February 21, 2024 • 27 mins
Dot tells Helena about her daughter's wedding. Josh and Sara try to sort out several possible Karens. Email Karen returns. Crochet Pants enters the fold. And Ellen catches another mouse.
Starring:
Starring:
- Lori Snyder as Dot
- Adrienne Hardison as Helena
- Sara Stapleton as Karen/Herself
- Josh Hallmark as Himself
- Denise Page as Rosie
- Sara Beth Poole as Ellen
- Podington Bear
- Muddy Waters
- Aurelie
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
M m m m where I would. Oh, you couldn't look at that.
(00:35):
You're enough feature enough to me.I just know you knew Jackie.
She was from the Cul de Sac. Her garage caught fire. My daughter
is fine. She and her friendgot married a few years back. It
(00:56):
was so so. I just don'tlike weddings very much. So many people
and all the drinking. There isnothing more classless than a drunk person.
Weddings are full of drunk people.There's a pick of the wedding on my
Facebook. I had never been toa gay wedding. It was like regular
(01:18):
weddings mostly. I tried to getAhold Patty to do a pet portrait of
Misty. She doesn't have an answeringmachine. The phone just rang and rang.
I did find someone else who doespet portraits nearby. I need to
make sure that they can use aphoto since I can't bring Misty in to
sit for it. Congratulations on yourdaughter's wedding. I don't think I know
(01:44):
any lesbians. Well, my butchermight be a lesbian. She is very
nice and she seems like a lesbianto me. I do know a few
gaze. Do you remember Chris herSon is a gay, nicest guy and
very handsome. One time I wentdown to the gay pride in the city
with them. It was a hotPeople kept asking if Chris and I were
(02:07):
lesbians together. Can you imagine?I'll tell you one thing. The gay
should know how to have fun.I have to drive down to the city
this week. My friend Bob died. Now that I think about it,
I think Bob might have been alesbian. I do remember Jackie. I
(02:29):
didn't care for her. My daughterwas married to a man before they divorced
towards the end of the millennium.Then she and her friend got together.
It was a surprise for everyone.I don't like surprise as much. Her
friend is very nice though she wasraised right. She helps out a lot
(02:52):
of Thanksgiving and the lot is Chris, the woman who used to volunteer at
the church. No, Chris isthe gal. I got arrested with what
(03:47):
Hello, it's the same IP address? What it's the same address? And
so email Karen uh huh emailed mefrom the same IP address, as as
the guy. The strange guy emailKaren. Email Karen is his Facebook?
(04:13):
Karen? Right? Yes? Okay? Is it the same IP address?
As some does the guy who didwhat? Remember the guy who contacted me,
probably like six or seven months afterthe live performance, and he was
like, I know, I havea copy of the letters, and I
know more than like that same.It's like the same person wrote books.
(04:39):
Yes, yes, email man,it's the same. It's the same person
wrote both of those emails. Whatdoes that mean? I have no idea,
but I feel like it's important.Oh my god, So what do
you? What do you do now? Like what I think I I have
(05:00):
to I think I have to messageKaren email Karen. Okay? Yeah?
Is that crazy? Am I openingup a giant bag of worms doing this?
Probably? But like, like,why come at you from two different
angles? I have no idea.January fourth, twenty twelve. Dear Josh,
(05:30):
A friend of mine helped me lookup this blog thing of yours,
and I don't like it one bit. When I emailed you before, I
didn't know that some of the thingson this blog were some of the things
you said were on this blog.It's not fair, and you know it.
I want you to erase the thingsI said in there, especially the
things I didn't say. You betteremail me back and erase all this.
(05:55):
I'm just so confused. I don'tknow what not to believe. Do you
think do you think that are yousure that email Karen is the real Karen's
not just somebody messing with you becauseyour blog was out at that point with
the names with the names, andher emails were like whoa who on the
(06:20):
nose January fourth, twenty twelve,Josh I spent more time looking at me
and Ellen's letters to Mark, andthen I saw you put my email to
you about me and Ellen's letters upwith me and Ellen's letters on the blog.
I don't know why you think thatwhen I want you to raise these
(06:41):
letters, I would want you toput up my email. I'm not stupid,
you know. I know what I'mbeing made fun of. Take all
those down, or I'm going todo something. And maybe it was like
one of those where like something extraordinaryhappens and you just you don't want to
think about other possibilities because like nowthat like perhaps this is what actually took
(07:09):
place, it is feeling like likeit was to Karen. Like even one
of the listeners said, like,there's no way that this woman has not
changed at Paul in twenty five years. Yeah, I mean when I was.
