July 17, 2025 • 22 mins
*Special Episode*
Elijah shares his Wellness journey and offers help to others avoid burnout. Tune in!!!
Elijah shares his Wellness journey and offers help to others avoid burnout. Tune in!!!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
You're listening to The Elijah Winfrey Show, a space for inspiration, impact,
and community connection. Each week, Elijah shares the latest on
his work in the community, answers listener questions, and reflects
on the week that was, from acts of kindness to
real conversations that matter. This is where purpose meets positivity.
(00:23):
Sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. Here's your host,
Elijah Winfrey.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Hello, folks, and welcome to The Elijah Winfrey Show. I
want to thank you all for being here today. This
is a very special show and it was one that
I wanted to do for.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
A little while now.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
And whether you're tuning in live, you know, we see
some of you now tuning in it's great, or maybe
you're going to listen to this show later. I would
really appreciate it. And I want to thank you all
for showing up, not just for me, but for yourself.
This is where it starts, right This show is it's
(01:16):
all about wellness. It's all about taking care of you.
And I'm gonna share my journey to those of you
who don't know me and some of you that do.
You've heard me talk about this. I do talk about
this from time to time. But I think it's important
(01:40):
that we take care of ourselves. You know, we can't
do anything in this world if we're not making peace
with ourselves and doing the necessary things to make sure
that we're ready to take on the challenges that the
world throws at us consistently on a daily basis. As
(02:00):
many of you know, I'm a community advocate, I'm a
para educator, I'm a veteran. I write children's books. You know,
I coach a little golf here and there, and you know,
I am the host of this show. But beyond that,
you know, I'm just Sometimes I'm just a person who's
(02:25):
learned the hard way. And if you don't slow down
and rest your body and your mind and your soul,
sometimes your body will force you to do that. I
hosted my first wellness webinar in Springfield, Missouri. Shout out
(02:45):
to the to the wonderful people in Springfield. That was incredible.
I was nervous in the beginning because I don't really
I don't really script anything, and you know that can
be good and bad. You know, I don't judge anybody
(03:06):
for sharing their story their way, and you know this
is this just works for me, you know, I feel
like I'm freer when I can speak from the heart
and you know, make the mistakes that I'm going to
make as opposed to reading from a script verbatim. You know,
(03:29):
I know I'm going to deviate from time to time
from the script. But again for those who read from
a script, that's great. This works for me. I've worn.
I wear a lot of hats I do and everything
(03:49):
that I do, whether it's community work or golf or
you know, spending quality time with family and building relationships.
It it comes with a purpose, but it also comes
with a bit of pressure. Running a nonprofit is extremely difficult.
(04:13):
There are times where I feel absolutely isolated from from
the world and from you know, from people as I
think about the dreams and goals that I would like
to obtain for the nonprofit. It's difficult, you know, being
(04:35):
an advocate in the community raising awareness for autism. It's
extremely hard being a pair of educator. And you know,
I'm in year four of that journey and I'm learning
new I learned new things every time I'm in the
in the school building. Shout out to my amazing pair
of teammates and the teachers and staff. Golf coaching you know,
(05:00):
I work with family friends and you know a couple
of kids who are trying to make their high school team.
Writing children's books is difficult. You know, the thought process
isn't hard in writing the books, but you know, really
getting to work on it and making sure it looks
(05:22):
the way you see it in your head. It's a
lot of work. I write grants for my nonprofit, hosting
this radio show. It's fun, right, but it's there are
times where it's difficult, and there's times that I had
to step away. And in all honesty, all of these
(05:48):
things that I do, you know, I always thought that
I was doing it all for the right reasons, and
I was, and I am. I really enjoyed my work,
but I think sometimes, you know, I do all of
this at the expense of myself. Well, Eli, you can,
(06:10):
you know, you can take a break. Nobody's forcing you
to do X, Y and Z, and you're right, You're right,
and sometimes you're not always thinking that way. I'm not
always thinking that way. You know. I struggle with sleep.
I don't sleep really well, maybe three four hours a
(06:31):
night if I'm lucky. Some days I can't focus. But
I always found myself showing up for everybody else. And
I didn't call it burnout. I don't call it burnout
at the time. I didn't. I do now. I called
(06:54):
it being strong. You can push through, eli, you can
grind it out. That's a that's a that's a buzzword.
