The King Is Not Dead: Elvis Presley

Dust off your blue suede shoes and buckle up your rhinestone jumpsuit—this week, we’re diving hip-first into the swirling toilet bowl of conspiracy surrounding The King himself. Did Elvis really die on the throne in 1977, or was it all a cover-up to escape fame, debt, or the mafia? From sightings at a Burger King in Michigan to wild claims of government witness protection, we’re peeling back the velvet curtain to reveal the bizarre theories that suggest Elvis Presley never left the building.

🧠 Feeling like your life’s a bit more “Jailhouse Rock” than “Viva Las Vegas”? Talk to someone who gets it. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp—visit BetterHelp.com/Brohio to get 10% off your first month of therapy. It’s cheaper than faking your own death.

💰 Short on cash but still gotta shake, rattle, and roll? Don’t wait for payday. Download the EarnIn app and use code THEBROHIOPODCAST under PODCAST. That’s EarnIn, like “earning” without the G—because Elvis left the building, but your bills didn’t. Strap in, hound dogs—it’s time to question everything you thought you knew about the King of Rock ‘n’ Roll.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:17):
If you've got micro plastics, then you're freaking balls. You've
come to the right podcast. Welcome to the Brohio Podcast,
working on year number eight of deeply seated trauma and
emotional baggage we've been trying to unpack for many years

(00:38):
getting there. This is the most handsome man the entire world,
Robert Dog. I'm like top three top in this room.
Don't do that, dude. You know two of us. I'm
top three, also number three, Hello, top three handsomest men

(01:00):
room as well. I'm the delicious, nicolicious. Welcome in everybody.
We got a very big week plan for you as
we were covering or uncovering the death or not death
of the King Elvis Aaron Presley, the gayest man to ever.

Speaker 2 (01:19):
Dude, you have many Grandma poons. That guy slide a
lot of them. Dude, you have fucking much muff. He's
how much fucking puss for that guy's parted.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
This hot stinky Elvis ass. Oh man. We want to
say thank you to a few of our new patron subscribers,
starting off with Travis Dom. Looks like he shortened that
last name so he didn't sound so serial killer is
Travis Dahmer Travis. They call him Travis dump truck dam

(01:54):
because he's got a fucking ass. He's got cake. And
during our zoom chat, we met a lady who's legally blind.
She was getting married and the cake lady sent her
a picture of their cake. And the cake lady was
naked by accident. Oops. I don't know. There's a lot

(02:15):
of details or was it by accident. There's a lot
of details left there. Yeah, but that's what you're missing
out by not being in the Patreon zoom chats before
the show. So you can go to patreon dot com
slash Broyle Podcast and you'll find it there. One dollar.

Speaker 2 (02:30):
And next we got the guy who's showing his dick
off of his picture.

Speaker 1 (02:33):
Bryce, Thank you very much, nice cock, he looks at
showing his cock. Bryce, dude, I bet you write the
fucking nicest ass poetry. The dude's name Bryce. Definitely write poetry,
think so yeah, definitely? Okay, doesn't that seem like a
name like me? I met a nice boy named Bryce
and he writes poetry. I guess I could see that

(02:55):
if my girl, my daughters, any of them ever bring
home a dude named Bryce and he doesn't show up
on day one with some nice ass written poetry, don't
even try and think about getting in bed with my
one of my daughters. You ladies know you're worth Thanks Bryce,
We love you, appreciate you, buddy. How about k C. Harper, Acy,

(03:16):
I don't know if you are a man or a woman,
but you are a sensual lover and for that we
are very thankful, maybe the most sential lover of them all.
Kcy Harper, Because if I've ever heard a porno name,
that's a porno name.

Speaker 2 (03:37):
It is, which I was gonna say that, but it's a.

Speaker 1 (03:40):
Deep as a porno. That is a porn star with
a very big root or a very deep valley of
a vagina, very thick root. If you've got a thick root,
send us a picture of it to our email Brya
Podcast at gmail dot com. All right, we got a

(04:00):
live show October eleventh that stores open at six pm.
We're gonna be at the satellite of bro We're only
two months away Celestial beer Works. You can go to
brohio podcast dot com slash tickets to gobble up the
few remaining tickets. It's gonna be a great time. We're
gonna do some improv. We're gonna do some live performances.

(04:20):
You are gonna be part of the show. We're gonna
have merchandise. We're gonna have stickers, We're gonna have Girth Brooks.
Grandma's gonna be there, Bill Wilkins, They're all gonna be there.

Speaker 2 (04:33):
Gonna be a fucking treasure trove of fun.

Speaker 1 (04:37):
And it's gonna be a surprise of whether we're there
or not. We just fucking showed it. Everybody gets there,
it would be the end of this podcast. There was
like up. Sorry guys. An Argentine and an Argentine captured naked,
captured naked in his yard and Argentine captured naked in

(04:59):
his yard by a Google street View camera has been
award compensation by a court after his bear behind was
splashed over the Internet for all to see. The policeman
had sought payment from the Internet giant for harm to
his dignity, arguing he was behind a six and a
half foot tall wall when a Google camera captured him
while he was naked from behind in a small town

(05:22):
in Argentina in twenty seventeen. His house number and street
name were also laid bare broadcast in Argentine TV covering
the story. The man claimed invasion exposed him to ridicule
at work and amongst his neighbors. Another court last year
dismissed the man's claims for damages, ruling he only had
himself to blame for walking around in inappropriate conditions in

(05:46):
the garden of his home. Google Fritz Park claimed the
perimeter wall was not high enough. Appeals judges, however, concluded
that the man's dignity had been flagrantly violated and awarded
I'm an amount of Argentine peso's equivalent about twelve US
dollars payable. Is that worth it for you, dude? I

(06:08):
would stand on the fins and spread fucking asshole asshole
I would, dude. I would you know how like when
you pull your eyes to the side, you can see
double vision. I would have my butt cheeks spread apart
so fucking tight that you'd see two assholes. When you
drove by Google stream, you would see two assholes. I'd
have my cheeks spread apart so tightly the dude doing

(06:30):
the Asian eyes, you'd be doing Asian brown eye. I'd
have double, triple, quadruple asshole on Google streamview. They'd have
to blur the whole fucking street out, dude, And i'macs ass.
They're paying me more than twelve five. I know that
it should be wide. I would be pushing my little
gizzard out the back. You're gonna see the head of

(06:50):
my dick and my brown buttle all at once. I'm
getting paid. Oh shit. Um so yeah, Google, I had
to award this guy twelve thousand, five hundred dollars. You
know you can. Google also says if if there's a
part of Google street View that you would like blurt out,

(07:11):
you just type in report a problem. Okay, and my
home is actually blurred on Google two nice because my
cats broke the blinds and I don't want it to
look like a crack house. Yeah, so I blurted out
on Google. Cool because we don't smoke crack here. We
do a lot of stuff, but yeah, crack is not
one of them. Let's see here the pall wall. We

(07:35):
had some very nice submissions for the pall wall this week. Okay,
let's get into them. If so, you're probably saying, hey,
what's the pall wall? Well, behind us, we have pictures
of people's pets on the wall. And if you snail
mail us a picture of your animal, we'll put it
on the wall. It's called the Pall Wall. The Brohio

(07:56):
Podcast po Box six seven to two Vandelio Ohio. From
Ed and Heidi. We got a picture of beautiful little
Willow May from Francisco. I'm sorry I did not write
it down what you sent to us, and Cisco.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
Francisco, that's fun to say.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
Okay, Francisco, send us a picture of Clementine, a goddamn
lizard named Mango. And then these two beautiful bonded cats
named Penny and Norman. One has a pink nose, one
has a like a blackish brown nose. Thank you, Francisco,
appreciate it. And then Lindsay Truesdale, who sent us a
picture earlier a couple weeks ago. She's lost a ton
of weight, so congratulations Lindsay. But she also send us

(08:37):
pictures of Ruca and Verak, beautiful puppies as well. Fun
names too, And this one was the most confusing one
of all. We got a letter written in what appears
to be men's handwriting. Okay, it says my husband fucking
can't write letters, so he makes me do it. Thanks, guys,

(08:58):
But if you are a lady that wrote this, you
have handwriting like a lesbian. Sorry for you, this is
very confusing. Okay, these fucking animals, not the animals, the
animals that sent us this. They sent us a digital
picture frame. Isn't that so cool? I had to unplug

(09:21):
our ZEMA sign that's been lit up for a decade
to plug in this digital frame of these dogs. There's
a three thousand fucking pictures there dogs on here. I
can't ever. That's awesome. They also sent a twenty dollars bill,
which it's gonna have to go towards the electricity bill

(09:43):
of keeping this thing lit up until it stops running.
The dogs are Roxy, Rest in peace Roxy. And then
we got Lena or Lana and Penny. But like I said,
it says my husband fucking can't write letters, so he
makes me do it. My husband for an entire weekend

(10:04):
edited these pictures all and then it says awesome love
Joe and Art. And then it says we're very gay
for each other, just like you two. So that tells me, okay,
this is a man's handwriting, their husband's are gay. Yeah,
And then it says at least we have a vagina.
So are these lesbians? Are these gay people? Is this

(10:26):
a man and a wife? Yeah? Is this just a
wife with manly handwriting with really beautiful dogs? Yeah, and
enough disposable income that they can send us a fully
functioning digital art frame. Mind you. I had to go
in the settings myself and turn the brightness all the
way down because it wouldn't work with the brightness all

(10:48):
the way up. That motherfucker's running Android forty seven. So
I can use that thing for like porn hub and
shit if I have to on a pinch. Here's an
internet browser on there. Nice. I'm curious. How about is it?
Is it a two guys?

