The Elijah Winfrey Show

This week Elijah talks a little bit about his medical proceedure, honors the amazing teachers at Sunset Elementary as part of Women's History Month, answers your email questions & more! Be sure to tune in

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome to the Elijah Winfrey Show. Each week, Elijah gets
you caught up on his work in the community, talks
with guests about issues and causes that are important to them,
while also answering your email questions. So sit back, relax,
and enjoy the show. Here's your host, Elijah Winfrey.

Speaker 2 (00:26):
Hello, folks, and welcome to the Elijah Winfrey Show. I'm
indeed your host, Elijah Winfrey. We have a terrific show
lined up for you today, folks. Great questions have been
sent in from you the listeners that I am always
excited to answer. Shout out to my amazing producer, Greg Nice,

(00:48):
who puts this show in positions to succeed. He gets
it out to the masses, and I am grateful for that.
I have a lot to get to today, so I'm
going to try to get it all in as best
as I can. So if I miss anything today, please
bear with me. We'll get it up and on the

(01:10):
show next week. I first off, I hope that your
weekend as it winds down, has gone really well. I
hope that you accomplished some things. I hope that you
are able to carve out some time for self care.
I think that's very important something that we all need
to get better at, especially me. But I hope that

(01:37):
you are taking time for yourself. It is very important
to do that. My past week was I always said
it was business as usual, and it kind of was.
I had a procedure done colonoscopy as a matter of fact,

(02:01):
and it was long overdue in my opinion, and it's
something that I have been putting off for a while.
But I began experiencing some discomfort probably in January, and

(02:26):
without going into any you know, I don't want to
go into like, you know, a big deal or great
detail about it. A couple of weeks ago I took
a Monday off to go in and and and kind
of find out what was happening. And it was a

(02:50):
blessing that I did that because there were some things
inside of me that I needed to deal with that
I have been putting it off selfishly. And you know,
I know we all think that sometimes we are superhuman
and we can push through most things. I'm here to

(03:15):
tell you that you know, at some point you need
to slow down and stop and really take care of yourself. Luckily,
for me, through the colonoscophy, we were able to remove
some things that were causing me a bit of discomfort.

(03:39):
All the tests came back. I got the last test
this Friday evening or last Friday evening, and everything was good.
Now it's all about the healing process and the journey
from that, which I am excited about. Feels like I'm
getting stronger every day. I still can't work out the

(04:01):
way I would want to, but I'm able to kind
of stretch a little bit more and I think hopefully
next week I can get back into a little lightlifting.
But I say all that to say, we got to
take care of ourselves. We want to help others. You know,

(04:27):
we want to be we want to be sometimes larger
than life. Not everybody. I'm not saying I want to
be larger than life, but you know, we want to
do what we can to help our community. But if
you're not taking care of yourself, you know, then you
fall short of that goal. And going to the doctor

(04:48):
has never been It's never been a chore for me.
From being honest, you know, growing up, we didn't really
do that. It was home remedies, and you know, you
relied on God to kind of take care of you,
and whatever happened to you. It happened, you know, And

(05:09):
so as I got older, I just never wanted to
go to the doctor. I would always say, let the
illness of whatever it is run its course and I'll
be finding a couple of days. You know. I now
know that that is not the way I think. I've
always known that, but the male egos sometimes it's it's something,

(05:33):
it is something. But I think having this colonoscopy was
a game changer. It was one of the best decisions
I've ever made in my entire life. And as a
black man, I know how hard this impacts our community.

(05:58):
Colon cancer, prostate cancer, it's big in the black community.
So black men especially because we are we're always the
ones on the edge of the bed complaining and moaning
and groaning about you know, stomach pains or leg pains

(06:18):
or back pains, and and and when we're told we
should go get checked out, we always say, nah, we'll
push through. I'm telling you right now, don't push through.
Go see a doctor. It can save your life. I
learned a lot leading up to that process, and I'm

(06:40):
learning a lot right now. So I'm not I'm not
talking at you black men. I'm talking to you as
a brother, Go get checked. Don't wait until it's too late,

(07:02):
like I almost did. I wanted to lead the show
with that because it's been on my mind, you know,
whether or not I wanted to share, you know, share
this with folks, but I felt like the more I

