October 2, 2023 • 27 mins
In this episode, Kristi shares 6 key ways to make big things happen and how to continue moving toward your goals while having fun in the process. Discover helpful mindset shifts and tips for avoiding burnout while enjoying the process of making things happen! Plus, a small, actionable habit you can create that can bring a boost of joy.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:03):
Welcome to the Joy School podcast,real talk about what it takes to create
your happiest, healthiest and most dynamiclife. And now here's your host,
transformational life coach, happiness strategist andbest selling author, Christy ling Spencer.
Well, hey, there are myfriends, and welcome back to another episode
(00:24):
of the show. I am sohappy that you've chosen to hang out with
me once again. Thank you somuch for being here. And if this
is your first time listening to theshow, welcome, And this is going
to be such a fun episode becausewe're going to be talking about six of
the core ways to make big thingshappen, six ways that you can become
(00:46):
a make it happen person, asI like to call it. So you
know those people who just seem tohave great luck and they make things happen,
and they have great achievements, andthey set goals and they make them
happen. There's foundational elements that playa part in that. And maybe you
already consider yourself a make it happenperson. I know I do generally,
(01:10):
but we can all step it upand really hone in on the foundational elements
that can support us and actually reallytaking charge and making our dreams and goals
happen, and moving that needle forwardand really getting to know what those foundational
elements are that will support you inthose areas can be truly life changing.
(01:30):
If you're already a make it happenperson, this can help you level it
up or get clear on what yournext goal is. Right and if you
feel like you've been a little bitmore passive, that your personality and your
nature is a little more passive,and if something is seems too hard or
too far away that you generally letit go, but you'd like to not
(01:53):
be that way, that you'd maybelike to stretch yourself a little bit,
This is definitely the episode for you. So I remember when I first was
writing the proposal for my book,Operation Happiness. I can't tell you how
many people I had tell me thatwere in the industry, in coaching or
in publishing and personal development world tellingme, oh, a book about happiness.
(02:17):
You know, people aren't going tobuy that, or you're not going
to be able to get a bookdeal because it's just too general and too
broad. And I was like,well, it's a broad subject, but
nobody has said it the way I'msaying it, I have new things to
say here, like I knew,and I just believed that that book could
help a lot of people. SoI bypassed the naysayers, and I refused
(02:40):
the suggestions from various people to changethe title, to change the subject,
to change the direction of what itwas that I felt called to share with
the world. And my belief inthat and my knowing that I wanted to
move it forward and that it wasa priority for me, and then taking
action to do that led not onlyto a fantastic agent and a fantastic book
(03:06):
deal, but now selling out ofthe hard copies and helping thousands and thousands
of people over this last few yearssince the book came out. And that's
really such an example. First ofall, I'm so grateful for it.
I am so grateful to all ofyou who might have already read the book.
And if you don't have a copyyet, it is Operation Happiness.
There's actually an audiobook which is doingreally well. I think audiobooks are like
(03:30):
the thing now, huh. Ilove audiobooks too, actually, I'm but
I also love a paper book.I'm not much of a kindle person because
when I want to break from adevice. I actually want to hold a
paper book in my hand and maybebe in a park or relaxing in my
house somewhere. But that's a wholeother episode getting off of screens, right.
But so back to the creation ofOperation Happiness. I had to do
(03:53):
a lot of the six things thatwe're going to talk about on the show
today to make that book a realityand one that we're not really going to
talk about so much, but alsoreally could be. The seventh thing was
that I believed in it. Because, as I like to always say,
before you can really dive into makinganything happen, you have to believe in
it with all of your being.And I believed in that book. So
(04:15):
I didn't listen. I followed thesesix things and I made it happen,
and as a result, it's beenable to help so many people. So
I'm so grateful for that. Thankyou to all of you who have read
it or are planning to read it. I really do believe in it,
and actually I am working on apaperback edition of that book now, so
really excited for that, and Iwill keep you all posted. But with
(04:35):
that little story there, when youhave a dream or a goal that you
really believe in. These six thingscan really help you, and they can
also help you in general in yourlife, in making even the smallest things
happen that you desire that are inalignment with where you want a head.
Right, So let's dive in.So Number one is be willing to try
(04:58):
things on for side. Now,you've probably heard that saying before try it
on for size. Well, didyou know you can actually try goals on
for size. You can try dreamsand desires on for size. Most things
are not a permanent commitment, Soif you dream of moving to a new
city, try arranging things so thatyou can grab a rental there for one
(05:20):
month, a short term rental,and try it out. Bring a couple
of suitcases with you and just seewhat it's like to live as a local.
You don't have to do the bigmove and commit to something that big
to try it on for size.Or if you dream of starting a business
or getting into a new field,try volunteering or interning for a day at
(05:40):
a company that's aligned with that area, right with the area you're interested in
getting into. You don't have toquit what you're doing now and go find
a new job or launch that businessright away. If you're feeling uneasy about
it, try it on for size, dip your toes in. Or if
you're thinking about taking a big tripbut you're trying to get the courage to
(06:01):
book it, and maybe you aregoing to travel alone or your spouse,
it doesn't really you know, getexcited about the idea. Try going to
a local cafe that represents where you'dlike to travel and just immerse yourself for
an hour or so in the feelingof being there. Right. There are
so many great cafes that have differentthemes. There's a wonderful Parisian cafe near
(06:24):
where I live, and I lovejust going there and sitting and maybe having
a glass of wine and a salador a piece of keiche and just enjoying
immersing myself and being in that environmentthat represents the feeling of being in Paris.
