October 9, 2025 • 40 mins
Discover how choosing peace in marriage can transform your perspective. Our recent trips showed us peace isn’t chased; it’s a deliberate choice. We share insights from their experience with ocean waves and city life. We learned how stillness and intentional choices can realign your faith, focus, and foundation in love and relationships. This episode offers practical reflections on personal growth and finding calm within life’s demands.
Top 3 Highlights:
Connect with Maurice and Kafi
Top 3 Highlights:
- Peace is a choice, not a pursuit.
- Stillness helps realign faith, focus, and life’s foundation.
- Prioritizing self and marriage strengthens connection and resilience.
Connect with Maurice and Kafi
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
There's something about the sound of waves that quiets the
noise in our soul. On that shore in Puerto Rico,
God reminded us that peace isn't something you chase, it's
something you choose. Let's talk about love and movement, the
(00:22):
way of God in life, experience to be.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Show love God.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Transford, Hello everyone, and welcome back to another episode. Hey Maurice, Hey,
how are you good? Good? Good? So we're still diving
in a little bit deeper on this trip that we
have taken and just reminiscing and and seeing how has
(01:00):
impacted us during this time. So we're talking about the
sound of the waves and how they can at times
sound noisy, but at other times they can quiet things down.
I don't know if it's part of the way that
our body is made up, that we're made up of
water as well, and that going to the ocean and
(01:24):
hearing the ocean is kind of a connection and it's
a drawing for us where it can kind of quiet
things down. I think, especially for me living somewhat in
the city and hearing the hustle and bustle of cars,
got driving by buses. We live near the airport, so
(01:45):
sometimes we hear the flights, but being there on vacation,
we didn't have a lot of those other noises, and
because our room faced the ocean, we heard mostly the
ocean winds and the waves as they were moving around
(02:11):
and hitting the sideline, the shoreline of our wonderful city
of San Juan. So you know, it was certainly a
time to just quiet ourselves down and be in awe
of all that God has for us and see him
(02:34):
and everything. So, Maurice, what do you think what was
What did the ocean and the waves do for you?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I think that for myself looking at the.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Ocean and learning how to be still, because I haven't always,
as you just stated, being from the city, the hustle
and bustle, the h the routine of life, you know,
cars driving fast, the the.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Planes, even though where we stay because they were doing tours.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
You can hear the plane and a helicopter like all
you know often, but but in all reality, looking at
the water and the calm, soothing motion.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Of it, one, it probably makes you feel like you're
back in the womb, you know. One.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
And then the ability to slow down, because I'm not
sure how many of you know, but I've.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Been going back and forth with this whole blood pressure thing.
And so.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Moments like that, when you're able to decompress and whatnot,
I really felt like my body, my mind, my energy
needed that quietness and needed.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
That that stillness.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
And you know, as I had stated, you know, just
just learning how to be still because I haven't always
been still. And then in that, because of not knowing
how to be still in the calm, my nerves and whatever,
I was reacting a lot. So in those moments you
(04:44):
got to think about, all right, how do I not
react but just respond to the moment, you know, be
able to be a little more again present, you know.
And so with that you learn how to rest a
little bit. And in that rest it realigns your faith,
your focus, and your foundation.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
More importantly is since the foundation that we have in love.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Now when we think about love, yes we're talking about
us in marriage, but sometimes you got to love yourself, right,
And so are you able to realign your faith, realign
your focus and your foundation and love with God, yourself,
your family, what you're trying to do in life, whatever
(05:32):
it is, how do you get yourself realigned.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
In those moments? And so and so, for myself it
was good.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Now let me go, let me back up for a moment,
because for those of you who knows, you know, it's
confiscated that we have been on ocean fronts in the past.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
This is our.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Third fourth ocean front vibe, maybe more, but but more,
especially when there has just been the two of us
though it's the second one where we were the first
one we were in Rehoboth and the water scared the
(06:24):
crap out of me, right, hearing the water, hearing the
crash in the middle of the night, whatever it is,
and you're not sure what's going on because you're so
used to being in Like, you know, a car is
screeching down.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
The street, right, you recognize the sound.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
You know you you recognize that. Listen, something as simple
as or crazy that you can hear a dog running
down the sidewalk for reason, How the word do you
know that? Because you know, you just used to certain
crazy sounds like that, you know, because you're around that.
But when you put yourself in an environment that you
(07:00):
are nowhere it used to m and sometimes those things
can make you very very very uncomfortable.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
I e. Why I thought somebody was trying to break into.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Our right because you were going back to what you're
not you're used to hearing or you know, have heard
in the past, like Okay, that sounds like somebody's at
a door, but not understanding like, oh no, that's that's
the ocean knocking at this, you know, the shorelines door,
you know type thing, not to somebody's at your physical dwelling.
(07:31):
Because I was, y'all, you know, And then I think
also again the wind coming off of the ocean and
for wherever it's coming from, and things like that. And
we've we've gone to ocean front hotels in the spring,
in the summer and in the fall. I guess we
(07:53):
haven't been there, I guess in the wintertime. So all
of those have different types of winds, right, all of
those the sun and the moon have a different reaction
to the water. So if the wind is howling, you know, hey,
it's going to get in somehow, and it's going to
(08:14):
allow the windows to rattle a little bit. It's going
to allow the door used to the hotel door to
rattle a little bit. And like I said, because you're
just not used to those things, your mind goes to, Okay,
somebody's trying somebody's at the door.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
Oh yeah, and y'all if y'all would have been there,
y'all would have been laughing because I put almost every
piece of friendship to the front door.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
So meanwhile I wanted the balcony door open.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Yeah. So yeah, it was. It was, Yeah, that was.
It was like, you know, it didn't help that out.
You know, I don't know if if my.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
Beverage you know, Oh yeah that's true that you know
a sister with some of that too, So you know, yeah,
I had the wrong.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yeah, your focus wasn't where it should be.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Guess totally.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Guess your foundation was not stable. Yes, yes, we had
some some issues with those few things.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
But and we're just being honest. Yeah, we're being honest,
and we're being clear and open with y'all. I don't
want y'all think like, oh, why the the Holy is people?
Not necessarily, No.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Not at all necessarily. But you said some you know,
interesting things as you were talking, Maurice, So tell us
more a little bit about you're talking about faith focused
and foundation and realigning those things and finding the rhythm
in it. You know, again, the going back to the trip,
(09:42):
there's a there's a rhythm in the ocean. You know,
as the waves are coming in, there was a rhythm there,
some days a little more still than others, and other days,
like you said, hey, you could tell a storm was
coming or had passed or whatever was going on further out,
it was pushing the waves in a little bit stronger.
