March 21, 2025 • 40 mins
Segment 1 with Karin Hurt starts at 0:00.
To say there is increased conflict inside of small business and workplaces is an understatement; it takes now more than ever a courageous leader to deal with this.
Karin Hurt is the CEO and Founder of Let’s Grow Leaders, a global leadership company known for practical tools and leadership development that sticks. She’s the author of five books including, "Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Workplace Conflict and Courageous Cultures". She’s known best for building courageous cultures and high-performing teams.
Segment 2 with Dr. Michael Aziz starts at 24:03.
What about making America Health Again? How will Robert Kennedy as the head of the health secretary change this?
Dr. Michael Aziz is a renowned internist anti-aging, regenerative physician specialist practicing at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City Dr. Aziz regularly provides medical commentary on many health networks, including NPR, Fox and Friends, ABC, WGN Chicago, NBC, and Telemundo. Dr. Aziz is the author of the national bestseller, The Ageless Revolution. Dr. Aziz's columns, articles, and opinions have been published in the Los Angeles Times, CNN, WebMD, the New York Post, the Daily News, the Washington Post, as well as in many magazines internationally, such as Paris Match.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-small-business-radio-show--3306444/support.
To say there is increased conflict inside of small business and workplaces is an understatement; it takes now more than ever a courageous leader to deal with this.
Karin Hurt is the CEO and Founder of Let’s Grow Leaders, a global leadership company known for practical tools and leadership development that sticks. She’s the author of five books including, "Powerful Phrases for Dealing with Workplace Conflict and Courageous Cultures". She’s known best for building courageous cultures and high-performing teams.
Segment 2 with Dr. Michael Aziz starts at 24:03.
What about making America Health Again? How will Robert Kennedy as the head of the health secretary change this?
Dr. Michael Aziz is a renowned internist anti-aging, regenerative physician specialist practicing at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York City Dr. Aziz regularly provides medical commentary on many health networks, including NPR, Fox and Friends, ABC, WGN Chicago, NBC, and Telemundo. Dr. Aziz is the author of the national bestseller, The Ageless Revolution. Dr. Aziz's columns, articles, and opinions have been published in the Los Angeles Times, CNN, WebMD, the New York Post, the Daily News, the Washington Post, as well as in many magazines internationally, such as Paris Match.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/the-small-business-radio-show--3306444/support.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
Get ready for all the craziness of small business. It's
exactly that craziness that makes it exciting and totally unbelievable.
Small Business Radio is now on the air with your host,
Barry Maltz.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Well, thanks for joining this week's radio show. Remember this
is your final word in small business. For those keeping track,
this is now show number eight hundred and twenty six. Well,
to say that there is increased conflict inside a small
business and all the workplaces is really an understatement. It
takes now more energy than ever, more of a courageous
(00:39):
leader than ever to deal with this. My first guest
is Karen Hurt, who is the CEO and founder of
Let's Grow Leaders, a global leadership company known for practical
tools and leadership development that sticks. She's the author of
five books, including Powerful Phrases for dealing with Workplace Conflict
and Courageous Cultures, as well as the creative of the
Synergy Stack team collaboration system. She's known best for building
(01:03):
courageous cultures and high performing teams. Karen, Welcome to the show.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Thanks so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
So is there more conflict in the workplace, Because there's
more conflict in the world now.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
I think it is highly related.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Are we just kids following our parents again?
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Well, you know, we did some extensive research to figure
out what was actually going on, why there's more, and
seventy percent of the people said there's the same more
significantly more conflict in the workplace, and some of it
was related to the world. So, you know, about twenty
seven percent said that it's related to some kind of stress,
mental health issues, mental challenges that you came all out
(01:46):
of the cusp of the pandemic, and so I think
that's part of it.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Five years ago, we can't believe it, Karen, right.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I know, so the question is right. So the research
was done before all this recent craziness that is happening
in the world. But certainly people cited, you know, the tensions,
different political world views and all of that certainly creates
a level of distraction and anxiety for people that they
(02:13):
can't leave at the door.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Well, there's always been conflict in American politics, but now,
in my opinion, we have like the bully in chief, right,
I mean, he's basically built his brand on it's me
or it's you, And if it's you, then I'm going
to bully you. On social media to you say it's me, right,
does that that's got to influence what's going on America?
Because lines he's drawn, very very sharply lines that people
(02:36):
should not work together. It's his way or the highway.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Right, and you know, and some of those behaviors. I
think anytime you see somebody who counted and then with
really intense bullying behaviors, then the people who want to
act and lead that way, say, oh, well he can
do If he can do that, I can too, right.
And it was interesting the other day I wrote some
(03:00):
on our blog about you know, it was what do
you do if diversity, equity and inclusion programs are being
limited aided from your organization? So what can you do?
How can you still lead in an inclusive way? And
it was a very practical, you know, how do you
show up as a human centered leader even if you
don't have the backing and support of official programs. It
(03:22):
was any rate, some troll wrote to me basically a
death threat, right, you know, And I'm like really, and
of course it was from uh uh you know, the
the email address was bite me dot com.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Right, of course? Wild where else were we from?
Speaker 3 (03:40):
You know? So I'm like, all right, Well, if you're
going to attack people like that, at least have the
courage to use your real name.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
To me, there's so much more anger, you know, just
in society. I remember right before the election here in Arizona,
I like, I do I cut someone off coming down
an exit ramp, right, And I've done a lot. I'm
not proud of it, but we're stuck. We're kind of
stacked along the ramp. Guy gets out of his car
and he throws a rock at my car. Oh my goodness, right,
(04:08):
and I hear a rock, and I get out of
my car and I go, what was that? He goes,
that was a rock. That was a rock. You're driving
a quote unquote fag car and I had a T
I had a VW SUV.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
I don't know what you think of this car, but
it's not like whatever. Right, But it just seems to
be a lot more conflict. And that's kind of you know,
that's kind of going into the workplace, not only from politics,
but I think you're right, it's also from the stress
of COVID, of people having to kind of deal with
it on their own, and now they've got to come
back to the office and things like that.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Yeah, So what we really found is what we call
conflict cocktails. Right, So it's not just one thing that's
leading to more conflict, it's these complex I'd.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Like to have a conflict cocktail when I go out.
Sounds good?
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Is what is in that? Okay? Well, there's a couple
of different ones. One we call the wedge driver, and
the wedge driver is when you've got the workforce that
has been shaken up with all kinds of uncertainty and change,
and you know, maybe people are all now working from
home or not or being forced to come back. You
get all that tension going on, and you also have
people that are stressed and overworked and bringing other you know,
(05:20):
anxiety to the workplace, and you've got all that going on.
Another one we call a missed shot, which is a
fast moving manager who's super super busy and employees who
have ideas who don't feel like they're being heard. And
another one is the power trap, where you've got people
who are being held accountable but they do not are
(05:41):
not empowered to do the things that they're being accountable
being held accountable to achieve. And we find this often
in matrix organizations at every level. Of the business. So
those are some examples of conflict cocktails.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Do you think that, you know anger again, in a
current political environment, there seems to be a lot of anger, right,
a lot of bullying. I think the other day Trump
said something like on his social media things saying, you know,
the Palestinians or Hamas must give back the hotshes or
you're dead right. I mean, it's very much in your face.
(06:15):
Do you think that people are adopting that because it
used to be that anger was not really an acceptable behavior, right.
It used to be that, you know, we kind of
all of how to work it out. That was kind
of the mantra in small business. But maybe the mantra
now is, hey, it's my way the highway, it's the
alpha male all over again.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Well, I do think you're seeing pockets of that, but
the good news is it's not everywhere. And there are
a lot of people who are calling us right to say,
help my team get along better. And one of the
things that we're really finding is the solution is creating
clear expectations. So you know, in our book Powerful Phrases,
we're dealing with workplace conflict, we talk about four dimensions
(06:57):
of productive.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Really at the end of the year, because you know,
the human beings.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Clarity, do we have a shared understanding of success? Curiosity,
are we genuinely interested in one another's perspectives and what's possible?
And then commitment, do we have a shared agreement. We've
got powerful phrases for all of those, and the call
we get most frequently really comes down to clarity. What
are expectations? And we'll hear from C level leaders who
(07:22):
will say, gosh, you know, Karen, they should know, like
I shouldn't have to train my senior team right about
this because they have a mass, because they have a
master's degree, because their mama should have raised them better, right,
what it was?
Speaker 2 (07:37):
Back to your mother? Always back to your mother. I
don't know why mother's get a bad rep.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
But the bottom line is my first question, of course,
is exactly what you just said? Have you told them?
And a lot of times what will happen is well,
I told them, but I told them things like you
should present the data better, or you should think more strategically,
or you know, you should be a better team player.
(08:02):
Well what does that actually mean?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
You know?
