Armadillo Alcatraz - TUE 7.1

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This song is called Bosier City. It's a song that
embodies the heartbeat of a group of people that really
hate Shreveport for severy That's.

Speaker 2 (00:08):
The one thing we can guarantee about the folks from Bosher.
There's a you know that rival between football teams. This
is between actual cities, one on each side of the river.
Are they still lobbing insults back and.

Speaker 3 (00:25):
Forth hate each other?

Speaker 1 (00:26):
Russia and Ukraine, Israel and Palestine, y'all got nothing on Shreveport, Boser, you.

Speaker 2 (00:30):
Know, them Indians and him Pakistani is the way Barack
will say. You know, they used to lob actual explosives
back and forth across the border at each other. You
don't think it's going to come to that at some point, Bojia,
do you.

Speaker 3 (00:44):
I mean, it probably already has, I'll be honest with you.

Speaker 1 (00:46):
But then there's like a bunch of casinos there to
block it off, and those things are industrial strength.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
Plus the people that work security for the casinos, they
ain't gonna put up with that.

Speaker 3 (00:56):
No, they're not messing around at all.

Speaker 1 (00:58):
They've got a tennis racket just for knocking the explosives
into the river, slapping them back at you. They got
a guy out there. His name's Pete, and he just
he's really fast. He's wiry, I think, is a wirey.
You got to watch out for the wiy.

Speaker 3 (01:10):
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 1 (01:11):
Bill Barr has cleared Trump in the Epstein controversy. Not
what you were expecting. Bill Barr not Trump's biggest fan.
The former Attorney general told House investigators yesterday that he's
looked at all the documents. There's nothing that ties Trump
to Jeffrey Epstein. And believe me, he would really like
to make that true. What documents I heard There was
no file. Okay, there's no list. I think at this

(01:34):
time it's safe to assume there are documents. There are are,
because he just said he looked at him. They've just
been corrupted and they won't show us. I hate to
be the guy who believes anything our government tells us,
but it doesn't. The explanation we've been given that those
files have been corrupted and tainted by the former administration,
that does kind of pass my smell test. I mean,

(01:54):
I'm not saying I completely believe it, but if that
turned out to be true, it wouldn't shock me. It
wouldn't if it turned out to be a lie i'd be.
Wouldn't shock you at all, either, would it. No, I
assume the government's gonna lie to us, even when it's
the good guy.

Speaker 3 (02:07):
Sure, I assume it is.

Speaker 1 (02:08):
But anyway, the ex administrative official is the first person
who appear in the House Oversight Committee's trobe into the
federal probe into the federal government's handling of the Epstein case.
And what he said yesterday was pretty explained. I mean, remember,
Bill Barr is a neo Conti's from the George Bush
wing of the Republican Party. He never liked Trump. He
was never that helpful to Trump. He was never really

(02:31):
one to.

Speaker 2 (02:32):
Unless he starts running for some office somewhere, and then
he'll he'll be like John Cornyan, he'll be the best
buddy Trump ever had.

Speaker 3 (02:39):
I don't know.

Speaker 1 (02:40):
I mean, guy's seventies, in his late seventies now, at
this point, it's hard to imagine he would run for anything.
He's been the Attorney general twice and been in government
a long time. I mean, you look back at his
record here of how long he's been working for Here's
a photo of him with Ronald Reagan and he's a
lawyer back.

Speaker 4 (02:58):
And he wasn't a child.

Speaker 3 (03:00):
He worked out.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
He worked for the CIA in the early seventies. To
put this point, here's here's what's crazy. And this is
going to sound nuts just some of our listeners, But
look at young Bell Bar like, I'm not gay or anything,
but he's not a bad looking guy back then, right
where well, I mean compared to now. You look at
Bill Barr and he looks like job of the Hut
put glasses on. Is not not a great looking guy,
you know.

Speaker 2 (03:20):
But well, I think things being you know, different back
in the eighties, like nutrition health.

Speaker 3 (03:28):
People didn't know cocaine was bad for them back then.

Speaker 2 (03:31):
That that's helpful too, But we also weren't eating nearly
as much of the processed food and the chemicals that
are in just the kid's food, all of our food,
and it is making America, well the world really, but
America faster, I think, rapidly becoming o besier, obeseer morab.

Speaker 1 (03:52):
Which actually speaks, which would explain why Texas needed bigger
migrant detention facilities. I mean, let's face, we got some
big boys in those things. These guys are eating tortillas
and what else are they eating? Their tortas and casadillas
and all that.

