234. Oatmeal on the Beach

"Fudge-a-Mania," chapters 11-12. Jody and Molly bring you the PENULTIMATE episode of this hilarious 1990 Judy Blume sequel to "Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing" and "Superfudge". Jimmy and Sheila form an alliance, Fudge ODs on blueberries, and Peter joins the ISAF Club. There's also a harrowing sailing excursion with the most amazing food, and an unlikely artistic collab between Frank Fargo and Tootsie. Thank you to Blume Heads Tori and Sue for their great letters. It's a Judy Blume book club. Join us every other week!

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:17):
What was that?

Speaker 2 (00:18):
Do you hear that? Yeah, spooky happening in my apart. Oh,
I think somebody just dropped something huge somewhere.

Speaker 1 (00:27):
Wow, that sounded like an airplane coming through.

Speaker 2 (00:29):
I didn't know it wasn't. I think somebody's struggling with
a big bin of something.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
Well, do you need help?

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Hello? You get I think they're fine whatever.

Speaker 1 (00:44):
Uh? Well, Hi, I'm Jodie and I'm Mollie and you're
listening to the Bloom Saloon.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
It's a Judy Bloom book Club.

Speaker 1 (00:53):
Oh you said that's so fast.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Well, I'm trying because, like I love copying the cadences
of things, and sometimes I catch myself doing an Allison Yeah, impress.
So I'm trying to do my little spin on it.

Speaker 1 (01:07):
We're here today to talk about chapters eleven and twelve
of fudge Mania.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
The penultimate chapters.

Speaker 1 (01:16):
It's true way to use penultimate. I'm always waiting for
a reason to use penultimate.

Speaker 2 (01:22):
Good job, And people use it incorrectly all the time.

Speaker 1 (01:26):
So wait, how are they using it?

Speaker 2 (01:29):
Some people use it as a synonym of ultimate, like
the most, and it's like no, no, no, it means
second to.

Speaker 1 (01:35):
Last, insanity.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
Yeah, stop cut it. Out.

Speaker 1 (01:39):
If I'm doing that, stop cut it out. Stop there's Oh,
there's another word that people use. It's like similar to that. Oh,
it's going to come to me.

Speaker 2 (01:48):
People say people use nonplussed incorrectly, but I don't know
what the correct version of it is.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
It means like confused.

Speaker 2 (01:59):
Or oh, I see it doesn't mean like unbothered, because
it sounds like it should mean unbothered, but it doesn't.

Speaker 1 (02:06):
You read my mind though, that was the word crystal.

Speaker 2 (02:09):
If there's the crystals, well, pretty much like if there
is a grammar thing to be pedantic about, I'll be
pedantic about it. So it really it's not that far afield.
That's not entirely true. I just feel like the older
I get, the more I'm like, okay, guys, let's tighten
it up just a little bit.

Speaker 1 (02:26):
Do you Are you familiar with the book Eats, Shoots
and Leaves.

Speaker 2 (02:30):
I know of it and I know what it's referring to,
but I haven't read it.

Speaker 1 (02:34):
For some reason, I have it. I think I asked
for it for Christmas one year years ago. What a dork,
and I love it. I'm currently purging a lot of books.
I don't know. It's very sad, but I have to.
You have to, and I just can't decide about this one.
Does eat shoots and leaves go to the little free
library or does it stay with me?

Speaker 2 (02:56):
You should keep it. It's funny, it's so.

Speaker 1 (02:59):
Dump, but it is. It's a certain kind of person
who has that book in their house. And I realized
that I'm that person.

Speaker 2 (03:08):
I'm into it.

Speaker 1 (03:09):
Maybe I'll give it to you. I'll sign it.

Speaker 2 (03:12):
Oh my god, that'd be so fun. I'd love that.
I would love that.

Speaker 1 (03:15):
Don't be nonplussed.

Speaker 2 (03:17):
Oh gosh.

Speaker 1 (03:17):
Okay, So bloomheads, we have some letters for you.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
This letter is from Sue j Cool and she says, Hi,
Jody and Mollie. First, I have some nineteen seventies lore
to impart. My older brother used to have a book
called Paul's Birthday about him. Our mother had it made
for him on his eighth birthday in nineteen seventy nine.
You had to submit your child's name, favorites, hobbies and friends,

(03:45):
or siblings names like mad libs to a vanity book
publishing mill and they send you back a one size
fits all story book. Second, Norma Klein is one of
my favorite authors, and if I ever have enough ambition,
I would like to make an Norma podcast. Beginner's Love
is quintessential Norma, flawed characters, real sex, and fantastic dialogue. Third,

(04:09):
I plan on getting a Francis the Badger tattoo this summer.
Oh my god, I used to get the record from
my local library for a solid two years, and you
better believe I had those stories memorized. Have a great day, y'all.
Love another indoor sports sue Jay.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
Wait, what's Francis the Badger?

Speaker 2 (04:29):
Oh my gosh, okay, so great. This is gonna be
a great social post. But they are these books. Let
me look up who wrote them? Their picture books. And Francis,
as you can imagine, is a little badger and she
has a little brother and a little sister and or sister,
and they're just cute little illustration books. They're so cute.

(04:52):
She's like a little naughty I remember the book that
I had. I think it's called like a Birthday for Francis,
where she supposed to buy her sister a birthday present
and she buys a candy bar and she eats it
because she's just like little greedy kid. So I love
these books. They're by Russell Hobin and I think that
would make a fantastic tattoo. Please take a picture of it.

(05:15):
That's so cool.

Speaker 1 (05:16):
Francis is so cute. And of course the first one
I clicked on Francis looks like she's eating a peeb
and j oh.

Speaker 2 (05:23):
So that's bread and jam for Francis, right, Oh my god,
that one I remember loving. I think the thing in
that is she only eats bread and jam. She doesn't
eat normal people food, and I love that. The other
thing I will say about that is, did you ever
have any kind of like vanity like name, insert book

(05:45):
or stuff like that. No.

Speaker 1 (05:47):
That's what surprises me about Sue Jay's letter is I
I didn't realize they were doing that as early as
the seventies. That seems very advanced for nineteen seventies technology
and very expensive.

Speaker 2 (06:00):
Oh I bet it was. But how cool is that?

Speaker 1 (06:03):
That's so cool? What about you?

Speaker 2 (06:05):
I did that unlocked a memory? Is I had a tape.
Now this is what must have been really expensive. Is
I had a tape that was like little stories and
little songs, and it was it was like for Mollie
and it was like, I don't think they cut I
also had a book two that was more highly customized,

(06:27):
I think, but the songs were like Molly went to
the farm, Mollie went to the farm. I was like,
that's me, always going to the farm. I'll have to
find that. But that is wild because that just means
you like went to the studio for hours on end.
We're like, Jacob went to the farm, Joe, you went

(06:49):
to the farm? Like or do you just record a
bunch of names and splice it.

Speaker 1 (06:56):
That sounds more like it, But then but then how
does it the syllables make a difference with like, Yeah,
I'm so impressed by all of this.

Speaker 2 (07:08):
That's crazy. Wow.

Speaker 1 (07:09):
The closest I can think of for me was, uh,
this is before your time. But there was a show
called Romper Room. Oh yeah, I remember, okay, And then
they have this segment where they would like shout out
random kids' names and then like you, the child in
front of your TV set would be like, that's me,
that's me, and I'd always listen out for Jody and
they never said Jody because no one was called Jody

(07:31):
except Jodie Foster. Oh yeah, I felt really left out.
But oh poor say for you going to the farm. Yeah,
I was happy for Sue.

