August 21, 2025 • 53 mins
Amy Margolies is cancer survivor, coach and founder of Sunshine Theory.Amy shares her transformative journey from a high-pressure career at Google to facing her breast cancer diagnosis while pregnant. Discover how she has created a nurturing community for cancer survivors, helping them redefine their purpose and embrace life after their battles.
Connect with Amy: https://sunshinetheory.com/ Instagram @sunshine.theory and LinkedIn @sunshine-theory
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Connect with Amy: https://sunshinetheory.com/ Instagram @sunshine.theory and LinkedIn @sunshine-theory
Thank you to our sponsor Honor The Brave.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
You are listening to the on Purpose podcast, your guide
to living a more purposeful life. What's up everybody, and
welcome to this week's show. We're coming to you from
the wide open skies and the mountains of Wyoming. We've
made our way back west from Florida for the winter,
and nothing like summertime in the rocky mountains. I'll tell
(00:22):
you that right now. If you haven't enjoyed it, there's
a lot more to Rocky Mountains, and sometimes people always
think of Colorado. Sneak up into Wyoming. You'll get off
the beaten path, far less crowds and a little bit
of peace of mind to yourself. Not the color I
was bad. We've loved that too. We raise our kids there.
But this stage in life, Wyoming offers us a little
more peace and quiet. So get out and try it
(00:44):
a little bit. And thank you for being here, for
allowing us to show up in your life each and
every week. This week, we're excited to sit down with
Amy Margoliese, a cancer survivor and the CEO of Sunshine Theory,
a coaching platform dedicated to helping cancer survivors rediscover strength,
purpose and joy after their battle. She was a successful
(01:07):
leading digital advertiser at Google, and she faced her own
life altering battle with breast cancer. Her experience reshaped her mission,
pushing her to create a space where survivors can embrace
their post traumatic growth and build a new vision for
their future. And I came across that, and I've heard
a lot about, you know, people fighting back on cancer
(01:28):
and how many people say it redefined their life. You know,
we had Josh Shuber a few weeks ago now at
this point sharing that same story, and I thought, what
a great follow up to that is not just winning
the battle with cancer, but what do we do afterwards?
And I think so many of us, even if we're
not fighting cancer, just battles in our lives, Like we
focus so hard on overcoming this battle or winning this thing,
(01:50):
and a lot of times once it's over, we're left
with this void of what do I do next? How
do I perform? What am I supposed to be doing?
Who am I? So I'm excited to sit down and
share this story with Amy, with you all, and I
want to thank you before we get to it. I
want to thank you that have jumped over to YouTube
and subscribed and shared our channels there have followed us
(02:11):
on Instagram to where you can see that the shorter
clips of the shows each and every week, and to
thank you for helping us build our brand and our
community with the goal in mind of not being the biggest,
but being the most impactful podcast in the world, the
one that puts smiles on people's faces, that gets them
thinking differently, maybe get some reminding of promises they left
(02:35):
unanswered or things they're supposed to be doing, but maybe
they just kind of lost their way. So I want
to thank you for being part of that movement, thank
you for being part of our community, and I hope
you enjoy this week's interview with Amy Margalisee. Enjoy the show.
Honor the Brave was founded by retired law enforcement officer
Jeff Wolfgang and his wife Xana after Jeff was injured
in the line of duty. It's their way of giving
(02:57):
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If you're a military or first responder, past or present,
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(03:19):
military families, and you'll receive a handmade wooden flag honoring
your service. Visit honor the Brave dot com. We've got
your six, Amy, my newest friend. Welcome to the On
Purpose podcast. It's a pleasure to have you here. And
I got to start by asking how are you doing today?
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I'm doing great.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I always share start my day with a little bit
of me time. So whether that's you know, taking a
breath and taking my dog for a long walk, or
if it's going to play tennis, which is one of
my big passions, I always try to make sure I
start my day with something that's gonna fill me and
set the mood for the day.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
So I am in a good mood.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
I love it. I love it. So now you're playing tennis,
so you're a traditionalist. You haven't converted to pickleball yet.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, this is how I look at it. I love tennis.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Pickle Ball's fun for social one is one is my sport.
One is fun social play.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Okay, So if I show up and I'm hanging out
with pickleball, Amy, We're gonna laugh and have fun. But
tennis Amy is gonna try to beat me.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
That's right, That's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
All right, Well.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
But I will nail that overhead in pickleball too.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Oh yeah, yeah, you got You got to hit some
people with the ball every now and then. That's the joy. Yes,
I mean so then what does podcast Amy show up as?
Speaker 2 (04:48):
So podcast Amy, you're gonna get both. You get the
real Amy. We're I'm a mixed bag, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I love it. So I gotta be watching out for
that overhead slam. Make sure I don't get hit in
the mouth.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
No, I'm friendly.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
I love it. Amy. I want to thank you for
what you're doing. I want to thank you for one
for the battle you fought, and now two for what
you're doing to prepare people for life after their battles
are won. And like I was sharing with you, what
caught my eye about your story was I was thinking
in life to so many of us have obstacles to
overcome big challenges, big hurdles, and we put so much
(05:24):
energy and effort into it that a lot of times
when we beat it, when we overcome it, we have
this steep drop off of Wow, what's next. I put
so much time and energy and effort, I've kind of
forgotten who I am, and you're equipping people to begin
again that it's not the end of anything.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
So I'll just start with a brief overview of my
own journey and how I came to this insight of
where we needed that second, you know, second boost of help.
I always say there's there's two you know what now
moments for cancer survivors or anybody going through some sort
(06:08):
of traumatic event, whether it's a divorce or losing a.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Job, et cetera.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
It's I find with my clients it's very you know,
similar in terms of the experience physically mentally, obviously it's
different things. But the what the what now is you
know when you first when I was first diagnosed with cancer,
and this is most people unless you have been through
(06:33):
it with somebody else, But you know, I was what now,
I'm diagnosed with cancer and I don't even know what
doctors to call, I don't know what treatment options.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
You know, you just don't know anything.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
So that's a first scary moment when you're first diagnosed.
You kind of I always say, you don't know what
you need to know until you need to know it. Yeah, right,
So all of a sudden, now I'm learning about breast
cancer and treatment options and what kind of doctors to see.
And when I was diagnosed, it was a month after
(07:09):
finding out I was pregnant with my third child, so
I had the added complexity of also having, you know,
working with a high risk abgistetrician, you know, seeing if
we keep the baby. There were a lot of very
heavy decisions that had to be made. Ultimately, I did
find a oncologist who specialized in working with young pregnant
(07:34):
women diagnosed with cancer, and she gave me that clarity,
that breakthrough that I needed to move forward with my
plan and treatment that was safe while pregnant.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
And then we did all the heavy stuff afterwards. So
that was my clarity moment.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Let me stop you that, because I want to get
to the heavy stuff. But first I like to warm
you up. I don't like to just jump into it.
We got to have a little rapid fire warm up
so we get to know what you're saying to do
it you ready, and then then just like you're just
like you did there, you went out sought help, you
sot some different opinions and then you got to the
heavy stuff. We're gonna do that right now. Are you
(08:14):
ready for this? Let's go, Amy.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
How about you're gonna slam some the overheads at me.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Let's do this. What Amy, What's what's the best one
word description of you?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Positive?
Speaker 1 (08:31):
I like that one? What makes you say that so quickly?
Speaker 3 (08:36):
It's it's just the vibe that is always around me.
It's what got me through treatment. Mindset is something that
I work first with all my clients, like getting in
the right mindset to.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Open yourself up. But yeah, I see.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I like to see things in a positive way because
other ways you're going down the hill, you know.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yeah, for sure. What's the favorite quote or quo that's
stuck with you throughout life?
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Oh gosh, I now have to think.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
I don't want to.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Mess it up because I do write this and I think.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
About this a lot.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, but it's actually an old Michael Jordan quote and
it talks about kind of resilience and I love it.
He says, I've missed more than nine thousand shots in
my career. I've lost more than three hundred games. I've
failed over and over again in my life, and that's
(09:33):
why I succeed. I love that one because again, it
talks about resilience, it talks about not you know, you
learn from everything that happens in your life. I you know,
I never say look back, and you never say would have,
could have, should have.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
It's really take.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Any of those moments, what do you learn and what's
going to catapult you even higher?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
I love it already, Amy, We're already on right foot.
Anybody could quote Michael Jordan's a friend of mine. All right,
all right, if your life had a theme song, what
would your song be?
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Girls?
Speaker 3 (10:14):
Just want to have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Sydney Lauper? Why she hit that?
Speaker 3 (10:21):
My mom and I it's it's a memory from my
childhood and I do it with my daughter now. So
it's kind of you know, that theme through life. We
just get up and dance and laugh and smile like
that's what life is, right Like it should be fun.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
We live here, why not have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:38):
You know that song is so goofy, youet so catchy
that I wonder if she had any right, like, had
any idea when she made it, because I was like
eighty four or somethimes a while ago that it would
survive like so long and still have an impact.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Like you're saying, yeah, it's a classic.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
It is, all right, what's your favorite book or a
book that you're currently reading either, Oh well.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
I'm currently reading Outlive by Peter Ashia. I forget how
to say his last name exactly, you might want.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
To, but it's called Outlive and it really it's so
interesting because it talks about training for your centennial, like
you're moving into your hundreds, right, Like the overall theme
is when we move, you know, when we move towards
(11:32):
the end of our lives, most people expect to have
a downward spiral of some sort, whether it's memory, it's physical,
et cetera.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
And what he talks about is.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Why should we expect the last five ten years of
our life to be where we can't pick up our grandkids,
we can't walk upstairs, you know, all of these things,
and it's really training your body for those moments, right,
like you you should have just a rap decline at
the end. Maybe it's maybe it's a week, maybe it's
(12:03):
a month, but it shouldn't be five ten years where
you're debilitated. And it talks, you know, it talks about
all of the Horsemen, right, like the chronic diseases that
are impacting America and the world so much right now.
