August 6, 2025 • 37 mins
Episode Highlights With Sheila
- Her personal journey with nervous system health and the energetic side of healing
- Kids resonate with the predominant adult in their household and how to improve this
- The difference between healing and curing and how the nervous system comes into play
- An amazing case study of one of her patients who had dramatic improvement
- Simple tips for supporting the nervous system and little habits that make a big difference
- How to support kids in nervous system regulation with simple habits
- How nervous system regulation relates to gut health and nutrient absorption
- Physical activity supports the nervous system, especially in kids
- Nervous system support tips for adults and what she does
- Kids feel what we feel, not what we say
- How to nurture more playfulness and belly laughing in your family
- Healthy Kids, Happy Moms: 7 Steps to Heal and Prevent Common Childhood Illnesses by Sheila Kilbane
- Sheila Kilbane - Website
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Well one for My Body's podcast.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
This podcast is brought to you by Hyah for children
and especially I loved to talk about their new greensline
for children. Now I have tasted these vitamins and they're delicious.
My kids are the ones who really love them, though,
and I love that they're getting the nutrients they need
without the sugar. Because most children's vitamins are basically candy
(00:26):
in disguise, with up to two teaspoons of sugar and
dyes and unhealthy chemicals or gummy additives that we don't
want our kids to have. So Haya created a superpowered
children's vitamin that's chewable without the sugar or the nasty additives,
and it tastes great. My little ones love it. They
especially are designed to fill the most common gaps in
modern children's diets to provide full body nourishment with a
(00:48):
taste kid's love. And it was formulated with the help
of pediatritions and nutritional experts and pressed with a blend
of twelve organic fruits and vegetables, then supercharged with fifteen
essential vitamins and minerals, including vitamin D, B, twelve C, zinc,
and folate, among others. It's also non GMO, vegan, dairy free,
allergy free, gelatine free, not free, and everything else you
(01:09):
can imagine. I love that they test every single batch
with third party testing for heavy metals and microbials in
a qualified GMP compliant lab using scientifically validated testing methods,
so you can be completely at ease knowing it safe
and nutritious. And it's designed for kids and sent straight
to your door so you don't have to worry about ordering.
(01:29):
My kids really like these, and I love that refills
show up on schedule with no stress. Also, again, honorable
mention to their new Greens because if you are tired
of battling your kids to eat more greens, Their Daily
Greens plus Superfoods is a chocolate flavored greens powder designed
specifically for kids, impact with fifty five plus whole food
ingredients to support kids' brains, their development, their digestion, and
(01:53):
kids actually like it. We've worked out a special deal
with Haya for the best selling children's vitamin received fifty
percent off your first order. To claim this deal, you
must go to high health dot com slash wellness Mama.
This deal is not available on their regular website. So again,
that's hi y a H E A l t h
dot com slash wellness Mama to get your kids the
(02:14):
full body nourishment they need. This podcast is brought to
you by Element and this is a company you might
have heard me talk about before, and I really love
their products because proper hydration leads to better sleep, it
sharpens focus, it improves energy, and so much more. But
hydration is not about just drinking water, because being optimately
(02:35):
hydrated a state called U hydration, is about optimizing your
body's fluid ratios. And this fluid balance depends on many factors,
including the intake and excretion of electrolytes, which many people
don't get. The right amounts of electrolytes are charged minerals
that conduct electricity to power your nervous system. I talk
a lot about nervous system on this podcast. They also
(02:55):
regulate hydration status by balancing fluids inside and outside of ourselves.
Element was created with the science backed electrolyte ratio of
one hundred milligrams of sodium, two hundred milligrams of potassium,
and sixty milligrams of magnesium with no sugar. Since electrolytes
are a key component of hydration. Here's what happens. When
we get our electrolytes dialed in. We have more steady energy,
(03:16):
improved cognitive function, suffer fewer headaches and muscle cramps. We
can perform better for longer and especially the support fasting
or low carb diet because when we stop eating carbs,
like during a fast, the absence of insulin allows the
kidneys to release sodium, So replacing that loss sodium with
electrolytes can help you feel good on the fast. Since
Element is zero sugar, it also doesn't break up fast.
(03:37):
Electrolytes are also important for maintaining blood pressure, regulating digestion,
and proper fluid balance, keeping skin hydrated, which is a
big one that I feel like often gets missed, and
so much more. I feel like proper electrolytes is a
missing piece for a lot of people. And I love
Elements new canned drinks which are sparkling water with all
the same ratios of minerals I just talked about, and
(03:58):
they are delicious. You can check it out and learn
more at drink Element dot com, slash wellness Mama, that's
d r I mk lmnt dot com, slash wellness Mama
and at that link you will receive a free sample
pack with any order. Hello and welcome to the Wellness
Mama Podcast. I'm Katie from Walnessmama dot com and I
(04:20):
am back today with doctor Sheila Kilbain to talk about
healing versus curing and paying attention to the nervous system
when it comes to health. We especially delve into her
personal journey with this how kids resonate with the predominant
adult in their household in a nervous system way, and
especially kids under seven, and how understanding that we can
curate and help our nervous systems and their nervous systems
(04:43):
to thrive within our house. She provides a lot of
practical takeaways in this episode, small and very inexpensive or
free habits that you can integrate that make a drastic
nervous system different. And Doctor Kilbane is a board certified
pediatrician with tremendous experience in this She runs an integrated
pediatric practice in Charlotte, North Carolina and wrote a book,
(05:04):
Healthy Kids, Happy Mom, The Seven Steps to Heal and
Prevent common childhood illnesses. And in this book she outlines
her exact method that she uses to improve or significantly
resolve altogether common recurrent childhood things like eczema, ear infections, asthma, allergies,
and GI issues and more. And like I said, this episode,
we go deep specifically on the nervous system side, and
(05:27):
she gives some really valuable action steps. So let's join
and learn from doctor Kilby Doctor Sheila, welcome back, Thank
you for being here again.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Thank you, it's always read to be with you.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Well, we got to have a great episode recently about
some very specific ways we can support our kids in
optimal health. And in this episode, I would love to
broaden the scope a little bit and talk about nervous
system health on a more macro level, and especially the
nuance between healing versus curing and how the nervous system
comes into play here. And to start, I would love
to hear your personal journey with this, what led you
(06:02):
to look into this side of things more? And I
know that there's gonna be a lot of interesting links
between parents and children, and we're going to get to
delve into both today.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Yeah, thank you. That's such a great question. And I
know you and I have spoken about this at conferences
and things, and when I first got into medicine right.
When I was just out of residency a couple of years,
I was pretty miserable, and I was stressed and running
from room to room. And I had always known I
wanted to do medicine. I wanted to do more of
(06:33):
a kind of a wellness right proactive model. I didn't
know exactly how to get there. And I think a
lot of your listeners may understand that same place is
you know that you need to change, you may not
know exactly what you need or how you can get there.