Speaker 4 (04:09):
Is there a difference between all that stuff.

Speaker 1 (04:10):
Nah, it's all pretty much the same thing. But they're
eating a lot of it. So we needed bigger.

Speaker 2 (04:13):
Get you a tortilla, Yeah, you got you some meat,
usually some cheese, and maybe some ban Oh.

Speaker 1 (04:19):
God, we forgot to ask Attorney General Ken past It
about that, about what, well, they didn't put cheese on
our tacos?

Speaker 3 (04:25):
What should be the punishment.

Speaker 2 (04:26):
That is definitely a crime of some kind. I'm not
saying not put cheese on a breakfast taco. I'm not
saying it's a felony. But they got to get a
ticket or a fine or something. Anyway, we need.

Speaker 1 (04:36):
Bigger facilities, and Texas has stepped up and said let's
get all these fat illegal immigrants into a bigger detention space.

Speaker 5 (04:43):
The largest federal migrant detention center in American history has
opened its doors. It is the latest effort to keep
up with the Trump administration.

Speaker 1 (04:51):
Pause, look at this girl right here. This is what
I'm talking about. That's called a torta. Do you know
what a tortas? I hang out with a lot of
Latinos in Texas because I you know where I live.
When I go out drinking with my boys. They always
tell me how they want to find a torta because
she goes.

Speaker 2 (05:04):
That's going to be as easy to get with that.

Speaker 3 (05:08):
See you know what that means.

Speaker 4 (05:10):
That's right.

Speaker 1 (05:10):
The first time one of my buddies told me, Pablo
told me he wanted to get some tortas tonight. I
was like, I was like, Oh, there's a food truck
park right over here. He's like, no, Kenny, not just
saying I don't want to eat tortas.

Speaker 3 (05:20):
I want to eat tortase. And I did not know
what he was talking about. I was very confused by that.

Speaker 1 (05:25):
You should stop hanging out with those people anyway. Apparently
this woman is a torta. And I don't mean that
as an insult. Let my Latino friends love.

Speaker 5 (05:31):
Themtion's mass deportation Agenda A migrant processing facility in Fort Bliss, Texas,
near the US Mexico border, officially opening today. And News
Nation correspondent jorgevan Toura is live in Texas. Or Hey,
who is expected? And how many?

Speaker 1 (05:47):
That's my boy, dude. We go out drinking all the time.
That's my guy, dude. This guy right here, Jorge, he
was the one that told me about Tortas. Do you
think him and her Pablo, I know more than one Latino.
I live in Texas, Bro, Do you think I just
know Pablo? Come on, dude, I know Jorge. I know
Pabloblo's last name. I'm not going to say it out
of the family. I don't want him to get deported any

(06:08):
Leave him alone for a little. How dare you?

Speaker 3 (06:10):
Pablo is a danger to pack this mega facility.

Speaker 6 (06:15):
When Natasha the Tile Administration continues to expand their mass
deportition operation, and now we are learning that fourth Place
is set to open today as an ICE attention facility
with up to a thousand beds already ready to go.

Speaker 3 (06:29):
Now, what ICE says is this is part of a billion.

Speaker 6 (06:31):
Dollar project that will now reship how migrants are detained
and ultimately deported. That ICE facility opening today is part
of a one point two billion dollar defense apartment contract.

Speaker 1 (06:43):
It doesn't have a funny name. Alligator Alcatraz is funny.
That's that's why you do stuff like that. You can
remember that. So what are we gonna call this one?
Probably Armadello Alcatraz would be cool. The problem is Armadello's
aren't scary. They just smell bad.

Speaker 4 (06:55):
Yeah, how about the red ain't ranch?

Speaker 3 (06:57):
The red oh billy? That is good man.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
All that nasty stuff we got came from somewhere else.
Everything was fine here. All of a sudden people started
bringing armadilla's up and pythons and red ants and killer
bees and murder hornets. You know, we don't have any
of that problem when I was a kid. Now, look
how they messed everything up. They got rattlesnakes out there
right right? Yeah, but that's cool. And where do the
horny toads go? I do miss the horny toads? How

(07:22):
about like cobD they said, the red ants? So the
reason the horny toads are in such a built disparity
of numbers?

Speaker 4 (07:29):
Really?

Speaker 3 (07:30):
Tell me, mar what does that mean?

Speaker 4 (07:31):
Ants?