Right, So try things on forsize. It's a really great way
to build the courage to take thatnext step. And it's also a great
(06:46):
way to see if maybe something reallyisn't a fit for you after all,
right, Because sometimes we dream ofsomething, or we have a goal,
or we think we want to dosomething, but actually when we try it
out, it's not really a fitfor who we are, or it loses
its luster when we find out someof the details on it that we didn't
know about before. Right, Sothink out of the box of ways that
(07:06):
you can try things on for sizeall Right. Number two, be willing
to commit to moving the needle everysingle day, no matter how small.
This is a mindful practice. Whenyou have a goal in your life that
you're trying to reach, you havesomething you're trying to launch, you have
a new habit you're trying to createpersonally, maybe it's in alignment with your
(07:30):
health or another area of your lifethat you'd like to improve or grow.
Be willing to commit every single dayto doing at least one thing or more
to move things forward in the rightdirection. Even the smallest steps that move
the needle make a difference. Theyall matter. And here's the thing.
None of us is totally on ourgame every single day. We all have
(07:55):
our off days. Even make ithappen. People have days when they do
don't even feel like doing anything.I mean there's days when I wake up
and I'm like, I just can'ttoday, I just can't. Right,
we all have those days. Buthere's the thing. The difference between the
people that make things happen and theones that are just passive that don't really
(08:16):
seem to reach where they want togo, is that the people who are
make it happen people, even ontheir off days, they do one little
thing to move things forward. Theysend that one email, they make that
one call, they do one thingto move the dream forward. And they
also have an inner knowing that it'spart of the human experience to have off
(08:39):
days now and then, and sometimesa day of rest is exactly what we
need to really have great days movingthings forward, right, to get our
energy back. So that's really whatthat's about, is managing those days and
make it happen. People have theinner knowing that they're going to have plenty
of good days when they can reallydive in and move things ahead, right,
(09:01):
So honor your off days, honorthat energy. Don't beat yourself up,
because that will just result in burnout. And also it could really result
in artificially losing interest in your dream. Right. When we burn ourselves out
on something, even if we're passionateabout it, even if we love it,
it can lose its luster for awhile and throw us off track.
(09:22):
So allow yourself an off day nowand then, but be willing to commit
to moving the needle every single day, even in the smallest way. This
is the difference, my friends.All right, number three, Be willing
to fail. It's totally okay ifyou fall on your face. I have
done it plenty of times, believeme. And actually, back to the
(09:46):
story of my book, right,Operation Happiness. The first version of that
book, I actually wrote the proposalfor it about two years before I rewrote
it and created the final for OperationHappiness. And the original version of the
book was called Happiness is Free,I think, And there's a really really
(10:07):
old book written many many years agowith that same title, so that was
a temporary title, but I didn'teven have the title yet. And the
first version of the proposal I hadwritten for a contest which I didn't win.
And I didn't let that failure stopme from moving forward when the time
was right with really having that bookdevelop into all it was meant to be,
(10:31):
right, I didn't let it stopme. So be willing to fail
and know that failure is actually partof success. It really is. The
most successful people in the world havefailed many many many times, and they
have gotten back up and not letit discourage them, and not let it
have them lose faith in who theyare and what they believe in. And
(10:54):
the most successful people have been toldno more times than they can count.
Believe me, I've been told noso many times in my life, and
I really just believe it's a redirectionto the right thing. Sometimes a rejection
is a redirection, right, Youmight have heard that before. So here's
the thing. Also, failure manytimes is just pointing us to the next
(11:18):
right step. So maybe it wasonly that most recent step we took that
kind of messed things up, right, or maybe it was only one element
in the steps you were taking.And so a failure can just mean hey,
take another look and see if there'sa different way to do this.
And it also means you tried.If you fail, it means that you're
(11:39):
already embodying the nature of a makeit happen person. Right, So don't
be afraid. Failure is actually agood thing ninety eight percent of the time,
and even that two percent when it'snot so great, we still learn
from it and grow and maybe it'llbe the catalyst for us to try what
we're really meant for right all right? Number four, This is a big
(12:00):
one, and it might be thehardest of all. Be willing to disappoint
people. Oh, this one isso tough, especially if you have a
people pleasing nature like I do.I've had to work really hard over the
years on not being such a peoplepleaser. It's not necessarily healthful, and
it doesn't necessarily help move us towardour goals and our dreams, and it
(12:22):
certainly doesn't support our own self careand prioritizing what we desire in our life.
So there's a big difference between wantingto please people in a good way,
in a healthy way and make peoplehappy or be kind or do things
to support our loved ones and ourfriends and people in our life. Right
(12:43):
between that and actually being a chronicpeople pleaser, where we sacrifice things that
we want, sacrifice our own wellbeing or our own mental or emotional fitness
for the sake of pleasing others.There's a big difference in those two things.
