E071 -Talk with Teddy - Gay Monogamous Relationship, do they exists_ - Talk with Teddy- Late Show - Variety/Random

Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Tell you to the same old,same old. Then check out Talk with
Teddy. Each week there new guestsand new topics. Talk with Teddy Tuesdays
and Thursdays at ten pm Eastern StandardTime. I'm monogamous relationships a thing of

(00:29):
the past in the gay community,others being shamed from wanting a monogamous relationship.
What's your opinion tonight? I talkwith Teddy at me, get the

(00:49):
mics un muted, and then wecan start chatting. I'm just like,
oh, here, I am,here, I am, but I couldn't
hear myself or anybody else. Typical, typical, Okay, So, um,
we have some more guests hopefully stillarriving. We're talking about kind of
a serious issue for some of us. Um, you know, it's it's

(01:11):
yeah, it's it's one of thoseyou know, um topics that in the
gay community. I mean, forlike, well normal community, we don't
ever hear about it or talk aboutit. But in the gay community,
it's one of those things that,um, if you're gay and you want
to be with one person and oneperson only, you're kind of be in

(01:33):
shame for it. And you knowa lot of these other people believe it's
it's stupid. You don't you shouldn'tbe with one person, and you know,
blah blah blah. But let metell you, um, I know
for myself, I've I've always wantedjust one person, you know, I
didn't want to share, I guessis the best way they put it.

(01:57):
But there are a large popular relationof men in the gay community that they
just don't want to be with oneperson. So so I have more guests
arriving. But who I have rightnow with me is I have t Roy
and Kevin, who's at the topof the screen on my screen anyways,
and they have been together fourteen years. I made a goof and said nine

(02:21):
years. But they've been together fourteenyears, which is a pretty damn long
time, you know, especially inthe gay community. And then below them
and blow me, I have Aaronhere with me, and Aaron is like
me, gay man that wants amonogamous relationship, but we have a hard
time finding one. Now I'm inNew York and he's in Mexico, and

(02:43):
I'm hoping that these other gentlemen willshow up, hopefully soon enough. So
I figured it's kind of weird,But I was doing a little bit of
research, and I think it's youwouldn't believe the amount of stuff that's out
there out monogamous relationships, especially gaythe gay community. There's a lot.

(03:04):
But one of the first things Iwanted to go over goo. That's a
gono word from member Gary Ganousno.Anyways, Monogamy the practice of practice,
or state of being married to oneperson at one time. Judaism has journeyed
from polygamy to straight monogamy, thepractice or state of having a sexual relationship

(03:27):
with only one partner. Younger menwere more likely to stray from that,
saying that monogamy is outdated. What'sreally kind of like a kick in the
rubbert parts is that zoology, thehabit of having one mate at a time
is rare in the animal I don'tknow community or in the wildlife. It's

(03:52):
usually more common with just birds.Birds are ones that really are monogamous,
where a lot of your animals aren't. So I think that's kind of kind
of strange, don't you guys?Yeah, yeah, you know, well
what makes us believe because we're mammals, we are animals ourselves, why do

(04:12):
we of all people want to bemonogamous? Any any anybody want to throw
in there. Me personally, UM, I've always wanted to just have one
man, because how do you knowthat if there's other people in it?
How do you know you? Andwith my husband and my experience with him

(04:39):
is, you know, I knowthat he wants me, and I just
go that feels great to know thatthere is a man that wants to give
his life. I mean, ifit came down to it, m and
I wouldn't like like anybody else,I definitely would be kind of hard.

(05:00):
I was born to raise that.You know, our monogamous you know it's
out there, but even when we'rebeing raised up right right. Well,
we now have Gary or Greg joinedus as well. Hello Greg, Welcome
to the show. UM. Sowe were talking about UM the beginning.

(05:23):
I don't know if you saw it, Greg, but it's kind of weird
that in the Animal Kingdom, theit's only nine animals or nine UM preachers
in the wild actually have monogamous partners, and most of them are birds.
And I found it weird that we'reanimals as well, and you know,

(05:44):
we want monogamy just as well.And I was trying to figure out why
would we want monogamy if the majorityof the animal kingdom isn't looking for that.
And I was going to Aaron nextif you if you had anything to
say, Aaron, Well, forme, it's more about building a project
with another person, and I thinkit's easier to be able to build this

(06:11):
kind of life project with someone whenit's like just two people. For as
for the any animal kingdom, Ibelieve they are not. They don't have
anogamy because they are trying to youknow, persevere their syncreases so they have
to reproduce themselves with as many othermates as they have. But also as

(06:35):
humans, I don't think we're tryingto especially me, I'm not really I
don't want to have any babies oranything. I just want to have like
a fatally within another man. SoI think that's that's what I think we're
different from animals, right, howabout you? Greg? I think it
gives us the difference between animals andhumans is a tocterize. Sorry it's late

(07:09):
here in Saint Louis and I'm anold man. Um. I think I
think a lot of this is aboutum our willingness to uh communicate um with
another human. You know, wecould think, I think in many we
can. We can compare ourselves toanimals as much as we want. The

(07:30):
bottom line is do they feel withtheir heart like we do? Right?
And I think monogamy U monogamy tome is when we um, when we
are cheated on, we feel likewe have failed ourselves or that that person
doesn't love us. And so Ithink our animal instances as men, especially

(07:54):
gay man, is to have sexuh and multiply people as we as we
can. And unlike the animals,I don't think that they really have this
feel about them. What they havein their heart is different than what they
have in their well. The biggestthings, the biggest things about us.

(08:20):
First off, we're human, andhuman sets us from the animal kingdom because
of our brain because we think we'rethinking creatures, we actually able you know,
socialize, communicate verbally. Um,there's just so many things that are
so different from us than animals.So for the animal kingdom to procreate and
just you know, like a lion, a male lion will you know,

(08:43):
screw as many lioness as he wants, and that's because it's his pride and
he's able to do that. Buthe's looking to procreate where in you know,
which is kind of a heterosexual thing, not a homosexual thing, you
know, is that an instinct,you know, is to multiply and carry

(09:05):
their breed on, right, right, that's the case some of these,
some of some of us are guiltyof trying to carry our breed on.
Yeah, that's true. That's absolutelytrue, Kevin did were you going to
say something? And there are fewanimals that have sex just for pleasures?

(09:26):
Dolphins and writing same right, andthey still there right creation we do so,
I mean they're the closest in theygoing like golphers did parent conversations to
their places and they all know howright, so husins and so everyone's right,

(09:58):
and you know, I mean that'sthat's here's the thing. Animals do
it to procreate. They don't doit for pleasure, you know, where
humans do. I mean, we'renaturally curious about so many different things,
but when it comes to pleasure,we want it and that's it, and
so on and so forth. Butwhat what I don't get in this whole

(10:18):
thing is, I mean, heterosexualshave been having this monogaonous relationship for forever,
and I know that with us,with gay men, there are a
big handful of us that still wantthat. But to the new generation it's

(10:39):
poopa. You know, it's likesomething that it doesn't it shouldn't exist anymore.
It's like, who wants to dothat? Then they all want to
go out and you know, screwthe next we're ab that hole. I
mean whatever. I mean, it'sjust it's just I find it. I
find it confusing. I mean,but I think when they get older,

(11:01):
I think they may settle. LikeI'm fifty three years old and I know
it this time in my life,I want one man to settle down with
for the rest of my life,because I might only have twenty thirty years
left and I want to devote whatI have in my heart to one person.
I heard you were very young athard, so I find that hard
to beleeve. I have you pickedfour years and I don't know. You

(11:31):
know, it's an interesting thing.I think when we approach and I was
gonna comment on that, I thinkas we approach our sixties, we see
life a little differently. Yeah,we were in twenties, you know,
we wanted to sample it and timesare a little different now. You know,
when we were in our twenties,it was not okay to be gay.

(11:54):
We didn't have the that's true toget married and let's true, it's
absolutely true. Go ahead, Eric, No, we're talking. But probably
because I'm from a very um youknow, culturally Mexico, it is still
very behind. And when it comesto gay people and being gay, I
was close at it until like probablythree years ago. And what I think

(12:18):
it's that we because we have adifferent way to live our life. I
mean, we have to pretend we'renot gay most of the time, and
we don't really have a real relationshipuntil we're like twenty five or so.
We want to eat the world,so basically we just want to, as
you say, have sex and thenlook for the next good thing that's coming.

(12:41):
But because I was raising a youknow, like a traditional family,
I guess, and my parents werevery welcoming once they understood that I was
not going to change. I was. I'm still looking for that. I
mean, I'm twenty five, I'mpretty horny all the time. Yeah,

(13:05):
but I still want for just oneperson, right right, Yeah, I
think I And it's weird because youknow, it's a fact because of all
the research that I've been doing onthis topic for the past couple of days,
I've ran across a lot of statisticsand a lot of um um polls

(13:28):
where they have interviewed like colleges ofgay men. You know, they're all
these college students that were gay andum what they're what they thought of monogamy,
And for the majority of them,they're like, oh, no,
no, no way, I wantto I want to dip my rod as
many places as I can. Andyou know, I don't know if it's
because of that. Let's let's uh, you know, what are they sow

(13:50):
your Is it so your woll youknow what I mean, Yeah, you're
oats and stuff like that. Imean, is that is that what it
is? Who knows? But astime goes on, I mean I'm pretty
sure that with Greg and myself becauseI'm not gonna I'm just saying because of
our ages that for us, yes, growing up to where it was,

(14:11):
it was hard for us to comeright out and say, hey, this
is who we are and to havea relationship. A lot of that was
hidden behind closed doors. I mean, it was stuff that we still had
to worry about getting beat up,we still had to worry about being ridiculed
and everything else. But you know, it's this, I believe it or
not. And I'm not trying tosound like a jerk, but this younger

