What's the Purpose of a Bath Mat - FRI 9.2

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Oh boy, we got cat stories. What's going on? What's
that game? Well, you know, well, once you got a
gator at the grocery store in Florida, everybody's got their
own gator story. Joshua emailed us last name is that
is that a real name? Or did he miss did
he miss a letter? E O N G.

Speaker 2 (00:21):
I think it's Asian greed to disagree. It sounds average.
What do you think it is German? Anyway? He says,
we're at the canes. You familiar with canes right with
the good sauce?

Speaker 1 (00:35):
Oh yeah, with the chicken. Yeah, we were to the
canes in Gonza. Well, it may be it's gator. Sometimes
it gotzales. Just south of Baton Rouge, there by the canal,
there's a big old six foot gator hanging out in
the grass on the bank, right next to the parking lot,
probably sniffing at chicken out It called the sheriff. Some
deputy showed up, said animal control, said, this is his habitat,

(00:57):
this is his He was living there before you built
the canes. So as long as he isn't a newisome
a nuisance and doesn't bother anybody, not much. They're gonna
do about it. But since it was close to the
parking lot and it was kids running around, you know,
that's just that's that's teasing that gator. You gotta be
careful with the gator. Yeah, some people threw some chunks

(01:19):
of concrete at it to show it away. One rock
hit it on the tail and he took off back
to the water. So next time you're in fear of
a gator, a chunk rocks at it.

Speaker 3 (01:32):
Wow.

Speaker 1 (01:33):
Just like that. Sure, that's the great advice that. Yeah, well,
if it works, it works. I don't know. I think
that could work. Yeah, I'd be okay with that. You know,
I was noticing in the picture of the gator, good
chize gator. And you know there's Canes right there. There's
there's a Wendy's right across the street. I like Wendy.
You say I have that frosties. I like Canes too.

Speaker 3 (01:52):
What have you got the chicken fingers from Canes and
then you got a frosty from Wendy.

Speaker 1 (01:55):
That's what I'm saying. There you reading my mind? So, uh,
you could tip the chicken fingers in frosty. That'd be good.
What is that with people dipping into shakes and things.
French fries people like to dip their French fries into
like a vanilla shake.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
Oh, I'll explain it to you. It's because we're Americans
and we're all fat.

Speaker 1 (02:14):
Because we can do stuff like that and nobody gets
to tell us we can't.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
I was just reading this report about who has the
most sex, like genders and race and stuff like that,
and apparently black guys are having a lot of sex
according this report. Really yeah, but not as much as
the Hispanics are.

Speaker 1 (02:28):
Oh is that right? Is there a contails? I didn't
know what it was. It was a game. Oh, maybe
I'll stop.

Speaker 3 (02:34):
And then as far as sexes go and stuff, it
says gay man are having the most sex here, more
sex than anybody's having, and followed by straight people. And
then in last place is lesbians, which makes a lot
of sense because they're not having much sex. No, that's
what it says. Yeah, well, which makes a lot of
sense because you know, if you think about it, you
need a penis to have sex or exactly, Yeah, what
are they gonna do?

Speaker 1 (02:53):
You know, you can't do it. Hey, sometimes even if
there's a penis involved, it's not sex, right, Bill who's
Bill Clinton? Oh I didn't get the joke. Sorry, I
was a little young for that one. Yeah, all right,
everybody ever heard of Bill Clinton? God? I hate live music.
Hang on, there we go.

Speaker 3 (03:13):
Slash says we might be getting a new Guns N'
Roses album in the near future.

Speaker 1 (03:18):
Yay.

Speaker 3 (03:19):
We waited nine hundred and fifty four years for Chinese
democracy and it sucked. Now. Slash says, they may have
a ton of new material. It's a matter of having
the discipline to sit down and ething get into it.
He says, what do you think ef thing means?

Speaker 1 (03:32):
I don't know. There's no way to know. They skipped
a few letters. Slash says.

Speaker 3 (03:36):
The thing with guns is, in my experience, you can
never plan ahead. You can never sit down and go,
we're going to make it, take it this time, and
we're going to do this. Every time we've done that,
it falls apart. I know it's coming because everybody is
thinking about it. It just happens when it happens, uh huh,
which is as we all know.

