Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, if you enjoy the Walton Johnson Show like we do,
then you might also enjoy the Pursuit of Happiness show
in the afternoon with oh Kinny Webster there. And as
a matter of fact, I think, do we have a clip?
Can we play a clip?
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I don't understand these studies. I question I question the
accuracy of this. There's a new study out and they
found that prison guards have the higher highest rate of
life satisfaction. Do you believe that like guards in a
prison are happy people? I don't know. I mean, maybe
they get to hang out with their favorite rappers all day.
Who knows. I don't know. I do know this. Apparently
(00:40):
Pete Booty Jig is not really gay, I know, right,
could you that's shocking? Have you seen he looks gay?
He wears a bike helmet. Okay, let's be objective for
a minute. He pretends to ride a bike to work.
Do you remember that he was the transportation secretary and
he claimed every day he would ride his bicycle to work.
And then a journalist caught him taking his bike out
(01:01):
of the back of a van and walking it through
the parking lot of the Department of Transportation. Like all right,
you're busted, dude. So maybe he's not really gay. I
don't know. I wouldn't have thought so, but Tucker Carlson,
Tucker Carlson is opining that that's the case.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
Peoput the fake gay guy. I have a friend who
thinks he's a fake game Mike. Gay producers always say
he's not gay. He was with a girl like twenty
minutes ago. He wants to be the Democratic nominee. It's
like time for a gay guy. He's playing the long game. Well,
it's suffering for your art.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
It's suffering for your art. That is hilarious, all right.
I don't know much about pretending to be gay. I
don't know that I ever had before. I once pretended
to like soccer for an hour while I was at
a game with some friends. Is that the same thing?
Probably not here with his opinion, weighing in on this
local stand up comedian and pretend gay enthusiast Jesse Payton,
(01:50):
I don't know how to introduce you for this segment.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Dude, that's perfect right there.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
I accidentally bought a Dak Prescott Dallas Cowboy Jersey, So
I think I pretended to be gay.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
For a time as well.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
That would explain a lot. Okay, that does that will
play well with our listeners in the Dallas far Worth
are Jesse, have you ever met a person before that
was pretending to be gay? Is that a thing? I mean,
as there was a time when gay guys would pretend
to be straight in Hollywood and we all know that
was must have been a long time ago. You could
be gay in entertainment, but pretending to be gay to
get into politics. Is Pete Booty Jag just ahead of
(02:26):
his time or as he as he miscalculated what Americans
really wanted.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
That's what manufactured depression, is that there they have to
find some kind of marginal marginalization to be accepted. Now
everybody we reward victim culture and you know, gay, I
don't know. But if you take you know, if you
take a man, Yeah, and you I think you're you're
a victim, at least in my experience.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Yeah, okay, so you in your experience, Jesse, what was
your experience?
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Well, I did do time in the Harris County jail, Kenny, So,
but not to talk about that for PTSD purposes.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Ah, yes, okay, Well you know, on that note, PTSD
military veterans. We have an event coming up. For those
that don't know, we just posted the links. It is all.
We have a stand up comedy show happening on October
fifth at Bad Astronaut Brewing Company. This is Operation Comedy
Therapy twenty twenty five. You're coming back. Chad Prather is
going to be there, Kenny Webster, Steve Johnson, maybe a
(03:26):
guest or two, depending on whether or not. Jesse Payton
wants to ask one of his stand up comedy buddies
to come out and perform for free. Who knows, but
you're also playing tonight at the Houston improv with Nathaniel Amador.
He's been at Operation Comedy Therapy before, that's.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
Right, and the thing has been a key component in
Operation Comedy Therapy doing wheelchairs for warriors, and two times
he's gone with me inside Camp Hope to perform for
the veterans. The student has done so many altruistic things
for you know, for ex military members and now he's
headlining for the very first time ever at the huge
an Impropt tonight and I'll be hosting the show, so
(04:02):
it'll be tremendous show, great lineup and you know if
you want to support a good people who do good
things for you know, other good people, this will be
a great show to come to.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
That will be a great show to go check out.
