing your current role. Okay, well,
(18:40):
how well does it align with my creativity. Let's say
one means that it doesn't align very well at all,
there's almost no alignment. Five means it's perfect, there's a
high amount of alignment. So for example, let's say your
(19:02):
top values are creativity, maybe autonomy, and impact. Your current
role could be something like marketing. Right, so your current
role is marketing. Then where would you score creativity? Maybe
you score creativity at a two, autonomy at a three, impact,
(19:29):
maybe at like a four. Now you think about what
those alternative ideas that you're considering. It could be a role,
it could be a complete shift to a new industry,
whatever it is. When you're looking at what one of
those potential alternatives could be, how would you score those
(19:51):
in the three areas of creativity, autonomy, and impact. Maybe
you were considering more into a freelance marketing role. Right
through that lens, maybe you would score creativity at a five,
autonomy at a five, impact at a three, whatever it is.
(20:15):
Just get to scoring. Now that you've done the scoring,
I want you to add up those scores. But here's
the crucial part. Pay attention to your gut reaction to
these numbers. When you see that your current role scores
low on creativity, how does that make you feel? Does
(20:40):
it make you feel validated? Does it make you feel terrified?
Does it make you feel relieved? Pay attention to your
emotional responses. Those emotional responses are giving you subtle glimpses
into your reality. It's giving you insight. It's important data
(21:03):
that you can use moving forward. I remember when I
realized that my PR job scored low in the areas
of some of the things that I valued, like autonomy
and self expression. And when I say scored low, it
wasn't because I had done this matrix at the time.
(21:25):
It was more so because I had done the digging
and the excavating of myself to uncover some of these answers.
I'm giving you a cheat code, right, an easy way
to do this versus how I did it through just
really trudging through a bunch of gunk to figure this out.
(21:46):
But when I realized that there was no self expression,
there was no alignment with how I wanted to show
up as a creative and have autonomy, that helped me
to have the clarity that this role I was in
was never going to offer me these things, and that
was crucial for me to understand. So with this matrix,
(22:11):
if you realize that some of the things you value
are not in alignment with your current role, you may
feel a mix of validation, like ah, so that's why
I've been feeling this way, But you may also experience
a bit of fear because then you're asking yourself, but
(22:33):
what does this mean? What do I do? Now? I
got you, I get that feeling. I understand it. And
so now what we're gonna do is think about our
future selves in relation to what we have uncovered. Hold
on to all that goodness you're feeling right now. We
will be right back after this quick break with more
switch pivot or quick talk. Now we're going to move
(23:00):
into this next part, which is all about visualization. It's
gonna help us to go from analyzing to really feeling
into our internal wisdom. This is where I am inviting
you to pause and try this visualization exercise. I'm gonna
(23:21):
ask you to close your eyes. So I want you
to imagine yourself six months from now, maybe even a
year from now. You've chosen to stay in your current path,
going where you've been headed already. How does your body feel?
(23:43):
Is it tense? Is it relaxed? Is it relieved? Is
it tight? Is it loose? How does your body feel
when you visualize your future self having stayed in your
current path? What's your energy level like? What are you
(24:08):
excited about? What are you dreading? Give yourself a moment
to visualize and to feel into those things. So how
does your body feel? What's your energy like? What are
you excited about? What are you dreading? If you were
(24:30):
to stay in the same position, current path that you
are on right now now, I want you to imagine
choosing a different path run through the same questions. If
I were to choose a different path, maybe one of
those paths that I listed in the alignment matrix, how
(24:55):
would my body feel? What would my energy be like?
What would I be excited about? What would I be dreading?
A year from now if I chose a different path.
Your body often knows the truth before your mind has
(25:20):
the time to catch up. When I was contemplating leaving
New York and leaving my publicity career, my visualization of
staying where I was, ooh, it felt heavy. When I
thought about being in that same position a year from then,
(25:42):
it felt heavy, It felt stifling. I had a visceral
reaction that said, I can't be here a year from now.
But when I visualized making a change and I didn't
have full clarity on what that was gonna look like, right,
(26:04):
even though I had all these uncertainties, I felt a lightness.
I felt a freedom, and that freedom is something that
I have come to realize. I truly value this experience
of visualization and really paying attention to how your body feels.