Speaker 2 (11:05):
I don't know there are two dicks? That's pretty hot
if there is.

Speaker 1 (11:08):
And then, last but not least, our friend cult whitmore
from vinyl Edge Graphics Cennis an awesome ass picture of
a dog dressed up as Paul Wall that says the
Bruhio podcast Paul Wall, right, And then he sent us
a picture. He sent us a picture of his dog, Nala.

(11:29):
He actually says, this is my bitch, Nala. Hell yeah,
she's very beautiful. Her teeth are showing she is right,
there the top to the left of the Paul wall.
She's got human teeth. He sent us all kinds of
vinyl stickers. He's so maybe check him out. He's at
uh Vinyl Edge Graphics. I think he might do car
wraps and ship too, ship. I don't know. Hell yeah,

(11:51):
there's a lot going on today. Nonetheless, we are doing
an episode on the truths that Elvis Prisley is still alive,
and we're gonna tell you all about that right after
a quick break or a few of our sponsors. Yeah, okay,
sponsors ever right there, get up on the pall wall.

(12:14):
We've got lots of beautiful dogs up there. We're running
in a room, Robert, I know we're getting there. Start
covering up. I had to cover a picture of Joe
Exotic bad Man. I will never cover up pictures of
my mom and dad. Yeah, you can't do that. There's
some up top we could cover up. We got some meme.
Well can't see up top. That's true, that's true. There's
a memal up there. We can't get rid of her. Yeah,
we're just gonna have to start closing in, right, can't

(12:38):
have me taking a tumble. Some of them might have
to get covered up a little bit, but still keep
the dog's face up there. Yeah. But these people, they said,
we're gonna send a digital frame.

Speaker 2 (12:48):
Fuck your animals, fuck your pictures that don't move. We're
sending to you the whole fucking yeah album.

Speaker 1 (12:53):
Fucked at dema sign. Dude, that's one of the coolest
gifts we ever got. It was cool. That's awesome. Yeah.
So on August sixteenth of nineteen seventy and seven, Elvis
Presley is pronounced dead at the age of forty two.

(13:14):
You had just forty two, We're almost there. He was
a rough ass looking forty two, though wonderful. He had
a lot of miles on him, old.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
Hole.

Speaker 2 (13:26):
I about to look up some melt his pictures from
nineteen seventy seven here.

Speaker 1 (13:29):
Yeah, before he got turn to a gigantis lard ass.
He was a really, really good I would say top
five more most gorgeous ammons ever. Yeah, he was like
back in the in the mid sixties. He was a
fucking beautiful man. Don't let your mem hear this episode.

(13:51):
Yeah he was. He was rough in the fucking in
seventy seven, he was dying. Yeah, he was sweaty at
the age of forty two, he was found unresponsive on
the bath term floor of Graceland. The cause officially a
heart attack, unofficially a cocktail of prescription drugs that made
his blood look like molasses maple syrup. Definitely not any

(14:14):
antibiotics in there, you know what I mean. But the
official story had some problems, lots and lots of problems.
Some of the questions we're going to try and answer
in this episode. Why did his body look wrong in
the casket? Why were there so many inconsistencies in the
odd topsy report, Why did the death certificate take weeks

(14:36):
to finalize, and why did people report seeing him alive
just days after he was reported to be found dead
on the bathroom floor taking a shit on himself. This
dud did so many drugs. And that's the thing, you know,
Back in like the sixties and seventies, those were primo drugs.

Speaker 2 (15:00):
Yeah, that was the fucking good.

Speaker 1 (15:01):
Ship, bro, those seventies and eighties, kailus, Back when coca
cola was made the right way and back when cokew
Would you like a light refreshing coca cola? Cocaine classic
and perhaps one of the most chilling aspects of all this.
Why does the gravestone at Graceland list his middle name

(15:22):
is Aaron with two a's when Elvis spelled his middle
name with only one a Aron, Aron, not Aron. Nope.
There's a lot of rabbit holes and conspiracies related to
the Elvis Presley death. You know you had. There was
some alleged mafia connections, there were some FBI files that
he was tied to, mistaken identities, plastic surgery, perhaps body doubles,

(15:48):
and even a masked singer who might have been the
King hiding in plain sight. Hmm. Interesting by the name
and little man by the name of Orion. We're gonna
go all the way down this rabbit hole. This is
is or is not the legend of how Elvis did
or did not not, did not die? And I'll tell

(16:10):
you that movie Elvis Presley that came out just a
couple of years ago, a few years ago. That's a
good movie, real fun movie, and it paints a pretty
good picture of what Elvis's life was like. We're starting
to grow out of those those generations that adored Elvis
so much. Those generations are honestly starting to leave us.

(16:33):
I remember one of one of my my friends that
I grew up with, who we make fun of often
on this show. Yeah, I went to his grandma's I
want to say. It was our sixtieth birthday party. And
this is when I was probably five six seven, and
we're all playing there in the house. I was, you know,
you eat finger foods, eating meatballs, and then there was

(16:53):
a ring at the there was a ring at the
front door, and then all of the ant like my
my friend's aunts he had three ants, No, he had
two aunts, and then his mom. They all look like
the little fucking gray haired crazy women. They're like, mom,
somebody's here to see you. And the door opened and
just fucking black chest muff hanging out, gold sunglasses, pinky rings.

(17:21):
Oh dude, he said, cringer's hair or any He said, however,
what a door? And within like fucking ten seconds, someone
had a boom box and they hit it. It's like
trner and this motherfucker started gyrating, and uh, they had

(17:44):
They had Nana. Her name was Everyone called her Nana.
She since died, but god, what a fucking sweet lady.
But they had Nana in a like a fucking dining
room chair right in the middle of the living room,
just like, I just like it happened to me my
bachelor party. You know, there's some fucking crackhead met outstrip
or came out whatever. Yeah, they had Nana right there
in the middle of the living room and just getting

(18:05):
Nana all frothy. Some guy named Al dressed up as dude.
It's so weird.

Speaker 2 (18:10):
Like we were at a street festival over the weekend
and there was a guy dressed as Elvis on roller skates.
He's called Sating Elvis. They got pictures taken with him.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
Like it was the fascination of people just dressing up
and acting as Elvis. Is I kind of want to
do it.

Speaker 2 (18:28):
It's kind of cool, but it's so fucking bizarre, Like
it's like of all people. I guess it's like he
has an easy like person to like imitate, you know
what I mean.

Speaker 1 (18:36):
If you go back and listen to his action, Like
his good songs. Yeah, dude, he had a really really
good voice. He was a really good performer. But that
night I will never forget that Nana was dude. She
was slipping and sliding down that seat. It was goosh,
it was making gushy noises. Oh god, Yeah, that boy
was he was on fire. He was hitting it, just

(18:59):
letting loose. Dude's singing into the broom and shit, that's awesome.
Didn't even give his dumb ass a real microcode, made
him sweep the floor after Yeah, claip Avernana, mop it up.
She squirtled. His fiance at the time that he died
was a young lady by the name of gender Ginger
ginger Alden. According to her twenty fourteen memoir Elvis and Ginger,

(19:24):
she discovered him quote this is by her, frozen in
a seated position on the bathroom floor, barely breathing, his
face blotchy with purple discoloration. Paramedics rushed him to the
Baptist Memorial Hospital and Men Tennessee, where he was pronounced
dead at three point thirty PM, and the entire world
whip dude, I mean, Elvis is uh. There's people in

(19:46):
my work right now. I will say this Indian people.
I go to lunch with my Indian friends sometimes and
they're like, what kind of music do you like? I'm
just like, I don't know whatever, you know, fucking hot
mullian what I tell him? And they're like, okay with
old us, Like Elvis, you're a thirty five year old
Indian fellow. And they all love Elvis. Dude, all those

(20:06):
Indian guys weird. They all love Elvis. It cracks me up.
The official cause of death, per the coroner's report, was
cardiac arrhythmia and irregular heartbeat. Those speculation about a drug
overdose swirled due to the kun's well documented struggles with
prescription medications. Yeah, yeah, it'll get you. He liked them

(20:27):
bad boys. They did. The autopsy, which is conducted by
doctors Eric Muirhead, Jerry Francisco and Noel Flaredo were was
kept partially sealed by the Presley family, with full details
locked away until twenty twenty seven. Oh wow, fifty years
after the death. So we're actually coming up on this.
We're getting there, man, two years Preliminary findings shared in

(20:51):
a press conference the next day confirmed a heart attack,
but found only prescription drugs in his system, prescribed by
his personal physician, doctor George doctor Nick Nicopolis. This is
much the same as that dude that was taking care
of Michael Jackson.