And so that was the place where I was, and
how that manifested for me was complete fatigue. I would
(06:56):
go home from work and I would be on the couch.
I could hardly get off the couch. So I started
seeing a really amazing, wonderful functional medicine doctor here in Charlotte.
He took tons of blood work and I was taking
supplements right morning, afternoon, evening, bedtime. But it was really
been about three to four weeks. That was not the
(07:17):
solution that got me back to the place where I
felt okay that then I could make some decisions. I
knew I couldn't make a decision from that depleted space.
So once I started feeling better. Then I realized, okay,
I need to quit my job. I need to you know,
start sorting through how can I start my own practice.
(07:39):
And so when I did that, it was one of
those things I did locum ten and I quit my job.
I took a month off, I did a triathlon actually
in Florida, and it then I worked where I would
could work for a couple of weeks, and then I
could block time, and I did a bunch of traveling.
And I had also prepared finetially, so I was able
(08:01):
to do it because I had been saving money. I knew,
I knew I was going to have to take a change.
So I was lucky in that regard. And then eventually,
you know, started up a clinic and I eventually started
my own practice in twenty twelve. But then part of
starting my own practice, I got back on that busy treadmill,
(08:24):
and so then I really had to get deeper into
making sure I continue doing my yoga practice and meditation
and cold plunging my nervous system out of balance. I
get anxious, right, it impacts my gi system, and so
doing cold plunging, which we know increases your doping levels significantly.
(08:48):
That was what I needed because I can also tend
to It's harder to pay attention for me if I'm
in that stress state. So doing all of those things
and meditation is again change here has been a game
changer for me. And the thing that changed I had
been to so many meditation workshops, but I took a
one on one. I did some one on one sessions
(09:10):
with a friend of mine who teaches it, and she
said to me, she you go to yoga religiously, right,
you have to treat meditation that same way. And that
was what I needed. Right. We take a shower for
our bodies, we work out for our bodies, but I
had to start doing that for my mind and my
emotional space.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Yeah, I've been on a journey with the meditation side
as well, and learning to schedule those kinds of things
first in my life, the things that increase capacity and
bring more resilience and joy and peace to life, because
that feels like it sort of exponentially increases capacity in
other areas versus trying to like squeeze energy out of
an already depleted nervous system. And I've heard you mentioned
(09:53):
before to tie in the kid aspect of this that
kids resonate with the predominant adult in the household. And
I've also read that, like, especially before age seven, kids
nervous systems are very entrained to the mother especially, and
that that's part of their nervous system development. But I
would love to hear more about how that works and
how seemingly this might be the link of as parents,
it's actually not at all selfish, but very selfless to
(10:16):
make sure we're taking care of our own nervous systems
because of how profoundly that impacts essentially the entire household.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Yeah. Absolutely, And the first thing I want to say,
I'm going to read a little bit of it or
go over a little bit of a case to give
it and use it as an example. But I want
to make sure that parents, especially moms, understand we are
not creating this in our kids. We're not causing it.
What we can do, though, is we can take the
(10:43):
situation and see how can we be a part of
improving it. I don't think parents need any more reason
to feel guilty about anything. So this particular case that
was a huge learning learning point for me is it
was a young boy. He was probably seven or eight
when he came to see me. He was a former PREMI.
(11:06):
He was a twenty nine week premie who was weighed
three pounds at birth. So he had asthma and he
had something called pfabas. It was a periodic fever app
this stomatitis pharyngitis cervical atonitis syndrome, which is a lot
just to say. He would get fevers about every four
to six weeks, and he would get really painful oral ulcers.
(11:27):
He had been to four different specialists. They've been dealing
this with this for a long time. He was missing
many many, a whole lot of school, and he was
on several many courses of antibiotics, steroids. And so when
the mom came in to see me, Mam was a
nurse and she said to me, as we were going
(11:49):
through the case. The first time she came in, she
came in without him so we could talk freely, and
she said he was one of a twin and she
said he's my sick one and the other one is
my healthy one. And I didn't say it at that visit,
but at the after I got to know her, I
started to talk to her about how can we sort
of shift the way that we're even thinking about him,
(12:11):
because we know that our thoughts, we even know research
shows that how the way that I am interacting with
the patient and the parents impacts the child's immune system.
So that's where, right, my first and foremost responsibility is
to keep my own nervous system balanced so that I
can just hold space for that family. And so then
(12:31):
I started teaching them we do all the right I
do all the science things quote unquote science things is
we do blood work, we do the medications. I don't stop,
right if we need steroids, if we need albul for
his asthma, we absolutely use that. But we start to
incorporate these other things that we talked about in our
previous podcast, Katie, as we talk about a good probiotic,
(12:55):
we use the digestivenzime omega, three fasts, magnesia right, well,
the things that we need to while we're working through
the nervous system things. So I taught the family how
to do. We did some auricular massage, just ear massages
that helped calm his system down and helped with the
pain of his ulcers. And I showed them how to do.
(13:17):
He was a kiddo who liked bear hugs and liked massages.
So Mom would start to notice when he would begin
to go up right when he was starting to get
excited or anxious, and she would give him a big
bear hug, and they were reaching. They were less and
less reaching for the tile and all for the ibuprofen.
(13:40):
He and a year after we started seeing them, we
also got a really wonderful occupational therapist involved. He had
a lot of sensory issues, so even though we loved school,
being in the classroom was triggering for his nervous system.
So we made changes in the classroom, changes at home,
(14:00):
and then parents started to really do a deeper dive
on their relationship, that great relationship. They were hysterical and
they called me the voodoo doctor, but they know they
were coming because they kept coming because he was improving.
And Dad traveled during the week, and so essentially mom
was a single parent with three boys and it was
(14:22):
just a lot. And so Dad shifted his work schedule
so that he was able to be home during the week,
and they started to recognize how their stress, how if
they decreased their stress, it could help the whole family system,
and we were eventually able to decrease asthma meds. A
(14:46):
year after we started seeing him, we actually were able
to stop some of his asthma medications. And we do
this in conjunction with a pulmonologist, right, who does pulmonary
function test. So I would never say just stop everything, right,
you want to work with your physician to do these things.
And this young boy ended up going he's in college
(15:09):
now and I think he's going to be a physician
assistant because it changed. It changed so much for him.
