Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Got to hand it to the liberal media for thinking
that they still matter.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
If you don't have it, they'll just take it.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
The legacy media today is parroting this talking point now
that Trump supporters are mad at Pete hag Seth, Will
Donald Trump fire him? I got news for you, guys.
Trump supporters are not mad at Pete Hagsat. I don't
know anyone that is.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Even a little bit on Twitter in real life. Where
are these people? So he got caught up in some
more of these signal chat allegations, which they've already tried
that once and it didn't so they brought something back again.
Trump has defended him. These little chat reports they don't
(00:38):
amount too much.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Really, it says, there's a report today from MPR exclusive
White House looking to replace Pete hag Sath.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
No, it's not true. The media lies to your face
every day, every hour of every day. They lie to
your face, and they they they wonder why they have
a lower rating than Congress.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
You mean, you don't think NPR, the organization that's been
threatened with defunding by the Trump administration, can be trusted
when reporting on the Trump administration.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
What.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
No, it makes no sense at all. You get what
I'm trying to say. Well, I just want I know
one thing about Pete Hegseith. It's not his birthday, all right?
Why we've gathered here this morning? Is it not? I
don't I know. I don't think I just came here
for the paycheck. It is machine Gun Kelly and Amber
Heard's birthday. No way, tell me, Zodie astrology isn't accurate.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
This is the first time I might actually think there's
something to it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
These two Tauruses, which is the zodiac sign that we're
in right now, for you know what? Twenty second? You
know what I like about Amber Heard? She's the Shinolas
she is, she really is. And the former missus Johnny Depp.
She's thirty nine, by the way, Absolutely I would I
could fix her. Machine Gun Kelly is thirty five, and
(01:56):
he ain't quite right either.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
No, he's nuts. Didn't he tat tattoo his entire body black?
How do black eyes feel about that?
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:03):
You know, most white people are trying to get darker.
You'll notice people go to tanning beds. White people lay
out in the sun all the time and just try
to get dark dog dark quick as they can. You know,
all the bodybuilders men and women go up with The
black bodybuilders generally look better under the spotlight with their muscles,
(02:23):
So the white bodybuilders all go get tann and cream
and they darken themselves up until they look like an
old pair of brown dress shoes.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
But you got him in a machine guns Kelly's case.
For those that haven't seen it.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
He do that it looks like he dipped his upper
body in black ink.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
People accuse him of trying to be black. They accuse
all white rappers of trying to be black. But this
guy actually went out and tattooed his entire upper body
to be black. He did, like it's just black, Like
there's no designer, right, there's just pure black.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
That stops about halfway down the torso there and it
turns into what looks like a newspaper print.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
A brick wall that says locals only, which is often
spray painted on the wall in certain parts of southern
California and your beaches to remind people that tourists aren't
welcome to serve here.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Okay, good news. Sherry Shepherd is having her birthday this morning.
She's fifty eight. Used to be on the view back
before the view just turned into just pure hate viewing.
She was actually kind of humorous. She also played Tracy
Morgan's wife on thirty Rock Cool. Cheryl Lee is also
fifty eight. She was on Twin Peaks. Let's see, I
(03:29):
don't know these people. Ryan Styles, so that's that tall,
lanky guy from whose line is it? Anyway? I remember
that that was a pretty funny show.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
But do you think they were actually improvising or do
you think they had a plan?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
A television doesn't do that sort of thing. Everything is
prescripted on television. Wasn't Wayne Brady on that show too? Yeah?
You think Wayne Brady lied to us?
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Oh? Now, Peter Frampton is seventy five years old. Now,
oh my god, I like makes me feel.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I like how he makes his guitar talk. I always
thought that was cool y like that, Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
John Waters, the filmmaker seventy nine. He's a proud gay man.
By the way. He makes pretty funny movies. He's from Baltimore, right.
Somebody ask him one time about being straight, and they said, well,
so is spaghetti and until you heat it up, that's
pretty funny. That's clever. He had a lot of clever
(04:24):
lines for a gay guy. Jack Nicholson who says you
can't handle the truth. He's eighty eight years old now
and he's a great golfer the age of the Pope.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Right up until he died. Apparently being the pope is
a more stressful job.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Than being Jack Nicholson does not ever look like he's
really stressed at all. Yeah, being a pro golfer, that's
not stressful. We're not doing that no longer with us.
Charlotte Ray, who was in the Fats of Life and
Different Strokes, Glenn Campbell born on the State nineteen thirty six.
Eddie Albert of Green Acres fame. Robert Oppenheimer, who created
(05:03):
the atomic bomb, was born on the State nineteen o four.