Speaker 3 (07:32):
The ants are killing the horny Yeah, enough of them?

Speaker 4 (07:35):
They can they gang up?

Speaker 3 (07:37):
Wow?

Speaker 4 (07:37):
It's gang violence, then, is what that is?

Speaker 3 (07:39):
It sounds racist? It is racist.

Speaker 1 (07:42):
It's not just me right, I feel like I don't
know if you're rubbing off on me. But when I
hear something like that, I haven't yet. That is not
what I That is not what that meant. Oh sorry, easy, okay,
then never mind all right, we got a wild Florida
man coming up that involves raccoons. You're gonna like it.
But you know, we need a little good news to sprinkle.

Speaker 3 (07:58):
In this morning. What do you do?

Speaker 4 (08:00):
Well, don't look at the Astros game last night, Dan,
That ain't good news.

Speaker 3 (08:03):
All right, sports coming up after this, but real quick.

Speaker 1 (08:05):
A police officer in Ohio had to catch an escaped
peacock and it had a name, mister Kenneth.

Speaker 3 (08:11):
The peacock's name was Kevin. Kevin. I love it. I
love it too. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (08:15):
The chesscam footage is actually pretty funny. The owner told
him it might respond to its name, Kevin, so the
officer used it quite a bit.

Speaker 3 (08:24):
Kevin. This is how he caught Kevin. The advised, this
is a lost peacock. Six has the owner and you're out.
We're just going to kind and keep it on the
post property. Kevin, you need to go back to them, Kevin,
do not come here. Kevin's coming back your way, advised.
Vin is attempting, sweet Paul. Kevin is thrilled. Kevin the peacock.

(08:45):
That's cute. Yeah he's safe.

Speaker 4 (08:47):
Now.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
You know. I like that news story for two reasons.
It's funny that his name was Kevin. And also the
word peacock is kind of a funny word, isn't it It is? Yeah,
I'm the.

Speaker 4 (08:55):
Start listening to the Walton and Johnson Network featuring Steve
Johnson and Kenny Be a handsome guy.

Speaker 1 (09:01):
By the way, I didn't It's usually not my thing,
but he is a good looking schucker. He must be
the new guy discovered eight new genes linked to schizophrenia. Okay,
all right, it's actually more like one gene with eight
different personalities.

Speaker 2 (09:15):
But the most importantly is Sydney Sweeney going to be
in the commercial for these new genes?

Speaker 3 (09:20):
Oh? My god, I hope.

Speaker 4 (09:21):
So that's all we want.

Speaker 1 (09:23):
The world's oldest living chicken is fourteen guys fourteen fourteen
years old. Oh, which isn't that big of a deal.
The world's oldest chicken nugget just turned forty.

Speaker 4 (09:32):
I don't know that's true. Yeah, yeah, I wonder if
they knew each other.

Speaker 1 (09:35):
Also, I don't know what Lauren Sanchez. I don't know
what she was thinking. She has a three hundred thousand
dollars watch, still not as expensive as her face lift,
but I well, yeah, it's a lot though you know,
but were there right? Yeah, sure, I guess I don't know.

Speaker 3 (09:51):
What is it? Jeff Bezos wants her to be the
new Bond Girl.

Speaker 1 (09:54):
Oh really, Greg Gottfeld, It'll be the first time ever
where James Bond doesn't want to do the Bond Girl.

Speaker 2 (10:02):
I guess if you've got that much money, you just
don't think anything's out of reach. You know what, I'll
just reach out to some of my powerful friends and
spend some money and I'll get you that job for
your birthday, honey.

Speaker 1 (10:14):
I guess if he could afford to have the movie made,
he can decide who's in it, right.

Speaker 2 (10:19):
Man, If he's making the movie, it's like that celebrity
death you were going to report on earlier and then
forgot about because that Alan Dershowitt, the fancy lawyer.

Speaker 4 (10:30):
His son has died.

Speaker 3 (10:34):
And man.

Speaker 4 (10:35):
Now let's time the cab for another edition of medical Coincidences, and.

Speaker 3 (10:43):
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Speaker 2 (10:47):
As far as medical coincidences going, is it a coincidence
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Speaker 1 (11:04):
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Speaker 3 (11:14):
Do it for me.

Speaker 4 (11:15):
That's no good man.

Speaker 1 (11:16):
My knees would hurt when I go out and run
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tried the get the T dot com joint support. I
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my knees don't hurt anymore.

Speaker 3 (11:27):
So that it did the trick.