Grind it out, pushed through, You're gonna be all right.
But what what I was really doing in all of
(07:15):
this was breaking myself down. I wasn't really being true
to truth. I wasn't really being true to myself. And
every time i'd get up, wash my face, get ready
for the day, you know, sometimes I wouldn't look directly
in the mirror at that reflection. I'm in a hurry
(07:38):
to kind of do good things in the community, do
good things in the classroom. I didn't look at my
tired eyes or or you know, the empty tank I
was running on. And the four smiles that I would
portray from time to time in the community, in school,
(07:59):
or whatever I was doing, those are the signs that
you're burning out.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Burnout doesn't I said this on my post yesterday. Burnout doesn't.
It doesn't show up loud. Sometimes it whispers to you
that you need to slow down, pump the brakes a
little bit. You're doing too much, but that other thing
(08:36):
inside of you tells you to keep pushing. People are
counting on you to say something inspirational or impactful. Rest
is lazy. You don't have the luxury to slow down.
That's what I tell myself sometimes, and I know it's
(09:01):
not the right thing to do. I think as I've
gotten older, I've done a better job at recognizing the things.
Now I have to do a better job of acting
on them. And sometimes we might feel emotionally drained. Right,
Sometimes we're detached from our purpose. We see it, but
(09:23):
we become so overwhelmed with simple tasks that you know,
we're not really paying attention to the science. And sometimes
you lose the joy in your work. Now, I've never
I've never had that happen. There have been times where
I've felt, you know, sort of depressed, but I continue
to push forward. Right. I try not to rest because
(09:50):
I feel like it gives me time to think. Sometimes
you need to slow down to think. But with all
these things happening to me, I knew I had to
do something different. I knew I had to change my
(10:15):
ways if I was going to better myself and help
those in the community really be good with themselves. I
had to start with myself. So I had to have
these hard, long conversations in the morning or midday or
late in the evening about my progress, not throughout my life,
(10:37):
but in that very moment when the signs are clear
that I need to slow down and I need to reclaim.
I need to reclaim my life and do the things
that bring me peace. Right. But in order to do that,
(11:01):
I got to put things in place. Right. I need
tools that are gonna help me be successful, and they're not.
They're not these big tools, right, They're simple tools. Stillness
is one. Right this summer, I had a really busy
(11:23):
schedule plan for myself and for the nonprofit. I've had
to pull that back and remove some things and schedule
stillness time where I'm doing absolutely nothing. No meetings, no
phone calls, no texting, no no social media, gazing, just space,
(11:44):
just stillness to reconnect. Take a deep breath, lay across
the bed and do nothing, no TV, no nothing, Open
the window and just listen and pause. Another one that
(12:05):
I put in my toolbox is reflection. Every week, whether
it's a good week or a bad week, I ask
myself honestly, how am I doing? Not as a coach,
not as a radio host, not as an advocate, not
as a small business owner, not as a dad, not
(12:28):
as a husband, but as me a person? How am
I doing? And I try to answer that question as
honestly and truthfully as I can. And if it's not,
if it's not, if it's not a good answer, then
I have to think about ways to get there. What's
(12:52):
a good better? How for me? What's good about the week?
What could have been better? How do I make that
happen next week? Sometimes you have to be honest with yourself. Right,
put boundaries in place. I love this one. Right. I
(13:13):
have boundaries. That's probably why I only have a handful
of friends. I have boundaries. I used to say yes
to everything, everything, and then I realize sometimes people will
run you over because they know you're gonna say yes,
(13:33):
so they'll use you up. Now I say yes intentionally.
I give you what I can without draining myself. I
know how to say no. I know no is a
complete sentence, and big, you know boundaries is big for me, big, big, big.
(14:00):
I'm not afraid of telling someone no. I've learned some
hard lessons and saying yes all the time. It's important.
I'm leaning on my community, my community more.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
Look I got.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
I got a handful of friends. I don't have a
lot of friends. That's by choice. I have trust issues.
But I've leaned on people who could hold space for me.