(14:33):
generation has got it made because ifit wasn't for the older generation laying a
paved road for them, they wouldn'thave what they have right now. No,
and I think we should be awareof that because nowadays, especially my
generation, we think we take itso easy to discriminate towards other gay people,
especially like very feminine guys, andwe're not we're not understanding that it

(14:58):
was those feminine guys that, thanksthanks to their courage of being outside there
and being like hmm, they didn'tmind people have been killing them in public.
It's that we can say, oh, I like masculine guys in gay
ups. I mean, it wasthem that fight for us, and all

(15:20):
of them were. Today we're like, oh, so you're very feminine.
I don't like you. I mean, I think that's just stupid. But
you know, Queen, that soTROI like you, like, you're not
young, young, but you're young. I'll give you that. Well,

(15:45):
but but how was it for you? Now? You live there, you
go, but you live you liveout on what state now, Branson,
Missouri, Missouri? So you liveout in the country. You live way
out where there aren't hill billies.There are people that still believe that gay
people should be thrown on their ownplanet and blown up. No matter where

(16:10):
I've been, there's always been that. But I've always found another side too,
where like Big Hilly he loves meto death and I love him to
death. He's like my best friendin the world, and he's totally straight.
His life's here, you know,And it's like there's good people,

(16:34):
but there's also bad. There's nevergood without the bad, and there's bad,
right right, you know? Right? Yeah. I'm from like population
at one time five hundreds. It'sa very small town and a very live
fact was people that didn't realize thefact that I like and I like who

(16:59):
I am. I to show whoI am any right, right, right?
I earned that in my mind.Well, it's gotta be like to
me, it's like a miracle thatyou found somebody in such a remote area
to be in love with and beinga relationship with for fourteen years. That's
like, it's amazing because like Gregand Aaron and myself, we're sitting here

(17:22):
doing what the f Where's where's ourhusbands? Where's our husband's damn it,
it's there. Some of us overlook for it to show down, take
a little bit of more time inyourself, right and let him come to

(17:45):
you. Yeah, I wasn't.Look, I wasn't totally. I didn't
even know his name, guys,totally like Emarius, I just met the
man I'm gonna marry. I don'teven know. She's like, I want

(18:07):
really so I'll tell you something thatsomething else, uh teddy that I think
you're interrupting. Is at fifty sevenfor the last place since I've been fifty
five, um, and I'm startingto get a little gray here. Everybody's
and I just to have that sexylook. But it is mine. It's

(18:30):
damned to be that sexy, isn'tit right? Yeah, it's hard.
It puts me in some place thatI never thought I would be, and
that was in this position that twentyto thirty year olds are attracted to me
because and I'm not blowing my ownharm. Please don't think that. If
you could see me, you knowI've got man boom bigger than anyway.

(18:53):
But a bro, I think it'ssomething that since I turned fifty five,
Um, all of these kids havebeen coming up to me, calling me
daddy and wanting to, uh,you know, approach me into a relationship.

(19:18):
And uh, I'm not seeking somebodythat is really young, although if
I fell in love, I fellin love, right, you know,
I would be more teddy somebody.You know, your age, what'd you
say you were thirty? Oh ohyeah, oh oh oh oh oh oh
yeah nine. Uh you know,so we can die together greg a wheelchair

(19:45):
when we get older. But Ithink I think everything is you know,
it's kind of unbalanced right now insideof our community. I think it's very
interesting how there's uh recently either Iguess as little as the last three or
four years, I've become aware ofwhat a fan sexual was. Right,
we all know what bisexual and allthe LGBTQ. Uh. You know,

(20:10):
now we're getting other idea of peoplewho identify differently, and uh it encouraged.
It's encouraging to the gay community becausethere are more of us, Yes,
there are more of us than we'vebeen holding back what is inside of
it. Here's the bad thing aboutthat though, It is confusing as all

(20:30):
hell because there are times where it'slike you talk to something. I'm still
trying to catch up with the whatis it the millenniums, the millennials,
the GG the Z. I don'teven whatever I mean I have, I
have no idea. I'm just likeyou know, I'm a simple fifty three

(20:52):
year old man that just as lookingfor love, looking for one person.
I don't care how they is.As long as he's into me, I'm
happy. That's that's what I want, you know, because as a person
that's young ish, I guess ofyou, my ex boyfriend was older than

(21:19):
some of you. So here's thething, here's a funny thing. We
moved together to portoga Arta. Probablysome of you people have heard of that
gay destiny. Yeah. I likeolder guys because they're more focusing too,
like having a real relationship and anagamusone. Well, sadly he was the
one that left me for the partylifestyle after he finds out that people,

(21:44):
you know, younger people were intohim, and they were like thousands of
young Mexican guys looking for this.He was American. Well his delays,
I guess looking Kim, so he'slike, hey, you know what,
this this has been great, butI think I'm ready for something else.

(22:06):
So not all of young people.It's like ready for party or not.
All of us have that issue,right, I mean that shouldn't for that
connection and as we say, right, so, maybe we shouldn't put all
the younger generation into that, andespecially because Greg was even saying that at
this age of fifty five, hewas getting hit on, you know,
younger generations. So and I agree, we suck. That's why I don't

(22:29):
like people my age, because wereally suck. It's this is a rated
our show. I'm so glad.I'm so glad this is a rated our
show. Uh, Aaron, Ihear what you say, and I can
respect that. I have come acrossa couple of guys that were, you

(22:51):
know, twenty five, twenty four, and my friends who were you know,
five fifty seven, like I am, They're like, what could you
possibly have in common with that personal? Um? And I keep asking them
why do we have to be thesame age to have stuff in common?
But also that challenge, I mean, impressing, impressing, sorry, to

(23:15):
get to impressed someone like me,it's really easy, I mean not someone
like me, but you know,young people, we get impressed really easily.
But to impress someone older, that'sa real challenge. I think we
younger people should be proud that we'resmart enough to keep up with someone as
smart as and experience as some ofyou guys. So for me, it's

(23:37):
it's like a symbiotic relationshipship where Imight be offering you youth, but you're
offering me money and sex. Butfor some of us, it's really that
intellectual sharing with a person that hasbeen in this work thirty years more than
you. I mean, I haveI have met some younger gay men that

(24:03):
are like, they're really into oldermen and they really just want to feel
love, be loved, and theywant somebody that has the experience so that
they don't have to look for somebodyelse. They want somebody to teach them
the ropes and how to have areal relationship and be in a real relationship.
But it's far and view in between, to be honest with you,
I mean right now in the gaycommunity, and it's a big issue in

(24:25):
certain places. Anybody that wants amonogamous relationship is really being shamed. We're
really getting a lot of ship behindthe don't you know thrown at us,
and it shouldn't happen that way.Now. I was looking at some of
the statistics and some of the thingsI found on the line and these you
know, it was asked, it'slike, okay, so having a monogamous

(24:48):
relationship, what does that offer?You know what, what does a monogamous
relationship really offer? Well, what'swhat it offers is is is this it's
you know, this is this iscoming from let me see where I think
I wrote down where it's coming from. This is coming from the psychology,

(25:11):
psychology and me online. And whatthey're saying is is that sex can improve
with time. Monogamy isn't just aboutmarrying off before anything starts to sag age
can also mean that you get toknow your body better. You become more
comfortable in your own skin, Youleave youthful insecurities behind, and your partner

(25:32):
learns your body so well they couldnavigate you blindfolded. Given enough time,
you and your partner can discover untoldroots to your happy place. Why would
you want to keep starting from scratchand having to break out the instruction manual
all over again. And that's agood point when it comes to sex in

(25:55):
a monogamous relationship. That is verytrue. And I know what positions last
for a while? Team, whereare you getting read it's awesome. Now

(26:23):
it's awesome. Now here's number twofor this and why monogamy is a good
thing. It says cuddling comes naturally. There's no awkward pre sleep shuffle as
you try to find the best spooningposition that will be comfortable all night.
After years together, your body's justnaturally, naturally fall into place around each

(26:44):
other. Now here's something that Iwill tell you is that over the years,
I've had four like real relationships whereI was with somebody for a lot,
Like one was ten years, onewas four years. No two or
four years, so okay, yeahit is. But anyways, when I
found us, like in the beginning, you know, you you try to

(27:04):
find a way to sleep, buteventually it's kind of like your heartbeats sync
up and then you can sleep.And it's like, if you truly want
to be with that person, yourbodies start to you know, react to
each other, and then sleep naturallycomes the way it's supposed to, you
know, you know, so that'snatural. Like we don't feel in any

(27:27):
way except I feel that we areliving a life that we are supposed to
h together. And I don't haveany worries. I've never worried about anything,
run off saying off, nothing likethat smile on his face. He's

(27:51):
smiling. He is smiling exactly exactly. It's work, you know, because
you don't know how the other person. Yes, it is, and it's

(28:11):
but it's rare roaring at the end. Yeah, and I conceive the two
of you are very happy, andI think that, Yeah, well,
I brought them to the show,right, And that's why I brought them
to the show was so that we'resupposed to have a couple of the people
with us. And I thought ifI brought them on as well as like
my co host, because I've knownyou know, t right for a while

(28:33):
now, I figured, you know, it would be good to have a
married couple tell us what they havegone through and how long they've lasted and
how they've dealt with certain things.Um, but I want to go back
to this, Yeah, what we'redoing wrong, But maybe I can help
with that by the end of thisresearch here. So anyways, Number three

(28:56):
on how why monogamy is good,It says peace of mind about STDs.
Assuming both of you are true toyour vows of sex fidelity, then you
don't have to worry about contracting anyother disease, especially sexually transmitted um infections.
Because you're a couple, you've beentogether for a while, you're gonna
be there. You can you cantrust that somebody you know isn't bringing you

(29:18):
something. And if you've been thatway since the beginning and he's not cheating
or you're not cheating, then youdon't have to worry about it. So
monogamy is a good thing. Itis, you know. Um, I'm
going to move on to number four. Interrupt me if you need to,
because um, so we can stopand talk about whatever these So number four,
Freedom from relentless beauty rituals. Oh, this is all t right.