So I find that book very interesting. I read a
lot of those books, and yeah, I have you know,
(12:26):
I have other favorite books from historical but I do
like to read fiction.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Yeah, I love that's good. What's uh? You could have
dinner with one person they could have passed or still
be with us, Amy, who would you want to have
dinner with? And what would you want to ask them?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Oh gosh, I've done these conversations at different tables during
my career and they're always intriguing. You have to give
me a minute on this one. I have to think,
because this one changes depending on like where I am
in my.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Life, I know, but lob smashing aim, he doesn't have
this much time.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
I know. I would probably say. I always thought like.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Maybe like someone really really spiritual and like connected, like
like a Gandhi. Yeah, someone like that. That that is
just so insightful because I think having those insights and
sharing insights is so interesting and it gets me thinking
(13:39):
a lot. So I think those could be really interesting conversations.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, for sure. And I think I love what you
said there and It reminds me of I would say
almost everybody that comes to this community. One trait we
all have in common is we live curiously and we're
always intrigued. Love that. I love that right to learn
something new and have these conversations. So I am excited
Amy to get to your conversation. If you feel warmed up, now,
(14:07):
are you ready to go on this?
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I'm ready. What I do all day every day.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
I love it, Amy, So talk to us about how
your battle with cancer shifted your perspective on like success, happiness,
and your own fulfillment.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yeah. Absolutely, So.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
It was a challenge, and I do work with a
lot of women, like high performing career women.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Who are going through these different challenges in life.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
And the reason I point that out is because I
had been working at a you know, very high stress,
high leveled career at Google when I was diagnosed with cancer.
So I think that was really hard, and I think
it's a big challenge for women who are so driven,
especially in our society that we have now. I think,
(15:00):
you know, like modern society really kind of drives that,
you know, burnout almost in women where you're you're having
this high pressure that you have to deal with and
for me to step away from that to deal with
my cancer. I knew I had to take a leaf
(15:21):
from work, and that was really hard for me to
go from you know, pressure and like always driving and
always action to actually having to like realize, Okay, what
does self care mean? I need to turn inward and
focus on myself. Like if I need to lay down
on a couch for a day, don't feel guilty, Like
that's what your body needs that day.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
You need rest.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
So it really kind of pivoted me to see the
importance of those kind of moments. You know, I always
understood food, and I always understood you know, exercise and
those things that are still.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Very very important.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
But I think it was that pause and instead of
focusing outward, focusing inward. It was a big pivot and
a big understanding.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
What was Was there a moment where you realized that
had been kind of a missing piece for you? Was
that because it sounds that I've been reading a lot
and studying a lot, and we're really kind of shifting
away from this hustle and grind culture that kind of
permeated most of our working at the time. Right liked
take breaks. Right, the busier you are the better you are.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Was there a moment when you realized, like, wait a second,
I have to focus on me.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
It was when I had to speak to my my
leaders at the time and tell them, you know, I
need to take a leave because I don't know how
I'm feeling each day. I don't know, you know, when
I need to go into hospital or not. So it
(17:03):
was that conversation, in that moment when I was like, okay,
I'm doing this like I need to.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Yeah, how was that received?
Speaker 3 (17:12):
It was received so well. You know, I had I
had incredible leaders at the time. One of my bosses
at the time actually his wife also had gone through cancer,
so he was very understanding from that side as well
and helpful.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
But yeah, it was. It was a big shift for me.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I always, you know, I always prioritized my team's you know,
health and well being, and I wasn't really focusing on
me as much, you know.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
But yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
It was that moment when I realized, Okay, this is
this is where we have to pivot.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
And you mentioned something earlier I want to dive into you.
You had mentioned about women in the workplace, specifically having
difficulty coming to this decision. Yeah, do you think that's
different than if a guy has cancer at or from
your experience and what you went through, tell me, like,
what would be different there?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
You know, I think it's hard to say specifically because
I think everybody, everybody deals with a diagnosis so differently.
Some people are ready to talk about it right away.
Some people can't deal with everything until years after. So
I do think it's a very individualized thing. I don't
want to say necessarily women to men. I know, historically
(18:28):
we have seen you know, more men in leadership roles,
and you know there there definitely is that aspect, and
I do I think, you know, sometimes women, it could
be harder. You're you're a little bit nervous, like if
you're in line for you know, the next job, or
you know, you could be nervous about saying, you know,
(18:49):
I need to take this time and realize it could
mean you know, you know, not as quick of a
rise or a setback to your career.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Yeah, And that's what I was wondering is if like
if you felt or and women in general might feel like, Okay,
if I take this time off, I may never get
back to this level again, right, right? And did that
factor into your decision making of like, if I step away,
will I ever get to this point again professionally?
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Yeah, you know, I've always been career driven and love
you know, doing things that make an impact. I love
seeing that. That's why I love my work today, which
I pivoted to. But yeah, I mean, I it would
have been a concern of mine. But I'll tell you honestly,
like when I had to make that decision, and when
(19:41):
I was going through these much bigger life decisions, I
realized that life decisions are way, way, way more important
than anything a career could give me.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
I was fighting for my life.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
I was fighting for my children's life, and that's what
took priority.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Yeah, it's such a good shift in perspective writing.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
And did you find really is did you find that
that shift in perspective not just focused on your work
but opened up a whole bunch of other ways of
looking at things?
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Absolutely, It's what I You know, I work on my
Like I said in the beginning, I work on mindset
first with everybody. I think I have actually a program
called flipping the script, And I said that all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
I'm like, we have to flip the script. You have
to flip the script.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
On this and it is it's it's so simplistic, but
it really is something that you need to do for
it to become a habit, right, Like a lot of
people are so quick to look at the negative side
or sometimes in culture, I feel I don't know if
you see this or feel this too, but I feel
like almost like people like you start a conversation and
(20:54):
it's like complaining about things is.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
The conversation and it's not. You know, it's like all the.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Weather sucks today, or you know, like, yeah, I had
to do that, but it really was hard.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
It sucked, you know what. You know, my car's broken again.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
You know, you could talk about all those things, or
you could just shift the way you talk. Sometimes even
just putting a smile on your face changes the outcome
of what you're gonna say, what you're going to feel.
So there are a lot of things around mindset, and
like I said, I have a positive mindset, but it's
how to teach other people that they.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Too can look at things differently.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
And I know we talked about some books before, but
one of the one of my favorite books around this is.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
It's The Happiness Formula.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Have You by mogwat He's he was an ex Google employee,
wrote this book.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
But it's really about how you can look at things differently.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
I've not read I've heard of it, i haven't read it.
So how do you catch yourself then? Amy when you
wake up and you're like, okay, today's not like I
just don't feel like. Some days you get up and
it's easy. Other days you're like, okay, this is a
work in progress here, yep. How do you reframe things?
How do you get yourself allow yourself to one to
have that space, and a two to move past it.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
Yeah, so the first thing you said is exactly what
I do. I allow myself to feel it. You know,
if I am tired one day and it's just kind
of rainy and you know that kind of thing, maybe
I'll go for a walk in the rain or sit
next to the rain, so instead of it being like
gloomy and depressing, it's actually like refreshing and nice to
(22:39):
be able to watch it or feel it. But that's
the important thing, right, is giving yourself the space for it,
but not sitting in it.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Right.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
You don't, I don't want to you don't want to
sit in that feeling for too long.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
You do wanna It's.
Speaker 3 (22:56):
It's not that you can't have any negative feelings, because
we have to have different kinds of feelings and we're
going to feel different. But the important thing is not
sitting in it and then being able to, you know,
embrace and get out and move forward again.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
That's the important thing.
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Yeah, I agree with you wholeheartedly there. And I was
always thinking about that when I haven't always been the
best at this, for sure in my life, and when
I denied how I felt, it usually spirals, it does, right,
it becomes something way bigger. Man, if ID just dealt
with this at the beginning, had been so much easier.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
Yep, absolutely absolutely, And I think that too, right, Like
we were talking about, you know, the beginning of my
journey and going through it.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
But I think that's the biggest thing that I saw.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Coming out of my treatment was you know, I had
the baby and then was back on all the hard stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
Again and got through that.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
And I still remember, I remember the moment when you're
asking about moments, this one I is so clear to me.
I remember sitting in my oncollege's office and she goes Okay,
it's your last confusion today.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
And I looked at her and I was like, what,
you know, what's next? That's the question. What's next?
Speaker 3 (24:16):
Like you're so used to doctors and nurses telling you
where to be, how you're going to feel. You get
print outs on you know these this is how you're
going to feel, and you have to be in here Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.
You know, you're always scheduled and getting through it, and
then at the end, it just felt like, you know,
you're dropped. It's like, oh, yeah, I'm this new person.
(24:36):
I just went through all of this treatment, and how
do I come back into the world. And I felt,
you know, there was some support, but you know it
was you know, there's a counselor who you can meet
with maybe once a month or every once in a while,
or it's it's with people who haven't been through it
(24:57):
and don't understand going through that kind of trauma.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
And I think, you know, that's where I saw.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
Immediately, I was like, oh my gosh, there's there's this
dropped feeling and I don't feel support. And I immediately
went and I signed up and I I got certified
and in functional medicine and into in nutrition and all
this stuff. I just really just dove in and I said,
(25:26):
there's no support. I mean, there's so much confusion on
what can.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I what do I eat? What's going to cause? What
could You're just anything to.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
Stop reoccurrence from happening, right, It's like you're scared.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
There's a fear. So many people have coming out of it.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
And I love which and that's one of the things
I love about you and me and what attracted me
that I want to have this conversation is you see
a problem. You don't just want to be the problem.
You're like, wait, I can solve this. Yeah, So so
talk me through that train position though, because I think
you hit it on the head. A lot of us
will get to that point where we do feel like
whatever support we had, whatever we're fighting for, is over.
(26:07):
We're no longer part of that team because we beat it.
So we moved on and we don't know what the
hell to do now? What is that void?
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Taught me through that emotional transition of picking yourself up
and going wait a second, I will take on this challenge.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:24):
I think that is a part of me. I've always
been a problem solver. Right in my career, it was
one of you know, besides working with my team and
mentoring and growing a team, which I love doing, but
I also love to identify problems and figure out there
are better ways to do things, to streamline things, to
(26:45):
make it more efficient. And I think I carry that
same behavior over to this I in life.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Right, So I did.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
I knew I felt a gap, and I started reaching
out to their cancer survivors patients that I knew, and
I was like, hey, you know, what are you doing
afterwards or how are you feeling, and just kind of
checking in with with different people and seeing, you know,
does everybody feel this?
Speaker 2 (27:15):
And it was it was it's a big gap, you know.
I started searching around.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
For support or you know how like personalized, right personalized
to me because everybody is bio unique, so it's you know,
putting one blanket diet over everybody is never going to work.
