FROM THE GUTTER TO GREATNESS_ 21 DAY CHALLENGE

Join us Wednesday, June 11th at 9 AM EST on an all new episode of The Kim Jacobs Show! Dr. Paul Miller — educator, author, podcast host, and transformational leader will be our special guest!
Growing up in Rochester, NY, Dr. Miller faced the harsh realities of urban life. But instead of becoming a statistic, he became a catalyst for change. As CEO of Charter Champions and Urbane Education, he has revolutionized urban education, raised graduation rates, and mentored countless young men of color toward success.
His journey is captured in his top-rated podcast, "From the Gutter to Greatness," and now he's challenging others to rise above adversity with his new book, "From the Gutter to Greatness: 21 Day Challenge."
Tag a friend who needs some midweek motivation!
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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Show lined up for you. I'm your host, Kim Jacobs,
better known as the Balance Doctor, and all of our
guests that come on there either people that have overcome
some tremendous odds in their own lives as they balance
this thing called life, or they're experts and they're here
to share tips and strategies that will help you better
balance and manage your life. Grab your virtual seats and

(00:22):
let's get ready for some real, relevant and relatable content
on today's episode of The Kim Jacobs Show. That Jacob.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Hello, everyone, and.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
Welcome to this episode of The Kim Jacobs Show, where
we are bringing balance to the world, I should say,
bringing balance to your household, one household at a time.
We are doing that today with doctor Paul Miller. How
are you today, doctor Paul?

Speaker 2 (00:54):
Hey, good morning everybody. I'm doing real well. Uh you are.

Speaker 1 (00:57):
You're doing really well and you are light in this
world and so glad to have you here today.

Speaker 2 (01:03):
Oh, thank you for that ing me be here.

Speaker 1 (01:05):
Listen, y'all, we're gonna be talking about how to come
from the gutter to greatness. It's a whole thing in
between going from the gutter to greatness. How do we
make that a reality in our lives. And so doctor Paul,
as people are grabbing their virtual seats, I would almost say,
almost like a commercial, many many commercial type of thing,

(01:27):
what would you say to people today just to.

Speaker 2 (01:31):
Give them a little teaser of what they can expect.

Speaker 3 (01:34):
See if you think about the gutter as the gutters
on your houses, right, so when the gutter is is clogged,
and the gutters aren't really expensive pieces of apparatus, right,
but there when your gutters are clogged, they will do
damage to your roof, They'll do damage to the interior
of your house. They will do damage to the exterior
of your house. When their clock is the water is going.

Speaker 2 (01:55):
To back up.

Speaker 3 (01:55):
So moving from your gut to greatness is all about
unclogging your gutter so the water flows freely so that
you have the ability to remove the damage that you're
doing to yourself internally to your own house.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
Now you're gonna make me, you know how, somebody say
you go makee me throw something over here, Get grab
the remote and just throw it and you're like, oh man,
drop the mic.

Speaker 2 (02:16):
So that's that's what we're talking about today. I never
even thought.

Speaker 1 (02:19):
About it from that perspective as far as until I
encountered you in this regard getting that gutter cleared so
that you can have the right mind space to accomplish
the greatness that lies within you.

Speaker 2 (02:31):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (02:32):
Wow, Okay, y'all, anybody else got some emojis you want
to put over there? Some you know, praise the Lord,
running through the streets, and some great stuff happening. Listen
today when we're talking to doctor Paul Miller, I want
you all to be active participants, share any thoughts, questions.
Don't go through this life and knowing that we have

(02:52):
an expert right here that can answer some things that
you're personally dealing with and you let them get off
the show. This is free almost free counseling type situation.
Get your questions, answer what has you stuck?

Speaker 2 (03:04):
What has you clogged?

Speaker 1 (03:06):
Those are things you want to get answers to and
get them right from doctor Paul Miller today. So let
me let you know who this person is. He definitely
is a man that grew up facing some very harsh
realities in the urban life of Rochester, New York, and
those challenges of poverty and lack of role models could
have easily set him on a different path, but instead,

(03:28):
he chose to become doctor Paul Miller, and I'm gonna
let him tell you about his transformation, his backstory, how
he is now the CEO of multiple organizations including Charter Communicate,
Charter Champions, and Urban Education. So I'm not gonna go
and read all of the bio stuff because I want
you to hear from him. Take us on a journey

(03:50):
through your backstory and who you are from some of
your younger years to become who you are today.

Speaker 2 (03:56):
Sure, thank you. I'm going to share my gutter story
right yes, really so. I grew up in Rochester, New York.

Speaker 3 (04:04):
So for those of you who don't understand Rochester, the
level of poverty here, Rochester is the third poorest city
in the country. Rochester often has the highest murder rates
per capital in New York State. Excuse me, has the
highest murder rates per capital in New York State. Rochester
also has the lowest education even currently it's six forty
six out of six forty six out of school districts

(04:25):
in New York State. The last time they published graduation
rates for Rochester for black males, it was nine percent.
So nine percent graduated, so that means ninety one percent
of black males didn't graduate when they.

Speaker 2 (04:37):
Published those rates.

Speaker 3 (04:38):
Right, So the proficiency rate for math is two percent,
the proficiency rate for ELA is eight percent. So now
we think about that, that's ninety ninety what eight percent
of the individuals are not on grade level here? Ninety
two are not percent on grade level for ELA. So

(05:00):
this is the city that I grew up in, and
I grew up in the middle of the projects here.
We didn't start in the project though, so we started off.
I remember when I was young, we started off and
we had a house, We had a home. My mom
had a business in the home, and so she was
a hairdresser, and my grandparents helped her purchase this home.
And when we had this house, and it was still
in an urban area in the city, in the middle
of the hood.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
But we had a nice house.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
And so due to depression and due to domestic violence,
and due to all these aspects that happened, my mother
would often come downstairs after an incident with my stepfather
with her nose bleeding and then come to do a
lady's hair. And you know, people don't want to get
their hair done under those circumstances.

Speaker 2 (05:39):
No, so it was pretty crazy.

Speaker 3 (05:42):
So it ended up where we lost a house, and
so my mother was very depressed. She was depressed because
she often felt unloved and cared about and unwanted right
and she didn't get what she needed, and so that
trauma led her to depression.

Speaker 2 (05:57):
And so she would lock herself in a room.

Speaker 3 (05:59):
And so she would lock her self in a room
when my stepfather wasn't around, because she was often depressed
that he wasn't there. And then she would lock herself
in the room when he was around because she wanted
to be with him. So I often had the privilege
of being able to raise myself. So when I say that,
you know, I say it jokingly. And mothers had a

(06:20):
lot of time to heal and growth and transformation, and
so she's a different person now. But I often spend
a lot of time alone and spell. And then also
what happened was I developed those feelings of feeling unloved, unwanted,
and uncared about. And so at that early age, we
lost the house. And when we lost the house, we
ended up moving to the projects. And so we moved

(06:41):
to the projects in probably one of the most challenged
areas in Rochester. And so but the projects became home.
You know, there becomes family. There's good, bad and ugly
there and so but the projects where I grew up
at in the eighties, it was somewhere where if you
weren't from there, you probably didn't go through there, especially
at night time if you want to. Now, So growing

(07:05):
up there, and then we moved. When we moved, what
I didn't mention is my stepfather was addicted to crack cocaine,
and so we moved next to the dope house. And
so when we moved next to the dope house, what
do you think happened? We often had items missing and
we'd have to I'd have to try to negotiate because
one of my best friend's brothers ran the dope house,
and we would try to get my stuff back and

(07:27):
and there would.