(29:44):
We're not saying sorry to you,right. We're not saying that once you
make we're not saying that once youmake a sexual commitment to someone for the
long haul, all thoughts of personalhygiene and grooming should go out the window.

(30:06):
In fact, the longer you're you'vebeen married or with someone, the
nicer it is to regular gusting yourselfup. However, the ridiculous boot or
beautiful standards of people, especially women, are expect to live up to these
days are automatically lowered. When youspend day after day after day with one
person. So meaning, you know, for me, it's like you roll

(30:27):
over, You're gonna see the wayI wake up with my hair. I'm
as well, whatever hair I've gotleft, you know, and you know
you're gonna deal that. I don'tknow, me grabbing the redgie out of
my you know, boxers or youknow whatever, and me and me getting
up in the morning with bad breath, Well, don't breathe on me or
don't smell my breath in the morninguntil I brush, you know, So

(30:49):
that I say, that's true.I like it. Ers Errands is his
own little world right now. Sowe're good. I get it. I

(31:12):
get it. I think it's awesomethat you're I think it's awesome that you're
bringing up these facts. That's that'sa good thing. It's a good thing.
You know. Some of them liketo sleep in your armpit. You
know. It's like, oh,I I'm glad. I'm just saying people,

(31:33):
all right, all right. Numberfive is open relationships are for an
elite few. It's the rare,highly evolved person missing the jealousy gene who
can successfully navigate the complicated waters ofrelationship with an open door policy. We're
not saying it can't or shouldn't bedone. We're just saying that most of

(31:55):
us are mere mortal and one whothrives on the simple security of a bond
with another person. You know,we that's pretty self explanatory, but you
know it's it's true though, youknow. I mean, I I don't
want a partner that's gonna say tome, hey, honey, we need
to bring in another person, orhey, I'm going out with my blah

(32:16):
blah blah, and we may justbe when I come back wiping off my
lips. Sorry you do that.And I have a jealous bone, and
I'm one of these people where it'slike you know what, Uh, Nope,
done, it's done either. Yeah. No, when I'm with somebody,
I want to know that I'm withthem, and I want them to

(32:36):
know that I'm with them, andthat means they're the most important person in
my life and I'm going to bethere for whatever reason. And if even
if I don't want sex and you'rehorny and you want sex, all right,
you know, I mean, it'sone of those you have to understand.

(33:05):
There you go, Are you done? Are you done? Ye?
Well, it's just yeah, Iwas being I was being funny because that's
who I am. I'm a funnyguy. But true, but when it
comes down to but when it comesdown to true relationships, you shush boo.

(33:30):
Anyways, it's just you know,I know, I know what I
want, and I'm hoping that mypartner wants the same thing. You know
from I'm actually broadcasting from south ofI'm in the Finger Lakes region of New
York. I'm in New York,Okay with that, nowhere near the city.

(33:54):
No, I'm out in the country. I got more cows than people.
Seriously, Yeah to your farm boy, Oh yeah, I'm a country
boy. Aaron and I are lookingfor relationships. We're going to come out
and meet you, because then there'sanother thing called to try ad. I

(34:17):
have enough hard enough time with one. I can't imagine two. I'm founding
myself as a one, so thatwould be free. But yeah, you
know, I guess I never gotthe mammal. But that is a good

(34:38):
comeback, Aaron, that was agood comeback. Yes, yes, I
hate to leave you, but Ihave to have got a very early date
tomorrow. I certainly have enjoyed thisand Ddy, I hope you will ask
me to come back again. Yeah, yeah, definitely when you can stay
longer. Yeah, I really wishI could. I unfortunately need to get

(34:59):
some that. As you can see, I'm not wearing a shirt. Yeah,
I know, clash everybody, butyou guys have probably already had your
supper. Well I wish. Iwish you guys good luck on your relationship
and continue success. Uh, Aaron, I'll see you at Teddy's next weekend.

(35:21):
My way. You guys, thankyou again for having me. Are
you welcome back? I'm back anytimeyou ask. All right, Thank you
guys, good night. Oh hewas a funny guy. I'm getting married

(35:44):
in June. I guess who isI am? Apparently? Who are to
who? To whoever? It's availableat this point. I mean, well,
it just so happens. I'm available, but you know, wow,

(36:06):
I just kidding. I just thankyou. You know what's funny? Troy
is Aaron and I actually talked overwas it messenger? Wasn't it when he
talked over a messenger a couple oftimes? Yeah? It was. Yeah.
He was obviously flirting with me,and I say, no, thank
you. I don't want to playyour house. Wow. You he didn't

(36:38):
want to clean my house. Huh. Well that's what we Mexicans do apparently.
Yeah, not not in my life. Uh no. Uh. Most
of the Mexicans, most of theMexicans I know up here, they work
and they work hard. I meanI'm as a country boy and I worked

(36:59):
on farms, and most of myfriends were Mexican. Because we all worked
out in the fields together. Wenobody was above anybody else. I mean,
I was fortunate to live in ina community where everybody was treated equal
unless you were gay. Your colordidn't matter, but if you were gay,

(37:20):
it mattered. But you know itwas it was different. Yeah,
well I was racing. I wasn'tborn in Mexico, just by the way.
I was born in Colombia. Butwhen I moved here, it was
funny for me because in Mexico Ihave never seen so much racism towards their
own kind. I guess because themore Mexican you look, the more like

(37:43):
this led you because you have darkskin and all that. So for me,
it was funny that mag you lookMexican, you can't be from other
countries. I'm like, I don'tsee why you say that. As an
insult, but I'm okay looking Mexican. I mean, I'm from Latin America.
We kind of look the same.So it's funny hearing where I'm now

(38:04):
where I was raised. This it'slike it's probably like the Alabama of Mexico.
It's people are very you know,religious focused and being gay. It's
just not okay here. So Imy first, you know, sort of
boy friend, because we really werenot together that long. He was married

(38:25):
to a woman with kids, andI noticed that's like a usual thing here.
So one day he was like,oh, I have something to say.
I have kids and they're your age. And I'm like, nice,
thank you for open to me.But yeah, this is a very traditional

(38:47):
area of Mexico. Well, yeah, I know how you feel. Catholicism
is heavy in Mexico. I mean, it's it's one of those things I
mean, and it's tough, um, I know, I know, for
us with just for me. Evenhere in the United States and New York
and New York is is supposed tobe one of the more open states,

(39:12):
you know what I mean, inthe in the whole United States, it's
supposed to be more open. Butyeah, but the ridicule and the prejudice
and the bullshit that I go throughstill today here. I mean, let
me tell you a real quick storywhen I grid, well, let's see,
graduate from my school nineteen eighty five, so this was between eighty five
or eighty six and like ninety solike four years in there. Um,

(39:36):
I couldn't even walk up the streetto the corner store without being harassed and
being threatened to be beat up.That's how bad it was. And I
actually had a brick smashed into myhead because I was and I literally I
had to fight off five or sixpeople myself. And but but I was

(39:57):
proud of myself because after I wasdone, and I stood there looking at
those guys, I'm like, ifyou want to continue, we can continue.
I'm not I'm not going to changewho I am because you want to
beat me up. This is whoI am exactly. That's the it was
the mentality. But see, that'sthe stuff growing up that we go through.
You know. My dad threw meout when I was fourteen. I

(40:21):
think that's I think that's when Itold them that I was gay. He's
the package shit and get out.That's why I didn't tell them until I
was out I'm honest, you can'trow me out because I'm already out pitches.
But anyway, yeah, it's like, what are you're gonna do?
And they were like no at thebeginning because I was having a comfortable life.

(40:52):
I was having pretty much everything Iwanted. I was like that,
give me money, because you know, I'm part of the family. So
it was not until I was outthere was like, oh, by the
way, I have news for you, because you didn't know it is I
am sort of different in your eyes. So he's like, well, I
have no power over you, sokudos to you. But I was afraid

(41:13):
of telling my family and they werethey were They had hard time understanding how
it was and how it worked.But because I wasn't here anymore, they
were not, you know, itwas easier for both of us. I
guess, yeah, right right,Well, you know, it's all of
us deal with who we are andthe reactions from others in so many different
ways. I like, I wassaying that I really thought that New York

(41:37):
was going to be different. ButI moved to Colorado and Texas and I
was more accepted there than I wasin New York. And it's weird.
I was just going to say it'sfunny that. I mean, I'm currently
living in Mexico City, which isa humongous and crowded city, and you
live in New York. As yousay, it's well accepted, and you

(42:00):
guys are living like deep down South, God bless your heart. And they
found a relationship. But I thinkbigger cities with bigger populations have a hard
time finding monogamous relationships because most peopleare trying are very superficial. But also
we're all they're always looking for thenext good thing because there's thousands of people

(42:23):
out there. So for guys thatfind a hard time, you know,
you live twenty five kilometers from eachother. You probably don't know what kilometers
are, but that's a lot ofa distance. You treasure, you know,
you you treasure the fact that youfound each other. So you take

(42:44):
care of each other and you,you know, nurture whatever the world for
that is. You know, youkeep fitting that relationship. Whereas for us,
it's like they will find you thenthey will be like he's okay,
but his neighbors more into this.Yeah, yeah, I get that.
So I think we sometimes bigger cities, it might look like we have an

(43:07):
advantage, but we really don't haveit right just you know, my partner
of you. Yeah, and alsogo ahead, go ahead, I'm just
gonna say that, you know,some of the stuff that I've been reading
about, um, you know,and I'm a gay man, I shouldn't
have to read, but I youknow, about this stuff. But statistically,

(43:28):
I wanted to kind of throw someof that stuff out there because people
don't understand, you know, theydon't understand how hard it is for a
gay man, okay, in thecity or in the country to find a
partner and be monogamous. I mean, I know for myself it's very,
very tough. I live in asmall community in the country. Um,
the nearest city is thirty five minutesaway, which doesn't seem like a lot,