Speaker 2 (07:44):
For Sue's brother Paul. Now, wait, that's another goal in
the story, Sue, did you not get one? They just
make one for your brother? Because if so? Is that
another tally in our Oldest Siblings have an axe to
grind column?

Speaker 1 (08:00):
Because oh yeah, I like taking that column right now.

Speaker 2 (08:04):
Jody, do you feel like are you confronted a lot
that there aren't things with your name on it?

Speaker 1 (08:11):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (08:12):
Oh, I'm sorry. I will make you a license plate keychain.

Speaker 1 (08:16):
Another thing I unearthed with all this packing is I
guess at some point when I lived in Connecticut, I
was like five years old, I must have found the
one little mini license plate. I think they were made
for your bike, Like, do you remember putting license plates
on the back of bike seat?

Speaker 2 (08:33):
Do?

Speaker 1 (08:33):
Says Jody? Jody? And then the constitution state?

Speaker 2 (08:38):
Cool, that's awesome.

Speaker 1 (08:40):
Yeah that's my one.

Speaker 2 (08:42):
That's a great one.

Speaker 1 (08:44):
All right, I've got a letter from Bloomhead Tory. Tory
says Hi bloom Saloon. First of all, let me start
by saying, I'm a huge fan of the Pondday. I
discovered you all back in two when I was listening
to reruns of The Teen Mom Trash Talk podcast. Oh yeah,

(09:05):
and immediately began devouring your past seasons. Mollie. I don't
know if you know Tea Mom trash Talk, but I
wrote to them when they were first starting out, and
I was like, I have a podcast too, and they
they gave me a shout out on their third episode,
so I think that's what Tory might have heard.

Speaker 2 (09:26):
That's so cool. I love tea Mom only teen mom oji.

Speaker 1 (09:30):
Oh see, I like both. But we'll have to talk
offline about something, Okay, I put it in Tory says,
of course, I love all things Judy, but also loved
when you read The Luckiest Girl, as that was a
Judy adjacent book that I read and re read at
my grandma's house every summer along with Beverly's Sister of

(09:50):
the Bride. This past summer, I read Beverly Cleary's memoirs
for the first time, and they got me out of
a serious reading slump that I had been going through. Posts.
I highly recommend them. Jody and Molly, I'm so glad
you're back for another season. Oh we are too. Yes. Anyway,
here's the real point of my writing. I have a

(10:12):
suggestion for your next book. Okay, I am a huge
fan of the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High. Oh
my god, Yes, you might say it's a bit of
a hyperfixation for me. I wasn't born until nineteen ninety two,
but my gen X parents showed it to me when
I was in high school and it's been my comfort

(10:32):
movie ever since. I've kind of gotten my husband on
board too, and we watch it at least once a
year and we're into very nuanced discussions about it. Spoiler alert.
My research reveals that one of the cheer bunnies in
the movie is Bruce Springsteen's sister, and there's also several
Bruce Springsteen references in the movie.

Speaker 2 (10:52):
Whoa.

Speaker 1 (10:52):
I did not catch that whoa. Last night at dinner,
my husband was talking about a podcast he came across
that was discussing the movie, and that got me thinking,
I don't know if you know, but Fast Times was
originally a series in Playboy and then a.

Speaker 2 (11:08):
Book by Cameron Crowe. I think several.

Speaker 1 (11:13):
Years ago my husband bought me a copy of the
original Playboy issue it appeared in, as well as the book,
which is out of print from eBay. I want to
suggest Fast Times as your next book. I think It
would be especially fun because the book is out of print,
so it's not anyone can just pick up a copy
at the library and read it for themselves. It would
be so fun to hear all of the special reports

(11:33):
about high school life in the eighties, and of course
you get the added bonus of comparing the book to
the movie or even the Playboy articles with a special report.
If I haven't convinced you yet, my third argument is
that after Harriet the Spy and Double Fudge, I'm ready
for you to switch it up with something more mature
for your next book. Wow, wasn't I so convincing? I
hope so love another endorse words Tory. Oh, that is

(11:57):
such a good idea.

Speaker 2 (11:58):
It is. I'm looking at it now. I think we'd
have to start a GoFundMe because the cheapest copy I
can see is two hundred and thirty dollars. So I
really like, I don't want to shoot any idea down,
And now I'm desperate to read this book. But oh
my god, Oh, Hatchie, Tachi or Tory, if you really

(12:22):
want us to cover this book, send up your copy.

Speaker 3 (12:25):
Oh.

Speaker 2 (12:26):
Actually, I'm looking now on scribbed and I think there
is a pdf we could download. Okay, all is not lost? Yeah,
this is great. I've only seen this movie one time. Uh,
so this would be excellent for This would be all
new for me.

Speaker 1 (12:43):
I would be really excited. I love Fast Times. I
don't watch it every year, but I have watched it
a lot. Oh my god, this is perfect, Tori. These
are the kind of suggestions.

Speaker 2 (12:53):
Yeah, we love And they used to call my brother
Spacoli in uh middle school, So this would be perfect
because he was like, they thought he was a stoner
and then he's like, I'll show you and then became
an actual stoner. But I think it is a source subject.
But yeah, that's my only relationship with this. Cool. Oh

(13:13):
I forgot Sue said something about uh Norma Klein and
I posted a picture of Beginner's Love on bloom Saloon
Instagram today. Somebody wrote, let me see who to attribute
this great quote to. Jennifer Kathleen Gibbons said, Oh, Beginner's

(13:33):
Love makes Forever look like Pat the Bunny. So funny.

Speaker 1 (13:39):
So yeah, that's what we're looking for.

Speaker 2 (13:42):
Buy shit up.

Speaker 1 (13:43):
I want to become uncomfortable, me do.

Speaker 2 (14:03):
Now we're ready to move on to a segment called
what was the most Judy bloom thing that happened to
you this week. By the way, if anyone has a
pitch for a shorter PITHI or name for this segment
that you ger will know. That's a mouthful. But Jody,
it's the most Judy bloom thing that happened to you
this week.

Speaker 1 (14:22):
Okay. I was gonna say something about farting at a
at a fundraiser gala in my finest sequence.

Speaker 2 (14:35):
But but you're but that's not what you want.

Speaker 1 (14:40):
Well, maybe I'll just say it. I'll do too, Okay,
I'm allowed to do too. Yes. So I went to
this fundraiser gala for a school my friend teaches that
to help support the kids. And I dress up in
my finest, skin tight gold sequin gown with but skims.

(15:03):
You know, skims.

Speaker 2 (15:05):
I want to buy skims so badly.

Speaker 1 (15:07):
They are so hard to put on. I never I
never knew. So going to the bathroom was difficult, and
I had been saving it. I was like, I can
go to I can afford to go to the bathroom
once this entire night. The food they served was very
It was pasta with like barrada so much cheese. Tyler

(15:31):
and I were looking at each other like and then
at the end it was Tira missuit and I go
to the bathroom and I squeeze out of my skims
and I'm just peeing. But it's just like a lot
of barroom and it was echoing, and nobody was in

(15:55):
the bathroom, thank god. But I just have this vision
of myself as Sandy Pressman from WiFi. It seems like
something that would happen to Sandy. She'd be at the
club in her finest gown and she'd be litting one
rip that someone would walk in and then she'd be like.

Speaker 2 (16:11):
Oh, oh, you in Wify. Somebody would probably be disgusting
about it. They'd be like, oh, that's a real woman,
and then she'd be like, oops, I'm fucking one of
my friends again. Whoops. I That is truly my favorite
part of Wifey is how much she like tripped and
fell on Dick. That this wild part. Yeah yeah, but.