Speaker 2 (07:27):
Be uh, you know.

Speaker 3 (07:29):
Overall, those were just some of the minor experiences that
started to shape and form that that gutter. But what
I knew throughout this time was is that I had
choices to make. And see, what I deeply believe is
that God has a plan for all of us. And
so with that plan for all of us, he already
knows what's going to happen he knows the good, the bad,

(07:50):
the ugly, and he has it all scripted out. And
then it's our choice, do we follow that plan or not?
Are we going to choose? Are we going to follow
that plan? Are we going to walk in that And
there was a lot of times because of my trauma,
I didn't always walk in that plan. I made a
lot of decisions and choices.

Speaker 2 (08:05):
You know.

Speaker 3 (08:05):
I was one of those young men that I had
to experience things sometimes a difficult wait where where? And
luckily I never got locked up or I never had
any run ins with the law, but I still was
experiencing things where I was selling drugs, I was involved
in street life, and I was doing things that I
knew wasn't part of God's.

Speaker 2 (08:24):
Plan for me. That's right, That's right.

Speaker 3 (08:26):
So I would often get signs, and there was there
was a few times where in one specific time, and
I tell the story, and I believe I tell it
in the book too, from the gut of the Greatness,
and I tell the story where I was riding down
one of the streets here in Rochester and I had
a large quantity of drugs on me and I was

(08:46):
going to drop them off at the spot where we
were going to sell it that and all of a sudden,
my tire blows out, and my tire blows out, and
I get out, and I'm nervous. I'm scared. But I
hear God speak to me and say this is a warning.
And when He's spoke to me and said this is
a warning, like I heard it, it was a warning.
And they say warning has come before destruction, right, And

(09:07):
so the warning that I got was saying, hey, this
is just a flat tire, but if you continue to
do what you're doing, there's going to be more than
just this warning. Whether it was death, whether it was incarceration,
whatever it could have been. I knew that I had
choices to make, and I had to either listen to

(09:29):
what God was telling me, or I had to either
be really really good and become this leader and help
transform education, or I had to become really good at
being bad.

Speaker 2 (09:40):
And either way making a choice.

Speaker 3 (09:42):
I had to make this choice. And so I heard
that and I listened. And so I was a good athlete.
I wasn't great. I played played some football. I've always
been a decent athlete, and I played some Division one
football and got hurt, got hurt because one thing I
always did was even though I was involved in some
activity that I knew wasn't favorable, I still maintained my

(10:06):
ability by going to school. So, and what I figured
out early on was if I did well in school,
people would leave me alone and they wouldn't question or
be inquisitive about the other things.

Speaker 2 (10:16):
Right right, right?

Speaker 3 (10:20):
Okay, great, you know, so I always did even though
I never really liked it, I did well at school
and so I was doing good.

Speaker 2 (10:27):
I went on, played some football, got hurt.

Speaker 3 (10:30):
And so if you asked me when I was a kid,
what did I want to do or what did I
want to be, I would have said I want to
play in the NFL, right right? And I wasn't good
enough to play in the NFL. That's what That's what
I thought in my head, and there were glimpses of it.
But God was preparing me for something else, and he
was kind of showing me what my superpower was going
to be. And a lot of it came through understandings

(10:51):
and lessons that I learned through sports or playing football
or some other things. And that superpower wasn't to play
in the NFL or the NBA. What it was actually,
God was giving me the gift of perseverance, and so
so like he put this gift on my heart and
he gave it to me. And even though He gave
me this gift, I had to start to realize what

(11:12):
that gift was. I didn't always realize it or apply
it because my gutters were clogged. And so my gutters
were often clogged, and I was stuck. I was stuck
in places. Even though professionally I was moving in the
right directions, personally, I still was clogged. And so I then,
even though I went through school and I transitioned out

(11:35):
of street life and doing those things, I came back
because I was hurt from playing football, and I decided,
you know what, I want to be a teacher. And
so I decided I want to be a teacher because
I like sports, I like kids. So I'm going to
become a teacher and a physical education teacher at the time. Okay,
so I became a physical education teacher. And at this
point in time, I started to see the plan reveal
of what God wanted from me, and I started to

(11:57):
follow this because he wanted me to affect life lives
and is affected through education.

Speaker 2 (12:02):
And so now mind you all of this.

Speaker 3 (12:05):
I'm doing all this, and I'm pushing forward, but I
never really fully addressed a lot of those things that
are underlying because as a black male, we often feel
like our emotions. We're not supposed to be able to
talk about our emotions. We're not supposed to be able
to talk about our feelings. It's not safe. Like we
don't go into the You don't go into the barbershop
and tell them, well, well I feel scared today.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
You don't.

Speaker 3 (12:29):
You know, that's a conversation that you talk about, right,
Or that I'm hurt she broke my heart or my
mother left me, and.

Speaker 2 (12:36):
You don't come in whatever, right, those conversations, right.

Speaker 3 (12:40):
So I wasn't working on those things, but I was
working on myself professionally, and I decided to become a teacher.
And then as a teacher, I was in the Rochester
City School District. I often saw that they were making
horrible decisions for kids, and I saw that what they
were doing wasn't helping, and leaders were making these decisions
were self servient, and so I said, let me be

(13:03):
part of the solution of the problem. So I went
and got a master's degree and then became the ability
to become an educational administrator and became a leader. I
started off as an assistant principal, and then I saw it
was even worse, Kim, it was even worse Like I
saw leaders. Now I knew where the bodies were buried,
and I knew behind the.

Speaker 2 (13:23):
Scenes, and you're on the inside. You're on inside.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
And they would often ask me to do things that
were unethical and that I disagreed with, and I would
choose not to, and because I chose not to, it
became confrontational at times, and so even times where I
was found out later I was held back from opportunities
because of this. And so but again that God gave
me that superpower of perseverance that said, you know what,

(13:48):
you got to find a way to go over, around,
under and through and you got to apply it to this.
So I went and got a doctorate. And so I
went and got a doctorate in executive leadership. And I
walked into those classes feeling like, what the what the
heck am I doing? Because you know, I didn't feel
like I was good enough to be there. And so
I quickly realized that I could compete if I did

(14:09):
the work so it was about my effort, not my ability.

Speaker 2 (14:12):
So I've always had the ability, but I had to
put the effort in. That's a lot of time.

Speaker 3 (14:15):
What people are missing is they're missing there. They're missing
putting the effort in. They have the ability, but they're
not putting the effort in. So I put the effort in.
I ended up doing extremely well, won the dissertation of
the year, turned it into book, all that other stuff,
and then I got a call one day that said, hey,
we got an opportunity for you to move to Albany,
New York and take on a school. At the time,

(14:38):
it was one school, and I said, I said, no,
thank you, I'm not interested. I'm gonna stay in Rochester
and I'm gonna help my community. I'm gonna do this,
I'm gonna do that. And you know, I wasn't listening,
so I had to pray. I had to connect, and
then finally they kept asking and I went down to Albany,
and when I left the interview, God spoke to me again.
He said, get ready, family about to move. And the

(15:02):
next day I got a call. So God talks to
me and I hear them and I listen.

