July 16, 2025 • 39 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Oh, hello, Hi everyone, Welcome to the premium episode this week.
So this is gonna be different. I tried to record
this episode I don't know, probably six times, and every
time I started recording it. This happens every once a while,
I got to a point where I was like, this
is fucking terrible, so I just stop it and started
(00:20):
over and then at one kind of stock. But I
wanted to show you guys what the process is like
this week, so I will be leaving in all the
starts and stops. I'll edit them down a little bit,
but eventually I'm going to talk to my friend Peyton Witmore,
and eventually I'm gonna get into some interesting stuff. But
(00:43):
it's gonna take a little while. But I wanted to
give you a peek behind the curtain of how annoying
and lame I can be. So enjoy and I hope
you feel my pain a little bit while you listen
to me starting and stopping. But I do this because
(01:05):
you know, I want to have a good podcast, a
good premium podcast. I feel like I used up all
my real energy today recording the free one. So I
think from now on what I'm gonna do is I'm
gonna record the premium episode first and then record the
free episode. I think that makes sense. It's a learning curve, guys.
(01:27):
I'm doing some different shit now. Thank you for being phasian.
You guys are fucking so sick. I promise next week
will be, you know, a little bit of normal, a
little bit more normal. I can't talk today too. I
must be having a stroke, that's all I can assume.
I think I'm either losing my mind or I'm just
(01:48):
rapidly approaching, just stroking out, stroking out. So, without further ado,
here is the clusterfuck that was recording this week episode.
You guys are rad Thank you for subscribing. Oh hello everyone, Hi,
(02:24):
how are you? It's Grant. This is your first week
subscribe to the premium Terrible Person feed. Thank you so much.
Just to let you know we do. I said we
would do three, three a month, So I'm considering this
the third episode. Even though I'm putting it up, I
just have a feeling this is going to be bad.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Oh hello, Hi everyone, welcome back to the premium version
of Terrible Person How to Become a Terrible Person.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Hi, I'm Grant. I don't know if I just said
that it's been a day. I've had a day since
I recorded the free episode this morning, and fuck man,
so many things have happened, insomuch as I've edited the
episode today and done a bunch of chores around the house,
nothing too crazy. I just went to uh one more time.
(03:34):
The third time is a charm, I'm saying. I'm thinking,
we'll see. This is the third time I've started to
record the premium podcast. Hope this one sticks. We'll see.
I don't know. I'm a little gassed, a little tired,
a big day. I just spent the last hour outside
cleaning my car. Took it to one of those self
service car wash use I left it was car washes,
(03:59):
left it. Uh jesus, I can't fucking talk right now.
It's it's four o'clock. I recorded the first episode, like
what nine thirty, and now I've evolved into no recognizable
language or speech patterns. Just an idiot. But anyway, what
I was saying is I went to one of those
self service car washes, the one where you get to shit,
(04:19):
hold your own nozzle, that sort of thing. I love those.
There's not that many of them anymore, they don't exist.
And this one I really like, because it's got the blower,
so at the end you can wow, you guys know
what a fucking blower sounds like. Anyway, was there and
I pulled in. Well technically yeah, okay. So I pulled
in and got the port I wanted, and they take
(04:42):
debit cards. So I was like, fuck, yah, I slide
my card rejected, declined nothing, no dice, no water. So
I'm like, fuck, try a couple more times. It's not going.
There's people around me washing their cars. So one of
the stalls down. The thing opens up and it's got
a different type of reader. So I'm like, maybe this
will work. Pull my car in there and move my floormats,
(05:03):
all this stuff. Swipe the car and nothing. Swipe it again, nothing.
Then fuck man, I try. I walk down to another
one slide my car. None of them wor can. So finally,
out of just pure anger and frustration, I go to
where my car's parked. I just keep swiping it up
and down super fast. I don't know. I probably did
it for about twenty seconds and then it's a card
(05:23):
accept it. I was like, fuck, yeah, my car was
really dirty. This is a really bad podcast. I think
today might be the week off. Yeah, I don't. All right,
fuck it, we're doing it. I yeah, Hello, Hi, Hello, Hi,
how are you? What's up? It's a premium episode. Listen, man,
(05:48):
I've tried to record this fucking thing four times again,
and then I realized I'm like five minutes in. I'm like,
I'm bored boring myself. So I decided to do something
different and this is maybe this episode may be for you,
may not be for you. Hello everyone, Hi, welcome back.
(06:12):
This is the second episode I've recorded today.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
This.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
You know, obviously this was a bad idea. If you
just listen to the free episode and you're you're in
this episode, it's it's a bad idea to do two
of these one day by myself. I think I gotta
split it up. Oh Hello, Happy Friday everyone. This is
(06:38):
Grant round two of recording today. If you're listening to this,
I'm recording this Friday afternoon, September thirtieth. It is four
oh seven pm. Not that it matters, not that anyone
gives a shit, but that's just what time it is.
So welcome. If this is your first week subscribe to
the Premium podcast. It's gonna be a little different this week.
I'm just gonna let you know. I'm just gonna I'm
(07:02):
gonna start an episode of a television show and I'm
gonna provide commentary for it while also doing the premium
episode of the podcast. Now you're probably wondering, Grant, why
are you doing this? And I'm gonna tell you because
I don't really want to do a premium episode right now.
I kind of do, kind of don't, but I'm out
of energy. My back hurts. I watched my Car today.
(07:22):
I'll get into all those free episode was good this week?
This is bad? Ah fuck this dumb shit. I don't
want to record right now. Uh huh yes, Hello, Hello, Hello, guys.
(07:50):
I wanted to I've started this episode fucking five times.
This is the last time I'm starting it. I've had
Jeffrey Dahmer on on the TV and I'm just gonna
let the audio roll through. Who gives a shit? So Hello,
Hi everyone, how are you? This is Grant. I'm back
at it. I'm trying to turn on the music, but
(08:12):
there we go. What's up? So I'm kind of out
of steam. I'm not gonna lee to you, guys. It's
four o'clock on a Friday, it's been a long week.
I just got done doing some automotive shit. Big car guy.
Guys went to all Riley Auto Parts. You've got zero
customer service. That should be a big part of their
(08:33):
fucking advertising campaign. We will not ask you a single
question when you walk in the door. Don't worry. We
won't bother you, won't let you make your own bad decisions.
And then when you bring it back later, we'll give
you a hard time every time. Yeah, I always buy
the wrong thing and then I have to bring it
back and they're like, well, why didn't you fucking ask us? Like,
where where were you guys? Whoa the hell's going on here? Okay,
(08:55):
so I just to set the scene, paint the picture.
I'm back in the den, sitting at my computer. I've
got a beautiful eighteen pound Touxedo cat. If she's not
eighteen pounds, she lost a bunch of weights. She's like
more like thirteen now, little bowling ball, she's a sizable
bowling ball. I don't even know if I was going bowling,
I don't think i'd pick a thirteen pound ball. What
(09:16):
is the point? Why do you pick what's never understood that?
Why wouldn't you want the lightest ball that you can
whip the hardest. Why do you want a heavy bowllying ball.
Let's look at this. Let's in general, the heavier the
bowling ball will be the better as a heavy ball.
(09:40):
What the fuck who wrote this? Well, I'm they'll carry
more power and they will have more chances of hooking
than a lightweight ball. That's very interesting. I used to
go bowling all the time. My dad apparently used to.
His dad used to own a bowling alley, so he's
really good at bowling. He's like one of those guys
that he'll bowl once a year and he'll bowl like
a two sec. Jesus dude. He's like what I like
(10:03):
to play. He's like Garth and Wayne's World in that
movie Wayne's World. I don't know if you guys have
ever heard of it, Wayne's World two when he does
a drum solo and then he goes I like to play.
