The Elijah Winfrey Show

This week Elijah answers tons of email questions centered around his work in the community, friendship, writing books, & more! Be sure to tune in.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:03):
You're listening to The Elijah Winfrey Show, a space for inspiration, impact,
and community connection. Each week, Elijah shares the latest on
his work in the community, answers listener questions, and reflects
on the week that was, from acts of kindness to
real conversations that matter. This is where purpose meets positivity.

(00:23):
Sit back, relax, and enjoy the show. Here's your host,
Elijah Winfrey.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hello, folks, and welcome to the Elijah Winfrey Show. I
am indeed your host, Elijah Winfrey, and today is a
very special episode. We are going to try something different today.
We're going to try to break these questions up in
segments that you all have sent in. We've added more

(00:54):
questions this week based on the emails that you've all
sent in wanting to have more questions answered. So my
producer went to work on that, and so we're going
to extend the show a little bit today. It's gonna
go a little longer, which is fine by me. I

(01:16):
love answering these questions each and every week, and you know,
we're going to see how this works out and breaking
them down into segments. I'm excited about it. My producer
is as well. I hope that your Sunday has gotten
off to a good start. I hope that your weekend
has progressed really well. My weekend it's gone really well.

(01:39):
I've been able to really rest and reflect. You know,
it was a busy It's been a busy weekend. But
because of my new I like to call it my
wellness schedule, I've been able to really take some much

(02:00):
needed breaks this weekend and reflect. You know, I haven't
taken my traditional weekend walk as yet. I may do
it this afternoon, but all is well. As I hope
that all is well with you. I hope that you're
taking this day to reflect and reset and recharge, do

(02:25):
whatever you need to do to get ready for the
week ahead. My family's doing really well. We celebrated my
son's fifteenth birthday, fifteen years young time flies man. I gosh,
he's as tall as me. He's about six' two, NOW

(02:48):
i want to, say and he's got me locked in that,
department and you know he Enjoys he enjoys that a.
Lot but he didn't want to. CELEBRATE i got Home
friday and the plan was to take him to the
mall and take him. Shopping you, know he loves. Shoes

(03:15):
but on the way, HOME i was on the phone
with my wife and she, said, no he wanted to
spend his birthday hanging out with his, friends which is
looked fine by. Me you, know he likes to be laid.
BACK i don't think he really cares to be celebrated as,
much kind of like. Yours, TRULY i don't really care

(03:40):
for being. Celebrated kind of makes me, uncomfortable to be
honest with. YOU i love celebrating other. People i'm not
opposed to, it But i'm not forcing. Anything and So
jordan is kind of like that as. Well and in
a small, WAY i really appreciate, that you, know kind

(04:01):
of being laid, back and he's not motivated by materialistic.
Things you, know yes he loves, shoes but it's not
the end all and be. All so we did That,
friday and and the missus is doing. Well we're hanging
in there and trying to take advantage of you, know

(04:21):
this this good weather that we're having before it turns
back to grace guys and rainy. Days all in, all
it's been a good. Week my role as a para
professional or para, educator however you want to say that
has gone. Well you, know this upcoming week will be

(04:43):
the first full, week but you know it's it's business as,
usual you, know pretty busy throughout the day in the
in the school and getting acclimated with with the students
and the teachers you know all as, well and hopefully
we'll continue to build on on up of. THAT i
love the the new leadership in the. Building they're doing.

(05:07):
Fantastic and As i've said, before you, know it's it's
it's a. Marathon it's not a, sprint, Right it's gonna
take the entire school year to ingrain some things and
and and really get comfortable and feel, like you, know
you're seeing. Progress so all is well on that. Front

(05:27):
some of you send in questions last week about being
seen On iheart's App. Spreaker the show is on that,
app and we do see. You as a matter of,
fact we see you all right now lighting up the,

(05:48):
switchboard so we we we do see. You thanks for
asking about. That we are definitely live and in the,
studio so continue to support, us, yes because we do
see you out. THERE a lot of you ask me
about my you, know about my. Balance you, know HOW
i balance my time and what drives my community, work

(06:10):
and you know the role family plays or friendships and
books and teaching and things like. That we're going to
cover all of that today in these, segments And i'll
close the show by digging into something you KNOW i
hold close to my, heart that's. Purpose so as always

(06:34):
continue to send your questions into me or to the
show At elijah Dot winfrey at gmail dot, com and
we will do our very best to get these questions
on the show and get them. Answered AND i know
some of the questions are are kind of the. Same
there's a lot of you write in with some of

(06:55):
the same same, questions But i'll do my best to
try to answer each of them differently if, possible and
IF i, can't you'll you'll most likely get the same.
Answer we really do appreciate the support, Too like we
have a ton of questions this, week and shout out
to my amazing, Producer Greg, nice who always always puts

(07:18):
this show in positions to. Succeed we're doing well On,
iHeart we're doing well On, Apple, SPOTIFY i think we're On,
google but we're on most podcasting. Platforms once he breaks
this show down and gets it out there to the.
Masses so thank you so much to all of you

(07:38):
for making the show a, success and thank you to
Mister Greg. Nice all, right further without further, ado let's
get into some of these questions this. Week this first
question is From marcus In, Atlanta. Georgia Marcus, Wrights, elijah
with everything you do from running your, nonprofit coaching, golf
being a pair of, educator writing, books and hosting this,

(08:01):
show how do you balance or how do you set
time aside for each role without burning? Out that's a good.
QUESTION i think this SUMMER i was able to really
reflect on things like, this you, know BECAUSE i. COULD
i could do one thing and run right to the

(08:24):
other one without resetting or taking a. Break And i'd
like to think THAT i was very good at. That
but there's there's also a price to be paid when
you when you go, NonStop and you, Know I've i've
paid the price a few, times, Right I've i've burned
a candle at both ends a couple of times by

(08:46):
thinking That i'm invincible OR i, CAN i. Can i'm
strong enough to push, through you. KNOW i THINK i
needed balance in that department to really see which Direction
i'm going. In all of those, things and sometimes you,