Speaker 2 (15:08):
And that's a good thing. You got to listen. So
I moved and we moved to Albany.

Speaker 3 (15:13):
I took the job, and it was at the time
the school was and it still is, all boys, but
ninety seven percent black and brownium men and ninety percent poverty.
And so when I got there, there was about a
fifty seven percent graduation rate. There was about two hundred
and fifty thousand in scholarship money, and there was a

(15:34):
month in my business manager came to me and said,
we're not going to meet payroll next month.

Speaker 2 (15:39):
We're ninety thousand dollars short. What you're gonna do?

Speaker 3 (15:41):
So there was financial issues, and so what I did
was I figured it out again because God gave me
the gifts and the abilities to do so I figured
it out.

Speaker 2 (15:49):
I humble myself, I listened, I learned.

Speaker 3 (15:52):
But within the first year and the eleven years I
was there, we averaged a ninety five percent graduation rate,
one hundred percent acceptance to college, twenty five million scholarship money,
and I left there was two million in the bank.

Speaker 1 (16:02):
And my question, my question to you is what innovative
strategies did you implement for that to happen? Because that's
a significant turnaround from what was being experienced prior to
you getting there, right.

Speaker 3 (16:16):
And so the strategies have to do with actually doing
what you say you're going to do, and a lot
of people talk about it but don't be about it right.

Speaker 2 (16:25):
So and there's more into that.

Speaker 3 (16:28):
And one of my companies is called Building Capacity where
we're opening schools and we're in the process of opening
four schools right now and some other things. But the
innovative strategies have to do around four pillars. So the
four pillars are first a building relationships and so what
does that look like within the school? And we build
systems that work around building relationships.

Speaker 1 (16:48):
And somebody type that building relationships. Let's type some of
these takeaways so you can go back and look at
them later. Building relationships, okay, And with the relationships, it's
about intimately building relationships between all the different constituencies, parents, community, administrators, kids,
and there's specific things that we will do underneath that.

(17:08):
The second piece is directly about making sure that teaching
and learning is happening, and that's happening on a high level.
So the pillar is all based on teaching learning, making
sure that there's systems around teaching and learning and that
it's unified and make sure that there's good instruction going
on that's engaging students in every area of the school.

(17:30):
And then we ended up the third one is data
for instruction, so actually using your data to inform your
instruction's decisions. See a lot of people will talk about it,
but they don't use the data or they don't use
the right pieces of day, and so they don't use
it to inform their instruction in a way that actually
changes it. And then be willing to change your instruction

(17:51):
or change the way that you're building relationships based off
what the data is telling you. And the last piece
that is foundational. It has to do with something that
most adults don't like, accountability. So accountability is about accountability
for all. It's about accountability for me as the leader,
accountability for all of the teachers, administrators, parents' kids, community

(18:15):
through a cultural lens of what they call collective teacher efficacies.
So believing that the teachers are the biggest piece that
moved the needle for the kids and building this culture
of consistency around these pillars, and you're able to build
schools that work. So I started with seventy five percent
of the kids that came to me were on a

(18:35):
third and fourth grade reading level. We got them all
to college and all there were years where we had
a ninety two ninety three percent matriculation rate where they
actually were going to college and in school. Then I
opened the middle school because the middle school was we
needed to get the kids earlier. But fifty percent of
those kids that came to me were on a pre

(18:56):
k to third grade level, and so with that pre
k to third grade level, we had to do some
things differently and build those same type of systems but
for middle school kids. And when we did, we also
integrated a STEM based learning curriculum that really helped their
foundational skills. Those eighty five percent of those kids will
go on to high school with Regent's credits in maths, science,
and Spanish, and so we were able to turn their

(19:18):
lives around too as well and make a difference.

Speaker 3 (19:21):
And so that that kind of leads me to where
I am today, where I have five books. I'm about
to release a six one which is a children's question.
Thank you, I appreciate I've speaking all over the world.
I was at Oxford speaking recently, be in South Africa,
soon I'm all over.

Speaker 2 (19:36):
The United States.

Speaker 3 (19:38):
I'm here in my organization running Charter Champions, supporting the
twenty seven charter schools in Rochester, filling the gaps. And then,
last but not least, I have an organization called Building Capacity,
and we're in the process of opening schools. We have
one approved, we're writing for three more and submitted, and
we're going to open starting with four schools hopefully in

(19:59):
the next year or two, and then grow out to
expand all over the country to help change communities. So
that's kind of like the long short version of my gutter.
But I go back to I didn't start unpacking the
gutter until I had some incidents or some traumatic things
happened when I was in my early forties.

Speaker 1 (20:20):
Okay, so in your early forties there was a pivotal
turning point that really shifted things to all of this
greatness that you're describing that you just talked about.

Speaker 2 (20:30):
So what was that situation?

Speaker 3 (20:32):
So you know what, sometimes you got to go through
traumatic things to realize you need to work on your
own healing. I need to start unclogging that gutter. So
professional I was living that duality, but personally, you know,
so one of the things the tenants of leadership is
called modeling the way right, And so I was modeling it.
I thought I was, but I wasn't doing it at

(20:54):
home all the way. And so I had this drama
and this trauma. And often so my issue, like I've
never had any issue with drugs or alcohol, My issue
has always been women, Like I've always loved the ladies, right,
and so like, hey girl, hey, like you know, like
you know, but you know, I've always loved the ladies

(21:15):
and so that, but why and so I, you know, unpacking.

Speaker 2 (21:20):
I had to start unpacking it.

Speaker 3 (21:21):
So when I think of the gutter, you know, I
have an acronym for it, and you start grieving your past,
you know, and and grieving your past and being okay
with these being okay with it and accepting it, being
willing to learn from it, and being and and it's
kind of sitting it. Don't run from it, don't let
it be your prison right. And so the you is

(21:44):
is understanding the wound. So I had to start to
understand the wound. And so understanding the wound for me
was realizing that the issues that I had, the trauma,
a lot of it came from my relationship with my mother,
feeling alone, unloved, and unwanted. And so when I unloved
and unwanted, I often felt uncared about. And so early
on I had some young sexual experiences that I don't

(22:07):
condone to say that was like the right way to
start living. Early on, I also had a lot of
reference points that were wrong. So I had, you know,
like thinking about that PEMP culture as positive, Like I
remember the song bees ain't ish but hoes and tricks right,
And so I remember like that being ingreen to you
the music you listen to, the way you think is

(22:29):
the way you act.

Speaker 2 (22:29):
The way you act is what you're attracted.

Speaker 3 (22:30):
And so I'm taking those thoughts into what I've seen,
into what I've lived, and also how I feel, into
my spirit. And so I'm in a spot where I
start to learn that that quantity is better than quality.
That I start to that trauma is making me feel
like like anytime I feel hurt, unloved, and uncarred about,

(22:51):
I want a new sexual experience to make me feel
loved and wanted and make me feel careed about. And
so it would be my replacement, it'd be my vice.
You know, a lot of people have their vices, and
that would be my vice. And so what's interesting, I
believe is that I ended up marrying somebody that I
felt was just like my mother and so and so

(23:14):
they say, you become just like your trauma, or you
become just the opposite of it, right, and so in
many ways, I became the opposite of it. And I
had changed my life in a lot of ways. But
internally and personally, I had become just like it because
I had picked somebody that also made me feel uncared, unloved,
and unwanted. And when she made me feel like that,

(23:34):
I started running them streets, you know, I started. I
was dibbling and dabbling and doing and not from a
legal uh selling pharmaceuticals tactors, but from you know, finding
different women to make my feeling fulfilling my vice, to
make make me feel better. And so you know that
kind of And you know, she definitely had her faults

(23:56):
in the relationship and I had mine. And as we
came to a head after seventeen years of marriage and
we ended up getting divorced, I said, you know what,
I can't keep living like this. I got to do
something different, and I got to I got to retrain
my brain, and I got to the same way that
you can retrain a muscle, you can retrain.