So we have to be willing todisappoint people when we are so sure
(13:03):
about where we want to go andwhat our dreams are and what we want
to make happen, because the thingis, not everyone is going to like
it or agree. People you lovein your life are sometimes the first one
to tell you, oh, that'snot a great idea, or I don't
really see you doing that, Andit doesn't mean they don't love you,
and it doesn't even mean they don'tsupport you. You're just going to have
(13:24):
naysayers no matter what, or there'sgoing to be people who just don't agree
with what you're doing, or whodon't think it's the right fit, or
who might think it's too risky.Right, they care about you enough and
they love you they don't want tosee you take a risk. But the
thing is you've got to take risksto move the needle in life, and
sometimes when you do that, you'regoing to disappoint some people. And you
(13:46):
also have to prioritize saying no tosome things when you align yourself with prioritizing
your goals, because when you alignyourself with prioritizing your own dreams and goals
and desires, there will be alot of things that try to get in
your way, or maybe previous commitmentsthat you've made that you need to dissolve
(14:07):
and gracefully bow out of in orderto be able to prioritize and have that
energy and have the mindset to goafter what it is you want. So
be willing to gracefully and lovingly disappointpeople, all right. Number five,
I love this one. Nurture yourconfidence in your abilities. Now, this
(14:28):
really comes down to taking part inpractices and mindsets and even programs that help
to nurture your self confidence, yourself esteem, your self worth, and
your inner knowing in your capabilities tomake things happen. You're deep knowing that
you're always going to land on yourfeet no matter what. It takes practice,
(14:50):
and it takes work to really solidifyand develop this type of confidence and
this type of belief in yourself.I've had to work so hard on it,
and every now and then I feelmyself sort of getting out of alignment
and falling off the wagon here alittle bit. And I always circle back
to the mindset work and the personalgrowth work that really helps to support developing
(15:15):
self confidence and belief in ourselves andself worth, that inner knowing when you
have that kind of confidence and youknow that you'll always land on your feet
and that you'll be okay no matterwhat This is a foundational thing, and
it will really support you when you'reready to step forward into making something happen,
because you know you're good and you'vegot confidence, and you're like,
(15:39):
I've got this right. So whatI want you to do right now is
I'm going to give you a secondor two to do it. I want
you wherever you are right now,and if you're in your office with other
people or something, you can whisperit, but I want you to audibly
say the words I've got this.Are you ready, Let's go, I've
got this, You've got this right. It feels good just to speak those
(16:02):
words. And the words we speakto ourselves, by the way, make
a big difference in nurturing our confidenceand our self worth and our self esteem
right, So be careful about thewords you speak to yourself and work on
adding some words to your vocabulary thatfeels supportive, some affirmations that feel like
they build you up right, andwork those in and try to use them
(16:25):
on a frequent basis. That's agreat place to start when you want to
grow and nurture your confidence and yourconfidence in your own abilities. Because make
it happen. People are always veryconfident in their own ability. They're confident
enough that they're actually willing to dothings when they're afraid, even though they're
(16:45):
afraid. Because sometimes when you've gota big goal or a big dream,
it's going to be a little scary, right, And there is actually such
a thing of being fearful of success. And when you nurture your confidence and
your belief in your abilities, ithelps you to be able to take that
first step and move things forward,even when you are a little nervous about
(17:07):
it, even when you might beafraid of the big thing happening that you're
dreaming of. Right. And whenyou do this, when you do this
work, and when you truly cultivatea solid belief in yourself and in your
abilities, you become unstoppable, allright. So that brings us to number
six. This is a really goodone. And actually I would have to
(17:30):
say, out of all of these, this might be the one that helped
me completely change and transform my lifeinto all that it is today and all
that it will be in the future. Because I'm not done, my friends,
I'm just getting started. And maybeyou feel that way too. I
think in many ways we are alljust getting started and It has nothing to
do with age. I know peoplein their eighties who have started new businesses.
(17:53):
I think it's so fantastic. Infact, I just saw something on
Instagram the other day at a couplewho was like ninety one and they were
getting married, and I just thoughtit was the sweetest thing. It's all
how you see things and we're alljust getting started. So with that being
said, number six is be willingto invest in yourself. You are your
(18:19):
own best investment, and you arethe only investment you can make where you
actually have some control over the results. Right. Because you're investing in yourself,
you're not relying on some external factorto do a certain thing before you
see a return on your investment.I love this quote from Warren Buffett.
(18:40):
He says, the best investment youcan make is in yourself. The more
you learn, the more you earn. And I love that so much because
it is so true. A lotof people are hesitant to invest in themselves
and enroll in programs in their ownpersonal or professional development and growth because they're
like, oh, well, Idon't want to spend that money. It
comes from a place of lack,and believe me, I've been there.
(19:03):
Before. But when you actually realizethat your best investment is in you,
nobody can ever take away from youthe growth and the things that you learn
when you invest in yourself and youget into some programs or you know,
a gym membership is a great example, any type of a program that grows
you and supports your mental, physical, and professional health and well being.
(19:27):
Right is investing in you and investingin your own dreams and personal development can
pay off big in so many ways. As mister Buffett says, the more
you learn, the more you earn. There also is some research that shows
that people who invest in their ownpersonal development and professional development and of course
(19:49):
your well being, that they actuallysee an increase in revenue in their business
or an increase in their salary overtime because their performance in increases and their
positive energy increases, and their abilityto make things happen right, which is
the topic of our show today,increases. It's such a big one.
(20:11):
So with that, I also haveto mention that the Joy School, which
is my new monthly membership program,is getting ready to open. It is
so close and I can't tell youhow incredible this program is going to be.
