January 6, 2020 • 29 mins
Catch V. Helena's interview with breast cancer survivor, NAACP award winner and Emmy nominated producer Evolyn Brooks Mack! They chat about Hollywood, rising above circumstances, and Evolyn's must read memoir, Her Name is Cranberry. This is part 1 of a 2 part series. #HerNameIsCranberry #InMySolitude
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Episode Transcript
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(00:54):
Hello, dream Catchers, and welcometo another great day in the writers Heaven.
I'm your host, and today instudio is one of my dearest dearest
friends. Award winning executive producer,showrunner, entrepreneur extraordinaire, and author,
Evelyn Brooks. Evelyn has production creditsfrom own Telepictures, Kingworld, Lifetime,
(01:17):
Bravo, WEE, MTV, Fox, b ET, CBS, and NBC.
And if that wasn't enough to impressthe masses, She's an NAACP Image
Award recipient and Emmy nominated producer.The list of accolades go on and on
and on, but today we're goingto move away from the glitz and glam
(01:38):
of Hollywood and go to the soulof this accomplished woman. Evelyn's book,
her name is Cranberry, How toBefriend Cancer when You're Fighting for your Life,
is an account of how she survivedbreast cancer and healed her mind,
body, and soul through prayer,acupuncture, reiky, meditation, a healthy
(02:01):
diet, and forgiveness. Join meand welcome me, my dear dear friend
and soul sister, Evan. Thankyou so much for having me. I
I happy to be here. Iam just so happy to have you here
to share your artistry with our audienceto talk about. I mean, there's
(02:23):
so many things to talk about withyou. I hope we have enough time
to cover everything. Yes, butI'm just happy that I just have you
as my friend and happy to myselfand just be able to just glean all
of your fantabulousness. And that's agood word. So so I I I'm
I'm happy to share. But youknow, there's, like I said,
(02:46):
there's just so much that you bringto the table, and I think that
you're just a real gift. Andso I'm I'm just gonna go ahead.
We're gonna get as far as wecan. May have to do another show,
part two. I want to haveto do a part two. So,
as I mentioned, I mean,you're this very very accomplished woman.
(03:07):
Talk to us about your story interms of how you got into the entertainment
industry, and then we'll talk alittle bit also about the challenge that birthed
your book. But let's start withhow you first started in the industry.
Okay, Well, it's interesting becauseit all goes back to my hometown of
(03:29):
Cleveland, Ohio, and I wantedto work in media. I was trying
to decide whether or not I wantedto be on air, like as a
broadcast journalist, or whether I wantedto work in print. So when I
was in college, I worked atthe newspaper. So I was editor of
the newspaper. And then I hadto, you know, do internships in
(03:50):
the whole nine yards. So Ihad an internship at the ABC affiliate and
the NBC affiliate there, and Ihad this amazing producer. His name well,
no, he was a professor.His name was Jaywon Lee. And
I really like took to him andhe was my mentor, and he just
really like kind of took me underhis wing and and connected me with you
(04:14):
know, different people at the stationstold me who to talk to. So
I decided that I was going togo into broadcasting. Right. So my
first job was at the NBC affiliate. Right. And you know, when
you talk about like how did youstart your career, most people don't think
it starts on the night shift.That's where mine started. It started as
(04:38):
a a news desk assistant. Well, you know what, there's nothing,
there's no prout work, Yeah,because everything leads to something. If you're
thinking about where you're trying to takeit, you know, That's how I
look at it. So my shiftwas like eleven PM to seven and so,
and I listened to scanners. Thatwas my job to listen to scanners
(04:59):
at night and then to like findout like where the fire happened or where
the murder happened or whatever, andso you know, eyes like barely open,
I'm listening. And so I realizedthat, Okay, you could do
this job forever if you don't figureout how to you know, move forward.
And so my dream was to bea reporter, to be a morning
(05:20):
anchor. So I was just like, okay, how am I going to
make that happen? So what Idecided was I had to get a tape
right, because that was the thing. You had to get your tape made
and you had to send it out, get your reel together. So clearly
I had none of that right.So I basically did something where which I
(05:41):
think is at the heart of everythingthat you're trying to build in terms of
a career, and that's building relationships. So I just made sure that I
got to know everyone at my station, so from you know, the editors
to the producers, everybody. Sowhat I was able to do. When
everybody went home at seven o'clock inthe morning, I stayed on and I
(06:04):
rode with the photographers that went outto get footage of whatever happened, you
know, overnight, and then Iwould get out and I would do a
stand up and then I would writemy story, and then I would go
back and I had befriended the editorsand then they literally would let me voice
the story and then I basically wouldmake a story. Wow, So I
(06:29):
got I guess how many. Ithink I had about six stories together at
one point, and then I hada reel, so I just I thought
it was hot stuff. I hada real and I think I had been
there, like, you know,a couple of months, but that overnight
shift was a lot, so Iwas like truly determined to figure out how
to get out. So anyway,I finally got a reel together, and
(06:53):
it wasn't as easy as I thought. I sent out about sixty tapes all
over the country trying to get myfirst job on air, which was kind
of crazy when you think about it, because I didn't have any real experience
other than the fact that I thoughtthat that's where I should be and you're
not the kind of person that wouldlet that stop you. No, let's
just say that it did not.It did not stop me. But in
(07:15):
my mind, I was already there. It was just a matter of getting
that one. Yes, I lovethat visualization that you just said. That's
so important in your mind, youwere already there. Yes, Yeah,
I know we're gonna talk more aboutthat. Yes, in my mind,
I was already there. I justhad to find the person who saw me
there as well. Right, SoI literally I sent out all of those
(07:38):
tapes and I got my first job. And my first job was in Toledo
at WNWO and it was the sixtyfifth market, which was pretty amazing.