Speaker 2 (24:19):
Your brain, you can heal from you can.

Speaker 3 (24:22):
Work that brain and you and but a lot of
it is going back to what is God's voice?

Speaker 2 (24:27):
What are you hearing? And then the tea is tell
the truth about it?

Speaker 3 (24:31):
Right, So after I understand the world, I had to
tell the truth about it, and I had to tell
the truth about it. I had to understand where it's
coming from and use that to start to transform. And
as I told the truth about it, I had to
be able to turn my pain into my purpose. Right,
And so how can now you know? And so for

(24:52):
God for me, I started writing. And so I had
already had three books at the time, and I started
writing the fourth book, which is From the Gut.

Speaker 2 (25:01):
To the Greatness. And so that is what I started writing.

Speaker 3 (25:09):
And I just poured everything in there and put everything
in there, and not in a way that it was
just like a gossip tellow, but like a guide for
a journey to help people move from their gut to greatness.
So I'm going to turn my pain into my purpose
and help other people with my purpose, and really my

(25:30):
superpower is perseverance. I'm going to give the gift of saying, hey,
this is what I went through, this is how I
got through it. Now I'm going to help you reflect
on how can you get through it? And so you know,
then you equip yourself as the e right. So the
equip yourself is with the right tools. So part of
the right tools is I wrote a workbook. And so
the workbook is moving from your gut to the greatness.

(25:53):
And it's a twenty one day challenge. And so that
twenty one day challenge is and there's actually twenty four
days of just because it saying it takes twenty one
days to break a habit, twenty four in there to
give you a little extra, but there's twenty four days
of challenges that you will move through that help you
do the work that you need along with reading to
be self reflective. And so often they say, if you

(26:15):
want to hide something from a black man, put it
in a book. And so I believe that I've written
this in a way that it will make it so
black men, but not only black men, because I've had
women read this and said, this is the first book
that's going to help me save my marriage. I've had
people read this and say, you know what, this is
helping me reflect on my own life, and women men

(26:37):
of all races and ethnicities that have said this is
helping me reflect, and now using it to unclock my
gutter to move into greatness. And then using the workbook,
because the hour is all about rising. So you're rising,
you're rising, you're elevating, and now be the kings and
queens that we were determined to be. So you know,
that's really what it's all about.

Speaker 2 (26:57):
And what was that acronym again? It was gutter gutter,
Grieve your past, understand the wound, leave your past. Somebody
write that, grieve.

Speaker 3 (27:08):
Your past, gave your past, yep, understand, Understand your wound.

Speaker 2 (27:14):
Your wound, Tell the truth about your wound. Tell the
truth about your wound.

Speaker 3 (27:21):
Turn your pain into your purpose. Okay, equip yourself to
your purpose and then equip yourself and rise, y'all.

Speaker 1 (27:37):
This is some good to anybody else, feel like there's
some good stuff? Put a ten in the comments section. Actually,
I want you to just hashtag hashtag gutter to greatness.
Hashtag gutter to greatness, Equip yourself and rise. I'm putting
all of these points, and this is let me put
your name by here, doctor Paul Miller.

Speaker 2 (27:58):
There you go, so.

Speaker 1 (28:00):
Y'all can go back later and watch, replay or whatever,
share with your friends.

Speaker 2 (28:04):
And you have all of these points right here.

Speaker 1 (28:06):
We're gonna take a moment and just go to some
of the studio audience comments because I can see a
lot of comments flooding in. So maybe if you would,
doctor Pal, if you just answer some questions and address
any comments that's coming in, let's see. Yanna says, whoo
who excited to hear from you Doctor Miller.

Speaker 2 (28:25):
Hello, Yanna, how you doing? Thank you for listening.

Speaker 1 (28:28):
And Doctor Lotus Roche said, she's the one that referred
you to our show. And if you all have not
watched the Doctor Lotus for Schey ignites you show. It
is a global program, you definitely want to tune in.
And she has so many phenomenal great guests that come
on her platform. Doctor Lotus Roche said, yay, Doctor Miller,

(28:48):
doctor greatness. And she also says she's streaming in from
the Washington, DC area. Nora says, Hello, Hello, watching from Nigeria.

Speaker 3 (28:59):
Hey from Nigeria. Hey, I'll be in South Africa. I
want to get to Nigeria too. I believe there's a
lot of work to be done. I love supporting internationally.

Speaker 1 (29:08):
Yes, all right, Katherine de Leone says, clear the gutter
to let the blessings of rain flow.

Speaker 2 (29:17):
Hey Catherine, Yes, ma'am. Got to let it flow. Let
it flow smoothly so we can move this damage.

Speaker 1 (29:22):
That's right, Moving that damage, that's a key word, getting
that unclogged damage from being draining you and clogging your soul.
I'm so happy to know that doctor Miller became and
is becoming the man that he is designed to be
to open the floodgates to helping others. Absolutely, especially with
this being Men's Mental Health Awareness Month. I think that

(29:44):
is so important. I was reading about it and saying,
it's the unique challenges that men face when it comes
to our mental to your mental health, and men are
less likely than women to seek help for their mental
health problems. So I think what you're talking about. I
was so honored to have you on this particular momth
for this reason. Do you feel that what you're saying
connects with men and their mental health?

Speaker 3 (30:07):
Absolutely, and so you know they in our community is
off and pray it away, right, and so and there's
prayer is amazing, and I put God at the forefront
of everything that I do. But I will also say
I believe that God has put therapists here for a reason, right,
and as that's part of equipping yourself with the tools.

(30:27):
And so part of the tools was I saw therapy,
so I sawt therapy, and I put myself into therapy
to be able to start to work on a heel
and unpack and start to be able to tell the truth.
And so I could start to formulate what I needed
and get the right support. Often it's about finding the
right therapists and finding the right support and not being
ashamed to discuss that I talk about it because it's

(30:47):
always been taboo to have that conversation because you better
not talk about nothing outside of my house. You got
to that's right in my house or your circle, right,
But your circle doesn't have the tools to be able
to help you navigate some of those wounds because a
lot of times your circle has been through the same
type of wounds, so they need help too. So so yes,

(31:08):
there is an absolute love and appreciation for getting the
right help and support that you need.

Speaker 2 (31:14):
And you know, an honor to be talking.

Speaker 3 (31:16):
About this and mental health for months for men and
making sure that we're healthy here so that we can
give more of this to the people that we love
and be able to take care of our families and
our communities the way that it was really designed to be.

Speaker 1 (31:32):
Absolutely, I'm so honored that you're taking the time to
do this today, and I'm going to put here how
people especially men too, that want to connect with someone
that they feel like they can relate to and that
they can just reach out and learn and glean from,
how do they stay connected with you?