Amazingly supportive like a gym membership forthe soul and for accomplishing your dreams
(20:32):
and for your own self care andcreating your best life and becoming the best
version of you. When I neededsomething like this, I couldn't find anything
out there like it. This isliterally my dream program, and I'm so
excited to share more about it whenit launches with you all. But if
you're intrigued by this by creating thiskind of a support and community in your
(20:55):
life and having access to so manyincredible tools and a whole library of coaching
and mindset concepts and best life creationclasses and inspiration sheets and all kinds of
good stuff, jump over to jointhe joyschool dot com where you can read
more about it and jump on theVIP wait list. There. You'll also
(21:18):
get a free gift when you dothat, but that way you'll be the
first to know when the door's open, because it is happening very soon,
my friends, and I could notbe more excited to offer this all to
you in a super dynamic and incrediblyaffordable way, Like coaching is probably the
thing that's made the biggest difference inmy life, and this program is going
(21:41):
to be so dynamic and so accessible, and that was my dream. Really.
I remember back when I was lookingfor things to support me, I
would find programs that were tens ofthousands of dollars and I was like,
I just am not It's not thatI don't want to, I'm just not
in a place for that right now. And so a lot of the work
that I did in my life,it took me a lot longer than it
(22:03):
would have if I had been insome kind of a program, and it
did end up costing me a lotmore money because instead of investing in one
big program, I invested over theyears in numerous smaller ones. But I
have to tell you it's been greatfor me. And it's also put me
in the position to take the bestof the best of the best of everything
that I've learned, along with allthe coaching that I've developed those skills,
(22:25):
and put it all into one placeto save everybody money and time and pain
and struggle, right And that wasreally my goal. So jump over to
join the joyschool dot com because Iam just so excited to welcome anybody who
this resonates with inside that community whenwe launch, all right with that,
it brings me to the part ofthe show called the Joyschool Habits, and
(22:51):
this is where I share a littlechallenge or a little habit that is a
little bit of effort that can alsohave big impact. I love things the
great return on investment that don't takea lot of effort that can create big
results. And that's what this segmentis all about. And this one this
week is kind of a fun one, and that is take a little bit
(23:11):
of time to be mindful about levelingup your drink wear. So this sounds
totally random, but it is somuch fun. So there's actually studies being
done on how the shape of ourglassware can affect how much we drink,
what we drink, how we thinkabout what we're drinking. And if you're
(23:33):
drinking out of the same mundane glassesall the time, you might want to
think about leveling it up. It'llhelp you stay hydrated, it can bring
you joy, right, I mean, who doesn't love to drink out of
a fancy goblet or a beautiful wineglass, even if you don't drink.
Now, I want to share,and I believe I've noted this before,
that I've drastically cut down on alcoholin my life. This past year.
(23:56):
And one of the things I've donethat was really helpful with that was I
started still allowing myself to enjoy sippingout of a beautiful wineglass. I have
beautiful crystal wine glasses that I justlove. But I'll drink like a little
bit of grapefruit juice with some sparklingwater. Or I will make like a
virgin mimosa with a splash of ojand some sparkling water and a slice of
(24:18):
orange and a little slice of rosemary. Right, make like a fancy mocktail.
Or I'll just drink my morning juiceout of a beautiful glass, right,
or a fancy goblet. And weall know, most of us who
are coffee drinkers, we have afavorite coffee mug. Right. There are
psychological reasons for this, and soit could be really fun to really take
(24:41):
note of your drink wear. Whatare you drinking out of? What are
you reaching for first? Right?I don't know about you, but for
me in the morning, when Igo to make my coffee, if my
favorite coffee mugs are dirty and inthe dishwasher, I'm kind of bummed out.
And then I'm like, well,I guess I'll drink out of this
one today. It really does makea difference. This is a small thing
that when you shifted a bit,can bring a little bit of joy to
(25:03):
your life, and as I mentioned, also help you stay hydrated. Find
healthy beverages that are low in sugarand hydrating and fill beautiful glasses with them
and enjoy them throughout the day andevening. All right. Oh, the
other thing too, I was goingto mention a friend of mine has this
gorgeous glass water bottle that actually hascrystals in the bottom. I believe they're
(25:26):
amethyst, and they charge the waterwith positive energy and the energy of abundance.
And I love that idea. Andyou can even google online drinking water
with crystals and how to use crystalswith drinking water and different things, and
if that appeals to you, thereare ways to do that as well.
But really it's all about what makesyou feel good. So that's the Joyschool
(25:48):
habit for this week. Take alittle bit of an inventory of your drink
wear, notice mindfully what your favoritesare, and work on drinking out of
those more often. See just alittle bit of extra joy and hydration that
brings to your life. All right, Friends, if you enjoyed this episode.
I would be so grateful if youwould hop over and leave a review
(26:11):
on Apple Podcasts or on your favoriteplatform. This truly helps the show and
it helps it reach more people whomight also enjoy it, and I read
them all. Please share with yourfriends on social media and be sure to
connect with me on social media.I'm on Facebook and Instagram quite a bit
and I love connecting with you there. I'm very involved in those communities.
And you can visit my website atChristylinkspencer dot com where you can download some
(26:34):
free gifts and there's some great articlesthere for you and other resources. And
you can also find the link toget on the VIP waitlist for the doors
opening of the Joy School coming up. I am sending you so much love.
