The Real Weird Sisters: A Harry Potter Podcast

The Real Weird Sisters: A Harry Potter Podcast

Two real weird sisters break down the Harry Potter series chapter by chapter and delve into special topics related to the Harry Potter universe. Character studies are released every Monday. Special topics episodes are released periodically. Book club episodes for Chamber of Secrets, Prisoner of Azkaban, Goblet of Fire, Order of the Phoenix, Half-Blood Prince, and Deathly Hallows as well as special topics shows recorded from September 2016 through December 2019 can be listened to on the feed titled The Real Weird Sisters: The Archive.

Episodes

One Page at a Time: Book 6, Page 388

August 17, 2025 • 58 mins
This week's One Page at a Time takes Alice and Martha to the 388th page of Half-Blood Prince, which takes place in "Birthday Surprises" but doesn't include any actual birthday surprises. Harry obsesses over Malfoy on the Marauder's Map, while Alice and Martha obsess over the feasibility and scale of the map. 

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One Page at a Time: Book 5, Page 492

August 10, 2025 • 50 mins
Alice and Martha cover the 492nd page of Order of the Phoenix, on which Harry fears he might be the weapon, the group rides the muggle train, and Mary GrandPre's beautiful, festive art is prominently featured.

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One Page at a Time: Book 1, Page 304

August 3, 2025 • 60 mins
Alice and Martha discuss the 304th page of Sorcerer's Stone, as Harry gets a handsome, unlikely, and possibly even shady gift from Hagrid, escapes Madam Pomfrey's control, and makes his way to the end of term feast. 

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One Page at a Time: Book 4, Page 597

July 27, 2025 • 54 mins
Alice and Martha discuss the 597th page of Goblet of Fire, where Dumbledore makes his first significant appearance of the One Page at a Time series as he explains a world which is entirely his own to Harry and Fawkes's presence is heavily implied. 

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Take Five, Take 4.26: Goblet of Fire, 125:01-130:00

July 20, 2025 • 103 mins
Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim are back to continue discussing the graveyard scene, this time featuring a full-bodied Voldemort and some very shadowy figures. Plus, Harry gets a new job as a spokeperson for a popular fast food restaurant! 

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Take Five, Take 4.25: Goblet of Fire, 120:01-125:00

July 13, 2025 • 109 mins
In a surprising twist, Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim are almost as excited to discuss this week's five minutes as Cedric was to realize the cup was a portkey! Wormtail casually slices his hand off, Daniel Radcliffe puts on the performance of a lifetime, and "Ralph Vines" transforms from the Embrymort into a full human body complete with prosthetic fingertips. 

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One Page at a Time: Book 4, Page 358

July 6, 2025 • 63 mins
In one of the most Hermione's bag-worthy pages so far, Harry stops Ron from some important personal growth and Hermione bursts into tears at the *boys*! Find out which segment is a bit of a struggle for this page, and work through all of the WW questions with Alice and Martha on this week's One Page at a Time! 

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One Page at a Time: Book 2, Page 120

June 29, 2025 • 57 mins
One of Martha's predictions from last week comes true as Harry finds himself in detention with Lockhart, hearing voices that no one else can hear. Is lilac ink really so strange, and who/what exactly is Gladys Gudgeon? Alice and Martha don't even need Quora to ask the most pressing questins on this week's episode! 

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One Page at a Time: Book 3, Page 431

June 22, 2025 • 59 mins
Oh, cheer up, listeners! Alice and Martha return to the One Page at a Time series, while the trio returns home for the summer holidays. All on this page: the first sighting of a very tiny owl, an absence of food (especially chocolate), and a few good games of Exploding Snap!

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Take Five, Take 4.24: Goblet of Fire, 115:01-120:00

June 15, 2025 • 80 mins
It might be the most boring five minutes yet, but that doesn't mean it will be most boring Take Five yet! Alice and Martha are joined once again by special guest Shut Up Tim to discuss more of the maze (maize?), the incredibly underwhelming red sparks, and the thrilling discovery Cedric makes upon being transported to the graveyard.

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Take Five, Take 4.23: Goblet of Fire, 110:01-115:00

June 8, 2025 • 91 mins
On this Take Five, Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim talk mistakes of epic proportions, voiceover flubs, and the Hogwarts band. It might seem like we're close to the end of the movie now that the third task is beginning, but there's still lots to cover before we reach the goblet, which only Professor Moody knows the exact location of.

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Fleur Delacour: Character Study, Part 3

June 1, 2025 • 53 mins
Alice and Martha close the book on Fleur, discussing her arc in the seventh book. Fleur may be 'ideous as one of the seven Potters, but don't worry - her beauty is noted in just about every other scene! And it doesn't seem like she minded spending Christmas with Ron and missing out on Celestina's warbling. 

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Take Five, Take 4.22: Goblet of Fire, 105:01-110:00

May 25, 2025 • 93 mins
Hello, Father! Alice, Martha, and special guest Shut Up Tim are back to discuss JUNIOR'S race around the courtroom, Karkaroff's dramatics in the cage and the closet, and Dumbledore's pensive monologuing about the Pensieve. You may be surprised by the appearance of Filch on this podcast! 

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Fleur Delacour: Character Study, Part 2

May 18, 2025 • 51 mins
The characterfleur studies continue, as Alice and Martha discuss Phlegm in the fifth and sixth books. Ol' Fleur Delacour eemproves 'er Eenglish, 'Arry becomes a Fleur apologist, and Bill starts to enjoy his steaks extra rare. We will return with Part 3 to properly eulogize our favorite French character! 

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Fleur Delacour: Character Study, Part 1

May 11, 2025 • 54 mins
Alice and Martha return to character studies to discuss everyone's favorite French champion, Fleur Delacour! Hermione might not give her a fair shake, and Ollivander might scoff at her Veela hair wand, but Fleur has a lot of redeeming characteristics, too! At least she's not a leetle boy!

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One Page at a Time: Book 6, Page 420

May 4, 2025 • 57 mins
Three of Martha's most infamous characters, plus Harry and Ron convene on this week's page for some very goofy times in the Hospital Wing. Plus, find out what Mary GrandPre has been up to during quarantine! (Don't worry; it doesn't involve Twitter). 

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One Page at a Time: Book 6, Page 222

April 27, 2025 • 49 mins
In the most somber OPAAT yet, Alice and Martha review recent bad news in the Wizarding World, which is affecting many of Harry's classmates, including Hannah Abbott, a round-faced Hufflepuff student, the Patil twins, and Lavender Brown. Luckily, Harry's memory is up to the task of remembering all the important details he need to successfully analyze his classmates' actions! 

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One Page at a Time: Book 3, Page 334

April 20, 2025 • 61 mins
One Page at a Time returns to Prisoner of Azkaban, this time for a scene in which Sirius acts enormously strangely. Alice and Martha discuss cat, rat, and dog and scrounge for a bird too, of course! 

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One Page at a Time: Book 4, Page 231

April 13, 2025 • 62 mins
Alice and Martha discuss page 231 of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Alice gets to practice long-form Jim Dale impressions, Barty Crouch Jr. gets to make some weird decisions as Moody, and Harry's at of defiance has the potential to become a pretty sick meme. 

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Take Five, Take 4.21: Goblet of Fire, 100:01-105:00

April 6, 2025 • 82 mins
To discuss this amazing five minutes, Alice and Martha are joined by special guest Shut Up Tim! There's plenty of tongue wiggling, MVB contenders, and cringy Hagrid moments to break down this week! Harry even gets to enter a world which is entirely his own. And don't worry, the microwave minutes may be over, but there's a new segment in town! 

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