If I text them or call them up, I know
they're gonna be there for me. And I know they
(14:41):
got things going on in their lives too, and the
last thing they need is me coming in interrupting their
flow or their peace. Lucky for me, I have a
few friends who are willing to listen to me, even strangers. Sometimes,
even people I don't know. Sometimes I'll start talking and
(15:04):
they just listen without trying to fix me. You're picking
up what I'm putting down. Like being seen sometimes without
people trying to fix you is healing. I'm not looking
(15:25):
for you to give me the answer. I just want
you to hear me. I just want you to see me.
From time to time, I'll say that to people that
are really important to me, thank you for making me
feel seen. You see me. It's so important and my
(15:48):
purpose to do the things that I do. I love
everything I do. I love my community work. I'm working
on loving being a pair of educator. Right. I'm still
working on getting there, but I'm learning not to put
that pressure on myself. I'm trying to remind myself that
that pressure, that that pressure isn't always tied to overworking.
(16:18):
I want to be there as a whole person, not
have whole, and that includes resting. So those are some
of the things that I use for myself that that
it's helped me and putting this show together. I said
(16:40):
to myself, you know, Eli, how can you help others
avoid burnout? Look, I'm no licensed therapist, I'm no psychiatrist.
Let me let me say that first and foremost. The
things that I just shared with you they work for me.
They may not work for someone else, but they work
for me, and I'm willing to share it. So I
(17:05):
encourage you to to check in with yourself. It's not
about what you're doing. It's not about your work. It's
about you. How are you feeling today? You got to
remember that rest is not weakness, it's wisdom. You're recharging,
(17:25):
you're recovering. It's time to refocus, reset and normalize rest.
Lead by example. I try to do that and create
spaces for yourself. What you know, have a go to friend,
(17:51):
or as I do, just sit in stillness, cut everything off, disconnect,
even if it's just for an hour. Disconnect, shut everything
down and reboot yourself. Give yourself that space. It's okay
(18:13):
to not be okay sometimes and to know when you
need to recharge. To make sure those spaces are safe spaces.
Whether you're talking to a friend, make sure that friend
they can be real with you. They're listening, they're not
trying to fix you, you're not looking for an answer. Before
(18:45):
I close the show, I just I want to leave
you with this, this final thought, and it's something that
I think about constantly. Burnout doesn't mean that you're broken.
(19:06):
It can simply mean sometimes that you're breaking without being broken.
It means you've been strong for too long and you've
gone too long without recharging. Let me be the first
to say to you today, it's okay to pause, It's
okay to reset. You're still worthy when you're resting. I've
(19:32):
had to learn that lesson. You're still important, you're still valued,
you're still powerful. When you're quiet, always remember that. I
think sometimes we think we have to be loud consistently,
we don't. Sometimes you're very powerful when you're quiet and
(19:56):
you're processing and you're resetting. My journey isn't perfect. That's
the one thing that I've had to learn in my
fifty two years of living. There's no such thing as perfect.
I know we use it, I still use it, but
there's no such thing as being perfect. My journey isn't perfect,
(20:20):
but it's mine. It's my journey. And if I can
I can share it and it helps one person take
a deep breath, then it's been worth it because I
know eventually it'll spread. So let's keep showing up for
(20:45):
each other. Let's keep lifting each other up. More importantly,
let's making sure we're doing it for ourselves. Also, I
want to thank you all for tuning in today and
(21:11):
listening to me, to me share my journey. It's got
a lot of ups and downs. I don't regret anything,
because I don't think I would be in this moment
if I did. I am very appreciative of my family
and my friends that are in my life that check
(21:32):
up on me consistently. And look, I know we all
get busy, and you know that's okay. You don't need
to call me every day to check in or anything,
but I appreciate those in my life who want to
(21:53):
know how I'm doing, and I enjoy checking up on
my friends and family as well. So as we keep
striving and setting goals for ourselves, make sure you're making
peace with the mirror. That is the first step. Do
(22:17):
not be afraid to fall back, take a break, because again,
burnout is in loud it whispers. Thank you for tuning
in to the Elijah Winfree Show. Please be sure to
download this show wherever you download your favorite podcast. Till
(22:41):
next Tuesday. Take care, God bless Bye bye
You're listening to The Elijah Winfrey Show, a space for inspiration, impact,
and community connection. Each week, Elijah shares the latest on
his work in the community, answers listener questions, and reflects
on the week that was, from acts of kindness to
real conversations that matter. This is where purpose meets positivity.