(09:08):
KNOW i may be doing well in one or, two
but Then i'm lacking in the. Others and SO i
think this, summer by pulling back from some commitments and
kind of resetting my my, schedule it allowed me to
see some things more clearer and really see the DIRECTION

(09:28):
i was going in my writing skills and and hosting the.
Show and you, KNOW i, think so, far so. Good
you KNOW i. Am i'm definitely taking more time between each.
Thing you, know When i'm When i'm done as a
as a, PARAPROFESSIONAL i come, HOME i may take an

(09:55):
hour or so to, reset kind of rest a, bit
and then jump into my nonprofit. Duties and you, KNOW
i THINK i feel Like i'm better WHEN i do.
That i'm able to comprehend and and share more realistic.
Ideas and that's not to say THAT i didn't, before

(10:17):
BUT i think when you when you pull back and
you give yourself time to refocus or reflect or take a,
break and then you jump into the next, ACTIVITY i
think it's it's better for you both mentally and. Physically
and you, know things are working. Out SO i would, Say,

(10:38):
Marcus i'm giving myself like maybe an hour in between
things to kind of really make SURE i am WHERE
i need to be, mentally and so far it's it's
it's working out really. Well next question is From sophia In.
Seattle Sophia, rights do you have a daily or weekly

(11:00):
routine that helps you stay grounded and? Focus, YEAH i
would SAY i have a. Routine it's here's the THING i.
DON'T i don't really sleep well, still, right AND i
think it's getting it's getting. WORSE i hate to say

(11:23):
that on the, air you, know BUT i am doing
the proper things that are necessary to to make sure
THAT i. AM i am my best self And i'm
as healthy as. Possible so my routines are you, know
If i'm waking up from a, NIGHTMARE i slowly start

(11:44):
to start the, day and that day can start at
one thirty in the morning or two in the, morning
or maybe even three in the. Morning, Right BUT i
do have a. Routine Once i'm, up you, KNOW i
slowly start to transition and transition into. Meditating and Once

(12:06):
i'm done with, that and that's been unbelievable by the.
Way that's that's kind of it kind of sets the
tone for me WHEN i can sit and meditate after
a nightmare or having a rough night of. Sleep SO
i start with meditation and THEN i ease my way
into my. WORKOUTS i kind of sit and reflect, on you,

(12:28):
know the night that, was AND i don't take a
large amount of, time you, know maybe ten, minutes BUT
i reflect and THEN i move right Because i'm ready
to attack the. Day so after my, workout you, Know
i'm in the, shower i am getting my son's lunch,

(12:48):
ready kind of picking up around the. House. Right it's
like a, routine AND i do it, slowly Like i'm
not in a. Rush. RIGHT i do things pretty slowly
to reserve as much energy energy As i'm gonna need
throughout the. Day and it doesn't sound like a, Lot,

(13:10):
sophia but it's, working, Right SO i feel like my
body's on on this, plan like it knows What, i'm
What i'm WHAT i need to. Do And i've done
it for a. WHILE i, have and there have been
moments where it's not as centered as it should, be

(13:32):
but it's, consistent you, Know AND i think as long
as it's, working you, Know i'm not gonna deviate or try,
to you, know change it. Up so that that's my.
Routine as vanilla as it, sounds it works for. Me

(13:54):
next question is From jeremiah In. Dallas he, writes what's
one thing you've had to sacrifice in order to do
the work you do in the. Community, god that's a great.
Question the one Thing i've had to SACRIFICE i. DON'T

(14:17):
i don't really know If i've had to sacrifice anything
like this has been something That i've wanted to. Do
it's always been a large part of my, life even
WHEN i was a. Kid you, KNOW i don't have
A i guess you could, SAY i don't know if

(14:37):
this would make, sense but maybe, friendships you, know not
THAT i have a, Lot LIKE i have a very small.
Circle it's a tight circle of. Friends i'm Not i'm
not out and about like a lot of. People and
there's nothing wrong with, that by the, way you, KNOW
i THINK i would probably, say like being more, Social

(15:05):
i've had to sacrifice that And i've had to pick
and choose my spots and that department because of the
work THAT i. Do sometimes everybody wants to be your,
friend and you have to like really do like these
mental background checks on, people and you have to, say
you know you're going to have to, forego you, know

(15:28):
those friendships in order to be successful in your in
your work in the. Community SO i would THINK i
would say it Be i've had to sacrifice making more.
Friends and you, Know i've been okay with that BECAUSE
i think people who really vibe with you and really
rock with, you they see you doing the. Work you,

(15:50):
know they're there patiently waiting for those happy hours or
those you, know funny conversations that you'll have about your
day or something that you you you've seem funny or or,
uh getting to know you a little bit. More, Right

(16:10):
SO i would, say Probably i've had to sacrifice. Friendships
and you, Know i'll say this before we hit into
we you, know move on to the next. Segment balance
is is in all of this, stuff it's never. Perfect
right to, Me it's about priorities and. Perspective that's that's

(16:35):
kind of HOW i. Operate you. Know if if it's
it's if it's meant to be, organically it'll. Happen if,
not it. Won't and that's HOW i see. It i've
never been part of a clique or, crew Or i've

(16:58):
never had a ton of, Friends SO i think in
a lot of. Ways it's been a good thing for,
me and it's allowed me to kind of do the
work That i'm. Doing, so you, know you, know the
MORE i think about, it, now, yeah MAYBE i think
sacrificing that part of my life has been has been
fine BECAUSE i do eventually make friends with the work

(17:25):
THAT i. Do it's just at a slower pace Because
i'm not sitting in one spot for too. Long you,
Know i'm there and Then i'm moving. Right all, Right
let's jump in a segment. Two community purpose and advocacy.
Work this is something THAT i. Love this question comes
From aliyah In. Detroit lea, writes what drives your passion

(17:49):
for giving back through your? NONPROFIT i want to see
everybody get the help that they, need and IF i
can do, that whether it be in a big way
or a small, WAY i want to be a part of.
It and you, Know, Aliyah i've learned. That you, Know