And mom is a nurse and she has started incorporating
Like she would message me every so often and say,
oh my gosh, I had this patient. You know, this
was going on, and I stopped and I did a
massage with them and I breathed with them, and it
(15:30):
was it shifted their whole system and way that they
were able to help him.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
That's so fascinating. And in your book, I know you
talk about the difference between healing and curing, and that's
even in it'll be in the title of this podcast,
and I feel like this is an important concept to
anchor in as we talk more about the nervous system
as well. But can you kind of define what you
mean by that difference and how this frames the way
that you approach medicine, because I know that you take
a really cutting edge, holistic view, while like you just said,
(16:00):
keeping into account all the things that we are needed
to support, especially a child, even within conventional medicine. But
it's a very complementary approach. But what is the difference
between healing and curing in your mind and when it
comes to the nervous system.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yes, So this little boy was a great example because
we saw huge improvements. We really decreased his as my medications.
He actually had a perfect attendance the following year at school.
He still was getting the oral ulcers though, so he
would still have these p FABA flare ups, but he
(16:35):
was so much better and they had a much bigger
tool box and a bigger resiliency again, so that they
weren't having to use some right talentol. Ibuprofen can be
totally fine when used in the right situation, but they
take great talentols cleared through the liver. Ibuprofen is clear
through the kidneys. It can be a little bit hard
on your GI track, so we only want to use
(16:57):
those if we absolutely need them. And it allowed this
family to see Okay, there's a much bigger realm that
we can look at. And another one of the stories
that they told me is that they were because mom
taught all of their family members and they were out
to eat at a big it was somebody's birthday, and
(17:21):
you know, the whole family was at a big table,
and that William was sitting next to his grandfather and
it was loud, there was a lot going on, and
his grandfather saw that he was starting to get agitated,
and his grandfather just reached around, pulled him in into
a big bear hug and started talking to him and
(17:41):
completely avoided the meltdown that would have ensued if they
hadn't understood this. So it's also recognizing not only the
capacity of kids, but also for us like I am
somebody I say no a lot to things because my
happy place is sitting in the backyard, being barefooted, walking
(18:05):
out in the woods. So when we realize that with ourselves,
we can also help parents understand that for kids, like
maybe going to an amusement park is fun, but maybe
it's only for two hours and birthday parties, right, kids
have birthday parties all the time. Maybe you only if
you have two in a Saturday. Maybe you can go
(18:26):
to both, but maybe you just go and stay for
thirty minutes at each one of them. And right, so
it's we have to be cognizant of what we're putting
in our eyes, our mouth, our ears, and then what
we're exposing our nervous systems to. Because that pair is sympathetic.
We want to exist more so in that parasympathetic state
(18:47):
than that sympathetic which is right, that fight or flight,
and it doesn't always mean everything's going to go away. Right,
We're not going to be able to cure every asthma.
You might have cancer, you might have you know, inflammatory
bald disease, and we're just we're going to use the
best of conventional and integrative medicine, but we're going to
(19:07):
work with the nervous system of the individual and of
the adults at home to make sure that we're optimizing
cellular health and digestion for the kids and for the parents.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yeah. I love that this seems like a very much
of both and am very complimentary that it's kind of
a whole family approach and the parents and the kids together.
And you mentioned you say no a lot. This is
something I was terrible at For a very long time,
I've had nervous system stuff and some past trauma where
I've only felt safe if everybody else was happy, So
I would overcaretake in a lot of realms. And I
slowly learned to build the skill of honoring my know
(19:42):
and in a very kind way, but honoring that no.
And I think there's a big piece for parents in
modeling this, because it's one thing to like support our
kids in it. It's another thing if we can give
them an example of it, which also gives them, you know,
subconscious permission to do these things as well. And so
I've made a point where with my kids, of my
non negotiables, I go out in the sunshine every morning
(20:03):
and drink and hydrate and put my feet on the ground,
and they can come join me, but I don't let
anything interrupt that. Or I'll take a break from work
in the middle of the day to go lay in
the sunshine, or to go for a walk in the sunshine,
or to meditate, or to do things that increase capacity.
And then I've noticed by doing that they are more
inclined to do that. And I'll find them on the
front porch sometimes in the morning, getting sunlight without me
(20:25):
prompting them. And it's because of that modeling aspect. I
would love to delve into any other practical things we
can do that really support nervous system regulation for both
parents and adults, that we can kind of integrate as
habits in our lives that will help increase that capacity.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah, and you named several of them that are super easy.
They're free getting outside barefoot and kids love this. And
we're you know, as long as it's safe right wherever
you are, but that we absorb millions of negative ions
from the earth. Right the best place is sandy a
(21:01):
wet beach, but grass, you know, dirt anywhere you know,
like painted pavement isn't going to do it. But I
will go to a track around near my office and
just because I can walk on the inside of the
track barefooted, it no matter what the weather is, I
will go out in the cold weather. So that's a
(21:21):
great way. And we had talked about in our previous
podcast about deep breathing. Extending the exhalation longer than the
inhalation is what activates the parasympathetic nervous system. So you
can use Andrew wil who's the guy with a big
white beard. He's the one who started the Integrative Medicine
fellowship training that I did, and he talks about a
(21:44):
four to seven egg breathing. Right, you in hell for
four seconds, you hold it for seven seconds, and then
you exhale slowly through your mouth for eight seconds. Do
that for two minutes and you can feel the whole
You can feel the whole room shift you'll activate when
you're activating that par synthetic nervous system. Also, Katie, right,
(22:06):
you know this. You get a shift of blood flow,
You get more blood flow to your frontal cortex, which
is where you make decisions. Right, our kids are going
to be able to do their homework focus better. And
you're also going to get a blood flow shift to
your gut, so you're going to digest your food better
and absorb your nutrients. And we've got that. We all
(22:29):
people have heard about the gut brain connection. When you
have one intel, right, if you've got your brain and
your nervous system in that relaxed state, you're going to
get better GI function and motility, absorption of your nutrients.
But the other thing I want to mention for our
(22:50):
nervous system is physical activity. Nothing we can do out
of a bottle or any or pay for is going
to recreate what ysical activity does for a nervous system. Right.
It releases endorphins, it increases our blood flow, and it
may you know, physical activity is going to increase the
sympathetic side, but then as we finish and recover, we're
(23:13):
going to have an activation of the perisympathetic side. And sweating, right,
is going to help us with detoxification. So watch a
kid on a daily basis, and that's what we need
to be doing.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
It's so true. When my kids were young, I had
one day where I decided I was going to try
to move exactly how my two year old moved for
the whole day, and by like two pm, I was
completely and utterly exhausted because they squat and crawl and
climb so much. And it was really illustrated that for
me of like their constant motion and they're built like that,
which is awesome. And again there's so many lessons we
(23:48):
can learn from our kids. This podcast is brought to
you by Hyah for children, and especially I love to
talk about their new Green Line for children. Now I
have tasted these vitamins and they're delicious. My kids are
the ones who really love them, though, and I love
(24:09):
that they're getting the nutrients they need without the sugar.
Because most children's vitamins are basically candy in disguise, with
up to two teaspoons of sugar and dyes and unhealthy
chemicals or gummy additives that we don't want our kids
to have. So Haya created a superpowered children's vitamin that'schewable
without the sugar or the nasty additives, and it tastes great.