So that's that's your celebrities. You take a bag, you
take them bout them. There you have the facts of life,
the facts of life. Fact.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I was basically raised by this TV show. He's a
young kid. This was on a lot when I was
a kid.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
I don't know why. It was just the timing when
my mom would leave me alone with the TV.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Oh yeah, this was the only thing on. We didn't
have cable. So this is what I watched The Facts
of Life is on about the Facts of Life is
all about you TV.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Today's National Jellybean Day, and of course Earth Day. Yeah,
going for you.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
And then oh, hang on, it's also oh that's all
I had Earth Day and Jellybean Day.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Well, do you buy the Walton Johnson smartphone app the
we Got an app for you?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
That app is lit, It slaps, it bangs and other
cool adjectives that other generations say as well, and you
can download it in the Apple App Store or the
Google Play Store.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Doesn't cost a time.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
It allows you to listen to the Morning Show whenever
you want, or the Afternoon Show twenty four hours a day,
or live the pre recorded you pick. You could shop
in our store. You got to stop in the store. Yeah,
I like merch. Connect with us on social media. You
can send us messages. It never tracks your data. Your
messages to us are always anonymous. Unless you want us
to know who you are, you have to tell us
because we won't know otherwise we don't track you. And
(06:31):
the kids today they track each other on purpose.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
I mean, they'd like it. It's not like you're just,
you know, tracking them because you don't trust them or something. Right,
my daughter, you know Polyester, Oh yeah, speak her little girlfriends.
They all track each other's phones all the time. They
want to know just like they want other people to
know where they are. They want to know where other
people are. Just oh, I don't get that. It's a
(06:56):
generational thing.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I think some of these young women in their twenties
and thirties, maybe they're single, they're not married yet, and
they feel safer if each other knows where they are.
Did you know the snapchat app does that? In Snapchat,
you can have everyone know where you are all the time.
And why would you want to do that? Why would
I want people to know if I was buying up
a massage?
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Wand like, why would I want people to know that?
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Hey, if Polyester and your friends don't feel safe, they
can add me to that list of people.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Oh yeah, that'll do it. Yeah, that'll calm them right now.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Today, in seventeen ninety two, Washington declares America is neutral
in the war in Europe.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
This is such an American thing.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
George Washington made the point, we didn't come all the
way over here and start a new country so we
could get involved in your bs. Yeah, and I'm with him.
Bro screw Ukraine. Go ahead, give you crane a putin.
I don't care. I do not care. Today, in eighteen
seventy six, the first National League Baseball game was played. So, okay,
you're welcome if you like the White House Easter egg roll.
It all started today in eighteen seventy eight. That's how
(07:55):
long they've been doing it. Yeah, he was on a Tuesday.
Weird right today. In eighty nine, Oklahoma land Rush happened.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
What do they call them, the Sooner You gotta say Boomer,
Boomer Sooner. No say Boomer the Boomers. No, just say Boomer,
say Boomer. You know, if I had a hammer, I'd
try to knock some simps into the old boys here.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
You mean, like Paul Pelosi's boyfriend, Boomer Sooner.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Is that? I don't get it. You wouldn't Today.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
In nineteen forty five, Hitler admits maybe he shouldn't have
killed all those Jews.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Sorry about that late for take backs.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Yeah, and to this day he's still living in the
jungles of Argentina today. In nineteen fifty five, Congress orders
all US coins to have the word in God we
Trust printed on them.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
When did this happen? In the Middle.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
At the beginning of the Cold War, we decided to
start saying in God we trust. We also added it
to our pledge of allegiance around Let's hear it started
in eighteen sixty four? What says here? It started in
nineteen fifty five? Who do we believe? Probably which one
was written by a Catholic? That's the one I bow
today in nineteen fifty five. I wait, just did that?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Today?
Speaker 1 (08:58):
In nineteen seventy, a guy named Einhorn invents a new
holiday called earth Day.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
It's weird because of the guy. He mailed us about Earthday.
He said they celebrated at his school in nineteen sixty nine.
I saw that it wasn't invented until nineteen seventy. I
didn't want to correct him. Oh boy, I think he
meant a year tabs. No, I just had an edge. Sorry,
why did that? Grusz you out?
Speaker 1 (09:17):
I just didn't see the point to it. I just
kind of have to I forget sometimes I'm on the air.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Today's the day that Pat Tillman was killed by friendly fire.
And it's not real friendly but you know his own
side in Afghanistan. The NFL player I don't know if
you remember this, I do, from way back in the day, right,
you know, because of September eleventh, he went and enlisted,
gave up his NFL career to go fight for freedom
for you, And in two thousand and four, on this
(09:44):
date he got shot or blowed up or both. Three
reasons why that pisses me off. Number one friendly fire, right.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Number two, we pretty much wasted away all of our
money over there, and after nothing came of that.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Number three, he died. He did you know, the whole
it's just the whole thing sucks. Right.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
This was a guy that was trying to be a
good American, He was trying to be patriotic. He was
responding to nine to eleven. And the powers that be,
the forces and people in charge of our federal government
at the time, didn't really have anybody's best interest. They
certainly weren't trying to help the world they were, And
the guys, I would argue that the Afghanistan war veterans
got screwed even more than the Vietnam War veterans did.
(10:24):
And I think I don't think there's anyone that would
disagree that those guys got screwed.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Oh you know what, they did all right Today.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
In nineteen seventy eight, the Blues Brothers debuted on Saturday
Night Live.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
That's pretty good time, wouldn't it. Two years before that,
Barbara Walters who cares? Yeah? Today?
Speaker 1 (10:42):
In eighteen eight nine, one hundred thousand students gathered in
China's Tiananmen Square and Tampon Tim was there.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Actually he wasn't. He just told people that, yeah, that's true.
He lied about a lot of stuff. Wow, what a
douche Canoe thinks? That's three? Did you take a shot?