Speaker 2 (21:07):
Yeah, exactly when his ass couldn't.

Speaker 1 (21:09):
Sleep and they popp him plunking full of horse tranquilizers
and shit. Yep, and just make him sleep. If you've
ever been put under for a surgery, that's that's essentially
what these guys are doing every single night. Crazy. They're
getting put under for surgery every night just to sleep.

Speaker 2 (21:25):
Because you can't. Then after that, you fucking can't go
without it.

Speaker 1 (21:27):
You can't go with that, and you can't sleep, right,
You're so used to being put to sleep, crazy man.
Every night, about nine fifteen, my wife brings a fourteen
inch frying pan in the bedroom and she grazes it
across my skull and puts me to sleep. I don't
I don't need those cheap drugs. You don't know how
it happens. It's just it's something about it. Have you
ever been put under for surgery?

Speaker 3 (21:48):
Um?

Speaker 1 (21:50):
Have I? E uh, I not that I remember now.
Whenever I was younger with for my tubes, get your
tubes tied, and I have my tubes.

Speaker 2 (22:01):
Tied yet that didn't get you pregnant. Yeah he found
a way though. Yeah, I'm pretty sure they had to.
Whenever they either put my tubes in my fucking ears
or I think it is.

Speaker 1 (22:18):
Yeah, I don't remember it, like now I know your ears,
but all I can think about is you getting your
tubes tied?

Speaker 2 (22:25):
Don would have saved me so many problems later in life.

Speaker 1 (22:30):
You don't know how many ass beatings I take for
getting pregnant. Yeah. So, no illegal substances were detected, though
the toxicology report later revealed significant levels of barbituates, sedatives,
and depressants, fueling speculation the doctor Nick a little bit
of a liberal prescribing program for the for the King. Yeah,

(22:55):
his personal doctor, like we just talked about, doctor Nick
Nikopolis had prescribed Elvis over ten thousand pills.

Speaker 4 (23:03):
Jesus Christ in his final year of life. Fuck, that's instane.

Speaker 1 (23:14):
You think about it, It's not that much, dude.

Speaker 2 (23:17):
Boy, I'm fucking I'm thirty eight and I haven't taken
that many in my entire fucking life. And he took
this in one year. That's like a hundred times more
than the amount of pills I've fucking taken.

Speaker 1 (23:28):
That's twenty seven and a half pills a day only prescribed.
Holy shit, Yeah, a license doctor say, yeah, this shit's good.
Thirty pills a day. Fucking Fuck this guy. The King
is dead. Yeah, we know, dude, if you.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
Don't get rid of him, then who's Jesse Katzopolos gonna
act like on full House.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Yea, they got a Phillis prescription as fucking script look
like a white page's phone book and they drag it
in there.

Speaker 2 (23:57):
God, I can't imagine that that fucking what his fucking
my chart looked like.

Speaker 1 (24:04):
Dead dead old physician. I Oh my god. That dude
wasn't fucking anybody or anything. Like, there's no ways dick work.
His last year of his life. He was just a
fucking there's no ways dick works. As my father would say,

(24:27):
is useless as tits on a borehog. And I don't
know what that means, but right, oh, man, Elvis is
pretty Yeah, this doctor prescribeding ten thousand bills in his
final year. The idea that Elvis faked his own death
emerged almost immediately after his death in August sixteenth, nineteen
seventy seven. By the next day, a man resembling Elvis

(24:50):
was reportedly spotted at Memphis International Airport using the alias
John Burrows, a name that Elvis often used in traveling
incognito during his lifetime. This sighting set the stage for
decades and decades of speculation even to this day. The
grief of losing such a cultural icon, combined with Elvis
is larger than life persona. It kind of created a

(25:12):
breeding ground for conspiracy theories and different rabbit holes. To
this day, people still will just uh, we'll talk about
it later on. But just a few years ago, there
was like a video of a fucking gardener at Graceland.
There's like, that's Elvis just right back at King's cutting
grass on a Tuesday afternoon. There's a did you ever

(25:35):
see that video? I don't think so. There's a webcam
set up at Graceland where you can always look at Graceland. Okay,
that was the part. That's uh anyways, brother, this is Wonderwall.

Speaker 2 (25:46):
I heard the two notes first two notes there there.

Speaker 1 (25:49):
That was Joe house Rock, the unedited version. There's a
a webcam where it just films Graceland, I believe. And
then a gardener walks past and the gardener has a
striking resemblance to Elvis Presley. Yeah, which that's the perfect
place for a fucking you know, a phony to be

(26:09):
an imitator, if you will. Yeah, let me see if
I can find that picture. Elvis Presley gardener groundskeeper. Oh
there he is now Okay, I can see it. Who's
hold on on hunk? That looks like my dad? That
doesn't look like Elvis at all. That looks like a

(26:31):
pissed off groundskeeper. Yeah, he definitely has a groundskeeper look
to him. Yeah, his breath definitely stinks. So a lot
of these theories started to gain traction in the late
nineteen seventies and the nineteen eighties. Fuel there was all
kinds of books, media, TV shows. There was a mysterious
mass singer named O'Ryan by nineteen eighty seven, widely publicized

(26:55):
and later debunked, citing him Elvis at a fucking burger
king Kalamazoo, Michigan was setting the whirl ablaze. But we'll
go back a little bit. So the days after Elvis died,
they had a viewing for mister Presley. At the funeral itself,
tens of thousands of people passed by Elvis's casket at Graceland.

(27:19):
Many people that went to the funeral and laid eyes
on his deceased body, or not his deceased body. So
the man inside of the casket looked off. His face
appeared bloated and waxy, his hands were smooth and motionless.
Like they weren't like they weren't real, almost plastic looking.

(27:42):
He was. The body was sweating despite the casket being
air conditioned. Some believe, right a dead body was sweating.

Speaker 2 (27:51):
That's very strange. Yeah, they usually don't do that. I
think I would though, if I was, like if I died.

Speaker 1 (27:57):
That put some gelatt on my ass. You'd be from stinking.

Speaker 2 (28:00):
I sweat no matter what. It doesn't matter what it is,
it's I'm sweating.

Speaker 1 (28:04):
Well, your final pit stains in the casket, and you
just can't defend yourself, like all I'm overheated or it's
hot in here. What the thermostat at man. Some believe
the body was actually a wax dummy, hastily made by
a local funeral parlor. One mortician said, off the record,
quote that was the worst body prep I've ever seen.
If it was indeed even a body, oh shit. So

(28:28):
it was very, very suspicious to the people that believe
that he had not died, that he actually just checked out.
Even people in the industry are saying, yeah, that fucking
doesn't even look reality. Just the fact the hands look fake.
The whole thing is waxy. This thing was perspiring and sweating,
very strange now, when they moved the coffin, the coffin

(28:49):
weighed over nine hundred pounds, which is god damn boy,
more than one more than once in my life. I've
been invited to a funeral that a person I don't know,
and I get there and then people I do know
come up to me and they're like, Nick, can you
be a pall bearer? And I'm just like, you want

(29:10):
me carrying your dad aunt, who I've never talked to him.
I'm simply here to see that you're crying and tell
you I'm thinking about you. I do not know this lady. Yeah,
you don't want me carrying the casket. They're like, well
we got nobody, okay, whatever, Yeah, I'll do it. But

(29:30):
if I saddle up that motherfucker and it weighs nine
hundred pounds, boy, you best believe I am not picking
it up, and I'm gonna turn around and look at
you and say, I did not sign up for this shit?
What is inside of her ass? What did you you
fill this woman full of rocks? On the way out,

(29:51):
we got weights and fish, dude, I love that video.
I just watched that again the other day. We got
weights and fetch.

Speaker 2 (30:02):
These are so pissed they were. That's like gospel to
that man.