(26:26):
This is what I call owning your truth. As I've
discovered on my own journey, the first fundamental truth of
making a change in your life is owning your truth,
being honest with yourself. Honesty isn't always easy, though, especially
when it comes to what you thought you knew or
(26:48):
who you thought you were. Now we're getting to the
end of our exercise, not quite yet. But we're nearing
the end, and I want to talk a bit about action.
If you know me and you know anything about me,
about that action, because clarity without action is just you wishing,
it's wishful thinking. But let me be clear, though, clear
(27:09):
with you about my clarity about action. Just kidding, no,
but really, let me be clear. Action doesn't mean immediately
quitting your job or making a dramatic, unsustainable change. Just
because you've had some realizations, possibly through doing this exercise,
(27:30):
which I hope is true, it doesn't mean that your
action that you have to take is an action that
will be detrimental to you in this specific, immediate moment.
Right This exercise has been designed to get you thinking,
to give you some tools to make you realize that
(27:52):
you have options, but it's not to put you in
a bad situation. So now with the action, this is
where I want to talk to you about what we
can call maybe the next twenty four hours rule. This
is about commitment. You committing to one small action that
(28:14):
you can take in the next twenty four hours that
moves you toward alignment, the alignment that you now know
to be true with you, your person, yourself, and what
you are doing in your day to day. Some examples
of action that you can take maybe things like scheduling
(28:35):
a coffee day virtual or in person with someone in
a field that you're considering or that you're curious about.
It could be signing up for a class that helps
you develop a skill with regard to a path that
you're interested in. It could be blocking out maybe thirty
(28:55):
minutes an hour to work on a side project, also
so deciding how much time you want to block out
each week to do that. Another example for taking action
could be putting together a quick email for an informal
interview request or maybe a potential mentor request. These things
(29:19):
don't have to be groundbreaking, big action, They just need
to be you showing yourself that you're committed to yourself
in this way that you will take action instead of
just sitting on whatever revelations you have now come to.
The key with these actions is going to be being
(29:42):
specific about what the action is and also making it
something doable, not something so far fetched that you dread
even trying to think about tackling this action. Because analysis
paralysis is real and it is one of the enemies
to the clarity that we seek when I decided that
(30:02):
I wanted to become a traditionally published author. I didn't
just quit my job immediately. Like I said, it's not
about those irrational quick actions, It's about being calculated. So
I took small, intentional steps. I signed up for weekend
writing workshops. I started writing during my nights. On my weekend,
(30:27):
I read articles and I perused books on publishing. I
stopped into bookstores to do a little recon on people
that were in the same genres as me, or even
just how bookstores were set up and what they were highlighting.
I just took the small steps that I could that
(30:50):
were within my reach to help me build some momentum
and also to help me gain some clarity throughout my
journey of making my own switch, pivot or quit. What
I have found to be true is that when you
decide that you want to make a switch, pivot or quit,
(31:11):
what you're really saying is I want to change, but
I do want to acknowledge that change is not always
easy to approach. I can admit that the thought of
change or mixing up what you've known and welcoming in
this plot twist, that can be intimidating. It can be scary,
(31:35):
but you have to ask yourself how bad do I
want it? How bad do I desire this change? How
bad do I not want to be in this same
position next year? Making decisions aligned with your values? It
often requires courage. I'll be honest with you. It's not
(31:57):
for the faint of heart. It means potentially disappointing others
facing the uncertainty as we talked about, or maybe even
letting go of this carefully constructed, curated idea of who
you were going to be as a professional. Everyone who
(32:21):
has ever made a meaningful career transition has felt this fear,
I guarantee it. The difference is, though, they learn to
see the fear not as a stop sign or a hindrance,
but more as a signal that maybe I'm moving in
the right direction. So I encourage you to try your
(32:46):
best to think of it the same way, not as
a stop sign. Don't let the fear stop you. Look
at it as a green light. It's your signal to go. So,
as we wrap up, I want to leave you with
a few final thoughts. One is support. Building a support
(33:07):
system that is going to be a key element of
you welcoming in transition change. Is easier when you have
people supporting you, and when you have a community around
you that is like minded in wanting to grow and
try new things and not be stuck and stagnant. I
(33:29):
can't emphasize that enough. The next thing I want to
share is that you don't have to have it all
figure it out to take the next step. Clarity emerges
through your action, not through your analysis. Okay, the third
thing I want to share with you is that you
have to trust that you have the wisdom within you
(33:50):
to make good decisions and aligned decisions. You won't have
all the answers. No, you will not, but eventually the
will continue to reveal themselves to you. And as you
are allowing those answers to be revealed to you, give
yourself permission to explore. And finally, I want you to
(34:15):
remember that your success in life depends on your dedication
to you. Nobody else's dedication to you, your dedication to you.