(00:23):
Sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. Here's your host,
Elijah Winfrey.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Hello, folks, and welcome to The Elijah Winfrey Show. I
want to thank you all for being here today. This
is a very special show and it was one that
I wanted to do for.
Speaker 1 (00:51):
A little while now.
Speaker 2 (00:53):
And whether you're tuning in live, you know, we see
some of you now tuning in it's great, or maybe
you're going to listen to this show later. I would
really appreciate it. And I want to thank you all
for showing up, not just for me, but for yourself.
This is where it starts, right This show is it's
(01:16):
all about wellness. It's all about taking care of you.
And I'm gonna share my journey to those of you
who don't know me and some of you that do.
You've heard me talk about this. I do talk about
this from time to time. But I think it's important
(01:40):
that we take care of ourselves. You know, we can't
do anything in this world if we're not making peace
with ourselves and doing the necessary things to make sure
that we're ready to take on the challenges that the
world throws at us consistently on a daily basis. As
(02:00):
many of you know, I'm a community advocate, I'm a
para educator, I'm a veteran. I write children's books. You know,
I coach a little golf here and there, and you know,
I am the host of this show. But beyond that,
you know, I'm just Sometimes I'm just a person who's
(02:25):
learned the hard way. And if you don't slow down
and rest your body and your mind and your soul,
sometimes your body will force you to do that. I
hosted my first wellness webinar in Springfield, Missouri. Shout out
(02:45):
to the to the wonderful people in Springfield. That was incredible.
I was nervous in the beginning because I don't really
I don't really script anything, and you know that can
be good and bad. You know, I don't judge anybody
(03:06):
for sharing their story their way, and you know this
is this just works for me, you know, I feel
like I'm freer when I can speak from the heart
and you know, make the mistakes that I'm going to
make as opposed to reading from a script verbatim. You know,
(03:29):
I know I'm going to deviate from time to time
from the script. But again for those who read from
a script, that's great. This works for me. I've worn.
I wear a lot of hats I do and everything
(03:49):
that I do, whether it's community work or golf or
you know, spending quality time with family and building relationships.
It it comes with a purpose, but it also comes
with a bit of pressure. Running a nonprofit is extremely difficult.
(04:13):
There are times where I feel absolutely isolated from from
the world and from you know, from people as I
think about the dreams and goals that I would like
to obtain for the nonprofit. It's difficult, you know, being
(04:35):
an advocate in the community raising awareness for autism. It's
extremely hard being a pair of educator. And you know,
I'm in year four of that journey and I'm learning
new I learned new things every time I'm in the
in the school building. Shout out to my amazing pair
of teammates and the teachers and staff. Golf coaching you know,
(05:00):
I work with family friends and you know a couple
of kids who are trying to make their high school team.
Writing children's books is difficult. You know, the thought process
isn't hard in writing the books, but you know, really
getting to work on it and making sure it looks
(05:22):
the way you see it in your head. It's a
lot of work. I write grants for my nonprofit, hosting
this radio show. It's fun, right, but it's there are
times where it's difficult, and there's times that I had
to step away. And in all honesty, all of these
(05:48):
things that I do, you know, I always thought that
I was doing it all for the right reasons, and
I was, and I am. I really enjoyed my work,
but I think sometimes, you know, I do all of
this at the expense of myself. Well, Eli, you can,
(06:10):
you know, you can take a break. Nobody's forcing you
to do X, Y and Z, and you're right, You're right,
and sometimes you're not always thinking that way. I'm not
always thinking that way. You know. I struggle with sleep.
I don't sleep really well, maybe three four hours a
(06:31):
night if I'm lucky. Some days I can't focus. But
I always found myself showing up for everybody else. And
I didn't call it burnout. I don't call it burnout
at the time. I didn't. I do now. I called
(06:54):
it being strong. You can push through, eli, you can
grind it out. That's a that's a that's a buzzword.