Speaker 4 (10:55):
One?
Speaker 2 (10:55):
People get to chummy with me. I like to call
them by the wrong name to let him know I
don't really care about them. This is the Waltman Johnson shown.
There's this funny guy on the internet.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
He's a gay guy, and I never I don't know
who he is anything about him except that he's funny
and he's gay. And he posts these videos called this
is why we lost, And he's posting videos that looks
like something we would have posted.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So he's obviously a liberal, but he's not real happy
with some of the things the liberals are doing.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
But he admits that liberals are cringey and that they're
doing things here's a video of him laughing at two
white women standing in the middle of a downtown area
in front of those crosswalks they painted with the Pride
Parade flag. Sure got the rainbow on the street. And
the white women there's not a black person in sight.
And the white women are singing a song called we
need to listen to Black Women.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Now there's no white women are doing it. There's no
black women around to listen to.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I don't think these two people know any Black women,
most likely not listen.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
How awful this is. This is why we lost Part two.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Black Women Daily the Way, Trust Black Women?
Speaker 2 (12:07):
The way?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Why women stop abandoning your sister.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Was then trust Black Women Day? The Way? Is that
a question question? I get it. Ye're terrible singers. They
have lyric sheets from that by them, says website where
he says this is why we lost part How many
parts are there?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
There could be hundreds. I only found two. I only
found part two and three. I couldn't even find part one.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Well, let's face it, there's a probably a non ending
supply across the country of things like that, and worse happening.
Here's him, that's probably why they lost Here's another great one.
This is a white woman in San Diego. She's very white.
But listen to how she describes yourself. She didn't describe
herself as white. She describes herself as this is why
we lost Part three, Miss Magic.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Maggie here from the House of Bliss in San Diego.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
So this is a public service announcement.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
I used to use tanning beds because I felt inadequate
because I'm a Native American with white skin due to
my Druid ancestors. But when I was in the tanning bed,
I surpribed my legs so that I would had wines,
and now I've got two moles on my whoo on
each side.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Ever, what not suggest using tanning beds? If you are
going to use the tanning bed. The one alcohol I
can is.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
The most knowledgeable mess Magic.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Stay blissful in the House of Bliss. Oh my god,
that's so I over use the word bliss to the
point where it's like everybody think I just didn't wake
up in a bad mood. I'm just a feeling of bliss.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Wouldn't it be funny if any other demographic did what
those chicks did in the first video, man listen.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
To that gaze may stop abandoning the homos.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
No, no, I'm gonna go ahead and abandon him. I
feel like they'll be fine there. Well, of course they
all right. So the ice Bucket Challenge is back and
it's really excited.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
For the same calls as last time. I don't think
it's for calls anymore. I think they're just doing it
because well they're on social media.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
And sports betting is back and it's bigger than ever,
what with the news this week has died.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
Where there's smoke, there's fire, and that fire is from
the world's first conclave.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Betting app Press. King of Kings. Pick the next Pope
you win? Could it be this old white guy? Come up?
This old white guy. This old white guy looks kind
of pope about the black guy? Sure? Or maybe any
one of the other old white guys.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
Play the draft King of King's Holy Trinity Parlay. Pick
the next Pope, his pope name, and whether or not
he'll be murdered by jd Vance.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Can you win?
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Sign up now, and with your first step we'll send
you an officially licensed draft King of King's pulpe Hats Draft.
King of Kings, the official betting up of the Vatican, bro.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
I am with that.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Has anyone checked on Kanye since yesterday? He made a
music video about how him and his cousin would have
gay sex when they were children.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
And yeah, that was unnecessary. I didn't really feel the
need for the song or for you to explain the
song to me.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Well, he claims he had an incestuous gay relationship with
his male cousin because they looked at porno his kids.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Yeah, its sonks called cousins by the way, and he
says he, you know, gave him the did something generous
with his mouth, gifted him something. Yeah. Nice.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
I gotta think, because doesn't Kanye produce porn for a
living now, I would think after admitting that that's what
you did as a kid, after looking at porn, maybe
that's a good argument to not make porn.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Maybe he's also a Nazi now too, right, So maybe
that's something that all Nazis have in common.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
He's a gay, black Nazi porn producer and that's just
And then Christian conservative, Maga Republican. Right over the weekend,
we were out on that comedy tour and we we
ran into an interesting person.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
There's so sad this young woman out there.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
She's a Christian, conservative, maga, patriotic.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
OnlyFans, model only fans.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
And I remember I was like, that last part seems
to be in contradiction with the rest of what you're
saying there.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
So right, you're Christian.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
She's like, yeah, conservative, Maga, Republican, yep, American values, good
old fashioned two genders, mon pop in the kitchen, love
and your family is.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
All hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet all that, and
you make porn. She's like, yeah, well yeah, it's you know,
woman's got to make a living. God bless America. And
they apparently they tell me all these people that claim
they're content creators, yeah, that mainly means they show their stuff.
I don't know if all of the Internet, all of them.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Due some of these people that are content creators are
just like doing makeup tutorials on the Internet.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
It's not for me.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
But you know, as a capitalist, I you know, I'm
okay with that that people make a live.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
You remember once upon a time they had o was it?