My little ones love it. They especially are designed to
(24:31):
fill the most common gaps in modern children's diets to
provide full body nourishment with a taste kid's love. And
it was formulated with the help of pediatricians and nutritional
experts and pressed with a blend of twelve organic fruits
and vegetables, then supercharged with fifteen essential vitamins and minerals,
including vitamin D, B, twelve C, zinc, and folate, among others.
(24:52):
It's also no GMO, vegan, dairy free, allergy free, gelatine free,
nut free, and everything else you can imagine. I love
that they test every single batch with third party testing
for heavy metals and microbials in a qualified GMP compliant
lab using scientifically validated testing methods, so you can be
completely at ease knowing it safe and nutritious. And it's
(25:12):
designed for kids and sent straight to your door so
you don't have to worry about ordering. My kids really
like these and I love that refills show up on
schedule with no stress. Also again honorable mention to their
new Greens because if you are tired of battling your
kids to eat more greens, Their Daily Greens Plus Superfoods
is a chocolate flavored greens powder designed specifically for kids,
(25:34):
impact with fifty five plus whole food ingredients to support
kids' brains, their development, their digestion, and kids actually like it.
We've worked out a special deal with Haya for the
best selling children's vitamin received fifty percent off your first order.
To claim this deal, you must go to Hiya health
dot com slash wellness Mama. This deal is not available
on their regular website, so again that's hi y A
(25:58):
h E A l t H dot slash Wellness Mama
to get your kids the full body nourishment they need.
This podcast is brought to you by Element and this
is a company you might have heard me talk about before,
and I really love their products because proper hydration leads
to better sleep, it sharpens focus, it improves energy, and
so much more. But hydration is not about just drinking water,
(26:22):
because being optimally hydrated a state called U hydration, is
about optimizing your body's fluid ratios. And this fluid balance
depends on many factors, including the intake and excretion of electrolytes,
which many people don't get the right amounts of electrolytes
are charged minerals that conduct electricity to power your nervous system.
I talk a lot about nervous system on this podcast.
(26:43):
They also regulate hydration status by balancing fluids inside and
outside of ourselves. Element was created with the science backed
electrolyte ratio of one hundred milligrams of sodium, two hundred
milligrams of potassium, and sixty milligrams of magnesium with no sugar.
Since electrolytes are a key component of hydration. Here what
happens When we get our electrolytes dialed in. We have
(27:03):
more steady energy, improved cognitive function, suffer fewer headaches and
muscle cramps. We can perform better for longer, and especially
the support fasting or a low carb diet, because when
we stop eating carbs, like during fast, the absence of
insulin allows the kidneys to release sodium, So replacing that
loss sodium with electrolytes can help you feel good on
the fast. Since Element is zero sugar, it also doesn't
(27:24):
break up fast. Electrolytes are also important for maintaining blood pressure,
regulating digestion, and proper fluid balance, keeping skin hydrated, which
is a big one that I feel like often gets missed,
and so much more. I feel like proper electrolytes is
a missing piece for a lot of people. And I
love Elements new canned drinks which are sparkling water with
all the same ratios of minerals I just talked about,
(27:46):
and they are delicious. You can check it out and
learn more at drink Element dot com, slash Wellness Mama.
That's dri nk l mnt dot com slash Wellness Mama,
and at that link you will receive a free samp
pack with any order. Anytime there's talk of nervous system
regulation and nervous system health, I think about how easy
(28:09):
it is in modern society to become kind of detached
from under or integration into our nervous system, detach from
our bodies, and how we can run on programming that
was adopted or patterned when we were young, or programming
from others versus connecting deeply within ourselves. So I would
love any tips you have for helping break free from
that to sort of reconnecting with our bodies and our
(28:31):
nervous systems. And since it seems like kids are innately
very in tune with their nervous system, how we can
as parents support them in maintaining that connection.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yeah. So one of the things that I love and
was another big game changer if we're just starting with
the adults, is there's something called the five minute journal,
and it's when we also research shows that when we journal,
that supports the nervous system and you write down three
(29:01):
things you know, So I you know, I got the
five minute journal, and then I just do it on
my own now, so it's three things I'm grateful for,
three things that will make today great. And then you
do it at the you do it in the morning,
and you do it at the end of the day.
I am a night I'm a night oul. And instead
of fighting that. Now, I just I do my meditation
(29:22):
and I do my writing at night, and then when
I wake up right, I do my cold plunge and
I get outside. So it's more of a I kind
of get my mindset at night for the day. Right,
I'll write about we're going to have a great podcast,
and as the kids see you doing that, you give
them that maybe they have one word or they have
one thing, so that you were also getting ready for
(29:44):
the next day and thinking through and sending those intentions
to what's going to happen the next day. One of
my good friends, Kristin Oliver, she has written a wonderful book.
I think it's called The Connected Parent, but she talks
about it's feel what we feel, not what we say right,
And so that's where it's about embodying those things. And
(30:08):
just even touching your thumb to your finger is going
to help bring you into your body, and that's where
it's takes you back inside so that you're going to
be present where we are. And when you think about
just stop and take a breath during the day and
you realize how your brain may be a completely different space.
(30:32):
And I do a lot of hot yoga, so it's
sweating is detoxifying, but it's I could be, you know,
really riding high and once I get in there and
I get settled, it's right. It's a complete game changer.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
I love that. And I've also read your mentions of
wanting to see families belly laughing, and I would love
to talk about ways we can curate more joy and
playfulness into the healing process. This is another area I
think kids are naturally good at and that we can
learn from them about and that as adults we kind
of forget to stop playing. But what are some ways
we can bring that back into our lives and especially
(31:11):
in connection with our families, nurture that more.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Yes, so doing whatever it is you love to do,
and I whether it's maybe you're playing a game of cards,
maybe you're doing like there is a hysterical game where
you do oh, I can't think of the name of
it right now, but you make up different accents and
you have to you know, you go around the table
(31:35):
or you are the physical activity kind of things, whether
it's volleyball. I have becind one of these people on
the pickleball craze. And when you're playing those things, for
some people it might be just you know, again, I
want it. It doesn't have to be something that's super expensive,
but it's something where you forget about everything else and
(31:57):
you're just right there and encourage kids, like maybe you
have a thing where they have to bring a joke
to the dinner table every night, and having those times
one where you're fostering things that are going to make
you laugh because getting the kids used to it, anticipating
(32:18):
that laughing, and then also doing those games, the sports
that you're right with pickleball, we laugh so hard on
the court because there's always right, there's they're just something
is always happening. And when you're setting the stage for
that having having fun, it's just right because you can't
(32:40):
just say, all right, we're going to sit down and
have fun now. It's something that you want to keep
building and creating the atmosphere so that those are the thing,
the times that you're going to have it right, the
times that you're going to just be sitting and if
kids see parents laughing and joking and having fun, that's
(33:05):
always going to be the biggest thing that's going to
encourage the kids to do that.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Yeah, And I love how the theme of this conversation
goes back to largely free tools, that it's simply the
matter of making the habit around or integrating into our lives,
or understanding the importance of so that we schedule them
or prioritize them and not let them get pushed out
of our schedules. And some of the key takeaways I've
picked up from this or things like that, I joke
that I'm solar powered, but really, as humans, we kind
(33:32):
of are solar powered. And I say, like modern humans
kind of have nature deficit disorder, and to the degree
that we can reintegrate ourselves into nature, into natural light,
into walking outside and getting fresh air, like that's a
tremendous free tool that is at our fingertips at any time.