That's my dad when he's bowling. I was never that
good at it. I just like to go and drink
a lot of beer. That was a good first first
date spot in Indiana. I feel like go bowling because
(10:26):
no one's a I guess it's cool, because then you're
kind of showing the person you're dating or people you're
with that, hey, you know, I don't care. I don't
care if you think I'm cool because I'm not good
at this. You know that's my And then also you
can get blackout drunk and then just wake up outside
the bowling alley. I know, I wanted to talk about
(10:48):
Justin Bieber and Haley Bieber and all that bullshit, but
who cares? Everybody Like, I still I'm still mad about
Justin Bieber canceling his tour. I wonder if canceling is
too and all this stuff in the Hailey Bieber interview
is related, like, because everyone's saying this this Hailey Bieber interview,
this call Her Daddy interview. I don't have any sound,
(11:09):
I don't have any examples of what she said particularly,
but what it was is she was saying that she
wasn't with Justin while Justin was with Selena. And apparently
Selena Gomez has a documentary coming out that's gonna blow
the roof off of things, and they think maybe this
is preemptive damage control to all of this. I say,
(11:31):
I don't fucking care, and I'm telling you guys this
and I'm saying I don't care, and I think I'm
just gonna move on, right I'm gonna move on with
my life and the podcast, because there are some really
interesting things happening in the world, like one Facebook. First
of all, metaburse. The metaburse sounds betty betty bad. I
(11:57):
don't want any part of that, Like why would you
want to have a three D version of Facebook? I
don't know. Fuck it, I'm gonna take this week off. Hello,
Hi everyone, Hi, Hi, it's Grant. I think this is
the week that I'm gonna take off this week for
(12:17):
the premium. I gotta be honest with you, guys. I've
sat down and started this recording. This is my sixth time,
and I've had different ideas for what I want to
do tell the stuff. I just have no energy. I
think I might have had a cold this week. I
don't know. I don't want to make excuses. I just
(12:38):
am kind of burned out and I want to do
a full podcast, and I you know, I want to
be fun and engaging. I just don't feel very fun
and engaging right now. Does that ever happened to you, guys?
It's the dumbest fucking podcast. Let's see, dude, I want
(12:58):
to get I want to talk about let's you know,
I had stuff I wanted to talk about. I want
to talk about how people are using Facebook still it's
like a personal diary and oversharing and all that stuff.
I watched someone who I met and am acquaintance with
that worked at a liquor store in Indiana. She had
this full domestic violence craziness with kids and with her house,
(13:20):
getting thrown out of her house, all this shit, and
she posted arguably the most compelling thing I've seen on
Facebook in like ten years. And it was just post
after post after post calling this guy out and tagging
him and you know, saying all this wild abusive shit
that she that he was doing, and then how he
(13:41):
pulled up to her house and had a gun and
they had to call the cops and he was evicted
and then he went to go get his stuff and
blah blah blah. I know this this chick's whole life story.
And then I went and clicked on, you know, his tag,
and then followed the whole story in For every post
that she had, he had one or two just you know,
refuting it. And now here. I am in Arizona on
(14:05):
a Friday, you know, Friday morning, and I'm just captivated
by this awful relationship drama and this, I mean, it
sounds terrible, I think, but I do think there is
something in when these people post on Facebook, there's like
(14:27):
a look at me element and they get sixty five
comments being like, oh girl, you're so strong, You're powerful,
You're you know, ferocious woman, You're whatever Beyonce says about ladies.
You're all those things. And she's like, I try, and
you're just like, how much of this is actually happening?
(14:49):
How much of this is happening inside your head? You know?
And why do you need to involve? She has four
thousand friends, she has near the max friends on her face,
and she's like, I don't know, Like, why do all
your friends need to know this? What is why is
this so important? In fact, I am so out of steam.
(15:12):
I'm gonna call my colleague and hope that she answers
to get her opinion on all this fun stuff. She's
I'm sure she's gonna be busy. I'm calling Peyton Whitmore
from the John Jay and Rich Show. She's like, I'm
going through my contacts and I realized there's a lot
of people I have. Paul Abdul's all her information. I
shouldn't call her. I have Chris Myers from Humphrey's McGhee.
(15:36):
I have a pretty famous country singer in here. I
don't think I should call him. That would not be good.
And also too a lot of these people I have
their phone numbers. I don't talk to him, but I don't.
Is it really worth it to go through and delete
numbers now out of your contacts? I don't think it is.
I don't. I don't think that's an at advantageous use
(15:56):
of what That's not the right This is a bad episode. Hello, Hi, everyone,
Welcome to the premium episode of How To Become a
Terrible Person this week doing something special today, and by
that I mean incredibly lazy. It is four thirty on
the nose right now. Here's what I'm gonna do for
(16:19):
the next half hour, regardless of what happens. No editing.
I also have nothing. I realized the shit that I
wanted to talk about was terribly uninteresting, Like nobody gives
a fuck about Hayley Bieber and Justin Bieber. I mean
if you're fifteen years old, maybe that's acceptable to be,
you know, totally obsessed with. But I just was like,
(16:40):
you know, I've talked a lot about celebrities lately, and
to me, I'm just I'm I'm telling everyone how uninteresting
they are, and then I'm talking about them and I'm like,
that's fucking crazy. What am I doing? That sounds like
I've got, you know, mental issues. If I'm just obsessing
(17:01):
about these people, that fucking drive me crazy. So what
I'm gonna do is I've got a bunch of questions
that were sent into nine one zero five five seven
two eight seven one the text line, and I'm gonna
answer some of those questions and I'm gonna fucking talk
about some shit as I answer the questions. Right. Sounds fun?
Maybe not? Well anyway, thank you for subscribing. Let's fucking
(17:23):
do this. Oh what's up? You guys have no idea
the pain and suffering I've been through so far today
to try and record this premium episode. That's why I've
landed on what I'm doing, which is just whatever happens.
(17:44):
It's a half hour and we'll just we'll see, we'll
see if this is even usable at the end of it.
It might be, it might not be. You might not
get a premium episode this week. It's just the first
thing is I sat down. It was probably three o'clock.
I did a lot of stuff today. I recorded the episode,
the free episode, and then I went and got a haircut.
(18:09):
And let me tell you, great clips. This is not
an ad. It's kind of an ad. I fucking love
great clips. I don't there's no no what is it,
No frills, It's just good old fashioned haircuttery. And sometimes
I just want to go get my haircut and I
don't want to have to sit in a fucking race
(18:30):
car or or football come. I want to go to
sports clips. I also, I hate, hate, hate, hate the
salon scene, especially where we live, which is you know, Arizona, Mace, Arizona, Scottsdale, Arizona.
It's a bunch of just keeping up with the Jones
(18:51):
as shit. You know, people spend way too much money
on haircuts and stuff like that. I called Peyton earlier
when I was recording an episode. I'm gonna call her back,
and I'm just gonna I was talking about how corny
I think oversharing is on Facebook, because there's this chick
that is just blowing up everyone's feet, blowing up everyone's
(19:13):
feet with just the most salacious, hateful, hurtful shit about
her axe and how he's a monster and how he
got them evicted from their place and all this stuff,
and she's got kids and it's so messy and gross,
and the other the other day she posted maybe I
don't know, ten fifteen things like post post, post, this
(19:35):
is what else he did, this is what he does
to me, blah blah blah, And I mean, there's no
there's no like egregious abuse. You know, you're looking at
it and you're like, well, I mean, he didn't fucking
slam your head against the door. He didn't burn your
hand on the oven. You know, he didn't waterboard you
in the bathroom and socking in the stomach. You know,
(19:58):
it's just like, I can't believe he had the you know,
they're they're split up. And she's talking about how he
tells the kids stuff, and I mean, the stuff I
think he tells the kids is probably your mom's fucking crazy,
because by all accounts, she is fucking crazy, and she's
always going to e DM concerts and all this stuff.
(20:19):
And then so so her feed will be, you know,
fifteen posts about uh edm and mac Miller and shit
like that. You know, drug music, fucking druggy music. I think,
I think, let's see that mac miller. Em what else?
What other music? Do people do? Drugs too? It's just
(20:40):
kind of lame. I don't know. I feel like you
take pills and listen to mc millar and you're like,
he's so talented, He's the most talented rapper. Rip him.