I hope you enjoyed this episode anduntil next time, remember you've got
what it takes to create more amazingdays, and more amazing days make up
(26:59):
a pretty amazing life. So goout there and be the make it happen
person that you are at your core. Have a fantastic week, my beautiful
friends, and I will see yousoon
Welcome to the Joy School podcast,real talk about what it takes to create
your happiest, healthiest and most dynamiclife. And now here's your host,
transformational life coach, happiness strategist andbest selling author, Christy ling Spencer.
Well, hey, there are myfriends, and welcome back to another episode
(00:24):
of the show. I am sohappy that you've chosen to hang out with
me once again. Thank you somuch for being here. And if this
is your first time listening to theshow, welcome, And this is going
to be such a fun episode becausewe're going to be talking about six of
the core ways to make big thingshappen, six ways that you can become
(00:46):
a make it happen person, asI like to call it. So you
know those people who just seem tohave great luck and they make things happen,
and they have great achievements, andthey set goals and they make them
happen. There's foundational elements that playa part in that. And maybe you
already consider yourself a make it happenperson. I know I do generally,
(01:10):
but we can all step it upand really hone in on the foundational elements
that can support us and actually reallytaking charge and making our dreams and goals
happen, and moving that needle forwardand really getting to know what those foundational
elements are that will support you inthose areas can be truly life changing.
(01:30):
If you're already a make it happenperson, this can help you level it
up or get clear on what yournext goal is. Right and if you
feel like you've been a little bitmore passive, that your personality and your
nature is a little more passive,and if something is seems too hard or
too far away that you generally letit go, but you'd like to not
(01:53):
be that way, that you'd maybelike to stretch yourself a little bit,
This is definitely the episode for you. So I remember when I first was
writing the proposal for my book,Operation Happiness. I can't tell you how
many people I had tell me thatwere in the industry, in coaching or
in publishing and personal development world tellingme, oh, a book about happiness.
(02:17):
You know, people aren't going tobuy that, or you're not going
to be able to get a bookdeal because it's just too general and too
broad. And I was like,well, it's a broad subject, but
nobody has said it the way I'msaying it, I have new things to
say here, like I knew,and I just believed that that book could
help a lot of people. SoI bypassed the naysayers, and I refused
(02:40):
the suggestions from various people to changethe title, to change the subject,
to change the direction of what itwas that I felt called to share with
the world. And my belief inthat and my knowing that I wanted to
move it forward and that it wasa priority for me, and then taking
action to do that led not onlyto a fantastic agent and a fantastic book
(03:06):
deal, but now selling out ofthe hard copies and helping thousands and thousands
of people over this last few yearssince the book came out. And that's
really such an example. First ofall, I'm so grateful for it.
I am so grateful to all ofyou who might have already read the book.
And if you don't have a copyyet, it is Operation Happiness.
There's actually an audiobook which is doingreally well. I think audiobooks are like
(03:30):
the thing now, huh. Ilove audiobooks too, actually, I'm but
I also love a paper book.I'm not much of a kindle person because
when I want to break from adevice. I actually want to hold a
paper book in my hand and maybebe in a park or relaxing in my
house somewhere. But that's a wholeother episode getting off of screens, right.
But so back to the creation ofOperation Happiness. I had to do
(03:53):
a lot of the six things thatwe're going to talk about on the show
today to make that book a realityand one that we're not really going to
talk about so much, but alsoreally could be. The seventh thing was
that I believed in it. Because, as I like to always say,
before you can really dive into makinganything happen, you have to believe in
it with all of your being.And I believed in that book. So
(04:15):
I didn't listen. I followed thesesix things and I made it happen,
and as a result, it's beenable to help so many people. So
I'm so grateful for that. Thankyou to all of you who have read
it or are planning to read it. I really do believe in it,
and actually I am working on apaperback edition of that book now, so
really excited for that, and Iwill keep you all posted. But with
(04:35):
that little story there, when youhave a dream or a goal that you
really believe in. These six thingscan really help you, and they can
also help you in general in yourlife, in making even the smallest things
happen that you desire that are inalignment with where you want a head.
Right, So let's dive in.So Number one is be willing to try
(04:58):
things on for side. Now,you've probably heard that saying before try it
on for size. Well, didyou know you can actually try goals on
for size. You can try dreamsand desires on for size. Most things
are not a permanent commitment, Soif you dream of moving to a new
city, try arranging things so thatyou can grab a rental there for one
(05:20):
month, a short term rental,and try it out. Bring a couple
of suitcases with you and just seewhat it's like to live as a local.
You don't have to do the bigmove and commit to something that big
to try it on for size.Or if you dream of starting a business
or getting into a new field,try volunteering or interning for a day at
(05:40):
a company that's aligned with that area, right with the area you're interested in
getting into. You don't have toquit what you're doing now and go find
a new job or launch that businessright away. If you're feeling uneasy about
it, try it on for size, dip your toes in. Or if
you're thinking about taking a big tripbut you're trying to get the courage to
(06:01):
book it, and maybe you aregoing to travel alone or your spouse,
it doesn't really you know, getexcited about the idea. Try going to
a local cafe that represents where you'dlike to travel and just immerse yourself for
an hour or so in the feelingof being there. Right. There are
so many great cafes that have differentthemes. There's a wonderful Parisian cafe near
(06:24):
where I live, and I lovejust going there and sitting and maybe having
a glass of wine and a salador a piece of keiche and just enjoying
immersing myself and being in that environmentthat represents the feeling of being in Paris.