(10:04):
But you know, talk a little bit about that rhythm,
the how it realigns with those things where you going.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
The rhythm is.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Almost like your heartbeat, right, you know, because if you
have an arrhythmia or something like that, you know, it
could take your breath away or it can.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
You know, kind of stop you in the tracks a
little bit.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
But then as you're listening to the water and just
how like I said, just how soothing could be because
if you think about it from a baby perspective, the
the heartbeat or whatever it is, like you know, they're
they're so used to mom's heartbeat. You know that it
helps them go to sleep and you know, all the
(10:52):
warmth and all that.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Type of stuff.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
So it makes you again think about Bible verses when
it talks about being in the buzzle and all, you know,
all those type of things. You know, and I think
those things when you start to assess it, and then
to compare it, not compare it. But I can't think
(11:14):
in the right way. I'm drawing a blank. But but
when you start combining the ideas together and you know,
and think about, hey, if this is what God's love
is like, you know, and this being close and being
wrapped up in his arms and all that type of stuff.
You know, God, I love you, God, I trust you.
(11:34):
You know my faith has been renewed in your power
and your spirit, whatever it might be.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
And in that now is your focus changing a little bit?
Speaker 3 (11:45):
Because now God, right, yeah, I mean I eat changing,
because because it can't get a little cloudy because of
the task and the mundane and all that type of
stuff in your regular life. And so so I think
that your focus has now shifted a little right now,
(12:05):
whether it's been either more clear. But then, be honest,
some people could be more cloudy because they'll be like, well, God,
you know you're showing yourself now, Well why didn't you
show yourself two weeks ago when we had some of
the most challenging weeks Because in all honestly, I'm again
being transparent with y'all. Right, before we left, there was
(12:28):
so many things going on that. It's like, and I
told this to cough, I'm like, listen, I'm even considering
canceling our trip, right, I was considering canceling because of
everything that was going on. And so in that deterrence
(12:49):
or whatever it is, how did God get glorified in
that and that thinking in that mindset? You know, was
he going to be able to show who he is
and what he is in our lives? Especially for what
I needed to see in those quiet moments, because it
was more important to see God's handiwork. And hearing the
(13:13):
stillness of the ocean. Now we did hear the storm part,
and y'all heard that in another episode, right, you know,
but but even in the stillness as confiscated as well
in the previous episode on how we're about ready to leave,
I'm getting dressed, I'm trying to make sure we packed up,
got all of our stuff together, whatever it is, and
confas like lood it up, you know, on the balcony,
(13:39):
you know, singing, you know Disney songs and everything else
through the ocean, you know, whatever it might have been,
you know, and ready to go get her little shell
and blow into it and blow truck you though, and
bring up a little mermaid and you know Poseidon and
all that time, you know all those things.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yes, it's sounds a little exaggerated, you know whatever, but
too much. But how encouraging is that?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
How relaxing is that because you're in a childlike state,
you're able to enjoy it. And if you're able to
be in your childlife state in God's presence, who is
your heavenly father, right, then how are you moving forward
in life? Are you now able to say, you know what, God,
because you have provided this, Because you have done this,
(14:29):
my level of focus, my level of go get it this,
whatever it might be for him, might have changed. But
because of what we had gone through in the past,
and I told you this, CoV in the past.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Well, I'm let me put you on my brain.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Why I said past twice because what we had gone
through prior to us leaving being the past. But if
I would have gone back years ago in the past,
those two weeks really would have caused me to cancel. Yes,
it really would have made me say whatever. And now
here's the issue. The issue in that is is that
(15:09):
now it changes the dynamic that Kappa and I have.
And now Kafa is now she's no longer focused on
being the wife, the you know, the trophy wife or
whatever whatever mindset she had going into you know, the
trip or whatever it is, like, Hey.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
I'm going with my husband and loud it out whatever
it is. Now she's like this big dummy you know. Now. Granted,
I want you to understand when I say dummy, it might.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
Not be the literal term. We use that word. Unfortunately
in the term of a nearment. It's our inside the joke.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Yeah, I would just be like, you know, I mean again, hey,
what needs to get fixed? Because again, the things that
would have held us back would have been things that
needed to be fixed. And then instead of, as Marisia's saying,
of being rejuvenated, we would have been repairing something, you know,
for all the things that were falling apart at that
(16:11):
particular time.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
But kind of like, but now, let's be honest though,
in that the stuff that was falling apart had nothing
to do with.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Us, I understand.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But we would have found a reason too.
Speaker 1 (16:20):
But people were coming to us for assistance. So again
that's why you were saying, hey, should we stay and
help them through these things that they have going on?
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Right?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
But because the trip was, you know, paid for it.
And even before the week before I think we had
even maybe a month before, had some other issues and
we had looked at okay, well, we still got time
to cancel this.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
I mean, And the reality is again confidence talking about
a month beforehand.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
So a month beforehand, I was still dealing with COVID.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Yes, you know, and so so understand that we get
back August the ninth from Atlanta. We're supposed to leave
September to twenty first, I believe That's what the date was,
and so literally every day felt like something else was
going on. We left on I'm sorry, September to twenty second,
(17:18):
we left, and so as we're looking at that date,
so from September to ninth to September twenty first, the
night before we leave, I'm still thinking, am I okay
enough to travel?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
You know? Is everyone else is going to be okay?
Or whatever it is?
Speaker 3 (17:38):
And so going into the trip, I was not settled.
I was not ready. It wasn't until in all honestly,
I had gone to sleep, and then when I woke
up in the morning, I'm just like, I'm on a mission.
We get to get on this bus. I shut it
all out and then you know, we got on a
(18:04):
bus again, different atmosphere, a different place. You know, now
you're in front of TSA, you know whatever, and then
you get on that.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Let's go back, like, what what was it that allowed
you to turn those negative thoughts off? What what helped you?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
I went to sleep in all honesty, I mean.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
When you went to sleep the night before, and you
went to sleep the night before that, you know what
I mean? So like, what was it?
Speaker 2 (18:34):
It was whatever it was for that night.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
I mean evidently God knew that, like, yo, you know what,
you're about to go and dwell with me, So cut
that crap off. And so he cut it off for me.
I guess you know, that's the best way I could explain.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Because it wasn't like you prayed about. It wasn't like
you had a hot you know, beverage. It wasn't like
you had a special spicy you know, it was nothing.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
It was literally, first of all, I was tired by
the time I went to sleep, you know, I went
to sleep, and then it's like, oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
The alarm went off one of the get up. Oh well,
I gotta go get a shower. I don't feel like
knowing us too early.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
And but but what happened is is that I think
moving mindlessly through all of that and then doing something again,
approaching things and doing things that I have.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
Never done before.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
So in all reality, taking a step into the unknown,
I guess took over my whole mindset, and that and
not considering what we were leaving, because again the challenges
that again that we were leaving wasn't even ours, you know.
(19:52):
And so our challenge was whether or not we're gonna
make this bust or not.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Our challenge was.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Do we really are we really going to make it
through this airport to go from one gate to another gate?
The reality was what is the weather really going to
be in our true destination because we've been looking and
hounding the time, you know, in the weather.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
What are we really going to get into? You know?
Speaker 3 (20:14):
And so I did not have a chance to really
contemplate on what was going on. It wasn't until we
were about really to come back. We all started to
come back. Yeah, and even with that, it still wasn't enough.