And Ariana was an arian Grande that dated mac millar.
One what was she thinking? Too? Okay? Cool? I did
this whole thing about celebrities and Hayley Beaver and Justin
(21:04):
Bieber and I was like, I don't care. So it
kind of lost track of where I was going. But
I guess what I'm trying to say is Facebook has
always been a place for people to overshare, but I
feel like people don't do that anymore. I feel like
it's just kind of one of those things that's passe.
So it's interesting when people do it now. So hold on,
we're calling Peyton. I'm gonna see if I can get
(21:25):
her on the phone. We'll see hello, Hello, is this
Peyton Witmore?
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (21:33):
It's like some dudy named Grant. Maybe.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Yeah, Hey, what's up. I'm recording the podcast and let's
go on. I'm totally out of steam because I just
I was so mad in the first episode. I just
fucking lost my shit and I wanted to ask you.
Do you overshare on Facebook?
Speaker 4 (21:50):
On Facebook? No, on Instagram and Twitter? Probably?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
What do you think about people that overshare on Facebook
like family drama and shit? What does that say about
the person posting.
Speaker 3 (21:59):
It that they need to get over themselves and get
a live Nobody cares?
Speaker 1 (22:04):
Okay, good because I landed. I landed on that conclusion myself,
and I just wanted to make sure a rational person
also felt that way. So what are you doing today?
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (22:15):
Nothing, I'm just hanging out at home and watching my
boyfriend play Madden.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Oh dang, that hot actually hot ass boyfriend of yours
kadem fact that.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
No, I'm going I'm going to my favorite dispensaries customer
Appreciation Day.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
That's where I'm growing today.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
Oh ship, that's tight. What a sticky soorrow.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
Mm hmm that's my place.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Dang, dude, you hooked it up, by the way, this week,
you uh you made friends with sticky tomorrow and they
gave you a bunch of shit and then you passed
it along to me, and I want to I wanted
to tell you with the things you gave me, I
was almost in a coma.
Speaker 4 (22:53):
Oh I am that right?
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I immediately ate them, like within within five minute, it's
leaving the station.
Speaker 4 (23:01):
Are you okay?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (23:03):
I mean, how did you survive that? Well?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
I just I took a lot. I took all of it,
and then I drank a bunch of caffeine and then
I was just like the whole day I was. I
was just stressed out and paranoid, and I was like,
the end of the the end of the world is here. Peyton.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Yeah, that does not sound like a good time. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Well yeah, Peyton, I I don't know what happened, but
I just I was talking about Olivia Wilde and the
celebrities that do that, like they fake stories so people
talk about them, right, Can I can I get your take?
This is I won't I won't keep you. I just
want to hear what your take is on the Haley
Justin Bieber thing. Do you think the uh, the Hailey
(23:40):
Bieber interview? Do you think she was up to something.
Do you think she actually did something to Selena Gomez?
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Like, I mean, yeah, I bet you she was banging
Justin Bieber while he had a girlfriend, Like, it's Justin Bieber,
do you But here's.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
The question, ultimately, Peyton, do you think anyone really cares?
Speaker 4 (24:01):
No, I don't think anybody cares.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
I think that Hayley Baber went on to do damage
control and probably thinks people do care.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
Same with Selena Gomez.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Do you think those those people are going to live
a long time? Like, do you think we're do you
think in twenty five years we're still gonna be like
I wonder what Justin Bieber's doing right now? Or do
you think he's going to be dead?
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Shit, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
The way he's so back and forth with his music
and his career and stuff. He might be gone, but
I'm sure we are going to care because social media
is all take I.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Well, I mean also to that bullshit where he's like
I got to cancel my tour because I have mental
health issues. It's like, dude, no, man, you just didn't
sell any tickets. Probably right, Dick, stop stop talking about
God in your music and get back to that real
sexual justin Bieber. Shit, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (24:50):
Right?
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Well, anyway, Sorry, Peyton. I didn't mean to drag you
into this hole that I'm in, but sorry, Happy Happy Friday.
You got any big, crazy plans this weekend other than
you're at home? What do you have them for dinner tonight?
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Jeez?
Speaker 3 (25:08):
I have no Well I'm having that food truck from
my favorite dispensary, but I think I'm gonna make too
just to have it.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
Damn, I already had spaghetti ones. I need to figure out, Peyton.
My life's falling apart. I don't know what I'm gonna
have for dinner. I don't know what the fun I'm
gonna talk about for the next twenty minutes. So I'm
just royally fucked. Period. Did you hear the queen died?
Speaker 4 (25:28):
Did I?
Speaker 1 (25:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
I think that's old news.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
What I mean, I'm devastated. Yeah, how are all those
high power elite pedophiles gonna get their children?
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Now?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
The queen said? Oh shots firedst Does that? I mean?
Would that shock you? I think it would shock you
to find out that the queen wasn't racist? Yes, exactly?
Well hell yeah, Peyton, Well, hey, I hope you have
a wonderful weekend, and I will see you bright and
early on Monday. Thank you for letting me talk to you.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
Ye wait, dude, of course, talk to you later. Oh.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Also, I have twelve long stem, beautiful long stem roses. Uh,
and I wanted to see if you we could send
those out to a significant other of yours.
Speaker 4 (26:16):
Oh yeah, what's that? Another broke up with me and
tells me that every day?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Oh dang, is this an exclusive kid?
Speaker 4 (26:30):
Yes, she does know.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
How's it? What's the score update in Madden? Who is
he and how's he doing?
Speaker 4 (26:35):
I think he's the Patriots.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
It looks like he's at twenty four to nineteen against
the Cincinnati Bengals.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Geez duh? Well hell yeah? Well bye, Peyton. I hope
you I hope you have a wonderful day.
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Yes you too.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Bye, I mean many blessings, bye bye. All right, that's
my friend Peyton. I work with her. She's a really
nice person. Find her on social me Peyton whitmore so
glad she returned my call and answered, I'm kind of
all over the place like I wanted to talk. I
realized it didn't set up that justin Bieber story had
just got into it with her, but I don't really
think it's that interesting. Let's see here questions to ask
(27:14):
a guy. Somebody just sent me this article. Let's see
what we got here. What's your favorite way to spend
a day off? If I asked a guy that question,
that's me implying that I want to, you know, go
on a rough ride with him at a truck stop.
(27:35):
Never ask a guy what's your favorite way to spend
a day off, especially if you're a dude. I mean,
unless you're trying to hook up. Next question, favorite way
to spend it? A recording podcast and fucking happen to
restart and restart and restart. What type of music are
you into? It's a dumb question, but I like it all.
(27:59):
Where's the next you want to travel? On your bucket list?
I don't have a bucket list, dude. Bucket list are
for people who think they're gonna die. You know, I'm invincible.
I'm gonna live forever. Play this at my funeral when
they inevitably find me dead next week somewhere play this
(28:20):
audio clip, never Gonna die? What's your go to guilty pleasure?
Rice Krispy treats dude all day long hot homemade rice
Krispy treats. I don't think there's really much better than that.
I mean, probably winning the lottery would be pretty sick.
But do you have a favorite holiday? Halloween? Guys, Halloween's
(28:42):
right around the corner. What should I What should I
go as? This year? It'd be cool? I are we
gonna get to a point where you get canceled if
you dress up like a serial killer? You know, because
I know there's like some costumes that people think really
cross the line. In fact, let me look that up.
(29:04):
I'm gonna type I'm holding the mic howllowen costumes that
I'm typing one here crossed the line. There has to
be a list on the internet. Let's see here offensive
(29:25):
Halloween Halloween costumes that may have crossed the line. Let's
see here. This is a Pinterest submission. Well, these are
all actually kind of scary. Okay, this isn't what I
was looking for. Should I have typed in offensive Halloween costumes? Uh? Okay,
(29:45):
here we go Halloween costumes that cross the line and
how to avoid picking one? Oh hey, this is yeah,
I'm doing you a service. Now what a treat? I
hate this? This is a shitty article, God damn it,
other terrible costume I be is here we go? If
you don't want to end up being shamed on social
media or summoned by your company's HR department or school administration.