It also seems like a theme is small habits that
can make a big difference. These are not like two
(33:53):
hour a day practices. These are five minute things that
we can integrate that can really drastically shift the nervous system.
And as you've explained, when we support the nervous system,
we support literally everything I know. I was an example
of this, having been I was in for sure sympathetic
nervous system dominance for a decade and was trying all
the physical health things and had spreadsheets of supplements, and
(34:14):
it wasn't until I addressed the nervous system that all
of those things started working. And you also talked about
how nothing replaces activity and movement and how important that
is for us as humans. With so many practical takeaways,
I know you have tremendous resources available for people to
keep learning about this. But if people could only take
away one key insight from this conversation, what would do
(34:35):
you hope it would be or where would you encourage
them to start?
Speaker 1 (34:38):
Well, there's a psychologist psychotherapist. She's a Belgian psychotherapist, Eser
p Parrel, and she I love the quality of our
relationships determines the quality of our lives, right, And I
feel what I do in my day to day practice
is right. It's we're going to talk about nutrition, we're
(34:58):
going to talk about supplement, but the goal in all
of that is more belly laughs. And if we write
you can be sitting and meditating, which is great. We
want to do that because usually you're enhancing your relationships,
but if that also means cutting out certain relationships, keep
(35:21):
that in mind. And we just because we want to
foster these good relationships that enhance our lives and make
us feel better and kind of put away because it's
the It's almost like the Michelangelo, right. They said that,
like the Michelangelo, there was the rock and the David
was in there. He had to take away the rest
(35:43):
of it. So I think for a lot of us,
it's taking away what we don't need and the essence
has always been there, we just have to let it
come out.
Speaker 2 (35:54):
I love that. And where can people find you and
keep learning from you? And we're if parents want to
work with you directly with their children. Is that still possible?
Are you're taking new patients and how can they find
that information? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Absolutely so. Our website we have a brick and mortar
practice in Charlotte, North Carolina, and it's my website is
Shila Kilbaine dot com and there's a link you go
into the private practice and you can schedule a call
with our wonderful patiecare coordinator and she can kind of
talk you through what that process looks like. And I
(36:28):
have a book called Healthy Kids, Happy Moms, Seven Steps
to heal and Prevent common childhood illnesses. And we have
a lot of great resources online. We've got some great
downloads that you can you can download for free and
kind of look at the process of what we use
in our practice.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Awesome. Well. I will put all of those links in
the show notes for any of you listening on the go.
Those will all be a Onnessmama dot com. Doctor Sheila,
you are a wealth of information and an absolute joy.
So fun to talk to and I'm always grateful for
our conversations and especially for your time. I know that
you help so many people and you have many requests
for your time. I'm honored that you chose to spend
it with me today. Thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Oh Katie, thank you. You do incredible work and I
so appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
And thank you as always for sharing your most valuable resources,
your time, your energy, and your attention with us today.
We're both so grateful that you did and I hope
that you will join me again on the next episode
of the Wellness Moama podcast. If you're enjoying these interviews,
would you please take two minutes to leave a rating
or review on iTunes for me. Doing this helps more
(37:36):
people to find the podcast, which means even more moms
and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate
your time and thanks as always for listening.
Well one for My Body's podcast.
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Electrolytes are also important for maintaining blood pressure, regulating digestion,
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(04:20):
am back today with doctor Sheila Kilbain to talk about
healing versus curing and paying attention to the nervous system
when it comes to health. We especially delve into her
personal journey with this how kids resonate with the predominant
adult in their household in a nervous system way, and
especially kids under seven, and how understanding that we can
curate and help our nervous systems and their nervous systems
(04:43):
to thrive within our house. She provides a lot of
practical takeaways in this episode, small and very inexpensive or
free habits that you can integrate that make a drastic
nervous system different. And Doctor Kilbane is a board certified
pediatrician with tremendous experience in this She runs an integrated
pediatric practice in Charlotte, North Carolina and wrote a book,
(05:04):
Healthy Kids, Happy Mom, The Seven Steps to Heal and
Prevent common childhood illnesses. And in this book she outlines
her exact method that she uses to improve or significantly
resolve altogether common recurrent childhood things like eczema, ear infections, asthma, allergies,
and GI issues and more. And like I said, this episode,
we go deep specifically on the nervous system side, and
(05:27):
she gives some really valuable action steps. So let's join
and learn from doctor Kilby Doctor Sheila, welcome back, Thank
you for being here again.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Thank you, it's always read to be with you.
Speaker 2 (05:39):
Well, we got to have a great episode recently about
some very specific ways we can support our kids in
optimal health. And in this episode, I would love to
broaden the scope a little bit and talk about nervous
system health on a more macro level, and especially the
nuance between healing versus curing and how the nervous system
comes into play here. And to start, I would love
to hear your personal journey with this, what led you
(06:02):
to look into this side of things more? And I
know that there's gonna be a lot of interesting links
between parents and children, and we're going to get to
delve into both today.
Speaker 1 (06:11):
Yeah, thank you. That's such a great question. And I
know you and I have spoken about this at conferences
and things, and when I first got into medicine right.
When I was just out of residency a couple of years,
I was pretty miserable, and I was stressed and running
from room to room. And I had always known I
wanted to do medicine. I wanted to do more of
(06:33):
a kind of a wellness right proactive model. I didn't
know exactly how to get there. And I think a
lot of your listeners may understand that same place is
you know that you need to change, you may not
know exactly what you need or how you can get there.
And so that was the place where I was, and
how that manifested for me was complete fatigue. I would
(06:56):
go home from work and I would be on the couch.
I could hardly get off the couch. So I started
seeing a really amazing, wonderful functional medicine doctor here in Charlotte.
He took tons of blood work and I was taking
supplements right morning, afternoon, evening, bedtime. But it was really
been about three to four weeks. That was not the
(07:17):
solution that got me back to the place where I
felt okay that then I could make some decisions. I
knew I couldn't make a decision from that depleted space.