(07:22):
thought about it, I would be doing a disservice if
I didn't at least talk about it and create something
that I can put out on on my social media
pages to help those who are on the fence get

(07:43):
off the fence and go get checked. It's very important.
You want to be around for your family, your friends,
and for yourself. There's so much in this world that
I still want to do from amunity aspect, from family aspect,

(08:04):
and I really enjoy watching people win and be successful.
So without getting too emotional right now, I'm going to
be here for a long time, and having lost friends
to cancer, I know how I know how how tough

(08:32):
it can be. So get checked. Get your screening today.
It's nothing to be ashamed of. You're you're asleep, and
and and before you know what, you're awake and and
you're able to kind of start the process of healing.
So get it done, Get it done. Today. All right,

(08:57):
uh as for the rest to my week or past week,
as we you know, transition a little bit here. I
I don't know. I'm sure some of you've seen it.
I made a post on my social media pages. You know,
as we celebrate Women's History Month, we we talk about

(09:19):
and celebrate those who've come before us that have open
doors and paved the way for for women. H and
those of us, and and and those that are present.
Right from my adult childhood, I was raised by women
right single mom. There are a lot of women in

(09:41):
the neighborhood who who helped raise me as well. But
I wanted to take this moment too to recognize and
acknowledge the teachers at Sunset Elementary. I am a para
educator at Sunset Elementary and and I can't begin to
tell you firsthand how impressive the teachers and staff are

(10:08):
at putting kids in positions to succeed. Those teachers are superheroes.
They sacrifice so much of their time away from spouses, boyfriends, girlfriends,
families to prep lessons for these students to be successful.

(10:35):
And since I've been there it's been three years now,
I've tried my very best to acknowledge them in some
type of way or fashion, whether it's saying something positive
or buying flowers for you know, the teachers, or sending
them a positive email. You know, I've tried my best

(10:57):
to make sure that they know that I see them
and I hear them. And today again I just want
to acknowledge and say thank you for your sacrifice, thank
you for your service, thank you for your courage, thank
you for your perseverance, thank you for your responsibility and

(11:23):
helping these kids learn and transition to the next grade
and the next grade and the next grade. And you're
getting them ready for life. You're teaching them the core
values and the life skills, you're giving them the fundamentals.
So I acknowledge you today and always. I also want

(11:52):
to share with you all about a recent collaboration that
is taking place. You know, Team Winfrey, my nonprofit organization,
is hosting a donation drive for Dignity for Divas, and

(12:12):
I think it was a few shows ago. I told
you that I was working hard on trying to collaborate
more with women in the community that are doing great things.
You know, we spend a lot of time talking about
the men and and their organizations and what they're doing

(12:34):
and and and and I'm not knocking that. I think
it's great. But you know, we don't spend enough time
talking about, you know, the powerful women in the community
and around the world who are also building great organizations
and nonprofits and schools, and and we don't talk about

(12:55):
their leadership enough. So I've been on the hunt to
collaborate with more women this year pertaining to my nonprofit.
And I had a great conversation with the founder of
Dignity for Divas, Nikki Is. She's an amazing leader. You know,

(13:19):
I encourage you all to visit Dignity for Divas dot
org and check them out. Their approach for women experiencing homelessness.
Getting housed. We know isn't an easy journey. It's the beginning, right,
It's the first step on the path of restoring dignity

(13:43):
and self sufficiency. And you know, they're about transitioning, transitioning
these women out of homelessness, and they do a great job.
So if you if you if you're on if you
check my social media pages at ELI six on Instagram,
you can follow Team Winfree on Facebook. You can go

(14:07):
to Teamwinfree dot org and check out our website. We
have not only you know, you know the drive that
we're doing, but we also have the list of supplies
that's needed toilet paper, dish washing, soul laundry. So everything
has to be new, you know, nothing used. It doesn't

(14:27):
have to be you know, top of the line. You
know they're not looking for that, just something to get
them started. So any support would be greatly appreciated. Again,
that's Dignity fordivas dot org. I encourage you to please
check them out and if you want to get involved,
just contact Nikki via email on their website. I'm sure, uh,