Speaker 1 (16:34):
Oh okay, well the second thing I was gonna say,
wasn't that exciting? But it is this I think is
more Judy. So like, as we've talked about, I'm moving,
you guys, I'm moving across the street, which is insane
and so doing a lot of packing because we're like,

(16:54):
we can do this move ourselves, we can save money,
but just taking forever. And I'm getting that, like that
feeling of nostalgia for something that like I haven't left yet,
you know what I mean. I'm being super dramatic and
madelid about it. I'm like, oh, this is the last
time I'll be taking a shower at nine point fifteen
on a Tuesday in this very house, like looking at

(17:18):
the walls, like I'm gonna miss this paint chip that
drove me crazy for nine years, or this door that
never shuts all the way.

Speaker 2 (17:25):
Oh, that makes me sad, because you will, you will.

Speaker 1 (17:29):
And then I felt that was very judy in terms of, like,
it's something I feel like teens getting angsty about too,
so I felt very teenagery. And then I looked up
the name for this phenoment on It's anticipatory nostalgia. So
this refers to feeling nostalgic for something that hasn't happened yet,
like a future loss or change, which can evoke a

(17:52):
sense of longing for the good aspects of what is
yet to be lost.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
Ooh, that is such a beautiful, like melancholy feeling. Wow.

Speaker 1 (18:03):
No, it was very emo, and that led me to
a very cool word, anamoya, which describes the feeling of
nostalgia for a time or place you've never experienced, which
is why we're here. I mean, this is what we're doing.

Speaker 2 (18:22):
Well, you're so right. I was never a teen in
the seventies, and yet I yearn.

Speaker 1 (18:27):
We yearn, we mourn, we crave.

Speaker 2 (18:32):
That's that's a perfect answer. Those are both perfect answers.

Speaker 1 (18:37):
Thank you. I'd like to hear your perfect answer.

Speaker 2 (18:39):
Okay, my answer is perfect, but is well, I'm not
even going to couch anything. So the most study bloom
thing to me that happened to me this week is
I think I've got a little crush starting. So it's
with this this sound dumb, It's with this man uh

(19:03):
in my pickleball league. Because here here's the thinking. Dating
apps are awful cesspools, and the only way I've gotten
laid in the past year has been via an adult
pickleball league. So I'm hoping lightning strikes twice. And I

(19:24):
met this person in the I've only been to like
three games or practices or whatever of this, and I
met him the first time and all all of the
pickleball people went out for drinks and then this time
like I saw him again and he remembered my name
and he like clapped me on the shoulder and we
were just like having a good time talking and it

(19:44):
was really cool, and he like kind of asked for
my number but didn't really follow up with it. So anyhow,
we all go out for drinks after pickleball, and as
we're leaving, he like comes running after me. He's like Molly,
and I'm like, oh my god, what's about to happen?
Holy fuck? Yeah, and he's like, oh, can I have

(20:06):
ride home. It's just like I did drive him home,
and I did feel like a little thrill of like,
oh yeah, he's in my car. Ooh he wants me
to drive him home. So it's like it's very very nascent,
and it doesn't feel as like batshit overwhelming as other

(20:28):
crushes I've had in recent memory. But it is kind
of cool to be like this is a very like
wholesome way to meet somebody in twenty twenty five, and
there's something like very cute and you know, even if
it doesn't go anywhere the potential of a crush, but
is fun too.

Speaker 1 (20:45):
I think the car ride is a very good start, right.

Speaker 2 (20:49):
Because he could have taken a like lift, it would
truly been like a sub ten dollars lift, but he
wanted to take the car ride, and he laughed at
my joke that I made.

Speaker 1 (21:00):
Can I ask what your joke?

Speaker 2 (21:01):
Yes? And honestly, I want to say something. I feel
like I'm on top of the flirting game lately and
nobody is giving me any any being receptive to it.
But I feel great about what I'm putting out there
is I have to wear glasses to drive because I
can't really see super well at night when I'm driving.
And so I he got in the car and sat

(21:23):
next hand. I was like, listen, don't do not be
too turned on right now. I need you to restrain
yourself because when you see me in these glasses, that's
gonna be it for you. Okay, So just like calm
down and I put on the glass and they're like
very ugly glasses. He was like, oh, I see what

(21:44):
you mean, little thinka.

Speaker 1 (21:49):
I feel like by the next time we talk, like
there'll be some progress.

Speaker 2 (21:54):
I hope. So because I have been I did, I
have been thinking about it today and it's frustrating because
I'd like, don't he said like, oh, we should exchange
numbers and then didn't like pull out his phone, so
I don't have a contact for him. And it's like
gotten to the point where I'm like, should I go
to open pickleball just like hoping he'll also be there?

(22:14):
That feels wild, But anyway, I'll let you know that's
a very grue It's.

Speaker 1 (22:18):
Something I would do.

Speaker 2 (22:20):
No shame, no shame. Okay, well, should we get into
these chapters?

Speaker 1 (22:26):
Let's do it? Yay ll ok.

Speaker 2 (22:32):
Okay. We've got the usual suspects. We've got Peter, older brother, Fudge,
younger brother, Tutsie youngest sister, Mom and dad Hatcher who
are their parents, and Grandma Muriel who is their grandma.
And Turtle the dog, who we remember was only bought

(22:52):
as a replacement for a living turtle that Fudge swallowed
hole anyhow. Then we have the Tubmans, which is Sheila
who is Peter's age. Libby is there too, but she's
only vaguely mentioned in this In this chapter set, we
have Missus Tubman, Mister Tubman, mister Tublin's dad, Buzzy Senior,

(23:18):
who is Grandma's contemporary and their little puppy, Jake, who
is also only sideline mentioned. Then the next people who
are in the house are Jimmy Fargo who is Peter
and Sheila's age, and his transient father, Frank Fargo, who
is an artist. And then two new bombshells entering the villa.

(23:39):
We have our close personal friend and correspondent, Bicycle Bob,
who we know is based on bicycle Bob Shields of
Southwest Cycles. And then we have Tony Ikel, who is
the son of mister Ikele who runs the ice cream shop.
And those are our new people this time.

Speaker 1 (24:02):
That's all our role call perfect, Thank you my pledge. Okay,
chapter eleven, it's called the ia F Club. So remember
Jimmy and his dad had rolled up last night. It's
their first morning in Maine, and he is just he's
in it. Sheila's like in her bunny slippers. She's waltzing. Okay,

(24:25):
Sheila's always waltzing.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
Me noticed love it.

Speaker 1 (24:30):
We get Fudge, who was on his A game this morning.
He's counting its cheerios and he's saying some pretty amazing things.
I think we should read this, yes right away. Okay,
So Sheila gets a good morning kiss from Grandpa Buzzy
Buzzy Senior. Sorry, and then Fudge leads over and says,

(24:50):
god marner, honey, and he kisses her on her other cheek.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
Jimmy says, what is this camp kissy face?

Speaker 1 (24:58):
You wish? Oh?

Speaker 2 (25:00):
I really wish she was my babysitter.

Speaker 1 (25:04):
But maybe she's going to be my wife too.

Speaker 2 (25:08):
Wife.

Speaker 1 (25:09):
Maybe nothing's definite yet.

Speaker 4 (25:12):
It all depends on Mitzi Mitzi. She's my friend. She
has monstrous spray. She's trying to get some for me.