(18:15):
i'm not for, everybody AND i get. It everybody's not for.
Me you. Know my passion is seeing and helping WHEREVER i.
Can it drives my. Purpose i'm so passionate, about you,

(18:37):
know the work THAT i do and the families THAT
i interact with or the the golf students THAT i work.
With LIKE I i'm so passionate about seeing them be
successful THAT i will do anything to make sure that
it happens for. Them not in a reckless, way you,

(18:58):
Know but my nonprofit is very very important to, me
and you, Know i've always felt like it was a.
CALLING i love keeping the door open for others and
extending my hand and bringing them. THROUGH i can't drag you,

(19:23):
through BUT i can extend my hand and help you
up and get you in the. Door so you, KNOW
i think not having much as a kid also drives
me as a, Person, Right it's part of that passion

(19:43):
of giving. BACK i know who helped my, family and in,
turn you, Know i'm just trying to do the same
as an. Adult So i'm very passionate about giving back
and making it about, them not. ME i know you

(20:07):
see me on your social media WHEN i post things
about the work That i'm. Doing it's not for, cloud you,
Know i'm not chasing. Lights i'm hoping that by sharing
my work it inspires others to want to do something
in their. Community, right Maybe i'm the spark WHEN i

(20:27):
make those. Posts great, question next question is From carlos In, Phoenix.
Arizona carlos, writes what's the biggest lesson you've learned while
serving families in? Need the biggest? Lesson there are a
bunch of Lessons i've learned in doing the work THAT i.

(20:48):
DO i think one of them, is you, know everyone
is in need of a, voice. Right not every family
has the same, story all. Right sometimes you learn more
about yourself in the work that you. Do, like there

(21:11):
are a lot of things That I've i've learned about.
Myself i've learned more about being patient WHEN i don't
have the, answers you, know to tell these families you
know about services or about ways that we can, help,
Right because maybe my nonprofit isn't isn't the nonprofit that's

(21:34):
going to help this, Family BUT i know many nonprofits
in the community that can help and service these. Families
and so that's a lesson because sometimes when you in the,
beginning you think you're the end all be all, right
you kind of block out that there are other nonprofits
who are, bigger have more, resources and are able to

(21:55):
like jump on these issues right, away and you feel.
Slighted so that one of those lessons That i've had
to learn about myself and my organization is that you,
know you feel like you can't, help but in directing
them to other services that can get them the needs, faster,

(22:17):
right that is. Helping that is. Positivity. Right So i've
had to learn to lose that ego in the business
world to a, degree and it's it's a learning. Experience,

(22:44):
yes it puts a lot of things in, perspective AND
i think you become better for. It i've learned to
have great patience when you're interacting with families who are
very passionate about what's not happening you know at that current,
moment or what is. Happening i've had to learn to

(23:12):
really listen and understand what they're saying to. Me that's a.
LESSON i think sometimes we think we have the, answers
and so we block out a lot of the conversations
because we think we know what they're going to say
and what direction they're gonna. Go So i've had to
learn to really, listen be, patient and then. Process and

(23:34):
those are big lessons when you're dealing with families in the,
community because sometimes you don't get the story in its.
Entirety you need, that but you don't always get, that
and so you have to be patient and let them
continue to open up to. You and a lot of
times they, do they really. Do next question is From

(23:59):
vanessa In New York. City but that's the. Rights when
the work feels, heavy what reminds you that it's worth?
It great, Question. VANESSA i think when it gets heavy
for me or for, US i think we remind ourselves

(24:27):
what are we in it? For it's not about, us
it's Not it's about the journey that the family's going.
Through and can you somehow relate to? THAT i can
every family that we've worked. WITH i can relate on
a personal level because of my. UPBRINGING i know what

(24:50):
it's like to not have, anything AND i have the,
resources you, know to have access to things that you.
NEED i know what that feels. Like that never leaves
my body or my. Soul so whenever it gets, hard
or it gets, heavy or whatever you want to call,
IT i think about my, childhood or MAYBE i think

(25:11):
about a family That i've just worked, with and it's
a constant reminder that we all need each. Other at
the end of the, day IF i got, It i'm
willing to give it to, you AND i try to

(25:31):
put myself in their positions as much AS i can
from a realistic point of. VIEW i try to sit
in it to get a better understanding SO i. Know
SO i don't do a lot of talking When i'm
listening to these. FUMIS i do more, processing But i'm
listening And i'm feeling where they're coming. From so when

(25:55):
it gets heavy for, US i think we remind ourselves
while we do what we, do why it's important to do,
It and you try to relate as much as you,
can and you know that feeling should never go. Away
it should never go, away in my, opinion and you

(26:16):
know that is what makes it all worth it for
us at. Teammate next question is From lauren In, Minneapolis.
Minnesota lauren, writes how important is it to have dreams
and goals and how do you keep yourself motivated to

(26:36):
chase them when life gets? Tough great, Question. Lauren i've
often said to you know groups THAT i mentor that you,
know dreams without goals or just dreams that ultimately feel.
Disappointment SO i think it's important to have, dreams but

(26:57):
you've got to have the goals to go with. It
and one of the WAYS i keep myself, motivated you,
know with my dreams and goals IS i try to
stay in the journey as much as. POSSIBLE i think
sometimes we get so caught up, on you, know the end.
Result we see that right, away, right we see what

(27:20):
that looks, like that we forget about the. Journey. Right
that's where the fun. Is that's where a motivation. Is
the motivation and falling, down getting up and getting back
on the road or on the track and pushing. Forward
SO i stay motivated by staying in the journey those,

(27:41):
moments because those moments are the most impactful. Moments. Right
BUT i think it's very important to have dreams and.
Goals that's how we all ultimately. Function. Right we see
these ideas in our heads that we want to. Achieve
now we have to set a list of, goals you,

(28:02):
know as as to how we obtain all of. That
and it's not, easy but it's not supposed to. Be
SO i keep myself motivated by staying in the. JOURNEY
i love that part of, it you. KNOW i love
the building. PART i know what the end game looks.