(43:52):
but you know, um, AaronFrozy looks like he's sleeping. I
know, he looks like he's sleeping. Aaron, are you still there,

(44:17):
you froze. Yeah. Well,anyways, it's tough because there is less
gay people in where I live,and there are super mount there's a Yeah,
he's coming back in on the otherstream. Yeah, we lost you
on the other one. Okay.So anyway, well you were sleeping on

(44:39):
the other one. That's what itlooked like. You were froze and you
look like you were sleeping. Um. But you know, it's it's one
of those things where it's like youlive in like New York City, which
is like five hours away from me. I mean, I'm sure there's there's
somebody out there that would want me, but I'm not gonna want them because
this is where I live. Thisis my type of lifestyle. I like

(45:01):
the country and and you know allthis. I don't want to go to
gay bars. I don't want todo all that stuff. This is this
is my atmosphere, you know.And that was old too, like going
to the bars, and you know, I'm going to go to a bar.
I'm gonna go to the little bardown here and have a couple of

(45:21):
drinks with my people I went toschool with, you know, you know,
how would you carry out with myperfect boys? That yeah voice that
that kind of brought up question andI've been having especially because I have never

(45:42):
had a Mexican boyfriend. I mean, I only had two couples before.
But I think whenever I'm dating someone, I have a problem with because I
like to go out with my friendsclubbing and all that. I mean not
every day because I have a joband all that. But some of them
are like, I don't want togo, and I'm like, okay,
that's fine. If you don't wantto go with me, that's that's okay.

(46:07):
It's like, but I don't wantyou to go, and I'm like,
listen, I'm with you five daysa week. I love being with
you or whatever. I love spendingI'm trust I know exactly where's all trust?
No, But also it's like,we don't have to do every single
thing together. At some point,you have to let me go for five
minutes so I can fart, right, Yeah, So I guess I'm just

(46:32):
running into the brown people that justwant me attached to them, and it's
like I don't want you to go. I have a strong opinion about that
because it's like I have gotten inrelationships where you know, when you meet
me, this is how I am. So this is why. So when
we get in a relationship, don'texpect me to change just because we're together.

(46:53):
I mean, I may compromise oncertain things, but I'm not going
to change. You want to goto the city and party with your girlfriends,
or friends, go for it.Just do me a favor. Don't
cheat on me because I find outyou did, I'm cutting off your pecker
and putting it in your mouth.And you can go do whatever you want
because I'm there's gonna be times whereI'm gonna go with my friends and it's

(47:15):
all trust. You have to trusteach other with me, that's great.
Yeah, thing is when he wantsto go out with friends and I want
to sleep, so and you wantto sleep, I get there. But

(47:46):
I think I think there's a lotof Yeah, there's a lot of compromising
stuff that happens in relationships period.But if you really want to be with
somebody, then to me, yougive them everything you've got as in your
heart, your heart, You becomea couple. You trust each other.
Sure, there's going to be issuesof jealousy from time to time, and

(48:07):
but you've got to trust. You'vegot to learn to trust that that person
is going to and that's not crossthe line. Oh my god. Yeah,
because especially if you've been in relationshipsexcuse me, where somebody's crossed the
line, you've already been hurt bythat already. So you get you get
jealous, you get upset. Yeah, I know. Yeah, well I

(48:28):
have never been hurt, Like I'mstill having a great relationship with my excess
because at least with the last one, which was like the most serious relationship
I've ever had, which was almostfor years, which engage years, it's
like still a lot. He waslike, listen, I'm at this point
where I'm bored. So I thinkwe shall go different ways if you want

(48:53):
to. I'm like, yeah,because I mean, you didn't cheat,
and if you're honest about challenge yourlife right now, I mean I still
think you're an asshole, but yeah, so I mean I can't. I
have lots of friends that are likethat, So yeah, I don't see

(49:15):
why not. And you know it. But I disagree with the idea of
that once that you have a relationship, you end up hated that person.
I mean it was part of yourlife. I mean, you have to
take some responsibility on your bad tasteon man, instead of saying, all,
man, of shit, I lovethat you do you do you have

(49:37):
to take the responsibility and bad taste. And then I get it. I
think my family is serious. Myfamily man, and now our daughters the
team, And I'm like, you'renot in your hands. You're gonna find
it. Good man. You treatyou right and me like this, this

(50:00):
is what love looks like. Theother well, hopefully one time soon.
I mean that's awesome. No,that's cool, that's very cool. You
know. Getting back to to someof this other stuff that I had been
researching, I found I found itwas kind of um interesting, um,

(50:23):
especially um there there's this other like, um, how do I put it?
Um that palamori, which is theum the practice having multiple intimate relationships.
And I understand that that's what someof these there's some of these people

(50:46):
are into in the gay community whereit's having a relationship and it's most of
the time it's just a small romanticbit and then a lot of sex and
then goodbye and see you. Iwant more than that out of a relation
relationship. I don't want just somebodythat I can, you know, go
and have sex within then leave.But there's a lot of things in this

(51:08):
that say it's good for you aswell. Um, oh she's there,
you are. Yes, I'm sorry, the book was a busy day.
No, that's okay. Yeah,you're still welcome. You're still welcome.
Not a problem, thank you.So yeah, you're welcome. So it's

(51:31):
tough. It's tough in in inlike being you're wanting a monogamous relationship when
every time you turn around there's somebodythat wants you, but they want somebody
else too. So those you know, polymer relationship just doesn't work for me.
Yeah, you don't hurt myself esteemreally hard, I guess. Yeah,

(51:54):
it's like, oh so just useme and throw me away, your
peckerhead. I mean that's you know, like oh said, you just want
like I'm not good enough so thatyou need other people to fulfill whatever I
need you have, right, Imean I think I think when you want
like one person, um, likeI stated before, you want to give

(52:17):
them your full heart and you wantto be able to be there for them
and then be there for you.So the idea of bringing in another person
to me is kind of like,well, like what you were saying,
Earn, it's like, okay,what I'm not good enough, you can't
have just you know me, yougotta have you know, somebody else.

(52:38):
I mean, I don't know it. I think in relationships that if you
really try as two individuals to cometogether and give each other as much as
you can um as in your heart, your thoughts, your brains, or
whatever you want to call it,that whole relationship if you're both in it
one h I think you truly canbe happy. I really do. But

(53:00):
you've got to give it a chance. You know, we got one hundred
with us and it's always worked inthe fourteen years that we've been gither and
we communicated with each other. Alot of people don't communicate. It's like,
oh my god. You know,communication is a big key. It's

(53:23):
a huge key with the relationships.I don't care what kind of relationship it
is, whether it be your whetherthe man a woman work whatever, communication,
you can end up divorce and single. And now look at you guys.
You know, well that that damnthing that we have called the phone.
We're also used to text messaging orFacebook messaging and stuff that. You

(53:46):
know, the emotions don't get shownacross that, so, you know,
so we get lost in and inconversations or the emotion does, so sometimes
you don't know, right, youknow, damn back, you know,

(54:07):
kind of struggling with and we're traditionalto the fact that like he's the homemaker
and I'm the writer, so Igo out all day and work, I
come home to same house that pickedme alone if he's taken care of and
I like that. And that's whatworks for us, because that's what I

(54:31):
want and you'll get it. Youlet it come to me. So so
she should. We were how doI say to your name your first name
the way he said? Yeah,okay, cool. So yeah, we

(54:51):
we were sitting here talking about likethis whole thing about us, Like first
off, being a gay man,being like I live way out the country.
I live in the state of NewYork, but I live way out
in the country. I don't liveanywhere near New York City. New York
City is like five five hours away. So for me to find a relationship

(55:12):
with another gay man, especially monogamousone, is like one in a million.
Hey, I live in in Toronto. I still don't find anybody.
So it's not about the location,I guess it's it's about the mentality that
that that's that's what's important here tospeak about. And regardless of whether you

(55:37):
are in the country or you arein the city, it doesn't matter.
I guess that that. You know, the dynamics of a gay bagship are
so different. They're not like greatrelationships at all. Um. Also because
a lot of individuals are so insecurewithin themselves that for them to give that

(56:00):
emotional security to another person, itis very hard to come by. Oh
yeah, yeah, so that's that'sthe beastic I guess before from the Handison,
Well, you know, my problemis is I think that you know,
I've been living here, you know, the majority of my life,

(56:20):
and I've had four long lasting relationships. One was ten years, so and
then you know, I've had afour year or two four years and a
sixteen month or eighteen month or andit's like maybe I've worn my chances out.
Maybe you know, then I'm onlyfifty three. God damn it.

(56:44):
Wow, I think I'm twenty six. And where I West raised, it's
it's a very small town. Sodating here feels like being in a hamster
house because right, whatever gay guydoes. And I moved to the big
city and now I hated its bigcity. But the thing is gay people

(57:07):
out there, it's it's not thatmany. And you know, it's kind
of hard to date someone when youknow they already date someone you know,
and that that person that you know, well the bassole. I get it.

(57:28):
I get it. I don't wantto date my friend's ex boyfriend who's
a real asshole. I know youdon't want to do that. I mean,
it's a small community. So it'slike, so that's why I'm telling
you go over the seats. Imean Mexico, it's we're really easily impressed
here. I mean, if you'rea greenle, we will be like,
I love you already. So whatwell, if that's all I had to

(57:54):
do was go to fucking Mexico andcountrue here. I am trying to increase
tourism in Mexico, there you go. But I will tell you cont is

(58:14):
no is no different at all.It's the same thing in Toronto as well.
It's the same same situation. Youprobably know somebody or the pools so
different, especially like I am.I am in the bearer community. So
in the bearer community as others theless people. Absolutely, yeah. So

(58:36):
and then people have and then theyhave their creaks, and even isn't their
own claque. So if you wentto any very event, you were either
setting alone or you were not there. Yeah, che she is like so

(58:59):
funny. Um, you know it'sI don't know, it's just I guess
for me when I started doing theresearch about this subject, I was I
was really upset with the fact thatyou know, UM, I can't I
can't believe. I mean, therewere so many problems in the gay community,

(59:20):
and I know that it's a smallpond that we're all living in in
some sense, but to treat peopleas poorly as they do in their own
community of people, UM that arestanding right next to them fighting for the
same rights, it's kind of likecutting everybody's hands off, isn't it.
I mean, yeah, well,it's it's it's possibly very very very inclusive.