I mean it really didn't in all honesty. Since we've
been back and right now, by the time this airs,
(20:36):
you know, who knows it could be almost a month
later or whatever it is, you know, in our reality,
it still hasn't hit me because I understand and had
to get realigned in that moment. You know, Hey, you
know what I said to you, cough, I'm ready to
go back next month, Yes, right, cough, I want to
(20:57):
go back for hey, CoV what is it like being
at Christmas or New Year's there?
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Right? You know? You know, And so.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
It's that type of experience, you know, because when you're
away and you get to experience something else, see another
way of life, and then understanding that, as you have
stated in the opener, that peace isn't something that you chase,
it's something that you choose. And we chose to go, Yes,
(21:29):
we and we chose and in all honesty, and this
goes for some of you out there, especially for those
of you that will last minute, I'm going to encourage
each and every one of you to not wait.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
I'm gonna encourage you, you.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
Know, especially for those of you that want to take
these trips and you know that you're gonna get some
type of refund, those of you that are waiting for
refunds or whatever it might be, I encourage you to
take the time. Do some you to research right and
find out how to get some discounts or whatever it
might be, because there's a wealth of information out there.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
But book the trip.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
It's like they say, as far as content creators, take
the picture, snap the video, whatever it is, air the podcast,
whatever it is, book the trip, because if we had
not booked the trip. Now again, we didn't book the
trip at the last minute. This trip was booked for September.
(22:33):
It had to book at least four or five months prior,
so it wasn't like a last minute thing.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
It was already booked. And when it was booked, it
was paid for.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
So again, in order for us to reconsider anything, it's like, yo,
it's already paid for, you know, And so do we
really want to take the time to pull it back?
And my thought was, I don't want to do that
because and I'm glad that I made that decision to
(23:06):
book it and pay for it, because if I'm gonna
be honest with y'all, if it was like a layaway
like we did back of the day, right, if you
laid it away, you'd be like, you know what.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
I could pull the money out, right, we don't need that.
We could do.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Something else, all the other things that were going on.
It's like, oh, well, we can use that money towards
this other stuff, for all the things that other things
that were going on at that particular time that had
nothing to do with us. You know. So I think again,
as you're saying, hey, piece isn't Piece isn't something that
you chase. Is something that you choose. So you have
(23:49):
to choose yourself. You have to choose you, and you'll
be greatly rewarded. You know. I think chasing it, you know,
there's there's no end to it, there's no way to
capture it, you know, that type of a thing. But
when you you make that decision to do something, as
(24:12):
Marie said, hey, we made that decision. I think back
in April around his birthday, is like, all right, next
we surpassed your birthday. Now let's figure out what we're
doing for this twenty fifth anniversary. And we had gone
back and forth whether or not to have, like, hey,
a second honeymoon, or to have a second wedding reception
(24:35):
if you would renew maybe renewed vows, or just have
a big old party type of reception. And we had
gone back and forth on that, and especially as Maurice
is saying, hey, family members are getting older. We haven't
seen anybody in a while. I know my family, we
haven't had a family reunion in a long time. Marie. Sure,
family hasn't had anger family reunion even longer, longer since
(24:59):
he was like little nelsense. Yeah, so he's I guess
right in Yeah, so long time ago, you know, and
family haven't gotten you know, don't get together. And for
his family, they get together even less because there's not
that many of them. I guess where my family we
(25:20):
get together because we seem to have had a lot
of funerals or whatever, so we all kind of see
each other around funeral time. But still that's not everyone.
And we felt as so like that's not a good
reason to have the family get together, Like we would
love to have people get together for a happy moment.
So we thought maybe, you know, having a reception would
(25:42):
be a good idea. But then that's kind of chasing everybody.
That's kind of like trying to pull everybody in and
expecting them to be there because we could have chosen
a date and people are not going to be available
or whatever. But at the end of the day, we
chose ourselves, We chose our relationship, we chose our marriage,
(26:04):
we chose us, and I think it came out all
fur the better for all that we experienced, all that
we felt from the planning stage, like we were doing
research you know, on YouTube and on you know what,
(26:26):
different things, different sites, just trying to find out more
about the travel experience, what to take, what not to take,
what's okay you know, not going to be your flag
and things like that.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
So if we know, we got a check more more
that we desired.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
Yeah, got our bags, had to get a little special
special attention, but again a learning that we learned, and uh,
we'll travel differently moving forward. But through it all, I
think focusing on as Maurice is always saying, you know,
(27:08):
looking at the man in the mirror, focusing on yourself,
understanding what it is that you really want, what you
really need. Yes, having a family reunion type reception would
have been great, but is that what we really wanted?
Is that what we really needed was that something that
(27:28):
we were trying to then gift everybody else. So we
in this we chose to slow down, not to chase,
but to focus on ourselves. And I think the reward
was so so much greater, and we can plan a
party some other time.
Speaker 3 (27:48):
And I think that, in all honesty that what you
just explained is the foundational part and love again, as
I say, you gott choose yourself, and and then in
(28:09):
choosing yourself, you have to understand what's really truly important
to you.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Again, sometimes we lose track of that. Sometimes we lose track.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Of the basics as well. Instead of being so grandioso
and hey, look at me or whatever it is, because
I'm in beyondes with y'all this trip. I try to
keep its so low key as possible before we left,
(28:37):
where some people be like.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
Yo, guess what I'm getting readydo yo?
Speaker 3 (28:40):
Whatever it is, right, you know, But again that's not
who I am. I'm not a showy person like that,
you know. But I believe that this was something that
we needed and that we needed to again reset and
understand and to realign and.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Refocus with what God has at once for us.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Because as soon as we got back, not soon, but
since we've been back, our energy, our perspective, what we're
working towards is not the same before we left.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
It really isn't the same.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
And our conversations are not the same, same topics, but
the way the conversation goes is not the same. Not
even the same topics, but similar topics or similar ideas
or topics.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I don't know how you want to work, but even
things that are similar, you know that, you know, we're
bringing up again, Like you said, there was an issue
before we left. We came back home. The issue is
still there, but being away, as you said, the rhythm
has changed. When we went away, you know, our rhythm
(29:59):
of our connection, our in sincness changed. So now we
face these other issues differently because our rhythm, you know,
is now more in tuned and connected with one another.
Our rhythm is now more connected with God. So the
(30:19):
things that you know testimony, the things that used to
bother me don't bother me no more, you know whatever.
So there has been a change in that capacity of
things that would kind of get underneath of our skin
or bother us or keep us up late at night.
(30:42):
It's just like, oh, okay, you know, we'll ask a
couple of questions and kind of keep it moving from there.
But it doesn't have the same hold the way that
it used to before the trip. And again I don't know,
y'all that's been supposed to rub off and we're out
later on. Just like my son Tan, I'm not gonna
(31:03):
live with it forever. It is gonna, you know, go away.
So I don't know if this little piece that we
have will kind of phase out after a while.