Like I started at the fifteenth market, which but I was, you know,
a desk assistant. But my firstjob was at the in the sixty
fifth market, which I thought wasa pretty good place to start. And
(07:59):
I got out of that after sixmonths. Wow. And that was faster
than any d N News desk assistantin the history of the station. So
that was kind of like the start. And that was really like kind of
the tactics that I used all theway to the Los Angeles, you know,
trying to figure out how what whatwhat is? What do I see
(08:24):
that somebody else doesn't see, youknow what I mean? And figuring out
how to find a pl your placeand how to find it and and how
to create relationships with people so thatthey want to help you right right right.
And so that was the foundation ofyour matriculation through the industry to work
(08:46):
with some really big names in theindustry. You know, you've worked with
own and you know the whole listof channels and networks that I mentioned before
that it it was that that younglady, that young woman who visualized that
she was already there and allowed thatvision to just guide her and lead her
(09:09):
into her purpose. Yeah, youknow, something that we talk about a
lot. Yeah, and it wasso important. I think the thing that
that happened once I got to Toledothat I think is really important and I
think that truly helped me kind offind my purpose, which was producing you
know. And when I lived there, there was a lot going on in
(09:31):
terms of in the community. Therewas a lot of gang violence that was
happening at that particular time, andI was out in the street as a
journalist covering it a lot of times, and I saw myself having to go
to someone's house after, you know, a murder and ask the family how
(09:52):
are you feeling? And it's like, well, how do you think they're
feeling? And it was just somuch going on and I and I,
you know, I was by it. And in a lot of times,
as a journalist, you have tokind of be impartial and report the story.
But I just saw a story thatneeded to be more deeply reported,
so in terms of the source,the issue underneath all of this violence that
(10:18):
was occurring. So I went tomy news director and I said, I
want to do like a special,like a one hour special, and no
one had ever done that before,and he was just like okay, And
so we did a one hour specialon teen violence and you know, parents
were there, kids were there,teachers were there, gang members were there.
(10:45):
We got the entire community to cometogether and talk about this issue.
And that changed the trajectory of mylife because I thought, wow, not
it's one thing to observe and reportwhat's happening, but it's an another thing
to be able to shape and shiftthe narrative. And that was a very
powerful thing for me to see,and and I decided, let's go in
(11:09):
that direct direction. Yeah. Yeah, and we're so happy that you did.
Now the book itself, which II do want to, you know,
definitely marry the discussion with the bookbecause the book so personal, so
intentional. It is a very bigpart of who you are in terms of
(11:33):
how you have allowed your circumstances tonot be an obstacle or be overwhelming,
that you did not allow it totake your power right away. I love
that the way that you say thatin the book. And I'm gonna there
are a couple of things I'm gonnahighlight from your book that I'm that I'm
gonna you know, actually read from, but but talk about. So you
(11:56):
are a cancer breast cancer breastien survivor, how did your diagnosis impact and since
we're talking about your career now,let let's talk about how that diagnosis impacted
your career. You talked about,you know, y, how that instance
of creating that one hour special justkind of changed the trajectory of your life.
(12:20):
And in terms of timing and thechronology of that happening and getting the
diagnosis, how impactful was that,Well, it was extremely impactful because you
know, when you receive a breastcancer diagnosis. It really uh forces you
to step back and really look atyour life and decide what is important,
(12:48):
what is valuable, how do youwant to spend your time, how do
you want to spend your energy,and how do you create something that is
bigger than just you so that itresonates. Because the first thing you're thinking
is about your mortality, right,and you know it's this it and you
(13:09):
have to really take control of yourthoughts of course. Yeah, but then
you just start to kind of,you know, look at your life and
think about what is it that Iwant to do now because everything that I
did before and the way in whichI did it, you just you don't.
You want to do it differently.You have to do it differently.