Speaker 3 (08:05):
And so really we help We've been helping teams to
you know behind the scenes, we call it a Kooth code, Like,
you know, how do you be kooth? Like what do
you do? How do you show up? And so things
like Okay, if you got an email, do you at
least acknowledge it within twenty four hours? How do you
show up in the meeting? Share cameras be on? Or
share your cameras be off? All of these these very
(08:27):
specific expectations. And we just yet just finished a project
with one of a very fast growing healthcare organization that
does do they do medical testing, but one of the
things they're moving so fast and they're growing so fast,
they picked three areas that they really wanted to have
very clear expectations for their leadership team, and it was amazing.
(08:49):
We we just yesterday had a call where we really
rolled these out and it was so fascinating how people
are like, oh, thank you, thank you for making this
perfectly clear. Now I know exactly what to do. So
I think, you know, when people are struggling, that's the
first thing I would say is do you have clear expectations?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
And I would say stay off social medium because that's
where people are really angry.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Anonymously well, and it's because it's easy to show up
there that way.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
You know, you say couth code, Is that still a word?
I mean, maybe that's a word back from from my
my ear. I love the three c's, you know, I
mean the four c's connection, clarity, curiosity, commitment. The one
that is most interesting to me is curiosity, because I
don't think people are curious about the folks in their organization.
And if you're curious, it shows that you another see care.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Yes, yes, And here's the thing. It is impossible to
be curious and furious at the same time, right, Like
you know, if you move your brain into I am
really going to stop and be really curious about what
is happening here, then you calm down. It uses a
different part of your brain. And we have a couple
of so for each one of these mentions, we have
(10:01):
what we call goat grace of all time, powerful phrases
for them. And so you know, when we talk about curiosity,
one of my favorites is simply I am curious what
this looks like from your perspective. And then the thing
is you've got to really actually.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Listen, not just go on your phone. Yeah yeah, So
let's let's hear powerful phrases for each of those, because
that's the title of book. Powerphrase for Dealing workplace conflict.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
Yeah, so connection one of my favorites there is I
really care about and then you insert the thing that
you genuinely care about. So I really care about you,
I really care about this team, I really care about
the work we're doing together. I really care about the
outcome of this project. I really care about our customer. Right,
and I'm confident we can find a solution we can
both work with here. And then another connection one is
(10:46):
simply tell me more. And this one is if somebody
comes into your cube and they are fired up, right,
they're spitt and teeth, they're angry, and the first thing
you do is say, oh wow, it sounds like you're said,
can you tell me more? They will calm down because
the reason they're getting loud is they want to be heard,
and when you say tell me more, you're showing that
you hear them. Clarity. This is actually, of all three
(11:09):
hundred powerful phrases in the book, this is my favorite
of all of them. And this is what would a
successful outcome do for you? So all the time we're
asking what would success look like? But when you say
what would a successful oulcome do for you, You're going
to level deeper. So imagine you and I are working
on a project together and our boss gives it to
us a Monday and we have to read out on
(11:31):
it to the executive team following Monday. We know exactly
what the project is about. But if we take five
minutes and I say, hey, what would a successful outcome
do for you? Barry? And you go, you know what
I got to tell you. I have been working like
seventy hour weeks for last three weeks, and what successful
outcome would do for me is we walk out of
here at five o'clock with a bow on this thing,
so I don't think about it until Monday morning.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
I love that rather than what it looks like what
it would do for you, So it makes much more
personal and make it much more achievement oriented. Personal achievement oriented.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Yeah, and I might say, you know what a successful
income would do for me is my boss does not
see my genius around this stuff. So when the really
tough questions come on Monday, can I answer a couple
of them so he gets that I know what I'm doing,
all right. So that's a clarity, curiosity, what do you
suggest we do next?
Speaker 2 (12:18):
You know?
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Or what can I do to most supports you right now,
which is really a by one get one free, because
that's a connection one as well as curiosity.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
But a lot of managers or owners in small businesses
has a hard time dealing with conflict, so they avoid it.
What's your advice from them? So?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Yeah, So that's so we have three questions that we
encourage you to ask yourself if you want to avoid
the conflict, if there's a conversation you know you should
have but you don't want to have. The first is,
you know, why does what you have to say matter?
Why does it matter for your relationship? Why does it
matter for the outcome? Why does it matter for your
(12:58):
small business? Why does it matter for your customers? Why
does what you have to say matter? What's at stake?
If you stay silent for all those things? And then finally,
imagine that you've had this conversation and you're on the
other side of it. You might not have gotten everything
you wanted, but you have been heard. What is the
emotion that you're feeling? And when I asked that question
(13:20):
in keynotes all the time, so you know, a couple
of thousand people in the audience, and I'm just shout out,
what is the emotion that you will heard? Number one
answer all the time is relief?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Absolutely. I was just gonna say that, Karen, How's gonna
shut out? Relief?
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Great? And that's the thing, that's that's why we read
the book because we want people to feel less stressed
and more relief.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Yeah. I mean, one of my favorite phrases of all
time is Robert Louis Stevenson who says the only way
out is through. And no matter why we don't want
to have these conversations that have to deal with conflict,
we got to do it. What happens, You know, a
lot of managers are put in the place where it's
not a conflict with them. It's not a conflict with
the person in the organsa. It's a personal conflict between
two people. Perhaps, let's say they're two managers. How do
(14:05):
you navigate that? Because you know that your team is
weaker because these two people don't get along.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Yeah, So the first thing that I would do is
give them some skills, right, So first I'd hand them
the book.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
But of course the book being powerful phrase for dealing
with workplace conflict and courageous cultures. Just sposed to be
very clear about what the book is. This isn't a Bible.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
This is the other book right exactly. And that's a
good book. The Bible's good, but.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Also best selling of all time, so you know.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
But really our book is designed so you can go
to the table of context and if you contents and
if you are in what we call an ACE and
acute conflict emergency, it's like somebody just stole credit for
my idea. My boss is a micro manager. Whoever those
two people are, there is likely a chapter for that.
So that's the first thing is give them some phrases,
help them empower them. But I will also tell you
(14:57):
that it's really encouraging to have the conversation. One of
the things that I do for one of our clients
is I go once a quarter and I have like
office hours where I go sit in the conference room
and people can come in and just talk to me
about anything that's going on in the business. I had
this one guy come in and he's like spitting teeth. Man,
he was so angry and he's like, ah, she doesn't care,
(15:19):
and had this and I said, you do realize you
both want exactly the same thing, right, clarity, that's not true,
I said, Oh yeah, she was just in here. You
guys want both both want exactly the same thing. This
is the outcome you're both trying to achieve. Go talk
to her, have the conversation. He came back, He's like,
you know what I have wasted? Did three months of
(15:41):
my life being stressed out, losing sleep over this? You
know it's true, we both want exactly the same thing.
I'm like, right, so how do you get there? How
do you show up curious about how you can support
one another? And just the fact that they had the conversation.
So that's the advice I would give to the manager.
Do that encourage them to have the conversation.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
So you don't think the manager should be the efficient,
right should be the official. You suggest them to talk
to each other direct.
Speaker 3 (16:08):
That's where I would certainly start.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Because one things I keep thinking is, you know this
is back in my days when I used to run
businesses back in the nineties, was I don't care if
you guys get along, You've got to be able to
work it out, right, And you think they have a
better chance of working out if they talk with each other,
not between with you or through you.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Here's one yes, and here's one caveat to that. You've
got to make sure that you haven't set up organizational
structures and systems that is causing the conflict. So when
we were doing writing the book, we talked to Ralph Kilman,
who is the founder of the Thomas Killman one of
the co founders of Thomas Killman. In Conflict Assessment, I
(16:48):
asked him if I could call him the grandfather of
workplace conflict research, and he said yes. But he's really
really famous for his deep, deep work in colon and
the you know he talks about most conflict is caused
by systems. And I think about I was at Verizon
(17:08):
for twenty years before I founded Letscore Leaders, which is
our company, and you know, I had this I think
about this time, I had this massive, massive conflict with
this guy and when I think about it, he was
a really nice human being, but we could not get along.
But here's why. I led a twenty two hundred person
sales team that was the retail sales stores, so all
(17:30):
the retail stores that are Verison in a certain region.
He had all the indirect Channel stores that were in
the exact same region, right, So our stores were competing
against one another, and you know, it's hard to collaborate
when your whole team's quotas are at stake for what
the other person does or doesn't do.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Right, Right, So how did you resolve that.
Speaker 4 (17:57):
I did it?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
I was terrible. I didn't use anything.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
That's why I've eventually wrote the book.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Yeah, you know, but I mean that's you know, we
say in one of our other books, winning, Well, you
know the conflict. You know, you know, your competition is
not the person in the cube next door, right, it's mediocrity.