Right, So try things on forsize. It's a really great way
to build the courage to take thatnext step. And it's also a great
(06:46):
way to see if maybe something reallyisn't a fit for you after all,
right, Because sometimes we dream ofsomething, or we have a goal,
or we think we want to dosomething, but actually when we try it
out, it's not really a fitfor who we are, or it loses
its luster when we find out someof the details on it that we didn't
know about before. Right, Sothink out of the box of ways that
(07:06):
you can try things on for sizeall Right. Number two, be willing
to commit to moving the needle everysingle day, no matter how small.
This is a mindful practice. Whenyou have a goal in your life that
you're trying to reach, you havesomething you're trying to launch, you have
a new habit you're trying to createpersonally, maybe it's in alignment with your
(07:30):
health or another area of your lifethat you'd like to improve or grow.
Be willing to commit every single dayto doing at least one thing or more
to move things forward in the rightdirection. Even the smallest steps that move
the needle make a difference. Theyall matter. And here's the thing.
None of us is totally on ourgame every single day. We all have
(07:55):
our off days. Even make ithappen. People have days when they do
don't even feel like doing anything.I mean there's days when I wake up
and I'm like, I just can'ttoday, I just can't. Right,
we all have those days. Buthere's the thing. The difference between the
people that make things happen and theones that are just passive that don't really
(08:16):
seem to reach where they want togo, is that the people who are
make it happen people, even ontheir off days, they do one little
thing to move things forward. Theysend that one email, they make that
one call, they do one thingto move the dream forward. And they
also have an inner knowing that it'spart of the human experience to have off
(08:39):
days now and then, and sometimesa day of rest is exactly what we
need to really have great days movingthings forward, right, to get our
energy back. So that's really whatthat's about, is managing those days and
make it happen. People have theinner knowing that they're going to have plenty
of good days when they can reallydive in and move things ahead, right,
(09:01):
So honor your off days, honorthat energy. Don't beat yourself up,
because that will just result in burnout. And also it could really result
in artificially losing interest in your dream. Right. When we burn ourselves out
on something, even if we're passionateabout it, even if we love it,
it can lose its luster for awhile and throw us off track.
(09:22):
So allow yourself an off day nowand then, but be willing to commit
to moving the needle every single day, even in the smallest way. This
is the difference, my friends.All right, number three, Be willing
to fail. It's totally okay ifyou fall on your face. I have
done it plenty of times, believeme. And actually, back to the
(09:46):
story of my book, right,Operation Happiness. The first version of that
book, I actually wrote the proposalfor it about two years before I rewrote
it and created the final for OperationHappiness. And the original version of the
book was called Happiness is Free,I think, And there's a really really
(10:07):
old book written many many years agowith that same title, so that was
a temporary title, but I didn'teven have the title yet. And the
first version of the proposal I hadwritten for a contest which I didn't win.
And I didn't let that failure stopme from moving forward when the time
was right with really having that bookdevelop into all it was meant to be,
(10:31):
right, I didn't let it stopme. So be willing to fail
and know that failure is actually partof success. It really is. The
most successful people in the world havefailed many many many times, and they
have gotten back up and not letit discourage them, and not let it
have them lose faith in who theyare and what they believe in. And
(10:54):
the most successful people have been toldno more times than they can count.
Believe me, I've been told noso many times in my life, and
I really just believe it's a redirectionto the right thing. Sometimes a rejection
is a redirection, right, Youmight have heard that before. So here's
the thing. Also, failure manytimes is just pointing us to the next
(11:18):
right step. So maybe it wasonly that most recent step we took that
kind of messed things up, right, or maybe it was only one element
in the steps you were taking.And so a failure can just mean hey,
take another look and see if there'sa different way to do this.
And it also means you tried.If you fail, it means that you're
(11:39):
already embodying the nature of a makeit happen person. Right, So don't
be afraid. Failure is actually agood thing ninety eight percent of the time,
and even that two percent when it'snot so great, we still learn
from it and grow and maybe it'llbe the catalyst for us to try what
we're really meant for right all right? Number four, This is a big
(12:00):
one, and it might be thehardest of all. Be willing to disappoint
people. Oh, this one isso tough, especially if you have a
people pleasing nature like I do.I've had to work really hard over the
years on not being such a peoplepleaser. It's not necessarily healthful, and
it doesn't necessarily help move us towardour goals and our dreams, and it
(12:22):
certainly doesn't support our own self careand prioritizing what we desire in our life.
So there's a big difference between wantingto please people in a good way,
in a healthy way and make peoplehappy or be kind or do things
to support our loved ones and ourfriends and people in our life. Right
(12:43):
between that and actually being a chronicpeople pleaser, where we sacrifice things that
we want, sacrifice our own wellbeing or our own mental or emotional fitness
for the sake of pleasing others.There's a big difference in those two things.