Speaker 2 (31:48):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (31:48):
So ww dot doctor Paul doctor p miller dot com.
It links to I believe almost all my sights there
and you can follow me there are Actually there's an
online course, so we I have an online course. If
you want to take the twenty one day challenge, you
can do it in a workbook or you can do
it online.

Speaker 2 (32:08):
And you can do that and that online course.

Speaker 3 (32:11):
You can connect through the doctor p Miller site and
you can connect and take the course and really start
working on yourself. You could burdges the books. You can
connect with me and we can talk and support. I
do speaking engagements. You need me to come out an
out led at your folks. I'm always willing to do that,
you know, and what you get is what you see
with me. So I'm very down to earth, very authentic

(32:33):
individual who brings this to the work. And I want
people to understand the passion and the heart that I
believe is needed to create change. And so that's what
we're really trying to do, is help change communities and
change individuals.

Speaker 1 (32:46):
That's good, and you are doing just that. And I
know on this platform alone, just so everybody knows, we
are actually streaming in one hundred and forty countries. So
the Kim Jacob Shall we reached number three recently on
CTR Media Network and so this was actually an older one,
but we reached number three on Roku in different places.

(33:08):
So I'm encouraging you to download the CTR Media Network
app on Roku and Android TV, fire tv and look
under the self Improvement channel. You'll find these episodes of
the Kim Jacobs Show right there. And so thank you
all because the only way we've even been able to
reach this level of accolades is because of your community support.

(33:29):
And I will ask you all because I do think
it's necessary to invite you to support our program each weekday.
We are here multiple times throughout the day and providing
wonderful guests like this gentleman that's here with us today
at doctor Paul Miller, and so I encourage you to
support us through any level of giving. It helps with

(33:50):
all of the different subscriptions, and it allows us to
be able to keep our programming coming into your home
to provide better balance.

Speaker 2 (33:56):
To your household.

Speaker 1 (33:58):
So please make sure you support the Kim Jacobs h
all right, so let's go back to some of these
studio audience comments. I see building communities around teachers. Congratulations, Norris,
said doctor Miller. And I told people, please ask your questions.
So let's see what questions you all may have.

Speaker 2 (34:16):
Great job.

Speaker 1 (34:16):
Catherine said that right there is deep whatever you were saying,
which everything that he said was deep.

Speaker 2 (34:22):
So there you have it.

Speaker 1 (34:23):
Yanna says, you become just like your trauma or the
opposite of it. That was one of your points. And
you said, oh, you retain your you can retrain your brain.
How do you recommend people retrain their brain? I would
love for you to talk about that a little more.

Speaker 3 (34:38):
Yeah, so a lot of times, so think about it,
and I think compare it to when you're trying to
build your muscles, right, and so you usually start off slow,
But it's about building consistency, it's about building new habits,
it's about building new rituals, new routines. So when you're training,
you don't just uh, you don't just change your exercise

(35:01):
routwein you also would change your eating habits, right, you
would also change what you do, what your behavior is.
You're also going to retrain how you do it. And
then you're going to start exercise consistently. You're gonna get
on a program. You're going to start exercising anywhere from
probably three to five times a week, and you're going

(35:22):
to start building your muscles, and you're going to start
off based on where you're at and your physical ability.
So the same thing goes for your brain. You you know,
and start off where you're at. Start off, but build consistency.
Start off changing some of your rituals and routines. Maybe
you have to change the people that you're around, Maybe
you have to start doing things to take care of

(35:44):
yourself more. And then you start working through things and
start doing things differently and forming new habits, new rituals
and routines. So like they say, like I said earlier,
so usually about your effort and not your ability. So
for example, think about it. I think in sports analogies
a lot of times. But someone who wants to get
better at playing basketball, right, if they practiced an extra

(36:07):
hour a day, that would be nine forty hour weeks
in a year according to Bob Procter. So that extra
nine forty hour weeks in a year, you're going to
get better at it. So if you want to become better,
maybe you start reading more, maybe you start writing more,
maybe you start reflecting. One thing for me that I
had to start doing was to make sure that I

(36:29):
prayed every day, right, And so for me, I take
quiet time every day, and I make sure that I
spend that time to pray and to listen and listen
to what those answers are, and then try to incorporate
those answers because I'm asking guy questions. I'm not you know,
I'm talking, but I'm also asking questions. And then I'm
trying to listen to what he puts in my spirit,
and so, you know what, but making sure that that's

(36:51):
a habit, ritual and routine that I don't want to
go without on a daily basis, and I find time
to make sure that I do that. So it's about
retraining that and forming new habits, new rituals, and new routines.

Speaker 2 (37:02):
That's awesome.

Speaker 1 (37:03):
Where there you have it, nour we can retrain our
brains and we can do it quite effectively. But even
in the process of implementing new strategies, especially if prayer
is one of them, taking that time to listen so
that you have the opportunity to capture what the answers
are for your life. This is really good stuff. Doctor
Lotus Rochet says that his twenty one twenty four day

(37:26):
challenge is powerful and it's changing lives for the better.

Speaker 2 (37:30):
Listen.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
If you have not QR scan this QR code, take
a moment right now and do it. Let's just take
two seconds here and grab your copy now from the
gutter to greatness. What do you want readers to ultimately
walk away learning when they pick this book up. You
said it say it's going to help save marriages. You

(37:53):
said that men are really learning and gleaning from this.
But what's some other things that you want people to
take away from your.

Speaker 2 (37:58):
Book that they're not alone?

Speaker 3 (38:01):
And when I say that that, especially often men, we
feel like we go through through things in silos and isolation,
and we feel like we don't have the ability to
talk about this with our peers or with with people
that around us. And so what I tried to do
is tell the truth, right and the good, the bad,

(38:23):
the ugly, and share it. And some of the stuff,
I'm sure it doesn't make me make me look good,
you know, and I'm okay, And I'm okay with that,
and I'm okay with it because that still was the
truth and it was where I was at. And so
when I say all of that, it's about that you
have people who are going through similar things and are
at similar points in their lives. And we all have

(38:44):
our gutters, right, And a gutter doesn't always mean the
neighborhood that you grew up in, because oftentimes people are
people say that you know you're you're young from the gutter, right,
But the gutter often is where you're at and that's
your mentality. So you know, we all have our gutters,
we all have our things holding us back, and we
all have our clocks. So it's about unpacking and unplugging

(39:07):
and realize that you're not alone. That me just this
regular guy from Rochester, New York, who is you know,
a guy's guy would say that at the end of
the day, all this stuff is okay, You're not alone.
We all go through this and you the more you
can come and tune and in touch with your emotions
and feelings and heal emotionally, spiritually, and physically, the stronger

(39:31):
you're going to be to move into your greatness. Sooner
you're going to eliminate those barriers.

Speaker 1 (39:35):
Very good, Very good, Angie angel I see you from
the DC area. Thank you for tuning in today as well.
Catherine de Leone says, make sure you grieve your past
and these are all tips that you shared understanding your womb.
Thank you so much for typing his points. Tell the
truth about your womb and your wounds because it's necessary
to be honest with where you are. Turn your pain

(39:56):
into your purpose, equip yourself and rise. And we also
hashtag gutter to greatness. Everyone should be hashtagging gutter to greatness.

Speaker 2 (40:06):
Oh wow, okay, so so much so.