So once I started feeling better. Then I realized, okay,
I need to quit my job. I need to you know,
start sorting through how can I start my own practice.
(07:39):
And so when I did that, it was one of
those things I did locum ten and I quit my job.
I took a month off, I did a triathlon actually
in Florida, and it then I worked where I would
could work for a couple of weeks, and then I
could block time, and I did a bunch of traveling.
And I had also prepared finetially, so I was able
(08:01):
to do it because I had been saving money. I knew,
I knew I was going to have to take a change.
So I was lucky in that regard. And then eventually,
you know, started up a clinic and I eventually started
my own practice in twenty twelve. But then part of
starting my own practice, I got back on that busy treadmill,
(08:24):
and so then I really had to get deeper into
making sure I continue doing my yoga practice and meditation
and cold plunging my nervous system out of balance. I
get anxious, right, it impacts my gi system, and so
doing cold plunging, which we know increases your doping levels significantly.
(08:48):
That was what I needed because I can also tend
to It's harder to pay attention for me if I'm
in that stress state. So doing all of those things
and meditation is again change here has been a game
changer for me. And the thing that changed I had
been to so many meditation workshops, but I took a
one on one. I did some one on one sessions
(09:10):
with a friend of mine who teaches it, and she
said to me, she you go to yoga religiously, right,
you have to treat meditation that same way. And that
was what I needed. Right. We take a shower for
our bodies, we work out for our bodies, but I
had to start doing that for my mind and my
emotional space.
Speaker 2 (09:31):
Yeah, I've been on a journey with the meditation side
as well, and learning to schedule those kinds of things
first in my life, the things that increase capacity and
bring more resilience and joy and peace to life, because
that feels like it sort of exponentially increases capacity in
other areas versus trying to like squeeze energy out of
an already depleted nervous system. And I've heard you mentioned
(09:53):
before to tie in the kid aspect of this that
kids resonate with the predominant adult in the household. And
I've also read that, like, especially before age seven, kids
nervous systems are very entrained to the mother especially, and
that that's part of their nervous system development. But I
would love to hear more about how that works and
how seemingly this might be the link of as parents,
it's actually not at all selfish, but very selfless to
(10:16):
make sure we're taking care of our own nervous systems
because of how profoundly that impacts essentially the entire household.
Speaker 1 (10:22):
Yeah. Absolutely, And the first thing I want to say,
I'm going to read a little bit of it or
go over a little bit of a case to give
it and use it as an example. But I want
to make sure that parents, especially moms, understand we are
not creating this in our kids. We're not causing it.
What we can do, though, is we can take the
(10:43):
situation and see how can we be a part of
improving it. I don't think parents need any more reason
to feel guilty about anything. So this particular case that
was a huge learning learning point for me is it
was a young boy. He was probably seven or eight
when he came to see me. He was a former PREMI.
(11:06):
He was a twenty nine week premie who was weighed
three pounds at birth. So he had asthma and he
had something called pfabas. It was a periodic fever app
this stomatitis pharyngitis cervical atonitis syndrome, which is a lot
just to say. He would get fevers about every four
to six weeks, and he would get really painful oral ulcers.
(11:27):
He had been to four different specialists. They've been dealing
this with this for a long time. He was missing
many many, a whole lot of school, and he was
on several many courses of antibiotics, steroids. And so when
the mom came in to see me, Mam was a
nurse and she said to me, as we were going
(11:49):
through the case. The first time she came in, she
came in without him so we could talk freely, and
she said he was one of a twin and she
said he's my sick one and the other one is
my healthy one. And I didn't say it at that visit,
but at the after I got to know her, I
started to talk to her about how can we sort
of shift the way that we're even thinking about him,
(12:11):
because we know that our thoughts, we even know research
shows that how the way that I am interacting with
the patient and the parents impacts the child's immune system.
So that's where, right, my first and foremost responsibility is
to keep my own nervous system balanced so that I
can just hold space for that family. And so then
(12:31):
I started teaching them we do all the right I
do all the science things quote unquote science things is
we do blood work, we do the medications. I don't stop,
right if we need steroids, if we need albul for
his asthma, we absolutely use that. But we start to
incorporate these other things that we talked about in our
previous podcast, Katie, as we talk about a good probiotic,
(12:55):
we use the digestivenzime omega, three fasts, magnesia right, well,
the things that we need to while we're working through
the nervous system things. So I taught the family how
to do. We did some auricular massage, just ear massages
that helped calm his system down and helped with the
pain of his ulcers. And I showed them how to do.
(13:17):
He was a kiddo who liked bear hugs and liked massages.
So Mom would start to notice when he would begin
to go up right when he was starting to get
excited or anxious, and she would give him a big
bear hug, and they were reaching. They were less and
less reaching for the tile and all for the ibuprofen.
(13:40):
He and a year after we started seeing them, we
also got a really wonderful occupational therapist involved. He had
a lot of sensory issues, so even though we loved school,
being in the classroom was triggering for his nervous system.
So we made changes in the classroom, changes at home,
(14:00):
and then parents started to really do a deeper dive
on their relationship, that great relationship. They were hysterical and
they called me the voodoo doctor, but they know they
were coming because they kept coming because he was improving.
And Dad traveled during the week, and so essentially mom
was a single parent with three boys and it was
(14:22):
just a lot. And so Dad shifted his work schedule
so that he was able to be home during the week,
and they started to recognize how their stress, how if
they decreased their stress, it could help the whole family system,
and we were eventually able to decrease asthma meds. A
(14:46):
year after we started seeing him, we actually were able
to stop some of his asthma medications. And we do
this in conjunction with a pulmonologist, right, who does pulmonary
function test. So I would never say just stop everything, right,
you want to work with your physician to do these things.
And this young boy ended up going he's in college
(15:09):
now and I think he's going to be a physician
assistant because it changed. It changed so much for him.
And mom is a nurse and she has started incorporating
Like she would message me every so often and say,
oh my gosh, I had this patient. You know, this
was going on, and I stopped and I did a
massage with them and I breathed with them, and it
(15:30):
was it shifted their whole system and way that they
were able to help him.
Speaker 2 (15:37):
That's so fascinating. And in your book, I know you
talk about the difference between healing and curing, and that's
even in it'll be in the title of this podcast,
and I feel like this is an important concept to
anchor in as we talk more about the nervous system
as well. But can you kind of define what you
mean by that difference and how this frames the way
that you approach medicine, because I know that you take
a really cutting edge, holistic view, while like you just said,
(16:00):
keeping into account all the things that we are needed
to support, especially a child, even within conventional medicine. But
it's a very complementary approach. But what is the difference
between healing and curing in your mind and when it
comes to the nervous system.
Speaker 1 (16:13):
Yes, So this little boy was a great example because
we saw huge improvements. We really decreased his as my medications.
He actually had a perfect attendance the following year at school.