Speaker 1 (30:06):
Yeah, we got weight to be Trudy fucking cut her
belly opened. They're like, Nick, we need your help care
the casket. You're the only person we got. You got
a fucking refrigerator, Dollie, I can use. Those are the
kind of things that happened to me, though, you know,

(30:27):
it's very it's very normal. It's a normal setting for
you what happened to me. So the coffin weighed over
nine hundred pounds, which is far more than expected. Yeah,
the Presley family game to it was copper lined. The
conspiracy theories. Conspiracy theorists say it had something hidden inside.
Others think the weight was because the body inside it

(30:49):
was not a human corpse but a replica. I couldn't
imagine what nine hundred pounds of wax would actually look like.
Possibly even a casket cooling system to preserve the illusion
of whatever was inside of it.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
They got a fucking PSA four Elvis rated rated elvis
in that casket.

Speaker 1 (31:08):
Twenty three thousand BTU split unit. Dude, Yeah, why are
you stealing Catholic converters?

Speaker 2 (31:15):
You can just go fucking steal Elvis's coffin if it's
fucking copper, line.

Speaker 1 (31:18):
Of copper to put yourself into college in there, yeah exactly.
The most popular theory is that, well, Elvis, just like
you and I, sometimes we get tired of the fame.
Oh yeah, dude. He was exhausted by the pressure of fame.
He staged his death to live a quiet life out

(31:40):
of the spotlight, and by nineteen seventy seven, Elvis was
reportedly reclusive, struggling with health issues, and overwhelmed by constant
public scrutiny. Some people argue that he orchestrated an elaborate
hoax that just essentially disappear, possibly with the help of
his inner circle. There was some evidence that point towards

(32:02):
his disappearing. Some people say that there was a black
helicopter that was circling his property hours before his body
was found. Multiple witnesses report a black helicopter landing at Graceland,
and a lot of the conspiracy theorists theorize it whisked
Elvis away to new life, perhaps in Bermuda, uh farting

(32:22):
it where he could uh, where he could lay low.
That sounds like a nice place to vacation.

Speaker 2 (32:30):
Yeah, like a permanent vacation. Hell yeah, he's.

Speaker 1 (32:32):
Tired of all his hairy muff in America. Yeah, women
in Bermuda don't even have body hair. I don't think
they do. So.

Speaker 2 (32:40):
No, all these people that fucking did allegedly that fucking
ended up faking their own death. They made way more
money after they fucking died than even when they were alive.
So if they could somehow make sure that they got
their cut of that.

Speaker 1 (32:58):
What would a Tupac and Elvis man sound like? You
think it'd be good? Oh? Damn. I don't want to
try and sing. I don't like singing. Tupac's songs clore
to me in words in it, Yeah, and it scares
me to sing as music. I like listening to it,
though I was getting ready to go into it, let it.
I just don't. Man, we're not quite there yet. Hell Mary,

(33:21):
come with me. That's all I can say. How do
you listen to Tupac when I'm golfing? Though? Speak of
the Devil? If you do want to golf with us,
send us an email.

Speaker 2 (33:31):
Oh yeah, golf, golf.

Speaker 1 (33:33):
I think I'm gonna golf this weekend.

Speaker 2 (33:37):
Yeah, it'd be nice yeah, I may let me know when.

Speaker 1 (33:41):
Okay, I got a tea time for Tuesday, for Saturday
morning at Castle Hills for ten to four am. That's
not too bad, not too bad, beautiful course too Yeah.
The The Sun noted this was a key piece of
evidence for fans who believe Elvis escaped the limelight the

(34:01):
black helicopters. Then there's the case of the misspelled tombstone.
Skeptics point to Elvis's tombstone at Graceland, which reads Aaron
or Aaron with two a's instead of Aaron with one a,
his birth name. They argue this was deliberate, as Elvis,
superstitious about death, wouldn't allow his real name on a

(34:24):
fake grave. However, debunkers note that Elvis used both spellings interchangeably,
including Aaron on his divorce certificates.

Speaker 2 (34:34):
Motherfucker even he was on twenty seven fucking pills a day,
and no wonder you did know how to spelled a shit.

Speaker 1 (34:43):
He made his ass out of crayons, and he died
and put him in a casket, fucking just drip them
all over his body. He's like ten twenty thousand brown
crayons to make his ass. I can't imagine or for
his pictures. Uh see here Elvis, there will be in
two years. If not in casket, this is probably be

(35:06):
mostly porn. Dude. What is this? That's what I can't
be real. He tipped his hands over. There's no way
that's real. Oh, looks like a body pillow wires tits out.

(35:33):
That's gonna be a He's grabbing his bunch kids, Dude,
He's fucking grabbing his grundle. What is this? He's got
the hound dog by his by his neck. This is
gonna be this is like, uh, what are those tabloids
and stuff? It looks like he's got peanut butter all

(35:54):
over his chest cover honeys and the bears that eat
his ass. That can't be real. That's he's in the
pope's casket too. That's so bad. Oh fuck this. This
is the most renowned picture of Elvis in his casket,
which looks pretty doctored. Yeah, it looks very doctored. Looks

(36:18):
very fake. What's that other one that's real?

Speaker 2 (36:21):
What's the one three down on the left where it
looks like that tobacco commercial where the girls melted into
the chair.

Speaker 1 (36:30):
He's got a gold finger do there no fucking way.
That's disgusting. They just like, if you want to see
what we're laughing about, gona just go to Google and
type in Elvis, Presley and casket and there's a picture
of a really fat Elvis with honey and butter on
his chest. He looks like a KFC biscuit and they've

(36:51):
got him like propped up on his side. It looks
like you got a gunshot wound to the forehead. What
does this make this all make sense?

Speaker 2 (36:58):
The head looks like one of those fuck in the
pillow pals.

Speaker 1 (37:01):
You got a fat puss on it, dude, look at that,
got that fog. We'll put this on the Facebook and
the Yeah, god damn, dude, got a fat ass pussy.
Make that the cover of the fucking episode. Oh shit,
that's wild. There was another. God, Elvis is alive. Dude.

(37:25):
If I die and that's the way you dignify my asses,
you make me look like that, don't even bother telling
anybody I died at that point. Oh shit. A man
matching Elvis's description allegedly purchased a one way ticket to
Buenos Aires just hours after his death. The name on

(37:45):
the ticket John Burrows. This was the alias that Elvis
used for years while checking into hotels. The airline clerk
who sold the ticket later said he had on dark
sunglasses and peyd in cash quote, I knew it was him.
Reports say that no security footage was kept and no

(38:06):
follow up was made. If this was indeed the real Elvis,
he could have been on a plane to South Africa
before the world even heard that he was dead. There
have been thousands of alleged Elvis sightings since nineteen seventy
seven Rosetree stores in Las Vegas casinos. One famous sighting

(38:27):
in the late nineteen eighties claimed Elvis was spotted out
of Kalamazoo fucking burger, King fucking Tim Allen sold him cocaine.

Speaker 2 (38:36):
Dude, Elvis living in Vegas would be the perfect place for.

Speaker 1 (38:41):
Him to hide. I think it would be. It would
be the perfect place for him to hide. A super
busy city. Everybody there fucking dresses like him already in
a bubble waver. We're a trigger FROs.

Speaker 2 (38:54):
People just be like, Oh, that's fucking Elvis. You know,
that's fucking John Burrows.

Speaker 1 (38:57):
You know what I mean, That's our buddy John.

Speaker 3 (39:01):
All try like they're going in rings and tell the
French froz, Huh, I mean a lower kringsau onion ruings.
Them onion rings turned my asshole inside out, brother, the
onion rings from urging. Yea, how good are those? This
isn't add by Better Help. It's a big wide world, guys,
and that's scary out there. There's a complete information overload

(39:24):
and it can kind of be hard to decipher what's good,
what's not, what's helpful, and what's not helpful. One thing
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always thought I was too proud for something like that,
Like like that would never help me until I talked

(39:46):
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(40:07):
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(40:52):
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And that's where I got the help from our friends
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(41:12):
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Earn In is the app that has helped millions of Americans.
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(42:44):
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control of your pay. Yeah. Yeah, they're great with the
with the oniuring sauce. You gotta have the ing sauce.
You have their Onionuring Sauce pod. Yes, I have got
so good. We may have unlocked a secret menu for
some of you. But bird King serves the most delicious

(43:05):
onion rings ever. Oh man, and they've got these, uh,
They've got onion ring sauce. It's like a spicy thousand Island.
If you eat a large to king size onion ring
with the sauce. Technically, whatever comes out of your ass
could kill anybody you want to die. Anyone you want

(43:27):
to die, you kill them with the fart, you know. Yeah, man,
just you those onion rings I really enjoyed before they
shut all the fucking restaurants down around here, right Sonics.
Their onion rings were sweet. Yeah, they were really fucking
they were really battery. Oh they were good. Frishes had
good rings too. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (43:47):
Sometimes it would suck really fucking bad though. But that's
the problem about frishes is you never really.