Speaker 1 (11:28):
You just take it regularly and after some amount of time,
not terribly long, boom, just like that. All right, Today
we tell you the story of Ellen Dershowitz. Elon Elon Dershowitz,
excuse me, elo In. He is a film and podcast producer,
but you would probably know him better by his father,
the prominent attorney Alan Dershowitz.

Speaker 3 (11:47):
Elon is the sun. Yeah, and how old was the
Elon lean.

Speaker 1 (11:50):
His sixty sixty early sixties sixty four here, which is
interesting because his dad is alive and well but he
just keeled over all the.

Speaker 2 (11:57):
Say hanged out something. You just never know, do you.
He had him a stroke, they said. And when he
says film producer, you know what it means. It means
his daddy's rich. He's got money, and he didn't want
to work for a living. So he decided to take
some of daddy's money and his money and make movies,

(12:19):
films or whatever.

Speaker 4 (12:20):
And that means he just gets to be the money guy.

Speaker 3 (12:22):
It worked out pretty well.

Speaker 1 (12:23):
He was the co producer of something called Reversal of Fortune,
which won in Oscar back in nineteen ninety and it
starred Jeremy Irons, who won the Academy Award for Best Actor,
plus Glenn Close held as one of the standout film
as if it's era, I've never heard of it.

Speaker 4 (12:37):
I've heard of it, but I don't remember what it
was about or anything.

Speaker 1 (12:41):
Dershowitz went on to co produce a bunch of other films,
Falling starring Denzel Washington, Oliver.

Speaker 3 (12:48):
Stone's Wall Street, The Whole Truth, The.

Speaker 4 (12:50):
Advocates, Street, Didn't You Sure?

Speaker 3 (12:51):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (12:52):
Yeah, The Advocates, Devil Martians, Go Home, Talk Radio, and
Dream Lover.

Speaker 2 (12:57):
You'd have been cool if he'd had done. Shane has
a good movie right there. Everybody ought to be involved
with that. Shane.

Speaker 3 (13:02):
Yeah, you know what, I like his kill Bill? You
ever see kill Bill too?

Speaker 4 (13:05):
Do you ever see Shane?

Speaker 3 (13:06):
Yeah? I see shame shamee.

Speaker 4 (13:07):
Do you see Shane too?

Speaker 3 (13:08):
You ever see Alien Verse Predator?

Speaker 4 (13:11):
What you know?

Speaker 3 (13:12):
Alien Verse Predators?

Speaker 1 (13:13):
Dude, that's a good movie when the alien comes out
and the predators like.

Speaker 3 (13:20):
That, any of the aliens.

Speaker 2 (13:21):
Like yeah, stick your teeth out and dripping acid and
stuff like you think you bad?

Speaker 4 (13:28):
You want some of this?

Speaker 3 (13:29):
Does anybody remember why there's movie music's playing out?

Speaker 4 (13:31):
Not a clue?

Speaker 6 (13:32):
Now.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
I did bring up Sidney Sweeney for a reason, though
I love the editorial. They said, we haven't quite gotten
over it yet, the whole Sydney Sweeney Great Genes controversy,
they said The New York Times, arguing that lefties were

(13:54):
never upset about the ad, but it received headlines in Yahoo,
The Independent, Washingtons, NBC News, Fox, Salon Newsweek, MSNBC, all
claiming the choice of Sidney Sweeney as the sole faith
in their commercial is nothing but an unbridled cultural shift
toward whiteness, conservatism, and capitalist exploitation. You saw that the

(14:18):
minute you saw her face, right, Yeah, they unbridled shift
toward whiteness.

Speaker 4 (14:25):
That is that's some pretty impressive. Now. I don't think
anybody else saw that, but these people saw it.

Speaker 3 (14:32):
See.

Speaker 1 (14:32):
I always thought I liked Sidney Sweeney because she has
big jugs in a pretty face. But it turns out.

Speaker 3 (14:36):
I'm just racist.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
Yeah who knew.

Speaker 3 (14:38):
Hey, mister ow, are you racist too?

Speaker 4 (14:40):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (14:40):
No, no, that's impossible. But you like Sidney Sweeney though
you agreed that she was hot.

Speaker 2 (14:45):
But I'm not a racist material.

Speaker 3 (14:50):
Uh what do I have to do to not be racist?

Speaker 4 (14:52):
Could you be a little less white?

Speaker 1 (14:54):
I feel like I am from the waist down, And
for some reason, when I say that, it always upsets people.