But in that case, I really did view him as
the competition, as opposed to you know, Sprint being the
real competition. But I was losing more sales to him
(18:26):
than I was a Sprint.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
So if you look into your crystal ball for the future,
are you hopeful that conflict will be able to work
through and the worst being avoided?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I am very, very optimistic that when people take the
time to have the conversation, when they look at the
conflicts and they diagnose what is needed most is a connection, clarity, curiosity,
or commitment, and make an effort either using our powerful
phrases or any other way to have the conversation. I
see it happen all this time. I am seeing it work.
(19:00):
So it's the But I think the first piece is
do you want to resolve the conflict right? Because here's
the thing. Conflict in itself isn't necessarily bad. So David
Die is my husband and co author. We've written several
books together. We worked, we'd run a global leadership development firm.
We have conflict every single day, and it's because I
(19:21):
have my p and you're right exactly.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
Exactly. He would just see it my way, we'd be okay, right.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
But inherently in our relationship, in our business relationship, we
are set up to have conflict. I am moving fast,
I'm the move in the strategy. How fast do we go?
And he's like, you know, let's get this right, let's
low this down, let's operationalize this right. That is, there's
going to be inherent conflict, but it's how we have
that conflict. On the other side of that conflict, things
are better. Our writing is better, our our relationships with
(19:53):
our customers are better, our outcomes are better because we're
both bringing different perspectives. But if we just avoided that
conflict or just rolled over and said, yeah, do whatever
you want, we wouldn't have those good outcomes.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
I also think that if people get together as people,
and I mean just really one on one with really
nothing to prove, and they see the humanity of the
other person rather being anonymous online or sending the emails
like you talked about, when people see other folks exactly
as people they see themselves. So I think the conflicts
resolve themselves. I really do if people just talk.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
I love that. You know, Berne Brown says, you know,
it's hard to hate people up close.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Absolutely, she says it much better than me. But yeah,
that's what I meant. That's what I've meant, so, Karen.
The title of the book is called Powerful Phrases from
dealing with Workplace Conflict and Courageous Cultures. I got to
run out and get it, especially for one of my clients.
Where can people catch up with you and learn more
about the work you're doing?
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Thank you so much. Yeah. So, our website is Let's
Grow leaders dot com and if you go to the
tab for books, you'll see all of our books listed there.
So that's one easy way. Of course, it is a
powerful phrases for dealing with workplace conflict is available anywhere
books are sold. If you are since your podcast listener,
you're probably rather listen to the book, and so it
(21:11):
is available on audible read by both of us and
people tell us, Hey, you know, I feel like you're
driving around in my car giving me advice.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
So and you read it better than your husband. No,
that's just another conflict. So that's all good. Karen, thanks
so much for joining us. There's a small business radio show.
We'll be right back. My work with thousands of small
business owners over the last twenty years inspired me to
write my next book and how to make Changes. Well,
(21:39):
that's not exactly true. More accurately, my frustration and the
resulting challenges working with small business owners forced me to
write this new book. Let me explain. I'm often asked
by companies and small business owners that I don't know
to help them. Typically, they're feeling stuck by a problem
and their companies can't move forward. After analyzes situation, we
(22:00):
mutually decide on a go forward strategy. I help them
assemble a detailed plan to make any changes and the
critical sess factors and actions that need to be completed,
they agree that taking these actions will help them solve
their issue for their company and make them more money,
and then almost nothing happens. Unfortunately, most small business owners
(22:23):
implement a few easy steps but never take the critical
or difficult ones that could make a difference. This has
long frustrated me, since we worked really hard on putting
together this plan, and at the beginning we were both
excited about the result. I wrote my new book, change Masters,
How to Actually Make the changes you already know need
(22:45):
to make to figure out why small business owners do
not make the changes or take the actions that they
know will help them reach their goals. Where is the
gap between sincere intent to make these changes and the
actions to actually do it. What holds most people back
and keeps them stuck on the same path over and
over again. Why are they still so comfortable and not
(23:07):
making these changes and staying on a path that clearly
doesn't work for them? One thing is it's not adding
to their happiness, and it's not adding to their feelings success.
What steps do they need to take to slowly break
free and start to make those changes today that will
help them in the long run. In my new book,
I reveal much of the psychological research around why change
(23:30):
is just so hard for so many people, and real
life strategies that every small business owner can employ right
now to make the changes they need to make in
their companies to grow. So get my new book, Change Masters.
Remember I'm not trying to convince you to make a change,
but rather help you make the changes you already know
you need to take.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Stick around to get your small business unstuck. More of
Small Business Radio with Barry Moles.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
We've all heard really over the last eight years, make
America great again? Really to add nauseum, But what about
making America healthy again? And how will Robert Kennedy being
confirmed as the head of the Health Secretary of the
US change all this, and how as small business owners
can we live healthier, longer and more productive lives. My
(24:25):
next guest is doctor Michael Aziz, who's a renowned interners
anti aging her Jeneit physicians specialist Praxie at Lenox Hill
Hospital in New York City. Doctor Z's regularly provides medical
commentary on many health networks. He is also the author
of a book called The Ageless Revolution. Doctor Z's Welcome
to the show.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Thank you so much for having you darry.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
So as I age, I keep thinking that so much
of aging is just genetics. It's kind of like the
hand youard del Is that true or can you do
a lot about it?
Speaker 4 (25:00):
No? Actually that's amiss. And eighty percent of how we
age depends upon the things we do in life, from
diet to sleep to exercise. Only genetics only play twenty
percent role in how we get how we age.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
So if you want to live longer, and again I
don't think just living longer and not being able to
have your mental facilities or be able to move is
really any great prize. But if you want to live
a longer, healthier life, what do you tell your patients
of first one or two things that they really have
to do as early as possible.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
The problem is, I really have to change the mindset
not only of my patients, but also of the people
who are going to read my book. Because I'm treating
aging as a disease. Many of my patients are stuck
in the old model of going to the doctor once
a year doing routine blood test checking their cholesterol or CVC.
But that's not going to affect aging in many ways.
(25:57):
For us to age better, we need a very very
proactive approach about knowing all the advances in medicine that
happened the last twenty years that can make us not
only have a better health span, but a longer life span.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
So, for example, doctor, these what practices on a daily
basis should we be doing?
Speaker 4 (26:19):
I think when it comes to longevity, the most important
of course is diet, and diets play a huge role
in longevity. We see that in the Blue zones and
the countries in the world where they live to eighty
eight and ninety, like Monaco they lift the ninety. Hong
Kong they lift to eighty eight, and they eat mostly
a plant based diet. We are really following the wrong
(26:40):
diets here in this country. Between low fat they're very
high in sugar, low carb diets and keito which are
now in trend are very high and animal protein and
processed meat and artificial sweeteners. We know that nitrites and
bacont sausage damage to DNA. They eat the cancer and
unfortunately that's the trend going right now. In many of
the magia. You see how many people are successful on
(27:02):
low carbon and all those popular diets. But really we
are on the wrong tracks when it comes to longevity.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
So how did we get here really as Americans? Is
it because the advertising is so good for these companies
to get us to eat, or because for a lot
of America where things are a lot more plentiful, food's
a lot more plentiful than other parts of the world.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
I think the problem is we're eating too much processed food,
and I think we've been brainwashed by the lobbyist that
the processed food is better for us. So many people
don't eat eggs. They think cereals are better. We don't
eat better. We think vegetable oils are good for us.
So all that stuff, you know, all the seed oil,
cotton seed corn causes inflammation. And those lobbyists also influence
(27:47):
the guidelines from the government. Like the original usd with
pyramids lost. Our diets were really invented by politicians back
in the seventies. They had no scientific basis. Sugar is
the worst thing you could do to age, and as
a result, we were lost as a society and we
just followed whatever people tell us to be. Anybody who's
(28:08):
no education writes a book and then before you know
it's your following this trend. And that's why we really
have to get back to basics. It's eating natural food,
eating natural fats, butter, olive oil, avocados, and eating more
vegetables and less animal products and no chemicals.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Well, Americans have always been into trends in fads. How
do you think this these guidelines might change under you know,
perhaps new you know Health Secretary Robert Kennedy Jr.
Speaker 4 (28:37):
I am not sure about his position. I know his
position on TRT, which is good because he takes what's
I think he has a what's TRT?
Speaker 2 (28:46):
What's TRT? Don't? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
Yeah, yeah, And he looks good on TV when he
takes his shirt off. He looks about the health of Yeah,
so he's concerned about the health in the country. He
has some views that, you know, the fast food should
change to animal fats for cooking instead of the seed oils.
So yeah, I think there are very very valid points.