Speaker 3 (31:13):
I can't say that I will because for myself anyway,
and because you'll constantly work at it, right, you know,
you're constantly be like, all right, I can't allow you
or this situation to steal my peace and my joy,
you know, because if I allow that, who wins in
that the enemy wins and I'm the victor in that situation.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Now is you're gonna tempt me and want to come
at me and.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Whatever it is? All right, that's cool. I got you,
because here's a reality. You've been doing it for so long,
you know, to some degree, you're kind of expecting it,
you get what I mean. So it's like it's not
gonna be a surprise, you know, because there's so many
different ways you've come along and you present in your face,
in your head or whatever it is, you know, So
(32:06):
I'm not going to say and say, well, what else
can you do?
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Like bring it to me. I ain't that bold, you
get what I'm saying. I'm not doing that, you.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
Know, But the reality is is that, yo, do like
you know, Yeah, You've had your moments, right, you know,
because we're all human, right, you had your moments, you know.
But I'm looking forward to having more moments that I
just experienced in on not just this trip, but a
trip that we took a couple of years ago for
my birthday. By going to those places to be able
(32:34):
to see God is real, to see that you know,
what He has done in and around our lives, who
the people that He's touched, not just recently, for our
whole life and reality how much God has protected us,
you know, good, bad, or indifferent, you know, because of
(32:55):
our decisions, right.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
And also understanding.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
That all the other things that would have continue to
fester and to continue to.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Hold us back or whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I say the Coppro now like it doesn't bother me,
you know, and to some degree it doesn't bother me
to a point where I'm like, Yo, like Malic's like
what attitude, Like do you really have right now? Like
who is this person? Like you changed like that much?
You know, like really like that much because God has
been a waymaker throughout all of this. And there are
(33:36):
conversations or even thoughts that I can even just tell.
I could say the cop like YO, in this particular moment,
I know I would have responded that way. I know
I would have said this. I know I would have
said that, and I could see where things really would
have went left. And I'm not saying it to you
(33:57):
to bring it up and to talk about it up
to you to say, you know what, I allow these
moments to get to me. I allowed these topics or
these ideas to get to me, and I allow the
enemy to use me in those moments to get to
both of us. Right, And so here's the reality. I'm
(34:19):
acknowledging that. But this is how we won over that.
This is how we're the victor's over that. And how
when we sit here holding the hands on this slippery
behind floor in a hotel in Puerto Rico, because that
was an ice skating rink in our hotel room, that
as we sit here and stand here and look over
(34:39):
over this ocean, how God's presence is here with us
in this quiet time or or even taking a moment
now we're talking about the ocean and just that stillness
and that you know, we're slowing down of seeing that,
(34:59):
but even in the moment of being in the land
and being in a high rise and being able to
feel like you're closer to Heaven a little bit more right,
you know. And so just like God, look at what
you have been able to do with your people's hands,
but what they've been able to build and what they've
been able to create, you know, and that no matter
what the situation is, that you have blessed us beyond measure,
(35:22):
you know, And so understand that and respecting the fact
that when I say God, yes, cope and I are Christian,
but I also understand and respect each and every one
of you that are possibly listening that are not Christian.
That's why we're just saying God. I'm not saying, oh yeah, Jesus,
you know, whatever it is. I'm understanding that God is
(35:44):
for everybody, is not you know, a particular religion, is
not a particular faith, is not a particular walk of
life or whatever it is. We understand that there's a
lot of you that are listening that are don't necessarily
believe in what we believe in.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
But you listen to what we're bringing out.
Speaker 3 (36:01):
And so whether you are you know, of the Islamic
faith and you feel like Allah.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Has blessed you, you.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Know that you believe that a Li has done marvelous
works and talk to you whatever it might be, you know,
I understand.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
I respect that because here's the other part of that too.
Speaker 3 (36:19):
I got family members that are in that faith, got
family members possibly that are Jewish.
Speaker 2 (36:24):
You know that we read the Torah or whatever it is,
you know. So so.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
I just had to put that out there because you
could see God and all of that, you know, and
how certain things in life right now is really causing
us more and more to become better connected to and
to say, you know what, we need to quiet down
(36:52):
this in this world that's full of notifications and noises
and all that type of stuff, and how that moment
isis can probably feel uncomfortable, but we have to understand
that slowing down together create space for God, for us
to hear his voice and to be present in that moment.
(37:14):
And that also in that we could slow down just
be able to hear what God has to say. How
does that manifest in our hearts and how we deal
with one another.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
You know.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
So, I just want each and every one of you
to know that, you know, yes, Coffin and I have
a renewed life and a renewed outlook on things or
whatever it is, and we want to spread it amongst
each and every one.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Of you, you know.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
But it has truly changed the way we view each other,
how we react and respond to one another, because we
definitely don't get the same energy that we might have
in the past. Yeh we it's definitely not like that.
And even some of the harder questions or conversations that
(38:05):
in the past that we've had recently.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Would have gone totally different. Give us two months ago.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
Let alone two years ago or twenty years ago if
we asked the same question.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
You know.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
Again, it's about how you respond and react. Which one
are you doing and how do you.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Receive it right? You know so, because you know there
are times that you ask questions and I receive it
with you know, tainted lenses and you know, cotton in
my ears, Like you know, there's other things that can
block it, whether it's my own personal past or again,
(38:49):
like you said, hey, our past can sometimes alter how
I hear the question or hear the comment so how
I receive it? And then and like you said, for
how things are all the reads as you said before,
and how how how we're handling all those things. And
(39:11):
it's it's not easy. There's no quick fix to marriage.
There's no do this and add this and stir that
makes a happy marriage. Sorry, that's not that, ain't it.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
You know?
Speaker 1 (39:29):
It's certainly step by step, day by day. You know,
individuals too, imperfect individuals coming together trying to make something
you know good out of it. So I'm not perfect.
I've said that before. So there's days and there's moments,
(39:50):
and there's times that my imperfection it gleams, you know
what I mean. But to God be to glory. I'm
learning and I'm getting better day by day, and this
thing called marriage is helping me along the way. So
(40:10):
we thank you so so much everyone for listening. We
hope that you would share your thoughts, your comments with us.
We'd love to see and hear from you. Thank you
very much. We'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Thanks for tuning in to another episode of a No
Fruit podcast, where we bring you fruitful conversations, ripen wisdom
and love that's deeply rooted. If you enjoyed this episode,
don't forget to subscribe, leave us a review, and share
it with someone.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Who could use a little inspiration in their death.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Until next time, stay rooted in love and remember every
seed you plant today shapes the fruit of tomorrow.
There's something about the sound of waves that quiets the
noise in our soul. On that shore in Puerto Rico,
God reminded us that peace isn't something you chase, it's
something you choose. Let's talk about love and movement, the
(00:22):
way of God in life, experience to be.
Speaker 2 (00:27):
Show love God.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Transford, Hello everyone, and welcome back to another episode. Hey Maurice, Hey,
how are you good? Good? Good? So we're still diving
in a little bit deeper on this trip that we
have taken and just reminiscing and and seeing how has
(01:00):
impacted us during this time. So we're talking about the
sound of the waves and how they can at times
sound noisy, but at other times they can quiet things down.
