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July 3, 2025 10 mins
Comedians Mark Bailey and Mike Miller talk funny about prison reality TV shows and how it can get you killed, how prisoners have nothing but time to gossip, and the hit vintage video faces of death.  Brought to you by Nagoyaradio.comNagoyacomedy.com, and stand up comic Mark Bailey.

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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
It's Talk Funny, a podcast by Mark Dailey and other
comics from all over. We ended up in Japan because
we wondered if anyone in Asia I was named Gene
because no Indonesia says Hi Gene.

Speaker 2 (00:12):
Ever.

Speaker 1 (00:13):
The Talk Funny podcast from Nagoia Avo Dot Comic, Nagolia Comedy,
Jeers Monk Daily.

Speaker 3 (00:20):
Mark Bailey, Mike Muller Talk Funny wanted to bring up
the series that I've been watching on YouTube before I forgot.
It's called sixty Days In. It's on A and E,
but it's on YouTube, which is how we get it.
We're comics. We can't afford cable, No, can't afford plus.

Speaker 4 (00:34):
You gotta have twenty different streaming services these days.

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Yeah, we don't have HBO plus. We have HBO minus. Right,
we have YouTube minus.

Speaker 2 (00:43):
YouTube minus. That's what I have.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
Yeah, YouTube free. It's like, hey, would you like to
upgrade to a paid version? No for free? Something I
used to get for free and now I pay for it.
Oh that sounds like a good deal.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (00:54):
Well even Netflix now is adding ads to their paid service.

Speaker 2 (00:57):
Oh yeah, it's getting worse and worse.

Speaker 3 (00:58):
So sixty Days In it's these people, some of them
used to be cons and they go into prison to
help the sheriff and the warden kind of see like
the food is actually dangerous here that they kind of
spies and they go in to prisons.

Speaker 5 (01:13):
Did they have like body cams?

Speaker 2 (01:14):
He and cam?

Speaker 3 (01:15):
Yeah, And that's my beef with it is like, so
the producers tell them. First of all, the producers, I
don't think you've ever been a prison, because the producers
tell them, when you get into your cell, your cell
by yourself, there's a camera up in the in the
left corner, and you just talk to the camera and
tell us if you need anything, then your thoughts, and
we're recording that. We'll put that on the episode. Yeah,

(01:35):
I'm in the next cell. I hear a guy talking
to him going, Yeah. Another thing the foods I would
like to be pulled out of here is that this
guy's I'm gonna shrink this guy. This guy is a spy.

Speaker 2 (01:43):
Yeah, he's he's an inside guy.

Speaker 5 (01:45):
No, I'm doing it for you.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Yeah, I'm trying to.

Speaker 5 (01:48):
I want to help you.

Speaker 3 (01:49):
Yeah, but my face was on when I offered you
weed and you decline. Now I got another two years.

Speaker 4 (01:55):
Yeah, hockey honkey, you said the H word.

Speaker 2 (02:00):
We're gonna get banned.

Speaker 3 (02:01):
But it's very interesting. And then the funny thing is
these are reality TV stars, right, and they put them in.

Speaker 5 (02:07):
It's a real prison.

Speaker 2 (02:08):
Are you kidding?

Speaker 5 (02:09):
They get permission from the prison.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
It's a real prison.

Speaker 4 (02:11):
That is really strange. I don't think you see that
happening in real life.

Speaker 3 (02:14):
You should watch it.

Speaker 2 (02:15):
It's really prisons don't care about the inmates.

Speaker 4 (02:17):
You say, yeah, you know, my bad. It's a little
bit lumpy. Yeah, you know, when I think about it,
just take a look at my take a look at
my hand right now, see see something something rising up?

Speaker 3 (02:27):
Did you hear about Mike, which is sorry, that's your joke,
your premise, But did you hear about Mike? Know what happened?
He got a Lamborghini and a that's your joke. No,
he went into this reality show and they sent him
into a prison. But not a real person, right, yeah,
a real person and he got stabbed at death. There's
nobody to stop them. Yeah, you could get stabbed yeah.

Speaker 5 (02:48):
Oh yeah easily.

Speaker 4 (02:49):
And they could think here, they probably think the guy
like you're saying, would be an undercover cop.

Speaker 5 (02:52):
Yeah, you're trying to get.

Speaker 3 (02:53):
That's what most of them thought yeah, And so these
are reality stars. They thought they were gonna get famous
by going into prison and it's gonna help their So
it's gonna help their social media, right, And they have
these guys. They have a gay guy who's just we
love gay guys, We have gay friends. But he's like
flaunting it in prison. The orton said, you don't want
to be out it as a reality star, and you

(03:15):
definitely don't want to be out and it's gay because
you're gonna be a hot blonde, you're gonna be flavor
of the week. You're gonna be like a popsicle. This
is these guys haven't been laid and side you're gonna
you're gonna get.