When I was recording those emails,I was literally sitting there going,
how do I make her sound different? Because she'd be, you know,
(07:30):
twenty years older or whatever the mathis. But like, so I'm sitting
there concerned about that her voice isolder, like her literal voice, but
like the voice in the emails isjust dead on, and she had to
have matured. I mean, shehad a kid and maybe a divorce or
totally a divorce if you believe whatshe's said. January fourth, twenty twelve,
(07:55):
Josh, what do you mean I'vegotten popular and me never had a
relationship. We were just friends.We're not friends anymore. We haven't been
friends for a long time. Ifthat's the case, then all the research
we've done has been for not Yeah. But also like that's when Mark freaked
(08:20):
out when he found out I contactedher. So if it's not the real
her, why is Mark? Doyou know how you contacted her or which
Karen that you had talked to becauseyou said you've heard her. Yeah,
so he for all he knows it'sthe Karen. But if he's freaking out
that Karen, then that makes herreal. But I never said either way,
(08:45):
like Karen is her real name?I just said I got in touch
with Karen oh okay. January fourth, twenty twelve, Josh, when I
sent my emails to you, dothey just show up on the Why haven't
you emailed me back yet? Ihave to go to bed soon because I
have to get up tomorrow morning.Ellen was washing the goldfish, and then
(09:11):
that begs the other question, ifthis other fish Ellen whose real name is
not Ellen, is the real Ellen, which just based on five minutes of
scrolling through her profile, I like, I'm pretty sold that she is the
real Ellen. Why would he goto the trouble of changing her name but
(09:33):
not Karen's. January fifth, twentytwelve. Dear Josh, your email was
very nice, but I don't understandhow can all those people read it if
it's in English. That doesn't makea lot of sense to me. I
read a letter from Ellen from Ellenthat said she was washing something in the
backyard when the man looked at her, But she was washing the goldfish.
(09:54):
We used to wash those goldfish,but they kept dying. Anyway, Mark
blamed us for it. He wasa real jerk. We were just trying
to make it buy on our ownand have fun. Why would you come
out and have a drink with meif you haven't even accepted my friend request.
Besides, I don't even know youare all these people paying you to
(10:16):
read my letters on this block?Karen? Okay, Now I'm really curious
about this other Karen that lived inthe house, So I'm gonna go check
her out real quick. Can youcheck, like, can you see what
dates fish Ellen lived there? No, it doesn't show that. Unfortunately,
(10:37):
what we you know, what wouldshow it is Oakland phone books. Okay,
Oakland libraries. They the stop theystopped around the time of our letters.
I mean, the the online onesstarted after they would have moved out.
(10:58):
Isn't that lovely? Yeah? Ofcourse. Okay, So this Karen,
what can we call her? LikeOakland Karen? Like I don't want
to say verified Karen because that makesit sound like we have confirmed she is
the Karen. Yeah, well,she lived in the she lived in the
house. Oh, she has ablog. Shut, he has a blog.
(11:24):
Oh my gosh, I'm sending youthat, like she seems really really
Berkeley. Oh so well, you'llsee when you get there. It's all
about like like about how she's dressingherself, which is very weird like,
it's very kind of bohem like.And how she's making she's making her own
(11:48):
pants. Oh, I have aname for her. And what is it?
This is Karen crochet pants? Why? Oh oh? She wrote a
block, is he it? Shewrote a whole block about these fans being
(12:15):
made just walking around. She's gotboss. Look at your racket of those
little pig panties are even just forwriting style is very aggressive. Do we
(12:35):
know how old she is? Imean she looks like mid forties. She
looks like fifth dish. Okay,so Devil's advocate. Same argument applies,
like why change Ellen's name but notKaren's name? But then counter argument she
(12:58):
well, allan feel there our fishEllen has a very distinct name. Yes,
that's true, so you have toyou'd have to change it. Yeah.
As to where Karen redacted is avery common name, as we have
discovered as Allen redacted, it's verycommon name. Yeah, which made it
(13:22):
really hard to find any Ellen thatwould match her. We need to see
if we can connect crochet Karen crouchetpants. Is that it? Yeah?