Putting a blanket theme over everybody's not going to work, right,
So the importance for that individualized, personalized support is was
(27:44):
completely missing. So I knew that it was something I needed.
I then talking to others it was something that they
needed and we kind of grew from there.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Yeah, let's follow up. That was my next question I
had for the importance of community when you are redefining
yourself and beginning to talk to me about that, What
have you've learned from your community, both about yourself and
about them and how we can better serve Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
So I think, you know, just seeing consistently across the
board that yes, we are bio unique in our bodies,
but emotionally, yes, there are different ways and different things,
but we're all. Everybody has gone through trauma and going
through trauma, there are you know, very similar themes that
(28:41):
go across everybody, and I think that's what brings this
community and the people that I surround myself with together. Supportive,
incredibly supportive, never never judgment. I you know, there's no judgment.
You are who you are, and I of you.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
Because you are you, you.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
Know, and it's it's really I'm you know, I would
say I have, you know, a.
Speaker 2 (29:08):
Diverse group of people.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
But there's certain characteristics to everybody, and I think that
overall theme is just kindness, right, is supporting and being
kind to each other and letting people be who they are.
I just I just see so much wonderful connections through that.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
And that interesting, right, it's still a battle for your
life and they battle for their life. And now you
find that actually people are very kind.
Speaker 3 (29:39):
Yeah, and I think you know you hear this often,
but having lived through it, I can honestly tell you
when you are faced with the near death experience, when
you come out on the other side, prioritization of what's
important in life completely changes. I always say, I don't
(30:00):
know if I'm allowed to swear it's a past all right,
good good, no family ratings, but I always say it's.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
I just lost my track of thought.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
You're gonna cuss at me, so I was getting ready
to dodge that.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
I know that happens too. Oh.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
It's all about giving less fucks in life, you know,
And I truly believe that. Like before, let anything like
sometimes stress me or you know, expectations or people saying
do you have to.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Do this and this, and it's it's.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
Not important right now, right like, I don't need that
stress right now. We'll figure that out when it comes.
And you know, I prioritize my friendships, my connections, my people.
I prioritize my family. You know, you really do you
realize what matters, and like I said, giving less fucks, Like, Okay,
that's not important right now. I don't want to stress
(31:03):
about that. That's ruining my energy, you know. So it's
learning what to say no to. And I also believe
in saying yes to more. I always say yes to
things because there's so often, so many times you're invited
to something and it's okay if you don't have.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
The energy for real and you say no. But trying
to say yes.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
To more, like you could sit on the couch and
be home, or you could have this amazing experience and
meet like new people, or find something you'd love to do.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
So I love saying yes to as much as I can.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
All Right, I want to know what's one of the
most surprising things you said yes to?
Speaker 2 (31:45):
My husband?
Speaker 1 (31:46):
No, you are a way out of his league right now.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
No, totally kidding. My husband's very supportive and great. But
I think I think I'll tell you. I we were
looking for a move.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
After my battle and everything. I just I just needed
something new and to experience something new, that's what feeds me.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
And we did. We made an out of state move.
We went from New Jersey to Florida. And you know,
I said, yes, let's do this.
Speaker 3 (32:24):
Let's you know, there's so many reasons why not, but
there's one big reason why. So I said, let's do
this same thing with having our third child. Our other
two were seven and ten at the time, and we
were almost we were almost out of it, and I said,
let's do this.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Yea, yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
So I think I always joke in some way, and
like when when life is very calm, I tend to
throw something into it to drive that chaos again. But
you know, I think it's again and just say yes,
like let that chaos.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Figure your way through it.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
It builds resilience, it builds strength, that builds, it builds
so much like if you're not saying yes and experiencing
these new.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Things, how do you know, how are you going to grow?
So that's how I live my life.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
I love it. How has that changed your parenting?
Speaker 2 (33:24):
I think it shows my kids.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
Like one thing I'll talk about, like the move right,
like moving out of state. It was a little harder
for my oldest but since everybody's been here, like everybody's
embraced the change. I think they see me you know,
being having been you know, being a working mom and
being able to do all these things and make a difference.
(33:49):
I think it's I see myself as being a good
role model for them. And you know, I talked to
my kids all the time. I said, you know, you
guys are so lucky today because when when people moved
when we were younger, they moved unless your parents were
super close or there was some way you see them
once a year, but they're pretty much they moved, you know,
(34:12):
I said, Today, you guys have FaceTime. You can talk
to your friends all the time and hang out with
them and have friends here and have friends in different countries.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Like it's a different world. It's way more connected.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
So I think, you know, opening their eyes to seeing,
you know, what they have available to them and how
they can stay connected, is you know, really important and
something that they have really grasped to continue to grow
your network with good people.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Yeah, and I sense you're very humble. I mean, I
appreciate that about you, But I would I would add
that I without knowing your kids, I would bet they
see that their mom is fearless and that she tags
things head on. And if mom can fight this battle
and wake up the next thing and say hey, we're
gonna through this bad I guess what, We're gonna move
(35:03):
and create more stuff for us to deal with. You're
teaching them to be fearless, right, and to embrace uncertainty
in life, and that we don't have to have all
the answers all the time, right, that's right. One of
the things that society now we're over analytical. We've got
all this information, but sometimes it paralyzes us because we
don't act. Absolutely right, you don't have to have all
(35:23):
the answers. You just got to go and like you said,
if you surround yourself with good people you believe in yourself,
you're gonna end up in a great spot.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
You're right, yep.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
And often so your network too, you know, supporting each other,
lifting each other up. It opens you to new opportunities,
new connections. So yeah, I definitely definitely agree with what
you just said.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Well, I hope so, because that's talking about you. Yeah.
And the other thing you do amy right there is
when you make that change, you create new schals.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Yeah, yes, right.
Speaker 1 (36:03):
And one of the one of the things that drives
me crazy is when people are still stuck in believing
and doing the exact same thing they've been doing for
years with no room for growth.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Right, I agree, it's that stuck.
Speaker 3 (36:17):
It's that and that's often where I'll see clients come
to me after coming out of treatment or you know,
some sort of trauma come down, you know, a couple
of months, a couple of years later after and that's
exactly what what it is.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
They're stuck.
Speaker 3 (36:36):
They're stuck, don't know how to change, don't know how
to make something different, And it's this, it's this continual cycle.
But like you said, if you keep doing the same things,
you're gonna be stuck. It's gonna nothing's gonna move, nothing's
gonna change unless you are the one making that happen.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Yeah. And what I love about what you're doing and
people that do push that envelope a little bit is
it opens up other people's eyes to what's possible.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Yeah. Yeah, it's like a lead by example for sure.
So you know.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
Yeah, So let's talk about resilience, right, because you speak
a lot about that in your post traumatic growth. Yeah.
How do you define resilience and then how do you
practice that?
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (37:26):
Resilience is the ability to you know, move through challenges,
hard challenges and be able to come out you know,
stronger and better from learning from you know, those challenges,
and you keep building on that and you become stronger,
(37:49):
you become more knowledgeable, and that's just you know, the
power of.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Resilience is to be able to move through it.
Speaker 3 (37:56):
And you know something that I was always told, you know,
my superpower was when when I.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Was working, and.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
You know, they'd say leading with with you know, calm
in the face of the storm. Right, it's being able
to to you know, take that challenge, not freak out
and go crazy, but like say, Okay, this is what's
in front of me. This is how we're going to
move through it, and then learning and being able to
(38:28):
be one level higher.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
The next time a challenge comes. So really understanding.
Speaker 3 (38:35):
You know, it's not crazy, it's just this is something
that's in front of me today, or this is something
that's in front of me now, let's deal with it, right,
That's the only way to move forward is to deal
with it.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
So whether you deal with.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
It and you're like stressed and crazy or you know,
you can have some of that energy in you. Don't
get me wrong, I get I have anxiety, I have fears,
But it's how you deal with those that's the important part.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
Yeah, too many people think that having fear is a
bad thing. I think that I always shift if having
fear is a great thing, right, Because if I'm that
pushes you, it's gonna make you make decisions. If I'm afraid,
that means I usually care about something. Yes, Yeah, it's
hard to be afraid of ship you don't care about
who cares.
Speaker 3 (39:27):
That's what my my husband always tells my son before
going out, you know, before a big match or.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
You know, whatever sport he's doing. He's like, I'm nervous.
He's like, Okay, then you're ready. You're ready, you know.
Speaker 3 (39:41):
Yeah, that adrenaline is something you need to go out there.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
So yeah, embracing those moments.
Speaker 1 (39:48):
Yeah, So how do you say, say, we're talking and
I'm just I'm so afraid of what's next. I'm afraid
to make this big decision. But it's pretty obvious to
the people around me, but I just can't take action.
How would you coach them through? What steps would you
say to be able to practice becoming more resilient and
to believing in yourself that you can recreate yourself.
Speaker 3 (40:09):
Essentially, Yeah, I think you know, the first step is really.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Really just identifying and.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
Understanding the healing through what that trauma was. Right, let's
talk about it. Let's you know, you have to bring
it into the open. I think before you were saying,
like so many people don't talk about things and they
bury things and it becomes a bigger snowball.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Right, so we have to stop the snowball.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
First, let's heal through the trauma. And then like I said,
the number one thing that I work on first is
the mindset. Mindset is so critical in everything moving forward.
It's your motivation, it's your willingness to Then we move
into you know, how to heal your body through different
foods and importance of strength training. But without that mindset,
(41:03):
the motivation and the willing and the understanding of how
to recreate yourself doesn't happen. So then we work on
mindset and it is about you know, those just simple
things like flipping the script, how the brain works, you know,
with the fight or flight when that comes up. So
we really dive into mindset first, and that's that's what
(41:26):
we would work on first, and then moving through like
I said, looking at individuals, this is like the super
personalized part where it's what diet is going to help you.
And this is where I really focus on chronic disease
prevention because that is the biggest problem that we have
(41:47):
today in America is these chronic disease is just catapulting.
So really identifying strength training and the right diet that
is going to help prevent those chronic diseases. And then
the final part that I focus on, and this is
like the most rewarding part, is Okay, now we have
(42:09):
all that set. Now you're in a good space, you're
in a healthy mindset. What's next where you can grow
to And that's the fun part. Like people I'm like, okay,
this was your old life before.
Speaker 2 (42:21):
What didn't you like? What do you like?