(59:49):
It's not it is not um,it is very very clicky. It's
it's it's very it's very bashing eachother a lot. Yeah, yeah,
judgmental, extreme UM. Jealousy runsa mock in the entire community. People
are jealous of each other a lot. I don't know why. And and

(01:00:13):
as I said, from from allof my research and from from what I
do UM on on a dly basis, I see that that that the emotion
and security part is the biggest factorthat they's there there. They have been
judged so much their their entire lives, they have been ostracized their entire lives,
yeah, so you would feel thatthey would probably not do that in

(01:00:35):
the in the community, but butno, it's just apposite, and it's
a weird mentality that that runs.They're very people who are that secure.
I think lots of us, andI would probably include myself here, have
a lot of resentment and we needto put it towards someone that on our

(01:00:57):
mind, it's weaker because we've beenthrough a lot of gay people already.
So whenever, like whenever we breakthrough that cocoon that it's like, okay,
I'm open, loud and proud,Jara Jara, and we see someone
that we can this one. Thisis my sound stream, but a US
or bully, it's like, letme do it, because I still have

(01:01:20):
all that aggression inside me and Ineed to take it towards someone. And
of course we will do it towardsthe quiet ones or the ones that are
different, the ones that are notmutual enough, or not cute enough,
or not rich enough. So Ithink that's just stupid. It's like,
we don't like that we were bulliedwhen we were younger and when we were

(01:01:42):
different, and now that we havethe power to make a change, we
decide to bully other people. Yeah, and it's just it's stupid as but
it's and it's happening like all thetime. I'm in the bear community as
well, and it's like it's hardfor me, Like my attraction is is
younger, thinner than me, that'smy attraction. But being in the gay

(01:02:06):
community, thanks, but being butbeing in the gay community, the bear
gay community, it's like we're automaticallyput in the same pile. And you
know, it's it's like, well, wait a minute. I mean,
yeah, I'm a bear and Ijust I mean, what do they call
them otters? I mean, Ilike, you know what I mean,
I like big men as well.I mean, but it depends on the

(01:02:30):
big man. I mean, itdepends on what, you know, what
I'm attracted to about him, youknow, it's it's it's all of that.
It's it's personality. It's it's youknow, something that I'm attracted to.
I mean, it has nothing todo with are they thin, are
they I don't know, macho?Are they feminine? Are they? You

(01:02:50):
know? It has I mean verylittle to do with that, because it's
more about how they treat me.They're personality. What I like, what
I don't like all this stuff.I'm picky, but I'm not that picky.
I know what I'd like, youknow, Okay, well, I
mean, I guess coming down toour topic of monogamy, I think it's

(01:03:13):
also but also very ready to findin in this community. Is also is
because um men in general, andI came and internet are are naturally bootistic.
Yeah, they are promiscuous, theyare boyotistic. They want to explore

(01:03:35):
and the ideas. Oh I wantto explore there. There's so much out
there. How can I just veit one person that doesn't register in their
minds? So easy? Um andI I come from from a from a
from a very traditional background, whereinI've seen my parents having an arranged marriage
and still being together for so long. Now, okay, illustrate couple.

(01:04:00):
But still it's just that, howdo you be with both persons my entire
life? That mentality has to beregistered in your mind to be to want
that that one person that you're okayto speak with that the entire life you
might not have all the time.That doesn't happen. It's nice you will

(01:04:20):
the things life comes in between.You have persons, you have work,
all that, But how do younavigate to all those that still be together?
That does not get registered in themind of a lot of gay men,
which which is which? Which againthey did they have not learned,
or that they did not see whatthey're uh peers or or parents have done,

(01:04:43):
and that just you know, transcendsin their relationships. So very few
of them, like like the onewe have here, can can go beyond
that and and be together for fourlike fourteen years now. But there aren't,
which is amazing. That's that's ararity. That's yeah, that's that's
a rarity, you know. Imean, it's it kills me that,

(01:05:08):
you know, I've heard stories overthe years. I mean, you know,
when I when I first started gettinginto relationships myself, I mean,
you know, I had lesbian friendsthat said, you know what, you'll
never You'll never be with nobody fora long time, or anyone in a
long time. Sorry proper English,You'll never be with someone that long because
you're uh. Men are not nests. They they don't want to settle down.

(01:05:30):
They don't want this. They wantto they want to sold the royal
oats. They want to go outand tap every ass that they can.
That's that's a that's a man's mentality, you know, and it kind of
now this brings back the whole thoughtabout looking at the animal kingdom. Think
about it, the male lion,the the you know what I mean that
the animal mentality is the same thing. They don't settle down with one lioness.

(01:05:54):
They take a whole freaking pride tolionesses. But that's that's exactly what
it is. And it's like,we have to want it. We have
to realize that, like with you, t Royan Kevin, there's compromises,
there's trust, there's all of thisstuff that you know, you have to

(01:06:16):
honestly sexually satisfy each other to wherehe's not gonna want to look for somebody
else. You're not going to wantto look for somebody else and and be
happy. I mean, you twohave a daughter together too. Now you
have a family. You have everythingthat myself and Aaron and she's just looking
for I mean, it's what wewant. We want a family. You

(01:06:39):
know, I'm happy, but youknow, it's just it's funny that the
way I will think about this becauseI recently, um, there's somebody that

(01:07:03):
I like it, and well Idid like and so I was reaching out
to him for a while and umhe huh snack him before I do.
Well. Yeah, but it's like, you know, it's it's uh,

(01:07:27):
it's one of those things where Iwasn't He made me feel like I wasn't
good enough for him, And it'slike, yeah, and that's not that's
not a relationship. That's you,like right off the bat bullying somebody.
That's you right after bat saying youknow whatever. It's like, so the
relationship has already had a rocky start, right from the first couple of words
out of your mouth. Well thisis what I like to do, and

(01:07:50):
you just you know, you don'thold up. And I'm like, uh,
well this is me. You don'tlike me for me, then screw
you goodbye. I that doesn't makesense. It's like I know I can't
do better. We'll go ahead anddo better. But if you think you
can do better, why are youhere? You're just looking for someone to

(01:08:10):
bully. Yeah, that's what itsounds like, right, OK, you
got to be relationships. There's noone better. I mean, you can't
knowing that you're handsome and you're smartand you're to catch, but that doesn't
keep you the right to bully anyone. I mean that just speaks to really
love of your self esteem. Ifyou need to be bullying, I'm okay.

(01:08:38):
So I'm not. I'm not laughingat you. I'm not laughing at
you. I'm laughing at a commentthat's in one of the Watch parties.
It's Kevin Farmer, mister Biggins,and he puts in here, I'm monogamous
because my wife made or my wifewould kill my ass. Yeah that's happy.

(01:09:05):
Yeah, but Biggins is true.I mean even even in and I've
seen it and we've talked about it. Um, even in heterosexual relationships,
there's a lot of that happening wherethey're not staying monogamous. They're going outside
the box these days. And it'sjust it's it's becoming more acceptable to be

(01:09:25):
this. What I say was polapoly mora. Yeah, that's it.
Yeah, it's it's more it's moreacceptable to be that way. But see,
when I was growing up as akid, I mean all I wanted
was watching TV. I mean Igot used to the stupid TV shows in

(01:09:46):
the sixties and seventies, but youknow, all I wanted was you know,
the house, the husband, thewhite picket fence, the kids,
the you know, that's what Iwanted. Yeah. Yeah, These people
e lyamorous relationships say that monogamy it'sa social construct, which I agree,
but it's a social construct I want, right, Yes, because you think

(01:10:09):
it's just a good idea doesn't meanit won't work for me. I mean,
I won't judge people with three boyfriends, but I want just one and
I wanted to work for them,right yeah. Shit, I'm not gonna
judge if you got three, butif I can have one, I'm definitely
gonna be happy and I'm not gonnacare about you when you're three, you
know. And I'm so stressful tojust have one person. You don't have

(01:10:32):
to go out for somebody else.It's so stressful. He he he vends
something else I was going to bringup when you have one person, Yes,
but it's just with the way societyis today. You're working a lot,

(01:10:53):
you have to pay so many bills, you have all the shit you
have to do, and to haveone of the person that you have to
have a relationship with, I can'timagine having a relationship two or three extra
people on top of that. Bulletsmad, you know, I mean,
I just I can't do it.How are you going to spread yourself through
all that does a lot of work, a lot of work. Yeah,

(01:11:16):
and so it's like, why areyou going to give somebody else that's not
going to do the same thing,which is gonna make it worse? And
then it's somebody all were lout staring, right, It's really hard, you
know, it's a lot that's startingto Stop playing with your phone, stop
playing with your disconnection. There No, I'm his mom live in the third

(01:11:51):
world. I have really bad Internet. I'm sorry. Mentally, yeah,
it's it's very mentally, emotionally,physically exhausting and draining to constantly be on,
you know, being out there tryto find somebody, go on those
multipulas. And I used to seethe same thing to go over again.