(14:50):
there is something for all of us to do to
help in this process of these amazing women transitioning. But again,
you know, it's it's all about service and what you
can do for others. I'm grateful that I am able
to reach out, get a response and then put something

(15:19):
in place to make something happen. So dignityfodivas dot org,
please check them out all right, before we get into
some of these questions, folks, the rest of my past
week was good. I did get two days in at
the school, very very sore, uh those two days, but

(15:43):
we got through it today. Again, I think I'm getting
stronger every day, so you know, I'm getting I'm feeling
better and better about where things are currently going and
how they're processing. Family's doing really well. You know, we're busy,
We're busy as always. I think we're gonna get a
little bit of downtime though, you know, as we hit

(16:04):
April and then after a little break, you know, I
really kicked things off. So all this progressing well. My
kiddo finished basketball season his basketball season, and he did
really well. They finished with a five hundred record, a
winning record, which is great. But to me, the biggest

(16:26):
thing that I took from his experience playing organized basketball
for the first time was his mental state when they lost,
not just when they won. When they won, he was humble.
He didn't really jump up and down when they lost.
He was frustrated, but he was able to transition really quickly,

(16:51):
and to me as a parent, that's everything. Now. You know,
I know that there will be times when that doesn't happen,
but to see it on the court firsthand with my
own eyes, to watch him kind of transition and grow mentally,

(17:18):
it was a big deal for me. It really was,
because that was one of my biggest issues I was
having was when they lose, when it's not going his way,
how's he going to respond right? How does he push through?

(17:38):
And he pushed through and I'm happy for it. So
he's getting ready. He's starting to transition already for track,
which he's excited about and so are we. But I
think the little break right now will will give him
time to kind of build his body back up and
be ready to play. One of the things that he

(18:00):
didn't do really well that both Mom and I got
on him about was hydrating and eating. He doesn't. He
has a hard time, like you know, not eating when
he should be eating, and in some games you could
tell right away he was exhausted, you know. But I

(18:24):
think he'll be better next time. I think he learned
a lesson in that department. So all is well from
a family standpoint. Now, let's get into some of these
questions today. Each week I encourage you to send questions
into me at Elijah dot Winfrey at gmail dot com,
and they go to my producer and he then picks

(18:46):
out questions and gets them ready for the show. And
your questions never disappointed. So this first question is from
Mariah and Daytona Beach, Florida. Mariah writes, Eli, my question
today for you is this, what does making peace with
the mirror mean? And why is it so personal for you?

(19:11):
Marih That's a good question. I posted a video. I've
given a speech to some adults that I mentor men
and women, and I've been mentoring them for a while
now about just life and making sure that you've made

(19:34):
peace with yourself. Right, no matter how big or how
small those breakthroughs are, are you having those conversations with
with yourself? And you know on it means a lot
to me on a personal level because I've gone through
that journey where you do all these things in the community.

(19:56):
You know you're not you're not looking for anything in return, right,
So it's not but you still don't understand why you
feel the way you feel. Right, I was still feeling
down depressed, you know, in those moments, I was happy,
but I had to I had to come to the

(20:19):
realization that I wasn't making peace with myself. Right. You
can do all this work in the community, right, you
can give back and donate time and money and all
this stuff, and it's great, but if you're not making
peace with the mirror with yourself. Then it gets harder
and harder for you to process, you know, the things

(20:41):
that you're doing and whether or not it makes sense.
So it's personal for me because I had to deal
with that. You know, sometimes we wake up in the
morning and we brush your teeth in the mirror and
watch the face, and you know, we don't really we

(21:03):
don't really pay attention to the reflection staring back, right,
So I had to start having talks with myself. And
sometimes their their loud talks, and you know, Lista'll come
in and be like, who are you talking to? And
I'm like, I'm talking to me. But it's important that

(21:23):
you you make those breakthroughs. You know, what, what what
are you? What am I proud of today? What's my
goal today with myself? Right before I can jump out
and help anybody else, what am I working on today
to be a better person? And when I can, when
I can have those little breakthroughs, right, some days they're
very little I'm able to help, you know, out in

(21:45):
the community or in the school. Some days they're big
breakthroughs and I can do a little bit more. Right,
But if I'm going to ignore the reflection, then it
makes me hard. It makes it hard for me to
do my community work and do the things that bring
me joy because I'm not having any breakthroughs on myself.