Speaker 3 (42:24):
What makes you feel good? And that's the explosive part, right,
Like I have seen people leave and just completely like
pivot careers or make a move like we did, and
just understanding that like you have the freedom to do that,
you can make these things happen if if we you.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Know, just do it.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:47):
Yeah, So that's that's essentially, you know, the kind of
the healing framework that we work through. I have, you know,
I have mini courses that clients look at, like you know,
sugar detox and just working on the mindset, but really
like to deep dive and see that transformation.
Speaker 2 (43:05):
It's moving through all of those parts.
Speaker 1 (43:08):
I love it. When did you realize that your journey
need to be shared, that your journey needed to be
calm the sunshine theory.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Yeah, it wasn't until after my treatment was done. So
I I often found it overwhelming to talk about constantly,
you know, my treatment, how I was feeling, what was
going on. You know, I would I would share updates
(43:37):
obviously with friends and family, but it was too overwhelming.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
To understand what was happening until after my treatment.
Speaker 3 (43:45):
So it was it was so I finished my treatment
in August of.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Twenty twenty.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Mind you COVID, right, we're in COVID error craziness. And
I actually gave birth to my daughter in the beginning
of April, right when the world shut down, and I
was positive with COVID. So that was a whole nother thing.
But it wasn't until I moved through all of my
treatment at the end of August. It was then it
(44:16):
was that time around the holidays. I started thinking, you know,
it was like I felt dropped. I was just sitting
here and that's when I took action, Like it's said before,
I took action, and I started these courses and I
started really deep dive, you know, learning into the areas
that I needed to go deeper into.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
And that's kind of what I did.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
I just I just really dove into it and wanted
to learn as much as I could to be able
to help others because I knew what it felt like,
you know, being left and lost, and I wanted to
help others, Like you shouldn't feel that way when you
have just survived this. You know, you just fought this
(45:00):
incredible battle, and you shouldn't have fought that incredible battle
to return to a life.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
That doesn't make you happy.
Speaker 3 (45:08):
And that's the biggest thing I always it's writing your
next chapter.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
You get to write it. How would you write your
story if it you know, to make you happy, to
make you grow, to keep you excited and thriving, Like
those are really the important things because that's what you
fought for.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
Yeah, no, Amy, you're saying that, And I'm thinking to
our veteran community out there, because we're heavily involved in
the veterans and how many of them suffer kind of
the same mental block, right they come home from fighting
for their country and fighting a war to a world
that doesn't make sense to them and that they struggle
to relate back to. And I think you're right. A
(45:52):
lot of times it's because we don't give ourselves permission
to become new.
Speaker 3 (45:58):
Right, Right, you come back, it's a different life. The
world has moved on, things have changed. Yeah, I could
definitely see that. Like I said, I think the trauma
across the board. There's differences, of course, and there's a uniqueness,
but when you look at the whole thing, it's the
(46:18):
same feelings.
Speaker 2 (46:19):
It's the same path that you need to go through
for change.
Speaker 1 (46:23):
And I think one of the best things we can
do is have conversations about it.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
Yeah, I agree. I say, like, look at when we
grew up right, nobody.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
Talked about depression, anxiety, you know, all these different feelings
that people have.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
And it is positive that it has.
Speaker 3 (46:43):
Become more of a mainstream topic, for sure, But I
agree we need more and more voices out there talking
about the reality of this, you know. I it's something
I see in like comments that come back on some
of the posts I do on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (46:58):
They're like, wow, you hit the new l on the head.
Speaker 3 (47:01):
Oh, I never knew anybody else felt like this.
Speaker 2 (47:05):
You know, it's just like, Okay.
Speaker 3 (47:06):
I'm not I'm not weird or I'm not like feeling anything.
You know, you're that is a normal thing. You're allowed
to feel that. And yeah, I think the more people talking,
it's it's so critical.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
One of the things I always try to keep people
from doing is getting in this trauma comparison right where, yes,
well I can't speak out because I didn't battle cancer,
so I can only listen to amy. I don't have
a voice. But no, all of us have gone through something, yes, right,
and we don't have to.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
Do this conversation yesterday.
Speaker 1 (47:41):
Really, how did it go?
Speaker 3 (47:44):
So it it went well because I was able to
show the person so we're talking about they were complaining
they had just gone through a stroke and a heart attack, right,
Like that's pretty serious too, And they're like, you know, oh,
(48:05):
I'm feeling this way, but I shouldn't complain because you
went through cancer and pregnancy and everything. And I stopped
them right there and I said that doesn't matter. I said,
your trauma is your trauma. I said, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (48:19):
How I felt. Let's talk about you.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
You know this is what you felt, and these are
real feelings you felt, so let's talk about that. It's
not it's not a comparison. I hate that too.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Yeah, that whole comparison is the thief of joy. Right,
And it's not just comparison comparing ourselves to what people have,
but sometimes we're comparing ourselves to what people have gone
through and minimizing our own emotions.
Speaker 3 (48:42):
And right or expectations of how you should be. Right,
like it is, it's comparison comparison.
Speaker 2 (48:52):
We both had a problem with that.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
Way because I've dodged that lob. I know it's coming
at me here in a minute.
Speaker 3 (49:01):
Yeah, it's that, and it's it's you know, trying to
live up to other people's expectations.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
All of that wipe it out for sure. Do you
and do what feels good to you.
Speaker 1 (49:14):
And that's it, man, So true, Amy, I love it
because here's here's the reality is we're all unique, every
one of us, and if you don't step into your uniqueness,
the world will lose out on it when you go away.
Speaker 2 (49:28):
That's right, that's right. You're here for a reason, right, Yeah,
and yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:36):
And the goal is to get to the end and
have it all stored up. It's to get to the
end and go. Man, I gave it all the way.
Speaker 2 (49:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:43):
Yeah, So Amy, answer this for me. How would you
suggest or tips, practical tips for people that are struggling
maybe to find a purpose after winning their battle. What
are some things you'd recommend to help build confidence and
find direct in life?
Speaker 3 (50:00):
Again, Yeah, I think confidence comes from doing you have
to do to build up your confidence. So that's that's
the first thing there. And I think you know, finding
purpose is sitting down sometimes.
Speaker 2 (50:18):
I think of like this Venn diagram.
Speaker 3 (50:21):
Right, it's it's what people say you're good at, what
you enjoy doing, and where there's a need right right
in that center is you know where your purpose lies
and it is it's it's journaling. We do it through journaling,
through mindfulness, through you know, prompt questions and work through
(50:46):
that to find what.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
What excites you.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
It's it's often a gut feeling, too, right, I say,
listen to your gut. Like people come to me and
they're like, I'm really excited for a job. For instance,
I'm really excited about this job, but I'm not sure
if I should do this, And I'll tell them I'll say, Okay,
tell me about each each option that you have, and
this could be for anything.
Speaker 2 (51:07):
Talk to me about each option, and I can hear
it in their voice.
Speaker 3 (51:11):
They're like, oh my gosh, it's growing and it's so
fun and you can do this and this, But I
think I should really stay at my job because it's
more money, and.
Speaker 2 (51:22):
Go for the new one. You're more excited, go for
the new one.
Speaker 3 (51:25):
Yeah, you know, sometimes you just have to talk it
out and listen to what your body's feeling, because the
gut tells you a lot.
Speaker 1 (51:34):
It does if we just listen to it and quit
trying to overrun it with our ridiculous self preservation.
Speaker 2 (51:39):
Analyzing self preservation. That's right, Yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (51:44):
I love what you said there. Amy That confidence comes
from doing mm hmm. It doesn't come from reading more,
analyzing more, gathering more data. It comes from doing getting
out there, falling down, scraping your knees they're all some
band aids on and getting going again. That's right, yep,
(52:06):
and it's so awesome to get to talk to you.
I'm I'm glad it worked out. I know we had
some logistics earlier in the year, but this is right.
Where you're supposed to be, and I want to thank
you for what you're doing. Thank you for your voice
and your courage and sharing your story to impact others.
And where can our community follow along and become part
of your network?
Speaker 3 (52:26):
Absolutely so, most active on Instagram handle at Sunshine dot Theory.
Website is Sunshine theory dot com, where you can find
most of the information and also on LinkedIn because I
do work with corporations in some of the mindset and
(52:48):
you know nutritional work too, so you can also find
me on LinkedIn Sunshine Theory and right now too where
we have too mini programs that are that we're launching
for the summer, as well as you.
Speaker 2 (53:08):
Know, deep transformative work. Sure, so all of that's on
my website.
Speaker 1 (53:12):
You can through awesome Amy, Thank you so much. We
appreciate what you're doing for the world and keep it up.
Speaker 3 (53:17):
My friend, same to you. You're giving an even wider voice,
So thank.
Speaker 1 (53:21):
You and remember team. Life is far too short to
live any other way than on purpose. We'll see you
all again next week.
You are listening to the on Purpose podcast, your guide
to living a more purposeful life. What's up everybody, and
welcome to this week's show. We're coming to you from
the wide open skies and the mountains of Wyoming. We've
made our way back west from Florida for the winter,
and nothing like summertime in the rocky mountains. I'll tell
(00:22):
you that right now. If you haven't enjoyed it, there's
a lot more to Rocky Mountains, and sometimes people always
think of Colorado. Sneak up into Wyoming. You'll get off
the beaten path, far less crowds and a little bit
of peace of mind to yourself. Not the color I
was bad. We've loved that too. We raise our kids there.
But this stage in life, Wyoming offers us a little
more peace and quiet. So get out and try it
(00:44):
a little bit. And thank you for being here, for
allowing us to show up in your life each and
every week. This week, we're excited to sit down with
Amy Margoliese, a cancer survivor and the CEO of Sunshine Theory,
a coaching platform dedicated to helping cancer survivors rediscover strength,
purpose and joy after their battle. She was a successful
(01:07):
leading digital advertiser at Google, and she faced her own
life altering battle with breast cancer. Her experience reshaped her mission,
pushing her to create a space where survivors can embrace
their post traumatic growth and build a new vision for
their future. And I came across that, and I've heard
a lot about, you know, people fighting back on cancer
(01:28):
and how many people say it redefined their life. You know,
we had Josh Shuber a few weeks ago now at
this point sharing that same story, and I thought, what
a great follow up to that is not just winning
the battle with cancer, but what do we do afterwards?