Yeah, to fish Ellen and seeif they have any connections. Okay,
I'll see what I can do.Hi, Karen, I don't know if
(13:45):
you remember me. We corresponded backin twenty twelve. I have some of
your old letters, and I thinkwe need to talk, Josh. I
was wondering when you'd get back intouch. I've been listening to your podcast.
When you first messaged Karen, shetold me she didn't know anything about
(14:09):
these letters. It wasn't until youmessaged her again with a link to your
blog that she shared your messages andthe letters with me. The letters are
so funny, and I thought itwould be hilarious to have some fun with
you, so I wrote you thoseemails pretending to be Karen. Then I
wrote you the other email, justto mess with you some more. Karen
(14:30):
is my mother and not the Karenin the letters. She never lived with
anyone named Ellen, had a landlordnamed Mark, or even lived in Oakland.
I started listening to the podcast assoon as you posted about it in
the old Facebook group. At firstI thought it was really funny, and
then I joined the Roomy's Facebook groupand got nervous about all the research that
was happening. Then you included myemails to you in the podcast, and
(14:56):
I realized this had gone too far. I'm sorry we messed with you.
We honestly didn't know anything about anyonein the letters. Sorry we confused you,
especially now because I'm just as curiousas everyone else about who Karen and
Ellen are. If someone reads thison the podcast, please don't make me
(15:16):
sound stupid or like a bitch.Yours not Karen, dude, Josh,
of course that's not Karen, becauseI'm Karen. I'm just kidding. I
couldn't resist. Yeah, So II've read the email like seven times now,
(15:41):
and all I can think of is, uh, dude, you got
catfished. You see, you totallygot catfished? And can we call Max
and Eve and have them film you? And I guess it would be really
fun because I love them. Butserious though, Karen is my mother in
(16:03):
law and not the Karen. Okay, this so much of this makes sense,
but I like everything, like almosteverything I've researched has been based on
this idea that that was Karen.And now, well, of course we
(16:25):
couldn't connect that Karen to fish Ellenbecause that wasn't Karen. So regrouping,
if that wasn't Karen, then letme get back to the murder board.
I'm opening the murder board. Youremember that woman by the name of Karen
(16:52):
crochet Pants. Yeah, let's takea bag. Let's take another look at
Karen crochet Pants, because she's theright age, and she's the right character,
and we can tire to the cottage. So oh, so many possibilities
are now open, which is bothexciting and exceedingly frustrating, because now all
(17:17):
the possibilities are open, a KarenAllen might actually be real. Oh,
I'm so excited. May nineteenth,twenty sixteen. Okay, it's no longer
a secret that one I'm obsessed withChinese checkers and two I'm obsessed with crochet.
(17:41):
What you, loyal reader may notknow is that I'm also obsessed with
our weekly newspaper. But I digress. This post is actually a shameless plug
for my most recent wearable art happening. That is a picture of me in
my brand new homemade crocheape pan.Karen the crochet Goddess has been added again.
(18:07):
The pattern, plain and simple inits one piece designed down model,
works like a dream, and allI needed was enough couch time to finish
these pants off. The yarn comesin about eleven colors, so I'm looking
at about eleven shorts and or pantsin the near future. I'm totally hooked.
Maybe I can make one pair ofcrochet pants in all eleven colors.
(18:33):
And so you guessed it. I'mfinally sporting some crochet pants and I'm not
afraid to show it. A lotof people have wondered at my face how
I was going to pull this off, and well, I don't know.
It seems not like a huge issueto me. But sometimes I get hung
up on things that other people don'tworry about, and the opposite is probably
(18:53):
true, as in things that otherpeople get hung up on, I don't
really get hung up on. Soon, in full display this May afternoon,
I'm wearing some hip hugger swim trunksbeneath the crochet pants. Yesterday I
wore some lightweight tights beneath the pants. And another look will be to wear
a smock type thing over the pants, and well, the options go on
(19:14):
and on. Crochet pants are soversatile. Something tells me I'm not going
to be taking a lot of ordersfor these bad boys, and that's okay,
since I could really use the money. One hundred percent cotton made right
here in the us of A.Next time you think about finding some crochet
pants or shorts, you know whereto look. I'll be sitting out front,
enjoying some sunshine, working up somemad yarn, and putting Kirn a
(19:37):
crochet goddess on the map. Decembernineteenth, twenty ten. Today I met
a woman standing outside the coffee shopwhere I get my dog treats. I
screamed that I loved her bumper stiggercollection and wondered where she lived. I
had already noticed the Oakland Saturn licenseplate frame, but obviously she has moved
to our area. She told methat she once co a woman in Berkeley
(20:00):
who had counted bumper stickers. Shehas thirty. I realize that I have
not taken time or consideration to countours, most likely in the thirty area.