(29:08):
And I hope he surrounds himself with good people can
help him guide him, because I don't think he's a physician.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
So so what why do why do like like what
I think the average age that I think men live
to in the US is like early seventies and women
live to like mid seventies. Why do women live longer
than men.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
It has to do with the fact that they stostone
and sex hormones. So estrogen progesterone in women lead to
a longer longevity. Uh, and dystostroone. If you do too much,
that could be also harmful. So that's why men die
more than women.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
What about stress? You know that that is a really
big factor for a lot of small business owners. How
does stress affect the aging process? Oh?
Speaker 4 (29:54):
Stress, I talked about it a lot in the book
The Asiless Revolution, because stress plays a huge role in longevity.
One is it affects a hormone call influence and before
you know it, if you have too much stress, you
can end up with diabetes. You can have high streng level,
you end up gaining weight. Many people who are just
they can eat the same number of galleries and then
(30:15):
one is stressed, one is not. The person who stress
can gain weight at leads too. You know, insomnia like
a sleep, and like a sleep, you are making a
hormone called melatonin. Melatonin is just not a sleep hormone.
It is the most important antioxidant in the body that
protects the mitochondria or the battery of ourselves. So stress
(30:36):
affects longevity. And then finally, also too much stress shortens
the telomeres. Those are the end cap of the chromosomes.
And when people have shorter telomeres, they have shorter life.
So if you're stressed, that's not good. That's going to
mean probably a shorter life.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
So what kinds of people usually come to see you.
Is it people that already have a problem and they're
trying to overcome an acute problem, or folks in general,
and just say listen, you know, I'm sixty five years old.
I want the next twenty years to be my best years.
Speaker 4 (31:10):
I'm a traditional doctor, but are trained to be a
functional doctor. Side treat aging as a disease, and as
I see in your patient, I see what issues they have,
I deal with that, but I also educate them about
what they need to do to fight aging on the
sailor level, because that's a very brand new approach that
no one is doing. You know, you go to the doctor,
they we do with your blood pressure or your high
(31:32):
sugar or high cholesterol, but they don't deal with the
issues all the vitamin deficiencies. We have to fix all
the hormonal changes that have to be fixed fighting aging
the whole months of aging that I talk about in
the book, because really the reasons we age is the
self tut to malfunction. So basically I'm dealing with why
(31:52):
the cell deteriorate, why do they malfunction, why they stop
working in the eventry dye. So you want to extend
the life cycle of the cells, and we do that
by targeting the whole months of aging.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
So doctors, I've written a lot about how hard it
is for people to change their habits right, and they
really only do it, in my opinion, when they're in
a lot of pain. How have you seen patients effectuate
change in their lives, whether it's diet or stress or
just to live differently.
Speaker 4 (32:23):
I think people have to be motivated. It has to
be something in you that tells you I need to
be healthy. For me, it comes from the fact that
all of a sudden, I found myself older, I did
not like how I look, and I had to change.
I had to lose weight, I had to control my
sugar intake, I had to drop my cholesterol, I had
(32:43):
to drop my high sugar that I was pre diabetic.
And it was something in me that led me to
develop this plan and write to share my information and
my story in this book to asious revolution. But it
really is up to the person. I've also just talked
to a recent billionaire in New York and he's very
much overweight. I will not mention his name, and he
(33:05):
was not interested. So you know, you cannot. It has
to be after the person to be interested and changing
their life. You know.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
It's interesting to me because about thirty years ago, I
got diabetes when I was thirty five, and the way
I found out was that I had blurry vision and
that really kind of scared the crap out of me.
And so I really believe that when you have a
scary incident, it really does propel you to more change
rather than just oh, you know, I can deal with
what's going on.
Speaker 4 (33:35):
Yes. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
You talk about in the book how your chronological age
doesn't matter, right, but it's really the biological age that
we should focus on. Tell us the difference between those two.
Speaker 4 (33:49):
So chronological age is the date that we were born
or our birthday, and that you can lie about. I'm
like thirty five.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yes, yes, how old I am? Right?
Speaker 4 (34:05):
I don't know. Everything is on Google now everything you
can google it. Biological age is the new concept in medicine.
It tells the age of ourselves, and that you cannot
lie about because there are tests to tell you how
old are yourself, and that's based on your lifestyle, the
things you do. Somebody could be twenty, but they're doing
(34:26):
all the wrong things. They're doing drugs, they're smoking, and
their biological age it could be forty or someone who
is fifty or sixty and they're doing all the right
things and their biological age is at a much younger age.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Can you turn back the biological clock?
Speaker 4 (34:42):
Sure? Yes, with all that's That's what the Age's Revolution
is all about. It's turning back the clock. It's slowing
the aging process and turning back the clock with a
variety of weapons. So I talk about lifestyle in the
first part of the book, but then I go and
talk about diet. I copy the diets of all those
blue zones and where people live to be ninety to
(35:05):
see what they do, and then I move on to
supplements and medications and peptides, hormone replacement, all the weapons
that fight the biological age.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
All right, So, of course the biggest question is how
does alcohol affect your biological age.
Speaker 4 (35:24):
So alcohol is a little bit of a hormetic stress.
It affects the cells in certain ways in small amounts
and moderation. It's okay. We see many countries many people
live to be one hundred and beyond not drinking a
little bit. But I think alcohol in access is very bad.
So alcohol, if you exceed the six seven drinks a week,
(35:46):
increases mortality by causing liver damage, liver zoses, high blood pressure,
increases the risk for sosha gel cancer, and so on.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Now you know, cannabis is league recreational legal in a
lot of states. Has there been any research or have
you had any done any research on how cannabis affects
the aging process?
Speaker 4 (36:08):
There are some, but it damages brain cells. It's not good.
And we have an epidemic of Alzheimer's disease in this
country of what kind of disease?
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Again, what kind of disease Alzheimer's Alzheimer's ease?
Speaker 4 (36:21):
Yeah, yeah, so you know, and then when you use
cannabis and all that stuff, then you have to smoke,
and that's not good.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
All the.
Speaker 4 (36:30):
It's just not good. So it does damage to DNA
as well.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Why do you think we're seeing so much more Alzheimer's.
It just because it's getting diagnosed more or there's really
something going on.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
Here, there's more diagnosis. But definitely the fact is that
the task so all the big diseases that the age
raated diseases, diabetes, heart attack, stroke, and dementia is all
related to sugar high sugar intake.
Speaker 2 (36:56):
And so if you reduce your intake, you'll have less
of a chance of getting those disease long term.
Speaker 4 (37:03):
Correct, you know you have you know one third of
the country are pre diabetic. Yeah, seventy percent of Americans
are overweight, and that is calling and fueling the epidemic
of age related diseases that we see even in young people,
from high cholesterol, high levels of heart attacks, now Indians
(37:27):
just everything.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
So what's your outlook on I guess a healthy America.
Do you see things changing and evolving or it's kind
of status quo.
Speaker 4 (37:39):
I think it's going to take a lot of education.
It's going to take a whole generation of doctors like
myself to deal with aging as a disease, know the
whole marks of aging. I'm probably the first doctor and
who authors the book to target aging as a disease
and throwing the kitchens think at all the whole marks
of aging. Many doctors do not know that will also
(38:00):
take individual every person will be responsible to be educated
by what they put in their bodies, and will also
take the government to take care of us as regard
you know, banning certain artificial stuff, the dye that they
put in our food, regented agriculture. You know, it's not
just enough to eat organic food and avoiding the pesticides,
(38:21):
but also to get the whole spectrum of the nutrition
that the people in the boozon't eat.
Speaker 2 (38:27):
Yeah, so I think one of the I don't know.
Do you think that one of the problems with people
eating healthier is the cost because it's very cheap to
go and convenience to go to fast food, which is
really isn't good for you, but it's a lot harder
to eat healthy. Is that a barrier for a lot
of people?
Speaker 4 (38:44):
I think so. I think it's a big barrier. But
I talk in my book that the biggest barrier we
have is really not the whole box of aging. It's
a barrier that we put in front of ourselves. Will say,
you know, I'm too tired to work out it's too
cold today. I don't have them need to work out.
People have to Health should be their number one priority.
They can cut on their expenses whatever they do. I
(39:07):
see people paying eight hundred dollars to go see tailor
Switt right exactly. They don't want to say for a supplement.
So you got you gotta set. People have to set
their priority straight. Health is the most important thing that
you have to deal with.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
That's funny. Well, the title of the book is called
The Ageless Revolution. Where can people catch up with you online?
Doctor Disease?
Speaker 4 (39:27):
They can go through my website Wwwageless Revolution dot com
or my office website Michael AZIZMD dot com.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
Doctor Z's thanks for being here, and I want to
thank everyone for being part of the radio show. This week.