Speaker 5 (03:34):
Every day and.

Speaker 3 (03:36):
Every day. And then and then they have a gay
guy and he's kind of flaunting and they told him,
don't do that. Do you know where you are, you're.

Speaker 5 (03:44):
In person, basically in prison.

Speaker 4 (03:45):
Even if you are, you know, you don't want to
attract attention for any reason, right, You just want to
keep your head down and get through it.

Speaker 3 (03:51):
And he said, if something happens to you and get assaulted,
you're gonna leave. A real inmate can't leave. We might
move him, but they'll know you were in C block.
Now you're in a block because you got assaulted.

Speaker 2 (04:06):
So then it's kind of on your record in it.

Speaker 3 (04:08):
But no, I mean there's people, there's they talk to
people on a block and a bloc toss the sea block.
He's not here anymore. What happened to him? He got
extracted because he.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
Was a spy, right, and then you're an even bigger trouble.

Speaker 3 (04:19):
Then they get out of prison and it's like Robert
de Niro in Cape Fir Cathler, Cathler, I don't know
why you had a list. They'll track your family down.
And a lot of these episodes they suspected them of
being cops, so they had the producers extracted them.

Speaker 4 (04:35):
Why would you even do You've got to be insane
to do that series. People really will die for fame.
They will will die for fame.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
Mike, I got this great new job. It's a reality show.
I'm going to prison. I might get assaulted. I might
get essayed, which is what you say. Now, you'll get
blocked on YouTube if you say, if you spell it out,
I might get assaulted in a in a private way.
I might get stabbed. I could die, but I'm gonna
be fam It's time to.

Speaker 4 (05:00):
Get views like you would not believe you're right? Really,
can you leave views to your kids?

Speaker 5 (05:05):
Hey?

Speaker 3 (05:06):
Guess what? You're also going to get the Darwin Awards.

Speaker 4 (05:08):
Hey, Johnny, good news, your dad passed away and he
left you all his views twenty million.

Speaker 5 (05:13):
But he's famous. He's famous for getting shanked in prison.

Speaker 3 (05:18):
I just thought, what a stupid who would do that?
And the funny thing, the thing that kind of it's
not funny it makes me angry is the longer they're
in there, they start to take on the personas of
actual inmates, of course, to complain about the food. Yeah,
we've got your yula right here, user liability agreement. Now
you signed a contract with the producers. Don't complain about
the food. But they're doing it for you know, too insane.

Speaker 2 (05:40):
I've never heard of it, but now I just.

Speaker 4 (05:42):
Think, Wow, would you put going into prison for any reason?
You're putting your life on the line. Really, you could
be killed for anything in.

Speaker 3 (05:48):
There, except you know, in the Mince prison, nobody cares
about if you're a wheel bow. I wouldn't mind you
going there.

Speaker 5 (05:53):
Probably year, it says all day Mark.

Speaker 3 (05:56):
Yeah, I could do that. These guys have never says
they have not said says that for one minute.

Speaker 5 (06:01):
They could never.

Speaker 4 (06:02):
They couldn't even make it through a Japanese funeral.

Speaker 3 (06:04):
No, they would be like they get beat en up
for not being able to use chop six. Yeah, you know,
all right. So I thought it was an interesting series,
but the contestants were so entitled, and they were complaining
and they were being prima donna's and eventually, like the
other imags are like, I don't think this guy his
cover story is that he did San Quentin. I don't
think he's ever done sand cultin And they would say

(06:26):
stuff to them like you never been in prison before?
You told me you did four years And then they
start talking It's like, guys a narc guys.

Speaker 4 (06:34):
Should have said that they'd been in prison before. That's
just a bad idea.

Speaker 5 (06:37):
Then the guy will say, oh, you were in San Quentin,
So how'd you.

Speaker 4 (06:40):
Like the did you know that guy over there and
my friend he everybody knows him over there?

Speaker 3 (06:45):
You were in cel cell B.

Speaker 5 (06:46):
Yeah, do you know Carlos?

Speaker 3 (06:49):
Yeah? Tell me about Carlos? How tall is he? I
don't remember meaning him that much or you're a shanky
man because Carlos was in cell.

Speaker 5 (06:56):
Black d Right, that's the kind of story.

Speaker 3 (06:58):
Everybody knows that you just shouldn't.

Speaker 4 (07:00):
Say anything in prison. I mean, I've never been in prison,
but even I.