But there's a difference with the smalleststickers versus standard bumper sticker size.
Here are some of my favorites frommy car nineteen eighty eight. Bush quail,
(20:22):
war is peace, real families,value gay relatives, loud and proud
lesbian, Remember who you wanted tobe? God bless the freaks. A
woman without a man is like afish without a bicycle, honor teachers.
I ate a kitchen sink. Idon't know for sure how hot it is
(20:45):
here, but it's hot. It'seven hot inside. Today we went swimming
and there were these huge waves fora lake, and I was in the
water for more than two hours.Renting a house and page, we are
walking everywhere, so I'm as closeto dead as I can be. Luckily
(21:06):
I'm not alone. I hate walking. Why do we need to walk everywhere?
That's what cars are for. Momhas not been letting us watch TV,
so I'm bored as all the kidshere times ten hundred billion and then
some September thirtieth, twenty ten.What's not to love here except that Indigo
doesn't live here. Today was justone of those I love it here days.
(21:33):
In fact, it reminds me ofwhen I first moved here and walked
around, chanting better than Berkeley,better than Berkeley, better than Berkeley,
better than Berkeley. I'd liked Berkeley, but I like it here better.
I like it here way better thanthe other places I lived. Here's where
I like it the best. Soyesterday we drove down to the far South
(21:55):
suburbs for Bill's wake. I lookedaround and I felt that pride of life
here. I think that Here inthe nineteen eighties was probably like Berkeley in
the nineteen eighties. Now, bothof these places are quite a bit different
from what they were, and theyhaven't exactly moved in the same direction.
I'm not a number. I ama free woman. And there are some
really big cockroaches crawling around one ofour local hospitals. May first, twenty
(22:22):
seventeen. Every year, when Idrag out my summer wardrobe bins, my
beloved linen pants get their due attention. This year, it got hot so
fast I found myself wearing the floralprints in late March. Go figure.
And so now that I'm practically fiftyyears old, I'm ready to revamp some
of my looks. And what betterway to dress my fifty year old self
(22:45):
than with long, flowy pants thataren't too hot and aren't too cold and
aren't made of stretchy stuff. Mostof you know, I'm a yarn goddess,
almost to the exclusion of other wearablecrafts. Yarn is my favorite fabric
for the body because it is colorfuland warm and comfortable and colorful and chunky.
But I can sew a mean outfitwhen and if necessary. Sewing can
(23:08):
make me a little crazy, butsewing is also the fastest way to make
clothes. While months can be involvedin yarn fashion, you can sew an
outfit in a day if you haveto, or if it's too warm for
yarn. Okay. Chrische Pants's blogis amazing of red Lake twenty five posts,
and it's so Karen. The thingis, I was going through fish
(23:33):
Ellen's Facebook page the other day andI found a pretty strong Karen contender there.
I still want to do a littlebit of research, but these two
know each other, and I canconnect her to Oakland in eighty seven through
eighty nine. Who Sharon. Idon't know the answer, so I don't
(23:55):
care. This is America anyway,not Singapore. I don't even know what
primary five mouth is. I onlymade it to algebra. I'm doing another
mouse video now. This is Ithink my fourth mouse video, but it's
my sixth or seventh mouse I droveto a different park this time because the
(24:18):
other one was next to a parkinglot and I was worried the mice might
run into the parking lot and getrun over. They paved pairadise and put
up a parking lot. Oh wow, did you see that he went fast?
Well, I wosh I was acatfees swimming in deep blue sea.
(24:49):
I would have all you good lookingwomen fishing fishing after me, fishia after
me, fishing after me, fishingafter me. Old shown up, she
(25:11):
would, Old Lord. I wentto my baby's house and I sat down
her on her style. She said, come on in now, don't matter
(25:34):
you, no, min My husbandjust not left showing up. It's just
not Levet showing up. He's justnot letting Old Lord shown up. He
doesn't Old Lord. Well, Ifeel, yes, I feel Why am
(26:26):
I lie the Lord down? Timingalong, I'm gonna capt the fight?