(22:06):
We should be having these breakthroughs every single day, every day.
Some days aren't going to be big, all right, some
days are going to be very small, very tiny, but
their breakthroughs. And you know, that's what it That's what

(22:27):
it means to me, Mariah, just to make sure you're
good with yourself. We all struggle with a lot of things.
We all carry a lot of weight. A lot of
it's from the past, a lot of it's from the present.
You know. What we have to do is take a

(22:50):
little bit of that weight off at a time. And
sometimes I compare it to like, you know, you ever
broken a glass on the floor and it kind of
shatters and you got to clean it up, and you're
cleaning it up piece by p Well you're kind of
getting it all together and you're cleaning up piece by piece,
or you know, block by block. That's kind of how

(23:10):
I see things, right. You eventually get it cleaned up,
you know, but it's a process. That's a great question.
Next question is from Demi and Nebraska Demi rights. How
do you stay motivated when things get tough? I think

(23:31):
I stay motivated because I remember. I remember where I started, right,
I know how my journey began. I know where I
came from. I know how tough it was then to
get to this point now. And things are supposed to
be hard and challenging, and some days I don't have

(23:53):
the answer. Some days I don't get it, but it'll
never be because I didn't try. So so, you know,
I remind myself of the big picture, right, I know

(24:14):
what it's like at the end, you know, So I
tried to as I get As it gets tougher for
me in the journey, I just remind myself you know
how it all started for me as a kid and
my mom. And that's how I stay motivated, you know.

(24:38):
I know, I know that I work extremely hard, and
I know how tough it is to be beaten down
and told negative things, you know, But I think of
I think of my fight and how hard my mom

(25:05):
worked to put me in a position to succeed. So
that keeps me motivated. I hope that helps. It's a
great question. Next question is from Sabrina and Alaska. Sabrina writes,
is that wait, hold on, is that our first question
from Alaska? Wow? Sabrina writes, what what's a piece of

(25:28):
advice you would give your younger self? Oh my gosh,
I get this question all the time, and Sabrina, I'm
not frustrated. Let me just say that, I just I
don't know. I'm so uncomfortable with this question because I

(25:57):
don't there are a lot of things probably would tell
my younger self. But if I did that, what I
be in the situation i'm in now? Right? What I
be where I am now? What I be better off?
As a As a kid, I always knew right from wrong.

(26:19):
I always knew what I wanted to be right. I
always listened to, like, uh, the tough stories of somebody
struggling to make it and then they make it, then
they break through with some that do not make it,
and the mistakes that they made. I just feel like

(26:41):
this question in particular, it's tough for me because I've
seen athletes talk about this and they I've seen videos
where they, you know, they create these ai things where
you're you're the older version of yourself is talking to
the younger version about this and that, And look, I'm not.
I'm not gonna knock that. I think it's great if

(27:02):
it worked for you. I think for me, my question
about this question would be if I if I did that,
would I be in this situation? What I be in
in Seattle? What I be what I be in Germany?
Would I be in Georgia? Still like, I don't know

(27:23):
how to really assess this question, and believe me, I'm
working on it. I do think about it, but I
just don't know if I have a right answer. You know,
this is the one question that I think my producer
puts in here because he wants to press me for

(27:46):
an answer, and I just don't. I don't have it
right now. I'm sure I will, but I just kind
of feel like I don't. I don't know if that
would serve me well, I just don't. Next question is
from Helen in Virginia. Helen writes, Elijah, if you could

(28:10):
send a message to everyone in the world for thirty seconds,
what would you say? Gosh, Helen, great name, by the way,
for thirty seconds? But what I say? I would say,
learn to lose your fear of failure, take the risks.

(28:38):
You gotta get it wrong to get it right. If
you see something you want, go out and get it.
But you gotta be willing to take the hits. When
you pray for success, you don't pray for jealousy, envy,
or entitlement. But Comminson says, when you do become successful,
those things come along with it. Be mindful of that.