Speaker 1 (25:21):
Then I won't have to get married. And he's just
going on and on.

Speaker 4 (25:27):
Buzzy Senior and Grandma are best friends, but they don't
sleep in the same room.

Speaker 2 (25:33):
Why don't you save the morning report till after breakfast?

Speaker 4 (25:36):
I can't.

Speaker 2 (25:37):
I might forget Bess the milk please take.

Speaker 4 (25:40):
We'll roll over if you give her cheddar cheese, But
if you give turtsy cheese, she spits it out.

Speaker 2 (25:46):
Okay. Peter says that's it. Jimmy doesn't want to hear anymore.
Jimmy wants to have his breakfast in peace.

Speaker 1 (25:54):
Wait, I'm not finished.

Speaker 2 (25:56):
Oh yes you are.

Speaker 4 (25:58):
Baby works at Nickles ice cream barlor. She puts extra
sprinkles on my cone. And Pete got dizzy from Izzy
at the library.

Speaker 2 (26:11):
And Peter grabs the front of Fudge's sweatshirt and says
one more word, and I'm gonna let you have it.

Speaker 1 (26:16):
Ooker, What was that about Peter getting dizzy?

Speaker 2 (26:20):
That was a joke.

Speaker 4 (26:21):
He felt like he was floating.

Speaker 1 (26:25):
Madness ensues, there's a chase, there's some yelling, Tootsies just shrieking.

Speaker 2 (26:32):
Uh.

Speaker 1 (26:32):
Grandma knows how to put an end to this funny business,
and she bangs a pot with a spoon and everyone
shuts the fuck up. But Sheila cannot let a good
thing go. And then again she's waltzing around the living
room and she's singing a song about Peter getting dizzy
from Izzy at the library. Lah di dah, maybe it's love.

(26:59):
And then Jimmy, that trader, he takes Sheila's side. He's like, hey, Peter,
it sounds like love to me. And Jimmy so rude,
but this part kills me. And Sheila says that she
has seen Izzy and she has curly hair and a
fat behind my ideal woman. Yes, she says, it wiggled

(27:24):
when she walks, and then she does like a Izzy
walking impression, but she looks more like a waddling duck instead.
Oh love this big ass girl.

Speaker 2 (27:33):
Yes, fat bottom girls make the rock and world go round.

Speaker 1 (27:37):
One of our own, Yes exactly.

Speaker 2 (27:42):
Oh my gosh, but it is so you know what
is so cute about all this, It's like you can
tell how juiced Sheila is to have another person her
age around. Yeah, like she's really coming alive. And I
that makes me sad because it's like, oh, buddy, you
pretended you didn't need a friend, but you really did.

Speaker 1 (28:03):
Yeah, it's true. They hatch a plan to go ride
bikes to go spy on Izzy, and Peter just freaks out.
He runs upstairs to his room and stews about it.
He is pissed because first of all, Jimmy is here
to visit him, and second Jimmy hates Sheila.

Speaker 2 (28:25):
So what gets that's so sad?

Speaker 1 (28:30):
I don't know. I feel like this dynamic is classic though.
It's like with three people and then the two people
bonding over teasing the person they have in common.

Speaker 2 (28:39):
It's very just as long as we're together, Yes exactly.

Speaker 1 (28:43):
I was thinking that and also thinking very current season
of White Lotus so true with the women on their girls.

Speaker 2 (28:51):
True, Yes, absolutely? Wow?

Speaker 1 (28:55):
Is this just kind of like a rule of three friends?
Like you have to work really hard to keep it
like even in chill or else? Will it just like
devolve into you know, two versus one naturally? Is there
like a lot of physics?

Speaker 2 (29:08):
Like sure? Seems like wow? Yikes, wow, deep scary.

Speaker 1 (29:14):
Jimmy and Peter make up. Jimmy's very sweet, he apologizes
and said he just kind of feels sorry for Sheila.
She's like alone.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Jimmy's very sweet, he is.

Speaker 1 (29:26):
I think he's a sensitive boy.

Speaker 2 (29:27):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (29:29):
So then they all decide to get on their bikes
and have a day. Sheila starts off with a bang
by bragging about her bike safety knowledge because she went
to some sort of bike safety class.

Speaker 2 (29:39):
Do we think Sheila is like extra showing off because
Jimmy's here, or is it just that we haven't hung
out with Sheila one on one that much this book
that we're just like noticing it a bunch.

Speaker 1 (29:51):
I think the first one, I think she's extra showy
offye Oh, I really to the crush on them both.

Speaker 2 (29:59):
I don't know, challengers right, Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 1 (30:03):
I agree, But Peter's like, I don't want to hear this.
He just speeds off on his own petals, faster and.

Speaker 2 (30:10):
Faster and faster. Rage biking up a hill.

Speaker 1 (30:14):
Oh god, yes, like almost like peloton biking. Just the
sweat and the faces, and he's gasping her air. He's
like cursing Jimmy and Sheila and her stupid face. And
then this iconic moment happens. I struggled to make it

(30:37):
to the top of the hill without slowing down. I
was breathing as hard as I could when something flew
into my mouth. I coughed, I get ACKed it. I swallowed.
I think it was a fly. I think I swallowed
a fly. I gagged again and breaked so hard I
flew off my bike. Lucky for me, I was wearing

(30:58):
a helmet and landed in the softer on the side
of the road.

Speaker 2 (31:03):
Oh oh God.

Speaker 1 (31:06):
If there's one thing I remember about this book, it's
him swallowing a fly. Oh I'm glad we made it there.

Speaker 2 (31:12):
What happened? I swallowed something. I think it was a fly,
a fly. It was going really fast, breathing guard and
it flew right in my mouth.

Speaker 1 (31:25):
How do you know it was a fly?

Speaker 2 (31:27):
What else could it be?

Speaker 5 (31:29):
A bee, a moth, a small bird.

Speaker 2 (31:34):
That would be my nightmare. It wasn't a small bird,
and a bee would have stung me. I'm almost sure
it was a fly.

Speaker 1 (31:45):
Ew that's so gross.

Speaker 2 (31:48):
What should we do?

Speaker 1 (31:52):
We'll take him to bicycle Bob. He'll know what to do.
I think, no, you're not. Just get back on your
bike and keep your mouth shut.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
Maybe he should keep it open just in case the
fly wants to get out.

Speaker 1 (32:05):
It's too late for that.

Speaker 2 (32:07):
How do you know?

Speaker 1 (32:09):
All right? Fine, keep your mouth open if you want.

Speaker 2 (32:14):
So.

Speaker 1 (32:15):
They roll up the bicycle Bob and Sheila says, Bob,
we have an emergency.

Speaker 5 (32:20):
Hey, guys, what's happening.

Speaker 2 (32:23):
I was riding my bike really fast and I breathing really.

Speaker 1 (32:27):
Are fly flew into his mouth and he swallowed it.

Speaker 5 (32:32):
Hey, welcome to the club. The club, Yeah, the IAF club.

Speaker 2 (32:39):
What's the ISAF club?

Speaker 1 (32:41):
The I swallowed a fly club? I'm a member myself.

Speaker 2 (32:46):
You swallowed a fly.

Speaker 1 (32:47):
I'm approaching the half dozen mark. It's hard to pedal
fast and keep your mouth shut at the same time.

Speaker 2 (32:54):
Do you think he needs X race? Yeah?

Speaker 1 (32:57):
He needs ice cream?

Speaker 2 (33:00):
Ice cream?