Things smoking big, back down theroad. I'm going back down the road.
I'm going back down the road.I'm going. That's on the rude.
(26:47):
I'm going. That's down the rule. That's on the rule. I'm
going, that's down the rule.I'm going, Oh DoD shore noth I'm
gone. Oh now he kill
M m m m where I would. Oh, you couldn't look at that.
(00:35):
You're enough feature enough to me.I just know you knew Jackie.
She was from the Cul de Sac. Her garage caught fire. My daughter
is fine. She and her friendgot married a few years back. It
(00:56):
was so so. I just don'tlike weddings very much. So many people
and all the drinking. There isnothing more classless than a drunk person.
Weddings are full of drunk people.There's a pick of the wedding on my
Facebook. I had never been toa gay wedding. It was like regular
(01:18):
weddings mostly. I tried to getAhold Patty to do a pet portrait of
Misty. She doesn't have an answeringmachine. The phone just rang and rang.
I did find someone else who doespet portraits nearby. I need to
make sure that they can use aphoto since I can't bring Misty in to
sit for it. Congratulations on yourdaughter's wedding. I don't think I know
(01:44):
any lesbians. Well, my butchermight be a lesbian. She is very
nice and she seems like a lesbianto me. I do know a few
gaze. Do you remember Chris herSon is a gay, nicest guy and
very handsome. One time I wentdown to the gay pride in the city
with them. It was a hotPeople kept asking if Chris and I were
(02:07):
lesbians together. Can you imagine?I'll tell you one thing. The gay
should know how to have fun.I have to drive down to the city
this week. My friend Bob died. Now that I think about it,
I think Bob might have been alesbian. I do remember Jackie. I
(02:29):
didn't care for her. My daughterwas married to a man before they divorced
towards the end of the millennium.Then she and her friend got together.
It was a surprise for everyone.I don't like surprise as much. Her
friend is very nice though she wasraised right. She helps out a lot
(02:52):
of Thanksgiving and the lot is Chris, the woman who used to volunteer at
the church. No, Chris isthe gal. I got arrested with what
(03:47):
Hello, it's the same IP address? What it's the same address? And
so email Karen uh huh emailed mefrom the same IP address, as as
the guy. The strange guy emailKaren. Email Karen is his Facebook?
(04:13):
Karen? Right? Yes? Okay? Is it the same IP address?
As some does the guy who didwhat? Remember the guy who contacted me,
probably like six or seven months afterthe live performance, and he was
like, I know, I havea copy of the letters, and I
know more than like that same.It's like the same person wrote books.
(04:39):
Yes, yes, email man,it's the same. It's the same person
wrote both of those emails. Whatdoes that mean? I have no idea,
but I feel like it's important.Oh my god, So what do
you? What do you do now? Like what I think I I have
(05:00):
to I think I have to messageKaren email Karen. Okay? Yeah?
Is that crazy? Am I openingup a giant bag of worms doing this?
Probably? But like, like,why come at you from two different
angles? I have no idea.January fourth, twenty twelve. Dear Josh,
(05:30):
A friend of mine helped me lookup this blog thing of yours,
and I don't like it one bit. When I emailed you before, I
didn't know that some of the thingson this blog were some of the things
you said were on this blog.It's not fair, and you know it.
I want you to erase the thingsI said in there, especially the
things I didn't say. You betteremail me back and erase all this.
(05:55):
I'm just so confused. I don'tknow what not to believe. Do you
think do you think that are yousure that email Karen is the real Karen's
not just somebody messing with you becauseyour blog was out at that point with
the names with the names, andher emails were like whoa who on the
(06:20):
nose January fourth, twenty twelve,Josh I spent more time looking at me
and Ellen's letters to Mark, andthen I saw you put my email to
you about me and Ellen's letters upwith me and Ellen's letters on the blog.
I don't know why you think thatwhen I want you to raise these
(06:41):
letters, I would want you toput up my email. I'm not stupid,
you know. I know what I'mbeing made fun of. Take all
those down, or I'm going todo something. And maybe it was like
one of those where like something extraordinaryhappens and you just you don't want to
think about other possibilities because like nowthat like perhaps this is what actually took
(07:09):
place, it is feeling like likeit was to Karen. Like even one
of the listeners said, like,there's no way that this woman has not
changed at Paul in twenty five years. Yeah, I mean when I was.