So we have to be willing todisappoint people when we are so sure
(13:03):
about where we want to go andwhat our dreams are and what we want
to make happen, because the thingis, not everyone is going to like
it or agree. People you lovein your life are sometimes the first one
to tell you, oh, that'snot a great idea, or I don't
really see you doing that, Andit doesn't mean they don't love you,
and it doesn't even mean they don'tsupport you. You're just going to have
(13:24):
naysayers no matter what, or there'sgoing to be people who just don't agree
with what you're doing, or whodon't think it's the right fit, or
who might think it's too risky.Right, they care about you enough and
they love you they don't want tosee you take a risk. But the
thing is you've got to take risksto move the needle in life, and
sometimes when you do that, you'regoing to disappoint some people. And you
(13:46):
also have to prioritize saying no tosome things when you align yourself with prioritizing
your goals, because when you alignyourself with prioritizing your own dreams and goals
and desires, there will be alot of things that try to get in
your way, or maybe previous commitmentsthat you've made that you need to dissolve
(14:07):
and gracefully bow out of in orderto be able to prioritize and have that
energy and have the mindset to goafter what it is you want. So
be willing to gracefully and lovingly disappointpeople, all right. Number five,
I love this one. Nurture yourconfidence in your abilities. Now, this
(14:28):
really comes down to taking part inpractices and mindsets and even programs that help
to nurture your self confidence, yourself esteem, your self worth, and
your inner knowing in your capabilities tomake things happen. You're deep knowing that
you're always going to land on yourfeet no matter what. It takes practice,
(14:50):
and it takes work to really solidifyand develop this type of confidence and
this type of belief in yourself.I've had to work so hard on it,
and every now and then I feelmyself sort of getting out of alignment
and falling off the wagon here alittle bit. And I always circle back
to the mindset work and the personalgrowth work that really helps to support developing
(15:15):
self confidence and belief in ourselves andself worth, that inner knowing when you
have that kind of confidence and youknow that you'll always land on your feet
and that you'll be okay no matterwhat This is a foundational thing, and
it will really support you when you'reready to step forward into making something happen,
because you know you're good and you'vegot confidence, and you're like,
(15:39):
I've got this right. So whatI want you to do right now is
I'm going to give you a secondor two to do it. I want
you wherever you are right now,and if you're in your office with other
people or something, you can whisperit, but I want you to audibly
say the words I've got this.Are you ready, Let's go, I've
got this, You've got this right. It feels good just to speak those
(16:02):
words. And the words we speakto ourselves, by the way, make
a big difference in nurturing our confidenceand our self worth and our self esteem
right, So be careful about thewords you speak to yourself and work on
adding some words to your vocabulary thatfeels supportive, some affirmations that feel like
they build you up right, andwork those in and try to use them
(16:25):
on a frequent basis. That's agreat place to start when you want to
grow and nurture your confidence and yourconfidence in your own abilities. Because make
it happen. People are always veryconfident in their own ability. They're confident
enough that they're actually willing to dothings when they're afraid, even though they're
(16:45):
afraid. Because sometimes when you've gota big goal or a big dream,
it's going to be a little scary, right, And there is actually such
a thing of being fearful of success. And when you nurture your confidence and
your belief in your abilities, ithelps you to be able to take that
first step and move things forward,even when you are a little nervous about
(17:07):
it, even when you might beafraid of the big thing happening that you're
dreaming of. Right. And whenyou do this, when you do this
work, and when you truly cultivatea solid belief in yourself and in your
abilities, you become unstoppable, allright. So that brings us to number
six. This is a really goodone. And actually I would have to
(17:30):
say, out of all of these, this might be the one that helped
me completely change and transform my lifeinto all that it is today and all
that it will be in the future. Because I'm not done, my friends,
I'm just getting started. And maybeyou feel that way too. I
think in many ways we are alljust getting started and It has nothing to
do with age. I know peoplein their eighties who have started new businesses.
(17:53):
I think it's so fantastic. Infact, I just saw something on
Instagram the other day at a couplewho was like ninety one and they were
getting married, and I just thoughtit was the sweetest thing. It's all
how you see things and we're alljust getting started. So with that being
said, number six is be willingto invest in yourself. You are your
(18:19):
own best investment, and you arethe only investment you can make where you
actually have some control over the results. Right. Because you're investing in yourself,
you're not relying on some external factorto do a certain thing before you
see a return on your investment.I love this quote from Warren Buffett.
(18:40):
He says, the best investment youcan make is in yourself. The more
you learn, the more you earn. And I love that so much because
it is so true. A lotof people are hesitant to invest in themselves
and enroll in programs in their ownpersonal or professional development and growth because they're
like, oh, well, Idon't want to spend that money. It
comes from a place of lack,and believe me, I've been there.
(19:03):
Before. But when you actually realizethat your best investment is in you,
nobody can ever take away from youthe growth and the things that you learn
when you invest in yourself and youget into some programs or you know,
a gym membership is a great example, any type of a program that grows
you and supports your mental, physical, and professional health and well being.
(19:27):
Right is investing in you and investingin your own dreams and personal development can
pay off big in so many ways. As mister Buffett says, the more
you learn, the more you earn. There also is some research that shows
that people who invest in their ownpersonal development and professional development and of course
(19:49):
your well being, that they actuallysee an increase in revenue in their business
or an increase in their salary overtime because their performance in increases and their
positive energy increases, and their abilityto make things happen right, which is
the topic of our show today,increases. It's such a big one.
(20:11):
So with that, I also haveto mention that the Joy School, which
is my new monthly membership program,is getting ready to open. It is
so close and I can't tell youhow incredible this program is going to be.