And I think so many of us, even if we're
not fighting cancer, just battles in our lives, Like we
focus so hard on overcoming this battle or winning this thing,
(01:50):
and a lot of times once it's over, we're left
with this void of what do I do next? How
do I perform? What am I supposed to be doing?
Who am I? So I'm excited to sit down and
share this story with Amy, with you all, and I
want to thank you before we get to it. I
want to thank you that have jumped over to YouTube
and subscribed and shared our channels there have followed us
(02:11):
on Instagram to where you can see that the shorter
clips of the shows each and every week, and to
thank you for helping us build our brand and our
community with the goal in mind of not being the biggest,
but being the most impactful podcast in the world, the
one that puts smiles on people's faces, that gets them
thinking differently, maybe get some reminding of promises they left
(02:35):
unanswered or things they're supposed to be doing, but maybe
they just kind of lost their way. So I want
to thank you for being part of that movement, thank
you for being part of our community, and I hope
you enjoy this week's interview with Amy Margalisee. Enjoy the show.
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(03:19):
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your service. Visit honor the Brave dot com. We've got
your six, Amy, my newest friend. Welcome to the On
Purpose podcast. It's a pleasure to have you here. And
I got to start by asking how are you doing today?
Speaker 2 (03:37):
I'm doing great.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
I always share start my day with a little bit
of me time. So whether that's you know, taking a
breath and taking my dog for a long walk, or
if it's going to play tennis, which is one of
my big passions, I always try to make sure I
start my day with something that's gonna fill me and
set the mood for the day.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
So I am in a good mood.
Speaker 1 (04:01):
I love it. I love it. So now you're playing tennis,
so you're a traditionalist. You haven't converted to pickleball yet.
Speaker 3 (04:07):
Well, this is how I look at it. I love tennis.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
Pickle Ball's fun for social one is one is my sport.
One is fun social play.
Speaker 1 (04:19):
Okay, So if I show up and I'm hanging out
with pickleball, Amy, We're gonna laugh and have fun. But
tennis Amy is gonna try to beat me.
Speaker 2 (04:28):
That's right, That's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
All right, Well.
Speaker 2 (04:34):
But I will nail that overhead in pickleball too.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Oh yeah, yeah, you got You got to hit some
people with the ball every now and then. That's the joy. Yes,
I mean so then what does podcast Amy show up as?
Speaker 2 (04:48):
So podcast Amy, you're gonna get both. You get the
real Amy. We're I'm a mixed bag, you know.
Speaker 1 (04:55):
I love it. So I gotta be watching out for
that overhead slam. Make sure I don't get hit in
the mouth.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
No, I'm friendly.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
I love it. Amy. I want to thank you for
what you're doing. I want to thank you for one
for the battle you fought, and now two for what
you're doing to prepare people for life after their battles
are won. And like I was sharing with you, what
caught my eye about your story was I was thinking
in life to so many of us have obstacles to
overcome big challenges, big hurdles, and we put so much
(05:24):
energy and effort into it that a lot of times
when we beat it, when we overcome it, we have
this steep drop off of Wow, what's next. I put
so much time and energy and effort, I've kind of
forgotten who I am, and you're equipping people to begin
again that it's not the end of anything.
Speaker 2 (05:43):
That's right.
Speaker 3 (05:45):
So I'll just start with a brief overview of my
own journey and how I came to this insight of
where we needed that second, you know, second boost of help.
I always say there's there's two you know what now
moments for cancer survivors or anybody going through some sort
(06:08):
of traumatic event, whether it's a divorce or losing a.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Job, et cetera.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
It's I find with my clients it's very you know,
similar in terms of the experience physically mentally, obviously it's
different things. But the what the what now is you
know when you first when I was first diagnosed with cancer,
and this is most people unless you have been through
(06:33):
it with somebody else, But you know, I was what now,
I'm diagnosed with cancer and I don't even know what
doctors to call, I don't know what treatment options.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
You know, you just don't know anything.
Speaker 3 (06:49):
So that's a first scary moment when you're first diagnosed.
You kind of I always say, you don't know what
you need to know until you need to know it. Yeah, right,
So all of a sudden, now I'm learning about breast
cancer and treatment options and what kind of doctors to see.
And when I was diagnosed, it was a month after
(07:09):
finding out I was pregnant with my third child, so
I had the added complexity of also having, you know,
working with a high risk abgistetrician, you know, seeing if
we keep the baby. There were a lot of very
heavy decisions that had to be made. Ultimately, I did
find a oncologist who specialized in working with young pregnant
(07:34):
women diagnosed with cancer, and she gave me that clarity,
that breakthrough that I needed to move forward with my
plan and treatment that was safe while pregnant.
Speaker 2 (07:47):
And then we did all the heavy stuff afterwards. So
that was my clarity moment.
Speaker 1 (07:53):
Let me stop you that, because I want to get
to the heavy stuff. But first I like to warm
you up. I don't like to just jump into it.
We got to have a little rapid fire warm up
so we get to know what you're saying to do
it you ready, and then then just like you're just
like you did there, you went out sought help, you
sot some different opinions and then you got to the
heavy stuff. We're gonna do that right now. Are you
(08:14):
ready for this? Let's go, Amy.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
How about you're gonna slam some the overheads at me.
Speaker 1 (08:21):
Let's do this. What Amy, What's what's the best one
word description of you?
Speaker 2 (08:30):
Positive?
Speaker 1 (08:31):
I like that one? What makes you say that so quickly?
Speaker 3 (08:36):
It's it's just the vibe that is always around me.
It's what got me through treatment. Mindset is something that
I work first with all my clients, like getting in
the right mindset to.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Open yourself up. But yeah, I see.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I like to see things in a positive way because
other ways you're going down the hill, you know.
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Yeah, for sure. What's the favorite quote or quo that's
stuck with you throughout life?
Speaker 3 (09:02):
Oh gosh, I now have to think.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
I don't want to.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
Mess it up because I do write this and I think.
Speaker 2 (09:11):
About this a lot.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
Yeah, but it's actually an old Michael Jordan quote and
it talks about kind of resilience and I love it.
He says, I've missed more than nine thousand shots in
my career. I've lost more than three hundred games. I've
failed over and over again in my life, and that's
(09:33):
why I succeed. I love that one because again, it
talks about resilience, it talks about not you know, you
learn from everything that happens in your life. I you know,
I never say look back, and you never say would have,
could have, should have.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
It's really take.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
Any of those moments, what do you learn and what's
going to catapult you even higher?
Speaker 1 (09:58):
I love it already, Amy, We're already on right foot.
Anybody could quote Michael Jordan's a friend of mine. All right,
all right, if your life had a theme song, what
would your song be?
Speaker 2 (10:14):
Girls?
Speaker 3 (10:14):
Just want to have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Sydney Lauper? Why she hit that?
Speaker 3 (10:21):
My mom and I it's it's a memory from my
childhood and I do it with my daughter now. So
it's kind of you know, that theme through life. We
just get up and dance and laugh and smile like
that's what life is, right Like it should be fun.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
We live here, why not have fun?
Speaker 1 (10:38):
You know that song is so goofy, youet so catchy
that I wonder if she had any right, like, had
any idea when she made it, because I was like
eighty four or somethimes a while ago that it would
survive like so long and still have an impact.
Speaker 2 (10:53):
Like you're saying, yeah, it's a classic.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
It is, all right, what's your favorite book or a
book that you're currently reading either, Oh well.
Speaker 2 (11:02):
I'm currently reading Outlive by Peter Ashia. I forget how
to say his last name exactly, you might want.
Speaker 3 (11:10):
To, but it's called Outlive and it really it's so
interesting because it talks about training for your centennial, like
you're moving into your hundreds, right, Like the overall theme
is when we move, you know, when we move towards
(11:32):
the end of our lives, most people expect to have
a downward spiral of some sort, whether it's memory, it's physical,
et cetera.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
And what he talks about is.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Why should we expect the last five ten years of
our life to be where we can't pick up our grandkids,
we can't walk upstairs, you know, all of these things,
and it's really training your body for those moments, right,
like you you should have just a rap decline at
the end. Maybe it's maybe it's a week, maybe it's
(12:03):
a month, but it shouldn't be five ten years where
you're debilitated. And it talks, you know, it talks about
all of the Horsemen, right, like the chronic diseases that
are impacting America and the world so much right now.
So I find that book very interesting. I read a
lot of those books, and yeah, I have you know,
(12:26):
I have other favorite books from historical but I do
like to read fiction.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
Yeah, I love that's good. What's uh? You could have
dinner with one person they could have passed or still
be with us, Amy, who would you want to have
dinner with? And what would you want to ask them?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Oh gosh, I've done these conversations at different tables during
my career and they're always intriguing. You have to give
me a minute on this one. I have to think,
because this one changes depending on like where I am
in my.
Speaker 1 (12:59):
Life, I know, but lob smashing aim, he doesn't have
this much time.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
I know. I would probably say. I always thought like.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Maybe like someone really really spiritual and like connected, like
like a Gandhi. Yeah, someone like that. That that is
just so insightful because I think having those insights and
sharing insights is so interesting and it gets me thinking
(13:39):
a lot. So I think those could be really interesting conversations.
Speaker 1 (13:44):
Yeah, for sure. And I think I love what you
said there and It reminds me of I would say
almost everybody that comes to this community. One trait we
all have in common is we live curiously and we're
always intrigued. Love that. I love that right to learn
something new and have these conversations. So I am excited
Amy to get to your conversation. If you feel warmed up, now,
(14:07):
are you ready to go on this?
Speaker 2 (14:09):
I'm ready. What I do all day every day.
Speaker 1 (14:12):
I love it, Amy, So talk to us about how
your battle with cancer shifted your perspective on like success, happiness,
and your own fulfillment.
Speaker 2 (14:23):
Yeah. Absolutely, So.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
It was a challenge, and I do work with a
lot of women, like high performing career women.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Who are going through these different challenges in life.
Speaker 3 (14:36):
And the reason I point that out is because I
had been working at a you know, very high stress,
high leveled career at Google when I was diagnosed with cancer.
So I think that was really hard, and I think
it's a big challenge for women who are so driven,
especially in our society that we have now. I think,
(15:00):
you know, like modern society really kind of drives that,
you know, burnout almost in women where you're you're having
this high pressure that you have to deal with and
for me to step away from that to deal with
my cancer. I knew I had to take a leaf
(15:21):
from work, and that was really hard for me to
go from you know, pressure and like always driving and
always action to actually having to like realize, Okay, what
does self care mean? I need to turn inward and
focus on myself. Like if I need to lay down
on a couch for a day, don't feel guilty, Like
that's what your body needs that day.