When I was recording those emails,I was literally sitting there going,
how do I make her sound different? Because she'd be, you know,
(07:30):
twenty years older or whatever the mathis. But like, so I'm sitting
there concerned about that her voice isolder, like her literal voice, but
like the voice in the emails isjust dead on, and she had to
have matured. I mean, shehad a kid and maybe a divorce or
totally a divorce if you believe whatshe's said. January fourth, twenty twelve,
(07:55):
Josh, what do you mean I'vegotten popular and me never had a
relationship. We were just friends.We're not friends anymore. We haven't been
friends for a long time. Ifthat's the case, then all the research
we've done has been for not Yeah. But also like that's when Mark freaked
(08:20):
out when he found out I contactedher. So if it's not the real
her, why is Mark? Doyou know how you contacted her or which
Karen that you had talked to becauseyou said you've heard her. Yeah,
so he for all he knows it'sthe Karen. But if he's freaking out
that Karen, then that makes herreal. But I never said either way,
(08:45):
like Karen is her real name?I just said I got in touch
with Karen oh okay. January fourth, twenty twelve, Josh, when I
sent my emails to you, dothey just show up on the Why haven't
you emailed me back yet? Ihave to go to bed soon because I
have to get up tomorrow morning.Ellen was washing the goldfish, and then
(09:11):
that begs the other question, ifthis other fish Ellen whose real name is
not Ellen, is the real Ellen, which just based on five minutes of
scrolling through her profile, I like, I'm pretty sold that she is the
real Ellen. Why would he goto the trouble of changing her name but
(09:33):
not Karen's. January fifth, twentytwelve. Dear Josh, your email was
very nice, but I don't understandhow can all those people read it if
it's in English. That doesn't makea lot of sense to me. I
read a letter from Ellen from Ellenthat said she was washing something in the
backyard when the man looked at her, But she was washing the goldfish.
(09:54):
We used to wash those goldfish,but they kept dying. Anyway, Mark
blamed us for it. He wasa real jerk. We were just trying
to make it buy on our ownand have fun. Why would you come
out and have a drink with meif you haven't even accepted my friend request.
Besides, I don't even know youare all these people paying you to
(10:16):
read my letters on this block?Karen? Okay, Now I'm really curious
about this other Karen that lived inthe house, So I'm gonna go check
her out real quick. Can youcheck, like, can you see what
dates fish Ellen lived there? No, it doesn't show that. Unfortunately,
(10:37):
what we you know, what wouldshow it is Oakland phone books. Okay,
Oakland libraries. They the stop theystopped around the time of our letters.
I mean, the the online onesstarted after they would have moved out.
(10:58):
Isn't that lovely? Yeah? Ofcourse. Okay, So this Karen,
what can we call her? LikeOakland Karen? Like I don't want
to say verified Karen because that makesit sound like we have confirmed she is
the Karen. Yeah, well,she lived in the she lived in the
house. Oh, she has ablog. Shut, he has a blog.
(11:24):
Oh my gosh, I'm sending youthat, like she seems really really
Berkeley. Oh so well, you'llsee when you get there. It's all
about like like about how she's dressingherself, which is very weird like,
it's very kind of bohem like.And how she's making she's making her own
(11:48):
pants. Oh, I have aname for her. And what is it?
This is Karen crochet pants? Why? Oh oh? She wrote a
block, is he it? Shewrote a whole block about these fans being
(12:15):
made just walking around. She's gotboss. Look at your racket of those
little pig panties are even just forwriting style is very aggressive. Do we
(12:35):
know how old she is? Imean she looks like mid forties. She
looks like fifth dish. Okay,so Devil's advocate. Same argument applies,
like why change Ellen's name but notKaren's name? But then counter argument she
(12:58):
well, allan feel there our fishEllen has a very distinct name. Yes,
that's true, so you have toyou'd have to change it. Yeah.
As to where Karen redacted is avery common name, as we have
discovered as Allen redacted, it's verycommon name. Yeah, which made it
(13:22):
really hard to find any Ellen thatwould match her. We need to see
if we can connect crochet Karen crouchetpants. Is that it? Yeah?
Yeah, to fish Ellen and seeif they have any connections. Okay,
I'll see what I can do.Hi, Karen, I don't know if
(13:45):
you remember me. We corresponded backin twenty twelve. I have some of
your old letters, and I thinkwe need to talk, Josh. I
was wondering when you'd get back intouch. I've been listening to your podcast.