(28:25):
LIKE i played that over and over and. Over it's
like when you when you want to be a baseball
player as a, kid and you and you you're in
the backyard and you're. Practicing you're always saying to, yourself
here comes to. Pitch he hits the home. Run, right
so you go right to the, end like you get
the home. Run you're not talking about or you're not thinking.
About you, know there's a. Strike, Okay now he steps

(28:46):
out of the batter's. Box he kind of. Readjusts he's thinking,
about you, know the next pitch that may be. Coming
is it a, curve is it a? Fastball is it
a change? Up you, know it's no different in in
in the work that you. Do, RIGHT i think about
the next. Meeting what is going to be like sitting

(29:06):
in that, room you, know giving this presentation or talking
to these, Families, like you, KNOW i know what the
end looks. Like but this is the most exciting part
Because i'm sitting in here not knowing what's gonna happen
right in this. Journey But i'm willing to partake in
it because that's where the fun, is that's where the building.

(29:27):
Is that's what a motivation. Is. Right the problem solved
to critically think what's the next move or what AM
i going to say to maybe this question that may be, asked,
right how AM i going to? Process it's that part is.
Motivating but always remember you got to have both dreams and.

(29:49):
Goals you can't just have. Dreams you can't just dream
it if you're not gonna work for. It and there's
one thing that you got to have pertaining to dreams and.
Goals you must have. This your will has to be
greater than your. Skills if you're gonna obtain these dreams

(30:09):
and you're gonna set these, goals you have to remember
you're gonna have days where you want to throw in a.
Towel those are the most important days pertaining to dreams and.
Goals your will has to be greater than your skill
set or you or or your talent and obtaining those,
Goals so keep that in. Mind next question is From

(30:34):
tyrell And, Newark New. Jersey Tyrell, rights what advice would
you give someone who feels like their dreams are too
big or out of? REACH i don't think they're ever
too big or out of reach unless you're not willing
to put in the. Work if you're willing to put
in the, work you'll get. There you have to remember

(30:57):
that nothing happens. Instantly you don't just dream it and it.
Happens sometimes you gotta go through the fire and it's,
hard but you gotta be willing to take the risk

(31:20):
if that's what you really want to do with your.
Life whatever it, is, lawyer, doctor, athlete whatever it, is
you gotta be willing to put in the. Work it's
never out of. Reach it's your. Dream you see, it

(31:42):
you see. It you just have to be willing to
put in the work and take the risk and enjoy the.
Process if you do, THAT i can almost guarantee you
you'll get. There but be prepared to fall, down be
prepared to make. Mistakes AND i think that's where a

(32:05):
lot of people they stop because it gets too, tough
or they think it's too big of a, dream so
they condense it. Down they maybe take a shortcut that
they think will get them there and ultimately, don't and
they get more frustrated and then they, just you, know
they completely they completely give. Up and you. Shouldn't no

(32:39):
dream is ever too big as long as you're willing
to put in the. Work always remember. That next question
is From kimberly And Raleigh North. Carolina kimberly, asks as
someone raising awareness for, autism what's the most important thing
you wish more people understood about individuals on the. Spectrum great, Question.
Kimberly as most of you, KNOW i am an autism.

(33:02):
ADVOCATE i think one of the most important THINGS i
wish people understood more about autism is that the spectrum is.
Broad it's a wide ranging. Spectrum not one person is
the same that you. Encounter you, KNOW i give talks

(33:22):
In spring For missouri every. SUMMER i do a lot
of work here In Washington state in the. Community I've
i've met and interacted with families with kids on the.
Spectrum everyone's different in a good, way in a great.
Way and you, KNOW i wish more people understood. THAT

(33:47):
i wish we talked about that. More AND i hear
people say, often, oh you, know these kids on the
spectrum arek are really really? Smart they? Are they. ARE

(34:14):
i think we have to continue to open doors for
these types of conversations to be, had AND i really
wish people would really, listen sit down and, listen not,
talk but just listen to a lot of these families
or a lot of these kiddles talk about their journey

(34:36):
and what they see and what they. Feel so that's
that's one of the THINGS i wish individuals understood more
about the spectrum that it's just it's a wide ranging.
Spectrum and my former co Host Tony, bouche great. Friend you,

(34:58):
know we would talk about this a lot on the,
show and you, know it's something that we've chatted about
for a long time and that we've, seen you, know
there's a lack of understanding in that. Department that was

(35:20):
a great, Question. Kimberly next question is From jason In Kansas.
City jason, Writes, elijah through your nonprofit, work what have
you learned about the unique challenges low income families face
and how can communities better support. THEM i think when

(35:47):
you say, UNIQUE i Think i'm hoping that you mean
that every family is, different like there's a different set of. Challenges,
YES i think the world is getting more expensive right
wherever you. Go the cost of living is just it's going.

(36:08):
Up and you, know the job that you may, have
if you're you, know you come from a low income,
background it's not really able to pay the. Bills AND
i think a lot of families struggle with. THAT a
lot of families are living paycheck to, paycheck one paycheck

(36:30):
away from disaster or being. Homeless and, again as a,
kid you, KNOW i know what it's like to have
nothing and be one paycheck. AWAY i know what it's
like to be on food. Stemps SO i can relate

(36:51):
to a lot of this. STUFF i can. Listen i'm
not we're not. Rich now we're, Comfortable we're not. Rich
it can happen to anybody at any. Time and WHEN
i visit these areas Or i'm on a zoom call
with these, families you listen to these stories about you,

(37:13):
know some of these moms and dads are working sixty
seventy hours and, still you, know because of the amount
of money that they're making or they're not, making they're
not able to pay their bills or their short on,
rent or the light build or the water bill or

(37:34):
whatever it is right keeping food on the, table gas
in the. Car it's a lot of. Challenges AND i
think one of the ways as a community community that
we can best serve these families is by. Listening and
if you have things to offer that will help, families

(37:56):
you should absolutely help because a lot of families are,
embarrassed are embarrassed to talk about their. SITUATION i would
BE i don't know. YOU i don't know. YOU i