Only you can make the biggest impact to achieve the
amazing things that you desire. You can either take control
and bet on yourself, or you can take a chance
(34:35):
and sit by hoping that life goes your way. Good
luck with that. Now, this is your homework for this week.
I want you to complete the values excavation exercise if
you did not already do it, if you needed to
pause or what have you, and you didn't have time
or the space, or you want it in the right
place to write down the things that you needed to
(34:57):
write down. Come back to this episode. If you listen
to that part, complete the values Excavation exercise. Second thing
I want you to do is create your alignment matrix
if you didn't already do that. And then the third
thing I want you to do is commit to one
small action in the next twenty four hours. I know
(35:18):
it is a Sunday for some of you who are
listening right when this episode airs, but twenty four hours
from now is Monday, So Monday morning. If it's sending
that email that should be drafted, scheduled to send, waiting
to just hit that person's inbox, whatever it is, you
got twenty four hours, I want you to commit to
(35:40):
one small action in the next twenty four hours. All right,
I'm done, But in the coming weeks, I want to
hear your stories. If you've used any of these action
items from this framework, I want you to reach out
to me if it's helped you to make some aligned decisions,
let me know, hit me up via email or DM
(36:04):
me on Instagram Ayana dot Angel, because I want to
hear your stories and I want to know that you're
making moves right. And if you found value in today's episode,
I would be grateful if you were to share it
with somebody who you think is in a similar situation
or maybe has been toying with ideas of making some
(36:27):
type of change, share this episode with them. Sharing is caring, right,
And if you've found value in this episode, please please
please let me know. Drop me a DM on Instagram
once again, or you can leave me a review on
Apple podcast. That is always helpful and just me being
(36:48):
able to see and know how these episodes are impacting you.
So do one of those things, and don't let any
of this that I've shared with you over you, because
the end of the day, if you take it in
small chunks and steps, even if you need to do
some of the exercises required of you in this episode
(37:09):
over the course of a couple different days, that's fine too.
Don't overwhelm yourself. All right, Thank you so much for
spending time with me today. It is always a pleasure.
I value your time and the time that you share
with me because I know you don't have to. I
hope that I will get to hang out with you
next week, and I hope that you have a wonderful
(37:31):
week ahead of you, wonderful days ahead of you, and
as always be well. Mazie Media as a woman led
podcast production company that works with small businesses and corporations.
Visit mazimedia dot com for more details on how you
and your organization can go from ideation to podcasting anything
This is amazing media production. Hello there, most awesome one.
Welcome back to the Switch Briveter Quid podcast. I'm your
host Ayanna Angel, and today we're diving into something I
(00:22):
know many of you have had deep thoughts about. I
know I have, and it's about finding the clarity that
you desire when you're at that crossroads, trying to figure
out which way do I go? What do I do?
Do I have all the answers, where can I find them?
(00:44):
Some of us are all too familiar with what that
feeling is like on a Sunday night, when that time
rolls around and it's about eight o'clock. I mean for
some people it's even like first thing in the morning
on a Sunday. Instead of feeling like, oh, I'm excited
for the week ahead and feeling like you're just full
(01:05):
of this anticipation for the goodness that's gonna come in
the week ahead, instead you're filled with dread, anxiety. Even
sometimes for some of you, your job looks perfect on paper.
(01:26):
Maybe you have a good salary, maybe there's a very
prestigious or respectable title that you've worked so hard to get,
and maybe you even have a I guess what will
be equivalent to when they used to say corner office.
Maybe you actually have an office with a door. That's
(01:47):
a rarity now, especially in tech, it's all this community seating.