Speaker 1 (03:54):
Probably.

Speaker 3 (03:54):
I'm gonna mean it's decades from now before we hear
Guns N' Roses album again. These guys are eighty when
they finish that. Oh god, yeah, so will I. People
won't even play musical instruments anymore. By the time it's done,
All music will be produced. Just by thinking about it.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
AI can produce a song, a quality song that'll get
played on the radio and people will enjoy it, and
it'll probably get a, you know, an award at some
point in the Grammys. And it takes AI somewhere between
seven and eight seconds to put that together. Yeah, you're
not kidding. Did you did you play a musical instrument

(04:32):
growing up? Mister Kenneth? Why do you ask?

Speaker 3 (04:34):
I'm just carrious Just to segue from that to the
next thing I want to talk about.

Speaker 1 (04:39):
I dabbled a bit with flutes. You were a flute
and piccolos and all the wind instruments. What kind of
flute did you like? Uh? There are There's so many
different kinds. Why it's hard to pick? Why can't out giggling? Weird?
Why is a kid?

Speaker 3 (04:57):
I played drums, but I wasn't allowed to play drums
during certain hours of the day because my parents hated it.
In fact, we had a lot of weird rules growing up,
and people online are sharing the rules their family had.
The weirdest rules they had, Like, one person said, no
turning on the lights during thunderstorms.

Speaker 1 (05:12):
Does that make sense to anybody? Well, maybe because they
wanted to see the lightning. You can't appreciate the lightning
if it's all bright, darker it is the better. I
get that.

Speaker 3 (05:22):
One person said they were not allowed to wear clothing
with faces on it, So no Mickey Mouse shirts, no
Kitty Cat shirts, nothing.

Speaker 1 (05:28):
What about a jacko lantern that's actually listed in here?
What about it? Jack It is a face? Yeah, it's
a face on a pumpkin.

Speaker 3 (05:34):
One person said we had to drink a huge glass
of milk every morning as a kid because my parents
believed it would make us grow tall. But I was
lactose and tolerant, so I would get diarrhea and puke.

Speaker 1 (05:45):
Fun but they still bade him do it. Huh yeah,
well I guess he wouldn't puking in the right place.
You puke all over your parents' bed, or you know,
you crap the bed with that diarrhea. Of chances are
they going to back you off of at milk.

Speaker 3 (05:59):
I know that's it sounds like child abuse, but maybe
they would do it for his own good.

Speaker 1 (06:04):
If you're allergic to milk. You're supposed to die, is
if possible? Stop that?

Speaker 3 (06:07):
This person said, we had a huge glass. Oh wait,
hang on, we had one drink cup by the kitchen sink.
If you were thirsty, you use that cup and you
put it back for other family members. Right, we'd wash
it in the dishwasher every day or two. Okay, here's
one that I love. No stepping on a bath mat
with wet feet. That's what the masks for, right, they

(06:27):
thought it was decorative.

Speaker 1 (06:29):
Huh okay.

Speaker 3 (06:30):
I feel like you should dry off before you get
on the bath mat, But then the bath MAT's there
to pick up like whatever little drip drops.

Speaker 1 (06:37):
Well, yeah, you don't have to dry your feet off
because the bath MAT's gonna do it for you.

Speaker 3 (06:41):
Yeah, but you shouldn't get on it if you're drenched,
because then you just have this wet thing on the floor.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
You's a notice in movie sometimes people will get out
of the shower and they will immediately slip their robe on.

Speaker 3 (06:52):
That doesn't make any sense, and they're soaking wet that
just ruins the robe. Do some people use a robe
to get drunk? I think they do.

Speaker 1 (07:00):
You know those my pillow robes are so plush though,
they would actually dry you and you'd still be in comfort.

Speaker 3 (07:07):
This person says the curtains had to be open first
thing in the morning so the neighbors wouldn't think we
slept in. Who cares what the neighbors think you're doing. No,
I hope my neighbors think I'm never home and then
they come over when I'm not there and try to
steal from me. So I could do like a home
alone style obstacle course of stunts and pranks where I
trick them into stepping on all my little micromachines.