Speaker 6 (33:02):
Yeah, go next door to Ickles and get yourself vanilla cones.
Why vanilla, it's the best cure for swallowing live insects,
unless you don't like vanilla.

Speaker 1 (33:13):
In which case and Ella's fine.

Speaker 6 (33:16):
Good you got money, No, I've got enough. Then you're
all set. Give me your name and address and I
could notify you about our.

Speaker 2 (33:25):
Meetings, sweat meetings.

Speaker 5 (33:28):
The IAF club meetings.

Speaker 2 (33:30):
Oh right, that's so sweet that he offers the money.
That's really cute. But of course it's like the seventies
of the nineties, so how much could it cost? Like
three nichols? But still very thought that counts.

Speaker 1 (33:46):
In bicycle Bob's letter, he said.

Speaker 2 (33:49):
He said a b. He said he swallowed a b
and it.

Speaker 1 (33:52):
Stung him that or that would be too scary for
this book.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
That would be too scary for this book. I'm still
I feel like bees in children's media get a really
bad rap and they don't need another knock.

Speaker 1 (34:06):
So yeah, croo save the bees.

Speaker 2 (34:08):
Yes, wait, can I say something backtrack about bicycle Bob.
Bicycle Bob says he like fixed Judy bloom'spike. They were
chatting and he told her about the bee thing, and
then months later he got this book. How wild would
that be if you had small talk with a customer
once and then you were a whole ass speaking character

(34:31):
in the book. Isn't that crazy? That is?

Speaker 1 (34:34):
And then forever more children would come and want to
talk to you.

Speaker 2 (34:38):
He's like a very good sport about it. But that
is really funny that she's like, eh, putting that in
the memory hole for forever. I love that.

Speaker 1 (34:47):
So yeah, at Nichols they get their cones. Peter gets vanilla,
Jimmy gets chocolate, and Sheila gets strawberry. Very important. Libby's
not there. It's off, I guess. So they get served
by the owner's son, Tony, and he recognizes Sheila as
Libby's sister and says that Libby's a great girl in quotes,

(35:11):
oh my god, and was like what. So Peter's like,
has this world gone mad?

Speaker 2 (35:17):
Everybody's horny in Southwest Harbor.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
May So after their cute little ice cream sash in
the park, they go to the library, but Peter refuses.
Oh he has wants nothing to do with this. But
he thinks to himself as he waits, They're probably gonna
tell Isabelle about the fly. She'll probably come out to

(35:41):
see if I'm okay. She'll remind me about the baseball
book I put on hold, and if she looks at
me that way that she did the other day, I'll
get dizzy again. Then Jimmy and Sheila will know the truth.

Speaker 2 (35:53):
Oh my god, such a familiar anxiety thought spiral. It's like,
have anxiety, have fantasy. I feel this, you know What's
so funny? And damned if I didn't literally just tell
on myself earlier. It's like, so much of having a
crush is espionage, Like so much of not being a
crush is like figuring out where they're gonna be, think,

(36:17):
filling in the blanks of like what they're doing, but
also trying so hard equally to have them see you
and then to never perceive you. It's like such a dance,
Such a dance.

Speaker 1 (36:28):
Oh, I was the ultimate stalker in high school. I
used to I'm sure I talked about this because this
is a very judy thing. But my friend worked in
the attendant's office, so she had access to like everybody's
schedule in the entire school, and she would pull the
schedules of the boys I requested, so I would know

(36:51):
which way to walk down when.

Speaker 2 (36:53):
Oh my god, would you make contact with them, would
you be like, oh my god, oh Jake, you're here.

Speaker 1 (36:59):
No, it totally.

Speaker 2 (37:00):
When I was in high school, my friend had this
crush on this boy. Never knew what his real name was.
We called him the duck guy because he had like
a mullet that like flipped up in the back like
a duck's tail, and so we called him duck guy.
And so anytime we would see duck Guy in a perifer,
we'd be like, duck guy, let's go, and we like

(37:22):
follow him for no reason.

Speaker 1 (37:25):
We would follow him.

Speaker 2 (37:26):
In our mind feet and feet behind him in reality,
probably like one person's length behind him, and we would
like follow him in giggling and be like, oh my god,
I should say something to you, and he would like
always eventually turn around because we were laughing at him,
and we would run. Teenagers would turntail and run. Never

(37:48):
met this man, never said hello, never any contact. We
were just like the duck guy. We must follow him.
I love that I was he older. Maybe he sure
wasn't in any of our classes. She just had a
crush on him, so we had to follow him.

Speaker 1 (38:07):
You're a beautiful wing man, I guess something, or I'm
certifiable you know, the line's thin fable.

Speaker 2 (38:17):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (38:19):
So later that evening there's a cookout dinner. Everyone knows
about the fly. At this point, it's like talk of
the town. But Futch is not impressed.

Speaker 2 (38:29):
Oh because for once he's not the center of attention.
Oh so sorry, And.

Speaker 1 (38:34):
He has to bring it right back around to him
because remember that fucking monster swallowed.

Speaker 2 (38:40):
A turtle, turtle, a living turtle, and.

Speaker 1 (38:43):
He's gloating about it. He has no remorse. I just
he thinks it's funny.

Speaker 4 (38:48):
We have to read this, Okay, what's so great about
swallowing a fly? One time I swallowed a turtle. We
know I had to go to the hospital. We know
everybody was worried and sad. Toue.

Speaker 2 (39:07):
Nobody was sad but me because it was my turtle.
I remember that turtle you went and met my birthday party?

Speaker 1 (39:15):
Paul, Lease, can we talk about something else. I'm trying
to enjoy my supper.

Speaker 6 (39:21):
Ha.

Speaker 1 (39:24):
That's how turtle got his name, right, Pete.

Speaker 2 (39:27):
Yeah, I named my dog after my first pet to
remind me of what you did to him.

Speaker 4 (39:32):
Oh, turtles are so tasty boiled, bigd a.

Speaker 2 (39:35):
Rack, cut it out. You can't make me Oh, yes,
I can. I reached out, grabbed him, and I poured
my whole cup of juice over his head. Which it's
not nice. That's really not nice. You should get in
big trouble for that. But then, uh, Fudge looked surprised.

(39:56):
How could you do that to me? It was easier
than I thought, slammed him, got him slammed.

Speaker 1 (40:04):
Wait, so juice on his head? And then what else
was dumped on Fudge's head?

Speaker 2 (40:09):
So Fudge is he was eating cereal in a bowl
off the ground and dad got mad and poured poured
the cereal bowl on his head. So I think, unfortunately,
I do think Fudge is going to grow up with
like dunk tank related anxiety, Like this is fucked up.
You should not be doing this to another person, especially

(40:30):
shouldn't if you're an adult, but even if you're a
fellow child, like that is mean. That's bad. And I
say that as somebody who's to bite my brother full
in the face. So if I think it's bad, it's bad.

Speaker 1 (40:41):
Oh man, So that is chapter twelve? Wow, I mean
chapter eleven.

Speaker 2 (40:49):
This is chapter twelve. Any thoughts on chapter eleven before
we move on? Oh?

Speaker 1 (40:55):
I just wanted to ask if you're a member of
any special club, like, oh, anything weird that there's a
few people out there that might relate, Like, gosh, so
I have one I can maybe kickstart this. I am
the I am a member of the p L I
K Club, and that is pencil lead in knee club.

Speaker 2 (41:20):
I bet there are a lot of people in this club.

Speaker 1 (41:23):
I've met a few and I'm like, wait, how are
we all jamming pencils into our knees?

Speaker 4 (41:29):
Oh?