Speaker 1 (43:51):
Knew what you're gonna dip it in the tartars haw.
Yes you do. Oh got love onion rings. We should
do a whole episode about onion rings. I'm with food
in general. Man Outback Steakhouse has a great bloomin onion. Yeah,
I love a blue and onion, man, a good bloom
That was the shittiest job in the kitchen.

Speaker 2 (44:08):
Yeah, bloomin onions, blooming those onions.

Speaker 1 (44:12):
I used to work at Lone Star Steakhouse as a
bus boy when I was sixteen. There was if you
weren't good enough to be a bus boy, then they
would make you make bloomin onions in the kitchen. Okay,
And every time I walk past the person making bloomin onions,
they would just look like they're on a one way path.
To just not being alive anymore, to suicide. Yeah, yeah,

(44:35):
and they're just it was usually illegal.

Speaker 2 (44:36):
What did they call them there, Texas?

Speaker 1 (44:41):
Oh, Texas blossom or something like that, or because I
know Chili's had awesome blossom. I think it was Chili's.
I don't think it was called a bloom and they
had the bloomin onion. All those all steakhouses have their
own fucking variation of it, onion straws. Oh fucking Balloon

(45:03):
Star steak else men, you they're still a lone Star
steakhouse in Guam for those of you wondering, Oh my god,
you their fucking websites shut down. Yeah, god, damn. I
don't know they were that hard off. We're still on
fucking Guam. Gotta be other rappetizers, right, they don't have

(45:25):
it on there? What the fuck they can't get onions there.
I don't know if the one in Guam is open anymore.
It may not be opened.

Speaker 2 (45:35):
It it's gotta they gotta fucking have that bitch on there.

Speaker 1 (45:39):
Oh sure that whatever. We're providing no substance to the episode.
So there were thousands of alleged Elvis sightings grocery stores
Las Vegas Casinos, Bird King, and Kalamazoo, Michigan, while others
swear he appeared as a background extra in the nineteen
ninety film Home Alone. In the scene where Kevin's mom

(46:05):
desperately begs for a plane ticket while John Candy stands
over her shoulder. There's another man over her left shoulder,
to the right of the screen that looks just like Elvis.
Aaron Presley, what do you think, eh.

Speaker 2 (46:21):
No, he looks just as much as like fucking Elvis
as he does Richard Caran fucking al Borland.

Speaker 1 (46:32):
That's who it is. I don't think so, Tim. There
was also in nineteen eighty nine fans they even formed
the Elvis Sighting Society to track these reports. There were
so many Elvis sightings over these well, Elliot there. One
of the most popular conspiracy theories claims Elvis went into

(46:52):
the wit sec or Witness Protection program after assisting the FBI.
He allegedly helped with a steam called Operation Fountain Pen,
which targeted a massive identity theft and fraud ring that
Elvis encountered through shady business managers. The FBI has released
seven hundred and sixty one pages of files on Elvis

(47:14):
dam among them a nineteen seventy letter that Elvis wrote
to President Nixon requesting to become quote a federal agent
at large acknowledgments emphasis on large only taking thirty pills
a day. Can't even those new wax arm acknowledgments that

(47:37):
Elvis met with the DEA agents and supplied information redacted
sections tied to organized crime cases. Elvis was recruited by
the FBI in nineteen seventy six to infiltrate a criminal
organization called the Fraternity, a group of racketeers scamming his father, Vernon,
over jet maintenance costs. After his cover was blown, Elvis

(48:00):
allegedly became a target and entered witness protection program. One
author cites FBI documents publicly available but inconclusive to support this.
The part of the debunking the FBI's operation Operation Fountain
Pen did involve fraud against Vernon Presley, his dad, but

(48:20):
there's no evidence that Elvis was an active agent. His
FBI status was purely honorary. The Nixon meeting was more
about Elvis's fascination with law enforcement than it was with
him performing any type of real spy work. Yeah, dude,
could you imagine Elvis being a nark. I can imagine it.

(48:42):
At the time. You know you're the mafia, organized crime.
Like Elvis wants to come over for dinner. You can't
turn that down. The King himself, he's bringing berg King
onion rings with him. We think he might have the
dipping sauce too. Bring him in. If there is anybody
that wants to record in my basement with us, and

(49:04):
you have bird King onion rings, we'll get you down
here absolutely. Then we move on to the O'Ryan portion
of the theories. In nineteen seventy nine, just two years
after Elvis' death, a masked singer named O'Ryan emerged. His
voice was uncannily similar to Elvis's. He wore a mask

(49:27):
on stage. His album covers featured him rising from a coffin.
There were songs in song titles included I'm Still Alive,
Reborn in Resurrection. He was signed to Sun Records, the
same label that discovered Elvis. It wasn't O'Ryan. Was that
a marketing gimmick? Perhaps a lot of people, mostly Flint fans,

(49:51):
believe it was Elvis himself, slowly returning under a disguise
of being a masked performer in a fucking blue jumpsuit.
Just why not? Orian retired mysteriously in the mid nineteen eighties,
right around the time Elvis sighting started to spike. And
this picture below here, it's not funny, Robert. We're doing

(50:13):
an investigation. How are we ever going to conduct a
real investigation of all you do is laugh at pictures
of old people? His posture? Whoever this bell is, Yes,
it is, dude. Look dude, We're gonna find a better

(50:34):
picture of him. You might not be able to tell
him this picture, but it is.

Speaker 2 (50:38):
Oh shit, that is Elvis.

Speaker 1 (50:43):
Fucking blue mass that's Elvis.

Speaker 2 (50:45):
Like it's like, it's not obvious who he's trying to
look like, find a blue masque.

Speaker 1 (50:52):
That's a Mexican. It's just a fucking Asian man. That's
fucking Don Pablo. That's a fucking restaurant here, Don Pablo.
His case that he is ship and fucking red, white
and green enchuladas. Oh give me your cushadilla. Fucking O'Ryan

(51:14):
where horror, horror.

Speaker 2 (51:18):
That's the that's the guy I was given Nana a
fucking lap dance or minal.

Speaker 1 (51:25):
This is his name is Jimmy Ellis actually as ship
and what could be related to him disgusting he is.
That's funny as fuck. A lot of people think that's Elvis.
What do you think? I don't know. I don't think
so for all your money, yes or no? No? Okay.

(51:46):
Another alternate alternative theory is Jesse Gayron Garan and the
twin switch theory. Elvis was born. This is proven fact.
Elvis was born a twin. His brother, Jesse was a stillborn, which,
for those of you that have never given birth, that
means one baby was dead and one baby was not.

(52:10):
But what if Jesse was not deceased like we've been told.
Some conspiracy theorists claim that Jesse was alive and hidden away,
possibly to protect him or train him in secret. Others
believe Elvis died young and Jesse took his place, living

(52:30):
the life of the king. Uh Still, others believe Jesse
was used in the fake death, possibly as a body
double in the coffin, so they dug his ass up.
They dug his stillborn ass up and blew him up
into a real life sized adult and put him in
the casket so his real brother could sail off to
Buenos Aires in a black helicopter that makes perfect sense.

(52:51):
DNA testing has been requested multiple times from hair samples
and family members, but all results have been inconclusive or
sealed very interesting. Are you looking up pictures of Jesse
Presley Robert because that's a stillborn baby and I don't
want that on my internet search history. Have you heard
of Bob Joyce, the guy used to America's Funniest Home videos,

(53:15):
Bob Sagett.

Speaker 2 (53:20):
Bob Joyce is another guy who's like very very like, well,
like a lot of people consider him to be the
real like to be Elvis Presley.

Speaker 1 (53:29):
Joyce or Joyce j O y Ce. Yeah, he's a
he's another. Yeah, he's the pastor.

Speaker 2 (53:36):
That everybody believes really is Elvis, and he could fucking
sing exactly like him.

Speaker 1 (53:47):
Maybe this is Bob Joyce or Elvis. Come on, Bob,

(54:15):
then his panties can't take it anymore. Thank it for
Jesus beautiful. Okay, well, you know those women in the

(54:47):
front row are just fanning their crotches. Dude, Oh, I
didn't want to get my Sundays dirty. Oh yeah, he's good,
he's good. Yeah. Yeah, there's a whole that's a big
old conspiracy. Theory that he's Honestly, I think he's Kenny Rogers.
He does. He looks more like Kenny Rodgers than but

(55:10):
he could be Elvis. Never know, sounds like him. Sure
it's fucking Kenny Rogers. Boy, he's a gambler, baby Kenny
Rogers making some fucking chickens. I don't know. He sounds

(55:33):
pretty good.