Speaker 3 (07:03):
Know that they're in prison, and then all they do
is talk. It's like women. It's like girls at the
coffee shop. That's all they do. Nothing better to do
something suspicious about Mike anything. I didn't pick up on
anything you got. Well, he was complaining about the food,
but he said he's been in prison for twenty years
in another place. And then I asked him why he
was moved here and he said he killed a guy,

(07:26):
but he doesn't have a tear drop or anything on
his face.

Speaker 4 (07:30):
I guess they do that backstory to try and intimidate
the other prisoners to say, yet, don't don't mess with me.
But it kind of like you said, it just sets
you up for an even worse kind.

Speaker 5 (07:40):
Of yeah thing.

Speaker 3 (07:41):
It's like, I've kind of suspicious about Mike. This new inmate.
He said he was with the Bloods and I'm in
the Bloods and I'm black, and he's a white Canadian.

Speaker 5 (07:52):
He said he ran the Ottawa branch.

Speaker 3 (07:56):
Another callback to Goodfellas, when Henry Hill was in prison,
he was trying to convince his wife that you got
to get me out of here. I'm going to get killed.
They think I'm a nark and he was. They think
I'm I'm a spy and he was. And he goes, well,
you're in prison. What can happen to you there? And
he goes, how much time you got? Almost? You know,
It's like, he goes, I'm not safe in prison. I'm

(08:16):
safer on the outside. He goes, no, but if they
want to get you, they'll get you. And he goes,
if they want to give me, they know my cell number,
and they give me in the shower and oh, they said,
that's another thing in the episode. They said, if you
don't take a shower the first couple of weeks that
you're there, we know you're new. Ah, because guys have
been in prison aren't afraid to take a shower. They

(08:37):
know how to fight. And you know, if you go
without taking a shower for two you said you did
two years prison. Nuggetedn't yeh.

Speaker 2 (08:44):
So I was just what a bad idea for a series.

Speaker 3 (08:46):
But these producers like, how do you sleep at Night Man.
Somebody could get killed.

Speaker 4 (08:49):
Yeah, no, seriously, that'd be great.

Speaker 5 (08:53):
Oh yeah, I think of the ratings.

Speaker 4 (08:54):
I mean that is this We're getting to the level
of it's almost like the Running Game.

Speaker 2 (08:58):
You remember the Running Game?

Speaker 5 (08:59):
Or it was the Running Man?

Speaker 2 (09:00):
Remember the Running Man?

Speaker 4 (09:01):
Vaguely with which is like, it's kind of like the
it was the Hunger Games before the Huer Games. Basically,
I mean we're getting that point with reality TV. I mean,
what's the next thing you're gonna do.

Speaker 3 (09:11):
There's a podcast I've mentioned before. You wouldn't like it.
But Adam Curry, a guy I worked with. It's Z
one hundred New York. John Devorak. He was a tech
nerd wrote for magazine for People.

Speaker 5 (09:20):
Oh yeah, he was famous, Yes, PC magazine.

Speaker 3 (09:22):
Adam has been predicting this for ten years, and I
think we're almost there. He said, in the states that
have capital punishment, if you had pay per view and
he gave half the money to the family, it would
be the number win show. God. And I'm sorry to say,
I think he's right. Yeah, that's where we're going.

Speaker 2 (09:42):
There would be people interested. I just don't want it.

Speaker 3 (09:43):
That's where we're going at. That is hunger games.

Speaker 4 (09:45):
You know, it's like rotten squid game is what that
basically squid game. That's that's there, most modern version. But
I mean it's like, was it rotten dot com was
a sight.

Speaker 2 (09:53):
I don't even know if it's around anymore. But that's
the kind of thing.

Speaker 4 (09:56):
Is like all of these grotesque videos, and I'm like,
I just don't I want to sleep at night. You know,
I don't want to go to go to bed, close
my eyes. There's enough nasty stuff going on in the
world already on the news. Do I really want to
go to a website and watch a guy get killed?

Speaker 5 (10:09):
I mean, wow, Well, in.

Speaker 3 (10:10):
The eighties and nineties they had the snuff stuff. I
forgot the name of that art video horrible. It was
the number one video rental. I forgot the name of it,
but it was basically a bunch of snuf stuff. It's like,
you know, bomb detective cops getting blown up and stuff.

Speaker 4 (10:24):
It's just I mean, I don't understand people who are
fascinated by that. I really don't understand that fascination the gore.

Speaker 2 (10:32):
I don't get it.

Speaker 3 (10:33):
Listen if you want to not be able to sleep
at night, just listen to more episodes of Talk Funny,
or come to our show.

Speaker 4 (10:38):
Come to our show, and you'll be able to sleep
really well with a good conscience.

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Mark Bailey, Mike Miller, Talk Funny,
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