Speaker 2 (41:29):
My gosh, like it?

Speaker 1 (41:31):
But yeah, it's a thing, and mine is still in there.
You can very well, you can see it very clearly.

Speaker 2 (41:37):
I bet the like pencil lead under cutaneous subcutaneous layer
is a big club because I have known several adults
with pencil lead embedded in their body. Not in the
knee though, But that's like so specific, Like did you
have like jeans that had holes in the knee and
you were just like jamming your pencil layer.

Speaker 1 (41:57):
Plus I don't I have no memory, I worry of
it happening, but I just remember afterwards my mom that
night was trying to like get out the lead with
a water pick, just like blasting my knee with a
water pick.

Speaker 2 (42:13):
Wait, that's so so smart didn't work. Oh shoot oh
and they always told you like, don't do that because
that's how you get lead poisoning. So I'm glad you're okay.

Speaker 1 (42:23):
Yeah, Well it turns out it's graphite.

Speaker 2 (42:24):
Oh it jokes on them, let's see. Okay, I might
be a member of the s I C Club, the
Stitches in Chin club.

Speaker 1 (42:40):
Yeah. Bike accident, monkey bars.

Speaker 2 (42:43):
Mine was on a tottle bike, a real life tottle bike,
and it was like a little kid's toy that you know.
The handle goes up and it becomes a bike, but
you pull the handle down and it becomes a wagon.
And I was scooting along the sidewalk and I leaned
on the handle and it became wagon and I dropped
on the concrete.

Speaker 1 (43:03):
It transformed, I transformed under.

Speaker 2 (43:05):
My very body and I hit the concrete and I
got stitches. And then my brother got stitches similar way.
He like fell on ice while skating. And so both
of us are the SIC club. And I've met other
adults who are that, but I really have to cook
on that. I wonder if there's some other things, but yeah,
Blue Meads, let us know if you're in part of

(43:26):
exclusive clubs.

Speaker 1 (43:28):
Yeah, we can matchmake you guys.

Speaker 2 (43:30):
Oh, that'd be fun. It could be like twin flames
and just like force every member of our club to
date each other. That's a great idea. Chapter twelve, which

(43:58):
is baby Feet. So mister Fargo is really making himself
at home in this vacation house he didn't pay for
contribute to. He's setting a canvas out and the grass
in the backyard and setting a big ladder up and
he climbs to the top of the ladder and he
pours the blue paint on the canvas. Now, I'm kind

(44:21):
of surprised that Peter isn't worried about this the way
that he was worried about the rock garden, because famously,
rocks can be moved. But if you get blue paint
on the side of somebody's house or god forbid, on
their lawn fixtures, that's a little tougher.

Speaker 1 (44:36):
Good point, yeah, a real good point.

Speaker 2 (44:38):
I think sometimes when adults do stuff, Peter's like, well,
that must be above board because adult, but he would
do well. I think to have a little more skepticism
where mister Fargo is concerned. But there's this blue painting
going on, and one day Sheila is screaming, missus Hatcher,
come quick. Fudge is all blue, and everybody's initial instinct

(45:02):
is like, oh, he got stuck in the paint. His
face is streaked with blue. His shirt is all blue,
his hands are blue. He's like crazy blue, and he's
like not feeling good. And what it turns out is
he ate all the blueberries.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
I don't think it's paint. Did you eat up all
the blueberries?

Speaker 2 (45:22):
You ate blueberries? Jimmy and I were on her knees
more than two hours picking them, and Grandma's gonna make
us a pie.

Speaker 4 (45:30):
I didn't eat them all.

Speaker 2 (45:33):
Turtle HiT's you fed turtle blueberries?

Speaker 1 (45:37):
He liked them.

Speaker 2 (45:39):
Turtle's a dog. And he goes up to Turtle, who
is hiding guiltily, and he says, let me see your tongue,
and sure enough, he opens Turtle's mouth and it's all blue. Boy,
are you gonna be sick?

Speaker 1 (45:55):
I already am my Timey hurts so bad. I'm not surprised.

Speaker 2 (46:02):
I know exactly what he needs. And she goes and
gets the peppermint medicine because Judy doesn't want to name
check peptobismo, and she says, down the hatch, how about
some fra turtle. What that what's good for the goose
is good for the gander, and they give turtles.

Speaker 1 (46:21):
She's not giving a don pepto, is she?

Speaker 4 (46:24):
Yeah?

Speaker 2 (46:25):
But don't worry. I did look it up and according
to one Google search, dogs could have peptobismo.

Speaker 1 (46:31):
Okay, okay, I worry for these animals on the hatch
your hand.

Speaker 2 (46:38):
Listen. I think the seventies was a time where animals
lived near you and that was as much as you
ever did for them. They that you just coexisted with
your pet, and if they lived, they lived, and if not,
well that was none of your business. I really get
that impression. It was only like in like, didn't you
guys do a special report that. It wasn't until like

(46:59):
the mid seventies that people are like, hey, you should
pick up after your dog when they shit on the street.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
Oh yeah, our famous dog poop special report, Like never
forget curb your dog.

Speaker 2 (47:11):
They were just like, nih, they're here, we're here, let's
see what happens. Yeah, that's in the seventies. So yeah, anyhow,
they gave everybody Peptobysmo called it a day. Jimmy and
Peter tze Fudge about getting blue gurgling gas. Great, callback
Fudge is still sick, and everybody's kind of pitching him

(47:33):
ideas on how to feel better. Missus Tubmans is lie
on your tummy, which sounds like an awful idea. Oh
it sounds wrong, mister Tubmans says, hot water bottle closer.
Buzzy Senior says, make beautiful pictures in your mind. Which
Buzzy Senior put the bong down. That's a wild answer

(47:54):
to a child. That's weird. I don't like that. And
for once in his life, mister Fargo is the only
sane boys room, and he says, just throw it up.
Do you have a go to my tummy hurts remedy? Umm?

Speaker 1 (48:13):
No, I still haven't figured that out.

Speaker 2 (48:15):
Just be hurting.

Speaker 1 (48:17):
Yeah, no, yeah, please tell me if you have one.

Speaker 2 (48:20):
Well, I am pursuing sponsorship with Toms because I am
always packing tombs. I got purse toms, car tombs, desk tombs,
home tombs, so I'll pack the second I feel a
whiff of discomfort of any kind, I'm popping a tomb.
Love a tom?

Speaker 1 (48:39):
Do you do a preemptive tom?

Speaker 2 (48:42):
That would be so smart? No, but I will now
I'm gonna I'm gonna tomb it up. My friend used
to say that when your stomach hurts, you should drink beer,
and that used to make me feel better until beer
started being the thing that made my tummy earth, which
has been in recent years. So those were my only

(49:05):
two thoughts. So either take a tumb or chug a beer,
but results may vary. I think the mom of the
kids I used to babysit would always say, go sit
on the potty, and I do think that's maybe the
best advice. Is like, if you're not feeling good for
any reason, go sit on the potty, see if you
feel better, just like me at the gala. That is

(49:30):
such a unique womanly phenomenon of like unrolling the shape,
where and all of a sudden, just a volley of
body sounds are coming out. I don't know why Kim
doesn't talk about that in the ad campaign. Okay, uh
so Dad comes into this tableau and is like, what

(49:52):
did I miss because apparently he's been out since after
breakfast looking at sailboats because he want to take everybody
on a sailboat.

Speaker 1 (50:02):
I have no memory of this part.

Speaker 2 (50:04):
I remember this part only because I like in books
when there's description of food, and I remember there's description.