Grind it out, pushed through, You're gonna be all right.
But what what I was really doing in all of
(07:15):
this was breaking myself down. I wasn't really being true
to truth. I wasn't really being true to myself. And
every time i'd get up, wash my face, get ready
for the day, you know, sometimes I wouldn't look directly
in the mirror at that reflection. I'm in a hurry
(07:38):
to kind of do good things in the community, do
good things in the classroom. I didn't look at my
tired eyes or or you know, the empty tank I
was running on. And the four smiles that I would
portray from time to time in the community, in school,
(07:59):
or whatever I was doing, those are the signs that
you're burning out.
Speaker 1 (08:10):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:13):
Burnout doesn't I said this on my post yesterday. Burnout doesn't.
It doesn't show up loud. Sometimes it whispers to you
that you need to slow down, pump the brakes a
little bit. You're doing too much, but that other thing
(08:36):
inside of you tells you to keep pushing. People are
counting on you to say something inspirational or impactful. Rest
is lazy. You don't have the luxury to slow down.
That's what I tell myself sometimes, and I know it's
(09:01):
not the right thing to do. I think as I've
gotten older, I've done a better job at recognizing the things.
Now I have to do a better job of acting
on them. And sometimes we might feel emotionally drained. Right,
Sometimes we're detached from our purpose. We see it, but
(09:23):
we become so overwhelmed with simple tasks that you know,
we're not really paying attention to the science. And sometimes
you lose the joy in your work. Now, I've never
I've never had that happen. There have been times where
I've felt, you know, sort of depressed, but I continue
to push forward. Right. I try not to rest because
(09:50):
I feel like it gives me time to think. Sometimes
you need to slow down to think. But with all
these things happening to me, I knew I had to
do something different. I knew I had to change my
(10:15):
ways if I was going to better myself and help
those in the community really be good with themselves. I
had to start with myself. So I had to have
these hard, long conversations in the morning or midday or
late in the evening about my progress, not throughout my life,
(10:37):
but in that very moment when the signs are clear
that I need to slow down and I need to reclaim.
I need to reclaim my life and do the things
that bring me peace. Right. But in order to do that,
(11:01):
I got to put things in place. Right. I need
tools that are gonna help me be successful, and they're not.
They're not these big tools, right, They're simple tools. Stillness
is one. Right this summer, I had a really busy
(11:23):
schedule plan for myself and for the nonprofit. I've had
to pull that back and remove some things and schedule
stillness time where I'm doing absolutely nothing. No meetings, no
phone calls, no texting, no no social media, gazing, just space,
(11:44):
just stillness to reconnect. Take a deep breath, lay across
the bed and do nothing, no TV, no nothing, Open
the window and just listen and pause. Another one that
(12:05):
I put in my toolbox is reflection. Every week, whether
it's a good week or a bad week, I ask
myself honestly, how am I doing? Not as a coach,
not as a radio host, not as an advocate, not
as a small business owner, not as a dad, not
(12:28):
as a husband, but as me a person? How am
I doing? And I try to answer that question as
honestly and truthfully as I can. And if it's not,
if it's not, if it's not a good answer, then
I have to think about ways to get there. What's
(12:52):
a good better? How for me? What's good about the week?
What could have been better? How do I make that
happen next week? Sometimes you have to be honest with yourself. Right,
put boundaries in place. I love this one. Right. I
(13:13):
have boundaries. That's probably why I only have a handful
of friends. I have boundaries. I used to say yes
to everything, everything, and then I realize sometimes people will
run you over because they know you're gonna say yes,
(13:33):
so they'll use you up. Now I say yes intentionally.
I give you what I can without draining myself. I
know how to say no. I know no is a
complete sentence, and big, you know boundaries is big for me, big, big, big.
(14:00):
I'm not afraid of telling someone no. I've learned some
hard lessons and saying yes all the time. It's important.
I'm leaning on my community, my community more.
Speaker 1 (14:16):
Look I got.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
I got a handful of friends. I don't have a
lot of friends. That's by choice. I have trust issues.
But I've leaned on people who could hold space for me.