You guys make a living off the internet as well? Sure,
I mean not all of the money comes from the
radio station. Some of it comes from well, what apps
and podcasts and all that.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Oh yeah, our podcast gets downloaded hundreds of thousands of
times every day.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
But I was thinking about this earlier. You got these
purpose Yes on purpose, Billyead. It's not just people that
are curious won't see what this is and they're just
stumbled on it by accident.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Well, little of both, probably, but certainly on probably. You
remember there used to be QBC and the Home Shopping Network.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
I don't know if that still exists, But is that
really that different from what like twenty year olds are
doing now where they cell makeup?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And what was lam Hoff selling? Earlier in the show,
we played oil the armped hair oil lotion or oil
that she was rubbing on her hairy armpits.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Some people think I look greasy and gross and dirty,
but I'm not. I'm clean. I just rubbed this oil
on my armpits and you can too order it now
with promo code LA twenty. Sure it did look slippery, though,
didn't you dude? She looks so disgusting. That was not
I'm not sold on that. Who's going to watch that?
Imagine if that was anything else? Why people think I
smell like garbage? But I don't smell good. Order my colone.
(18:32):
Now use promo code Kenny twenty you get your Hey
it's working. I'm assuming that she's probably getting somebody on there.
There's enough people on the internet that and enough people
in the in the world that are all, you know,
weird and not normal like us, who will do things
that we didn't think they would do.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
Oh my god, I'm so glad you just brought that up,
because it's the perfect time for this. Hold tight, everybody
to the apiolypse. It's from this seven times the end
of the world. These are prophecies from the end of time. Yep.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
It's a sign of the apocalypse and it's proudly prought
to you by Heywood Harvest.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
The folks over in the in the Georgia area where
the Heywood Forest is. They go into the haywood forest
and the harvest things and then turn it into products
that we we like. Matter of fact, if the folks
are listening over at Heywood Harvest dot com, I'm ready
for them to go ahead and send my next standing order.
You know, there's the usual get it on over here.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Well, Billy, yeah, you just have to go to Heywood
Harvest dot com and use promo code w J.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
But I got this Mike W and j W Yeah,
I got this microphone right here. They can hear, well,
what about everybody listening? How are they so they should
go to the website? Yeah? Okay, Waldon Johnson, no, Heywood
Harvest dot com.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Heywood Harvest dot com. Okay, anyway, this appropriate time, because
who wants to be sober? If the world's about Tom
and it might be. I have a photo on the screen,
and I'd like you guys to meet the latest.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Bond villain, as you know, Quaus Schwab.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
But the World Economic Forum is out and he's the
guy who famously came up with the Great Reset during
the pandemic.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
That was his idea one al clause.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Shop is stepping down at the World Economic for him,
and we have this new guy that's taking over right now,
Peter brebec Let Mathey, the former CEO of Nesley.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Look at his eyes.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
One of his eyes looks like it exploded or something
like it's got like he's got a like a computer
chip in it.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
I don't know the hell's going on there. Oh that's
a lizard person for sure, trying to get comfortable in
his human skin. Cloak or cover up.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Not only does he look like a Bond villain, he
is a Bond villain name Bret bec letting mathe come on.
He last made headlines when he declared that access to
clean water was not a human right and that access
to tap water should be controlled by corporations. Mixed bag
of emotions on that anyway. Water is, of course, he said,
the most important raw material we have, and you shouldn't
be allowed to have any And what's with his eye?
(20:58):
I don't get that, what you know? Just curious? There
is that from the tap water?
Speaker 2 (21:02):
That's the lizard skin. Hadn't you know, accepted as human
skin cover up yet?
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Is it possible that this isn't a real guy? Is
it possible that because he really looks like.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
A Bond villain? I mean, the you know what? Just
it might also be possible that maybe this is the
guy that Marjorie Taylor Green was tweeting about because he
and the Pope died at pretty much the same time.
Wait didn't die. He is just stepping down, well, wait away.
And maybe she was talking about the fact that this
is a part of God winning getting rid of him.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Who knows, I don't know. What the answer is. But
it feels like we're replacing him with somebody worse. I
mean not we It's not like they asked me, Yeah,
you didn't get.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
The last thing I want to be when the end
of the world comes is sober. Walton and Johnson Radio Network,
Got to hand it to the liberal media for thinking
that they still matter.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
If you don't have it, they'll just take it.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
The legacy media today is parroting this talking point now
that Trump supporters are mad at Pete hag Seth, Will
Donald Trump fire him? I got news for you, guys.
Trump supporters are not mad at Pete Hagsat. I don't
know anyone that is.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Even a little bit on Twitter in real life. Where
are these people? So he got caught up in some
more of these signal chat allegations, which they've already tried
that once and it didn't so they brought something back again.
Trump has defended him. These little chat reports they don't
(00:38):
amount too much.
Speaker 1 (00:39):
Really, it says, there's a report today from MPR exclusive
White House looking to replace Pete hag Sath.
Speaker 2 (00:46):
No, it's not true. The media lies to your face
every day, every hour of every day. They lie to
your face, and they they they wonder why they have
a lower rating than Congress.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
You mean, you don't think NPR, the organization that's been
threatened with defunding by the Trump administration, can be trusted
when reporting on the Trump administration.