Speaker 3 (40:08):
You know, Kim was interesting and I know you didn't
ask me this, but it's all my heart to talk about.
Right before the show, I had a conversation with a
good friend of mine, one of my best friends. I
was like an older brother and and I won't say
his name, but much older brother and not as good looking,
but right, so my older brother, and so we were

(40:29):
having this conversation because there was this job opportunity that
I presented him with, and it was this opportunity of
a lifetime because he's he's retiring from one spot, opportunity
of a lifetime to take on take on one of
the all boys locations, right and and so very qualified

(40:50):
to competent individual. And so he didn't have a lot
of time to really decide if if this was the
move for him or not. But in the spirit, he
knew God was telling them, you need to do this.
This is going to be a legacy, this is part
of what you're doing.

Speaker 2 (41:05):
And he let.

Speaker 3 (41:06):
And so we had a conversation this morning. He let
the distractions around him, and not distractions like negative or vices,
but distractions of like oh I really just want to retire,
or really do I want to do this? Do I
really want to do that? And those kinds of negative
influences not listen to what God was telling them, And
he decided not to move in that way, and then

(41:27):
he felt like it was you know, just really has
been eating out of spirit that he decided not to
listen because he was distracted. And so, like my message
to folks out there is, people, no matter where you're
at in life, there's always going to be the challenges, right,
and you're going to have these challenges, and there's going
to be distractions. And they might not be street life

(41:48):
distractions like I described earlier, or some of those other
things are external a failure or whatever that might be.
Sometimes those distractions are going to be things that are
very simple and right in front of you, make you
second guess and make you question your confidence and make
you question and that negative self talk around who you
are and feed into that.

Speaker 2 (42:08):
But if you can turn.

Speaker 3 (42:09):
That down and take a listen to God's voice and
hear what God is telling you, you're going to have
the greatest opportunity to move into your season of greatness
because you're going to be because those two things are
going to merge together. So when that personal and professional
merge together that and you start to heal that wound,
that's how you start to move into greatness. But it's
listened to that voice, and so my brother wishes is

(42:31):
that he would have listened to that voice. And so
it's a learning experience because we have free will and
choice and we don't always make the decisions that God
wants us to. And hopefully you know, where there's a will,
there's a way in the future. But again it's about
listening to that voice.

Speaker 1 (42:47):
That's good that you needed to say that, because there
are so many people that the voice is resonating in
their spirit and do this, do this, do this, do this.
But then it's something on the other side saying maybe
not maybe not right now, and talking yourself out of
the great opportunity that does exist for you.

Speaker 2 (43:06):
And because you don't know what.

Speaker 1 (43:07):
The future holds, sometimes people are very unsure uncertain about
what what is this going to look like if I
do take this leap of faith. But as you just said,
it's so important to not let yourself get discouraged by
a voice that does not have your best interest at heart.

Speaker 2 (43:23):
Clearly right right.

Speaker 3 (43:25):
Right, And it's really taking the time to tune in
and listen and not letting that cloud because like a
lot of times, if you think long, you think wrong.
You know, like God is talking to you talking to
your spirit and you know exactly what you're supposed to do.
And how many times for those people listening out there
do you choose the opposite? Do you choose and listen
to because a lot of times it's easier or it

(43:45):
feels better, and we and we listen to what we
want instead of what God wants, and you know what,
it just continuously holds us back and it prohibits us
from moving or shifting into where we're supposed to be
as part of that plan.

Speaker 1 (44:00):
Sooner, Well, this is good, okay, listen.

Speaker 2 (44:03):
I know.

Speaker 1 (44:04):
Also, you're the CEO of multiple organizations, one of charter
champions urban education, all kinds of different hats that you're wearing.
How are you personally balancing those roles and staying as
mission driven as you are? Because this shows about how
you're balancing life, and you're balancing it quite effectively.

Speaker 2 (44:22):
So so you know what it really is.

Speaker 3 (44:25):
One is the balance comes from all of my food
are in the same basket. So like, I'm not trying
to do things that aren't associated with each other. So
I'm not going to try to open a dental office
because that's not that's not you know, that would be
stressful and not my area, right, But everything I do
is kind of in the same basket and plays off

(44:47):
of each other and one thing is able to support
each other.

Speaker 2 (44:50):
And then it's also about trying to.

Speaker 3 (44:52):
Build a good team and build good people around you
to that can help and that support what you're doing
and make sure that you have the help that you need.
And then also it it really has to do with
maintaining that home life balance. And so after the divorce,
you know, it's kind of started life over and and
started life over, but keeping that balance and maintaining it

(45:14):
differently and kind of shutting off at certain times and
certain priorities. And and I actually started over with I
have a I have older kids, so I've grown kids,
and then I have a four year old too. So yeah,
COVID got me, got halty being fast during COVID, right,
So so got got a four year old and making

(45:38):
sure that that four year old on top of my
grown kids they're adults, but you know, making sure that
that four year old is a priority and that that
balance is met, and trying to keep that home life
balance with you know, with home spouse, baby and not
be able to shut that off and and not uh

(46:01):
not always go go go, even though my mind I
would never shut off because like, like my mind goes constantly.

Speaker 2 (46:09):
That's a good thing that your mind does go.

Speaker 1 (46:11):
But then you have to have like you say, you
have to say, Okay, we're.

Speaker 2 (46:14):
Gonna just take a break for a minute.

Speaker 1 (46:15):
And you have to take a break when you have
a four year old and you're your age, you definitely are.

Speaker 2 (46:22):
Like, oh my gosh, what's happening over here? Right? And
this girl is a lot. She is on the team terrorist,
so yeah she is, Yeah, she's a lot.

Speaker 1 (46:32):
Well, you know, and now you maybe have to ask
a whole different question because there's a lot of men.
I don't know that I have to look at the statistics,
but there are a lot of men probably in your
age category, and they're starting over with being a new
father to a young child and they have adult children.
What advice do you give people that's balancing fatherhood and
adult children and toddlers.

Speaker 3 (46:55):
Woo you know, man, it ain't my back hurt child,
so it ain't it ain't easy. But the truth of
it is, you know what, I think the way that
your balances is appreciating it more and so like I
actually appreciate this time around. So I've always been that
very active dad, I've always been that very present dad,

(47:17):
but I appreciate it more and I appreciate it from
the standpoint of where I am knowing these little moments
of how important they are. And even when I don't
want to do things, I still do it anyways, because
now the truth is, I'm tired, and now like I
want to get home, and I don't. I don't want
to do that, but I want to put on the

(47:40):
roller skates and go skating down the gut on the
driveway and and and all that. I don't want to
do that, but do I do it. Absolutely, And I
also appreciate it, you know, and I appreciate it like, wow,
you know I have instead of I have to, it's
I get to.

Speaker 2 (47:56):
You get to.

Speaker 1 (47:57):
That's what somebody type that all of you dads that
are tuning in or starting over when it comes to
having new children, you get to what an honor and
a privilege it is for you to get to be
able to support a new life and build a legacy
on someone that's going to be depending on you for

(48:18):
their future too.

Speaker 3 (48:19):
Absolutely, So that's that's part of the blessing there is,
as you know, so that I have to I get
to I got to remind myself of that. But you know,
so I'm not gonna be around here front and act
like it's always easy. But it's that mentality and mindset
of removing those complaints and removing some of those feelings
and replacing it with, you know, all of the good

(48:42):
and the opportunity and appreciating it and relishing in the good.

Speaker 2 (48:45):
That's good. Let's see.