I am looking at the news today and I noticed
that you often make fun of big fat lesbians. And
Donald Trump has just announced that he is giving serious
consideration to revoking Rosi o'donald's citizenship despite her being a
natural born US citizen. He's actually I don't know if
he's being serious or if he's trolling the media. Of course,
(04:31):
Allen Degener is she recently left America now Robin Wright
from House of Cards and what's that movie that she's
in Forrest Gump? All the short haired butch chicks from
Hollywood are leaving because of Donald Trump. Is Donald Trump
like the kryptonite to short haired Hollywood actresses?
Speaker 5 (04:47):
No, I think he's just making America great again. Like,
get him gone, I love it. Can we just catapult
him out of here?
Speaker 2 (04:54):
I think that'd be great. That was my idea. There's
some people that have decided that maybe using a cannon
to get the illegal immigrant side of the country is
a good way to go. I think that's inhumane. I
feel like a catapult and a big pile of pillows
on the Mexican side of the border. That would be
a little more humane, right, Yeah, but what kind.
Speaker 5 (05:11):
Of spring loaded catapult are you gonna have to get
Rosie O'Donnell's fat donkey butt across the border.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
I would imagine you could just coax her over the
border with food, of course, if she's already in Ireland.
Have you ever had Irish food before? What do they
even eat?
Speaker 3 (05:25):
I don't know. They might they might eat her, I.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Don't know, dude. Hey, sad news today for the gay community,
speaking of I guess lesbians wouldn't care. Giorgio Armani died.
I don't even know he was still alive. It says
he's ninety one. The Italian fashion designer passed away. I
gotta think it was probably the COVID vaccine or who knows, dude,
I mean, what trendy or ragua. No, they haven't explained
(05:50):
the death yet, so you know it's probably coke or
probably you know, gay sex or something.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Well.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
I'm not a fashionable dude, Kenny. In fact, I was
at a show one time wearing a button shirt and
the guy goes, hey, that's a nice shirt. Is that
BC beg And I didn't know what he meant, so
I just replied. I was like, no, this is ross.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Okay, right, I think I've shopped there before. They have
some great deals. I don't you don't do drugs, do you, Jesse,
You're not a drug user, right.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
I've never even tried drugs, Skinny. I'm high on life
and hating liberals. That's my two favorite pastimes.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
There's this woman and they call her the ketamine Queen
of Hollywood. She just pleaded guilty to supplying the drugs
that killed friends actor Matthew Perry. She appeared in a
California court yesterday. Her name's Jazz Vine Sanga, and they
say she could do up to six decades in prison
for admitting to a bevy of charges, including one count
of distributing ketamine resulting in death or serious bodily injury.
(06:48):
I kind of mixed feelings about this because on one hand,
she clearly gave him the drugs that killed him. But
then on the other hand, isn't elon MUCKs musk like
a known open ketamine user. What is the role now
on ketmine? It's socially acceptable. I don't know what the
rules are.
Speaker 3 (07:04):
Yeah, it's so weird.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
It's like it's got a dividing line between having medicinal
purposes and then killing people. Like that's pretty Yeah, it's
kind of a fine line.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
I don't know. I'm not very familiar with the drug side.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It's a cat tranquilizer and they cook it up and
they snort it. And that doesn't sound like a lot
of fun to me, but I'm told by a lot
of people that it is. Also. Do you ever notice
how people who smoke look really cool and smart and sexy.
I think I'm gonna take up smoking, Jesse.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
I am too.
Speaker 5 (07:32):
I think it sounds great, Kenny, I would love to
add to my sex appeal. And I didn't know it
was a cat tranquilizer, So I guess it's pretty popular
in the Vietnamese restaurant community, right.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
That would actually explain a lot. That would explain how
they got him. Hey, do you know this comedian Drew
Ski Do you know who he is? He's a white guy,
he's a black guy. He got he got dressed up
in white face, and he appeared at a NASCAR event.