I got to thank our incredible staff, our booking producer
Sarah Schaffern, our video and sound editor Ethan Moltz. If
you're serious about being more successful in twenty twenty five,
give me a call. I've set up a private line
seven seven three eight three seven eight two five zero
or email me at Barry at Molts dot com. Remember
(39:59):
love everyone, trust a few and paliown canoe have a
profitable and passionate week.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
You can find Barrymoltz on the web at Barrymolts dot com,
or more episodes of Small Business Radio at small Business
radioshow dot com.
Get ready for all the craziness of small business. It's
exactly that craziness that makes it exciting and totally unbelievable.
Small Business Radio is now on the air with your host,
Barry Maltz.
Speaker 2 (00:17):
Well, thanks for joining this week's radio show. Remember this
is your final word in small business. For those keeping track,
this is now show number eight hundred and twenty six. Well,
to say that there is increased conflict inside a small
business and all the workplaces is really an understatement. It
takes now more energy than ever, more of a courageous
(00:39):
leader than ever to deal with this. My first guest
is Karen Hurt, who is the CEO and founder of
Let's Grow Leaders, a global leadership company known for practical
tools and leadership development that sticks. She's the author of
five books, including Powerful Phrases for dealing with Workplace Conflict
and Courageous Cultures, as well as the creative of the
Synergy Stack team collaboration system. She's known best for building
(01:03):
courageous cultures and high performing teams. Karen, Welcome to the show.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
Thanks so much for having me.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
So is there more conflict in the workplace, Because there's
more conflict in the world now.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
I think it is highly related.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Are we just kids following our parents again?
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Well, you know, we did some extensive research to figure
out what was actually going on, why there's more, and
seventy percent of the people said there's the same more
significantly more conflict in the workplace, and some of it
was related to the world. So, you know, about twenty
seven percent said that it's related to some kind of stress,
mental health issues, mental challenges that you came all out
(01:46):
of the cusp of the pandemic, and so I think
that's part of it.
Speaker 2 (01:50):
Five years ago, we can't believe it, Karen, right.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
I know, so the question is right. So the research
was done before all this recent craziness that is happening
in the world. But certainly people cited, you know, the tensions,
different political world views and all of that certainly creates
a level of distraction and anxiety for people that they
(02:13):
can't leave at the door.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Well, there's always been conflict in American politics, but now,
in my opinion, we have like the bully in chief, right,
I mean, he's basically built his brand on it's me
or it's you, And if it's you, then I'm going
to bully you. On social media to you say it's me, right,
does that that's got to influence what's going on America?
Because lines he's drawn, very very sharply lines that people
(02:36):
should not work together. It's his way or the highway.
Speaker 3 (02:39):
Right, and you know, and some of those behaviors. I
think anytime you see somebody who counted and then with
really intense bullying behaviors, then the people who want to
act and lead that way, say, oh, well he can
do If he can do that, I can too, right.
And it was interesting the other day I wrote some
(03:00):
on our blog about you know, it was what do
you do if diversity, equity and inclusion programs are being
limited aided from your organization? So what can you do?
How can you still lead in an inclusive way? And
it was a very practical, you know, how do you
show up as a human centered leader even if you
don't have the backing and support of official programs. It
(03:22):
was any rate, some troll wrote to me basically a
death threat, right, you know, And I'm like really, and
of course it was from uh uh you know, the
the email address was bite me dot com.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Right, of course? Wild where else were we from?
Speaker 3 (03:40):
You know? So I'm like, all right, Well, if you're
going to attack people like that, at least have the
courage to use your real name.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
To me, there's so much more anger, you know, just
in society. I remember right before the election here in Arizona,
I like, I do I cut someone off coming down
an exit ramp, right, And I've done a lot. I'm
not proud of it, but we're stuck. We're kind of
stacked along the ramp. Guy gets out of his car
and he throws a rock at my car. Oh my goodness, right,
(04:08):
and I hear a rock, and I get out of
my car and I go, what was that? He goes,
that was a rock. That was a rock. You're driving
a quote unquote fag car and I had a T
I had a VW SUV.
Speaker 3 (04:21):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:21):
I don't know what you think of this car, but
it's not like whatever. Right, But it just seems to
be a lot more conflict. And that's kind of you know,
that's kind of going into the workplace, not only from politics,
but I think you're right, it's also from the stress
of COVID, of people having to kind of deal with
it on their own, and now they've got to come
back to the office and things like that.
Speaker 3 (04:43):
Yeah, So what we really found is what we call
conflict cocktails. Right, So it's not just one thing that's
leading to more conflict, it's these complex I'd.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Like to have a conflict cocktail when I go out.
Sounds good?
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Is what is in that? Okay? Well, there's a couple
of different ones. One we call the wedge driver, and
the wedge driver is when you've got the workforce that
has been shaken up with all kinds of uncertainty and change,
and you know, maybe people are all now working from
home or not or being forced to come back. You
get all that tension going on, and you also have
people that are stressed and overworked and bringing other you know,
(05:20):
anxiety to the workplace, and you've got all that going on.
Another one we call a missed shot, which is a
fast moving manager who's super super busy and employees who
have ideas who don't feel like they're being heard. And
another one is the power trap, where you've got people
who are being held accountable but they do not are
(05:41):
not empowered to do the things that they're being accountable
being held accountable to achieve. And we find this often
in matrix organizations at every level. Of the business. So
those are some examples of conflict cocktails.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Do you think that, you know anger again, in a
current political environment, there seems to be a lot of anger, right,
a lot of bullying. I think the other day Trump
said something like on his social media things saying, you know,
the Palestinians or Hamas must give back the hotshes or
you're dead right. I mean, it's very much in your face.
(06:15):
Do you think that people are adopting that because it
used to be that anger was not really an acceptable behavior, right.
It used to be that, you know, we kind of
all of how to work it out. That was kind
of the mantra in small business. But maybe the mantra
now is, hey, it's my way the highway, it's the
alpha male all over again.
Speaker 3 (06:35):
Well, I do think you're seeing pockets of that, but
the good news is it's not everywhere. And there are
a lot of people who are calling us right to say,
help my team get along better. And one of the
things that we're really finding is the solution is creating
clear expectations. So you know, in our book Powerful Phrases,
we're dealing with workplace conflict, we talk about four dimensions
(06:57):
of productive.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Really at the end of the year, because you know,
the human beings.
Speaker 3 (07:00):
Clarity, do we have a shared understanding of success? Curiosity,
are we genuinely interested in one another's perspectives and what's possible?
And then commitment, do we have a shared agreement. We've
got powerful phrases for all of those, and the call
we get most frequently really comes down to clarity. What
are expectations? And we'll hear from C level leaders who
(07:22):
will say, gosh, you know, Karen, they should know, like
I shouldn't have to train my senior team right about
this because they have a mass, because they have a
master's degree, because their mama should have raised them better, right,
what it was?
Speaker 2 (07:37):
Back to your mother? Always back to your mother. I
don't know why mother's get a bad rep.
Speaker 3 (07:42):
But the bottom line is my first question, of course,
is exactly what you just said? Have you told them?
And a lot of times what will happen is well,
I told them, but I told them things like you
should present the data better, or you should think more strategically,
or you know, you should be a better team player.
(08:02):
Well what does that actually mean?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
You know?
Speaker 3 (08:05):
And so really we help We've been helping teams to
you know behind the scenes, we call it a Kooth code, Like,
you know, how do you be kooth? Like what do
you do? How do you show up? And so things
like Okay, if you got an email, do you at
least acknowledge it within twenty four hours? How do you
show up in the meeting? Share cameras be on? Or
share your cameras be off? All of these these very
(08:27):
specific expectations. And we just yet just finished a project
with one of a very fast growing healthcare organization that
does do they do medical testing, but one of the
things they're moving so fast and they're growing so fast,
they picked three areas that they really wanted to have
very clear expectations for their leadership team, and it was amazing.
(08:49):
We we just yesterday had a call where we really
rolled these out and it was so fascinating how people
are like, oh, thank you, thank you for making this
perfectly clear. Now I know exactly what to do. So
I think, you know, when people are struggling, that's the
first thing I would say is do you have clear expectations?
Speaker 2 (09:08):
And I would say stay off social medium because that's
where people are really angry.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
Anonymously well, and it's because it's easy to show up
there that way.
Speaker 2 (09:16):
You know, you say couth code, Is that still a word?
I mean, maybe that's a word back from from my
my ear. I love the three c's, you know, I
mean the four c's connection, clarity, curiosity, commitment. The one
that is most interesting to me is curiosity, because I
don't think people are curious about the folks in their organization.
And if you're curious, it shows that you another see care.