Speaker 1 (48:47):
We had a couple more questions, and I see people
type paragraphs. So let me look like, if you get
off this show and don't read my story my paragraph
that I Angela said, change is a domino effect. This
can lead to significant consequence. This is both positive and negative,
depending on the initial change and the interconnectedness of the system.

Speaker 2 (49:08):
That was a great comment.

Speaker 1 (49:09):
Let's see doctor Lotus says, what is the most challenging
behavior that you've noticed with young boys when it comes
to staying in school and finding great mentors?

Speaker 2 (49:19):
Great question, doctor Lotus. You know that's a very good question.
This is a loaded question.

Speaker 3 (49:24):
Now, so you asked this, You're gonna get what you
asked for, doctor Lotus. So so one of the biggest
issues that I see with our young men, especially our
young men of color. So is what, and I'm going
to explain this is I will say mental weakness, and
I'm going to explain where I believe that comes from,

(49:46):
and then explain again how I believe we need to
retrain that in understanding that mentors need to understand this
even for ourselves. So often think about so with the
black woman. The black woman was designed and this is
no disrespect, but to raise her daughters and love her sons.
And so what does that mean?

Speaker 2 (50:03):
Right?

Speaker 3 (50:04):
So, if you look at what happens often the black mom,
and not all because a lot of mothers have broken
the cycle and are able to do things different. But
too many it's not, it's not, this is not monolithic,
but too many have still raised their daughters and loved
their sons. And what that means is is that they
are teaching their daughters how to cook, clean, take care

(50:26):
of the house, do everything they need to do, meet
their responsibilities, and have a career and do everything they
need to do. And then their sons they're loving to
a point of enabling them. And so and then what
happens is this goes back to slave times, right, And
so there's theories out there where, and this is where
you know it gets you know.

Speaker 2 (50:47):
You ask for it.

Speaker 3 (50:48):
So so where it gets deep is that. So there's
theories Willie Lynch theories. Some say he was real, some
say he wasn't real, right, whatever it is, But the
ideology is where when he came in to break a slave,
part of what he did was create a division. He
wanted to pull the black man out of the household.
He wanted to emasculate the man. He wanted to you know,

(51:12):
break the buck as much as he could. And then
with the woman, what they did was is in order
to keep their daughter safe, they taught her how to cook, clean,
take care of the household so that she wouldn't be killed, beaten,
sold or any other terrible things that happened during slavery.
But with the man, so her son wouldn't be killed, beaten,
or sold, she helped to love that son and make

(51:34):
him physically strong but mentally weak. And so what that
means is he could go out and be a good
field hand, but mentally he wouldn't have ever buck up
because she didn't want her to be killed, sold, or
anything else to happen to her son. And so what
that ended up transitioning into was often a level of
this mental almost complacency that would take what was given

(51:57):
to your handle because I'll ask a young black boy,
and I'll go up to them, and I'll ask this
question when I'm speaking to kids, which.

Speaker 2 (52:04):
I wouldn't do.

Speaker 3 (52:05):
But if I said, if I walked up to you
in almost any age, if I said and I smacked
you right now, what you're gonna do, and they're gonna say, well,
we're fighting.

Speaker 2 (52:14):
You know it's going down, it's happening.

Speaker 3 (52:17):
But why do you let these grades smack you? Why
do you let these that English class smack you? Why
do you let what happened, what somebody said about you
on the playground smack you? Why do you say, why
are you getting smacked so many times? And you are
not getting up from it and you're walking away with
your tailtup between your legs Versus when somebody physically assaults you, you.

Speaker 2 (52:37):
Are handling it right.

Speaker 3 (52:39):
And so what we have to do again, because mentally
is retrain the brand.

Speaker 2 (52:43):
We have to break the cycle.

Speaker 3 (52:44):
We have to we have to work with our boys
to implement this level of perseverance and mental toughness and
grit to be able to break these curses, retrain their
brains with new habits, new rituals, and routines. Because systemically,
they said, if we make a slave, we're gonna have
slaves for four hundred years. And if you look at

(53:06):
the statistics, one every three households is to single parent moms, right.
And if you look into the academics, black males are
failing at higher rates than any other population. If you
look at prisons, thirty seven percent of the prison populations
black males, but black males only make up thirteen percent
of the population in the world. So again when you

(53:29):
look at this, and it's just opposite for the white males,
where it's like forty percent of the world's made up
by white males, but only thirteen percent of the prison population.

Speaker 2 (53:39):
Right.

Speaker 3 (53:39):
And so all of these things were very purposeful. But
it's our job as parents and as mentors to work
to try to retrain our boys and our young ladies.
And I don't want to admit or leave our young ladies,
of course, but for our training our boys and train
them to be mentally strong and physically strong, in spiritual strong, right,

(54:01):
and give them the gifts that they need by not
enabling them and making sure that they have the ability
to succeed. And that's what we need from our mentors,
is working to help our boys and help them build
the mental fortitude that they need to succeed.

Speaker 2 (54:15):
That's good.

Speaker 1 (54:16):
That's really good good, I mean outstanding advice. And so,
doctor Lot is a great question. Thank you so much.
And I'm also wondering with you being the host of
this podcast, which was an award winning podcast for New
York and noteworthy on iTunes, what can listeners expect when

(54:38):
it comes to from the Gutter to greatness? Tuning into
your podcast, reading your book, taking the twenty one day
challenge is so many different aspects. What can people expect
when they tune into your podcast?

Speaker 3 (54:53):
Expect that you're going to hear and see people who
look and act and talk just like you, that are
going through the things have been through, the things that
you have been through, right, and then thinking about how
do you use that and where do you find where
do you see yourself in right? And usually before you
can start to see the changing, you have to see
yourself in at first right. So where do you see

(55:14):
yourself at it inside of it, and then utilize that
to make the changes that you need to make, and
utilize that to be the person that you're supposed to be,
and all of it, all of it is designed. Really
it's more to help you than it is to humbly
help me. You know, it helped me getting it out right.

(55:34):
And the way it helps me is I believe that
I'm designed and trying to help others, and so like
I feel good when I'm able to help somebody else.
So part of what I believe is is that this
is there and these items are put there so you
have the ability to kind of, like you said, this podcast,
this show here is in the self help category, and

(55:55):
so that's what I want to I want people to
help themselves because if you help yourself, that's the only
way you're going to be able to help others.

Speaker 1 (56:02):
Absolutely helping yourself, then you can help others because now
you've applied what you actually taught other people. What is
greatness to you? Because I know you talk about from
the gutter to greatness, and we talked a lot about
the gutter.

Speaker 2 (56:14):
What is greatness to you?

Speaker 3 (56:16):
So I've always wanted two things in my life, right,
and so and one is going to be like, okay,
the other one is going to be self serving. And
so the first one, what I believe is and greatness
to me is actually what I feel God has told
me that I need to do in this life is
to help others. And when I say that, it's also
in the terms of education. So for whatever reason, you know,

(56:37):
He's given me a gift or a talent or ability.
So I could walk into a school, I can see
exactly what's going on, and I could I could help
somebody who wants help to be able to support and
change their processes, to build systems their work and build
a successful school.

Speaker 2 (56:52):
Does do a lot of people want that advice? No,
but do they need it? Yes?

Speaker 3 (56:57):
Right, So I have that gift and that ability, but
I believe God has given me that. And what God
has told me instinctively here is if I do what
he wants and I help others and I help education,
and I do those things, that I'll have the second
thing that I want.