Speaker 3 (01:08):
What.
Speaker 2 (01:09):
No, it makes no sense at all. You get what
I'm trying to say. Well, I just want I know
one thing about Pete Hegseith. It's not his birthday, all right?
Why we've gathered here this morning? Is it not? I
don't I know. I don't think I just came here
for the paycheck. It is machine Gun Kelly and Amber
Heard's birthday. No way, tell me, Zodie astrology isn't accurate.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
This is the first time I might actually think there's
something to it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
These two Tauruses, which is the zodiac sign that we're
in right now, for you know what? Twenty second? You
know what I like about Amber Heard? She's the Shinolas
she is, she really is. And the former missus Johnny Depp.
She's thirty nine, by the way, Absolutely I would I
could fix her. Machine Gun Kelly is thirty five, and
(01:56):
he ain't quite right either.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
No, he's nuts. Didn't he tat tattoo his entire body black?
How do black eyes feel about that?
Speaker 3 (02:02):
Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:03):
You know, most white people are trying to get darker.
You'll notice people go to tanning beds. White people lay
out in the sun all the time and just try
to get dark dog dark quick as they can. You know,
all the bodybuilders men and women go up with The
black bodybuilders generally look better under the spotlight with their muscles,
(02:23):
So the white bodybuilders all go get tann and cream
and they darken themselves up until they look like an
old pair of brown dress shoes.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
But you got him in a machine guns Kelly's case.
For those that haven't seen it.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
He do that it looks like he dipped his upper
body in black ink.
Speaker 1 (02:38):
People accuse him of trying to be black. They accuse
all white rappers of trying to be black. But this
guy actually went out and tattooed his entire upper body
to be black. He did, like it's just black, Like
there's no designer, right, there's just pure black.
Speaker 2 (02:51):
That stops about halfway down the torso there and it
turns into what looks like a newspaper print.
Speaker 1 (02:57):
A brick wall that says locals only, which is often
spray painted on the wall in certain parts of southern
California and your beaches to remind people that tourists aren't
welcome to serve here.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Okay, good news. Sherry Shepherd is having her birthday this morning.
She's fifty eight. Used to be on the view back
before the view just turned into just pure hate viewing.
She was actually kind of humorous. She also played Tracy
Morgan's wife on thirty Rock Cool. Cheryl Lee is also
fifty eight. She was on Twin Peaks. Let's see, I
(03:29):
don't know these people. Ryan Styles, so that's that tall,
lanky guy from whose line is it? Anyway? I remember
that that was a pretty funny show.
Speaker 1 (03:38):
But do you think they were actually improvising or do
you think they had a plan?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
A television doesn't do that sort of thing. Everything is
prescripted on television. Wasn't Wayne Brady on that show too? Yeah?
You think Wayne Brady lied to us?
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yes?
Speaker 2 (03:52):
Oh? Now, Peter Frampton is seventy five years old. Now,
oh my god, I like makes me feel.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
I like how he makes his guitar talk. I always
thought that was cool y like that, Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2 (04:04):
John Waters, the filmmaker seventy nine. He's a proud gay man.
By the way. He makes pretty funny movies. He's from Baltimore, right.
Somebody ask him one time about being straight, and they said, well,
so is spaghetti and until you heat it up, that's
pretty funny. That's clever. He had a lot of clever
(04:24):
lines for a gay guy. Jack Nicholson who says you
can't handle the truth. He's eighty eight years old now
and he's a great golfer the age of the Pope.
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Right up until he died. Apparently being the pope is
a more stressful job.
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Than being Jack Nicholson does not ever look like he's
really stressed at all. Yeah, being a pro golfer, that's
not stressful. We're not doing that no longer with us.
Charlotte Ray, who was in the Fats of Life and
Different Strokes, Glenn Campbell born on the State nineteen thirty six.
Eddie Albert of Green Acres fame. Robert Oppenheimer, who created
(05:03):
the atomic bomb, was born on the State nineteen o four.
So that's that's your celebrities. You take a bag, you
take them bout them. There you have the facts of life,
the facts of life. Fact.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
I was basically raised by this TV show. He's a
young kid. This was on a lot when I was
a kid.
Speaker 2 (05:23):
I don't know why. It was just the timing when
my mom would leave me alone with the TV.
Speaker 1 (05:27):
Oh yeah, this was the only thing on. We didn't
have cable. So this is what I watched The Facts
of Life is on about the Facts of Life is
all about you TV.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Today's National Jellybean Day, and of course Earth Day. Yeah,
going for you.
Speaker 1 (05:47):
And then oh, hang on, it's also oh that's all
I had Earth Day and Jellybean Day.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Well, do you buy the Walton Johnson smartphone app the
we Got an app for you?
Speaker 1 (05:58):
That app is lit, It slaps, it bangs and other
cool adjectives that other generations say as well, and you
can download it in the Apple App Store or the
Google Play Store.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
Doesn't cost a time.
Speaker 1 (06:09):
It allows you to listen to the Morning Show whenever
you want, or the Afternoon Show twenty four hours a day,
or live the pre recorded you pick. You could shop
in our store. You got to stop in the store. Yeah,
I like merch. Connect with us on social media. You
can send us messages. It never tracks your data. Your
messages to us are always anonymous. Unless you want us
to know who you are, you have to tell us
because we won't know otherwise we don't track you. And
(06:31):
the kids today they track each other on purpose.