But nonetheless, you have a situation that other people may
potentially envy, a situation that you worked really hard to
create for yourself, something that you coveted at a point
(02:08):
in time, and maybe a situation that others are currently
in desire of having. But something feels off. I remember
the first dance I had with these feelings, and I
always wondered if I was the only one, like, am
(02:29):
I the only person feeling like this? Because at that time,
I didn't hear anyone else talking about it. It wasn't
a heavy part of conversation. If other people were feeling
like this, they were definitely doing a good job hiding
it and acting like they were excited or didn't have
negative feelings. Maybe let's say about whatever it was they
(02:53):
had to do on Monday morning. Now I've come to
realize that this feeling, though, it's a result of when
your external success masks internal misalignment. And you say that again,
this feeling is a result of when external success masks
(03:17):
internal misalignment. Now, don't get me wrong, there could have
been a time. In fact, there probably was a time
when these things were aligned for you, because there was
certainly a time where these things were aligned for me. However,
people change, We grow, our minds expand we get exposed
(03:38):
to new things, new ideas of ways of living life,
and as a result, sometimes what was good for us
then it's no longer the move, it's no longer something
we're feeling. So today I'm going to share a practical
framework to help you, which I call the clarity compass.
(03:59):
Get into it, clarity compass. This is the idea that
you are going to have some steps that you can
take that will assist you in moving from confusion to clarity.
That's when you're making these big career decisions, sometimes even
(04:20):
life decisions. Right, I think you can use this model
and plot different scenarios into what we're about to talk about,
and use it to kind of vet some of your
upcoming decision making as well. So by the end of
this episode, hopefully fingers crossed, if you stay with me,
(04:43):
and you are intentional and honest and open with doing
this exercise, you'll have a concrete process that you can use, right,
away to gain clarity on your next move. So first step,
this is the easy, get a pen and paper. I
want you to grab something right with. If you have
(05:05):
your computer in front of you, or if it's nearby,
maybe open up a document on your computer where you
can jot some things down. Doesn't have to be a
pen and paper, but just you just want to have
even if it's in your notes app right on your phone.
You just want to have a way to document and
follow along and write down the things that you're thinking
and that come up for you as we go through
(05:27):
this exercise. All right, let's get into it. I'm traditionally
not a myth buster type of woman. This is not
a myth busting type of show. I have to say
it's slow because myth busting can be a bit of
a tongue twister for me. But anyways, let's do a
(05:47):
little myth busting real quick. Just one and that is
that clarity doesn't come from these endless pros and cons
lists that you may have been making, or thinking that
you need to make, or waiting for this big dun
dun dun light bulb moment of inspiration. No, I remember
(06:07):
when I felt stuck in my sports PR job. Years ago.
I had this coveted position that many would have dreamed
of having. I was working in a high rise office
building on Fifth Avenue, New York City. I was going
to cool events, doing fun happy hours after work, handling
(06:29):
red carpets at All Star games, meeting cool people, working
with celebrities, sometimes even hanging out with them. So on paper,
it was perfect, It was ideal. It was what some
had dreamed of, not necessarily what I dreamed of, because
(06:49):
I didn't necessarily have a dream job. But it felt
pretty cool, especially in the beginning. But eventually I kept
feeling this nagging sense that something was missing. I started
asking myself, is this it? If this is it, why
don't I feel good about this? Being it? Was this
(07:13):
all my life had to offer? Was I capable of more?
What would more look like? So I made lists, took
long walks, sought out the counsel of others as we
do right, all while trying to analyze my way to clarity.
(07:33):
Should I stay, should I go? What would be the
perfect next move? What would be the perfect next job?
But that clarity did not come in the way that
I thought it would. The breakthrough actually came when I
started looking inward in a deeper way, when I really
(07:54):
started making an effort to get to know myself. This
idea of getting to know yourself is not something that
I feel like most of us are introduced to at
an early age. So it can feel a little confusing
really at times, because you're thinking, I know myself, I'm me,
(08:15):
I've been me all these years, but how many of
us actually take inventory of who me is and what
it means to be me. So when I began to
understand what I valued at my core, and you have
maybe heard me say this before, I had to look
(08:35):
up what values were when I first started toying with
this idea of what do I value? What are my values?
Because it wasn't a normal part of conversation that I
had been introduced to. So I really needed to get
clarity for myself on like what did values really look like?
And so what made me really dive into this was
(08:59):
that I knew that something felt off for me, and
I wanted to get clarity on what was feeling off.
So when I began to understand my values and what
I valued at my core, what made me feel like
alive and what kind of impact I wanted to have
(09:21):
and all of these different things that align with values.