I don't know if it's part of the way that
our body is made up, that we're made up of
water as well, and that going to the ocean and
(01:24):
hearing the ocean is kind of a connection and it's
a drawing for us where it can kind of quiet
things down. I think, especially for me living somewhat in
the city and hearing the hustle and bustle of cars,
got driving by buses. We live near the airport, so
(01:45):
sometimes we hear the flights, but being there on vacation,
we didn't have a lot of those other noises, and
because our room faced the ocean, we heard mostly the
ocean winds and the waves as they were moving around
(02:11):
and hitting the sideline, the shoreline of our wonderful city
of San Juan. So you know, it was certainly a
time to just quiet ourselves down and be in awe
of all that God has for us and see him
(02:34):
and everything. So, Maurice, what do you think what was
What did the ocean and the waves do for you?
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I think that for myself looking at the.
Speaker 3 (02:52):
Ocean and learning how to be still, because I haven't always,
as you just stated, being from the city, the hustle
and bustle, the h the routine of life, you know,
cars driving fast, the the.
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Planes, even though where we stay because they were doing tours.
Speaker 3 (03:20):
You can hear the plane and a helicopter like all
you know often, but but in all reality, looking at
the water and the calm, soothing motion.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Of it, one, it probably makes you feel like you're
back in the womb, you know. One.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
And then the ability to slow down, because I'm not
sure how many of you know, but I've.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Been going back and forth with this whole blood pressure thing.
And so.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
Moments like that, when you're able to decompress and whatnot,
I really felt like my body, my mind, my energy
needed that quietness and needed.
Speaker 2 (04:17):
That that stillness.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
And you know, as I had stated, you know, just
just learning how to be still because I haven't always
been still. And then in that, because of not knowing
how to be still in the calm, my nerves and whatever,
I was reacting a lot. So in those moments you
(04:44):
got to think about, all right, how do I not
react but just respond to the moment, you know, be
able to be a little more again present, you know.
And so with that you learn how to rest a
little bit. And in that rest it realigns your faith,
your focus, and your foundation.
Speaker 2 (05:03):
More importantly is since the foundation that we have in love.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Now when we think about love, yes we're talking about
us in marriage, but sometimes you got to love yourself, right,
And so are you able to realign your faith, realign
your focus and your foundation and love with God, yourself,
your family, what you're trying to do in life, whatever
(05:32):
it is, how do you get yourself realigned.
Speaker 2 (05:36):
In those moments? And so and so, for myself it
was good.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
Now let me go, let me back up for a moment,
because for those of you who knows, you know, it's
confiscated that we have been on ocean fronts in the past.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
This is our.
Speaker 3 (06:03):
Third fourth ocean front vibe, maybe more, but but more,
especially when there has just been the two of us
though it's the second one where we were the first
one we were in Rehoboth and the water scared the
(06:24):
crap out of me, right, hearing the water, hearing the
crash in the middle of the night, whatever it is,
and you're not sure what's going on because you're so
used to being in Like, you know, a car is
screeching down.
Speaker 1 (06:37):
The street, right, you recognize the sound.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
You know you you recognize that. Listen, something as simple
as or crazy that you can hear a dog running
down the sidewalk for reason, How the word do you
know that? Because you know, you just used to certain
crazy sounds like that, you know, because you're around that.
But when you put yourself in an environment that you
(07:00):
are nowhere it used to m and sometimes those things
can make you very very very uncomfortable.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
I e. Why I thought somebody was trying to break into.
Speaker 1 (07:10):
Our right because you were going back to what you're
not you're used to hearing or you know, have heard
in the past, like Okay, that sounds like somebody's at
a door, but not understanding like, oh no, that's that's
the ocean knocking at this, you know, the shorelines door,
you know type thing, not to somebody's at your physical dwelling.
(07:31):
Because I was, y'all, you know, And then I think
also again the wind coming off of the ocean and
for wherever it's coming from, and things like that. And
we've we've gone to ocean front hotels in the spring,
in the summer and in the fall. I guess we
(07:53):
haven't been there, I guess in the wintertime. So all
of those have different types of winds, right, all of
those the sun and the moon have a different reaction
to the water. So if the wind is howling, you know, hey,
it's going to get in somehow, and it's going to
(08:14):
allow the windows to rattle a little bit. It's going
to allow the door used to the hotel door to
rattle a little bit. And like I said, because you're
just not used to those things, your mind goes to, Okay,
somebody's trying somebody's at the door.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
Oh yeah, and y'all if y'all would have been there,
y'all would have been laughing because I put almost every
piece of friendship to the front door.
Speaker 2 (08:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
So meanwhile I wanted the balcony door open.
Speaker 2 (08:41):
Yeah. So yeah, it was. It was, Yeah, that was.
It was like, you know, it didn't help that out.
You know, I don't know if if my.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
Beverage you know, Oh yeah that's true that you know
a sister with some of that too, So you know, yeah,
I had the wrong.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yeah, your focus wasn't where it should be.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
Guess totally.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
Guess your foundation was not stable. Yes, yes, we had
some some issues with those few things.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
But and we're just being honest. Yeah, we're being honest,
and we're being clear and open with y'all. I don't
want y'all think like, oh, why the the Holy is people?
Not necessarily, No.
Speaker 1 (09:18):
Not at all necessarily. But you said some you know,
interesting things as you were talking, Maurice, So tell us
more a little bit about you're talking about faith focused
and foundation and realigning those things and finding the rhythm
in it. You know, again, the going back to the trip,
(09:42):
there's a there's a rhythm in the ocean. You know,
as the waves are coming in, there was a rhythm there,
some days a little more still than others, and other days,
like you said, hey, you could tell a storm was
coming or had passed or whatever was going on further out,
it was pushing the waves in a little bit stronger.
(10:04):
But you know, talk a little bit about that rhythm,
the how it realigns with those things where you going.
Speaker 2 (10:10):
The rhythm is.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
Almost like your heartbeat, right, you know, because if you
have an arrhythmia or something like that, you know, it
could take your breath away or it can.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
You know, kind of stop you in the tracks a
little bit.
Speaker 3 (10:29):
But then as you're listening to the water and just
how like I said, just how soothing could be because
if you think about it from a baby perspective, the
the heartbeat or whatever it is, like you know, they're
they're so used to mom's heartbeat. You know that it
helps them go to sleep and you know, all the
(10:52):
warmth and all that.
Speaker 2 (10:52):
Type of stuff.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
So it makes you again think about Bible verses when
it talks about being in the buzzle and all, you know,
all those type of things. You know, and I think
those things when you start to assess it, and then
to compare it, not compare it. But I can't think
(11:14):
in the right way. I'm drawing a blank. But but
when you start combining the ideas together and you know,
and think about, hey, if this is what God's love
is like, you know, and this being close and being
wrapped up in his arms and all that type of stuff.
You know, God, I love you, God, I trust you.
(11:34):
You know my faith has been renewed in your power
and your spirit, whatever it might be.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
And in that now is your focus changing a little bit?