(30:11):
Let's see after they find out what you were for Halloween.
The rules are pretty simple, win in doubt, play it safe.
Need more concrete guidelines, yes I do. I'm not sure
I can come up with a costume that isn't morally
and somehow socially reprehensible. First off, stay away from any
costume with racial overtones. Okay. This lesson was reinforced Wednesday
(30:36):
when NBC Today host Megan Kelly had to apologize for
comments she made one day earlier saying that when she
was a kid, it was acceptable to wear a costume
involving blackface as long as it was respectful. Could you
imagine rolling up to a party in a blackface and
(30:56):
being like, what, I'm a congressman or you know, or
I'm an astronaut, Like why did you paint your face black? Dude?
Like why did anyone ever think that was a good idea? Ever?
Ted Danson did man at the what was it? The
woop be Goldberg Birthday Friar's Roast in the nineties, he
(31:17):
rolled up in straight black face, and Ted Danson still
has a career other terrible costume ideas, any that make
light of oppression of a whole group of people. So
Sexy Handmaid's Tale is inappropriate. I disagree. It's a fictional show. Sure,
those women are oppressed on the show, but it's fiction,
(31:38):
and it's your spin on fiction. It's like, you can
write sexy Handmaid's Tale fan fiction, right, you could probably
wear a costume that's kind of sexy but also too
Why sex that up? Why that's kind of a cool
costume in it itself. I mean, if you have the cloak,
and you have the you know, the friends that are
also all wearing cloaks, why wouldn't you just not sex
(31:59):
it up. Let's see also in apro any costume that
appropriates the culture of an oppressed gender or race. Hello
Native American tempteresst. That's what the article said. I didn't
say that. Yeah, it's probably not a good idea to
dress as an oppressed gender or race. Now since there's
(32:20):
only so okay so oppressed gender, So I don't even
I'm not even gonna touch that any costume that indulges
an animal cruelty. Remember the Minnesota dentist what was that?
I don't remember this. I'm gonna click this article and
I'm gonna say, take me here. He's a lion killer.
(32:42):
Oh okay, So it's like people that dressed up with
in like a dentist jacket and then like pretended to
kill a lion. Okay, man, I'm so deeply offended by that.
I don't think I'm gonna be able to sleep tonight
because of how offended I am by that fucking pretty
benign costume. And while it's obviously not on the same
(33:07):
level of offensiveness as any other costume mentioned above. Sexy
versions of anything gross or grotesque, like last year's sexy
pizza at. What the fuck is this? Do you guys
know about the sexy pizza at? Okay? So I just
clicked this link and it took me to Yandy. Okay
(33:29):
for those who feel overdressed in a rat so, I
don't know what the fuck I'm not cool Guys who
decided all female Halloween costumes have to be sexed up
anyway sexy and who gives a shit?
Speaker 4 (33:45):
Man?
Speaker 1 (33:46):
I think you should not write articles like this, and
you should just let people, you know, find out. I
don't know Ivember first that their costume was fucked up
when they get lego from their jobs. I just can't
imagine picking a costume and saying, oh my god, this
is so good and then being having that big of
a blind spot where it's like you were in blackface.
(34:07):
You can't do that also too, girls, man, girls need
to try harder in Halloween. I mean, there's some ladies
that really step it up. They hire like a makeup
artist and do like go to the real extreme with
the costume. They get wardrobe that's like from a movie
and they go for it. Other girls just put on
(34:28):
the fucking caddiers and tail. It's like, get out of here.
You're the least interesting person wherever you are if that's
your costume. Sorry, there's probably most people that listen to
this podcast just phoned it in on Halloween. Sorry guys, Ah,
what the fuck? There's two things playing, and there's been
(34:48):
two things playing this whole time. What a mess. I
shouldn't be allowed to run this board by myself. Are
you in any podcast? I want to tell people what
podcasts I listened to but I also so don't want
you to know what podcast I listened to. So I
think I'm gonna keep that to myself. Hey, I don't
want you guys to be like, you're yeah, So what
(35:13):
do we got here? What time is it? It's four
forty nine. We got ten minutes left, guys. I think
ish I took some time off because I literally in
the middle of recording, I was like, I don't want
to do this. How do you take your coffee? I
usually like it black, but then lately I have been
hitting a lot of the specialty creams and sugars and stuff,
(35:34):
but I like, try and go no sugar, right? Is
that smart? I don't know if I'm gonna put this
episode out. Can we talk about The Daily Mail? Do
you guys know what the Daily Mail is? It's a
news site for dumb people. No, it's not bad. It's
just a lot of celebrity shit. It'll be like, oh
my god. Amber Herd were surfaces for the first time
(35:56):
since her Johnny Depp legal catastrophe for a Spanish getaway.
So this chick Amber heard owns ohs fifteen million dollars
giant legal bill to Johnny Depp and whatever state, Probably California,
I'm assuming that's where that case took place. Maybe maybe not.
(36:17):
But if I'm fifteen million dollars in the red for
a lawsuit, you know where, I'm not going to be
on a fucking Spanish getaway. Maybe too abscond with what's
left of my life, never to resurface again. But like, why,
how is this? Why? If you can't pay, you should
(36:39):
have a date. You need to have your fifteen million
dollars paid by X day. And you're not allowed to
leave the country. You're not allowed to do shit. Maybe
make some more movies, amber heard, but make some good
ones this time, you know. Adele finally travels to Las
Vegas to check out up on her much delayed residency
(37:01):
as she flashes diamond gold ring on her fingerboarding private
jet in La Fuck you, Adele, Sorry, yeah, you know what.
I'm out of steam. I want to keep going, but
I just I literally just said some of the craziest
shit I've ever said, and I've realized how I have
to edit it all out, and I can't even really
(37:24):
talk about what I wanted to talk about. So what
I'm gonna do is I'm gonna end the episode now
I am moving on with my day. I need to
finish editing this, and you know I also maybe I'm
cutting it a little short today because you know, I
want to talk. I want to pay tribute to Coolio.
(37:44):
That seems important, so to pad the time and to
also pay tribute. Here is the full version of see
You when You Get There by f This one's my
cover of I'll see You when You Get there by Coolio.
Check it out. God, fucking damn it, nothing has gone
right today. Let's check out his cover. What is destiny
(38:08):
a place will beach possible?
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Er not?
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Along with all the enemies allotted? Everyone who comes and
goes stay out for reason. Guys, maybe ending the podcast
and playing this happened for a reason. I've now found
Ron what's his name, Rashan. I don't know who the
fuck this guy is, but this cover.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
That is for sure.
Speaker 1 (38:30):
You asked for the meaning. As your life starts season,
suddenly everything just stops you appeasing. These feelings get harder
and harder to handle. Emotions are toid to wave it
and oh my god, I'm just sitting here with my
mouth open, just reading the screen. Amazing his move on
your thoughts get tangle, you begin to showing yourself inside.
(38:52):
You get to a level where your body just died
while you're asked you're live because you know you cannot
fly if you've lacked, and what you do it should
never break. You try and stay intact. That's a fact.
I'm telling you this because I keep learning, learning from hope.
You go on burning your humanity away with your emotion stint.
Oh my fucking god, this is just all kinds of terrible.
(39:15):
All right, I'm done. I'm done. Here's a real coolio song.
Enjoy
Oh, hello, Hi everyone, Welcome to the premium episode this week.
So this is gonna be different. I tried to record
this episode I don't know, probably six times, and every
time I started recording it. This happens every once a while,
I got to a point where I was like, this
is fucking terrible, so I just stop it and started
(00:20):
over and then at one kind of stock. But I
wanted to show you guys what the process is like
this week, so I will be leaving in all the
starts and stops. I'll edit them down a little bit,
but eventually I'm going to talk to my friend Peyton Witmore,
and eventually I'm gonna get into some interesting stuff. But
(00:43):
it's gonna take a little while. But I wanted to
give you a peek behind the curtain of how annoying
and lame I can be. So enjoy and I hope
you feel my pain a little bit while you listen
to me starting and stopping. But I do this because
(01:05):
you know, I want to have a good podcast, a
good premium podcast. I feel like I used up all
my real energy today recording the free one. So I
think from now on what I'm gonna do is I'm
gonna record the premium episode first and then record the
free episode. I think that makes sense. It's a learning curve, guys.