Speaker 1 (50:11):
Of food in this c Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2 (50:14):
So the people who decide they want to go on
the boat are Sheila, Peter, Jimmy Mister and Missus Tubman
and Grandma and those are the only people on the boat.
And Dad Buzzy Senior drops a bit of lore that
he fears the sea, and we're off and Mom stays
behind to take care of fudge. So they get on

(50:35):
this boat and I looked up nineteen footer sailboat and
it's really not that big for the amount of people.
So they're they're sitting cozy to each other.

Speaker 1 (50:45):
Looking it up.

Speaker 2 (50:46):
Now, Okay, yeah, it's not as big as you would want,
I don't think, but I've actually never been on a sailboat,
so maybe it feels bigger, bloomheads. Let me know. They
go through basic safety, which is everybody has to wear
a lifeboat the whole pardon me, a life preserver, what.

Speaker 4 (51:03):
Is that called?

Speaker 1 (51:03):
A life jacket, A life faster?

Speaker 2 (51:05):
Thank you? They have to wear a whole lifeboat. They
have to wear a life jacket, a life vest the
whole time. And if somebody falls overboard, you have to
point at them and say man overboard, and Sheila feminist
icons say could we not just say person overboard? Love

(51:27):
that for her. So they are out and about and
this is very funny because this is very like anxious mindset.
Jimmy starts getting nervous before they even go on, and
Peter's like, no, it's totally fine, don't worry about it.
And Jimmy's like, I don't know, I can't really swim,
and Peter goes, don't worry. You can't swim in this

(51:49):
water anyway, because it'll give you hypothermia. Peter explains hypothermia
that's when your body temperature falls really low. Most people
who die when they fall in the water die from that,
not drowning, Like, oh buddy, we didn't we didn't need
to know this, and it says I think Jimmy would

(52:09):
have jumped back onto the dock if we hadn't a
sailed away right then, poor Joe. Peter. I love that though.
I'm pretty sure that's where I learned about hypothermia as.

Speaker 1 (52:19):
Well, and also that it is a very peaceful death.

Speaker 2 (52:23):
Oh well, that's nice seeing you would have been right
there next to Jimmy and be like, actually, even if
you do die of hepudermia, it's so peachful because your
body releases chemicals right before and you just feel great. Okay, guys,
none of this is helping me. This is making it,
as we all say, worse.

Speaker 1 (52:41):
Uh.

Speaker 2 (52:42):
We have another patented judy detail for no reason that
I adore, which is missus Tubman loses her hat and
then pouts about it.

Speaker 1 (52:49):
The vision of this hat slowly bobbing away like I
really dwelled on that.

Speaker 2 (52:54):
I really liked that hat, so funny, so sad. And
then my favorite bar is they have lunch, so they
drop anchor and this is the lunch that they had.
Jimmy brought his favorite sardines, an onion, on rye. The
rest of us had cold chicken left over from last

(53:15):
night's dinner. The three of us polished off a bag
of chips, a box of cookies, and all the juice.
Then we hit the fruit and I wrote in the
margin here, God, damn, I love summer food so much.

Speaker 1 (53:28):
Yeah, this all sounds really good, except for the sardines
and onions.

Speaker 2 (53:33):
I know I have tried so diligently to like sardines,
and I just think it's never gonna happen, Dame, I
want to be a cute tinned fish gurly, but it's
just icky to me. And I don't like that there
was bones in it. But you're just supposed to crunch
and eat like a cartoon cat. No thanks.

Speaker 1 (53:53):
What kind of cookies do you think they were eating? Oh,
it's very important.

Speaker 2 (53:58):
So it comes in a box, So I wonder if
is that like a seventies thing or is that a
clue that they're like lovely fresh bakery cookies.

Speaker 1 (54:06):
Oh I feel like they're No, I think they're grocery
store like chips a Hoy. Yeah, I think that's that's
still a box, right.

Speaker 2 (54:15):
You know what. I am not in a cookie frequently
buying capacity, but I do believe it's like a pouch.
They come in like an oreo pouch. Oh I see,
but they might not have always so it does seem
like it does seem like mass amounts of cookies. So
maybe maybe it is like a chips a hoy or
maybe like a circus animals. But those are crackers, Oh yeah, no, no, no,

(54:41):
I'm thinking the pink iced ones.

Speaker 1 (54:43):
But they're still called animal crackers.

Speaker 2 (54:44):
Oh I didn't know that. Okay, Well, I think like
I can't escape the image of like it's gotta be
just like your classic stock image cookie with chocolate chips.

Speaker 1 (54:54):
Yeah, perfect, And.

Speaker 2 (54:55):
I did's the tiniest amount of research of like if
salt air action makes you more hungry, And the tiny
tiny bit of research I got was know that it's
like a psychological thing because a lot of us aren't seafarers,
so and it takes a lot of physical effort to

(55:17):
get out either onto the water or onto the beach,
so we're we're coming in tired, and we're coming in
having exerted ourself. And then sea air adjacent activities like
swimming and stuff like that, those also take it out
of you. And then usually when you're at these places,
other people are eating too, which makes you excited to eat.

(55:38):
And then normally the like foods that you eat in
these situations are like really like high value foods. So
it's like if everybody just ate like oatmeal at the beach,
you probably wouldn't be like, Wow, I'm starving, I can't
wait to eat oatmeal. But since everybody's eating like chips
and cookies and big fat peaches, it's like all of
those come together to be like, wow, gee, I guess

(56:00):
the beach makes me hungry. It's like, no, it's all
these other things.

Speaker 1 (56:04):
Yeah, it's very much like I earned this and you did.

Speaker 2 (56:09):
So they have their big lunch and Grandma wisely tells
everybody to take it easy because it does take a
long time to get back and you might be sick, or,
as Sheila's noticing, you might have to go to the bathroom,
and there's no place to go to the bathroom, which
that gave me instant anxiety.

Speaker 1 (56:26):
I'm surprised, Like she just couldn't beee behind a bush.

Speaker 2 (56:29):
Sure, so I had that thought too, And then I
reread it and it's this entire time I had pictured
them pulling up onto a sandbar or something and having
a picnic. No, they just anchor within sight of the island.
So they're still on the boat. So I think they
could have gone closer and her go pee in the woods,
but I don't think she would think that was better.

(56:52):
Yeah either, And then they're going back, but it's the
water is choppier, and it's getting colder, and it's getting dark.
And remember this is like the first nice other day
they've ever had in this two weeks, so of course
it's gonna turn. The boat is tipping and water is splashing,
and Jamie starts to feel seasick and he's trying to
keep Dad says, to keep his eye on the horizon.

(57:15):
Jimmy can't see the horizon. This is a horrifying description.
It says his eyes were rolling around in their sockets
and he was turning green. Grandma says, breathe through your nose.
That's always a good idea. And then this is bad, Like,
there's waters so choppy. The boat is really tipping. It says,

(57:36):
it tipped over so far the sails touch the water,
which what he's Louise, that's so what. Meanwhile Dad keeps going,
oh no, it's a keel boat. It can't flip over.
It can't flip over. It's like, well, dear, it's damn
near flipped over right now.

Speaker 1 (57:50):
That is so scary.

Speaker 2 (57:52):
It's so scary. But Grandma takes control. And Grandma is like, look,
there's a puff there off of wind. You have to
go like sail into the puff. It's like, okay, since Wendy,
you know what you're talking about.

Speaker 1 (58:07):
But all right, maybe at summer camp she talks sailing to.