When you first messaged Karen, shetold me she didn't know anything about
(14:09):
these letters. It wasn't until youmessaged her again with a link to your
blog that she shared your messages andthe letters with me. The letters are
so funny, and I thought itwould be hilarious to have some fun with
you, so I wrote you thoseemails pretending to be Karen. Then I
wrote you the other email, justto mess with you some more. Karen
(14:30):
is my mother and not the Karenin the letters. She never lived with
anyone named Ellen, had a landlordnamed Mark, or even lived in Oakland.
I started listening to the podcast assoon as you posted about it in
the old Facebook group. At firstI thought it was really funny, and
then I joined the Roomy's Facebook groupand got nervous about all the research that
was happening. Then you included myemails to you in the podcast, and
(14:56):
I realized this had gone too far. I'm sorry we messed with you.
We honestly didn't know anything about anyonein the letters. Sorry we confused you,
especially now because I'm just as curiousas everyone else about who Karen and
Ellen are. If someone reads thison the podcast, please don't make me
(15:16):
sound stupid or like a bitch.Yours not Karen, dude, Josh,
of course that's not Karen, becauseI'm Karen. I'm just kidding. I
couldn't resist. Yeah, So II've read the email like seven times now,
(15:41):
and all I can think of is, uh, dude, you got
catfished. You see, you totallygot catfished? And can we call Max
and Eve and have them film you? And I guess it would be really
fun because I love them. Butserious though, Karen is my mother in
(16:03):
law and not the Karen. Okay, this so much of this makes sense,
but I like everything, like almosteverything I've researched has been based on
this idea that that was Karen.And now, well, of course we
(16:25):
couldn't connect that Karen to fish Ellenbecause that wasn't Karen. So regrouping,
if that wasn't Karen, then letme get back to the murder board.
I'm opening the murder board. Youremember that woman by the name of Karen
(16:52):
crochet Pants. Yeah, let's takea bag. Let's take another look at
Karen crochet Pants, because she's theright age, and she's the right character,
and we can tire to the cottage. So oh, so many possibilities
are now open, which is bothexciting and exceedingly frustrating, because now all
(17:17):
the possibilities are open, a KarenAllen might actually be real. Oh,
I'm so excited. May nineteenth,twenty sixteen. Okay, it's no longer
a secret that one I'm obsessed withChinese checkers and two I'm obsessed with crochet.
(17:41):
What you, loyal reader may notknow is that I'm also obsessed with
our weekly newspaper. But I digress. This post is actually a shameless plug
for my most recent wearable art happening. That is a picture of me in
my brand new homemade crocheape pan.Karen the crochet Goddess has been added again.
(18:07):
The pattern, plain and simple inits one piece designed down model,
works like a dream, and allI needed was enough couch time to finish
these pants off. The yarn comesin about eleven colors, so I'm looking
at about eleven shorts and or pantsin the near future. I'm totally hooked.
Maybe I can make one pair ofcrochet pants in all eleven colors.
(18:33):
And so you guessed it. I'mfinally sporting some crochet pants and I'm not
afraid to show it. A lotof people have wondered at my face how
I was going to pull this off, and well, I don't know.
It seems not like a huge issueto me. But sometimes I get hung
up on things that other people don'tworry about, and the opposite is probably
(18:53):
true, as in things that otherpeople get hung up on, I don't
really get hung up on. Soon, in full display this May afternoon,
I'm wearing some hip hugger swim trunksbeneath the crochet pants. Yesterday I
wore some lightweight tights beneath the pants. And another look will be to wear
a smock type thing over the pants, and well, the options go on
(19:14):
and on. Crochet pants are soversatile. Something tells me I'm not going
to be taking a lot of ordersfor these bad boys, and that's okay,
since I could really use the money. One hundred percent cotton made right
here in the us of A.Next time you think about finding some crochet
pants or shorts, you know whereto look. I'll be sitting out front,
enjoying some sunshine, working up somemad yarn, and putting Kirn a
(19:37):
crochet goddess on the map. Decembernineteenth, twenty ten. Today I met
a woman standing outside the coffee shopwhere I get my dog treats. I
screamed that I loved her bumper stiggercollection and wondered where she lived. I
had already noticed the Oakland Saturn licenseplate frame, but obviously she has moved
to our area. She told methat she once co a woman in Berkeley
(20:00):
who had counted bumper stickers. Shehas thirty. I realize that I have
not taken time or consideration to countours, most likely in the thirty area.