Speaker 3 (11:45):
Because now God, right, yeah, I mean I eat changing,
because because it can't get a little cloudy because of
the task and the mundane and all that type of
stuff in your regular life. And so so I think
that your focus has now shifted a little right now,
(12:05):
whether it's been either more clear. But then, be honest,
some people could be more cloudy because they'll be like, well, God,
you know you're showing yourself now, Well why didn't you
show yourself two weeks ago when we had some of
the most challenging weeks Because in all honestly, I'm again
being transparent with y'all. Right, before we left, there was
(12:28):
so many things going on that. It's like, and I
told this to cough, I'm like, listen, I'm even considering
canceling our trip, right, I was considering canceling because of
everything that was going on. And so in that deterrence
(12:49):
or whatever it is, how did God get glorified in
that and that thinking in that mindset? You know, was
he going to be able to show who he is
and what he is in our lives? Especially for what
I needed to see in those quiet moments, because it
was more important to see God's handiwork. And hearing the
(13:13):
stillness of the ocean. Now we did hear the storm part,
and y'all heard that in another episode, right, you know,
but but even in the stillness as confiscated as well
in the previous episode on how we're about ready to leave,
I'm getting dressed, I'm trying to make sure we packed up,
got all of our stuff together, whatever it is, and
confas like lood it up, you know, on the balcony,
(13:39):
you know, singing, you know Disney songs and everything else
through the ocean, you know, whatever it might have been,
you know, and ready to go get her little shell
and blow into it and blow truck you though, and
bring up a little mermaid and you know Poseidon and
all that time, you know all those things.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Yes, it's sounds a little exaggerated, you know whatever, but
too much. But how encouraging is that?
Speaker 3 (14:08):
How relaxing is that because you're in a childlike state,
you're able to enjoy it. And if you're able to
be in your childlife state in God's presence, who is
your heavenly father, right, then how are you moving forward
in life? Are you now able to say, you know what, God,
because you have provided this, Because you have done this,
(14:29):
my level of focus, my level of go get it this,
whatever it might be for him, might have changed. But
because of what we had gone through in the past,
and I told you this, CoV in the past.
Speaker 2 (14:46):
Well, I'm let me put you on my brain.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Why I said past twice because what we had gone
through prior to us leaving being the past. But if
I would have gone back years ago in the past,
those two weeks really would have caused me to cancel. Yes,
it really would have made me say whatever. And now
here's the issue. The issue in that is is that
(15:09):
now it changes the dynamic that Kappa and I have.
And now Kafa is now she's no longer focused on
being the wife, the you know, the trophy wife or
whatever whatever mindset she had going into you know, the
trip or whatever it is, like, Hey.
Speaker 2 (15:28):
I'm going with my husband and loud it out whatever
it is. Now she's like this big dummy you know. Now. Granted,
I want you to understand when I say dummy, it might.
Speaker 3 (15:39):
Not be the literal term. We use that word. Unfortunately
in the term of a nearment. It's our inside the joke.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Yeah, I would just be like, you know, I mean again, hey,
what needs to get fixed? Because again, the things that
would have held us back would have been things that
needed to be fixed. And then instead of, as Marisia's saying,
of being rejuvenated, we would have been repairing something, you know,
for all the things that were falling apart at that
(16:11):
particular time.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
But kind of like, but now, let's be honest though,
in that the stuff that was falling apart had nothing
to do with.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Us, I understand.
Speaker 2 (16:19):
But we would have found a reason too.
Speaker 1 (16:20):
But people were coming to us for assistance. So again
that's why you were saying, hey, should we stay and
help them through these things that they have going on?
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Right?
Speaker 1 (16:33):
But because the trip was, you know, paid for it.
And even before the week before I think we had
even maybe a month before, had some other issues and
we had looked at okay, well, we still got time
to cancel this.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
I mean, And the reality is again confidence talking about
a month beforehand.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
So a month beforehand, I was still dealing with COVID.
Speaker 3 (16:55):
Yes, you know, and so so understand that we get
back August the ninth from Atlanta. We're supposed to leave
September to twenty first, I believe That's what the date was,
and so literally every day felt like something else was
going on. We left on I'm sorry, September to twenty second,
(17:18):
we left, and so as we're looking at that date,
so from September to ninth to September twenty first, the
night before we leave, I'm still thinking, am I okay
enough to travel?
Speaker 2 (17:34):
You know? Is everyone else is going to be okay?
Or whatever it is?
Speaker 3 (17:38):
And so going into the trip, I was not settled.
I was not ready. It wasn't until in all honestly,
I had gone to sleep, and then when I woke
up in the morning, I'm just like, I'm on a mission.
We get to get on this bus. I shut it
all out and then you know, we got on a
(18:04):
bus again, different atmosphere, a different place. You know, now
you're in front of TSA, you know whatever, and then
you get on that.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Let's go back, like, what what was it that allowed
you to turn those negative thoughts off? What what helped you?
Speaker 2 (18:26):
I went to sleep in all honesty, I mean.
Speaker 1 (18:30):
When you went to sleep the night before, and you
went to sleep the night before that, you know what
I mean? So like, what was it?
Speaker 2 (18:34):
It was whatever it was for that night.
Speaker 3 (18:37):
I mean evidently God knew that, like, yo, you know what,
you're about to go and dwell with me, So cut
that crap off. And so he cut it off for me.
I guess you know, that's the best way I could explain.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
Because it wasn't like you prayed about. It wasn't like
you had a hot you know, beverage. It wasn't like
you had a special spicy you know, it was nothing.
Speaker 3 (18:55):
It was literally, first of all, I was tired by
the time I went to sleep, you know, I went
to sleep, and then it's like, oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (19:04):
The alarm went off one of the get up. Oh well,
I gotta go get a shower. I don't feel like
knowing us too early.
Speaker 3 (19:17):
And but but what happened is is that I think
moving mindlessly through all of that and then doing something again,
approaching things and doing things that I have.
Speaker 2 (19:30):
Never done before.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
So in all reality, taking a step into the unknown,
I guess took over my whole mindset, and that and
not considering what we were leaving, because again the challenges
that again that we were leaving wasn't even ours, you know.
(19:52):
And so our challenge was whether or not we're gonna
make this bust or not.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Our challenge was.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
Do we really are we really going to make it
through this airport to go from one gate to another gate?
The reality was what is the weather really going to
be in our true destination because we've been looking and
hounding the time, you know, in the weather.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
What are we really going to get into? You know?
Speaker 3 (20:14):
And so I did not have a chance to really
contemplate on what was going on. It wasn't until we
were about really to come back. We all started to
come back. Yeah, and even with that, it still wasn't enough.
I mean it really didn't in all honesty. Since we've
been back and right now, by the time this airs,
(20:36):
you know, who knows it could be almost a month
later or whatever it is, you know, in our reality,
it still hasn't hit me because I understand and had
to get realigned in that moment. You know, Hey, you
know what I said to you, cough, I'm ready to
go back next month, Yes, right, cough, I want to
(20:57):
go back for hey, CoV what is it like being
at Christmas or New Year's there?