They painted his face white and obviously if you did
the opposite of this, you would be Justin Trudeau, the
former Canadian Prime minister. But what are the rules that'd
(08:04):
you get offended when a black guy pretends to be
white or when a white guy pretends to be black.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
There's not a thing anybody can do or string words
together in comedy that can ever make me offended or
but hurt about what anybody does.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
I don't care. Just be funny. I don't give a damn.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
But as white trash, you know he's making fun of
your people, Jesse, he.
Speaker 5 (08:23):
Shouldn't I make fun of their people. My jokes are
rated E for everyone.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Kenny.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Okay, well, that's good to know, Jesse Payton. You're gonna
be at the Improv tonight with Nathaniel Amador and of
course you're hanging out with us for those that can't
make it October fifth, Bad Astronaut Brewing Company. Those shows
always sell out. There is a link at the top
of every one of our social media the Walton and
Johnson and Kenny Webster social media accounts, where people can
(08:49):
purchase tickets to that. And you've been doing this for years.
We've raised a ton of money for disabled military veterans,
American heroes. Obviously, it feels weird calling them disabled because
there's so much more than the but of course certainly
that's the reason we're having the event, right.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Absolutely, I look forward to it, Kenny.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
I do two hundred and fifty shows a year, and
this event is always one of my favorite. And I'm
proud to be performing with one of the guys who's
been a staple in it for the years tonight at
the Improva, Nathaniel Amador.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
So y'all can't make that one. Come out tonight and
let's have a good time.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
My brother quick break coming up next. Governor Jeff Landry
of Louisiana, don't go anywhere. It's never too early to
learn that the government is a greedy piglet that suckles
on a taxpayer's teat until they have sore, chapped nipples.
The Pursuit of Happiness Radio on Am nine point fifty
KPRC
Hey, if you enjoy the Walton Johnson Show like we do,
then you might also enjoy the Pursuit of Happiness show
in the afternoon with oh Kinny Webster there. And as
a matter of fact, I think, do we have a clip?
Can we play a clip?
Speaker 2 (00:16):
I don't understand these studies. I question I question the
accuracy of this. There's a new study out and they
found that prison guards have the higher highest rate of
life satisfaction. Do you believe that like guards in a
prison are happy people? I don't know. I mean, maybe
they get to hang out with their favorite rappers all day.
Who knows. I don't know. I do know this. Apparently
(00:40):
Pete Booty Jig is not really gay, I know, right,
could you that's shocking? Have you seen he looks gay?
He wears a bike helmet. Okay, let's be objective for
a minute. He pretends to ride a bike to work.
Do you remember that he was the transportation secretary and
he claimed every day he would ride his bicycle to work.
And then a journalist caught him taking his bike out
(01:01):
of the back of a van and walking it through
the parking lot of the Department of Transportation. Like all right,
you're busted, dude. So maybe he's not really gay. I
don't know. I wouldn't have thought so, but Tucker Carlson,
Tucker Carlson is opining that that's the case.
Speaker 3 (01:14):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
Peoput the fake gay guy. I have a friend who
thinks he's a fake game Mike. Gay producers always say
he's not gay. He was with a girl like twenty
minutes ago. He wants to be the Democratic nominee. It's
like time for a gay guy. He's playing the long game. Well,
it's suffering for your art.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
It's suffering for your art. That is hilarious, all right.
I don't know much about pretending to be gay. I
don't know that I ever had before. I once pretended
to like soccer for an hour while I was at
a game with some friends. Is that the same thing?
Probably not here with his opinion, weighing in on this
local stand up comedian and pretend gay enthusiast Jesse Payton,
(01:50):
I don't know how to introduce you for this segment.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Dude, that's perfect right there.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
I accidentally bought a Dak Prescott Dallas Cowboy Jersey, So
I think I pretended to be gay.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
For a time as well.