Speaker 2 (06:33):
I mean, they'd like it. It's not like you're just,
you know, tracking them because you don't trust them or something. Right,
my daughter, you know Polyester, Oh yeah, speak her little girlfriends.
They all track each other's phones all the time. They
want to know just like they want other people to
know where they are. They want to know where other
people are. Just oh, I don't get that. It's a
(06:56):
generational thing.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
I think some of these young women in their twenties
and thirties, maybe they're single, they're not married yet, and
they feel safer if each other knows where they are.
Did you know the snapchat app does that? In Snapchat,
you can have everyone know where you are all the time.
And why would you want to do that? Why would
I want people to know if I was buying up
a massage?
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Wand like, why would I want people to know that?
Speaker 1 (07:20):
Hey, if Polyester and your friends don't feel safe, they
can add me to that list of people.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Oh yeah, that'll do it. Yeah, that'll calm them right now.
Speaker 1 (07:28):
Today, in seventeen ninety two, Washington declares America is neutral
in the war in Europe.
Speaker 2 (07:32):
This is such an American thing.
Speaker 1 (07:34):
George Washington made the point, we didn't come all the
way over here and start a new country so we
could get involved in your bs. Yeah, and I'm with him.
Bro screw Ukraine. Go ahead, give you crane a putin.
I don't care. I do not care. Today, in eighteen
seventy six, the first National League Baseball game was played. So, okay,
you're welcome if you like the White House Easter egg roll.
It all started today in eighteen seventy eight. That's how
(07:55):
long they've been doing it. Yeah, he was on a Tuesday.
Weird right today. In eighty nine, Oklahoma land Rush happened.
Speaker 2 (08:02):
What do they call them, the Sooner You gotta say Boomer,
Boomer Sooner. No say Boomer the Boomers. No, just say Boomer,
say Boomer. You know, if I had a hammer, I'd
try to knock some simps into the old boys here.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
You mean, like Paul Pelosi's boyfriend, Boomer Sooner.
Speaker 2 (08:20):
Is that? I don't get it. You wouldn't Today.
Speaker 1 (08:22):
In nineteen forty five, Hitler admits maybe he shouldn't have
killed all those Jews.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Sorry about that late for take backs.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Yeah, and to this day he's still living in the
jungles of Argentina today. In nineteen fifty five, Congress orders
all US coins to have the word in God we
Trust printed on them.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
When did this happen? In the Middle.
Speaker 1 (08:40):
At the beginning of the Cold War, we decided to
start saying in God we trust. We also added it
to our pledge of allegiance around Let's hear it started
in eighteen sixty four? What says here? It started in
nineteen fifty five? Who do we believe? Probably which one
was written by a Catholic? That's the one I bow
today in nineteen fifty five. I wait, just did that?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
Today?
Speaker 1 (08:58):
In nineteen seventy, a guy named Einhorn invents a new
holiday called earth Day.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
It's weird because of the guy. He mailed us about Earthday.
He said they celebrated at his school in nineteen sixty nine.
I saw that it wasn't invented until nineteen seventy. I
didn't want to correct him. Oh boy, I think he
meant a year tabs. No, I just had an edge. Sorry,
why did that? Grusz you out?
Speaker 1 (09:17):
I just didn't see the point to it. I just
kind of have to I forget sometimes I'm on the air.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Today's the day that Pat Tillman was killed by friendly fire.
And it's not real friendly but you know his own
side in Afghanistan. The NFL player I don't know if
you remember this, I do, from way back in the day, right,
you know, because of September eleventh, he went and enlisted,
gave up his NFL career to go fight for freedom
for you, And in two thousand and four, on this
(09:44):
date he got shot or blowed up or both. Three
reasons why that pisses me off. Number one friendly fire, right.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Number two, we pretty much wasted away all of our
money over there, and after nothing came of that.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Number three, he died. He did you know, the whole
it's just the whole thing sucks. Right.
Speaker 1 (10:01):
This was a guy that was trying to be a
good American, He was trying to be patriotic. He was
responding to nine to eleven. And the powers that be,
the forces and people in charge of our federal government
at the time, didn't really have anybody's best interest. They
certainly weren't trying to help the world they were, And
the guys, I would argue that the Afghanistan war veterans
got screwed even more than the Vietnam War veterans did.
(10:24):
And I think I don't think there's anyone that would
disagree that those guys got screwed.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Oh you know what, they did all right Today.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
In nineteen seventy eight, the Blues Brothers debuted on Saturday
Night Live.
Speaker 2 (10:36):
That's pretty good time, wouldn't it. Two years before that,
Barbara Walters who cares? Yeah? Today?
Speaker 1 (10:42):
In eighteen eight nine, one hundred thousand students gathered in
China's Tiananmen Square and Tampon Tim was there.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
Actually he wasn't. He just told people that, yeah, that's true.
He lied about a lot of stuff. Wow, what a
douche Canoe thinks? That's three? Did you take a shot?
Speaker 4 (10:55):
One?
Speaker 2 (10:55):
People get to chummy with me. I like to call
them by the wrong name to let him know I
don't really care about them. This is the Waltman Johnson shown.