(01:27):
I'm doing some different shit now. Thank you for being phasian.
You guys are fucking so sick. I promise next week
will be, you know, a little bit of normal, a
little bit more normal. I can't talk today too. I
must be having a stroke, that's all I can assume.
I think I'm either losing my mind or I'm just
(01:48):
rapidly approaching, just stroking out, stroking out. So, without further ado,
here is the clusterfuck that was recording this week episode.
You guys are rad Thank you for subscribing. Oh hello everyone, Hi,
(02:24):
how are you? It's Grant. This is your first week
subscribe to the premium Terrible Person feed. Thank you so much.
Just to let you know we do. I said we
would do three, three a month, So I'm considering this
the third episode. Even though I'm putting it up, I
just have a feeling this is going to be bad.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Oh hello, Hi everyone, welcome back to the premium version
of Terrible Person How to Become a Terrible Person.
Speaker 1 (03:00):
Hi, I'm Grant. I don't know if I just said
that it's been a day. I've had a day since
I recorded the free episode this morning, and fuck man,
so many things have happened, insomuch as I've edited the
episode today and done a bunch of chores around the house,
nothing too crazy. I just went to uh one more time.
(03:34):
The third time is a charm, I'm saying. I'm thinking,
we'll see. This is the third time I've started to
record the premium podcast. Hope this one sticks. We'll see.
I don't know. I'm a little gassed, a little tired,
a big day. I just spent the last hour outside
cleaning my car. Took it to one of those self
service car wash use I left it was car washes,
(03:59):
left it. Uh jesus, I can't fucking talk right now.
It's it's four o'clock. I recorded the first episode, like
what nine thirty, and now I've evolved into no recognizable
language or speech patterns. Just an idiot. But anyway, what
I was saying is I went to one of those
self service car washes, the one where you get to shit,
(04:19):
hold your own nozzle, that sort of thing. I love those.
There's not that many of them anymore, they don't exist.
And this one I really like, because it's got the blower,
so at the end you can wow, you guys know
what a fucking blower sounds like. Anyway, was there and
I pulled in. Well technically yeah, okay. So I pulled
in and got the port I wanted, and they take
(04:42):
debit cards. So I was like, fuck, yah, I slide
my card rejected, declined nothing, no dice, no water. So
I'm like, fuck, try a couple more times. It's not going.
There's people around me washing their cars. So one of
the stalls down. The thing opens up and it's got
a different type of reader. So I'm like, maybe this
will work. Pull my car in there and move my floormats,
(05:03):
all this stuff. Swipe the car and nothing. Swipe it again, nothing.
Then fuck man, I try. I walk down to another
one slide my car. None of them wor can. So finally,
out of just pure anger and frustration, I go to
where my car's parked. I just keep swiping it up
and down super fast. I don't know. I probably did
it for about twenty seconds and then it's a card
(05:23):
accept it. I was like, fuck, yeah, my car was
really dirty. This is a really bad podcast. I think
today might be the week off. Yeah, I don't. All right,
fuck it, we're doing it. I yeah, Hello, Hi, Hello, Hi,
how are you? What's up? It's a premium episode. Listen, man,
(05:48):
I've tried to record this fucking thing four times again,
and then I realized I'm like five minutes in. I'm like,
I'm bored boring myself. So I decided to do something
different and this is maybe this episode may be for you,
may not be for you. Hello everyone, Hi, welcome back.
(06:12):
This is the second episode I've recorded today.
Speaker 3 (06:15):
This.
Speaker 1 (06:15):
You know, obviously this was a bad idea. If you
just listen to the free episode and you're you're in
this episode, it's it's a bad idea to do two
of these one day by myself. I think I gotta
split it up. Oh Hello, Happy Friday everyone. This is
(06:38):
Grant round two of recording today. If you're listening to this,
I'm recording this Friday afternoon, September thirtieth. It is four
oh seven pm. Not that it matters, not that anyone
gives a shit, but that's just what time it is.
So welcome. If this is your first week subscribe to
the Premium podcast. It's gonna be a little different this week.
I'm just gonna let you know. I'm just gonna I'm
(07:02):
gonna start an episode of a television show and I'm
gonna provide commentary for it while also doing the premium
episode of the podcast. Now you're probably wondering, Grant, why
are you doing this? And I'm gonna tell you because
I don't really want to do a premium episode right now.
I kind of do, kind of don't, but I'm out
of energy. My back hurts. I watched my Car today.
(07:22):
I'll get into all those free episode was good this week?
This is bad? Ah fuck this dumb shit. I don't
want to record right now. Uh huh yes, Hello, Hello, Hello, guys.
(07:50):
I wanted to I've started this episode fucking five times.
This is the last time I'm starting it. I've had
Jeffrey Dahmer on on the TV and I'm just gonna
let the audio roll through. Who gives a shit? So Hello,
Hi everyone, how are you? This is Grant. I'm back
at it. I'm trying to turn on the music, but
(08:12):
there we go. What's up? So I'm kind of out
of steam. I'm not gonna lee to you, guys. It's
four o'clock on a Friday, it's been a long week.
I just got done doing some automotive shit. Big car guy.
Guys went to all Riley Auto Parts. You've got zero
customer service. That should be a big part of their
(08:33):
fucking advertising campaign. We will not ask you a single
question when you walk in the door. Don't worry. We
won't bother you, won't let you make your own bad decisions.
And then when you bring it back later, we'll give
you a hard time every time. Yeah, I always buy
the wrong thing and then I have to bring it
back and they're like, well, why didn't you fucking ask us? Like,
where where were you guys? Whoa the hell's going on here? Okay,
(08:55):
so I just to set the scene, paint the picture.
I'm back in the den, sitting at my computer. I've
got a beautiful eighteen pound Touxedo cat. If she's not
eighteen pounds, she lost a bunch of weights. She's like
more like thirteen now, little bowling ball, she's a sizable
bowling ball. I don't even know if I was going bowling,
I don't think i'd pick a thirteen pound ball. What
(09:16):
is the point? Why do you pick what's never understood that?
Why wouldn't you want the lightest ball that you can
whip the hardest. Why do you want a heavy bowllying ball.
Let's look at this. Let's in general, the heavier the
bowling ball will be the better as a heavy ball.
(09:40):
What the fuck who wrote this? Well, I'm they'll carry
more power and they will have more chances of hooking
than a lightweight ball. That's very interesting. I used to
go bowling all the time. My dad apparently used to.
His dad used to own a bowling alley, so he's
really good at bowling. He's like one of those guys
that he'll bowl once a year and he'll bowl like
a two sec. Jesus dude. He's like what I like
(10:03):
to play. He's like Garth and Wayne's World in that
movie Wayne's World. I don't know if you guys have
ever heard of it, Wayne's World two when he does
a drum solo and then he goes I like to play.