He still was getting the oral ulcers though, so he
would still have these p FABA flare ups, but he
(16:35):
was so much better and they had a much bigger
tool box and a bigger resiliency again, so that they
weren't having to use some right talentol. Ibuprofen can be
totally fine when used in the right situation, but they
take great talentols cleared through the liver. Ibuprofen is clear
through the kidneys. It can be a little bit hard
on your GI track, so we only want to use
(16:57):
those if we absolutely need them. And it allowed this
family to see Okay, there's a much bigger realm that
we can look at. And another one of the stories
that they told me is that they were because mom
taught all of their family members and they were out
to eat at a big it was somebody's birthday, and
(17:21):
you know, the whole family was at a big table,
and that William was sitting next to his grandfather and
it was loud, there was a lot going on, and
his grandfather saw that he was starting to get agitated,
and his grandfather just reached around, pulled him in into
a big bear hug and started talking to him and
(17:41):
completely avoided the meltdown that would have ensued if they
hadn't understood this. So it's also recognizing not only the
capacity of kids, but also for us like I am
somebody I say no a lot to things because my
happy place is sitting in the backyard, being barefooted, walking
(18:05):
out in the woods. So when we realize that with ourselves,
we can also help parents understand that for kids, like
maybe going to an amusement park is fun, but maybe
it's only for two hours and birthday parties, right, kids
have birthday parties all the time. Maybe you only if
you have two in a Saturday. Maybe you can go
(18:26):
to both, but maybe you just go and stay for
thirty minutes at each one of them. And right, so
it's we have to be cognizant of what we're putting
in our eyes, our mouth, our ears, and then what
we're exposing our nervous systems to. Because that pair is sympathetic.
We want to exist more so in that parasympathetic state
(18:47):
than that sympathetic which is right, that fight or flight,
and it doesn't always mean everything's going to go away. Right,
We're not going to be able to cure every asthma.
You might have cancer, you might have you know, inflammatory
bald disease, and we're just we're going to use the
best of conventional and integrative medicine, but we're going to
(19:07):
work with the nervous system of the individual and of
the adults at home to make sure that we're optimizing
cellular health and digestion for the kids and for the parents.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
Yeah. I love that this seems like a very much
of both and am very complimentary that it's kind of
a whole family approach and the parents and the kids together.
And you mentioned you say no a lot. This is
something I was terrible at For a very long time,
I've had nervous system stuff and some past trauma where
I've only felt safe if everybody else was happy, So
I would overcaretake in a lot of realms. And I
slowly learned to build the skill of honoring my know
(19:42):
and in a very kind way, but honoring that no.
And I think there's a big piece for parents in
modeling this, because it's one thing to like support our
kids in it. It's another thing if we can give
them an example of it, which also gives them, you know,
subconscious permission to do these things as well. And so
I've made a point where with my kids, of my
non negotiables, I go out in the sunshine every morning
(20:03):
and drink and hydrate and put my feet on the ground,
and they can come join me, but I don't let
anything interrupt that. Or I'll take a break from work
in the middle of the day to go lay in
the sunshine, or to go for a walk in the sunshine,
or to meditate, or to do things that increase capacity.
And then I've noticed by doing that they are more
inclined to do that. And I'll find them on the
front porch sometimes in the morning, getting sunlight without me
(20:25):
prompting them. And it's because of that modeling aspect. I
would love to delve into any other practical things we
can do that really support nervous system regulation for both
parents and adults, that we can kind of integrate as
habits in our lives that will help increase that capacity.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Yeah, and you named several of them that are super easy.
They're free getting outside barefoot and kids love this. And
we're you know, as long as it's safe right wherever
you are, but that we absorb millions of negative ions
from the earth. Right the best place is sandy a
(21:01):
wet beach, but grass, you know, dirt anywhere you know,
like painted pavement isn't going to do it. But I
will go to a track around near my office and
just because I can walk on the inside of the
track barefooted, it no matter what the weather is, I
will go out in the cold weather. So that's a
(21:21):
great way. And we had talked about in our previous
podcast about deep breathing. Extending the exhalation longer than the
inhalation is what activates the parasympathetic nervous system. So you
can use Andrew wil who's the guy with a big
white beard. He's the one who started the Integrative Medicine
fellowship training that I did, and he talks about a
(21:44):
four to seven egg breathing. Right, you in hell for
four seconds, you hold it for seven seconds, and then
you exhale slowly through your mouth for eight seconds. Do
that for two minutes and you can feel the whole
You can feel the whole room shift you'll activate when
you're activating that par synthetic nervous system. Also, Katie, right,
(22:06):
you know this. You get a shift of blood flow,
You get more blood flow to your frontal cortex, which
is where you make decisions. Right, our kids are going
to be able to do their homework focus better. And
you're also going to get a blood flow shift to
your gut, so you're going to digest your food better
and absorb your nutrients. And we've got that. We all
(22:29):
people have heard about the gut brain connection. When you
have one intel, right, if you've got your brain and
your nervous system in that relaxed state, you're going to
get better GI function and motility, absorption of your nutrients.
But the other thing I want to mention for our
(22:50):
nervous system is physical activity. Nothing we can do out
of a bottle or any or pay for is going
to recreate what ysical activity does for a nervous system. Right.
It releases endorphins, it increases our blood flow, and it
may you know, physical activity is going to increase the
sympathetic side, but then as we finish and recover, we're
(23:13):
going to have an activation of the perisympathetic side. And sweating, right,
is going to help us with detoxification. So watch a
kid on a daily basis, and that's what we need
to be doing.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
It's so true. When my kids were young, I had
one day where I decided I was going to try
to move exactly how my two year old moved for
the whole day, and by like two pm, I was
completely and utterly exhausted because they squat and crawl and
climb so much. And it was really illustrated that for
me of like their constant motion and they're built like that,
which is awesome. And again there's so many lessons we
(23:48):
can learn from our kids. This podcast is brought to
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I talk a lot about nervous system on this podcast.
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pack with any order. Anytime there's talk of nervous system
regulation and nervous system health, I think about how easy
(28:09):
it is in modern society to become kind of detached
from under or integration into our nervous system, detach from
our bodies, and how we can run on programming that
was adopted or patterned when we were young, or programming
from others versus connecting deeply within ourselves. So I would
love any tips you have for helping break free from
that to sort of reconnecting with our bodies and our
(28:31):
nervous systems. And since it seems like kids are innately
very in tune with their nervous system, how we can
as parents support them in maintaining that connection.
Speaker 1 (28:40):
Yeah. So one of the things that I love and
was another big game changer if we're just starting with
the adults, is there's something called the five minute journal,
and it's when we also research shows that when we journal,
that supports the nervous system and you write down three
(29:01):
things you know, So I you know, I got the
five minute journal, and then I just do it on
my own now, so it's three things I'm grateful for,
three things that will make today great. And then you
do it at the you do it in the morning,
and you do it at the end of the day.