Speaker 2 (55:34):
He does sound good for a fucking.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
I want to be Elvis. You now. Building on the
mafia and the FBI angles here, Some believe Elvis entered
a formal witness production program after a the government. He
supposedly lived under a new identity, possibly at Graceland as
a groundskeeper. There's recent theories focus on a ponytailed, gray

(55:57):
haired groundsman at Graceland. Seeing YouTube videos, fans claim he
resembles an aged Elvis, though critics argue he's much too short. Okay,
which is the uh the picture I showed you earlier
of Elvis the groundkeeper?

Speaker 2 (56:15):
People do you know, get smaller as they get older,
So there's a chance that the posture, yeah, spine compression.

Speaker 1 (56:21):
Spine a biffida, yeah, scoliosis, yeah, A lot of different
ones should happened to the Holkster man, there is a
whole Someone sent us a whole, entire digital frame of
their dogs. It is the most distracting thing ever over
my shoulder.

Speaker 2 (56:38):
Yeah, every whenever we were warming up and you we
were we were setting the camera up, like adjusting it
because it was wrong. I kept seeing I kept seeing
it flash in the back, like the picture changing. It
was distracting me.

Speaker 1 (56:47):
Well, there's like a Wi Fi thing. We might just
put it out there and then everyone can send pictures
of their dogs on it. That would be cool. And
then just these these gay people or these lesbians that
send it, they have to share it with other dogs. Yeah,
there's someone in there just dropping to fucking picture their
asshole or something. No, I can't do it. Sorry. There's
also a believe a conspiracy that there are tunnels in

(57:09):
fact underneath of Graceland. Former bodyguards and employees have hinted
that Graceland has underground tunnels, including access to secret rooms,
panic shelters, and even private exit roots. Visitors have noted
strange architectural inconsistencies and buildings that appear connected from the

(57:30):
outside but aren't accessible. Some entrances have been photographed but
never officially acknowledged. The most common theory. There is a
tunnel from the mansion leading to an underground bunker beneath
the meditation garden. That is where Elvis is buried, or
allegedly buried. They waxed him up, buried him in a

(57:52):
nine hundred pound coffin with air conditioning, and then he
escaped through the tunnels to the trap door. Like David Blaine,
sleepy ass in a fucking block of ice, but him
been a block eyes and let him play Nintendo's sixty
four for three days. I fucking love David Blaine. Dude,
I'm gonna be burying myself in a bit of razor.

Speaker 2 (58:14):
There was like several years of my life that I
was so fucking obsessed and looked up to David Blaine.

Speaker 1 (58:20):
I loved him so much. I'm gonna be alive.

Speaker 2 (58:26):
Dude did so many crazy things, but not really but
not really.

Speaker 1 (58:31):
Yeah, I haven't eaten in three months. There's that one
where he just fucking stood on a pole for like
two weeks. Dude, what the fuck are you doing. I
haven't masturbated in two days. David Blaine, everybody, dudefere, we
can get him. Oh, he's got to be down hard.
We could probably get him on here for two hundred dollars. Yeah. Yeah.

(58:54):
If we can get Joe Exotic for fifty bucks, we
can get David Blaine for nothing.

Speaker 2 (58:58):
Someone's out of his face always looks like his putting
him to sleep.

Speaker 1 (59:02):
It's true, I remember what that was on, but I'm
listening to the Bryo podcast. There are even claims that
a few fans have witnessed people entering or exiting locked
garden doors late at night, or spotted light flickers from
beneath the stone paths there at Graceland. Insiders say the

(59:23):
tunnels were built during a security upgrade in the early
nineteen seventies after multiple break ins were reported. Whether they
were ever used as escape routes, that's not really known
to us. But if Elvis were to vanish undetected from
his own holm, he would probably likely use the tunnels
as the way to light his path to make sense
Buenos Aires or wherever he was trying to get sure.

(59:46):
In a two thousand and five Oprah interview, Priscilla Presley,
one of his wives, I think that was one. Yeah, yeah,
one of his ex wives allegedly said, quote, it's exactly
what he said the other day. And now that doesn't
sound like a very powerful statement of any kind. But

(01:00:07):
this is in two thousand and five, almost thirty years
after Elvis Presley died, So for her to say it's
exactly what he said the other day before correcting herself,
theorists say this is evidence that Elvis was still very
much alive. Similarly, his daughter Lisa Marie Presley, she was

(01:00:27):
very evasive in a response to Larry King in two
thousand and three about communication with her father that has
gone on to fuel speculation that he was in touch
with his loved ones but had in fact just moved
to a different part of the world and wasn't really dead.
She was very evasive about the questions. Let's see if

(01:00:51):
I can find that Lisa Presley, Larry WHOA, there's eight
videos there. She was married to Michael Jackson for the

(01:01:11):
while what she.

Speaker 2 (01:01:12):
Was, Yeah, isn't that fucking The thought of that is crazy?
Fucking the daughter of Elvis married to Michael Jackson. That's
so much power right there.

Speaker 1 (01:01:22):
She looks just like Elvis.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
She does, she does.

Speaker 1 (01:01:24):
She kind of would fucking lay her down.

Speaker 2 (01:01:26):
Yes, And like when she was like real popular, like
late nineties, she was a she was a good looking babe.

Speaker 1 (01:01:35):
Yeah, good looking lady. She's dead. She's speaking. Yeah, he's
on drugs. I mean, I don't know how she died.
All the good ones are I don't know. I could't
even remember, didn't remember she was dead. She's dead. Damn. Sorry, Robert.
I guess we're gonna get her on the show, Lisa.
We can, but we just got to do some stuff

(01:01:56):
fucking called. She's like easy baby, down check sound check
personal life. I always get a wiki and just look
for the thing that says death death. Yeah, there it is,
two thousand arrest. Yeah. Or Ticker gave out the odd

(01:02:16):
topsy stay that the opioids in her system did not
contribute to her death. She was high as fucked the
good for her. She was on thirty pills a day,
just like her dad. Man, just kidding, I've made that
part up. Damn. Only the King gets thirty pills a day.
The princess. You're around twenty, I.

Speaker 2 (01:02:36):
Mean, white castles. You think he'd be able to tackle.

Speaker 1 (01:02:38):
More than me? You think so. I remember my dad
was not an Elvis fan, and I asked my dad.
I said, when I was little, I was like dad,
how did Elvis die? And my dad said, Elvis died
from eating too many twinkies. And for the longest time,
people will be talking about Elvis, like, you know, he
died from eating too many twinkies, Like I didn't know that.
You had no idea, was just fucking with you. You know,

(01:03:00):
your dad says something that's gospel, it's the truth.

Speaker 2 (01:03:02):
Everybody also said he used to he died while he
was shitting on the toilet, and just a really, really aggressive,
like shrimp boil shit. I mean, if you've seen him
in later in life, it's not hard to believe that
he died taking a shit. That man looks like he
took some very girthy shits.

Speaker 1 (01:03:17):
I don't know why. When I was little, this is
the dumbest fucking thought that he's coming to my head.
When I was little, there were three movies that I
would watch on repeat, Tommy Boy, Happy Gilmore, Dumb and
Dumber and For and Billy Madison. Yeah, I rotated through this.
I knew, like the kids have been watching Happy Gilmore.

(01:03:37):
I know every single syllable in that movie. When I
would watch Dumb and Dumber and they would that dude
that followed them like chase them around. They put peppers
on his burger and kill him. That's how I like.
Every time I always see his face about to explode,
I would always think myself, that's what Elvis looked like
when he died. That's the dumbest fucking connection. You have

(01:03:59):
no idea how that can actionally came about. I don't know.
I was like, that's probably what Elvis looked like, and
he died, And every single time I saw that scene,
I think myself, that's how Elvis went out. Man, someone
over Pepperdisberger sucked his ulcer up. You know, see him
talking about with the double pills in his mouth, I
know exactly talking about. I would have never made that connection. No,

(01:04:20):
there is no connection there at all. Like, that's the
thing is, it's not a connection. It's just my ignorant brain.
I've got the IQ of a sweet potato. That's just
all that is.

Speaker 2 (01:04:30):
In between eating plato and yeah, watching that.

Speaker 1 (01:04:33):
You don't know how many times I look up from
my bowl and nails fingernails.