That's my dad when he's bowling. I was never that
good at it. I just like to go and drink
a lot of beer. That was a good first first
date spot in Indiana. I feel like go bowling because
(10:26):
no one's a I guess it's cool, because then you're
kind of showing the person you're dating or people you're
with that, hey, you know, I don't care. I don't
care if you think I'm cool because I'm not good
at this. You know that's my And then also you
can get blackout drunk and then just wake up outside
the bowling alley. I know, I wanted to talk about
(10:48):
Justin Bieber and Haley Bieber and all that bullshit, but
who cares? Everybody Like, I still I'm still mad about
Justin Bieber canceling his tour. I wonder if canceling is
too and all this stuff in the Hailey Bieber interview
is related, like, because everyone's saying this this Hailey Bieber interview,
this call Her Daddy interview. I don't have any sound,
(11:09):
I don't have any examples of what she said particularly,
but what it was is she was saying that she
wasn't with Justin while Justin was with Selena. And apparently
Selena Gomez has a documentary coming out that's gonna blow
the roof off of things, and they think maybe this
is preemptive damage control to all of this. I say,
(11:31):
I don't fucking care, and I'm telling you guys this
and I'm saying I don't care, and I think I'm
just gonna move on, right I'm gonna move on with
my life and the podcast, because there are some really
interesting things happening in the world, like one Facebook. First
of all, metaburse. The metaburse sounds betty betty bad. I
(11:57):
don't want any part of that, Like why would you
want to have a three D version of Facebook? I
don't know. Fuck it, I'm gonna take this week off. Hello,
Hi everyone, Hi, Hi, it's Grant. I think this is
the week that I'm gonna take off this week for
(12:17):
the premium. I gotta be honest with you, guys. I've
sat down and started this recording. This is my sixth time,
and I've had different ideas for what I want to
do tell the stuff. I just have no energy. I
think I might have had a cold this week. I
don't know. I don't want to make excuses. I just
(12:38):
am kind of burned out and I want to do
a full podcast, and I you know, I want to
be fun and engaging. I just don't feel very fun
and engaging right now. Does that ever happened to you, guys?
It's the dumbest fucking podcast. Let's see, dude, I want
(12:58):
to get I want to talk about let's you know,
I had stuff I wanted to talk about. I want
to talk about how people are using Facebook still it's
like a personal diary and oversharing and all that stuff.
I watched someone who I met and am acquaintance with
that worked at a liquor store in Indiana. She had
this full domestic violence craziness with kids and with her house,
(13:20):
getting thrown out of her house, all this shit, and
she posted arguably the most compelling thing I've seen on
Facebook in like ten years. And it was just post
after post after post calling this guy out and tagging
him and you know, saying all this wild abusive shit
that she that he was doing, and then how he
(13:41):
pulled up to her house and had a gun and
they had to call the cops and he was evicted
and then he went to go get his stuff and
blah blah blah. I know this this chick's whole life story.
And then I went and clicked on, you know, his tag,
and then followed the whole story in For every post
that she had, he had one or two just you know,
refuting it. And now here. I am in Arizona on
(14:05):
a Friday, you know, Friday morning, and I'm just captivated
by this awful relationship drama and this, I mean, it
sounds terrible, I think, but I do think there is
something in when these people post on Facebook, there's like
(14:27):
a look at me element and they get sixty five
comments being like, oh girl, you're so strong, You're powerful,
You're you know, ferocious woman, You're whatever Beyonce says about ladies.
You're all those things. And she's like, I try, and
you're just like, how much of this is actually happening?
(14:49):
How much of this is happening inside your head? You know?
And why do you need to involve? She has four
thousand friends, she has near the max friends on her face,
and she's like, I don't know, Like, why do all
your friends need to know this? What is why is
this so important? In fact, I am so out of steam.
(15:12):
I'm gonna call my colleague and hope that she answers
to get her opinion on all this fun stuff. She's
I'm sure she's gonna be busy. I'm calling Peyton Whitmore
from the John Jay and Rich Show. She's like, I'm
going through my contacts and I realized there's a lot
of people I have. Paul Abdul's all her information. I
shouldn't call her. I have Chris Myers from Humphrey's McGhee.
(15:36):
I have a pretty famous country singer in here. I
don't think I should call him. That would not be good.
And also too a lot of these people I have
their phone numbers. I don't talk to him, but I don't.
Is it really worth it to go through and delete
numbers now out of your contacts? I don't think it is.
I don't. I don't think that's an at advantageous use
(15:56):
of what That's not the right This is a bad episode. Hello, Hi, everyone,
Welcome to the premium episode of How To Become a
Terrible Person this week doing something special today, and by
that I mean incredibly lazy. It is four thirty on
the nose right now. Here's what I'm gonna do for
(16:19):
the next half hour, regardless of what happens. No editing.
I also have nothing. I realized the shit that I
wanted to talk about was terribly uninteresting, Like nobody gives
a fuck about Hayley Bieber and Justin Bieber. I mean
if you're fifteen years old, maybe that's acceptable to be,
you know, totally obsessed with. But I just was like,
(16:40):
you know, I've talked a lot about celebrities lately, and
to me, I'm just I'm I'm telling everyone how uninteresting
they are, and then I'm talking about them and I'm like,
that's fucking crazy. What am I doing? That sounds like
I've got, you know, mental issues. If I'm just obsessing
(17:01):
about these people, that fucking drive me crazy. So what
I'm gonna do is I've got a bunch of questions
that were sent into nine one zero five five seven
two eight seven one the text line, and I'm gonna
answer some of those questions and I'm gonna fucking talk
about some shit as I answer the questions. Right. Sounds fun?
Maybe not? Well anyway, thank you for subscribing. Let's fucking
(17:23):
do this. Oh what's up? You guys have no idea
the pain and suffering I've been through so far today
to try and record this premium episode. That's why I've
landed on what I'm doing, which is just whatever happens.
(17:44):
It's a half hour and we'll just we'll see, we'll
see if this is even usable at the end of it.
It might be, it might not be. You might not
get a premium episode this week. It's just the first
thing is I sat down. It was probably three o'clock.
I did a lot of stuff today. I recorded the episode,
the free episode, and then I went and got a haircut.
(18:09):
And let me tell you, great clips. This is not
an ad. It's kind of an ad. I fucking love
great clips. I don't there's no no what is it,
No frills, It's just good old fashioned haircuttery. And sometimes
I just want to go get my haircut and I
don't want to have to sit in a fucking race
(18:30):
car or or football come. I want to go to
sports clips. I also, I hate, hate, hate, hate the
salon scene, especially where we live, which is you know, Arizona, Mace, Arizona, Scottsdale, Arizona.
It's a bunch of just keeping up with the Jones
(18:51):
as shit. You know, people spend way too much money
on haircuts and stuff like that. I called Peyton earlier
when I was recording an episode. I'm gonna call her back,
and I'm just gonna I was talking about how corny
I think oversharing is on Facebook, because there's this chick
that is just blowing up everyone's feet, blowing up everyone's
(19:13):
feet with just the most salacious, hateful, hurtful shit about
her axe and how he's a monster and how he
got them evicted from their place and all this stuff,
and she's got kids and it's so messy and gross,
and the other the other day she posted maybe I
don't know, ten fifteen things like post post, post, this
(19:35):
is what else he did, this is what he does
to me, blah blah blah, And I mean, there's no
there's no like egregious abuse. You know, you're looking at
it and you're like, well, I mean, he didn't fucking
slam your head against the door. He didn't burn your
hand on the oven. You know, he didn't waterboard you
in the bathroom and socking in the stomach. You know,
(19:58):
it's just like, I can't believe he had the you know,
they're they're split up. And she's talking about how he
tells the kids stuff, and I mean, the stuff I
think he tells the kids is probably your mom's fucking crazy,
because by all accounts, she is fucking crazy, and she's
always going to e DM concerts and all this stuff.
(20:19):
And then so so her feed will be, you know,
fifteen posts about uh edm and mac Miller and shit
like that. You know, drug music, fucking druggy music. I think,
I think, let's see that mac miller. Em what else?
What other music? Do people do? Drugs too? It's just
(20:40):
kind of lame. I don't know. I feel like you
take pills and listen to mc millar and you're like,
he's so talented, He's the most talented rapper. Rip him.
And Ariana was an arian Grande that dated mac millar.
One what was she thinking? Too? Okay? Cool? I did
this whole thing about celebrities and Hayley Beaver and Justin
(21:04):
Bieber and I was like, I don't care. So it
kind of lost track of where I was going. But
I guess what I'm trying to say is Facebook has
always been a place for people to overshare, but I
feel like people don't do that anymore. I feel like
it's just kind of one of those things that's passe.