There's this funny guy on the internet.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
He's a gay guy, and I never I don't know
who he is anything about him except that he's funny
and he's gay. And he posts these videos called this
is why we lost, And he's posting videos that looks
like something we would have posted.
Speaker 2 (11:19):
So he's obviously a liberal, but he's not real happy
with some of the things the liberals are doing.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
But he admits that liberals are cringey and that they're
doing things here's a video of him laughing at two
white women standing in the middle of a downtown area
in front of those crosswalks they painted with the Pride
Parade flag. Sure got the rainbow on the street. And
the white women there's not a black person in sight.
And the white women are singing a song called we
need to listen to Black Women.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Now there's no white women are doing it. There's no
black women around to listen to.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I don't think these two people know any Black women,
most likely not listen.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
How awful this is. This is why we lost Part two.
Speaker 3 (12:00):
Black Women Daily the Way, Trust Black Women?
Speaker 2 (12:07):
The way?
Speaker 3 (12:09):
Why women stop abandoning your sister.
Speaker 2 (12:14):
Was then trust Black Women Day? The Way? Is that
a question question? I get it. Ye're terrible singers. They
have lyric sheets from that by them, says website where
he says this is why we lost part How many
parts are there?
Speaker 1 (12:34):
There could be hundreds. I only found two. I only
found part two and three. I couldn't even find part one.
Speaker 2 (12:39):
Well, let's face it, there's a probably a non ending
supply across the country of things like that, and worse happening.
Here's him, that's probably why they lost Here's another great one.
This is a white woman in San Diego. She's very white.
But listen to how she describes yourself. She didn't describe
herself as white. She describes herself as this is why
we lost Part three, Miss Magic.
Speaker 3 (13:01):
Maggie here from the House of Bliss in San Diego.
Speaker 2 (13:06):
So this is a public service announcement.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
I used to use tanning beds because I felt inadequate
because I'm a Native American with white skin due to
my Druid ancestors. But when I was in the tanning bed,
I surpribed my legs so that I would had wines,
and now I've got two moles on my whoo on
each side.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
Ever, what not suggest using tanning beds? If you are
going to use the tanning bed. The one alcohol I
can is.
Speaker 3 (13:36):
The most knowledgeable mess Magic.
Speaker 2 (13:41):
Stay blissful in the House of Bliss. Oh my god,
that's so I over use the word bliss to the
point where it's like everybody think I just didn't wake
up in a bad mood. I'm just a feeling of bliss.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
Wouldn't it be funny if any other demographic did what
those chicks did in the first video, man listen.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
To that gaze may stop abandoning the homos.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
No, no, I'm gonna go ahead and abandon him. I
feel like they'll be fine there. Well, of course they
all right. So the ice Bucket Challenge is back and
it's really excited.
Speaker 2 (14:18):
For the same calls as last time. I don't think
it's for calls anymore. I think they're just doing it
because well they're on social media.
Speaker 1 (14:27):
And sports betting is back and it's bigger than ever,
what with the news this week has died.
Speaker 4 (14:32):
Where there's smoke, there's fire, and that fire is from
the world's first conclave.
Speaker 2 (14:37):
Betting app Press. King of Kings. Pick the next Pope
you win? Could it be this old white guy? Come up?
This old white guy. This old white guy looks kind
of pope about the black guy? Sure? Or maybe any
one of the other old white guys.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
Play the draft King of King's Holy Trinity Parlay. Pick
the next Pope, his pope name, and whether or not
he'll be murdered by jd Vance.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Can you win?
Speaker 4 (15:01):
Sign up now, and with your first step we'll send
you an officially licensed draft King of King's pulpe Hats Draft.
King of Kings, the official betting up of the Vatican, bro.
Speaker 2 (15:11):
I am with that.
Speaker 1 (15:13):
Has anyone checked on Kanye since yesterday? He made a
music video about how him and his cousin would have
gay sex when they were children.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
And yeah, that was unnecessary. I didn't really feel the
need for the song or for you to explain the
song to me.
Speaker 1 (15:29):
Well, he claims he had an incestuous gay relationship with
his male cousin because they looked at porno his kids.
Speaker 2 (15:34):
Yeah, its sonks called cousins by the way, and he
says he, you know, gave him the did something generous
with his mouth, gifted him something. Yeah. Nice.
Speaker 1 (15:48):
I gotta think, because doesn't Kanye produce porn for a
living now, I would think after admitting that that's what
you did as a kid, after looking at porn, maybe
that's a good argument to not make porn.
Speaker 2 (15:58):
Maybe he's also a Nazi now too, right, So maybe
that's something that all Nazis have in common.
Speaker 1 (16:05):
He's a gay, black Nazi porn producer and that's just
And then Christian conservative, Maga Republican. Right over the weekend,
we were out on that comedy tour and we we
ran into an interesting person.
Speaker 2 (16:20):
There's so sad this young woman out there.
Speaker 1 (16:22):
She's a Christian, conservative, maga, patriotic.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
OnlyFans, model only fans.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
And I remember I was like, that last part seems
to be in contradiction with the rest of what you're
saying there.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
So right, you're Christian.