That's when the path forward started to open itself up
to me. In my mind. It started to be revealed
in sort of a way. Although I should say that
the path that I had this revelation about, I'm not
(09:42):
saying that it was like super clear and like I
had this fully mapped out plan because I didn't. I
just had more insight than I had before. In my experience,
true clarity emerges when we align our decisions with our
(10:04):
core values and then trust our inner compass. It's about
uncovering what matters most to you, not what looks like
it matters, not what looks best to others. It's not
about the external, It's about the internal. So today I'm
(10:25):
gonna guide you through a three part process to help
you access your own inner wisdom and make decisions that
feel aligned with who you truly are. Hold on to
all that goodness you're feeling right now. We will be
right back after this quick break with more switch pavid
or quit talk. Welcome back, Okay. I hope you are
(10:51):
ready to really dig in because we're about to dive
into our first step, which is a values exploration or excavation,
however you want to look at it. It's drilling down
on these values. So the first step in finding clarity
is understanding what you're trying to align with your core values.
(11:12):
Your values are, you can think of them like your
internal guiding system, like a GPS. But many of us
have spent so many years following everyone else's GPS, everyone
else's mapping guidance on where we should be going, where
we should be headed, them telling us what skills we
(11:33):
have and why those skills should be used in that way,
this way, or whatever. Right, we've been so busy meeting
expectations and checking boxes that we lost touch with what
actually matters to us, or maybe what matters to us
has changed, and that's okay too. So now grab that pen,
(11:54):
the computer, whatever, because we're going to do an exercise
right now that I call memory mining. I want you
to think back to three moments in your professional life
when you've felt the most alive, the most yourself, the
most authentic, When you felt the most inflow, like you
(12:17):
could do this all day. Your guidance with what you
were doing was undisturbed. It was just effortless. In some ways.
Maybe it was leading a challenging project. Maybe it was
presenting a challenging project. Maybe it was mentoring a colleague
or solving some type of huge problem that no one
(12:41):
else could solve. Maybe it was something even simpler, like
doing a bit of research that netted out in something
that was valuable in a very need to know piece
of information. Whatever it is, Like I said, it doesn't
have to be a grand achievement. It just needs to
be you recognize those moments when you felt truly alive
(13:03):
and when you felt engaged and connected with what you
were doing. Pause this podcast episode if you need a
little bit more time to really think this through, because
I want you to really show up in this moment
for yourself and take the time to go back in
that memory bank and think about and write down those moments.
(13:25):
Don't just think about it and not them in your mind,
because I know I've done that before too. Somebody gives
me a direction and they're like, take the time and
think about it, and I'm like, Okay, i'll do it later,
but I'll just think about it right now, but i'll
write it down later. No, think about it right now,
and write it down right now. So if you need
to pause this episode. Do so now, Okay, you're back. Now.
(13:47):
For each moment, I want you to ask yourself what
specifically made this moment meaningful, What values were being honored
in this experience, What part of me felt the most
expressed in this moment. To keep your mind moving, I'm
(14:09):
going to give you example. When I reflect back on
my career, one of the most fulfilling moments wasn't when
I was handling pr at these major sporting events or
anything of that nature, or when I maybe got my
book deal with Simon and Schuster. Sure that was exciting
and whatnot. But the most fulfilling moments that I look
(14:33):
back on is like times where I was volunteering to
mentor college students and getting a chance to be in
direct conversation with them and share insights with them about
life after college and giving them just like practical advice
and things that I had learned and best practices, giving
(14:54):
them all the goodness that I know that they're going
to need in the future. That's when I felt like alive.
That's when I felt like I lit up. I also
felt like I had a connection with them and seeing
in their faces when what I was saying like clicked
and made sense, Like that kind of stuff fueled me.
(15:16):
When I dig into why that experience or those types
of experiences were self fulfilling to me, I can now
realize that it honored some of my core values of collaboration,
self expression, impact. These weren't values that I was consciously
aware of at the time, but they were driving my
(15:40):
fulfillment and when I look back on it, they were
things that were not present in my day to day work.
So I want you to look at your three moments.