(01:12:15):
I actually now I have a scriptof the fanswer that I'm gonna tell I'm
gonna ask you questions like I havean answers done scripted down quickly when I'm
gonna answer. So it's so scriptso typical now, and it's very exhausting
for me. Anyways. So whenI go on Dad, I'm like,
okay, this is a question comingin. This does answer this the question
answer. Let's let's go through itnow. Yeah, it's very and and

(01:12:41):
and reading south Saldasian. The firstquestion comes, Oh you're so you're suald
aition. So so how are youout of the way you are out?
Yeah, I just told the sameway the way you talk. Oh how
was it? How was it staved? Will be play anybody else? Probably

(01:13:04):
much better? It was. Itwas su saving. But how can I
see aything else? Right? Right? You know? I I I hear
you know um And it's in thepart it's in the messaging and both actually
all the parties that I can watch, all the texting and comments. It's

(01:13:25):
like, you know, it's toughto um assume that the relationships that we
look at her that we want areum based on sex, because in the
gay community, for years, that'swhat it was based on. I mean,
that's all you ever felt or heardwas everything was like, oh,
it's about the sex. It's aboutthe sex. And I'm going to tell
you that there's still a big,heavy generation of people out there that they

(01:13:49):
don't care about the rest of it. All they care about is getting their
rocks off. They don't care aboutthe rest of it. You know,
and you know they don't understand that, you know what, Like we were
reading, I was reading off thosethose things about having monogamy as a relationship,
but there are some benefits to that. And the number fourth one I

(01:14:10):
believe was the fact is that ifyou have a relationship, a monogamous a
relationship, you don't have to worryabout STDs or AIDS or anything else because
you're with one person. I haven'tworried about it. Being guysn't worried about
it. We don't have to worryabout it because we trust each other fully,
you know. It's it's a nicething because before him, I was

(01:14:30):
scared. I not want to getdiseases. I don't you know, I
don't want to like have to livethis miserable life trying to just buying somebody
to love me and that I canlove that. And now you know,
I don't have to worry about thediseases and that is a very big bonus
and being a monoglous being monogamous.Yes, yes, I got you boom,

(01:14:58):
but you know that's that's like forme. It's like I just you
know, I think you hit thenail on the head when you said that
us single guys that are looking fora monogamous relationship. We're just looking for
somebody to love us, and that'sit. Love us for who we are,
and we let you in, thenlet us in and if you let
it become what it is, thenyou won't need to go anywhere else.

(01:15:21):
But shaming us for it in thegay community, our own people, that
is bullshit. It is absolute crazythat anybody would give a crap. I
mean, I don't understand why yougot to judge anybody else, but you
can't judge us up. You know, we have you know what, We
were judged by our parents, wewere judged by our peers, were judged

(01:15:44):
by We don't need the gay communityto judge us as well. But yet
it's happening exactly. This is wherewe should be free to be ourselves is
in the gay community because that's whatwe are and we shouldn't have to be
judged for being us. Lying.You know, that's people. You know,
I think somebody put a statement outone day and said, you know

(01:16:08):
what, I hate people, Andfrom that day on, I've always I
always thought, you know what,that person's upset, right, because people
are the ones I mean, wetear each other down so much. Very
rarely do we pick the other personup. We always tear him down.
Very rarely do we pick him up. Yeah, And as gays, we

(01:16:30):
should pick each other up. Weshould be we should be picking up everybody.
Never put each other anymore because lookat all we've had, you lived
or to time, who we aretoday, right, you know, And
like the younger ones have it madecompared to my growing up and trs Teddy,

(01:16:50):
you know, it's like, really, I'm so jealous of the younger
group because it was hell yeah thereare yeah, and it was burnt back
in the day before our generation.Yeah, it was not an easy road

(01:17:11):
to home. It wasn't And livingin a small town and coming out gay
when you're fourteen and in the seventiesand eighties, it wasn't easy. Even
if there wasn't a small town,you know, it's still hard to become
still in the city still wherever youare at that point, Yeah, I
mean in some countries still don't allowyou to be who you are people because

(01:17:33):
yeah, yeah, Aaron mine mine. One time I was put in jail
because I was holding another guy's head. He was stilling my boyfriend. We
were just holding hands and the policetook us. And then when I called
my dad, I mean I waslike nineteen already, but I was like,

(01:17:56):
yeah, they called us doing drugs? Can you come pick? Maybe
if I told him, but Iwas really doing, which was holy hands
of her person with a penis.He will flip out when and when I
told him, he was like allyour young generation. I'm like, I'm
safe. But even now here,it's illegal to marry another man, at

(01:18:20):
least in my city. So it'slegal where I am. So moved moved
to New York, Karen. Yeah, especially with the president that you have,
He's making it real easy. I'mstill Mexican, you know. So
she's now into Canada. It's legal, right, yeah, absolutely, yeah,

(01:18:45):
I think you got I thought Canada. I thought Canada it was legal
there before it was in the end, I believe, yeah, yeah,
yes, yes, yeah, it'sforever now. But now you've find like,
do you go out to I'm surethere's Toronto and all that's got a
lot of gay clubs. Do youfind do you find that as well?

(01:19:06):
I mean not just that that thereis still a lot of these queens that
are looking for that perfect bodied mailthat you know whatever, and you feel
like you're being pushed aside. Imean is that? Oh? Absolutely,
because if you if you're going anapp like grind grind, Oh my god,
yeah. Yeah. For example,where you see all these uh stereotypes

(01:19:30):
always always there, they would wantto have somebody did always look into uh
these body stereotypes. Also if andthen if if you go to the bars,
which we have unpermitted bars here,you would still notice that if you
stand there and if you're not ifyou're not the choose type, if if

(01:19:50):
you don't have six backs or cutjaw line or groomed you know, very
very amazingly, you would not getcan you attention that? That? Otherwise
somebody would get if they're very youknow, uh god, I hate that.

(01:20:11):
Okay. Body standing. Body standingin the community is a very widespread
topic, and it's it's just thatnow we have these different different uh you
know sections like we have we havepeople who who just want you know,
muscle bodies or or orbing things.And then we have the very community which
is there again to to celebrate peoplewho have larger bodies and people who want

(01:20:35):
men with larger bodies. So Iguess we are very just right. We're
all now finding our own zones tobe in and be happy with, which
should rob the case. We shouldbe happy in in a very open environment.
But that doesn't happen. Yes,um also so but but but coming

(01:20:56):
to monogamy, I think we shouldunderstand that nowadays, with the evolving nature
of the society and anti people andand the you know, the whole revolution
with the internet, we have weeither have um, you know, emotional
monogamy and we have sexual mona So. So, emotional monogamy is when you

(01:21:19):
are when you are emotionally just witheach other, but but you're open to
like you have an open relationship andso and then and then there are sexual
monogamy, in which you then areonly with with the person you're with,
like like Tyn Cabin for example.So and so, so we do see

(01:21:41):
a lot of cases of emotional monogamythen sexual monogamy because people because again because
we are we are at we're we'rea hormone driven species. We we want
to have a lot of sex,we want to explore more. So that's
why the the emotional monogomy part isnow is now it's becoming more popular than

(01:22:05):
the sectional anogamy part uh, andthen they justify that by saying that,
let's not fall into the heteronormative.Uh, you know, construct of what
they do matter. It should beauto relations should be you don't have to
be to be sexually monogomous to belognousfor someone who works for someone like me,

(01:22:28):
it won't work. So it's it'sokay. So I see a lot
of couples who are monogamous, butthey're emotionally monogymous, So that right,
you know, you someone else,So I understand that the great yeah yeh,

(01:22:50):
yes, well yes, but buttake him back with what he said
about we are STI type people.I think that has a big impact when
it comes to relationships not lasting,because I mean, you can go to
the to the bar and you seethis guy that you're into, I mean,

(01:23:10):
whatever you're into, but just seethis guy that feels all the boxes
and you your brain instantly thinks,oh my god, he might be the
one. Without you actually engaging ina conversation, you just think he's the
one because he physically feels you know, a list of characteristics that you want,
and then you see him you bothpresent the best uh version of yourself.

(01:23:35):
You get together after one month andafter six months you realize he's a
real dutch bag. But then it'slike I think that comment that people are
like, you know, thinking,oh, just because he's handsome, just
because I like him physically, hehas to be a great guy. And
it doesn't work like that. Notlike that's the infatuation, right right,

(01:24:01):
that's no strong mind. Understand alot of people do understand that you've got
to change. Well, you're growingtogether as a couple. You should change
for each other, you know,and check each other because I don't always

(01:24:21):
know that he you know, ifI'm coming off the teen and so I'm
like, babe, if I comeoff fifteen and you know, just check
me. Yeah, it's fair,it's not amount, you know. But
I think that's another part that's reallyhelped us out. His favorite words to
sayer, are you going to?Or I? It does and she snapped

(01:24:49):
two. So there's this stereotype rightthere. But you know, we we
do that to ourselves, I mean, and that's some of the stuff that
has to change, you know.I mean, we stereotype each other because
I think maybe it's because the gaycommunity is still young. Maybe it's to

(01:25:15):
where we're still trying to find ourfooting. Maybe, I mean, we
are insecure about ourselves no matter whatsize we are, what we look like.
We're always saying, maybe I'm notgood enough or that person is not
good enough for me, And maybewe need to see past some of this
stuff and say, you know what, like Aaron, like, if you're

(01:25:36):
having you know, you're in abar and you see a guy that you
think you know fitch your box,that you check off all the points and
he seems to be your type,go over and have a conversation. You
might know right off the bat he'sa douchebag, like he said, instead
of waiting six months down their own. But it's not always about looks.
It's also about I mean, Iknow that when I'm looking at a person,

(01:25:58):
it takes me a long time.It becomes friends with them first,
I feel them out by you know, Hey, let's go have coffee.
This is what I'm doing this week. Do you want to join me?
Do you want to do this?Do you want to do that? It
gives you time to grow and toactually see if you if you work,

(01:26:19):
And you should also understand that changeis constant. We are always changing as
individuals every year as we grow,we're all the states the person that we
were when we were twenty or thirty. So remember change all the time.
So so when when we're together ina relationship, monogamous relationship, we are

(01:26:39):
able to have to tackle that changeand navigate that change and still be together.
If you understand that concept that changeis going to happen, but we
still we will appreciate that change andwork with that change, then you will
have worked together as individuals in arelationship. If if we can't handle that
change, you cannot handle. Yeah. I love the fact that we have

(01:27:03):
been able to sit here and talkabout this stuff. You're all very informational,
and we're all talking about what's inour hearts, you know, in
our hearts, and what we feel. And it's because being single, like
Aaron, how long you've been single? Now? Two years? Two years?
She's how long you've been single?Forever? And I think, no,

(01:27:26):
seriously, a long time? Ohyeah, A lot of times because
Yeah usually goes all about education andthe three years and all that. So
once it was done, then none, let's enter into it and then nothing
else. Well, for me,for me, it's been it's been a
good twenty years, okay, Andit's because of so many different factors.