Speaker 3 (09:39):
Yes, yes, And here's the thing. It is impossible to
be curious and furious at the same time, right, Like
you know, if you move your brain into I am
really going to stop and be really curious about what
is happening here, then you calm down. It uses a
different part of your brain. And we have a couple
of so for each one of these mentions, we have
(10:01):
what we call goat grace of all time, powerful phrases
for them. And so you know, when we talk about curiosity,
one of my favorites is simply I am curious what
this looks like from your perspective. And then the thing
is you've got to really actually.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Listen, not just go on your phone. Yeah yeah, So
let's let's hear powerful phrases for each of those, because
that's the title of book. Powerphrase for Dealing workplace conflict.
Speaker 3 (10:23):
Yeah, so connection one of my favorites there is I
really care about and then you insert the thing that
you genuinely care about. So I really care about you,
I really care about this team, I really care about
the work we're doing together. I really care about the
outcome of this project. I really care about our customer. Right,
and I'm confident we can find a solution we can
both work with here. And then another connection one is
(10:46):
simply tell me more. And this one is if somebody
comes into your cube and they are fired up, right,
they're spitt and teeth, they're angry, and the first thing
you do is say, oh wow, it sounds like you're said,
can you tell me more? They will calm down because
the reason they're getting loud is they want to be heard,
and when you say tell me more, you're showing that
you hear them. Clarity. This is actually, of all three
(11:09):
hundred powerful phrases in the book, this is my favorite
of all of them. And this is what would a
successful outcome do for you? So all the time we're
asking what would success look like? But when you say
what would a successful oulcome do for you, You're going
to level deeper. So imagine you and I are working
on a project together and our boss gives it to
us a Monday and we have to read out on
(11:31):
it to the executive team following Monday. We know exactly
what the project is about. But if we take five
minutes and I say, hey, what would a successful outcome
do for you? Barry? And you go, you know what
I got to tell you. I have been working like
seventy hour weeks for last three weeks, and what successful
outcome would do for me is we walk out of
here at five o'clock with a bow on this thing,
so I don't think about it until Monday morning.
Speaker 2 (11:51):
I love that rather than what it looks like what
it would do for you, So it makes much more
personal and make it much more achievement oriented. Personal achievement oriented.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Yeah, and I might say, you know what a successful
income would do for me is my boss does not
see my genius around this stuff. So when the really
tough questions come on Monday, can I answer a couple
of them so he gets that I know what I'm doing,
all right. So that's a clarity, curiosity, what do you
suggest we do next?
Speaker 2 (12:18):
You know?
Speaker 3 (12:19):
Or what can I do to most supports you right now,
which is really a by one get one free, because
that's a connection one as well as curiosity.
Speaker 2 (12:26):
But a lot of managers or owners in small businesses
has a hard time dealing with conflict, so they avoid it.
What's your advice from them? So?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Yeah, So that's so we have three questions that we
encourage you to ask yourself if you want to avoid
the conflict, if there's a conversation you know you should
have but you don't want to have. The first is,
you know, why does what you have to say matter?
Why does it matter for your relationship? Why does it
matter for the outcome? Why does it matter for your
(12:58):
small business? Why does it matter for your customers? Why
does what you have to say matter? What's at stake?
If you stay silent for all those things? And then finally,
imagine that you've had this conversation and you're on the
other side of it. You might not have gotten everything
you wanted, but you have been heard. What is the
emotion that you're feeling? And when I asked that question
(13:20):
in keynotes all the time, so you know, a couple
of thousand people in the audience, and I'm just shout out,
what is the emotion that you will heard? Number one
answer all the time is relief?
Speaker 2 (13:31):
Absolutely. I was just gonna say that, Karen, How's gonna
shut out? Relief?
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Great? And that's the thing, that's that's why we read
the book because we want people to feel less stressed
and more relief.
Speaker 2 (13:42):
Yeah. I mean, one of my favorite phrases of all
time is Robert Louis Stevenson who says the only way
out is through. And no matter why we don't want
to have these conversations that have to deal with conflict,
we got to do it. What happens, You know, a
lot of managers are put in the place where it's
not a conflict with them. It's not a conflict with
the person in the organsa. It's a personal conflict between
two people. Perhaps, let's say they're two managers. How do
(14:05):
you navigate that? Because you know that your team is
weaker because these two people don't get along.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
Yeah, So the first thing that I would do is
give them some skills, right, So first I'd hand them
the book.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
But of course the book being powerful phrase for dealing
with workplace conflict and courageous cultures. Just sposed to be
very clear about what the book is. This isn't a Bible.
Speaker 3 (14:27):
This is the other book right exactly. And that's a
good book. The Bible's good, but.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
Also best selling of all time, so you know.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
But really our book is designed so you can go
to the table of context and if you contents and
if you are in what we call an ACE and
acute conflict emergency, it's like somebody just stole credit for
my idea. My boss is a micro manager. Whoever those
two people are, there is likely a chapter for that.
So that's the first thing is give them some phrases,
help them empower them. But I will also tell you
(14:57):
that it's really encouraging to have the conversation. One of
the things that I do for one of our clients
is I go once a quarter and I have like
office hours where I go sit in the conference room
and people can come in and just talk to me
about anything that's going on in the business. I had
this one guy come in and he's like spitting teeth. Man,
he was so angry and he's like, ah, she doesn't care,
(15:19):
and had this and I said, you do realize you
both want exactly the same thing, right, clarity, that's not true,
I said, Oh yeah, she was just in here. You
guys want both both want exactly the same thing. This
is the outcome you're both trying to achieve. Go talk
to her, have the conversation. He came back, He's like,
you know what I have wasted? Did three months of
(15:41):
my life being stressed out, losing sleep over this? You
know it's true, we both want exactly the same thing.
I'm like, right, so how do you get there? How
do you show up curious about how you can support
one another? And just the fact that they had the conversation.
So that's the advice I would give to the manager.
Do that encourage them to have the conversation.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
So you don't think the manager should be the efficient,
right should be the official. You suggest them to talk
to each other direct.
Speaker 3 (16:08):
That's where I would certainly start.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Because one things I keep thinking is, you know this
is back in my days when I used to run
businesses back in the nineties, was I don't care if
you guys get along, You've got to be able to
work it out, right, And you think they have a
better chance of working out if they talk with each other,
not between with you or through you.
Speaker 3 (16:28):
Here's one yes, and here's one caveat to that. You've
got to make sure that you haven't set up organizational
structures and systems that is causing the conflict. So when
we were doing writing the book, we talked to Ralph Kilman,
who is the founder of the Thomas Killman one of
the co founders of Thomas Killman. In Conflict Assessment, I
(16:48):
asked him if I could call him the grandfather of
workplace conflict research, and he said yes. But he's really
really famous for his deep, deep work in colon and
the you know he talks about most conflict is caused
by systems. And I think about I was at Verizon
(17:08):
for twenty years before I founded Letscore Leaders, which is
our company, and you know, I had this I think
about this time, I had this massive, massive conflict with
this guy and when I think about it, he was
a really nice human being, but we could not get along.
But here's why. I led a twenty two hundred person
sales team that was the retail sales stores, so all
(17:30):
the retail stores that are Verison in a certain region.
He had all the indirect Channel stores that were in
the exact same region, right, So our stores were competing
against one another, and you know, it's hard to collaborate
when your whole team's quotas are at stake for what
the other person does or doesn't do.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Right, Right, So how did you resolve that.
Speaker 4 (17:57):
I did it?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
I was terrible. I didn't use anything.
Speaker 2 (17:59):
That's why I've eventually wrote the book.
Speaker 3 (18:03):
Yeah, you know, but I mean that's you know, we
say in one of our other books, winning, Well, you
know the conflict. You know, you know, your competition is
not the person in the cube next door, right, it's mediocrity.
But in that case, I really did view him as
the competition, as opposed to you know, Sprint being the
real competition. But I was losing more sales to him
(18:26):
than I was a Sprint.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
So if you look into your crystal ball for the future,
are you hopeful that conflict will be able to work
through and the worst being avoided?
Speaker 3 (18:36):
I am very, very optimistic that when people take the
time to have the conversation, when they look at the
conflicts and they diagnose what is needed most is a connection, clarity, curiosity,
or commitment, and make an effort either using our powerful
phrases or any other way to have the conversation. I
see it happen all this time. I am seeing it work.
(19:00):
So it's the But I think the first piece is
do you want to resolve the conflict right? Because here's
the thing. Conflict in itself isn't necessarily bad. So David
Die is my husband and co author. We've written several
books together. We worked, we'd run a global leadership development firm.
We have conflict every single day, and it's because I
(19:21):
have my p and you're right exactly.
Speaker 2 (19:26):
Exactly. He would just see it my way, we'd be okay, right.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
But inherently in our relationship, in our business relationship, we
are set up to have conflict. I am moving fast,
I'm the move in the strategy. How fast do we go?