Speaker 1 (16:36):
She's like, yeah, conservative, Maga, Republican, yep, American values, good
old fashioned two genders, mon pop in the kitchen, love
and your family is.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
All hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet all that, and
you make porn. She's like, yeah, well yeah, it's you know,
woman's got to make a living. God bless America. And
they apparently they tell me all these people that claim
they're content creators, yeah, that mainly means they show their stuff.
I don't know if all of the Internet, all of them.
Speaker 1 (17:08):
Due some of these people that are content creators are
just like doing makeup tutorials on the Internet.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
It's not for me.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
But you know, as a capitalist, I you know, I'm
okay with that that people make a live.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
You remember once upon a time they had o was it?
You guys make a living off the internet as well? Sure,
I mean not all of the money comes from the
radio station. Some of it comes from well, what apps
and podcasts and all that.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Oh yeah, our podcast gets downloaded hundreds of thousands of
times every day.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
But I was thinking about this earlier. You got these
purpose Yes on purpose, Billyead. It's not just people that
are curious won't see what this is and they're just
stumbled on it by accident.
Speaker 1 (17:47):
Well, little of both, probably, but certainly on probably. You
remember there used to be QBC and the Home Shopping Network.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
I remember that.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
I don't know if that still exists, But is that
really that different from what like twenty year olds are
doing now where they cell makeup?
Speaker 2 (18:00):
And what was lam Hoff selling? Earlier in the show,
we played oil the armped hair oil lotion or oil
that she was rubbing on her hairy armpits.
Speaker 1 (18:10):
Some people think I look greasy and gross and dirty,
but I'm not. I'm clean. I just rubbed this oil
on my armpits and you can too order it now
with promo code LA twenty. Sure it did look slippery, though,
didn't you dude? She looks so disgusting. That was not
I'm not sold on that. Who's going to watch that?
Imagine if that was anything else? Why people think I
smell like garbage? But I don't smell good. Order my colone.
(18:32):
Now use promo code Kenny twenty you get your Hey
it's working. I'm assuming that she's probably getting somebody on there.
There's enough people on the internet that and enough people
in the in the world that are all, you know,
weird and not normal like us, who will do things
that we didn't think they would do.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
Oh my god, I'm so glad you just brought that up,
because it's the perfect time for this. Hold tight, everybody
to the apiolypse. It's from this seven times the end
of the world. These are prophecies from the end of time. Yep.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
It's a sign of the apocalypse and it's proudly prought
to you by Heywood Harvest.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
The folks over in the in the Georgia area where
the Heywood Forest is. They go into the haywood forest
and the harvest things and then turn it into products
that we we like. Matter of fact, if the folks
are listening over at Heywood Harvest dot com, I'm ready
for them to go ahead and send my next standing order.
You know, there's the usual get it on over here.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Well, Billy, yeah, you just have to go to Heywood
Harvest dot com and use promo code w J.
Speaker 2 (19:40):
But I got this Mike W and j W Yeah,
I got this microphone right here. They can hear, well,
what about everybody listening? How are they so they should
go to the website? Yeah? Okay, Waldon Johnson, no, Heywood
Harvest dot com.
Speaker 1 (19:52):
Heywood Harvest dot com. Okay, anyway, this appropriate time, because
who wants to be sober? If the world's about Tom
and it might be. I have a photo on the screen,
and I'd like you guys to meet the latest.
Speaker 2 (20:01):
Bond villain, as you know, Quaus Schwab.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
But the World Economic Forum is out and he's the
guy who famously came up with the Great Reset during
the pandemic.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
That was his idea one al clause.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Shop is stepping down at the World Economic for him,
and we have this new guy that's taking over right now,
Peter brebec Let Mathey, the former CEO of Nesley.
Speaker 2 (20:21):
Look at his eyes.
Speaker 1 (20:22):
One of his eyes looks like it exploded or something
like it's got like he's got a like a computer
chip in it.
Speaker 2 (20:28):
I don't know the hell's going on there. Oh that's
a lizard person for sure, trying to get comfortable in
his human skin. Cloak or cover up.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Not only does he look like a Bond villain, he
is a Bond villain name Bret bec letting mathe come on.
He last made headlines when he declared that access to
clean water was not a human right and that access
to tap water should be controlled by corporations. Mixed bag
of emotions on that anyway. Water is, of course, he said,
the most important raw material we have, and you shouldn't
be allowed to have any And what's with his eye?
(20:58):
I don't get that, what you know? Just curious? There
is that from the tap water?
Speaker 2 (21:02):
That's the lizard skin. Hadn't you know, accepted as human
skin cover up yet?
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Is it possible that this isn't a real guy? Is
it possible that because he really looks like.
Speaker 2 (21:12):
A Bond villain? I mean, the you know what? Just
it might also be possible that maybe this is the
guy that Marjorie Taylor Green was tweeting about because he
and the Pope died at pretty much the same time.
Wait didn't die. He is just stepping down, well, wait away.
And maybe she was talking about the fact that this
is a part of God winning getting rid of him.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
Who knows, I don't know. What the answer is. But
it feels like we're replacing him with somebody worse. I
mean not we It's not like they asked me, Yeah,
you didn't get.
Speaker 2 (21:42):
The last thing I want to be when the end
of the world comes is sober. Walton and Johnson Radio Network,
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