Speaker 2 (57:10):
I want to be wealthy doing it.

Speaker 3 (57:12):
So I was like, I don't feel that I need
to be broke afore because I'm in education, so and
you know, I'm not there yet, But I'm building that,
and I'm building those foundations, and I'm working towards that
to where I don't want to have to worry about
when I was young and we used to have to
take bottles back for toilet paper, or I used to
have to go into the store with the fool stamp

(57:33):
coupons where I was I thank you, Doug Loutas when
I was young, I would sit outside the store and
I would wait to because it wasn't on the cool
cards that they have now, it was on the funny money,
and I would wait until for the little girls to
walk out of the store so they wouldn't see me
pay with that or you know, because I was embarrassed

(57:53):
by it, and you know, and so now I wish
I had some fool stands, right, So.

Speaker 2 (57:58):
So shoot, like please pick me, I trade you.

Speaker 3 (58:03):
But but you know, I want to move into a
season of wealth. So helping people and wealthy is what
is greatness to me.

Speaker 1 (58:13):
Excellent answer. Okay, mental mental wellness can be overcome by
taking action. We don't have to stay there, is what
doctor Lotis said. And doctor Tina J. Ramsey I talked
about her earlier when I talked about CTR media network.
She's the founder of CTR Media Network. And so the
thank you doctor Tina Jay Ramsey for being here and

(58:34):
witnessing today this great guest, doctor Paul Miller.

Speaker 2 (58:38):
Yes, so glad to glad to be here. Thank you.

Speaker 1 (58:41):
Let me also give people another opportunity to make sure
that you scan that QR code and get your copy
of From the Gutter to Greatness.

Speaker 2 (58:51):
Get your copy today.

Speaker 1 (58:52):
If you know that you're getting a copy, go ahead
and put it in the comments section that I'm getting
my copy. I have gotten my copy. I have my copy.
I'm getting it right now. Now make sure that you
put it over in the comment section. We want to
see a significant boost in sales just today alone, even
though it's already bestseller on Amazon and everything, but we
still want to see a significant boost today, So make

(59:13):
sure that that happens. And then also just another really
side note. I see this and I want to let
you know I am a member of Delta Sigma thing.

Speaker 3 (59:24):
So you are my brother, Yes, ma'am always on your
Facebook page.

Speaker 1 (59:33):
I thought that was anyway, Okay, I want to also
before I close out, because we're getting ready to close
out here, but get your closing comment together and as
you're getting that. I want to play this quick bit
from the rugged roads of Rochester, New York. It's time
to get on your feet as we wow.

Speaker 2 (59:55):
Yeah, start in front of the bottom. Now we are
start in front of start in front of the bottom.
Now he is let him now my own.

Speaker 1 (01:00:08):
Him.

Speaker 3 (01:00:08):
He started in front of the bottom.

Speaker 1 (01:00:11):
That a guest speaker, your friend, university, my mama house.

Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
You don't give you every money that's trying.

Speaker 1 (01:00:18):
To achievement working at night, he held away. Call him that,
But I give you the ship, so you bring it
right back. I just think it's funny from the getta
the money millions to Yoda feed as were welcome, doctor Paul,

(01:00:41):
Paul Paul Miller. I'm doctor Paul Miller.

Speaker 2 (01:00:45):
M pat didn't started from the gutter.

Speaker 1 (01:01:03):
Now here, Doctor Paul Miller has been a tremendous pleasure
having you here today. What's a closing thought comment? How
do you want to leave your legacy?

Speaker 2 (01:01:15):
What do you want to be known for? Close us out? Oh,
you know that's a big one. You know what I think.

Speaker 3 (01:01:24):
If you want to think about what do you want
to be known for? You got to think about what's
your why? And what's your why?

Speaker 2 (01:01:30):
And what are you in love with? Right?

Speaker 3 (01:01:32):
And so what I'm in love with is a lot
different than what you love. In love is what you
love is? You know, love is a good feeling and
love is a strong feeling. Love is a lasting feeling.
But in love is that butterflies in your stomach, that
candy and flowers, then long walks on the beast, ladies
that y'all know, y'all like to take yes and a
little butterflies, And that's in love, right, And so in

(01:01:54):
love is a little bit different. And so I had
to come in touch with what am I in love
and what's my wife?

Speaker 2 (01:02:00):
What I'm in love with? And when I thought about it.

Speaker 3 (01:02:02):
Initially, my always my first answer, and your first answer
will probably be corny too. Your first answer is probably
all I love kids.

Speaker 2 (01:02:08):
I love that. I don't even like kids that much.

Speaker 3 (01:02:10):
I'm joking, you know, but I'm not in love with kids,
and appropriately, right, I'm not in love with is what
I'm in love with.

Speaker 2 (01:02:18):
I'm in love with winning. Winning is sexy to me.
Winning excites me.

Speaker 3 (01:02:23):
And when I say that I'm in love with winning,
I'm in love with winning so much that I want
to be able to win for our kids. If you
said to me, let's go outside and run backwards butt
naked in the winter time, I am going to want
to beat you. If you said, hey, let's go and
cook a meal, I want my meal to taste better

(01:02:45):
than yours. If you said to me I want to
run a school, I want my school to be better
than yours. If you said, hey, I want to teach
a lesson, I want my lesson to be better than yours.
At the end of the day, I want to win,
but I don't want to just win for myself. I
want to win for kids. I want to win, and
then I want to teach other people how to win.
And so what I am leaving people with is come

(01:03:07):
in tune and in touch with your why. Your why
is your purpose, and turn your purpose into your passion. Right,
and turn your purpose into your passion, and you'll never
go wrong because you'll always meet what you want to do.

Speaker 1 (01:03:21):
Yes, turn your purpose into your passion knowing that why,
and you will always be happy with the outcome of
what you chose to do. Doctor Paul Miller, I am
so honored that you took the time to be with
us today. We all became better people just because of
your presence and to stay connected with doctor Paul Miller.

(01:03:41):
You want to definitely visit doctor pmiller dot com. Doctor
pmiller dot com, I have audio podcast listeners as well,
so we need to make sure it's doctor p as
in Paulmiller dot com. Okay, make sure you all stay
connected with him and tune into all of the programs
that he's participating in. You'll find him speaking around the country.

(01:04:05):
You will find him speaking at your organization if you
go ahead and get them booked. You'll also find him
being able to be able to host his own podcast,
and so make sure you're tuning in. Thank you so much,
doctor lotus Chet for giving us this special blessing of
Paul Miller today, and thank you all in the studio
audience for tuning in and allowing us to bring balance

(01:04:25):
to your house, one household at a time, to this
whole world, one household at a time.

Speaker 2 (01:04:31):
Thank you so much, doctor Paul. Thank you for having
me appreciated.

Speaker 1 (01:04:35):
Thank you and everybody, thank you for tuning in. I
love all of you all and have a fantastic day.
See you tomorrow at it again right here on the
Kim Jacob Show. Bye, Fine, Thank you for tuning in
to today's episode of The Kim Jacob Show and for
being in the Virtual Studio audience. Your presence truly does
make a difference, and I look forward to you bringing
your friends and family to join you in the Virtual

(01:04:56):
Studio audience Monday through Friday at eleven o'clock am in
Standard Time. I look forward to seeing you and make
it a great day.

Speaker 2 (01:05:06):
M