And he's like, you know, let's get this right, let's
low this down, let's operationalize this right. That is, there's
going to be inherent conflict, but it's how we have
that conflict. On the other side of that conflict, things
are better. Our writing is better, our our relationships with
(19:53):
our customers are better, our outcomes are better because we're
both bringing different perspectives. But if we just avoided that
conflict or just rolled over and said, yeah, do whatever
you want, we wouldn't have those good outcomes.
Speaker 2 (20:05):
I also think that if people get together as people,
and I mean just really one on one with really
nothing to prove, and they see the humanity of the
other person rather being anonymous online or sending the emails
like you talked about, when people see other folks exactly
as people they see themselves. So I think the conflicts
resolve themselves. I really do if people just talk.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
I love that. You know, Berne Brown says, you know,
it's hard to hate people up close.
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Absolutely, she says it much better than me. But yeah,
that's what I meant. That's what I've meant, so, Karen.
The title of the book is called Powerful Phrases from
dealing with Workplace Conflict and Courageous Cultures. I got to
run out and get it, especially for one of my clients.
Where can people catch up with you and learn more
about the work you're doing?
Speaker 3 (20:50):
Thank you so much. Yeah. So, our website is Let's
Grow leaders dot com and if you go to the
tab for books, you'll see all of our books listed there.
So that's one easy way. Of course, it is a
powerful phrases for dealing with workplace conflict is available anywhere
books are sold. If you are since your podcast listener,
you're probably rather listen to the book, and so it
(21:11):
is available on audible read by both of us and
people tell us, Hey, you know, I feel like you're
driving around in my car giving me advice.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
So and you read it better than your husband. No,
that's just another conflict. So that's all good. Karen, thanks
so much for joining us. There's a small business radio show.
We'll be right back. My work with thousands of small
business owners over the last twenty years inspired me to
write my next book and how to make Changes. Well,
(21:39):
that's not exactly true. More accurately, my frustration and the
resulting challenges working with small business owners forced me to
write this new book. Let me explain. I'm often asked
by companies and small business owners that I don't know
to help them. Typically, they're feeling stuck by a problem
and their companies can't move forward. After analyzes situation, we
(22:00):
mutually decide on a go forward strategy. I help them
assemble a detailed plan to make any changes and the
critical sess factors and actions that need to be completed,
they agree that taking these actions will help them solve
their issue for their company and make them more money,
and then almost nothing happens. Unfortunately, most small business owners
(22:23):
implement a few easy steps but never take the critical
or difficult ones that could make a difference. This has
long frustrated me, since we worked really hard on putting
together this plan, and at the beginning we were both
excited about the result. I wrote my new book, change Masters,
How to Actually Make the changes you already know need
(22:45):
to make to figure out why small business owners do
not make the changes or take the actions that they
know will help them reach their goals. Where is the
gap between sincere intent to make these changes and the
actions to actually do it. What holds most people back
and keeps them stuck on the same path over and
over again. Why are they still so comfortable and not
(23:07):
making these changes and staying on a path that clearly
doesn't work for them? One thing is it's not adding
to their happiness, and it's not adding to their feelings success.
What steps do they need to take to slowly break
free and start to make those changes today that will
help them in the long run. In my new book,
I reveal much of the psychological research around why change
(23:30):
is just so hard for so many people, and real
life strategies that every small business owner can employ right
now to make the changes they need to make in
their companies to grow. So get my new book, Change Masters.
Remember I'm not trying to convince you to make a change,
but rather help you make the changes you already know
you need to take.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Stick around to get your small business unstuck. More of
Small Business Radio with Barry Moles.
Speaker 2 (24:03):
We've all heard really over the last eight years, make
America great again? Really to add nauseum, But what about
making America healthy again? And how will Robert Kennedy being
confirmed as the head of the Health Secretary of the
US change all this, and how as small business owners
can we live healthier, longer and more productive lives. My
(24:25):
next guest is doctor Michael Aziz, who's a renowned interners
anti aging her Jeneit physicians specialist Praxie at Lenox Hill
Hospital in New York City. Doctor Z's regularly provides medical
commentary on many health networks. He is also the author
of a book called The Ageless Revolution. Doctor Z's Welcome
to the show.
Speaker 4 (24:45):
Thank you so much for having you darry.
Speaker 2 (24:47):
So as I age, I keep thinking that so much
of aging is just genetics. It's kind of like the
hand youard del Is that true or can you do
a lot about it?
Speaker 4 (25:00):
No? Actually that's amiss. And eighty percent of how we
age depends upon the things we do in life, from
diet to sleep to exercise. Only genetics only play twenty
percent role in how we get how we age.
Speaker 2 (25:18):
So if you want to live longer, and again I
don't think just living longer and not being able to
have your mental facilities or be able to move is
really any great prize. But if you want to live
a longer, healthier life, what do you tell your patients
of first one or two things that they really have
to do as early as possible.
Speaker 4 (25:37):
The problem is, I really have to change the mindset
not only of my patients, but also of the people
who are going to read my book. Because I'm treating
aging as a disease. Many of my patients are stuck
in the old model of going to the doctor once
a year doing routine blood test checking their cholesterol or CVC.
But that's not going to affect aging in many ways.
(25:57):
For us to age better, we need a very very
proactive approach about knowing all the advances in medicine that
happened the last twenty years that can make us not
only have a better health span, but a longer life span.
Speaker 2 (26:13):
So, for example, doctor, these what practices on a daily
basis should we be doing?
Speaker 4 (26:19):
I think when it comes to longevity, the most important
of course is diet, and diets play a huge role
in longevity. We see that in the Blue zones and
the countries in the world where they live to eighty
eight and ninety, like Monaco they lift the ninety. Hong
Kong they lift to eighty eight, and they eat mostly
a plant based diet. We are really following the wrong
(26:40):
diets here in this country. Between low fat they're very
high in sugar, low carb diets and keito which are
now in trend are very high and animal protein and
processed meat and artificial sweeteners. We know that nitrites and
bacont sausage damage to DNA. They eat the cancer and
unfortunately that's the trend going right now. In many of
the magia. You see how many people are successful on
(27:02):
low carbon and all those popular diets. But really we
are on the wrong tracks when it comes to longevity.
Speaker 2 (27:08):
So how did we get here really as Americans? Is
it because the advertising is so good for these companies
to get us to eat, or because for a lot
of America where things are a lot more plentiful, food's
a lot more plentiful than other parts of the world.
Speaker 4 (27:24):
I think the problem is we're eating too much processed food,
and I think we've been brainwashed by the lobbyist that
the processed food is better for us. So many people
don't eat eggs. They think cereals are better. We don't
eat better. We think vegetable oils are good for us.
So all that stuff, you know, all the seed oil,
cotton seed corn causes inflammation. And those lobbyists also influence
(27:47):
the guidelines from the government. Like the original usd with
pyramids lost. Our diets were really invented by politicians back
in the seventies. They had no scientific basis. Sugar is
the worst thing you could do to age, and as
a result, we were lost as a society and we
just followed whatever people tell us to be. Anybody who's
(28:08):
no education writes a book and then before you know
it's your following this trend. And that's why we really
have to get back to basics. It's eating natural food,
eating natural fats, butter, olive oil, avocados, and eating more
vegetables and less animal products and no chemicals.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Well, Americans have always been into trends in fads. How
do you think this these guidelines might change under you know,
perhaps new you know Health Secretary Robert Kennedy Jr.
Speaker 4 (28:37):
I am not sure about his position. I know his
position on TRT, which is good because he takes what's
I think he has a what's TRT?
Speaker 2 (28:46):
What's TRT? Don't? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (28:48):
Yeah, yeah, And he looks good on TV when he
takes his shirt off. He looks about the health of Yeah,
so he's concerned about the health in the country. He
has some views that, you know, the fast food should
change to animal fats for cooking instead of the seed oils.
So yeah, I think there are very very valid points.
(29:08):
And I hope he surrounds himself with good people can
help him guide him, because I don't think he's a physician.
Speaker 2 (29:13):
So so what why do why do like like what
I think the average age that I think men live
to in the US is like early seventies and women
live to like mid seventies. Why do women live longer
than men.
Speaker 4 (29:27):
It has to do with the fact that they stostone
and sex hormones. So estrogen progesterone in women lead to
a longer longevity. Uh, and dystostroone. If you do too much,
that could be also harmful. So that's why men die
more than women.
Speaker 2 (29:44):
What about stress? You know that that is a really
big factor for a lot of small business owners. How
does stress affect the aging process? Oh?
Speaker 4 (29:54):
Stress, I talked about it a lot in the book
The Asiless Revolution, because stress plays a huge role in longevity.