Speaker 2 (02:03):
That would explain a lot. Okay, that does that will
play well with our listeners in the Dallas far Worth
are Jesse, have you ever met a person before that
was pretending to be gay? Is that a thing? I mean,
as there was a time when gay guys would pretend
to be straight in Hollywood and we all know that
was must have been a long time ago. You could
be gay in entertainment, but pretending to be gay to
get into politics. Is Pete Booty Jag just ahead of
(02:26):
his time or as he as he miscalculated what Americans
really wanted.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
That's what manufactured depression, is that there they have to
find some kind of marginal marginalization to be accepted. Now
everybody we reward victim culture and you know, gay, I
don't know. But if you take you know, if you
take a man, Yeah, and you I think you're you're
a victim, at least in my experience.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Yeah, okay, so you in your experience, Jesse, what was
your experience?
Speaker 5 (02:56):
Well, I did do time in the Harris County jail, Kenny, So,
but not to talk about that for PTSD purposes.
Speaker 2 (03:03):
Ah, yes, okay, Well you know, on that note, PTSD
military veterans. We have an event coming up. For those
that don't know, we just posted the links. It is all.
We have a stand up comedy show happening on October
fifth at Bad Astronaut Brewing Company. This is Operation Comedy
Therapy twenty twenty five. You're coming back. Chad Prather is
going to be there, Kenny Webster, Steve Johnson, maybe a
(03:26):
guest or two, depending on whether or not. Jesse Payton
wants to ask one of his stand up comedy buddies
to come out and perform for free. Who knows, but
you're also playing tonight at the Houston improv with Nathaniel Amador.
He's been at Operation Comedy Therapy before, that's.
Speaker 5 (03:41):
Right, and the thing has been a key component in
Operation Comedy Therapy doing wheelchairs for warriors, and two times
he's gone with me inside Camp Hope to perform for
the veterans. The student has done so many altruistic things
for you know, for ex military members and now he's
headlining for the very first time ever at the huge
an Impropt tonight and I'll be hosting the show, so
(04:02):
it'll be tremendous show, great lineup and you know if
you want to support a good people who do good
things for you know, other good people, this will be
a great show to come to.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
That will be a great show to go check out.
I am looking at the news today and I noticed
that you often make fun of big fat lesbians. And
Donald Trump has just announced that he is giving serious
consideration to revoking Rosi o'donald's citizenship despite her being a
natural born US citizen. He's actually I don't know if
he's being serious or if he's trolling the media. Of course,
(04:31):
Allen Degener is she recently left America now Robin Wright
from House of Cards and what's that movie that she's
in Forrest Gump? All the short haired butch chicks from
Hollywood are leaving because of Donald Trump. Is Donald Trump
like the kryptonite to short haired Hollywood actresses?
Speaker 5 (04:47):
No, I think he's just making America great again. Like,
get him gone, I love it. Can we just catapult
him out of here?
Speaker 2 (04:54):
I think that'd be great. That was my idea. There's
some people that have decided that maybe using a cannon
to get the illegal immigrant side of the country is
a good way to go. I think that's inhumane. I
feel like a catapult and a big pile of pillows
on the Mexican side of the border. That would be
a little more humane, right, Yeah, but what kind.
Speaker 5 (05:11):
Of spring loaded catapult are you gonna have to get
Rosie O'Donnell's fat donkey butt across the border.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
I would imagine you could just coax her over the
border with food, of course, if she's already in Ireland.
Have you ever had Irish food before? What do they
even eat?
Speaker 3 (05:25):
I don't know. They might they might eat her, I.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
Don't know, dude. Hey, sad news today for the gay community,
speaking of I guess lesbians wouldn't care. Giorgio Armani died.
I don't even know he was still alive. It says
he's ninety one. The Italian fashion designer passed away. I
gotta think it was probably the COVID vaccine or who knows, dude,
I mean, what trendy or ragua. No, they haven't explained
(05:50):
the death yet, so you know it's probably coke or
probably you know, gay sex or something.