(29:02):
Chase your dreams and remember dreams with our goals are
just dreams that ultimately lead to disappointment. Take the risk
and love hard. Was that thirty seconds and love hard?
You know? I would say something like that because I

(29:27):
I think right now in this world, well, if I'm
being honest, I think we've always been a mess. We've
just done a good job of masking things. But eventually
that bandaid falls off and you see the infection and
that wound, and you see how deep it is, and

(29:49):
it gets deeper and deeper and deeper, and if we
don't address it, eventually we all end up perished. So
I I think I would need more than thirty seconds, Ellen,

(30:11):
But that's what I think. I think that way all
the time, though I see a lot of things and
I just I think we'll get there. It just won't
be in my lifetime. So all right, let's take a
couple more questions. This next question is from Briella and Seattle.

(30:36):
Briella writes, Eli, what's one thing you hope people remember
about you and your work? The one thing I think
I would want people to remember me, or how how
I hope people remember me? That you know I was

(30:57):
a good person. I cared about you, I loved you.
I didn't make it about me. I wanted to see
you win. So if I've ever talked about in any way,

(31:22):
shape or form, I would hope that people would say
this dude loved people, he loved giving back. He didn't
care about the praise. All his joy came from watching
you smile and succeed. And that's how I've always been

(31:46):
my entire life. I feel like I succeed when I
see you succeed. And I'm not afraid to tell you that.

(32:11):
That's how I operate. That's my motivation to watch you
succeed because it helps me succeed, keeps me motivated, helps
me love harder. Anybody that knows me knows that. And
as far as my work, look if you, if you could,

(32:34):
if you, if folks look back on my work, they
find my work and they use my work, or they
edit and make the work better. Then it's been. It's
it's it's all been worth it to me, and that's

(32:58):
how I want to be. Remember. There you have it
all right? Last question, I'm getting emotional here, my goodness.
Last question is from Fiona and Oregon. Fiona Rights, if
you weren't doing all the amazing things you do, thanks Fiona,

(33:22):
Arthur Speaker, Community leader, What would you be doing? Ah?
Great question, Fiona, I what would I be doing? Well?
I don't know. Like I always wanted to be a

(33:45):
baseball player, that's my first love still is. But if
I wasn't doing the things that I was doing now,
I don't I don't know. I really don't know what
I would be doing or where I would be. You know.

(34:06):
That's that's something I need to think about. You know,
I really think about things like that. I am. I'm
so focused and driven by you know, the dreams and
goals that I have and the things that I'm working
on that I really it's rare that I I fall
back and and and ask myself if I wasn't doing

(34:29):
all of this, what would I be doing? I really
don't know, I really don't know, So give me give me,
give me a couple of shows to think about that,
and then maybe we'll revisit this question, or I'm sure
my producer will. He'll add this question in in some
kind of way, uh shape or form in an upcoming show.

(34:54):
But great question for you on a great question. All right, folks,
that said for questions, and we have run out of
time here today again, I want to thank you all
so much for for listening and for downloading. We we
see the live listeners as we are doing the show

(35:15):
here in the studio and I am I am forever grateful.
And we got an email last week that that said,
why does Eli always in the show by saying how
grateful he is, you know, for the listeners and stuff
like that, we support him, like you didn't have to
say that all the time. And I'm like, yeah, well
yes I do, because I I I'm very appreciative of

(35:39):
like the support that everybody continues to give me and
show me. And you know, we we see the show
numbers and so I'm never gonna not say that I'm
not thankful and grateful for your support. I know it's repetitive,

(36:00):
but you all need to know that, like I enjoy
you know, getting up Sunday morning and getting to the
studio and hosting this show. It's because of the feedback
from all of you. I am. I am really grateful
for that. So thank you, and that won't change. Right.

(36:24):
So I thank you for downloading, I thank you for
tuning in. I thank you for the messages and the
comments about the show. It means a lot to me, right.
It means that I'm doing something right, something positive, something
that's impactful, and you know that's how I always want
to be. So with that being said, I want you

(36:45):
to do me a favor this upcoming week. Get out
in your communities and check in on your family and friends.
Put a smile on someone's face. And remember it doesn't
take a lot of energy to do that at all.
Black men, get your colonoscopy exam. There's nothing to be

(37:11):
ashamed of. Thank you for listening to The Elijah Winfrey Show.
Please be sure to download this show wherever you download
your favorite podcast. Until next week, Take care, God bless
Bye bye.