(38:19):
don't really want to trust you with telling you how
how tough it is for my family to keep food
on the. TABLE i don't know what breakfast is coming.
FROM i don't know what we're gonna have for lunch and.
Dinner Like i'm putting something, together you, know just to
make ends. Meet SO i think if they're able to open,

(38:42):
up you should. Listen and if you see something in
the community and you know you can, help you Should
it doesn't have to be monetary. Either maybe it's closing
your closet that you know w wear you can donate.
Right maybe their kids are in need of, Clothes maybe

(39:05):
they're in need of. Clothes What i'm saying is it
doesn't matter how big or how. SMALL i say that a,
lot by the, way it doesn't matter how big or
small your donations, are whether it's, money, clothes or. Food
if you have it to, give you should. Give and

(39:25):
you have to remember none of us are immune from those,
situations none of. Us AND i think sometimes we take
that for. Granted i'm not saying, that you, know we're
Selfish i'm just saying sometimes we we we get on

(39:49):
our high horse a lot and we're. Talking we talk
about our trips and what we're doing and, whatever and
to each his Own i've done it. Right BUT i
also know like doing the work in the community is.
Important it makes those things THAT i do that are,
positive like talking about a cruise That i've gone, on
it makes it, better right Because i've done the work

(40:10):
in a genuine way in the. Community AND i don't
plan on. Stopping, Right it's not a one time, thing,
well one time. Donation, Right as long AS i KNOW
i can be, Helpful i'm going to be. Helpful it
balances out my. Life SO i encourage you to check

(40:30):
in on your. COMMUNITY i say that a lot on this,
show on my social media. Posts check in on your
people and help where you. Can don't do it for,
clout don't do it for. Likes do it for. Love

(40:51):
lead with. LOVE i promise you if you do it
in that, way good things will come to. You good
things will come to. You community is very, important people very.
Important don't ever lose sight of. That we all need

(41:13):
each other at the end of the. Day all, right
let's get into segment. Three segment. Three what is this?
Called oh, okay, there it is family and personal. Growth let's.
Go derek From, Charleston South carolina Rights, elijah how is
your family shape the man you are? Today how has

(41:37):
family shaped the man THAT i am? TODAY i think
that's a loaded. QUESTION i Think i've seen so much
in my life from that. Perspective i've had to grow up,

(42:01):
Fast i've had to be the man of the house
WHEN i was. Little i've always had aspirations of being
WHERE i am today and being a better. PERSON i
think families played a huge, role a huge, role AND

(42:30):
i think it shaped me from A it shaped me
from a core value life skills point of. View like
my mom was very focused on, responsibility you, know, integrity,

(42:53):
Judgment like she was always honest about doing the right.
Thing and the OLDER i, get the MORE i continue
to understand why she said some of the things she,
said you, know why she did some of the things
that she, did and how it ultimately shaped me to

(43:17):
be the person THAT i. Am, RIGHT i could have
been wild and out in the streets and cutting up
and and and partying all the, time and you, know
she made sure to continue to drill those things into my,
head you, know about being a good, person AND i
think that was that's the foundation of my. Life And

(43:38):
i'm not SAYING i don't make mistakes BECAUSE i, do,
Right i'm. Not you, Know i'm not this perfect guy
by any. MEANS i have a lot of things THAT
i need to get better. At but you, know my
mom laid that. Foundation it's kind of shaped WHO i,
am so a lot of that, credit if not all of,
it goes to. Her, right she really shaped the person

(44:00):
THAT i am. Today minus the hiccups THAT i may
encounter throughout my. LIFE i always, remember like what she,
said you, know and how important the foundation of being
a good person. Is and she's definitely. That SO i

(44:21):
hope that answers your, Question. Derek next question is For
maria In, Augusta. Georgia that's my. Hometown maria, Writes, elijah
what lessons do you try to pass down to your,
niece nephew and younger? Generations to my niece and, NEPHEW
i THINK i just hope that they see a positive

(44:44):
Person whenever they see me online or they like something
THAT i. Do i'm hoping that that's something that they
see and they enjoy same with the younger. GENERATION i
hope that they hope did they see a decent person

(45:09):
who's trying to do as part to change the world
for the. Better that's WHAT i hope they. See you,
know you have to live your, life and you have
to live your life on your. Terms but hopefully as
you're doing, that it's centered around, love, patience. Positivity you,

(45:32):
know you don't get too caught up in the world
that will try to change you consistently every, day.

Speaker 1 (45:41):
You. KNOW i.

Speaker 2 (45:43):
You, know in my, Experiences i'm hoping that people learn
you know, that you, know he really enjoys the. JOURNEY
i Think i'm gonna try. That SO i try to
pass those things like. THAT i try to pass that,
down and you, KNOW i think as long AS i do,
that things will work and someone will be motivated by.

(46:08):
That next question is From james In. Chicago james, writes
as you've grown, older how has your definition of success?
Changed it. Hasn't my success is your. SUCCESS i want
to see you all do. Well seeing people do well

(46:34):
IS i love. It it's fuel like my definition of
success is doing the work without the, applause staying in the,
background watching others. Succeed that's a successful day for. Me

(47:05):
and that's as simple AS i can put. It, like
it's not it's not something that's drawn, out you. KNOW
i think about ways That i'm successful on the, show,

(47:27):
uh AND i pass it, along and you, KNOW i
think when people hear the show or any of my,
shows they share. It i'm successful in a positive, way
in a positive. Way SO i would, Say, james, like

(47:51):
As i've gotten, older it hasn't. Changed mm, hmmm it hasn't.
Changed if you're winning And i've played a, Little i've
had a little part in. That a success to, Me
i've always been that. Way i'm successful WHEN i see
other people obtain things that they worked hard for and

(48:15):
we've been together in that, process makes me feel. Good all.
Right next question segment four comes From tasha In Los, Angeles.
California tasha, Writes, elijah you've spoken about valuing quality friends

(48:38):
over having a bunch of. Friends what does a quality
friend mean to? You? Oh, wow SO i said at
the top of the, show or one of these questions
THAT i, ANSWERED i don't have a lot of. Friends
my circle of friends it's a very very tight, circle very.