Speaker 2 (15:42):
You need rest.
Speaker 3 (15:44):
So it really kind of pivoted me to see the
importance of those kind of moments. You know, I always
understood food, and I always understood you know, exercise and
those things that are still.
Speaker 2 (16:00):
Very very important.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
But I think it was that pause and instead of
focusing outward, focusing inward. It was a big pivot and
a big understanding.
Speaker 1 (16:10):
What was Was there a moment where you realized that
had been kind of a missing piece for you? Was
that because it sounds that I've been reading a lot
and studying a lot, and we're really kind of shifting
away from this hustle and grind culture that kind of
permeated most of our working at the time. Right liked
take breaks. Right, the busier you are the better you are.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Correct.
Speaker 1 (16:33):
Was there a moment when you realized, like, wait a second,
I have to focus on me.
Speaker 2 (16:41):
Yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (16:42):
It was when I had to speak to my my
leaders at the time and tell them, you know, I
need to take a leave because I don't know how
I'm feeling each day. I don't know, you know, when
I need to go into hospital or not. So it
(17:03):
was that conversation, in that moment when I was like, okay,
I'm doing this like I need to.
Speaker 1 (17:09):
Yeah, how was that received?
Speaker 3 (17:12):
It was received so well. You know, I had I
had incredible leaders at the time. One of my bosses
at the time actually his wife also had gone through cancer,
so he was very understanding from that side as well
and helpful.
Speaker 2 (17:27):
But yeah, it was. It was a big shift for me.
Speaker 3 (17:31):
I always, you know, I always prioritized my team's you know,
health and well being, and I wasn't really focusing on
me as much, you know.
Speaker 2 (17:41):
But yeah, it was.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
It was that moment when I realized, Okay, this is
this is where we have to pivot.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
And you mentioned something earlier I want to dive into you.
You had mentioned about women in the workplace, specifically having
difficulty coming to this decision. Yeah, do you think that's
different than if a guy has cancer at or from
your experience and what you went through, tell me, like,
what would be different there?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
You know, I think it's hard to say specifically because
I think everybody, everybody deals with a diagnosis so differently.
Some people are ready to talk about it right away.
Some people can't deal with everything until years after. So
I do think it's a very individualized thing. I don't
want to say necessarily women to men. I know, historically
(18:28):
we have seen you know, more men in leadership roles,
and you know there there definitely is that aspect, and
I do I think, you know, sometimes women, it could
be harder. You're you're a little bit nervous, like if
you're in line for you know, the next job, or
you know, you could be nervous about saying, you know,
(18:49):
I need to take this time and realize it could
mean you know, you know, not as quick of a
rise or a setback to your career.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Yeah, And that's what I was wondering is if like
if you felt or and women in general might feel like, Okay,
if I take this time off, I may never get
back to this level again, right, right? And did that
factor into your decision making of like, if I step away,
will I ever get to this point again professionally?
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Yeah, you know, I've always been career driven and love
you know, doing things that make an impact. I love
seeing that. That's why I love my work today, which
I pivoted to. But yeah, I mean, I it would
have been a concern of mine. But I'll tell you honestly,
like when I had to make that decision, and when
(19:41):
I was going through these much bigger life decisions, I
realized that life decisions are way, way, way more important
than anything a career could give me.
Speaker 2 (19:54):
I was fighting for my life.
Speaker 3 (19:56):
I was fighting for my children's life, and that's what
took priority.
Speaker 1 (20:01):
Yeah, it's such a good shift in perspective writing.
Speaker 2 (20:04):
Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1 (20:05):
And did you find really is did you find that
that shift in perspective not just focused on your work
but opened up a whole bunch of other ways of
looking at things?
Speaker 2 (20:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (20:16):
Absolutely, It's what I You know, I work on my
Like I said in the beginning, I work on mindset
first with everybody. I think I have actually a program
called flipping the script, And I said that all the time.
Speaker 2 (20:31):
I'm like, we have to flip the script. You have
to flip the script.
Speaker 3 (20:34):
On this and it is it's it's so simplistic, but
it really is something that you need to do for
it to become a habit, right, Like a lot of
people are so quick to look at the negative side
or sometimes in culture, I feel I don't know if
you see this or feel this too, but I feel
like almost like people like you start a conversation and
(20:54):
it's like complaining about things is.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
The conversation and it's not. You know, it's like all the.
Speaker 3 (21:01):
Weather sucks today, or you know, like, yeah, I had
to do that, but it really was hard.
Speaker 2 (21:06):
It sucked, you know what. You know, my car's broken again.
Speaker 3 (21:10):
You know, you could talk about all those things, or
you could just shift the way you talk. Sometimes even
just putting a smile on your face changes the outcome
of what you're gonna say, what you're going to feel.
So there are a lot of things around mindset, and
like I said, I have a positive mindset, but it's
how to teach other people that they.
Speaker 2 (21:30):
Too can look at things differently.
Speaker 3 (21:32):
And I know we talked about some books before, but
one of the one of my favorite books around this is.
Speaker 2 (21:40):
It's The Happiness Formula.
Speaker 3 (21:43):
Have You by mogwat He's he was an ex Google employee,
wrote this book.
Speaker 2 (21:50):
But it's really about how you can look at things differently.
Speaker 1 (21:54):
I've not read I've heard of it, i haven't read it.
So how do you catch yourself then? Amy when you
wake up and you're like, okay, today's not like I
just don't feel like. Some days you get up and
it's easy. Other days you're like, okay, this is a
work in progress here, yep. How do you reframe things?
How do you get yourself allow yourself to one to
have that space, and a two to move past it.
Speaker 3 (22:16):
Yeah, so the first thing you said is exactly what
I do. I allow myself to feel it. You know,
if I am tired one day and it's just kind
of rainy and you know that kind of thing, maybe
I'll go for a walk in the rain or sit
next to the rain, so instead of it being like
gloomy and depressing, it's actually like refreshing and nice to
(22:39):
be able to watch it or feel it. But that's
the important thing, right, is giving yourself the space for it,
but not sitting in it.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Right.
Speaker 3 (22:50):
You don't, I don't want to you don't want to
sit in that feeling for too long.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
You do wanna It's.
Speaker 3 (22:56):
It's not that you can't have any negative feelings, because
we have to have different kinds of feelings and we're
going to feel different. But the important thing is not
sitting in it and then being able to, you know,
embrace and get out and move forward again.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
That's the important thing.
Speaker 1 (23:16):
Yeah, I agree with you wholeheartedly there. And I was
always thinking about that when I haven't always been the
best at this, for sure in my life, and when
I denied how I felt, it usually spirals, it does, right,
it becomes something way bigger. Man, if ID just dealt
with this at the beginning, had been so much easier.
Speaker 3 (23:34):
Yep, absolutely absolutely, And I think that too, right, Like
we were talking about, you know, the beginning of my
journey and going through it.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
But I think that's the biggest thing that I saw.
Speaker 3 (23:46):
Coming out of my treatment was you know, I had
the baby and then was back on all the hard stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
Again and got through that.
Speaker 3 (23:57):
And I still remember, I remember the moment when you're
asking about moments, this one I is so clear to me.
I remember sitting in my oncollege's office and she goes Okay,
it's your last confusion today.
Speaker 2 (24:10):
And I looked at her and I was like, what,
you know, what's next? That's the question. What's next?
Speaker 3 (24:16):
Like you're so used to doctors and nurses telling you
where to be, how you're going to feel. You get
print outs on you know these this is how you're
going to feel, and you have to be in here Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday.
You know, you're always scheduled and getting through it, and
then at the end, it just felt like, you know,
you're dropped. It's like, oh, yeah, I'm this new person.
(24:36):
I just went through all of this treatment, and how
do I come back into the world. And I felt,
you know, there was some support, but you know it
was you know, there's a counselor who you can meet
with maybe once a month or every once in a while,
or it's it's with people who haven't been through it
(24:57):
and don't understand going through that kind of trauma.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
And I think, you know, that's where I saw.
Speaker 3 (25:05):
Immediately, I was like, oh my gosh, there's there's this
dropped feeling and I don't feel support. And I immediately
went and I signed up and I I got certified
and in functional medicine and into in nutrition and all
this stuff. I just really just dove in and I said,
(25:26):
there's no support. I mean, there's so much confusion on
what can.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
I what do I eat? What's going to cause? What
could You're just anything to.
Speaker 3 (25:37):
Stop reoccurrence from happening, right, It's like you're scared.
Speaker 2 (25:42):
There's a fear. So many people have coming out of it.
Speaker 1 (25:46):
And I love which and that's one of the things
I love about you and me and what attracted me
that I want to have this conversation is you see
a problem. You don't just want to be the problem.
You're like, wait, I can solve this. Yeah, So so
talk me through that train position though, because I think
you hit it on the head. A lot of us
will get to that point where we do feel like
whatever support we had, whatever we're fighting for, is over.
(26:07):
We're no longer part of that team because we beat it.
So we moved on and we don't know what the
hell to do now? What is that void?
Speaker 3 (26:15):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (26:15):
Taught me through that emotional transition of picking yourself up
and going wait a second, I will take on this challenge.
Speaker 2 (26:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (26:24):
I think that is a part of me. I've always
been a problem solver. Right in my career, it was
one of you know, besides working with my team and
mentoring and growing a team, which I love doing, but
I also love to identify problems and figure out there
are better ways to do things, to streamline things, to
(26:45):
make it more efficient. And I think I carry that
same behavior over to this I in life.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Right, So I did.
Speaker 3 (26:55):
I knew I felt a gap, and I started reaching
out to their cancer survivors patients that I knew, and
I was like, hey, you know, what are you doing
afterwards or how are you feeling, and just kind of
checking in with with different people and seeing, you know,
does everybody feel this?
Speaker 2 (27:15):
And it was it was it's a big gap, you know.
I started searching around.
Speaker 3 (27:18):
For support or you know how like personalized, right personalized
to me because everybody is bio unique, so it's you know,
putting one blanket diet over everybody is never going to work.
Putting a blanket theme over everybody's not going to work, right,
So the importance for that individualized, personalized support is was
(27:44):
completely missing. So I knew that it was something I needed.