I am a night I'm a night oul. And instead
of fighting that. Now, I just I do my meditation
(29:22):
and I do my writing at night, and then when
I wake up right, I do my cold plunge and
I get outside. So it's more of a I kind
of get my mindset at night for the day. Right,
I'll write about we're going to have a great podcast,
and as the kids see you doing that, you give
them that maybe they have one word or they have
one thing, so that you were also getting ready for
(29:44):
the next day and thinking through and sending those intentions
to what's going to happen the next day. One of
my good friends, Kristin Oliver, she has written a wonderful book.
I think it's called The Connected Parent, but she talks
about it's feel what we feel, not what we say right,
And so that's where it's about embodying those things. And
(30:08):
just even touching your thumb to your finger is going
to help bring you into your body, and that's where
it's takes you back inside so that you're going to
be present where we are. And when you think about
just stop and take a breath during the day and
you realize how your brain may be a completely different space.
(30:32):
And I do a lot of hot yoga, so it's
sweating is detoxifying, but it's I could be, you know,
really riding high and once I get in there and
I get settled, it's right. It's a complete game changer.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
I love that. And I've also read your mentions of
wanting to see families belly laughing, and I would love
to talk about ways we can curate more joy and
playfulness into the healing process. This is another area I
think kids are naturally good at and that we can
learn from them about and that as adults we kind
of forget to stop playing. But what are some ways
we can bring that back into our lives and especially
(31:11):
in connection with our families, nurture that more.
Speaker 1 (31:14):
Yes, so doing whatever it is you love to do,
and I whether it's maybe you're playing a game of cards,
maybe you're doing like there is a hysterical game where
you do oh, I can't think of the name of
it right now, but you make up different accents and
you have to you know, you go around the table
(31:35):
or you are the physical activity kind of things, whether
it's volleyball. I have becind one of these people on
the pickleball craze. And when you're playing those things, for
some people it might be just you know, again, I
want it. It doesn't have to be something that's super expensive,
but it's something where you forget about everything else and
(31:57):
you're just right there and encourage kids, like maybe you
have a thing where they have to bring a joke
to the dinner table every night, and having those times
one where you're fostering things that are going to make
you laugh because getting the kids used to it, anticipating
(32:18):
that laughing, and then also doing those games, the sports
that you're right with pickleball, we laugh so hard on
the court because there's always right, there's they're just something
is always happening. And when you're setting the stage for
that having having fun, it's just right because you can't
(32:40):
just say, all right, we're going to sit down and
have fun now. It's something that you want to keep
building and creating the atmosphere so that those are the thing,
the times that you're going to have it right, the
times that you're going to just be sitting and if
kids see parents laughing and joking and having fun, that's
(33:05):
always going to be the biggest thing that's going to
encourage the kids to do that.
Speaker 2 (33:10):
Yeah, And I love how the theme of this conversation
goes back to largely free tools, that it's simply the
matter of making the habit around or integrating into our lives,
or understanding the importance of so that we schedule them
or prioritize them and not let them get pushed out
of our schedules. And some of the key takeaways I've
picked up from this or things like that, I joke
that I'm solar powered, but really, as humans, we kind
(33:32):
of are solar powered. And I say, like modern humans
kind of have nature deficit disorder, and to the degree
that we can reintegrate ourselves into nature, into natural light,
into walking outside and getting fresh air, like that's a
tremendous free tool that is at our fingertips at any time.
It also seems like a theme is small habits that
can make a big difference. These are not like two
(33:53):
hour a day practices. These are five minute things that
we can integrate that can really drastically shift the nervous system.
And as you've explained, when we support the nervous system,
we support literally everything I know. I was an example
of this, having been I was in for sure sympathetic
nervous system dominance for a decade and was trying all
the physical health things and had spreadsheets of supplements, and
(34:14):
it wasn't until I addressed the nervous system that all
of those things started working. And you also talked about
how nothing replaces activity and movement and how important that
is for us as humans. With so many practical takeaways,
I know you have tremendous resources available for people to
keep learning about this. But if people could only take
away one key insight from this conversation, what would do
(34:35):
you hope it would be or where would you encourage
them to start?
Speaker 1 (34:38):
Well, there's a psychologist psychotherapist. She's a Belgian psychotherapist, Eser
p Parrel, and she I love the quality of our
relationships determines the quality of our lives, right, And I
feel what I do in my day to day practice
is right. It's we're going to talk about nutrition, we're
(34:58):
going to talk about supplement, but the goal in all
of that is more belly laughs. And if we write
you can be sitting and meditating, which is great. We
want to do that because usually you're enhancing your relationships,
but if that also means cutting out certain relationships, keep
(35:21):
that in mind. And we just because we want to
foster these good relationships that enhance our lives and make
us feel better and kind of put away because it's
the It's almost like the Michelangelo, right. They said that,
like the Michelangelo, there was the rock and the David
was in there. He had to take away the rest
(35:43):
of it. So I think for a lot of us,
it's taking away what we don't need and the essence
has always been there, we just have to let it
come out.
Speaker 2 (35:54):
I love that. And where can people find you and
keep learning from you? And we're if parents want to
work with you directly with their children. Is that still possible?
Are you're taking new patients and how can they find
that information? Yeah?
Speaker 1 (36:06):
Absolutely so. Our website we have a brick and mortar
practice in Charlotte, North Carolina, and it's my website is
Shila Kilbaine dot com and there's a link you go
into the private practice and you can schedule a call
with our wonderful patiecare coordinator and she can kind of
talk you through what that process looks like. And I
(36:28):
have a book called Healthy Kids, Happy Moms, Seven Steps
to heal and Prevent common childhood illnesses. And we have
a lot of great resources online. We've got some great
downloads that you can you can download for free and
kind of look at the process of what we use
in our practice.
Speaker 2 (36:46):
Awesome. Well. I will put all of those links in
the show notes for any of you listening on the go.
Those will all be a Onnessmama dot com. Doctor Sheila,
you are a wealth of information and an absolute joy.
So fun to talk to and I'm always grateful for
our conversations and especially for your time. I know that
you help so many people and you have many requests
for your time. I'm honored that you chose to spend
it with me today. Thank you so much for being here.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Oh Katie, thank you. You do incredible work and I
so appreciate you.
Speaker 2 (37:13):
And thank you as always for sharing your most valuable resources,
your time, your energy, and your attention with us today.
We're both so grateful that you did and I hope
that you will join me again on the next episode
of the Wellness Moama podcast. If you're enjoying these interviews,
would you please take two minutes to leave a rating
or review on iTunes for me. Doing this helps more
(37:36):
people to find the podcast, which means even more moms
and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate
your time and thanks as always for listening.
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