One is it affects a hormone call influence and before
you know it, if you have too much stress, you
can end up with diabetes. You can have high streng level,
you end up gaining weight. Many people who are just
they can eat the same number of galleries and then
(30:15):
one is stressed, one is not. The person who stress
can gain weight at leads too. You know, insomnia like
a sleep, and like a sleep, you are making a
hormone called melatonin. Melatonin is just not a sleep hormone.
It is the most important antioxidant in the body that
protects the mitochondria or the battery of ourselves. So stress
(30:36):
affects longevity. And then finally, also too much stress shortens
the telomeres. Those are the end cap of the chromosomes.
And when people have shorter telomeres, they have shorter life.
So if you're stressed, that's not good. That's going to
mean probably a shorter life.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
So what kinds of people usually come to see you.
Is it people that already have a problem and they're
trying to overcome an acute problem, or folks in general,
and just say listen, you know, I'm sixty five years old.
I want the next twenty years to be my best years.
Speaker 4 (31:10):
I'm a traditional doctor, but are trained to be a
functional doctor. Side treat aging as a disease, and as
I see in your patient, I see what issues they have,
I deal with that, but I also educate them about
what they need to do to fight aging on the
sailor level, because that's a very brand new approach that
no one is doing. You know, you go to the doctor,
they we do with your blood pressure or your high
(31:32):
sugar or high cholesterol, but they don't deal with the
issues all the vitamin deficiencies. We have to fix all
the hormonal changes that have to be fixed fighting aging
the whole months of aging that I talk about in
the book, because really the reasons we age is the
self tut to malfunction. So basically I'm dealing with why
(31:52):
the cell deteriorate, why do they malfunction, why they stop
working in the eventry dye. So you want to extend
the life cycle of the cells, and we do that
by targeting the whole months of aging.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
So doctors, I've written a lot about how hard it
is for people to change their habits right, and they
really only do it, in my opinion, when they're in
a lot of pain. How have you seen patients effectuate
change in their lives, whether it's diet or stress or
just to live differently.
Speaker 4 (32:23):
I think people have to be motivated. It has to
be something in you that tells you I need to
be healthy. For me, it comes from the fact that
all of a sudden, I found myself older, I did
not like how I look, and I had to change.
I had to lose weight, I had to control my
sugar intake, I had to drop my cholesterol, I had
(32:43):
to drop my high sugar that I was pre diabetic.
And it was something in me that led me to
develop this plan and write to share my information and
my story in this book to asious revolution. But it
really is up to the person. I've also just talked
to a recent billionaire in New York and he's very
much overweight. I will not mention his name, and he
(33:05):
was not interested. So you know, you cannot. It has
to be after the person to be interested and changing
their life. You know.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
It's interesting to me because about thirty years ago, I
got diabetes when I was thirty five, and the way
I found out was that I had blurry vision and
that really kind of scared the crap out of me.
And so I really believe that when you have a
scary incident, it really does propel you to more change
rather than just oh, you know, I can deal with
what's going on.
Speaker 4 (33:35):
Yes. Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (33:37):
You talk about in the book how your chronological age
doesn't matter, right, but it's really the biological age that
we should focus on. Tell us the difference between those two.
Speaker 4 (33:49):
So chronological age is the date that we were born
or our birthday, and that you can lie about. I'm
like thirty five.
Speaker 2 (34:01):
Yes, yes, how old I am? Right?
Speaker 4 (34:05):
I don't know. Everything is on Google now everything you
can google it. Biological age is the new concept in medicine.
It tells the age of ourselves, and that you cannot
lie about because there are tests to tell you how
old are yourself, and that's based on your lifestyle, the
things you do. Somebody could be twenty, but they're doing
(34:26):
all the wrong things. They're doing drugs, they're smoking, and
their biological age it could be forty or someone who
is fifty or sixty and they're doing all the right
things and their biological age is at a much younger age.
Speaker 2 (34:38):
Can you turn back the biological clock?
Speaker 4 (34:42):
Sure? Yes, with all that's That's what the Age's Revolution
is all about. It's turning back the clock. It's slowing
the aging process and turning back the clock with a
variety of weapons. So I talk about lifestyle in the
first part of the book, but then I go and
talk about diet. I copy the diets of all those
blue zones and where people live to be ninety to
(35:05):
see what they do, and then I move on to
supplements and medications and peptides, hormone replacement, all the weapons
that fight the biological age.
Speaker 2 (35:17):
All right, So, of course the biggest question is how
does alcohol affect your biological age.
Speaker 4 (35:24):
So alcohol is a little bit of a hormetic stress.
It affects the cells in certain ways in small amounts
and moderation. It's okay. We see many countries many people
live to be one hundred and beyond not drinking a
little bit. But I think alcohol in access is very bad.
So alcohol, if you exceed the six seven drinks a week,
(35:46):
increases mortality by causing liver damage, liver zoses, high blood pressure,
increases the risk for sosha gel cancer, and so on.
Speaker 2 (35:56):
Now you know, cannabis is league recreational legal in a
lot of states. Has there been any research or have
you had any done any research on how cannabis affects
the aging process?
Speaker 4 (36:08):
There are some, but it damages brain cells. It's not good.
And we have an epidemic of Alzheimer's disease in this
country of what kind of disease?
Speaker 2 (36:17):
Again, what kind of disease Alzheimer's Alzheimer's ease?
Speaker 4 (36:21):
Yeah, yeah, so you know, and then when you use
cannabis and all that stuff, then you have to smoke,
and that's not good.
Speaker 3 (36:29):
All the.
Speaker 4 (36:30):
It's just not good. So it does damage to DNA
as well.
Speaker 2 (36:34):
Why do you think we're seeing so much more Alzheimer's.
It just because it's getting diagnosed more or there's really
something going on.
Speaker 4 (36:40):
Here, there's more diagnosis. But definitely the fact is that
the task so all the big diseases that the age
raated diseases, diabetes, heart attack, stroke, and dementia is all
related to sugar high sugar intake.
Speaker 2 (36:56):
And so if you reduce your intake, you'll have less
of a chance of getting those disease long term.
Speaker 4 (37:03):
Correct, you know you have you know one third of
the country are pre diabetic. Yeah, seventy percent of Americans
are overweight, and that is calling and fueling the epidemic
of age related diseases that we see even in young people,
from high cholesterol, high levels of heart attacks, now Indians
(37:27):
just everything.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
So what's your outlook on I guess a healthy America.
Do you see things changing and evolving or it's kind
of status quo.
Speaker 4 (37:39):
I think it's going to take a lot of education.
It's going to take a whole generation of doctors like
myself to deal with aging as a disease, know the
whole marks of aging. I'm probably the first doctor and
who authors the book to target aging as a disease
and throwing the kitchens think at all the whole marks
of aging. Many doctors do not know that will also
(38:00):
take individual every person will be responsible to be educated
by what they put in their bodies, and will also
take the government to take care of us as regard
you know, banning certain artificial stuff, the dye that they
put in our food, regented agriculture. You know, it's not
just enough to eat organic food and avoiding the pesticides,
(38:21):
but also to get the whole spectrum of the nutrition
that the people in the boozon't eat.
Speaker 2 (38:27):
Yeah, so I think one of the I don't know.
Do you think that one of the problems with people
eating healthier is the cost because it's very cheap to
go and convenience to go to fast food, which is
really isn't good for you, but it's a lot harder
to eat healthy. Is that a barrier for a lot
of people?
Speaker 4 (38:44):
I think so. I think it's a big barrier. But
I talk in my book that the biggest barrier we
have is really not the whole box of aging. It's
a barrier that we put in front of ourselves. Will say,
you know, I'm too tired to work out it's too
cold today. I don't have them need to work out.
People have to Health should be their number one priority.
They can cut on their expenses whatever they do. I
(39:07):
see people paying eight hundred dollars to go see tailor
Switt right exactly. They don't want to say for a supplement.
So you got you gotta set. People have to set
their priority straight. Health is the most important thing that
you have to deal with.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
That's funny. Well, the title of the book is called
The Ageless Revolution. Where can people catch up with you online?
Doctor Disease?
Speaker 4 (39:27):
They can go through my website Wwwageless Revolution dot com
or my office website Michael AZIZMD dot com.
Speaker 2 (39:36):
Doctor Z's thanks for being here, and I want to
thank everyone for being part of the radio show. This week.
I got to thank our incredible staff, our booking producer
Sarah Schaffern, our video and sound editor Ethan Moltz. If
you're serious about being more successful in twenty twenty five,
give me a call. I've set up a private line
seven seven three eight three seven eight two five zero
or email me at Barry at Molts dot com. Remember
(39:59):
love everyone, trust a few and paliown canoe have a
profitable and passionate week.
Speaker 1 (40:05):
You can find Barrymoltz on the web at Barrymolts dot com,
or more episodes of Small Business Radio at small Business
radioshow dot com.
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