(49:02):
TIGHT i could probably count on my hands how many
like close friends and quality friends THAT i. HAVE i
think a quality friend for, me it's someone who's willing to,
listen someone who holds me accountable when they know that

(49:26):
Maybe i'm not making the best. DECISION a quality friend
doesn't mean THAT i have to talk to this friend
every day or text with this friend every. DAY a
quality friend is a quality friend to me is it's

(49:50):
like family Almost AND i KNOW i don't have a
bunch of, them BUT i KNOW i do have true
friends in my. Life and that's the best WAY i
can describe a quality. FRIEND i want you to be

(50:12):
able to be honest with, me hold me accountable when
you when you THINK i may have set something out of,
line or you don't agree with an. Idea be there
when When i'm When i'm down in the, dumbs not
just When i'm. Up if you're going to be there

(50:33):
when When i'm When i'm only having you, know the
highest of, highs and you're not there When i'm, having you,
know a pretty low, MOMENT i don't know IF i
can call you a quality friend OR i would value.
THAT i value you as a quality. Friend So, TASHA
I I i value quality over. Quantity for sure or?

(51:00):
Sure next question is From eric In, Denver Eric, wright
have there been times when you had to let go
of people to keep? Growing? Absolutely here's the. Thing as
you continue to evolve as a, person it happens to
all of, us you eventually shed people who are no

(51:22):
longer meant to be in your. Life. Right it's, like you,
know you move on to that next, chapter and that
person played a role in a previous chapter or at
the beginning of the book or your, life and now
you leveled up or you, evolved and sometimes you shed
those people for a multitude of. Reasons so, Absolutely I've

(51:46):
i'm not going to say that the people That I'VE
i no longer have in my life are not people
THAT i care. About i'll just say AS i AS i,
evolved there's not much time for them. Anymore, Right and

(52:09):
MAYBE i circle back or we circle back to each
other at some point in the journey and we see each.
Other but you definitely shed people you're supposed, to. Right
the people you start with aren't always the people you end.
With And i've definitely been through that AND i continue

(52:34):
to go through. That there are a lot of people
THAT i love and care, about but we've gone in different,
directions and that's not a bad thing. Necessarily. Right they
have goals that they're chasing in one. Direction i'm chasing
my goals in another, direction and sometimes we just don't sync,
up and that's. Okay you have to keep, growing. Right

(52:59):
there are more people throughout your journey that you will,
meet and some will be there in your life for
a long, time some for a short period of, time
and you'll, know you'll. Know next question is From hannah In, Nashville.
Tennessee hannah, Writes, elijah what role do friendships play in

(53:24):
your peace of mind and personal? Growth it's pretty, important you.
Know there are people That i'm really close to that
play a major part in my life and my, growth
listening to their, stories having great. Conversations right, again quality

(53:51):
Friend you have. THOSE i have, those AND i think
we all need that For we need those friends or
some of those friends for our peace of. Mind AND
i do have friends that bring me. Peace but we're

(54:13):
not being, negative we're being. Silly we're being. Positive we're
loving each. OTHER i have a friend like. That Sean
connor is that friend for. Me when we go out
to happy, hour we laugh and, Laugh we are so.

(54:37):
Silly SOMETIMES i feel like we're gonna get kicked out
of this restaurant because we are loud and we're. Laughing
but it feels. Good it's. Peace i'm not talking about.
Work we catch up with family and then we just let.
Loose it's freeing to me be like a, brother and

(55:02):
whenever we get, together he's one of those FRIENDS i
don't have to text every, day but when we, connect
it's like we're instantly, brothers and we make fun at
our own. Expense we people, Watch we have a great,

(55:25):
time and that's part of my piece and. Growth we
all need that. Friend AND i have a few more
friends who are like that as. Well BUT i think
that's the role that he plays in my life and
may be a couple of. Others. ALSO i have a book,

(55:45):
club amazing book club, friends and we talk about a
lot of things right that will stay with. ME i
won't reveal them the, show but we laugh at my,
expense at their. Expense that's my piece And i'll do

(56:10):
anything to protect. It you should as. Well All, right
that was a quick, segment. Folks we are whizzing through these.
Segments we have two more to go before we. Close the.
Show AS i said at the, top you know we're
going to run long and we Have i'm enjoying answering these.
QUESTIONS i hope that you are enjoying the answers as.

(56:32):
Well this next segment is segment, five and we're going
to talk a bit about my role as a para
professional my children's. Books so let's get into. It this
question is From malik In. Baltimore malik, writes as a
children's book, author where do you find inspiration for your?
Stories that's an easy, Question. Elik my childhood and you,

(56:58):
know As i've gotten, OLDER i love people WATCHING i.
Do and you, KNOW I i my mind is a
very creative. MIND i don't know if that's a it's
a it's a great thing or it's a bad. Thing
BUT i think about my childhood a lot and a

(57:18):
lot of the stories THAT i went through and and
a lot of the stories and things That i've. Seen
it helps in the writing. Process AND i have so much,
Material that's the. Thing there's so many things That i've
experienced in my life THAT i CAN i can turn
into a. Book you you wouldn't, Believe BUT i like
going this route with children's. Books BECAUSE i do, think you,

(57:45):
know there are stories to tell in a way that
will help kids in this generation learn more about, respect,
responsibility and honesty and judge and. Integrity SO i love
writing from that. Perspective it's not to SAY i won't

(58:06):
do an adult, book you, Know I'm i'm thinking about
that or a chapter. BOOK i have a good friend of,
MINE i kind of ran that by, her AND i
don't know if she WAS i don't know if she
took me serious or. Not but there are a lot
of THINGS i think about from my childhood that gives me. Inspiration,

(58:29):
RIGHT i have so much, material so. Much next question
is From olivia In. Portland olivia, Writes, elijah how do
your books reflect your values and lessons you want kids
to carry with? Them, again you, KNOW i try to
write from a life skills. Perspective you, Know i'm big

(58:55):
on core values and and and building that. Foundation you,
know it's it's WHO i am as a, person OR
i try to be as a, person and SO i
want the books to reflect, that AND i think for
the most part they, have.