If I text them or call them up, I know
they're gonna be there for me. And I know they
(14:41):
got things going on in their lives too, and the
last thing they need is me coming in interrupting their
flow or their peace. Lucky for me, I have a
few friends who are willing to listen to me, even strangers. Sometimes,
even people I don't know. Sometimes I'll start talking and
(15:04):
they just listen without trying to fix me. You're picking
up what I'm putting down. Like being seen sometimes without
people trying to fix you is healing. I'm not looking
(15:25):
for you to give me the answer. I just want
you to hear me. I just want you to see me.
From time to time, I'll say that to people that
are really important to me, thank you for making me
feel seen. You see me. It's so important and my
(15:48):
purpose to do the things that I do. I love
everything I do. I love my community work. I'm working
on loving being a pair of educator. Right. I'm still
working on getting there, but I'm learning not to put
that pressure on myself. I'm trying to remind myself that
that pressure, that that pressure isn't always tied to overworking.
(16:18):
I want to be there as a whole person, not
have whole, and that includes resting. So those are some
of the things that I use for myself that that
it's helped me and putting this show together. I said
(16:40):
to myself, you know, Eli, how can you help others
avoid burnout? Look, I'm no licensed therapist, I'm no psychiatrist.
Let me let me say that first and foremost. The
things that I just shared with you they work for me.
They may not work for someone else, but they work
for me, and I'm willing to share it. So I
(17:05):
encourage you to to check in with yourself. It's not
about what you're doing. It's not about your work. It's
about you. How are you feeling today? You got to
remember that rest is not weakness, it's wisdom. You're recharging,
(17:25):
you're recovering. It's time to refocus, reset and normalize rest.
Lead by example. I try to do that and create
spaces for yourself. What you know, have a go to friend,
(17:51):
or as I do, just sit in stillness, cut everything off, disconnect,
even if it's just for an hour. Disconnect, shut everything
down and reboot yourself. Give yourself that space. It's okay
(18:13):
to not be okay sometimes and to know when you
need to recharge. To make sure those spaces are safe spaces.
Whether you're talking to a friend, make sure that friend
they can be real with you. They're listening, they're not
trying to fix you, you're not looking for an answer. Before
(18:45):
I close the show, I just I want to leave
you with this, this final thought, and it's something that
I think about constantly. Burnout doesn't mean that you're broken.
(19:06):
It can simply mean sometimes that you're breaking without being broken.
It means you've been strong for too long and you've
gone too long without recharging. Let me be the first
to say to you today, it's okay to pause, It's
okay to reset. You're still worthy when you're resting. I've
(19:32):
had to learn that lesson. You're still important, you're still valued,
you're still powerful. When you're quiet, always remember that. I
think sometimes we think we have to be loud consistently,
we don't. Sometimes you're very powerful when you're quiet and
(19:56):
you're processing and you're resetting. My journey isn't perfect. That's
the one thing that I've had to learn in my
fifty two years of living. There's no such thing as perfect.
I know we use it, I still use it, but
there's no such thing as being perfect. My journey isn't perfect,
(20:20):
but it's mine. It's my journey. And if I can
I can share it and it helps one person take
a deep breath, then it's been worth it because I
know eventually it'll spread. So let's keep showing up for
(20:45):
each other. Let's keep lifting each other up. More importantly,
let's making sure we're doing it for ourselves. Also, I
want to thank you all for tuning in today and
(21:11):
listening to me, to me share my journey. It's got
a lot of ups and downs. I don't regret anything,
because I don't think I would be in this moment
if I did. I am very appreciative of my family
and my friends that are in my life that check
(21:32):
up on me consistently. And look, I know we all
get busy, and you know that's okay. You don't need
to call me every day to check in or anything,
but I appreciate those in my life who want to
(21:53):
know how I'm doing, and I enjoy checking up on
my friends and family as well. So as we keep
striving and setting goals for ourselves, make sure you're making
peace with the mirror. That is the first step. Do
(22:17):
not be afraid to fall back, take a break, because again,
burnout is in loud it whispers. Thank you for tuning
in to the Elijah Winfree Show. Please be sure to
download this show wherever you download your favorite podcast. Till
(22:41):
next Tuesday. Take care, God bless Bye bye
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