I then talking to others it was something that they
needed and we kind of grew from there.
Speaker 1 (27:56):
Yeah, let's follow up. That was my next question I
had for the importance of community when you are redefining
yourself and beginning to talk to me about that, What
have you've learned from your community, both about yourself and
about them and how we can better serve Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
So I think, you know, just seeing consistently across the
board that yes, we are bio unique in our bodies,
but emotionally, yes, there are different ways and different things,
but we're all. Everybody has gone through trauma and going
through trauma, there are you know, very similar themes that
(28:41):
go across everybody, and I think that's what brings this
community and the people that I surround myself with together. Supportive,
incredibly supportive, never never judgment. I you know, there's no judgment.
You are who you are, and I of you.
Speaker 2 (29:00):
Because you are you, you.
Speaker 3 (29:01):
Know, and it's it's really I'm you know, I would
say I have, you know, a.
Speaker 2 (29:08):
Diverse group of people.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
But there's certain characteristics to everybody, and I think that
overall theme is just kindness, right, is supporting and being
kind to each other and letting people be who they are.
I just I just see so much wonderful connections through that.
Speaker 1 (29:30):
And that interesting, right, it's still a battle for your
life and they battle for their life. And now you
find that actually people are very kind.
Speaker 3 (29:39):
Yeah, and I think you know you hear this often,
but having lived through it, I can honestly tell you
when you are faced with the near death experience, when
you come out on the other side, prioritization of what's
important in life completely changes. I always say, I don't
(30:00):
know if I'm allowed to swear it's a past all right,
good good, no family ratings, but I always say it's.
Speaker 2 (30:16):
I just lost my track of thought.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
You're gonna cuss at me, so I was getting ready
to dodge that.
Speaker 2 (30:20):
I know that happens too. Oh.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
It's all about giving less fucks in life, you know,
And I truly believe that. Like before, let anything like
sometimes stress me or you know, expectations or people saying
do you have to.
Speaker 2 (30:38):
Do this and this, and it's it's.
Speaker 3 (30:41):
Not important right now, right like, I don't need that
stress right now. We'll figure that out when it comes.
And you know, I prioritize my friendships, my connections, my people.
I prioritize my family. You know, you really do you
realize what matters, and like I said, giving less fucks, Like, Okay,
that's not important right now. I don't want to stress
(31:03):
about that. That's ruining my energy, you know. So it's
learning what to say no to. And I also believe
in saying yes to more. I always say yes to
things because there's so often, so many times you're invited
to something and it's okay if you don't have.
Speaker 2 (31:22):
The energy for real and you say no. But trying
to say yes.
Speaker 3 (31:27):
To more, like you could sit on the couch and
be home, or you could have this amazing experience and
meet like new people, or find something you'd love to do.
Speaker 2 (31:35):
So I love saying yes to as much as I can.
Speaker 1 (31:39):
All Right, I want to know what's one of the
most surprising things you said yes to?
Speaker 2 (31:45):
My husband?
Speaker 1 (31:46):
No, you are a way out of his league right now.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
No, totally kidding. My husband's very supportive and great. But
I think I think I'll tell you. I we were
looking for a move.
Speaker 3 (32:06):
After my battle and everything. I just I just needed
something new and to experience something new, that's what feeds me.
Speaker 2 (32:16):
And we did. We made an out of state move.
We went from New Jersey to Florida. And you know,
I said, yes, let's do this.
Speaker 3 (32:24):
Let's you know, there's so many reasons why not, but
there's one big reason why. So I said, let's do
this same thing with having our third child. Our other
two were seven and ten at the time, and we
were almost we were almost out of it, and I said,
let's do this.
Speaker 1 (32:44):
Yea, yeah.
Speaker 3 (32:46):
So I think I always joke in some way, and
like when when life is very calm, I tend to
throw something into it to drive that chaos again. But
you know, I think it's again and just say yes,
like let that chaos.
Speaker 2 (33:02):
Figure your way through it.
Speaker 3 (33:04):
It builds resilience, it builds strength, that builds, it builds
so much like if you're not saying yes and experiencing
these new.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
Things, how do you know, how are you going to grow?
So that's how I live my life.
Speaker 1 (33:17):
I love it. How has that changed your parenting?
Speaker 2 (33:24):
I think it shows my kids.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
Like one thing I'll talk about, like the move right,
like moving out of state. It was a little harder
for my oldest but since everybody's been here, like everybody's
embraced the change. I think they see me you know,
being having been you know, being a working mom and
being able to do all these things and make a difference.
(33:49):
I think it's I see myself as being a good
role model for them. And you know, I talked to
my kids all the time. I said, you know, you
guys are so lucky today because when when people moved
when we were younger, they moved unless your parents were
super close or there was some way you see them
once a year, but they're pretty much they moved, you know,
(34:12):
I said, Today, you guys have FaceTime. You can talk
to your friends all the time and hang out with
them and have friends here and have friends in different countries.
Speaker 2 (34:22):
Like it's a different world. It's way more connected.
Speaker 3 (34:25):
So I think, you know, opening their eyes to seeing,
you know, what they have available to them and how
they can stay connected, is you know, really important and
something that they have really grasped to continue to grow
your network with good people.
Speaker 1 (34:43):
Yeah, and I sense you're very humble. I mean, I
appreciate that about you, But I would I would add
that I without knowing your kids, I would bet they
see that their mom is fearless and that she tags
things head on. And if mom can fight this battle
and wake up the next thing and say hey, we're
gonna through this bad I guess what, We're gonna move
(35:03):
and create more stuff for us to deal with. You're
teaching them to be fearless, right, and to embrace uncertainty
in life, and that we don't have to have all
the answers all the time, right, that's right. One of
the things that society now we're over analytical. We've got
all this information, but sometimes it paralyzes us because we
don't act. Absolutely right, you don't have to have all
(35:23):
the answers. You just got to go and like you said,
if you surround yourself with good people you believe in yourself,
you're gonna end up in a great spot.
Speaker 2 (35:33):
You're right, yep.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
And often so your network too, you know, supporting each other,
lifting each other up. It opens you to new opportunities,
new connections. So yeah, I definitely definitely agree with what
you just said.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
Well, I hope so, because that's talking about you. Yeah.
And the other thing you do amy right there is
when you make that change, you create new schals.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Yeah, yes, right.
Speaker 1 (36:03):
And one of the one of the things that drives
me crazy is when people are still stuck in believing
and doing the exact same thing they've been doing for
years with no room for growth.
Speaker 2 (36:13):
Right, I agree, it's that stuck.
Speaker 3 (36:17):
It's that and that's often where I'll see clients come
to me after coming out of treatment or you know,
some sort of trauma come down, you know, a couple
of months, a couple of years later after and that's
exactly what what it is.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
They're stuck.
Speaker 3 (36:36):
They're stuck, don't know how to change, don't know how
to make something different, And it's this, it's this continual cycle.
But like you said, if you keep doing the same things,
you're gonna be stuck. It's gonna nothing's gonna move, nothing's
gonna change unless you are the one making that happen.
Speaker 1 (36:58):
Yeah. And what I love about what you're doing and
people that do push that envelope a little bit is
it opens up other people's eyes to what's possible.
Speaker 2 (37:08):
Yeah. Yeah, it's like a lead by example for sure.
So you know.
Speaker 1 (37:13):
Yeah, So let's talk about resilience, right, because you speak
a lot about that in your post traumatic growth. Yeah.
How do you define resilience and then how do you
practice that?
Speaker 2 (37:25):
Yeah?
Speaker 3 (37:26):
Resilience is the ability to you know, move through challenges,
hard challenges and be able to come out you know,
stronger and better from learning from you know, those challenges,
and you keep building on that and you become stronger,
(37:49):
you become more knowledgeable, and that's just you know, the
power of.
Speaker 2 (37:54):
Resilience is to be able to move through it.
Speaker 3 (37:56):
And you know something that I was always told, you know,
my superpower was when when I.
Speaker 2 (38:03):
Was working, and.
Speaker 3 (38:06):
You know, they'd say leading with with you know, calm
in the face of the storm. Right, it's being able
to to you know, take that challenge, not freak out
and go crazy, but like say, Okay, this is what's
in front of me. This is how we're going to
move through it, and then learning and being able to
(38:28):
be one level higher.
Speaker 2 (38:29):
The next time a challenge comes. So really understanding.
Speaker 3 (38:35):
You know, it's not crazy, it's just this is something
that's in front of me today, or this is something
that's in front of me now, let's deal with it, right,
That's the only way to move forward is to deal
with it.
Speaker 2 (38:48):
So whether you deal with.
Speaker 3 (38:49):
It and you're like stressed and crazy or you know,
you can have some of that energy in you. Don't
get me wrong, I get I have anxiety, I have fears,
But it's how you deal with those that's the important part.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
Yeah, too many people think that having fear is a
bad thing. I think that I always shift if having
fear is a great thing, right, Because if I'm that
pushes you, it's gonna make you make decisions. If I'm afraid,
that means I usually care about something. Yes, Yeah, it's
hard to be afraid of ship you don't care about
who cares.
Speaker 3 (39:27):
That's what my my husband always tells my son before
going out, you know, before a big match or.
Speaker 2 (39:32):
You know, whatever sport he's doing. He's like, I'm nervous.
He's like, Okay, then you're ready. You're ready, you know.
Speaker 3 (39:41):
Yeah, that adrenaline is something you need to go out there.
Speaker 2 (39:46):
So yeah, embracing those moments.
Speaker 1 (39:48):
Yeah, So how do you say, say, we're talking and
I'm just I'm so afraid of what's next. I'm afraid
to make this big decision. But it's pretty obvious to
the people around me, but I just can't take action.
How would you coach them through? What steps would you
say to be able to practice becoming more resilient and
to believing in yourself that you can recreate yourself.
Speaker 3 (40:09):
Essentially, Yeah, I think you know, the first step is really.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
Really just identifying and.
Speaker 3 (40:20):
Understanding the healing through what that trauma was. Right, let's
talk about it. Let's you know, you have to bring
it into the open. I think before you were saying,
like so many people don't talk about things and they
bury things and it becomes a bigger snowball.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
Right, so we have to stop the snowball.
Speaker 3 (40:37):
First, let's heal through the trauma. And then like I said,
the number one thing that I work on first is
the mindset. Mindset is so critical in everything moving forward.