Speaker 2 (21:03):
Right? You know? You know, And so.
Speaker 3 (21:06):
It's that type of experience, you know, because when you're
away and you get to experience something else, see another
way of life, and then understanding that, as you have
stated in the opener, that peace isn't something that you chase,
it's something that you choose. And we chose to go, Yes,
(21:29):
we and we chose and in all honesty, and this
goes for some of you out there, especially for those
of you that will last minute, I'm going to encourage
each and every one of you to not wait.
Speaker 2 (21:43):
I'm gonna encourage you, you.
Speaker 3 (21:45):
Know, especially for those of you that want to take
these trips and you know that you're gonna get some
type of refund, those of you that are waiting for
refunds or whatever it might be, I encourage you to
take the time. Do some you to research right and
find out how to get some discounts or whatever it
might be, because there's a wealth of information out there.
Speaker 2 (22:09):
But book the trip.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
It's like they say, as far as content creators, take
the picture, snap the video, whatever it is, air the podcast,
whatever it is, book the trip, because if we had
not booked the trip. Now again, we didn't book the
trip at the last minute. This trip was booked for September.
(22:33):
It had to book at least four or five months prior,
so it wasn't like a last minute thing.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
It was already booked. And when it was booked, it
was paid for.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
So again, in order for us to reconsider anything, it's like, yo,
it's already paid for, you know, And so do we
really want to take the time to pull it back?
And my thought was, I don't want to do that
because and I'm glad that I made that decision to
(23:06):
book it and pay for it, because if I'm gonna
be honest with y'all, if it was like a layaway
like we did back of the day, right, if you
laid it away, you'd be like, you know what.
Speaker 2 (23:22):
I could pull the money out, right, we don't need that.
We could do.
Speaker 1 (23:27):
Something else, all the other things that were going on.
It's like, oh, well, we can use that money towards
this other stuff, for all the things that other things
that were going on at that particular time that had
nothing to do with us. You know. So I think again,
as you're saying, hey, piece isn't Piece isn't something that
you chase. Is something that you choose. So you have
(23:49):
to choose yourself. You have to choose you, and you'll
be greatly rewarded. You know. I think chasing it, you know,
there's there's no end to it, there's no way to
capture it, you know, that type of a thing. But
when you you make that decision to do something, as
(24:12):
Marie said, hey, we made that decision. I think back
in April around his birthday, is like, all right, next
we surpassed your birthday. Now let's figure out what we're
doing for this twenty fifth anniversary. And we had gone
back and forth whether or not to have, like, hey,
a second honeymoon, or to have a second wedding reception
(24:35):
if you would renew maybe renewed vows, or just have
a big old party type of reception. And we had
gone back and forth on that, and especially as Maurice
is saying, hey, family members are getting older. We haven't
seen anybody in a while. I know my family, we
haven't had a family reunion in a long time. Marie. Sure,
family hasn't had anger family reunion even longer, longer since
(24:59):
he was like little nelsense. Yeah, so he's I guess
right in Yeah, so long time ago, you know, and
family haven't gotten you know, don't get together. And for
his family, they get together even less because there's not
that many of them. I guess where my family we
(25:20):
get together because we seem to have had a lot
of funerals or whatever, so we all kind of see
each other around funeral time. But still that's not everyone.
And we felt as so like that's not a good
reason to have the family get together, Like we would
love to have people get together for a happy moment.
So we thought maybe, you know, having a reception would
(25:42):
be a good idea. But then that's kind of chasing everybody.
That's kind of like trying to pull everybody in and
expecting them to be there because we could have chosen
a date and people are not going to be available
or whatever. But at the end of the day, we
chose ourselves, We chose our relationship, we chose our marriage,
(26:04):
we chose us, and I think it came out all
fur the better for all that we experienced, all that
we felt from the planning stage, like we were doing
research you know, on YouTube and on you know what,
(26:26):
different things, different sites, just trying to find out more
about the travel experience, what to take, what not to take,
what's okay you know, not going to be your flag
and things like that.
Speaker 2 (26:41):
So if we know, we got a check more more
that we desired.
Speaker 1 (26:46):
Yeah, got our bags, had to get a little special
special attention, but again a learning that we learned, and uh,
we'll travel differently moving forward. But through it all, I
think focusing on as Maurice is always saying, you know,
(27:08):
looking at the man in the mirror, focusing on yourself,
understanding what it is that you really want, what you
really need. Yes, having a family reunion type reception would
have been great, but is that what we really wanted?
Is that what we really needed was that something that
(27:28):
we were trying to then gift everybody else. So we
in this we chose to slow down, not to chase,
but to focus on ourselves. And I think the reward
was so so much greater, and we can plan a
party some other time.
Speaker 3 (27:48):
And I think that, in all honesty that what you
just explained is the foundational part and love again, as
I say, you gott choose yourself, and and then in
(28:09):
choosing yourself, you have to understand what's really truly important
to you.
Speaker 2 (28:13):
Again, sometimes we lose track of that. Sometimes we lose track.
Speaker 3 (28:17):
Of the basics as well. Instead of being so grandioso
and hey, look at me or whatever it is, because
I'm in beyondes with y'all this trip. I try to
keep its so low key as possible before we left,
(28:37):
where some people be like.
Speaker 2 (28:38):
Yo, guess what I'm getting readydo yo?
Speaker 3 (28:40):
Whatever it is, right, you know, But again that's not
who I am. I'm not a showy person like that,
you know. But I believe that this was something that
we needed and that we needed to again reset and
understand and to realign and.
Speaker 2 (29:03):
Refocus with what God has at once for us.
Speaker 3 (29:08):
Because as soon as we got back, not soon, but
since we've been back, our energy, our perspective, what we're
working towards is not the same before we left.
Speaker 2 (29:21):
It really isn't the same.
Speaker 3 (29:23):
And our conversations are not the same, same topics, but
the way the conversation goes is not the same. Not
even the same topics, but similar topics or similar ideas
or topics.
Speaker 1 (29:38):
I don't know how you want to work, but even
things that are similar, you know that, you know, we're
bringing up again, Like you said, there was an issue
before we left. We came back home. The issue is
still there, but being away, as you said, the rhythm
has changed. When we went away, you know, our rhythm
(29:59):
of our connection, our in sincness changed. So now we
face these other issues differently because our rhythm, you know,
is now more in tuned and connected with one another.
Our rhythm is now more connected with God. So the
(30:19):
things that you know testimony, the things that used to
bother me don't bother me no more, you know whatever.
So there has been a change in that capacity of
things that would kind of get underneath of our skin
or bother us or keep us up late at night.
(30:42):
It's just like, oh, okay, you know, we'll ask a
couple of questions and kind of keep it moving from there.
But it doesn't have the same hold the way that
it used to before the trip. And again I don't know,
y'all that's been supposed to rub off and we're out
later on. Just like my son Tan, I'm not gonna
(31:03):
live with it forever. It is gonna, you know, go away.
So I don't know if this little piece that we
have will kind of phase out after a while.