Speaker 1 (07:30):
Yeah, and you could run some wiring from one of
the electrical outlets near the door up to the door handle, right,
so when they grab a hold of it like that,
and that'll teach them a list.

Speaker 3 (07:42):
My dad used to always say that since he pays taxes,
the cop was his property, so if I ever wanted
to use the CoP's gun, I was allowed to use it.
That makes perfect sense. Yeah, yeah, did you ever try that? No, Well,
it was a common thing in our house growing up.

Speaker 1 (07:56):
You gotta explain it to the police though, before you
make a move, move towards their good.

Speaker 3 (08:01):
All right, So that that did happen once in a while,
and I don't know why they got really upset about it.

Speaker 1 (08:07):
Back in the day.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
It was a real touchy subject for this one cope.
But then my dad actually wrote a song about it
that he owned the police. Yeah, he wrote a song
about how he owned the police. The police were his
property and if I ever wanted to use the cops, gone,
I could just walk up and take it.

Speaker 1 (08:23):
Did you ever record that song, because that'd be something
worth listening to. You see a cop, Just remember you
did it in text, so that cop is your property
and that inclus their gun. Pop, that's a gun in there,

(08:44):
rop be goss to share.

Speaker 2 (08:48):
If you paid Texas, then you pulled that God's down
to the half.

Speaker 1 (08:53):
So yeah, that was the song we used to sing
as a kid. I'd say go for it, man, I'll
say you walk out this door right here when the
show is over. First cop, you see you just grabbed
that gun.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
That's what my dad's had to go do it, kitty broo,
bro take a swing bro right here. Bro.

Speaker 1 (09:09):
Why you gotta disrespect bro? Do respect you bro? Some respect? Bro?
Do respect you bro. I disrespect you, respect you, bro.
I respect you too, Okay, Walton and Johnson Radio Network.

Speaker 4 (09:20):
Don't forget bully your girl. Don't forget bull you girl,
don't forget. Don't forget. Don't forget bully your girl. Don't
forget bully girls.

Speaker 1 (09:39):
Oh, let's go, Hey, ho, let's get hunch. Hey, let's
get some pizza. You want some pizza? Bro? I love pizza. Yeah.
I read a headlight about this pizza delivery thing screw up,
and I thought for sure somebody must shot somebody over
the wrong order. Here's what that's the world we live
in today. Here's pizza music. Hold on, you got pizza music? Yeah?

(10:00):
That boy, you are right? That is pizza music. That's
it right there. You could just taste the pineapple and chicken.
I can see the little Kianti bottles hanging from the ceiling,
and those red and white checked tablecloths up, isn't there great?
And don't forget the parmesan on every table. You gotta
have the parmesan in a bottle of ranch dressing, you

(10:20):
bet you? And wings for some reason. Good. So the
headline says pastor praise for pizza driver who delivered wrong order?
Was he cool? Didn't it sound like somebody must have
got shot or beat or something praise like praying to God.
Prayed to God over the rop No, this is this

(10:42):
is and I don't know how this managed to be
a news story, but it is pizza delivery gone wrong.
Pastor Neil Siwart of Castle Rock, Colorado placed the order
for Papa John's delivery. And there you know you're anxious.
When't Peacha's coming. Pecha's coming. And Susannah arrived with pizza

(11:02):
and at that moment that's when she realized, damn it,
I got the wrong order. She picked up order number
fifty seven, but then she grabbed order sixty seven. So
she's standing there at the front door when this dawn's
on her and they opened the door and she's like,
I gotta tell you, I feel really bad about this.

(11:23):
I screwed up. I'm sorry. Happened to be pastor's house there,
and he told her, he said, don't you for one
second feel bad. We love you and Jesus loves you,
and we hope you have a great night. But they
didn't leave it at that. That's when the pastor and
his wife and their three young daughters all came out
onto the front porch and placed hands on the woman's
shoulders and prayed for her as a group. When she

(11:46):
was explaining herself, I just I felt the love of
God for her, and I wanted to do anything I
could to relieve anything pressure anxiety she was feeling. He said,
he learned to trust his feelings of compassion for a stranger.
It's an opportunity to shine our light and help someone
experience the love of Christ. I didn't want her to experience.