What patterns do you see? What are the values that
keep showing up? I want you to circle the top
three values that feel most essential to you. These will
(16:05):
help to inform your personal clarity compass. And if you're
not really sure and need some ideation around values, do
a quick Google search and search for a list of
values or what are some of the top things that
people value or what are some of the top values
(16:25):
that people point to or that have been identified When
trying to get clarity on your career or when trying
to figure out what type of career direction you should choose.
I'm sure there will be some results that come up
that will get your mind thinking about what could work
for you and what some of your values might be
(16:48):
at this point in time. Now that we have identified
our values, we're going to jump into our alignment and
so we're going to do like an alignment matrix of sorts.
Now that you've identify those core values, is time to
evaluate your current situation where you are sitting right now
and the potential paths forward. Using this alignment matrix, You're
(17:13):
going to start with first drawing a simple grid on
a piece of paper or mapping out a table in
an Excel sheet or on a word doc or whatever
it is type of program that you're using. You know
how to put together a simple grid. It can have
two rows down the side, and then maybe three or
(17:34):
four columns at the top. What you're going to write
in this matrix. In one of the rows, you're going
to write what your current role is, and the next
row you're going to write one or two potential alternatives
that you're considering things that you might be interested in doing.
Now at the top in the columns, I want you
(17:55):
to write out at least minimum three of your value
use across the top right out three of your values. Now,
what you're going to do is you're going to score
each option from one to five on how well it
(18:16):
aligns with each of your core values. So remember your
options were on the left hand side in the rows
and your values are on the top in the columns.
What you want to do now is you want to
score from one to five. As you're going down and
you're looking at the grid and you're seeing your current role. Okay, well,
(18:40):
how well does it align with my creativity. Let's say
one means that it doesn't align very well at all,
there's almost no alignment. Five means it's perfect, there's a
high amount of alignment. So for example, let's say your
(19:02):
top values are creativity, maybe autonomy, and impact. Your current
role could be something like marketing. Right, so your current
role is marketing. Then where would you score creativity? Maybe
you score creativity at a two, autonomy at a three, impact,
(19:29):
maybe at like a four. Now you think about what
those alternative ideas that you're considering. It could be a role,
it could be a complete shift to a new industry,
whatever it is. When you're looking at what one of
those potential alternatives could be, how would you score those
(19:51):
in the three areas of creativity, autonomy, and impact. Maybe
you were considering more into a freelance marketing role. Right
through that lens, maybe you would score creativity at a five,
autonomy at a five, impact at a three, whatever it is.
(20:15):
Just get to scoring. Now that you've done the scoring,
I want you to add up those scores. But here's
the crucial part. Pay attention to your gut reaction to
these numbers. When you see that your current role scores
low on creativity, how does that make you feel? Does
(20:40):
it make you feel validated? Does it make you feel terrified?
Does it make you feel relieved? Pay attention to your
emotional responses. Those emotional responses are giving you subtle glimpses
into your reality. It's giving you insight. It's important data
(21:03):
that you can use moving forward. I remember when I
realized that my PR job scored low in the areas
of some of the things that I valued, like autonomy
and self expression. And when I say scored low, it
wasn't because I had done this matrix at the time.
(21:25):
It was more so because I had done the digging
and the excavating of myself to uncover some of these answers.
I'm giving you a cheat code, right, an easy way
to do this versus how I did it through just
really trudging through a bunch of gunk to figure this out.
(21:46):
But when I realized that there was no self expression,
there was no alignment with how I wanted to show
up as a creative and have autonomy, that helped me
to have the clarity that this role I was in
was never going to offer me these things, and that
was crucial for me to understand. So with this matrix,
(22:11):
if you realize that some of the things you value
are not in alignment with your current role, you may
feel a mix of validation, like ah, so that's why
I've been feeling this way, But you may also experience
a bit of fear because then you're asking yourself, but
(22:33):
what does this mean? What do I do? Now? I
got you, I get that feeling. I understand it. And
so now what we're gonna do is think about our
future selves in relation to what we have uncovered. Hold
on to all that goodness you're feeling right now. We
will be right back after this quick break with more
switch pivot or quick talk. Now we're going to move
(23:00):
into this next part, which is all about visualization. It's
gonna help us to go from analyzing to really feeling
into our internal wisdom. This is where I am inviting
you to pause and try this visualization exercise. I'm gonna
(23:21):
ask you to close your eyes. So I want you
to imagine yourself six months from now, maybe even a
year from now. You've chosen to stay in your current path,
going where you've been headed already. How does your body feel?