Speaker 3 (14:59):
I don't know. Connor McGregor told that joke. It was
pretty funny.

Speaker 4 (15:03):
And if he upsets people, then he'll just punch them.
They don't like it.

Speaker 3 (15:06):
I'm not a puncher. I'm a lover, not a fighter.
You know, it's my thing.

Speaker 2 (15:09):
According to this, Nazi propaganda is anything that uses white
people to promote it. Uh, like this whole poster from
the fifties to join the army. Your nation needs you,
and what are they featuring unfortunately.

Speaker 4 (15:26):
Why guy, very Caucasian cocazolid.

Speaker 3 (15:30):
All right, I understand what so wrong?

Speaker 1 (15:32):
We all agree Nazis are bad, right, uh, billy ud
we all agree Nazis are bad?

Speaker 3 (15:37):
Ye, yes we do, Okay.

Speaker 1 (15:39):
I feel like if the Left goes around telling everyone
that being physically attracted to Sidney Sweeney's somebody that most
people agree, even heterosexual women agree, is attractive. If we
tell people that being attractive to her is making you
a Nazi, that is going to make a lot of
people become a Nazis.

Speaker 4 (15:59):
Right, I guess I'm a Nazi? Right, Maybe they'll do it.

Speaker 1 (16:02):
Maybe you should stop telling everyone that liking this is
the reason you're a Nazi, because everybody likes it. Even
straight women are like, wow, yeah, I mean Sidney Sweeney would.

Speaker 4 (16:11):
Be my if you lean that direction, right, I.

Speaker 1 (16:15):
Mean, every girl after three beers, you wouldn't understand, mister, kind.

Speaker 3 (16:18):
Of you think you wouldn't even believe it? Dude, I've seen.

Speaker 2 (16:22):
News out of New Orleans yesterday, called round checked on
some people to see what they was thinking about this terrible,
shocking situation with Mayor LaToya Cantreill.

Speaker 3 (16:35):
Oh yeah, LaToya the destroyer.

Speaker 2 (16:37):
Turns out the general opinion is uh, and so for
what most people are upset about. After the indictment was announced,
they said, I can't believe y'all interrupted Wheel of Fortune
to tell me that, I mean, dull. Everybody kind of figured, Yeah,
it's just another day in the neighborhood in a crestal city.

Speaker 4 (16:59):
Baby.

Speaker 3 (17:00):
Yeah, I gotta think.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
Uh, you know, this is probably gonna bring a lot
of shame in New Orleans because they're not used to
having one of the most important politicians around get arrested
and go to prison. Yeah, that's got to be new
to people in New Orleans. They've never seen that before.

Speaker 2 (17:15):
A lot of people responding in the email about Kevin
the peacock.

Speaker 3 (17:20):
Oh I love that news story.

Speaker 1 (17:21):
Yeah, you Willy, because how yall just out of curiosity,
Billy ed, how did he say it?

Speaker 4 (17:28):
He said, be cock.

Speaker 3 (17:30):
Well, it's called a peacock. Cock. Yeah, it's called a
peacock or peacock.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
You guys are putting the em fascist on the wrong salibile.

Speaker 1 (17:37):
I feel like we're all saying the same thing. I
don't understand that, this one says. I don't know if
they want their name on the radio or not. So
I have to say, uh, my kids and I just
heard about Kevin's story on the way to school, and
we too had a Kevin a few years ago. He
was a very special peacock and somewhat of a local celebrity,
named after the bird in the movie Up. People still

(18:00):
tell me how much they miss Kevin to this day.
He sounds sweet, you know. I just as you read
that email, I suddenly feel really bad because not because
of the peacock, but because so I forget that a
lot of children listen to this radio show, and I
pretty much always talk as though there's.

Speaker 3 (18:16):
No kids in the room. Mmmmm, yeah you do that.
How many kids you think are listening right now? Uh?

Speaker 4 (18:23):
Seven or eight? Boy?

Speaker 1 (18:23):
I feel guilty. I feel guilty. Af I guess I
shouldn't even do the acronym A I Kenny. Oh, thanks,
that's what I meant. Thanks, Thanks, Billy.

Speaker 4 (18:33):
What's the problem nothing? Seriously, what's the problem.

Speaker 2 (18:36):
Nothing?

Speaker 3 (18:37):
It's whatever.

Speaker 6 (18:38):
You don't care anyway.

Speaker 4 (18:39):
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