Speaker 2 (01:04:39):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:04:41):
Some fearists believe Elvis had extraterrestrial contact during his childhood.
He was born in Tupelo, Mississippi, which is an area
that has numerous UFO sightings over the years. In fact,
Elvis Presley reportedly told friends he saw a glowing blue
light hovering over his house as a child and believed
it followed him for many, many years. Okay. In the

(01:05:04):
book Is Elvis Alive? Almost All Off by Gail Brewer Giorgio,
a source claims Elvis had dreams of being lifted into
the stars. Others say the blue light was actually an
alien spacecraft, marking him as a chosen one, a human
hybrid designed to raise vibrations through music and charisma. Shit,

(01:05:26):
that's pretty cool. There's some other theories floating around to
tie Elvis to Project Sirpo, a government exchange program with
aliens the allegedly took place in the sixties and seventies. Robert,
We're still conducting investigations. This is not funny. Elvis, with
his ties to the military and obsession with badges, might

(01:05:47):
have been selected for off world travel and returned altered,
or never returned at all. According to one theory, Elvis
was a time traveler sent from the future, tasked with
softening the cultural transition from conservative post war America to
the chaos of counterculture movement. His image a rebellious but

(01:06:08):
non threatening Southern boy was the perfect psychological trojan horse
for them to achieve their agenda. Whatever that may have been, Okay,
The theory gets even weirder. In twenty twelve, a Reddit
user posted photos of a man in nineteen forties Germany
who looked exactly identical to Elvis. Some say this proves

(01:06:31):
Elvis was already jumping timelines before he was even fucking born.
Elvis was a Nazi. That's our next episode. Elvis was
a Nazi. Tune in for that one next week. Then
there's Project Bluebeam. Project Bluebeam is a conspiracy theory we've
talked about on this show, alleging that NASA in the
global elite plan to simulate the second coming of whatever

(01:06:55):
Messiah there is, whether it's Jesus or Satan, using advanced
hologram technology. You'll remember at Coachella about a decade ago,
they had holograms. They had Tupac on the fucking stage, dancing, rapping,
and none of us even could tell it wasn't Tubac.
It looked like a real Tupac. It was a decade
and a half, like a decade plus ago. It's pretty

(01:07:15):
crazy now Some believers argue that Elvis was chosen as
the prototype for this experiment. He had the appearance of
an angelic figure. He was worshiped by millions, His death
was theatrical and global. There's a there's a bizarre belief
that Elvis's voice and image are being digitally preserved for

(01:07:37):
some type of a mass religious deception, where a where
a future Elvis like Messiah will descend from the skies
in holographic form to control the masses. Thank you, ladies
and gentlemen. They're probably wonder why I'm here on now,
where's your me? Mol The truth about Elvis it'll never

(01:08:01):
be confirmed, much like JFK, much like nine to eleven,
Much like all these conspiracy theories that we've talked about
over the years. Yeah, I will say far and away
that the thought of covering the fake death of Elvis
Presley never crossed my mind until about two thirty today. Yeah,

(01:08:23):
and I started moving through all the research. I said, Jesus,
this is a fucking blast. This is a lot of fun.
There is a lot of theories connected to Elvis Presley.
I love Elvis, I love his music. I love listening
to Elvis in the car with Indian people.

Speaker 2 (01:08:41):
Hey, and you only gotta wait two more years for
the whole record to come, I know.

Speaker 1 (01:08:46):
And uh, maybe we can be the podcast the media
outlet where they say, Okay, we're gonna give these guys
since they did such a stellar job. Yeah, and they
were the ones that realized that Elvis was indeed a
holographic asia may alien. They are the ones that figured
it out, so that we're going to give them the autopsy.

(01:09:07):
That'd be great. So there, Well, the truth may never
be confirmed. Here are your options to believe in. Okay.
Number one, Elvis died of a drug induced heart failure
in nineteen seventy seven. Okay, you've already disproven that funnest theory.
Number two, Elvis faked his death to escape the mob,
aided by the Federal Bureau of Investigation.

Speaker 2 (01:09:27):
A little more fun.

Speaker 1 (01:09:28):
Number three, Elvis switched places with his twin. Eh.

Speaker 2 (01:09:31):
I don't like it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:33):
Elvis never exists as one person. Multiple men played Elvis
pretty cool. Elvis transcended his physical form and became a
cosmic being the best theory of them all. All all
of them are insane, All of them are completely plausibly impossible.
In nineteen ninety four, Graceland opened a new display in
its museum. A small handwritten note by Elvis, tucked into

(01:09:55):
a sealed display read, I will always be here in spirit,
love you, Oh think of for a mush. Some fans
believe it was code O. There's just another clue from
the grist Disappearing Act in American history. You're reading that
in the fucking the Landscapers sitting back behind you, like,

(01:10:15):
oh yeah, that was alone. Nope, come here a long
with this tunnel. So maybe he didn't die on the
fucking toilet in Memphis. Maybe he slipped away, turn the
volume down and let the world grieve while he watched
for a distance. Because we, as morbid as it may be,
we all want to attend to our own funeral to

(01:10:36):
see if our mom is really upset that we've died.
We want to know who the motherfucker is that walks
up and grabs our wife around the waist and says,
it's gonna be okay, baby. I'll make sure you got
everything you need. I'll punch you in your dick so hard,
I'll haunt you so hard. Oh fuck, dude, I will
make sure you get a rectile dysfunction. I dare somebody

(01:11:00):
to grab my wife's tits at my funeral. Halkom. I
thought my wife was at work today, Like the entire day,
I was operating like my wife was at work. And
I'm still kind of on eggshells about my house getting
broken into, so I'm always watching my uh my cameras
and shit, uh huh. And my front door camera went

(01:11:21):
off and all I saw was tits, like giganticus fucking tits.
That's the type of burglar I want. I was thinking myself,
God damn, come on in, baby. So I hurried up
and I clicked on the picture and it was my
wife and the sun dress fucking around with the mailbox.

Speaker 2 (01:11:42):
I don't, yeah, dude, text her what I text her?

Speaker 1 (01:11:45):
Text her? I said, God damn, girl, what would I say.
I'm gonna go back to read this one. I'm going
to kill all of them, I said. All I could
see was this little thumbnail. But I was like, man,
there's someone in my front door with really big boobies.

(01:12:07):
You know what she said back to me? What she
said that was me, And I'll shove my big boobies
in your face later if you promised to leave marks. Hell, yeah, dude,
I'm gonna beat it up. God. I can't wait to
just be fighting for my life. Fucking bite on. I

(01:12:28):
went to sleep at eight thirty five last night, So dude,
I'm ripe for the pick in this evening. Fucking bodies
just yearning. Some people like. Some people say, oh, I
feel like I was shot out of cannon. I feel
like I was shot out of a fucking laser. Dude,
I feel great. So maybe Elvis didn't die on the

(01:12:48):
toilet in Memphis. Maybe his housekeeper had big boobs and
she hung around the front door. Maybe he slipped away,
turned the volume down. He's just letting the world grieve,
because if anyone could fake his death, live in secret
and still be the king, it is indeed Elvis. And
maybe he hasn't left the building at all. He's just
hiding in plain sight. Hold his little Hounko Hunky Bernie

(01:13:11):
in the Law of War. Thank you. I like Elvis.

Speaker 2 (01:13:17):
I think he's fun at of did drugs with him
back in the sixties, for.

Speaker 1 (01:13:20):
Sure, like the child molestation aspect of Elvis. Okay, but
that was a different time. Sure, kissing all the little girls. No,
he had a wife that was like, oh yeah, ten. Yeah,
I want to look up. Yeah, I feel like that's
a that's definitely a that time thing life.

Speaker 4 (01:13:44):
Was.

Speaker 1 (01:13:47):
Okay, they met when Priscilla was fourteen and Elvis was
twenty four. I don't like that one. Oh god, that's nasty.
That's rough. Elvis, you dirty dick bastard. I'm glad you're dead.

Speaker 2 (01:13:59):
He was a fucking groom. Go figure was grooming.

Speaker 1 (01:14:04):
That's so weird.

Speaker 2 (01:14:05):
That's ten years, man, which ten years really isn't that much,
but when it's twenty four and.

Speaker 1 (01:14:09):
Fourteen, thirty two and forty two, ye or whatever, there's
a ooh. So I'm a bit of a There's a
couple of things I want to talk about before we go,
so stick around. The episode's done, all the Elvis content
is done. Okay, but there is something very very important
I would like to talk about. Okay, you recently acquired

(01:14:32):
a cat. Yeah, and you and I haven't talked about it,
Harley at all. Yeah, your wife has sent me some
snaps here and there. This cat that you've acquired, right,
and in like my whole entire life, I've wanted you
to have an animal, and you've never had an animal,
and now you finally have an animal. What's the cat's name.

Speaker 2 (01:14:54):
Dolly, like Dolly Parton the old fucking Fat knockers On. Yeah,
she's she's a red orange cat.

Speaker 1 (01:15:03):
Tell me how you acquired this cat. She's pretty fucking
chill man. So it was a There was a storm
one weekend. It was just maybe like a month ago.
It was a Saturday.