(23:43):
Is it tense? Is it relaxed? Is it relieved? Is
it tight? Is it loose? How does your body feel
when you visualize your future self having stayed in your
current path? What's your energy level like? What are you
(24:08):
excited about? What are you dreading? Give yourself a moment
to visualize and to feel into those things. So how
does your body feel? What's your energy like? What are
you excited about? What are you dreading? If you were
(24:30):
to stay in the same position, current path that you
are on right now now, I want you to imagine
choosing a different path run through the same questions. If
I were to choose a different path, maybe one of
those paths that I listed in the alignment matrix, how
(24:55):
would my body feel? What would my energy be like?
What would I be excited about? What would I be dreading?
A year from now if I chose a different path.
Your body often knows the truth before your mind has
(25:20):
the time to catch up. When I was contemplating leaving
New York and leaving my publicity career, my visualization of
staying where I was, ooh, it felt heavy. When I
thought about being in that same position a year from then,
(25:42):
it felt heavy, It felt stifling. I had a visceral
reaction that said, I can't be here a year from now.
But when I visualized making a change and I didn't
have full clarity on what that was gonna look like, right,
(26:04):
even though I had all these uncertainties, I felt a lightness.
I felt a freedom, and that freedom is something that
I have come to realize. I truly value this experience
of visualization and really paying attention to how your body feels.
(26:26):
This is what I call owning your truth. As I've
discovered on my own journey, the first fundamental truth of
making a change in your life is owning your truth,
being honest with yourself. Honesty isn't always easy, though, especially
when it comes to what you thought you knew or
(26:48):
who you thought you were. Now we're getting to the
end of our exercise, not quite yet. But we're nearing
the end, and I want to talk a bit about action.
If you know me and you know anything about me,
about that action, because clarity without action is just you wishing,
it's wishful thinking. But let me be clear, though, clear
(27:09):
with you about my clarity about action. Just kidding, no,
but really, let me be clear. Action doesn't mean immediately
quitting your job or making a dramatic, unsustainable change. Just
because you've had some realizations, possibly through doing this exercise,
(27:30):
which I hope is true, it doesn't mean that your
action that you have to take is an action that
will be detrimental to you in this specific, immediate moment.
Right This exercise has been designed to get you thinking,
to give you some tools to make you realize that
(27:52):
you have options, but it's not to put you in
a bad situation. So now with the action, this is
where I want to talk to you about what we
can call maybe the next twenty four hours rule. This
is about commitment. You committing to one small action that
(28:14):
you can take in the next twenty four hours that
moves you toward alignment, the alignment that you now know
to be true with you, your person, yourself, and what
you are doing in your day to day. Some examples
of action that you can take maybe things like scheduling
(28:35):
a coffee day virtual or in person with someone in
a field that you're considering or that you're curious about.
It could be signing up for a class that helps
you develop a skill with regard to a path that
you're interested in. It could be blocking out maybe thirty
(28:55):
minutes an hour to work on a side project, also
so deciding how much time you want to block out
each week to do that. Another example for taking action
could be putting together a quick email for an informal
interview request or maybe a potential mentor request. These things
(29:19):
don't have to be groundbreaking, big action, They just need
to be you showing yourself that you're committed to yourself
in this way that you will take action instead of
just sitting on whatever revelations you have now come to.
The key with these actions is going to be being
(29:42):
specific about what the action is and also making it
something doable, not something so far fetched that you dread
even trying to think about tackling this action. Because analysis
paralysis is real and it is one of the enemies
to the clarity that we seek when I decided that
(30:02):
I wanted to become a traditionally published author. I didn't
just quit my job immediately. Like I said, it's not
about those irrational quick actions, It's about being calculated. So
I took small, intentional steps. I signed up for weekend
writing workshops. I started writing during my nights. On my weekend,
(30:27):
I read articles and I perused books on publishing. I
stopped into bookstores to do a little recon on people
that were in the same genres as me, or even
just how bookstores were set up and what they were highlighting.