Amazingly supportive like a gym membership forthe soul and for accomplishing your dreams
(20:32):
and for your own self care andcreating your best life and becoming the best
version of you. When I neededsomething like this, I couldn't find anything
out there like it. This isliterally my dream program, and I'm so
excited to share more about it whenit launches with you all. But if
you're intrigued by this by creating thiskind of a support and community in your
(20:55):
life and having access to so manyincredible tools and a whole library of coaching
and mindset concepts and best life creationclasses and inspiration sheets and all kinds of
good stuff, jump over to jointhe joyschool dot com where you can read
more about it and jump on theVIP wait list. There. You'll also
(21:18):
get a free gift when you dothat, but that way you'll be the
first to know when the door's open, because it is happening very soon,
my friends, and I could notbe more excited to offer this all to
you in a super dynamic and incrediblyaffordable way, Like coaching is probably the
thing that's made the biggest difference inmy life, and this program is going
(21:41):
to be so dynamic and so accessible, and that was my dream. Really.
I remember back when I was lookingfor things to support me, I
would find programs that were tens ofthousands of dollars and I was like,
I just am not It's not thatI don't want to, I'm just not
in a place for that right now. And so a lot of the work
that I did in my life,it took me a lot longer than it
(22:03):
would have if I had been insome kind of a program, and it
did end up costing me a lotmore money because instead of investing in one
big program, I invested over theyears in numerous smaller ones. But I
have to tell you it's been greatfor me. And it's also put me
in the position to take the bestof the best of the best of everything
that I've learned, along with allthe coaching that I've developed those skills,
(22:25):
and put it all into one placeto save everybody money and time and pain
and struggle, right And that wasreally my goal. So jump over to
join the joyschool dot com because Iam just so excited to welcome anybody who
this resonates with inside that community whenwe launch, all right with that,
it brings me to the part ofthe show called the Joyschool Habits, and
(22:51):
this is where I share a littlechallenge or a little habit that is a
little bit of effort that can alsohave big impact. I love things the
great return on investment that don't takea lot of effort that can create big
results. And that's what this segmentis all about. And this one this
week is kind of a fun one, and that is take a little bit
(23:11):
of time to be mindful about levelingup your drink wear. So this sounds
totally random, but it is somuch fun. So there's actually studies being
done on how the shape of ourglassware can affect how much we drink,
what we drink, how we thinkabout what we're drinking. And if you're
(23:33):
drinking out of the same mundane glassesall the time, you might want to
think about leveling it up. It'llhelp you stay hydrated, it can bring
you joy, right, I mean, who doesn't love to drink out of
a fancy goblet or a beautiful wineglass, even if you don't drink.
Now, I want to share,and I believe I've noted this before,
that I've drastically cut down on alcoholin my life. This past year.
(23:56):
And one of the things I've donethat was really helpful with that was I
started still allowing myself to enjoy sippingout of a beautiful wineglass. I have
beautiful crystal wine glasses that I justlove. But I'll drink like a little
bit of grapefruit juice with some sparklingwater. Or I will make like a
virgin mimosa with a splash of ojand some sparkling water and a slice of
(24:18):
orange and a little slice of rosemary. Right, make like a fancy mocktail.
Or I'll just drink my morning juiceout of a beautiful glass, right,
or a fancy goblet. And weall know, most of us who
are coffee drinkers, we have afavorite coffee mug. Right. There are
psychological reasons for this, and soit could be really fun to really take
(24:41):
note of your drink wear. Whatare you drinking out of? What are
you reaching for first? Right?I don't know about you, but for
me in the morning, when Igo to make my coffee, if my
favorite coffee mugs are dirty and inthe dishwasher, I'm kind of bummed out.
And then I'm like, well,I guess I'll drink out of this
one today. It really does makea difference. This is a small thing
that when you shifted a bit,can bring a little bit of joy to
(25:03):
your life, and as I mentioned, also help you stay hydrated. Find
healthy beverages that are low in sugarand hydrating and fill beautiful glasses with them
and enjoy them throughout the day andevening. All right. Oh, the
other thing too, I was goingto mention a friend of mine has this
gorgeous glass water bottle that actually hascrystals in the bottom. I believe they're
(25:26):
amethyst, and they charge the waterwith positive energy and the energy of abundance.
And I love that idea. Andyou can even google online drinking water
with crystals and how to use crystalswith drinking water and different things, and
if that appeals to you, thereare ways to do that as well.
But really it's all about what makesyou feel good. So that's the Joyschool
(25:48):
habit for this week. Take alittle bit of an inventory of your drink
wear, notice mindfully what your favoritesare, and work on drinking out of
those more often. See just alittle bit of extra joy and hydration that
brings to your life. All right, Friends, if you enjoyed this episode.
I would be so grateful if youwould hop over and leave a review
(26:11):
on Apple Podcasts or on your favoriteplatform. This truly helps the show and
it helps it reach more people whomight also enjoy it, and I read
them all. Please share with yourfriends on social media and be sure to
connect with me on social media.I'm on Facebook and Instagram quite a bit
and I love connecting with you there. I'm very involved in those communities.
And you can visit my website atChristylinkspencer dot com where you can download some
(26:34):
free gifts and there's some great articlesthere for you and other resources. And
you can also find the link toget on the VIP waitlist for the doors
opening of the Joy School coming up. I am sending you so much love.
I hope you enjoyed this episode anduntil next time, remember you've got
what it takes to create more amazingdays, and more amazing days make up
(26:59):
a pretty amazing life. So goout there and be the make it happen
person that you are at your core. Have a fantastic week, my beautiful
friends, and I will see yousoon
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