Speaker 1 (59:13):
You.

Speaker 2 (59:13):
Know So i'm grateful that the books have been received really.
Well and you, KNOW i just finished writing my fifth
book that will be out In. January right, now we're
going through the process of finding a new illustrator and
we're very close on, that and then that production part
of the book will we'll get started and you, know

(59:36):
hopefully the book will be finished by Maybe November, december
and we'll start promoting the, book you, know around that,
time and it'll be it'll be, fun it'll be. Exciting
but you, KNOW I i want every book to reflect

(01:00:01):
core values and life skills because that's HOW i grew.
Up next question is From jaden In, Miami. Florida jaden, Writes,
elijah what message do you hope, readers both children and
parents take away from your. WORK i hope that the

(01:00:25):
message that they take away is, that you, KNOW i
hope that they talk to their kids about core. Values
that's the. MESSAGE i hope that, they you, know relate
to their kids it's okay to make a mistake and
learn from. IT i hope they see the fun in the.

(01:00:49):
Characters that's a takeaway from. Me you, know if they do,
that then then it's all worth. It it's been all worth.
It next question is From sharon And Saint, Louis. Missouri
sharon rights what is being a para professional taught you about,

(01:01:13):
patience growth and. Leadership, well great, Question. Sharon patience is
definitely the key in that. Department i've still this is
my fourth, year And i've tried very hard to be
or learn more about myself from a patient's point of.

(01:01:34):
VIEW i don't have all the. Answers there's a GREAT
i have a great team of para professionals and special
education teachers THAT i listen to AND i try to
help every, day and they help me. Tremendously you. KNOW

(01:01:54):
i think being a para professional it's definitely taught me
that at times my way of doing things or answering
question isn't always the way. Right i've had to be

(01:02:17):
really patient in that department because sometimes WHEN i don't
have the, ANSWERS i revert back to an advocate to
try to. Help And i'm not saying that that's, bad
because it's. Not BUT i try to lean, on you,
know my teammates more for those. ANSWERS i try to
watch and imitate what they're doing right as opposed to

(01:02:40):
just going into advocate, mode because that's not always the
best thing. Sometimes So i've learned about. That it's taught
me about. That from a growth, standpoint, AGAIN i think
as a, person AS i continue to, evolve it's taught
me THAT i don't know everything there is to know

(01:03:03):
about being. Anything i'm constantly. Learning that's what this role
is taught. Me every day is. Different it looks the,
same it may feel the, same but it's a little
difference in each day and the. Leaderships you, know from

(01:03:24):
a leadership, STANDPOINT i would, Say i've always felt Like
i've been a leader. Always sometimes it's by my, actions
sometimes it's about the words THAT i use or may
say to. People But i've always felt, like you, Know
i've been a leader in anything THAT i. DO i

(01:03:46):
don't have to be out front to be the leader
THAT i. Do. KNOW i think this has been probably
one of the best decisions That i've, made thanks to
a couple of friends who have opened doors for me
to be in the elementary. SCHOOL i THINK i really

(01:04:13):
know more about being, patient AND i really mean that
because there's days where you really have to use that
as a. Superpower it is a superpower being, patient And
i'm getting stronger and stronger in that. Department so that's

(01:04:37):
those are some of the things that being a pay
professionals taught me, like you've got to have. Patience you
gotta be willing to, grow and eventually you develop your
leadership skill set or it gets sharper and you REALIZE
i don't need to be at the. FOREFRONT i can

(01:04:58):
stay behind the. Scenes i've always known, that as even
as a, KID i don't have to be out front
with the bullhorn being the. Leader SOMETIMES i can pull
back and give someone else the, reins OR i can
listen to a critique or something THAT i need to
be better.

Speaker 1 (01:05:16):
At.

Speaker 2 (01:05:17):
Right that's a sign of a good leader to rely
on my teammates to be honest and open with. Me
So i've learned a lot and it's only been four.
Years now WILL i continue to do? THIS i, HONESTLY
i don't. KNOW i don't, know BUT i would encourage
you all to stay, Tuned stay. Tuned next question is

(01:05:43):
From robert And. Boston Robert wrights on the golf. Course
what life lessons do you try to teach your students
beyond the. Game you try to get them ready for? Life, right,
Yeahs i'm giving. Lessons i'm talking about in life, skills core.
Values you try to prepare them for the world because

(01:06:06):
sometimes golf doesn't always work. Out golf is a hard.
Sport it's a hard. Sport you gotta be really, good
and you got to. Shoot you got to score consistent
low numbers in order to be really. Competitive you really. Do,

(01:06:30):
SO i As i'm teaching to some some family friends
and some students That i've worked, with you try to
talk about. Life what are your, goals what are your
long term. Goals what do you see yourself in a
couple of. Years how CAN i help you get? There
what's my role in your? Journey because golf isn't always

(01:06:54):
going to be the end all be. All And i'm
not saying you should focus on a PLAN. B i
think if PLAN a is the, plan you should follow PLAN.
A you shouldn't spend a lot of time on PLAN.
B AND i think that's the mistake THAT i tell
golfers or players not to. Make don't rely so much

(01:07:15):
on a PLAN, b because then you take a lot
of that focus off of PLAN a when PLAN a
is what you really. Want we know there's a PLAN,
b but spend all your time focusing on PLAN. A
so we talk, about you, know those kind of things
in ways THAT i can help in that. Department next

(01:07:40):
question is From kendra And, Philadelphia Kendra. Rights is there
a moment as a coach or teacher that stands out
as a reminder of why you do what you? Do?
NO I i get asked this a. Lot, no there
isn't like one. Moment there's a multitude of moments stand
out to, me too many to really go. INTO i