I just took the small steps that I could that
(30:50):
were within my reach to help me build some momentum
and also to help me gain some clarity throughout my
journey of making my own switch, pivot or quit. What
I have found to be true is that when you
decide that you want to make a switch, pivot or quit,
(31:11):
what you're really saying is I want to change, but
I do want to acknowledge that change is not always
easy to approach. I can admit that the thought of
change or mixing up what you've known and welcoming in
this plot twist, that can be intimidating. It can be scary,
(31:35):
but you have to ask yourself how bad do I
want it? How bad do I desire this change? How
bad do I not want to be in this same
position next year? Making decisions aligned with your values? It
often requires courage. I'll be honest with you. It's not
(31:57):
for the faint of heart. It means potentially disappointing others
facing the uncertainty as we talked about, or maybe even
letting go of this carefully constructed, curated idea of who
you were going to be as a professional. Everyone who
(32:21):
has ever made a meaningful career transition has felt this fear,
I guarantee it. The difference is, though, they learn to
see the fear not as a stop sign or a hindrance,
but more as a signal that maybe I'm moving in
the right direction. So I encourage you to try your
(32:46):
best to think of it the same way, not as
a stop sign. Don't let the fear stop you. Look
at it as a green light. It's your signal to go. So,
as we wrap up, I want to leave you with
a few final thoughts. One is support. Building a support
(33:07):
system that is going to be a key element of
you welcoming in transition change. Is easier when you have
people supporting you, and when you have a community around
you that is like minded in wanting to grow and
try new things and not be stuck and stagnant. I
(33:29):
can't emphasize that enough. The next thing I want to
share is that you don't have to have it all
figure it out to take the next step. Clarity emerges
through your action, not through your analysis. Okay, the third
thing I want to share with you is that you
have to trust that you have the wisdom within you
(33:50):
to make good decisions and aligned decisions. You won't have
all the answers. No, you will not, but eventually the
will continue to reveal themselves to you. And as you
are allowing those answers to be revealed to you, give
yourself permission to explore. And finally, I want you to
(34:15):
remember that your success in life depends on your dedication
to you. Nobody else's dedication to you, your dedication to you.
Only you can make the biggest impact to achieve the
amazing things that you desire. You can either take control
and bet on yourself, or you can take a chance
(34:35):
and sit by hoping that life goes your way. Good
luck with that. Now, this is your homework for this week.
I want you to complete the values excavation exercise if
you did not already do it, if you needed to
pause or what have you, and you didn't have time
or the space, or you want it in the right
place to write down the things that you needed to
(34:57):
write down. Come back to this episode. If you listen
to that part, complete the values Excavation exercise. Second thing
I want you to do is create your alignment matrix
if you didn't already do that. And then the third
thing I want you to do is commit to one
small action in the next twenty four hours. I know
(35:18):
it is a Sunday for some of you who are
listening right when this episode airs, but twenty four hours
from now is Monday, So Monday morning. If it's sending
that email that should be drafted, scheduled to send, waiting
to just hit that person's inbox, whatever it is, you
got twenty four hours, I want you to commit to
(35:40):
one small action in the next twenty four hours. All right,
I'm done, But in the coming weeks, I want to
hear your stories. If you've used any of these action
items from this framework, I want you to reach out
to me if it's helped you to make some aligned decisions,
let me know, hit me up via email or DM
(36:04):
me on Instagram Ayana dot Angel, because I want to
hear your stories and I want to know that you're
making moves right. And if you found value in today's episode,
I would be grateful if you were to share it
with somebody who you think is in a similar situation
or maybe has been toying with ideas of making some
(36:27):
type of change, share this episode with them. Sharing is caring, right,
And if you've found value in this episode, please please
please let me know. Drop me a DM on Instagram
once again, or you can leave me a review on
Apple podcast. That is always helpful and just me being
(36:48):
able to see and know how these episodes are impacting you.
So do one of those things, and don't let any
of this that I've shared with you over you, because
the end of the day, if you take it in
small chunks and steps, even if you need to do
some of the exercises required of you in this episode
(37:09):
over the course of a couple different days, that's fine too.
Don't overwhelm yourself. All right, Thank you so much for
spending time with me today. It is always a pleasure.
I value your time and the time that you share
with me because I know you don't have to. I
hope that I will get to hang out with you
next week, and I hope that you have a wonderful
(37:31):
week ahead of you, wonderful days ahead of you, and
as always be well. Mazie Media as a woman led
podcast production company that works with small businesses and corporations.
Visit mazimedia dot com for more details on how you
and your organization can go from ideation to podcasting anything
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