So it's interesting when people do it now. So hold on,
we're calling Peyton. I'm gonna see if I can get
(21:25):
her on the phone. We'll see hello, Hello, is this
Peyton Witmore?
Speaker 3 (21:32):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (21:33):
It's like some dudy named Grant. Maybe.
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Yeah, Hey, what's up. I'm recording the podcast and let's
go on. I'm totally out of steam because I just
I was so mad in the first episode. I just
fucking lost my shit and I wanted to ask you.
Do you overshare on Facebook?
Speaker 4 (21:50):
On Facebook? No, on Instagram and Twitter? Probably?
Speaker 1 (21:54):
What do you think about people that overshare on Facebook
like family drama and shit? What does that say about
the person posting.
Speaker 3 (21:59):
It that they need to get over themselves and get
a live Nobody cares?
Speaker 1 (22:04):
Okay, good because I landed. I landed on that conclusion myself,
and I just wanted to make sure a rational person
also felt that way. So what are you doing today?
Speaker 4 (22:14):
Oh?
Speaker 3 (22:15):
Nothing, I'm just hanging out at home and watching my
boyfriend play Madden.
Speaker 1 (22:19):
Oh dang, that hot actually hot ass boyfriend of yours
kadem fact that.
Speaker 3 (22:25):
No, I'm going I'm going to my favorite dispensaries customer
Appreciation Day.
Speaker 4 (22:30):
That's where I'm growing today.
Speaker 1 (22:31):
Oh ship, that's tight. What a sticky soorrow.
Speaker 4 (22:35):
Mm hmm that's my place.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
Dang, dude, you hooked it up, by the way, this week,
you uh you made friends with sticky tomorrow and they
gave you a bunch of shit and then you passed
it along to me, and I want to I wanted
to tell you with the things you gave me, I
was almost in a coma.
Speaker 4 (22:53):
Oh I am that right?
Speaker 1 (22:55):
I immediately ate them, like within within five minute, it's
leaving the station.
Speaker 4 (23:01):
Are you okay?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (23:03):
I mean, how did you survive that? Well?
Speaker 1 (23:05):
I just I took a lot. I took all of it,
and then I drank a bunch of caffeine and then
I was just like the whole day I was. I
was just stressed out and paranoid, and I was like,
the end of the the end of the world is here. Peyton.
Speaker 4 (23:17):
Yeah, that does not sound like a good time. I'm sorry.
Speaker 1 (23:19):
Well yeah, Peyton, I I don't know what happened, but
I just I was talking about Olivia Wilde and the
celebrities that do that, like they fake stories so people
talk about them, right, Can I can I get your take?
This is I won't I won't keep you. I just
want to hear what your take is on the Haley
Justin Bieber thing. Do you think the uh, the Hailey
(23:40):
Bieber interview? Do you think she was up to something.
Do you think she actually did something to Selena Gomez?
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Like, I mean, yeah, I bet you she was banging
Justin Bieber while he had a girlfriend, Like, it's Justin Bieber,
do you But here's.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
The question, ultimately, Peyton, do you think anyone really cares?
Speaker 4 (24:01):
No, I don't think anybody cares.
Speaker 3 (24:02):
I think that Hayley Baber went on to do damage
control and probably thinks people do care.
Speaker 4 (24:07):
Same with Selena Gomez.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Do you think those those people are going to live
a long time? Like, do you think we're do you
think in twenty five years we're still gonna be like
I wonder what Justin Bieber's doing right now? Or do
you think he's going to be dead?
Speaker 4 (24:22):
Shit, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (24:23):
The way he's so back and forth with his music
and his career and stuff. He might be gone, but
I'm sure we are going to care because social media
is all take I.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Well, I mean also to that bullshit where he's like
I got to cancel my tour because I have mental
health issues. It's like, dude, no, man, you just didn't
sell any tickets. Probably right, Dick, stop stop talking about
God in your music and get back to that real
sexual justin Bieber. Shit, you know what I mean?
Speaker 3 (24:50):
Right?
Speaker 1 (24:50):
Well, anyway, Sorry, Peyton. I didn't mean to drag you
into this hole that I'm in, but sorry, Happy Happy Friday.
You got any big, crazy plans this weekend other than
you're at home? What do you have them for dinner tonight?
Speaker 4 (25:08):
Jeez?
Speaker 3 (25:08):
I have no Well I'm having that food truck from
my favorite dispensary, but I think I'm gonna make too
just to have it.
Speaker 1 (25:15):
Damn, I already had spaghetti ones. I need to figure out, Peyton.
My life's falling apart. I don't know what I'm gonna
have for dinner. I don't know what the fun I'm
gonna talk about for the next twenty minutes. So I'm
just royally fucked. Period. Did you hear the queen died?
Speaker 4 (25:28):
Did I?
Speaker 1 (25:28):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (25:29):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (25:30):
I think that's old news.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
What I mean, I'm devastated. Yeah, how are all those
high power elite pedophiles gonna get their children?
Speaker 3 (25:42):
Now?
Speaker 1 (25:43):
The queen said? Oh shots firedst Does that? I mean?
Would that shock you? I think it would shock you
to find out that the queen wasn't racist? Yes, exactly?
Well hell yeah, Peyton, Well, hey, I hope you have
a wonderful weekend, and I will see you bright and
early on Monday. Thank you for letting me talk to you.
Speaker 4 (26:03):
Ye wait, dude, of course, talk to you later. Oh.
Speaker 1 (26:05):
Also, I have twelve long stem, beautiful long stem roses. Uh,
and I wanted to see if you we could send
those out to a significant other of yours.
Speaker 4 (26:16):
Oh yeah, what's that? Another broke up with me and
tells me that every day?
Speaker 1 (26:21):
Oh dang, is this an exclusive kid?
Speaker 4 (26:30):
Yes, she does know.
Speaker 1 (26:31):
How's it? What's the score update in Madden? Who is
he and how's he doing?
Speaker 4 (26:35):
I think he's the Patriots.
Speaker 3 (26:36):
It looks like he's at twenty four to nineteen against
the Cincinnati Bengals.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
Geez duh? Well hell yeah? Well bye, Peyton. I hope
you I hope you have a wonderful day.
Speaker 4 (26:49):
Yes you too.
Speaker 1 (26:50):
Bye, I mean many blessings, bye bye. All right, that's
my friend Peyton. I work with her. She's a really
nice person. Find her on social me Peyton whitmore so
glad she returned my call and answered, I'm kind of
all over the place like I wanted to talk. I
realized it didn't set up that justin Bieber story had
just got into it with her, but I don't really
think it's that interesting. Let's see here questions to ask
(27:14):
a guy. Somebody just sent me this article. Let's see
what we got here. What's your favorite way to spend
a day off? If I asked a guy that question,
that's me implying that I want to, you know, go
on a rough ride with him at a truck stop.
(27:35):
Never ask a guy what's your favorite way to spend
a day off, especially if you're a dude. I mean,
unless you're trying to hook up. Next question, favorite way
to spend it? A recording podcast and fucking happen to
restart and restart and restart. What type of music are
you into? It's a dumb question, but I like it all.
(27:59):
Where's the next you want to travel? On your bucket list?
I don't have a bucket list, dude. Bucket list are
for people who think they're gonna die. You know, I'm invincible.
I'm gonna live forever. Play this at my funeral when
they inevitably find me dead next week somewhere play this
(28:20):
audio clip, never Gonna die? What's your go to guilty pleasure?
Rice Krispy treats dude all day long hot homemade rice
Krispy treats. I don't think there's really much better than that.
I mean, probably winning the lottery would be pretty sick.
But do you have a favorite holiday? Halloween? Guys, Halloween's
(28:42):
right around the corner. What should I What should I
go as? This year? It'd be cool? I are we
gonna get to a point where you get canceled if
you dress up like a serial killer? You know, because
I know there's like some costumes that people think really
cross the line. In fact, let me look that up.