Speaker 3 (31:13):
I can't say that I will because for myself anyway,
and because you'll constantly work at it, right, you know,
you're constantly be like, all right, I can't allow you
or this situation to steal my peace and my joy,
you know, because if I allow that, who wins in
that the enemy wins and I'm the victor in that situation.
Speaker 2 (31:37):
Now is you're gonna tempt me and want to come
at me and.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Whatever it is? All right, that's cool. I got you,
because here's a reality. You've been doing it for so long,
you know, to some degree, you're kind of expecting it,
you get what I mean. So it's like it's not
gonna be a surprise, you know, because there's so many
different ways you've come along and you present in your face,
in your head or whatever it is, you know, So
(32:06):
I'm not going to say and say, well, what else
can you do?
Speaker 2 (32:08):
Like bring it to me. I ain't that bold, you
get what I'm saying. I'm not doing that, you.
Speaker 3 (32:12):
Know, But the reality is is that, yo, do like
you know, Yeah, You've had your moments, right, you know,
because we're all human, right, you had your moments, you know.
But I'm looking forward to having more moments that I
just experienced in on not just this trip, but a
trip that we took a couple of years ago for
my birthday. By going to those places to be able
(32:34):
to see God is real, to see that you know,
what He has done in and around our lives, who
the people that He's touched, not just recently, for our
whole life and reality how much God has protected us,
you know, good, bad, or indifferent, you know, because of
(32:55):
our decisions, right.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
And also understanding.
Speaker 3 (33:00):
That all the other things that would have continue to
fester and to continue to.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Hold us back or whatever it is.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
I say the Coppro now like it doesn't bother me,
you know, and to some degree it doesn't bother me
to a point where I'm like, Yo, like Malic's like
what attitude, Like do you really have right now? Like
who is this person? Like you changed like that much?
You know, like really like that much because God has
been a waymaker throughout all of this. And there are
(33:36):
conversations or even thoughts that I can even just tell.
I could say the cop like YO, in this particular moment,
I know I would have responded that way. I know
I would have said this. I know I would have
said that, and I could see where things really would
have went left. And I'm not saying it to you
(33:57):
to bring it up and to talk about it up
to you to say, you know what, I allow these
moments to get to me. I allowed these topics or
these ideas to get to me, and I allow the
enemy to use me in those moments to get to
both of us. Right, And so here's the reality. I'm
(34:19):
acknowledging that. But this is how we won over that.
This is how we're the victor's over that. And how
when we sit here holding the hands on this slippery
behind floor in a hotel in Puerto Rico, because that
was an ice skating rink in our hotel room, that
as we sit here and stand here and look over
(34:39):
over this ocean, how God's presence is here with us
in this quiet time or or even taking a moment
now we're talking about the ocean and just that stillness
and that you know, we're slowing down of seeing that,
(34:59):
but even in the moment of being in the land
and being in a high rise and being able to
feel like you're closer to Heaven a little bit more right,
you know. And so just like God, look at what
you have been able to do with your people's hands,
but what they've been able to build and what they've
been able to create, you know, and that no matter
what the situation is, that you have blessed us beyond measure,
(35:22):
you know, And so understand that and respecting the fact
that when I say God, yes, cope and I are Christian,
but I also understand and respect each and every one
of you that are possibly listening that are not Christian.
That's why we're just saying God. I'm not saying, oh yeah, Jesus,
you know, whatever it is. I'm understanding that God is
(35:44):
for everybody, is not you know, a particular religion, is
not a particular faith, is not a particular walk of
life or whatever it is. We understand that there's a
lot of you that are listening that are don't necessarily
believe in what we believe in.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
But you listen to what we're bringing out.
Speaker 3 (36:01):
And so whether you are you know, of the Islamic
faith and you feel like Allah.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Has blessed you, you.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Know that you believe that a Li has done marvelous
works and talk to you whatever it might be, you know,
I understand.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
I respect that because here's the other part of that too.
Speaker 3 (36:19):
I got family members that are in that faith, got
family members possibly that are Jewish.
Speaker 2 (36:24):
You know that we read the Torah or whatever it is,
you know. So so.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
I just had to put that out there because you
could see God and all of that, you know, and
how certain things in life right now is really causing
us more and more to become better connected to and
to say, you know what, we need to quiet down
(36:52):
this in this world that's full of notifications and noises
and all that type of stuff, and how that moment
isis can probably feel uncomfortable, but we have to understand
that slowing down together create space for God, for us
to hear his voice and to be present in that moment.
(37:14):
And that also in that we could slow down just
be able to hear what God has to say. How
does that manifest in our hearts and how we deal
with one another.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
You know.
Speaker 3 (37:28):
So, I just want each and every one of you
to know that, you know, yes, Coffin and I have
a renewed life and a renewed outlook on things or
whatever it is, and we want to spread it amongst
each and every one.
Speaker 2 (37:40):
Of you, you know.
Speaker 3 (37:41):
But it has truly changed the way we view each other,
how we react and respond to one another, because we
definitely don't get the same energy that we might have
in the past. Yeh we it's definitely not like that.
And even some of the harder questions or conversations that
(38:05):
in the past that we've had recently.
Speaker 2 (38:09):
Would have gone totally different. Give us two months ago.
Speaker 3 (38:14):
Let alone two years ago or twenty years ago if
we asked the same question.
Speaker 2 (38:19):
You know.
Speaker 3 (38:19):
Again, it's about how you respond and react. Which one
are you doing and how do you.
Speaker 1 (38:25):
Receive it right? You know so, because you know there
are times that you ask questions and I receive it
with you know, tainted lenses and you know, cotton in
my ears, Like you know, there's other things that can
block it, whether it's my own personal past or again,
(38:49):
like you said, hey, our past can sometimes alter how
I hear the question or hear the comment so how
I receive it? And then and like you said, for
how things are all the reads as you said before,
and how how how we're handling all those things. And
(39:11):
it's it's not easy. There's no quick fix to marriage.
There's no do this and add this and stir that
makes a happy marriage. Sorry, that's not that, ain't it.
Speaker 2 (39:29):
You know?
Speaker 1 (39:29):
It's certainly step by step, day by day. You know,
individuals too, imperfect individuals coming together trying to make something
you know good out of it. So I'm not perfect.
I've said that before. So there's days and there's moments,
(39:50):
and there's times that my imperfection it gleams, you know
what I mean. But to God be to glory. I'm
learning and I'm getting better day by day, and this
thing called marriage is helping me along the way. So
(40:10):
we thank you so so much everyone for listening. We
hope that you would share your thoughts, your comments with us.
We'd love to see and hear from you. Thank you
very much. We'll talk to you soon.
Speaker 3 (40:23):
Thanks for tuning in to another episode of a No
Fruit podcast, where we bring you fruitful conversations, ripen wisdom
and love that's deeply rooted. If you enjoyed this episode,
don't forget to subscribe, leave us a review, and share
it with someone.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Who could use a little inspiration in their death.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
Until next time, stay rooted in love and remember every
seed you plant today shapes the fruit of tomorrow.
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