(01:08:06):
enjoyed my time with each. STUDENT i enjoyed my time
with each uh. Golfer i'm learning about, Them i'm learning about.
Myself so there there's there's a multitude of moments as
a coach and a para professional that that stand. Out
and you know when when you've had, success because you

(01:08:29):
see it and you feel it and it feels good
and and and and it's just too many to really
talk about. Today Maybe i'll get into that down the, Road.
Kendra but there they're. Not there isn't just one moment
THAT i WOULD i could, share because THEN i feel
Like i'm doing a disservice to maybe another moment That

(01:08:50):
i'm not thinking about currently that was probably as big
as that, Moment and THEN i have to continue on
that Because i've had so many moments in my life
that that have been impactful to both me and the
people THAT i am interacting. With so maybe another, Show
I'll i'll get to. That all, Right we're at our final,

(01:09:14):
segment segment, six. Folks we are on the back end
of the, show and you know this segment is the big,
why the big why we do the things we do
OR i do the things THAT i. Do this question
comes From david In, houston and he, asked why do

(01:09:36):
you care so deeply about lifting others? Up BECAUSE i
it's a great. QUESTION i think we all have it in.
US i love doing. IT i love doing. IT i

(01:09:56):
love seeing people. Smile i'm not A i'm not a
goodie two. Shoes i've been somebody told me that a
couple of weeks. Ago you're a goody two. Shoes, No
i'm not a goody two. SHOES i promise. You i'm
not a goody two. Shoes BUT i just care about.
PEOPLE i really. DO i LOVE i love people really.

(01:10:19):
Hard sometimes that's a great. Thing sometimes that's not a good.
Thing but it's me and you, Know i'm not going
to change that aspect of my life for. ANYBODY i
was raised that, way SO i care about people's. FEELINGS
i don't. KNOW i WISH i could pinpoint it and

(01:10:42):
tell you more about that and WHY i feel that,
way BUT i just. DO i love very deeply AND
i want to see us all. Win and IF i
can help you simply that putting a smile on your.
FACE i try to do, that BUT i know y'all
have it in, us and SO i just try to
bring it out and it makes me feel, good it.

(01:11:05):
Does it gives me join WHEN i can do. That
next question is from The cold In San, Diego. California
the cole, writes when you look in the mirror, today
who do you? See compare it to five or ten years? Ago?

(01:11:26):
Ay y, yeah. Yai, TODAY i see a person who's
continuing to. Evolve he's willing to learn and. Grow that's
WHAT i see WHEN i look in the. MIRROR i

(01:11:47):
see a person that's not afraid to have an honest
conversation about himself as to where he's, going what he's
trying to, achieve why is it so? Important and you,
know developing that good better house about. Himself that's WHAT i.

(01:12:07):
See WHEN i look in the. MIRROR i see an imperfect,
person loving, people, caring for people five or ten years,
ago i'd see the same, thing. RIGHT i just don't
know IF i, think if, Anything i've gotten better with

(01:12:34):
not pleasing, everybody because you. Can't so five or ten years,
AGO i may have been that person who's trying to
do everything for, everybody and you just you can't live like.
That you'll crash and burn. Quickly AND i found that.
Out so now you, Know i'm doing the things that

(01:12:55):
bring me the most, joy that bring me the most,
peace and Then i'm able to pivot and spend more
quality time with myself and with my. Family, right SO
i do these check ins on. Myself so the PERSON
i see today, again he's a decent dude who's still,

(01:13:16):
learning still, growing and you know he's willing to take the,
risk even if he's by. Himself all, right let's take
one more question From anthony In New, Orleans. LOUISIANA i
always wanted to go. THERE i want to go To

(01:13:37):
Bourbon street one. Time anthony. Rights if someone asks What's elijah's,
purpose what would your answer? Be my purpose is simple
to make someone or something. Better that's. It that's What

(01:14:02):
i'm here to, do and in, turn it makes me
a better. Person so that's HOW i would answer that, short,
simple sweet to make someone or something. Better IF i do,

(01:14:23):
That i'm. Happy. Listen all these questions today remind me,
that you, know purpose isn't about titles or. Accomplishments it really, isn't.
Folks it's all about. Impact it's about who you become

(01:14:48):
and who you lift up along the. Way who are
you taking with you in your? Journey and how have
you made things better for others in your? Community what
are you doing today to make someone or something. Better

(01:15:11):
i'm still, Growing i'm still, learning but my why has
always been. Clear i've always wanted to. Serve i've always
wanted to inspire and leave the world a little better
THAN i found. It, right those are the THINGS i

(01:15:37):
think about. Daily how CAN i be of? Assistance how
CAN i be of? Service and those who follow, me
whether you're in the community or you see me on social,
media you see, it AND i hope that you feel.

(01:15:57):
IT i hope that it inspires. You that's the. Goal
i'm not competing with anyone, ELSE i promise You i'm.
Not i'm just doing the, work putting it out and
whatever happens at that point. Happens it's the person THAT

(01:16:21):
i continue to become every single. Day SO i want
to thank all of you from across the country for
sending in your. Questions really appreciate. It this, conversation you,
know it just reminded me how connected we are on
this show, right your, support your emails like they mean

(01:16:46):
so much to. Me you all take the time out
of your day to send these questions in and to
listen to the. Show if today's episode spoke to, you
share it with someone who might need it. Right continue

(01:17:06):
to leave with. Kindness it's important that we spread it like.
CONFETTI i like that, saying spread kindness around like. Confetti
keep pushing forward and keep making peace with the. Mirror
that's what it's all. About it starts with. You remember
that it starts with. You always remember that we've come

(01:17:34):
to the end of The Elijah Winfrey. Show as, always
thank you for the, Downloads thank you for the live
listeners today and each week THAT i host the. Show
shout out to my amazing, Producer Greg. Nice do me
a favor this. Week, folks get out in your communities
and check in on your family and. Friends put a

(01:17:58):
smile on someone's. FACE. Khm remember it doesn't take a
lot of energy to do that at. All thank you
for listening to The Elijah Winfrey. Show please be sure
to download this show wherever you download your favorite. Podcast
soil next. Week take, Care god bless