It's your motivation, it's your willingness to Then we move
into you know, how to heal your body through different
foods and importance of strength training. But without that mindset,
(41:03):
the motivation and the willing and the understanding of how
to recreate yourself doesn't happen. So then we work on
mindset and it is about you know, those just simple
things like flipping the script, how the brain works, you know,
with the fight or flight when that comes up. So
we really dive into mindset first, and that's that's what
(41:26):
we would work on first, and then moving through like
I said, looking at individuals, this is like the super
personalized part where it's what diet is going to help you.
And this is where I really focus on chronic disease
prevention because that is the biggest problem that we have
(41:47):
today in America is these chronic disease is just catapulting.
So really identifying strength training and the right diet that
is going to help prevent those chronic diseases. And then
the final part that I focus on, and this is
like the most rewarding part, is Okay, now we have
(42:09):
all that set. Now you're in a good space, you're
in a healthy mindset. What's next where you can grow
to And that's the fun part. Like people I'm like, okay,
this was your old life before.
Speaker 2 (42:21):
What didn't you like? What do you like?
Speaker 3 (42:24):
What makes you feel good? And that's the explosive part, right,
Like I have seen people leave and just completely like
pivot careers or make a move like we did, and
just understanding that like you have the freedom to do that,
you can make these things happen if if we you.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Know, just do it.
Speaker 1 (42:45):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (42:47):
Yeah, So that's that's essentially, you know, the kind of
the healing framework that we work through. I have, you know,
I have mini courses that clients look at, like you know,
sugar detox and just working on the mindset, but really
like to deep dive and see that transformation.
Speaker 2 (43:05):
It's moving through all of those parts.
Speaker 1 (43:08):
I love it. When did you realize that your journey
need to be shared, that your journey needed to be
calm the sunshine theory.
Speaker 3 (43:17):
Yeah, it wasn't until after my treatment was done. So
I I often found it overwhelming to talk about constantly,
you know, my treatment, how I was feeling, what was
going on. You know, I would I would share updates
(43:37):
obviously with friends and family, but it was too overwhelming.
Speaker 2 (43:41):
To understand what was happening until after my treatment.
Speaker 3 (43:45):
So it was it was so I finished my treatment
in August of.
Speaker 2 (43:52):
Twenty twenty.
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Mind you COVID, right, we're in COVID error craziness. And
I actually gave birth to my daughter in the beginning
of April, right when the world shut down, and I
was positive with COVID. So that was a whole nother thing.
But it wasn't until I moved through all of my
treatment at the end of August. It was then it
(44:16):
was that time around the holidays. I started thinking, you know,
it was like I felt dropped. I was just sitting
here and that's when I took action, Like it's said before,
I took action, and I started these courses and I
started really deep dive, you know, learning into the areas
that I needed to go deeper into.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
And that's kind of what I did.
Speaker 3 (44:37):
I just I just really dove into it and wanted
to learn as much as I could to be able
to help others because I knew what it felt like,
you know, being left and lost, and I wanted to
help others, Like you shouldn't feel that way when you
have just survived this. You know, you just fought this
(45:00):
incredible battle, and you shouldn't have fought that incredible battle
to return to a life.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
That doesn't make you happy.
Speaker 3 (45:08):
And that's the biggest thing I always it's writing your
next chapter.
Speaker 2 (45:14):
You get to write it. How would you write your
story if it you know, to make you happy, to
make you grow, to keep you excited and thriving, Like
those are really the important things because that's what you
fought for.
Speaker 1 (45:32):
Yeah, no, Amy, you're saying that, And I'm thinking to
our veteran community out there, because we're heavily involved in
the veterans and how many of them suffer kind of
the same mental block, right they come home from fighting
for their country and fighting a war to a world
that doesn't make sense to them and that they struggle
to relate back to. And I think you're right. A
(45:52):
lot of times it's because we don't give ourselves permission
to become new.
Speaker 3 (45:58):
Right, Right, you come back, it's a different life. The
world has moved on, things have changed. Yeah, I could
definitely see that. Like I said, I think the trauma
across the board. There's differences, of course, and there's a uniqueness,
but when you look at the whole thing, it's the
(46:18):
same feelings.
Speaker 2 (46:19):
It's the same path that you need to go through
for change.
Speaker 1 (46:23):
And I think one of the best things we can
do is have conversations about it.
Speaker 2 (46:29):
Yeah, I agree. I say, like, look at when we
grew up right, nobody.
Speaker 3 (46:34):
Talked about depression, anxiety, you know, all these different feelings
that people have.
Speaker 2 (46:41):
And it is positive that it has.
Speaker 3 (46:43):
Become more of a mainstream topic, for sure, But I
agree we need more and more voices out there talking
about the reality of this, you know. I it's something
I see in like comments that come back on some
of the posts I do on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (46:58):
They're like, wow, you hit the new l on the head.
Speaker 3 (47:01):
Oh, I never knew anybody else felt like this.
Speaker 2 (47:05):
You know, it's just like, Okay.
Speaker 3 (47:06):
I'm not I'm not weird or I'm not like feeling anything.
You know, you're that is a normal thing. You're allowed
to feel that. And yeah, I think the more people talking,
it's it's so critical.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
One of the things I always try to keep people
from doing is getting in this trauma comparison right where, yes,
well I can't speak out because I didn't battle cancer,
so I can only listen to amy. I don't have
a voice. But no, all of us have gone through something, yes, right,
and we don't have to.
Speaker 2 (47:39):
Do this conversation yesterday.
Speaker 1 (47:41):
Really, how did it go?
Speaker 3 (47:44):
So it it went well because I was able to
show the person so we're talking about they were complaining
they had just gone through a stroke and a heart attack, right,
Like that's pretty serious too, And they're like, you know, oh,
(48:05):
I'm feeling this way, but I shouldn't complain because you
went through cancer and pregnancy and everything. And I stopped
them right there and I said that doesn't matter. I said,
your trauma is your trauma. I said, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2 (48:19):
How I felt. Let's talk about you.
Speaker 3 (48:22):
You know this is what you felt, and these are
real feelings you felt, so let's talk about that. It's
not it's not a comparison. I hate that too.
Speaker 1 (48:29):
Yeah, that whole comparison is the thief of joy. Right,
And it's not just comparison comparing ourselves to what people have,
but sometimes we're comparing ourselves to what people have gone
through and minimizing our own emotions.
Speaker 3 (48:42):
And right or expectations of how you should be. Right,
like it is, it's comparison comparison.
Speaker 2 (48:52):
We both had a problem with that.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
Way because I've dodged that lob. I know it's coming
at me here in a minute.
Speaker 3 (49:01):
Yeah, it's that, and it's it's you know, trying to
live up to other people's expectations.
Speaker 2 (49:08):
All of that wipe it out for sure. Do you
and do what feels good to you.
Speaker 1 (49:14):
And that's it, man, So true, Amy, I love it
because here's here's the reality is we're all unique, every
one of us, and if you don't step into your uniqueness,
the world will lose out on it when you go away.
Speaker 2 (49:28):
That's right, that's right. You're here for a reason, right, Yeah,
and yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:36):
And the goal is to get to the end and
have it all stored up. It's to get to the
end and go. Man, I gave it all the way.
Speaker 2 (49:43):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (49:43):
Yeah, So Amy, answer this for me. How would you
suggest or tips, practical tips for people that are struggling
maybe to find a purpose after winning their battle. What
are some things you'd recommend to help build confidence and
find direct in life?
Speaker 3 (50:00):
Again, Yeah, I think confidence comes from doing you have
to do to build up your confidence. So that's that's
the first thing there. And I think you know, finding
purpose is sitting down sometimes.
Speaker 2 (50:18):
I think of like this Venn diagram.
Speaker 3 (50:21):
Right, it's it's what people say you're good at, what
you enjoy doing, and where there's a need right right
in that center is you know where your purpose lies
and it is it's it's journaling. We do it through journaling,
through mindfulness, through you know, prompt questions and work through
(50:46):
that to find what.
Speaker 2 (50:47):
What excites you.
Speaker 3 (50:48):
It's it's often a gut feeling, too, right, I say,
listen to your gut. Like people come to me and
they're like, I'm really excited for a job. For instance,
I'm really excited about this job, but I'm not sure
if I should do this, And I'll tell them I'll say, Okay,
tell me about each each option that you have, and
this could be for anything.
Speaker 2 (51:07):
Talk to me about each option, and I can hear
it in their voice.
Speaker 3 (51:11):
They're like, oh my gosh, it's growing and it's so
fun and you can do this and this, But I
think I should really stay at my job because it's
more money, and.
Speaker 2 (51:22):
Go for the new one. You're more excited, go for
the new one.
Speaker 3 (51:25):
Yeah, you know, sometimes you just have to talk it
out and listen to what your body's feeling, because the
gut tells you a lot.
Speaker 1 (51:34):
It does if we just listen to it and quit
trying to overrun it with our ridiculous self preservation.
Speaker 2 (51:39):
Analyzing self preservation. That's right, Yeah, totally.
Speaker 1 (51:44):
I love what you said there. Amy That confidence comes
from doing mm hmm. It doesn't come from reading more,
analyzing more, gathering more data. It comes from doing getting
out there, falling down, scraping your knees they're all some
band aids on and getting going again. That's right, yep,
(52:06):
and it's so awesome to get to talk to you.
I'm I'm glad it worked out. I know we had
some logistics earlier in the year, but this is right.
Where you're supposed to be, and I want to thank
you for what you're doing. Thank you for your voice
and your courage and sharing your story to impact others.
And where can our community follow along and become part
of your network?
Speaker 3 (52:26):
Absolutely so, most active on Instagram handle at Sunshine dot Theory.
Website is Sunshine theory dot com, where you can find
most of the information and also on LinkedIn because I
do work with corporations in some of the mindset and
(52:48):
you know nutritional work too, so you can also find
me on LinkedIn Sunshine Theory and right now too where
we have too mini programs that are that we're launching
for the summer, as well as you.
Speaker 2 (53:08):
Know, deep transformative work. Sure, so all of that's on
my website.
Speaker 1 (53:12):
You can through awesome Amy, Thank you so much. We
appreciate what you're doing for the world and keep it up.
Speaker 3 (53:17):
My friend, same to you. You're giving an even wider voice,
So thank.
Speaker 1 (53:21):
You and remember team. Life is far too short to
live any other way than on purpose. We'll see you
all again next week.
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