(01:27:50):
But I can tell you that whenwe can sit down on a platform like
this and talk about how we feeland what we're looking for and what we
don't like, what we like andso on and so forth, this opens
up doorways for all of us,you know what I mean. And this
this should be happening with more morepeople, a lot more people. Totally.

(01:28:16):
We need to have teachers so wecan guide other people see the right
path, and we to create createthis conversation and and and dialogue and get
this rolling that people are more involvedand then bring out more ideas and more
constance and share more experiences of becausethere's more acceptance. That way, you

(01:28:40):
end up with more acceptance, rightright, right, Aaron, can we
we'll see something? Yeah, Iwas saying something. Oh no, I
was saying that if you let otherpeople know what you're going through, they
will they will feel so lowly aboutIt's like realizing that a lot of people

(01:29:03):
look for the same stuff. Youdon't have to be quiet about it.
We can just share and share environmentand teach. Well, that's why,
that's why, there's that's why itlike we talk with Teddy. That's why
we have these subjects. We bringin people that have a story that had

(01:29:23):
something happened to them and we liketo share it so that other people know
what they've gone through. It helpsus evolve, It helps us understand,
you know. And even though talkwith Teddy is normally just a riot and
a bunch of laughing and all thatother stuff, which is normally that way.
It's like when I first put thispost out about okay, when I

(01:29:44):
put us like, yeah, we'regoing to talk about gay monogamous love,
you know, I had to puton there yes, a serious topic,
because if I didn't, people aregonna go, oh, yeah, what's
this going to be about? Youknow, It's the fact this is that
I am a gay man. I'mfifty three years old. I've been saying
go for twenty years, and I'msick and tired of being single, and
I'm sick and tired of trying tofigure out what I'm doing wrong. And

(01:30:05):
the only way that's going to happenis by talking with other people that are
out there. That's the only waywe're gonna learn this. To hear,
what do you know you've got somebodyfor fourteen year bitch, just sit there
and LEAs. It's a word thepeople like you and Kevin, So it

(01:30:26):
should be social pioneers, you know, to help people understand. And that's
why I'm here. Yeah, weI brought them on so that they could
help us understand what they what theyhave gone through. Really more confused than
I was before. Oh stop,you're going to be confused. You're gonna

(01:30:57):
be confused by but you would probablybe there you go, there you go.
That's that's more important. Confidence killsthe game. Well, think about
where all of us are at thispoint. I'm in New York, Errands
in Mexico. Uh, t Royand Kevin, you're in Missouri, Missouri,
and Shesha's in Canada, and soit's Toronto. So it's like,

(01:31:20):
you know, we're all from verylong distances from each other. Yeah,
well yeah, I mean I'm inAmerica, but I'm in New York,
but you know from you, Yeah, but I mean Toronto and New York
isn't that far a couple of hours, but still it's it's enough to where

(01:31:41):
we all know that we have hadsituations and it's it's out there. I
mean, I did not realize howmuch. Um, I'm going to use
the word crap because that's the onlything that's in my mind that that with
this whole thing in the gay communityof how much shaming and how much the

(01:32:05):
gay community really just puts each otherdown because they're different from each other when
they should be bonding and you know, accepting the differences and saying, hey,
I got your back. You know, that's it's so weird. You
know, when when we started outbeing gay and coming out of the closet,

(01:32:25):
I would never thought in a millionyears that we would be so separated.
To be honest with you, Imean, that's the whole reason.
I mean, right, you're feeling, I mean that makes that easier.
It doesn't that it is more hardbecause then you're okay, now this is
unknown. What right? There's acomment here, um from Kerry and I

(01:32:45):
want to reach She says, Okay, I'm just getting on and just skimming
through comments. I can tell youthat as a straight by curious woman that
if relationships were based on sex,I would have been divorced years ago.
I've been married almost thirty years,and in the past ten years I've had
intercourse maybe twice so we need tolook past the bedroom and into what is

(01:33:13):
inside, not outside. If youare attracted to someone, it's not because
you want to just have sex withhim. It's the connection, whether it
be female female male male, andso on and so forth down the line.
Yeah, yeah, it's true,John. I mean, even though
we all do look at I meanwe know what we what we want,

(01:33:35):
we know what we look at.If I see a good looking man in
the bar, he might be tooskinny for me, but I'm at least
going to say he's a good lookingman. Do I want to have sex
with him? Not necessarily, youknow what I'm saying. It's just he's
a good looking man. But I'mnot going to kick him out of bed
free and crackers either. So Imean it's one of those things that if
I had the opportunity, Hey hewants a relationship, Yeah, but if

(01:33:58):
it's just a one night stand,I'm not into that. It's more about
what's well, thank god, I'mnot in your bed and I don't eat
crackers. We're telling our all thetime. Yeah, wake up with a

(01:34:23):
mouse in your bed with you?I don't know, but I mean Aaron
like in Mexico, we've discussed rightfrom the beginning of how difficult it is
for you, you know, especiallybecause of you know, coming out not
too long ago too, I meanhaving being in a in a um a
situation where it's still not acceptable,you know, And I hope you're still

(01:34:49):
there because you froze on me.Yeah you're there, um, but it's
it's um but at least, butat least you know that you're not alone,
that there are people that you canreach out to. And Hey,
you ever want to come to NewYork and visit, You're welcome, and

(01:35:09):
I'm sure Missouri is the same way, and so as Toronto you're always welcome
to visit. Yeah. The thing, the only the only place I have
never been was it's Missouri. SoI won't put them on top because I've
been to Toronto. It's so muchfun. It's it's amazing. Everyone's so

(01:35:31):
friendly in Toronto. And this policemanhelped me get back to my hotel because
being pretty, I'm stupid too,so I got lost. So you're not
from here, but now Toronto it'samazing. You you're it's amazing. But
I bet Missouri it's amazing. Butso far, I don't think any planes

(01:35:54):
from Mexico play there, but there'salways a way. I'm going to Missouri
too, so we might as welljust look up and go. We'll just
go together. Yeah, I'm gonnago visit. So was very very very
country, very different. Yes,you're always you know you've been there?
She she've been. Yeah, Yeah, I've never been there. I am

(01:36:16):
an unabashedly in collegially in love withNew York like a childhood It's like a
childhood love which which began with homealone New York City or the New York
the state, New York City,New York City, and like it's it's
it's been there. All the romanticmovies have spoiled me. Yeah, I've

(01:36:45):
been there. I'm no desire togo back. He'll tell me it's I
love it, I know, Imean, I mean, I love Manhattan.
I go there for work all thetime. I just enjoy that the
place again, I love because it'sthere, which nice. I just I

(01:37:08):
just see that. There was aaronwhen you were talking about getting arrested for
holding hands with someone. There's acomment here it says, uh, Angela
signed says, my dad hates itwhen I hold hands with someone who has
a penis too and Aaron Froze,let you go literally, Uh no,

(01:37:35):
I mean I could see why.Yeah yeah, yeah, I mean parents,
let us let us experience all that. I mean, I know they're
just trying to take care of ofbut you know, sometimes we know better,
you know. My first my firstexperience with another man, with another

(01:37:59):
male. I should say that becauseI was young with a male, because
I was a little boy and sois He was, Oh my god,
probably ten years old, and itwas under the stairs to a trailer that
we lived in. We hid underneaththe stairs, the steps, underneath the
porch, the batio, whatever youwant to call it. That was my

(01:38:21):
first experience. Oh wow, yeah, god, so fucking long ago.
Dirt was young, younger? Yeahyeah, it was probably ten. Ye,

(01:38:43):
that's probably ten. That was myfirst experience at ten, I think,
oh wow, if not younger,but I'm thinking ten though. Yeah.
Yeah, my first experience with becauseI have been with a woman,
um you have. I mean,I did experiment, you know. It
was one of those things people allbeen there. I think I was.

(01:39:05):
I think I was like twenty two, twenty three. I think, oh
yeah, that came a lot later. In life. It took it took
twelve years to find the courage.Just like man, I do not want
to go in there. Nothing thatbad. No, no, it wasn't

(01:39:33):
that bad. And don't you gowith that, honey, it's that bad.
It's not that bad. It's justnot for me, you know,
it's just not Yeah, yeah,I mean, hey, if you want
to eat anyway, if you wantto lick rug, you go for it.
That's all you want, not me, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

(01:40:00):
Some like both. Some like bothvalleys and on mountains. I love it
the way she's putting bailies and mountains. I'm gonna use that failies and mountains.
I want to go down the valley. You go down the valley.
Fine, whatever. If I everhave a clean show, it'll be mountains

(01:40:21):
and failies. I'm Canadian, beennice people. I'm much. You got
a book right, you're writing thisall down right, Eric. I don't
know how to write because I'm fromMexico and we never learned that. But

(01:40:43):
I good. You never learned howto write in Mexico. That's a nice
country. Come on, just comedown you all love Come on. Of
course the gate spot it's but itdoesn't look like the rest of Mexico.