But there's a difference with the smalleststickers versus standard bumper sticker size.
Here are some of my favorites frommy car nineteen eighty eight. Bush quail,
(20:22):
war is peace, real families,value gay relatives, loud and proud
lesbian, Remember who you wanted tobe? God bless the freaks. A
woman without a man is like afish without a bicycle, honor teachers.
I ate a kitchen sink. Idon't know for sure how hot it is
(20:45):
here, but it's hot. It'seven hot inside. Today we went swimming
and there were these huge waves fora lake, and I was in the
water for more than two hours.Renting a house and page, we are
walking everywhere, so I'm as closeto dead as I can be. Luckily
(21:06):
I'm not alone. I hate walking. Why do we need to walk everywhere?
That's what cars are for. Momhas not been letting us watch TV,
so I'm bored as all the kidshere times ten hundred billion and then
some September thirtieth, twenty ten.What's not to love here except that Indigo
doesn't live here. Today was justone of those I love it here days.
(21:33):
In fact, it reminds me ofwhen I first moved here and walked
around, chanting better than Berkeley,better than Berkeley, better than Berkeley,
better than Berkeley. I'd liked Berkeley, but I like it here better.
I like it here way better thanthe other places I lived. Here's where
I like it the best. Soyesterday we drove down to the far South
(21:55):
suburbs for Bill's wake. I lookedaround and I felt that pride of life
here. I think that Here inthe nineteen eighties was probably like Berkeley in
the nineteen eighties. Now, bothof these places are quite a bit different
from what they were, and theyhaven't exactly moved in the same direction.
I'm not a number. I ama free woman. And there are some
really big cockroaches crawling around one ofour local hospitals. May first, twenty
(22:22):
seventeen. Every year, when Idrag out my summer wardrobe bins, my
beloved linen pants get their due attention. This year, it got hot so
fast I found myself wearing the floralprints in late March. Go figure.
And so now that I'm practically fiftyyears old, I'm ready to revamp some
of my looks. And what betterway to dress my fifty year old self
(22:45):
than with long, flowy pants thataren't too hot and aren't too cold and
aren't made of stretchy stuff. Mostof you know, I'm a yarn goddess,
almost to the exclusion of other wearablecrafts. Yarn is my favorite fabric
for the body because it is colorfuland warm and comfortable and colorful and chunky.
But I can sew a mean outfitwhen and if necessary. Sewing can
(23:08):
make me a little crazy, butsewing is also the fastest way to make
clothes. While months can be involvedin yarn fashion, you can sew an
outfit in a day if you haveto, or if it's too warm for
yarn. Okay. Chrische Pants's blogis amazing of red Lake twenty five posts,
and it's so Karen. The thingis, I was going through fish
(23:33):
Ellen's Facebook page the other day andI found a pretty strong Karen contender there.
I still want to do a littlebit of research, but these two
know each other, and I canconnect her to Oakland in eighty seven through
eighty nine. Who Sharon. Idon't know the answer, so I don't
(23:55):
care. This is America anyway,not Singapore. I don't even know what
primary five mouth is. I onlymade it to algebra. I'm doing another
mouse video now. This is Ithink my fourth mouse video, but it's
my sixth or seventh mouse I droveto a different park this time because the
(24:18):
other one was next to a parkinglot and I was worried the mice might
run into the parking lot and getrun over. They paved pairadise and put
up a parking lot. Oh wow, did you see that he went fast?
Well, I wosh I was acatfees swimming in deep blue sea.
(24:49):
I would have all you good lookingwomen fishing fishing after me, fishia after
me, fishing after me, fishingafter me. Old shown up, she
(25:11):
would, Old Lord. I wentto my baby's house and I sat down
her on her style. She said, come on in now, don't matter
(25:34):
you, no, min My husbandjust not left showing up. It's just
not Levet showing up. He's justnot letting Old Lord shown up. He
doesn't Old Lord. Well, Ifeel, yes, I feel Why am
(26:26):
I lie the Lord down? Timingalong, I'm gonna capt the fight?
Things smoking big, back down theroad. I'm going back down the road.
I'm going back down the road.I'm going. That's on the rude.
(26:47):
I'm going. That's down the rule. That's on the rule. I'm
going, that's down the rule.I'm going, Oh DoD shore noth I'm
gone. Oh now he kill
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