Speaker 3 (05:56):
Well.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
I'm not a fashionable dude, Kenny. In fact, I was
at a show one time wearing a button shirt and
the guy goes, hey, that's a nice shirt. Is that
BC beg And I didn't know what he meant, so
I just replied. I was like, no, this is ross.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
Okay, right, I think I've shopped there before. They have
some great deals. I don't you don't do drugs, do you, Jesse,
You're not a drug user, right.
Speaker 5 (06:18):
I've never even tried drugs, Skinny. I'm high on life
and hating liberals. That's my two favorite pastimes.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
There's this woman and they call her the ketamine Queen
of Hollywood. She just pleaded guilty to supplying the drugs
that killed friends actor Matthew Perry. She appeared in a
California court yesterday. Her name's Jazz Vine Sanga, and they
say she could do up to six decades in prison
for admitting to a bevy of charges, including one count
of distributing ketamine resulting in death or serious bodily injury.
(06:48):
I kind of mixed feelings about this because on one hand,
she clearly gave him the drugs that killed him. But
then on the other hand, isn't elon MUCKs musk like
a known open ketamine user. What is the role now
on ketmine? It's socially acceptable. I don't know what the
rules are.
Speaker 3 (07:04):
Yeah, it's so weird.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
It's like it's got a dividing line between having medicinal
purposes and then killing people. Like that's pretty Yeah, it's
kind of a fine line.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
I don't know. I'm not very familiar with the drug side.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It's a cat tranquilizer and they cook it up and
they snort it. And that doesn't sound like a lot
of fun to me, but I'm told by a lot
of people that it is. Also. Do you ever notice
how people who smoke look really cool and smart and sexy.
I think I'm gonna take up smoking, Jesse.
Speaker 3 (07:31):
I am too.
Speaker 5 (07:32):
I think it sounds great, Kenny, I would love to
add to my sex appeal. And I didn't know it
was a cat tranquilizer, So I guess it's pretty popular
in the Vietnamese restaurant community, right.
Speaker 2 (07:43):
That would actually explain a lot. That would explain how
they got him. Hey, do you know this comedian Drew
Ski Do you know who he is? He's a white guy,
he's a black guy. He got he got dressed up
in white face, and he appeared at a NASCAR event.
They painted his face white and obviously if you did
the opposite of this, you would be Justin Trudeau, the
former Canadian Prime minister. But what are the rules that'd
(08:04):
you get offended when a black guy pretends to be
white or when a white guy pretends to be black.
Speaker 5 (08:08):
There's not a thing anybody can do or string words
together in comedy that can ever make me offended or
but hurt about what anybody does.
Speaker 3 (08:16):
I don't care. Just be funny. I don't give a damn.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
But as white trash, you know he's making fun of
your people, Jesse, he.
Speaker 5 (08:23):
Shouldn't I make fun of their people. My jokes are
rated E for everyone.
Speaker 3 (08:28):
Kenny.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
Okay, well, that's good to know, Jesse Payton. You're gonna
be at the Improv tonight with Nathaniel Amador and of
course you're hanging out with us for those that can't
make it October fifth, Bad Astronaut Brewing Company. Those shows
always sell out. There is a link at the top
of every one of our social media the Walton and
Johnson and Kenny Webster social media accounts, where people can
(08:49):
purchase tickets to that. And you've been doing this for years.
We've raised a ton of money for disabled military veterans,
American heroes. Obviously, it feels weird calling them disabled because
there's so much more than the but of course certainly
that's the reason we're having the event, right.
Speaker 3 (09:04):
Absolutely, I look forward to it, Kenny.
Speaker 5 (09:06):
I do two hundred and fifty shows a year, and
this event is always one of my favorite. And I'm
proud to be performing with one of the guys who's
been a staple in it for the years tonight at
the Improva, Nathaniel Amador.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
So y'all can't make that one. Come out tonight and
let's have a good time.
Speaker 2 (09:19):
My brother quick break coming up next. Governor Jeff Landry
of Louisiana, don't go anywhere. It's never too early to
learn that the government is a greedy piglet that suckles
on a taxpayer's teat until they have sore, chapped nipples.
The Pursuit of Happiness Radio on Am nine point fifty
KPRC
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