(12:08):
Just our families love God love too. And the moving
moment was captured on their ring doorbell camera. Eventually somebody
put it on social media and boom viral over five
million views, and they said the prayer. He said, Jesus,
we thank you for Susannah, and Lord, thank you that
we crossed paths tonight. You know, even though they didn't

(12:31):
get their pizza. In fact, Lord, she's more important than
any of these pizza orders tonight, and she matters. And
that was really She's the life matter, Yeah, her life matters. Yeah.
And then for some reason they set up a GoFundMe
for her. Now nowhere in here did it say she
needed financial help. But I mean, she was delivering pizza,

(12:51):
so I guess that's kind of assumed, and they already
went way over their twenty five thousand dollars GoFundMe know
what they were looking for fundraising? Okay, yep, blue right
by that. So that's that. That is one hell of
a new story and it, boy, I gotta tell you
that really rocked the and nobody got shot, stabbed or

(13:15):
beaten over bringing the wrong pizza. Sometimes pizza delivery drivers,
you know, they can become victims really quick. It's really easy. Yeah,
she's just lucky she showed up at the preacher's house
instead of you know, like, can you imagine if she
delivered the wrong pizza or didn't deliver a pizza at

(13:36):
all to like JB. Pritzker, I mean, oh, he would
eat her.

Speaker 3 (13:41):
And then you're not even talking about the high number
of people that get sexually assaulted while they're delivering pizza's.

Speaker 1 (13:46):
Was that right? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (13:47):
I've been watching a lot of these movies where this
guy is delivering a pizza and he shows up at
the house and these two women come out.

Speaker 1 (13:53):
It was only two Usually it's two.

Speaker 3 (13:55):
Usually it's a mom and a step mom, Like why
is this step mom?

Speaker 1 (13:59):
And she's all, there's this one where it was a
bachelorette party. Yeah, I saw that tip, and they did
not treat that guy, uh like he you know, well,
they wouldn't even let him breathe.

Speaker 3 (14:11):
This one woman sat on his face really and like
right over his mouth too.

Speaker 1 (14:15):
I was like, how's he breathing? Is he okay? Check
his pulse? So he was the delivery guy, and yet
they wanted him to give them a tip. That is
not the way this world worked.

Speaker 3 (14:26):
I thought the same thing. I was like, leave that guy.
I won't quit objectifying him. That guy is not getting mess,
you know what I mean?

Speaker 1 (14:34):
This guy is not gett paid enough money to have
to put up with that.

Speaker 3 (14:37):
I bet his wife would be pissed if she knew
they were doing that all, don't you know?

Speaker 1 (14:41):
You know?

Speaker 3 (14:41):
And I just wonder and the like, especially in this
post pandemic world, all the germs and everything they were
putting on that guy.

Speaker 1 (14:48):
Poor guy. I sure hope he had his COVID booster boosters. Boosters.
You got to get six or eight, I don't know
number up to now. And infants need them the most
of all. Despite all the things we know now about
them and COVID and the National Health Institute and all
the rest. They're still telling you, you know, get your

(15:10):
newborn infant if you allow it to live after you know, delivery,
make sure it gets its COVID shot before you even
clear that that gunk that jelly out of its nose
and eyes. Now, that's if you choose to allow it
to live.

Speaker 3 (15:25):
Of course, remember in a bluestate, you can wait to
get that schmish morshen right up until the day before
it's born or just after, yeah, or just after.

Speaker 1 (15:33):
And you know what John used to always.

Speaker 4 (15:35):
Say, don't forget boys and girls to eat it every day.

Speaker 1 (15:41):
Hey again, you've reached the end of the Walton and
Johnson podcast. Good for you. That means you listened all
the way to the end. Does it mean we're going
away now never to be heard again? No, no, no,
there will be a new show tomorrow. Oh thank goodness,
unless it's the weekend or we're off work. But as always,
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(16:02):
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