Speaker 2 (01:15:13):
We got home from somewhere and it was raining really bad,
and we ran from my car to my side door,
and as we were running, a cat ran out of
the bush and followed us, and it followed us to
get out of the rain because it was fucking soaked,
and it hit underneath our awning, like our the lip

(01:15:33):
of our roof for a minute, and it's like a side.

Speaker 1 (01:15:39):
Our side area. But and we were in it. It
ran right into the house with a shooting. We do
at that point, we didn't know if it was a
boy or girl. Cat ran right in. We let it
in to get it out of the rain, and we
were like, okay, well, let's get this fucking cat out
of the house because this thing has rabies or whatever.

(01:16:00):
We got a box for it, we put it.

Speaker 2 (01:16:02):
We put it out on the front porch and she
stayed there the rest of the day. We were like, well, fuck,
this cat's.

Speaker 1 (01:16:08):
Not going away. We need to go get some food.
So we went out and bought some food. You said, well, like,
well fuck this cat, like not literally fuck it, okay,
but fuck well okay, sorry, you know I'm slow this stuff.

Speaker 2 (01:16:18):
So yeah, and she stayed there for like three days, okay,
didn't leave our front porch. So we kept feeding her,
and then finally we were like, well, let's let her
back in for a second.

Speaker 1 (01:16:28):
I think is maybe the second day. It really wasn't
really three days, but she was ate up of fleas,
so we're like, god, damn it. So we had to
take her in, gave her a couple of dawn dish
soap baths to kill them.

Speaker 2 (01:16:38):
And then how she handled the bath perfectly fine. So
she was in there for a while because she was
had so many fleas, and we were you know, I
fucking put the ring of soap around her neck first
so that they wouldn't go past it, and was fucking
taking care of her, washing up her body and everything.

Speaker 1 (01:16:53):
And trying to get them all off. And we got
a little flea comb.

Speaker 2 (01:16:56):
They tried to get the rest of them off and
we're just you know, taking care of all that ship
and you guys, yeah, yeah, I mean she so we
got rid of the fleas and then she ended up
getting sick. So she had like a really bad u
ur I like a upper respiratory infection.

Speaker 1 (01:17:11):
You guys did fuck the cat up. We did fuck
the cat. And she she's super snotty and boogery, but
she was, you know, super loving.

Speaker 2 (01:17:28):
She was chilling out. She's getting better. She's better now
for the most part. She still has a little sneeze,
but I mean she's she's going in between outside inside.
She took a ship on her floor a couple of times.

Speaker 1 (01:17:40):
My cat won't stop shitting on the floor. I think
she's about to die. And we talked about that briefly.

Speaker 2 (01:17:43):
So yeah, I gotta get her if she's in the
house to you know, get acquired using a litter box,
which I have no fucking idea how to do that.

Speaker 1 (01:17:49):
So later, do you have a box in there yet?

Speaker 3 (01:17:51):
We do.

Speaker 1 (01:17:52):
Yeah. You just take her up to it and you
throw her in it, and I'm like, you look at
her like, this is where you shit now, this is
supery poop. You shit in his mod. Yeah, it's just
funny to me that the cats just know they will
too if his dogs are dumb as fuck when it
comes to training, Like dogs will shit in a litter
box by accident. Yeah, but they'll also shit on your
dirty clothes. They'll shit on the wall. I've seen dog

(01:18:14):
shit on doors. Yeah. I think I had dog shit
in our sink one time.

Speaker 2 (01:18:20):
Yeah, but she's she's pretty fucking chill. But I think
it's all.

Speaker 1 (01:18:24):
It's all due to the fact that she's pretty much
been sick since we had her. Yeah, but we got
a fucking I don't know, we don't have any fucking
extra money to get her fixed and all that shit,
But we need to get her ass fixed, and she's
gonna be inside and outside. Well, I will say there's
a place just north of here called his Hand Sanctuary,
and they do spay and neutering for next to nothing. Really,
it's literally like twenty or forty dollars or something. That's

(01:18:46):
not a whole lot of money. Yeah, and that's where
I've had all my cat's spade, you know it is
what It is, a cheap place to get him spade. Yeah,
and they do it same day pick up. And I
think even if you don't have money. You can tell
the man I'm taking care of his cat, and they'll they'll, they'll,
they'll work with you whatever whatever that looks like, you know.
I mean, I'd like to get her her her vaccinations
and ship and give her some my vermict.

Speaker 2 (01:19:07):
And get her a COVID vaccine, get her the Johnson
Johnson booster.

Speaker 1 (01:19:12):
She she liked me inside with you guys though. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:19:15):
Yeah, but she'll go right the fuck outside too. And she's,
like I said, she doesn't really, you know, she's pretty
fucking chill.

Speaker 1 (01:19:22):
He comes and goes. I think she's still sick.

Speaker 2 (01:19:24):
So like she has like a she mews, but it's
a silent meal, like nothing comes out.

Speaker 1 (01:19:30):
Get her some anti biotics. I know. We gotta get
her taken care of. That's a yeah, it's that's expensive, expensive,
Yeah it is. It's like, great, there's an expense that
we didn't fucking didn't you know, calculate for well, nothing
unless you guys are feeding, you're and taking good care
of her.

Speaker 2 (01:19:47):
We're taking care of her and she's I guess we
got a fucking pet now.

Speaker 1 (01:19:51):
So that's cool, that's really nice.

Speaker 2 (01:19:53):
And if all people, my wife is the one that's
attached to her.

Speaker 1 (01:19:55):
Really. Yeah, she's not a cat person either, not at all.

Speaker 2 (01:19:58):
She Yeah, though he is. Now's funny man.

Speaker 1 (01:20:02):
Yep. So the other thing I needed to talk about.
There is a couple that moved in around the corner
and the wife looks like a movie star. Really from
a distance, she looks like from a distance from the road,
she looks like one of those humans that are so
attractive that you don't want to be around him because
it makes you uncomfortable. Okay, So naturally, I started doing

(01:20:23):
my homework and I couldn't find anything about these people
on Facebook. But then I finally found he's like one
of them, Like, he's a younger dude. Just looks like
one of those dudes that like young tatted up with
a whole bunch of money. Okay, I see him out
there doing stuff. They've got toys and super clean set up,
super well manicured ship. I'm like, dude, He's just a

(01:20:46):
tattooed dude with some good looking piss. That's all it is. Yeah.
But then I found their Facebook as a shared Facebook page.
I'm like, okay, they cheat on each other naturally, and
I clear I went to their Facebook and I saw
pictures of her. She's like like an overcooked speedway hot dog.

(01:21:07):
Just she looks like she's probably twenty five to thirty
years older than him, okay, very plastically okay, And there
was like all kinds of posts on there like we
love each other, the age doesn't matter, so shit. Hell yeah,
that's exactly what it looks like. Yeah, one of those nice,
very dysfunctional relationship. And I just love watching it all due.

(01:21:29):
I love that. I love just like fine dirt about people. Yeah,
and uh it's fun. I drove by the other day
and they're just they're out front, and I wanted to
be like, I want to stop me, like offeny, nice
to you let your mom live with you, but I
didn't you take a care of your mom. Be good
care of your mom with an big, old, fucking fake

(01:21:50):
ass hits.

Speaker 2 (01:21:51):
Hell, yeah, that's cool as fuck. Good for them, man,
good for him, you out.

Speaker 1 (01:21:56):
There weed eating for your mom, you fucking gay bitch.
I like upsetting people too, so it's yeah, it works
perfect passively upsetting people, right, And you know that's probably
like a sore fu sore subject. You bring something up
about that and they're like, oh, your motherfucker. Yeah, but
that pussy smells like def Leopard. Does your mom like

(01:22:18):
Elvis fucking take her painties off and plays Motley Crue?
Hell yeah, that's fun. We used to an episode on Elvis.
Your mom will probably really like it. Ever listened. Oh
this isn't dead, bro, He's an alien. It's graphic alien.
Oh fucking hell yeah, dude. All right, well we're done

(01:22:39):
seven fifty three pm Eastern Standard time. We'll get this
uploaded for you. Guys. Thank you so much. The King
isn't dead and neither are we. So buy tickets to
our live show in Dallas, Texas. Brohyo podcast dot com
slash tickets. Also, we had a really really successful episode
last week where people submitted anonymous confessions. You can now

(01:23:00):
go to brohio podcast dot com slash confession confessions Sorry,
brohio podcast dot com slash confessions, and there's an anonymous
link where you can share your confessions, your anonymous confessions

(01:23:21):
that we're gonna read them on the show. There are
so many more that have came in. That wild, wild,
wild wild love that love that keep your eyes peel
on the social media's for the Elvis Honey. The Elvis,
the Dead Elvis with the honey on his chest. We'll
be sharing that nonetheless. Everyone have a great week. Yep,
thank you guys. Hie guys, love you. I want to

(01:23:57):
see U.