(29:04):
I'm gonna type I'm holding the mic howllowen costumes that
I'm typing one here crossed the line. There has to
be a list on the internet. Let's see here offensive
(29:25):
Halloween Halloween costumes that may have crossed the line. Let's
see here. This is a Pinterest submission. Well, these are
all actually kind of scary. Okay, this isn't what I
was looking for. Should I have typed in offensive Halloween costumes? Uh? Okay,
(29:45):
here we go Halloween costumes that cross the line and
how to avoid picking one? Oh hey, this is yeah,
I'm doing you a service. Now what a treat? I
hate this? This is a shitty article, God damn it,
other terrible costume I be is here we go? If
you don't want to end up being shamed on social
media or summoned by your company's HR department or school administration.
(30:11):
Let's see after they find out what you were for Halloween.
The rules are pretty simple, win in doubt, play it safe.
Need more concrete guidelines, yes I do. I'm not sure
I can come up with a costume that isn't morally
and somehow socially reprehensible. First off, stay away from any
costume with racial overtones. Okay. This lesson was reinforced Wednesday
(30:36):
when NBC Today host Megan Kelly had to apologize for
comments she made one day earlier saying that when she
was a kid, it was acceptable to wear a costume
involving blackface as long as it was respectful. Could you
imagine rolling up to a party in a blackface and
(30:56):
being like, what, I'm a congressman or you know, or
I'm an astronaut, Like why did you paint your face black? Dude?
Like why did anyone ever think that was a good idea? Ever?
Ted Danson did man at the what was it? The
woop be Goldberg Birthday Friar's Roast in the nineties, he
(31:17):
rolled up in straight black face, and Ted Danson still
has a career other terrible costume ideas, any that make
light of oppression of a whole group of people. So
Sexy Handmaid's Tale is inappropriate. I disagree. It's a fictional show. Sure,
those women are oppressed on the show, but it's fiction,
(31:38):
and it's your spin on fiction. It's like, you can
write sexy Handmaid's Tale fan fiction, right, you could probably
wear a costume that's kind of sexy but also too
Why sex that up? Why that's kind of a cool
costume in it itself. I mean, if you have the cloak,
and you have the you know, the friends that are
also all wearing cloaks, why wouldn't you just not sex
(31:59):
it up. Let's see also in apro any costume that
appropriates the culture of an oppressed gender or race. Hello
Native American tempteresst. That's what the article said. I didn't
say that. Yeah, it's probably not a good idea to
dress as an oppressed gender or race. Now since there's
(32:20):
only so okay so oppressed gender, So I don't even
I'm not even gonna touch that any costume that indulges
an animal cruelty. Remember the Minnesota dentist what was that?
I don't remember this. I'm gonna click this article and
I'm gonna say, take me here. He's a lion killer.
(32:42):
Oh okay, So it's like people that dressed up with
in like a dentist jacket and then like pretended to
kill a lion. Okay, man, I'm so deeply offended by that.
I don't think I'm gonna be able to sleep tonight
because of how offended I am by that fucking pretty
benign costume. And while it's obviously not on the same
(33:07):
level of offensiveness as any other costume mentioned above. Sexy
versions of anything gross or grotesque, like last year's sexy
pizza at. What the fuck is this? Do you guys
know about the sexy pizza at? Okay? So I just
clicked this link and it took me to Yandy. Okay
(33:29):
for those who feel overdressed in a rat so, I
don't know what the fuck I'm not cool Guys who
decided all female Halloween costumes have to be sexed up
anyway sexy and who gives a shit?
Speaker 4 (33:45):
Man?
Speaker 1 (33:46):
I think you should not write articles like this, and
you should just let people, you know, find out. I
don't know Ivember first that their costume was fucked up
when they get lego from their jobs. I just can't
imagine picking a costume and saying, oh my god, this
is so good and then being having that big of
a blind spot where it's like you were in blackface.
(34:07):
You can't do that also too, girls, man, girls need
to try harder in Halloween. I mean, there's some ladies
that really step it up. They hire like a makeup
artist and do like go to the real extreme with
the costume. They get wardrobe that's like from a movie
and they go for it. Other girls just put on
(34:28):
the fucking caddiers and tail. It's like, get out of here.
You're the least interesting person wherever you are if that's
your costume. Sorry, there's probably most people that listen to
this podcast just phoned it in on Halloween. Sorry guys, Ah,
what the fuck? There's two things playing, and there's been
(34:48):
two things playing this whole time. What a mess. I
shouldn't be allowed to run this board by myself. Are
you in any podcast? I want to tell people what
podcasts I listened to but I also so don't want
you to know what podcast I listened to. So I
think I'm gonna keep that to myself. Hey, I don't
want you guys to be like, you're yeah, So what
(35:13):
do we got here? What time is it? It's four
forty nine. We got ten minutes left, guys. I think
ish I took some time off because I literally in
the middle of recording, I was like, I don't want
to do this. How do you take your coffee? I
usually like it black, but then lately I have been
hitting a lot of the specialty creams and sugars and stuff,
(35:34):
but I like, try and go no sugar, right? Is
that smart? I don't know if I'm gonna put this
episode out. Can we talk about The Daily Mail? Do
you guys know what the Daily Mail is? It's a
news site for dumb people. No, it's not bad. It's
just a lot of celebrity shit. It'll be like, oh
my god. Amber Herd were surfaces for the first time
(35:56):
since her Johnny Depp legal catastrophe for a Spanish getaway.
So this chick Amber heard owns ohs fifteen million dollars
giant legal bill to Johnny Depp and whatever state, Probably California,
I'm assuming that's where that case took place. Maybe maybe not.
(36:17):
But if I'm fifteen million dollars in the red for
a lawsuit, you know where, I'm not going to be
on a fucking Spanish getaway. Maybe too abscond with what's
left of my life, never to resurface again. But like, why,
how is this? Why? If you can't pay, you should
(36:39):
have a date. You need to have your fifteen million
dollars paid by X day. And you're not allowed to
leave the country. You're not allowed to do shit. Maybe
make some more movies, amber heard, but make some good
ones this time, you know. Adele finally travels to Las
Vegas to check out up on her much delayed residency
(37:01):
as she flashes diamond gold ring on her fingerboarding private
jet in La Fuck you, Adele, Sorry, yeah, you know what.
I'm out of steam. I want to keep going, but
I just I literally just said some of the craziest
shit I've ever said, and I've realized how I have
to edit it all out, and I can't even really
(37:24):
talk about what I wanted to talk about. So what
I'm gonna do is I'm gonna end the episode now
I am moving on with my day. I need to
finish editing this, and you know I also maybe I'm
cutting it a little short today because you know, I
want to talk. I want to pay tribute to Coolio.
(37:44):
That seems important, so to pad the time and to
also pay tribute. Here is the full version of see
You when You Get There by f This one's my
cover of I'll see You when You Get there by Coolio.
Check it out. God, fucking damn it, nothing has gone
right today. Let's check out his cover. What is destiny
(38:08):
a place will beach possible?
Speaker 4 (38:10):
Er not?
Speaker 1 (38:10):
Along with all the enemies allotted? Everyone who comes and
goes stay out for reason. Guys, maybe ending the podcast
and playing this happened for a reason. I've now found
Ron what's his name, Rashan. I don't know who the
fuck this guy is, but this cover.
Speaker 4 (38:29):
That is for sure.
Speaker 1 (38:30):
You asked for the meaning. As your life starts season,
suddenly everything just stops you appeasing. These feelings get harder
and harder to handle. Emotions are toid to wave it
and oh my god, I'm just sitting here with my
mouth open, just reading the screen. Amazing his move on
your thoughts get tangle, you begin to showing yourself inside.
(38:52):
You get to a level where your body just died
while you're asked you're live because you know you cannot
fly if you've lacked, and what you do it should
never break. You try and stay intact. That's a fact.
I'm telling you this because I keep learning, learning from hope.
You go on burning your humanity away with your emotion stint.
Oh my fucking god, this is just all kinds of terrible.
(39:15):
All right, I'm done. I'm done. Here's a real coolio song.
Enjoy
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