Speaker 2 (58:10):
It wonder this makes a lot of sense. So everybody's scared.
Everybody's screaming. They're screaming for Dad to let Grandma take over.
And so finally he has a pouting fit and yells
and Grandma takes over. And Grandma, of course, is as
cool as a damn cucumber, and she takes control and

(58:32):
she's yelling orders and she's moving everything around, and suddenly
she's great at sailing, and she sails it right back
into the harbor, no problem. And the last thing they
have to do is have Dad jump out and tie
the rope to the dock, and she says, wait to
give the signal till we're close enough. And Dad is mad,

(58:55):
so he doesn't wait, and he jumps too soon and
he falls in the water. It was Chekhov's person overboard,
because now everybody's pointing at Dad ocause this is so funny.

Speaker 1 (59:10):
Part.

Speaker 2 (59:10):
We pointed at Dad. We pointed as some guy from
the dock reached into the water and pulled him out.
We pointed as someone else wrapped him in a blanket.
We pointed until Dad looked at us and said, Okay,
that's enough. You can stop pointing now, because he's cold hypothermia.

Speaker 1 (59:29):
It's peaceful. Remember it's peaceful.

Speaker 2 (59:31):
Dad, lean into it. I'll never let go Dad. So
they get home, Mom, Mom, shut the fuck up. My
mom asks Warren, how come you went swimming in your clothes? Yeah,
I'm so sure that's what happened. Mom.

Speaker 1 (59:53):
She knows.

Speaker 2 (59:54):
She's rude, so rude, she's so rude. Anyway, he's mad
and he storms off. Okay, now we get to the
reason the chapter is name this way. And Tootsy comes
over to Pete, and Pete picks her up, and he
noticed that the bottoms of her feet are covered in
blue and he asks if she got more blueberries, and

(01:00:24):
they say no, And they look and there is mister
Fargo's artwork with a little trail of baby footprints across it.
And so they're panicking because mister Fargo hasn't seen this,

(01:00:44):
and it's very scary until he comes around the corner
with Jimmy. He'd seen the footprints across the painting, and
his face turned purple. I held Tutsy tight and waited
for an explosion. Frank Mom began, but mister Fargo held
up his hand to stop from speaking. He got down
on all fours and crawled around his canvas. He stood

(01:01:04):
up and walked away from it. Then he came closer.
Then he walked away. Then he came closer, and he
squinted and he scratched his beard. We held our breaths.
Finally he said baby feet. I looked at Jimmy and
he shrugged as if to say, don't ask me baby feet.

(01:01:28):
He's like van sing on them. And Peter's so scared
he's like holding, he's holding to see the other way,
and mister Fargo continues the creep aright and goes it.
She bitch baby, she bitchy teeny weeny baby feet. I

(01:01:52):
think we've got something here. I think those little baby
feet of yours are going to be a big hit
that their rapp ends with. None of us knew what
he was talking about, but we were all relieved, like ooh,
that is a weird thing.

Speaker 1 (01:02:06):
To say, Like, okay, he's not gonna boil her in
a cauldron.

Speaker 2 (01:02:13):
Cool, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:02:18):
So uh.

Speaker 2 (01:02:19):
Later that night, the Jimmy and Peter got burned. Spoiler.
They put on noxima, which I also looked up and
is not a cure for sunburn. It's just like kind
of a cooling cold cream.

Speaker 1 (01:02:32):
Yeah, I remember Noxema, but I remember it for acne.

Speaker 2 (01:02:35):
I was gonna say the Noxema product I use was
the acne like little pads and those would feel like
absolute hell on the sunburns. Oh like burning, they truly,
I feel like on the box of the Noxima pads,
they were like, if it burns, it means it's working.

Speaker 1 (01:02:53):
Right.

Speaker 2 (01:02:54):
Yeah, we had so many acne products like that, like
the Saint ives, like apricot scrubs, like, no, you got
to buff off the first layer of your skin.

Speaker 1 (01:03:03):
My friend's little sister in the nineties used to she
thought it was stives, oh styves. She'd go get her
stives apricot scrub.

Speaker 2 (01:03:16):
That's so funny, stves.

Speaker 1 (01:03:18):
Oh my god, never not think of that.

Speaker 2 (01:03:21):
That's so cute. We get to this last part and
I'd like us I'll to read it because I think
it is a good example of men taking responsible.

Speaker 1 (01:03:31):
Yah, I'd like your attention for a minute.

Speaker 3 (01:03:37):
I behaved very badly this afternoon, and I want to
apologize to everyone on the boat, but mostly to Muriel,
who saved the day.

Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
Apology except it and it said that Peter was excited.
Dad was admitting that he was a sore loser, very
good role model. So when he looked over, I gave
him a high sign and he smiled. Am I too
young and vibrant to know what the.

Speaker 1 (01:04:01):
High sign is?

Speaker 2 (01:04:03):
Yeah? What is? Because I tried to look it up
and I got there is a like, uh I think
Charlie Chaplin movie called the high sign, and it's like
a very complicated like almost like Wakonda Forever like esque
hand motion. But I always pictured this as like the
okay hand movement, bloomheads, do you know what the high sign?

Speaker 1 (01:04:25):
I guess I maybe I pictured like a victory sign.
Oh I don't know. My brain just went smooth at
that part, but I would love to know.

Speaker 2 (01:04:34):
Yeah, let us know. Take pictures. Okay. Then mister Fargo
gets something. He says, I want to thank Tutsie for
walking across my canvas and giving me the idea for
a series of paintings called baby Feet. Not weird at all.

Speaker 1 (01:04:50):
Here here, let's have a toast of baby feet and
to Muriel who always saves the.

Speaker 2 (01:04:57):
Day, buzzy not in front of the children. And the
chapter ends with this. It says, somehow, I don't think
Grandma was talking about us, And she said children. I
think she met mom and dad and mister and missus Tubman,
because they were the only ones who looked surprised by
that kiss. Ooh, bump bump, What are doing it?

Speaker 1 (01:05:22):
Doing it?

Speaker 2 (01:05:24):
How long is this one going on? Wow? That is bananas? Okay, wow,
love it. Everyone's looking up.

Speaker 1 (01:05:35):
Yeah. Yeah. The weather has turned in Southwest Harbor. It's
like too much pollen in the air or something. I
don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:05:43):
Good chapters.

Speaker 1 (01:05:44):
Love it, good chapters.

Speaker 2 (01:05:47):
Okay, bloom heads.

Speaker 1 (01:05:49):
We will be back with the final two chapters in
two weeks. So get us your letters, tell us your thoughts,
tell us what the high sign is, tell us what
club you're in. Bloom Saloon at gmail dot.

Speaker 2 (01:06:04):
Com, uh huh, or on Instagram at the Bloom Saloon Podcast.

Speaker 1 (01:06:11):
Mollie is doing a great job manning our social media.

Speaker 2 (01:06:14):
Oh, thank you, I'm really trying.

Speaker 1 (01:06:16):
I'm loving what you're doing. Thank you.

Speaker 2 (01:06:20):
Yeah, I'm so excited for that. And then after that
we'll do an Odds and Ends episode. So if there's
anything you're thinking we're glazing over, let us know. I
want to put a pin in this subject for our
odds and Ends episode. Uh, what's the worst thing you
ever did to your siblings, because I was really reflecting
with the pouring the juice over the head of it all.
I've got some humdingers, I am mean.

Speaker 1 (01:06:43):
That is a good one. I can't wait. Yeah, okay, friends,
we'll see you in two weeks. Okay, bye bye.

Speaker 2 (01:07:01):
The is