(01:41:08):
Trust, Okay, So I gothere all the time. I oh,
I'm going to here. I gotthere like every year. It's yeah,
it's it's perfect. I'm the I'mthe only one that's not a bear.
Okay, I better, I'm okay. It's fun. You have your you

(01:41:30):
have you have your market. Nobodycan I get reaction to that market because
I have no idea where it isuns anybody have their market. Trust you
have a market. Mine spend closedfor thirty years. Mine spent closed for

(01:41:55):
thirty years. There is no marketfor me. Open the shutters now to
sign this is open. Yeah,well you and I next year. I've

(01:42:15):
never been. I've never been.Hey, I'm a poor country boy.
I live out. I live outin the middle of nowhere. I have
more cows than people like I said, I am not a rich man by
any means. So that's it's cheaper. I mean, I've been to the
States and I know, like fifteendollars for a drink. It's just a

(01:42:39):
stupid Come to Mexico and they're likea dollar for a drink. So I
used the party and al Passo whenI stayed there, we could go across
to the Mexican border and get tequilashots for twenty five cents. That was
back in the day, and thentoday you can't. They're like five box.

(01:43:00):
So that was a long time ago. If you go into border.
Yeah, but in part to trustme, it's expensive to get here because
of the play ticket. But onceyou're here it's super. I mean for
you guys, not for me.For me, well, it's it's not
very cheap. I will say,your money gets far away because it's not

(01:43:24):
cheap for US Mexicans because no,it's no, not super for people who
fly in from data or are candidate. It's so so yeah, you get,
you get for your money. Yeah. When I was in a lot
of value. When I was in, my dream was to save thousand dollars.

(01:43:49):
That's my dream behind obviously. Wellbut you found love. Yeah,
you get something we don't have.Okay, So Teddy, next time you
want to that, I want tocome to beef Tip. Okay, sorry,

(01:44:10):
did you have the problemstown come drinkson me? What was did you
say? Beef Tip? Yeah?So beef Tip Isn't is an annual bear
event in in in sing Sing Way. It is in in Provincetown and in
problem Town you have the bear bearweek right, So problems. I mean

(01:44:35):
I like to go because they havelike a lot of evans, uh,
And I like birds. I meanthey don't like me back, but it's
still fun to stay. I letyou know that. Yeah, I don't
trust me to see birds, butlike you knows, a like actual birds
like in a story. Oh herewe go here there is a comment good

(01:45:02):
morning from South Africa. Great showyou guys. From my experience, as
I have mentioned on the Facebook group, I am blind with only one eye.
I don't have a prosthetic eye.This deer's people and it's just a
goin to move closer. And it'sjust clear that gay men are so focused
on the model appearance, the guythat is skinny or masculine or muscular,

(01:45:27):
that has a normal appearance and notwith a clear shortage or shortcomings of a
kind. I have been on TenderGrowler and Scruff and always looking for friendship
and the result has always been thesame. So yeah, appearance has always
been a problem in the gay community. And if you're different in any way,
shape or form, you do getyou know, but you know what

(01:45:49):
I'll be honest with you. Iget that on the straight side too.
I mean, you know, Iyeah, it's everywhere. I mean,
I don't. I don't walk aroundlike I'm where I live. There's a
lot of people that don't know I'mgay unless I tell them I'm gay.
Okay, I don't. I donot. I do not pronounce that.

(01:46:10):
You know. I don't go outand you know, carry a flag on
my back, a gay pride flag. If somebody asked me, if somebody
comes up and has the you know, the balls to say, hey,
are you gay, I would beI would have the balls back to say
yes, I am. But Iwould never just openly volunteer that information.

(01:46:31):
And some people say that's probably partof my problem and why I'm still single,
because I don't let people know thatI am. You know, that
can be very well, because youknow other people don't think you're gay,
then maybe some days. How manypeople you know, especially that are married

(01:46:54):
right now with kids that think they'restraight and then by the time they turn
thirty five, forty years old,they come out gay. There's a lot
of those two Yeah, yeah,many, many, many fucking errand is
fucking those again with a big smile. Oh she's earlier. He was sleeping.

(01:47:15):
It looked like now he was smiling, just perpetual smile, perpetual.
Yeah. Well, Josh, Josh, this is to the chat from Josh.
We do understand. I mean,we've been talking about monogamous relationships all

(01:47:35):
night long and how we look andwhy we get judged by people of our
own club, if that's what youwant to call it. I mean,
and uh and and it shouldn't behappening. Some of us are old enough
to have helped lay the roadway forthis gener generation. I mean, I've
been beaten up. I've had tohide who I've been for a long time,

(01:47:58):
and I've you know, into basically, you know, decide and send
him on two feet and say,you know what I've done hiding, Because
whether I was hiding or not,I was still getting beaten up. So
from that point on, I justhad to say, you know what,
this is who I am. Dealwith it, deal with it. You
know, That's what I had toget away from Naboleon, the beasts just

(01:48:23):
crap growing up because I got alot to live in a small town and
I can't even walk down my doorwithout being harassed, like to walk away
from the store, I would beharassed the whole way. I'd be a
hors and I'm away. You know, I got to do the point.
I don't give a shitty. Iam, you know I am. I

(01:48:45):
wear this every day in my freakingline. I don't give a shit because
I'm tired of not being myself.I'm tired. I was seeing other people
have to hide who they are andnot find that love because we're hide I've
seen that so much. And youknow, why should we have to hide?

(01:49:06):
Yeah, we shouldn't have to hide. And we're gonna get beat up
whether we hide or not. Imean, we we have to be who
we are and and to be tobe you know, uh, shunned or
talked down to, or ignored ormade to be picked down or bullied by
our own people. You know,the gay community to me is just plain

(01:49:28):
bullshit. It's the you know,a period, you know, and as
Aaron has said that they're just bullies. That's all they have. They're bullies,
bullies. So but you know,guys, um we are. We've
usually ran our time. It's freakingamazing. I've had such a good time

(01:49:50):
talking with you guys, talking toyou, I am so happy that I
got them because you know, Ijust I just love where you are and
I had no idea exactly how itwas there and for you to get on
here and let me know, Ithink that. And I feel that Aaron

(01:50:15):
is awesome as well, because youknow, you're in Mexico and I had
no idea how Mexico, because Ilive in tall Town, and you both
have like totally put stuff in myhead that I didn't even know before you
hand, and I think, yougo, you taught me something. Well,
thanks thanks to you to you give. But things getting work out in

(01:50:39):
the future, and you can tellwhich all the best. And I hope
I know for a fact that you'reall You're gonna find that special person,
thank you, and they're gonna fallin love with you. Thanks, And
you ain't gonna have to worry aboutit anymore. Yourself, think about yourself,

(01:51:00):
do something for yourself. Don't worryabout that ship. Let it come
to you, don't worry about it. I know it's hard, it's not
easy not having to worry about somethingthat is so on you, but you
can do it. Yeah, I'malways told, I was always told work
on yourselves and when love comes,it will finding when it's supposed to.

(01:51:25):
Well, they better hurry because whenI turn eighty, I'm not marrying no
bitches. Then yeah, he's theonly one I've ever gonna marry. My
takeaway message or my misters to altoall is just be be secure about yourselves.
Love yourself. Try to be asemotionally secure as you can, because

(01:51:47):
once you're secure, you will beable to get to give that emotional security
to somebody else and which will reflectand transtate in your relationships. So I
facts that will another blur disas I'ma unique confident person. I hope everybody
else doesn't step. We should behappy, but that's right, we should.

(01:52:11):
We should. It was, itwas amazing. I learned a lot
from your country some places, Andyeah, I think if you're some are
your work on your best version ofyourself. Uh, someone will not this
and like that. I mean arelationship. It's not looking your own house,
it's sharing a full self. Soif you're you know, fully happy

(01:52:33):
with who you are, someone youknow would like to share that happiness.
So just work on yourself. Yeah, well, I would love for all
of us to come back together againat some point on here and just sure,
you know, chat and talk andI think it would be great to
have everybody back at some point.Absolutely, you know, we did have

(01:52:56):
Greg here and I do want tosay you know he was here as well,
but he had to leave because ofgoing to work early. But you
know, it's been a wonderful nightand I really appreciate all of you guys
coming here and spending the time withus, and you know, for whoever
long it's been just to just togive your ideas and points and and share
your heart with us. I mean, it's just it's one of those things.

(01:53:19):
But I'm not going to get tooserious because Talk with Teddy's not a
serious show. So um, butum, I do I want to say,
I want to say one more thinghere Josh rex Um the gentleman from
South Africa. But absolutely I amsorry you guys had to experience this.

(01:53:40):
We go to prides and fight forfreedoms and acceptance, yet it seems like
we can't practice what we preach.It always it's always a bitch fight under
the queens and everybody's dissing each other. Where's the love and the acceptance.
It's like everything is just a fakething and a way to find a hook
up at prides. That happens alot. I know queens that talk about

(01:54:03):
that as well, and they're lookingfor monogamous relationships as well. You know
it's there. We're all different,but we there are a big load of
us that want monogamous relationship. Wewant one person. That's it. We
don't want to share. I knowyou're out there lover, future lover or
whatever. If you can't love yourself, how they Yeah, where did you

(01:54:33):
get that from? Where did youget that from? There? You go,
Oh my gosh, it was great. That was awesome. All right,

(01:54:54):
everybody Thursday night, Um, it'sgonna be fun here and Talk with
Teddy. I have a band that'sactually gonna come play for us live on
Talk with Teddy on Thursday night.And their music is a little different,
but you know what, so amI. So we're just gonna have a
good time. So hopefully y'all willcome and join us. Then, guys,
thank you so much for joining uson the watch parties and putting in

(01:55:15):
all your comments and and and puttingup with us. We are a good
bunch of people. But we're goodpeople. And uh, and that's all
talked with Teddy Has as good people. And I'll have to shoot you now
or my Facebook so that the wayas you because iCal, you're awesome,
you're beautiful. Yeah, yes,yes, and it's always a pleasure,

(01:55:41):
yeah, pain, pleasure all right, and have a good night. Thank
you too, Yeah, good too, thank you? All right, guys,
don't forget take care of your neighborsas well as yourself, because everybody's
important. Yes, oh yeah,

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E071 -Talk with Teddy - Gay Monogamous Relationship, do they exists_

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