(13:30):
Your body is telling you that youhave to do it differently. So I
think everything became more intentional. It'sjust like what do I have to share?
What do I have to give?And how could I take what I've
learned and use it to help otherpeople? Yeah? Yeah, And so
(13:52):
how were the lessons that you discussedin your book? How did that kind
of play into your life story?Because you know, you you have a
few things going on and I'll justgo ahead and mention some of the things
that that I'm specifically thinking about,because of course those who haven't read the
(14:13):
book have no idea, right right, or spoilers right right, right,
So so we're gonna do a littlebit of spoiling. So in your book,
it starts off you you talk aboutjust growing up and some of the
life lessons learned and just being ayoung person a l what is it safe
(14:35):
to say a little on the rebellioustime, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
but a little on the rebellious side. You know, your parents had somewhat
of a tumultuous relationship, and soas a young girl growing up and witnessing
that, I don't I don't knowhow much you would say that that kind
of directed your course in terms ofhow you look at relationships now, right
(14:56):
as a grown woman. But butbut let let's put a pin on on
that piece. And then there weresome other tragedies that occurred in your life
that with some women it could havegone a totally different way in terms of
how they handled that in their life. Yeah, do you want to talk
(15:18):
about it? Absolutely? So.You know, it's interesting when you think
about like how things happen in yourlife and how we all have a choice
to kind of decide is this goingto like take me out of here or
is this going to be something thathelps me evolve and kind of go deeper,
(15:41):
as you know, into my soul, into finding out who I am.
And so it's interesting because you know, prior to you know, going
to college and prior to determining whatI was going to do in my career,
whether it's journalism or broadcasting or whatever, you know, I was a
young girl growing up in a tumultuoushome because you know, my parents they
(16:07):
didn't get along very well. Andthere was a point where they separated and
I moved with my mother, andyou know, she had been married for
a very long time and you knowwas kind of like, you know,
a free woman so to speak.So she had a boyfriend and she that
person had a friend and they cameover our home one day when my mother
(16:33):
wasn't there. It was like aSaturday morning, and you know, I
thought this person was a good person. I thought they were a friend of
my mother. So you know,I didn't know that I was doing anything
wrong. And you were seventeen.I was seventeen, and so I opened
the door and then you know,there was this moment where I had an
(16:56):
intuition like, you know, don'topen the door, you know, But
it was just like I didn't knowthen how to own that. I didn't
know to trust that yet. Itwas something that was still well would certainly
developed after that, but at thetime I just thought, uh, i
ope. But as soon as Iopened the door, I smelled alcohol,
and I'm like, oh, Ishouldn't have opened the door, and so
(17:19):
he came into our home and atthat time he raped me at gunpoint,
and so for me, it wasjust kind of like, you know,
it was kind of like one ofthose moments where you're like trapped in your
(17:41):
own body, right and you can'tescape what's happening, but you're trying to
stay present so that you can survive, you know what I mean. You're
thinking, it's like one of thosethings where you're like, you're trying not
to make the wrong move because itcould be yeah, because there's a gun.
(18:03):
You want to live, and thenyou're trying to figure out how do
I you know, you're afraid toscream because then you'll get you know,
he might shoot you or whatever.So then the craziest thing and this is
how I just always know. It'slike my life. I feel like it's
just I have a little angel somewhere, it's God intuition. I just you
(18:29):
know, there are moments in lifewhen you know that you're guided and you're
protected. And so literally he gotup and he started to run out the
house, and then I just thought, okay, this is so bizarre.
And then I was laying there andthen I just heard a voice that said,
(18:51):
get up and close the door.And I got up. I ran
to the door. I closed thedoor literally like pushing the door or closed
because he had run up the stepswith two other guys, and literally if
like, I don't even know whatwould have happened if I had not gotten
(19:11):
up and closed the door. Andso when and then you know, obviously
I won't support to tell the restof it that's in the book, but
that moment, you know, itcaused a huge divide between you know,
my mother and myself because you feltto some degree that that was her fault.
(19:34):
Well I felt unprotected, yeah,you know it with some accountability,
Yeah, I just I felt like, okay, you know because in that
moment, she was kind of like, well, why didn't I open the
door, and I just like,well, why is this person in our
house? Home? Like, youknow what I mean, I'm assuming that
(19:55):
whomever you allow in our home isgoing to be safe, a good per
you know what I mean. Soit created a rift between us that literally
was not healed for you know,at least another maybe ten years. And
it just so happened. It comesfull circle, and you'll read that in
(20:17):
the book, but it the healingof our relationship came together when I was
a journalist in Toledo and she hadbreast cancer and she came to stay with
me, and she was able toattend the first that that special that I
created. And so we had areally full circle moment in the midst of
(20:42):
everything, because it's like you assumewhen someone is sick that they that they
change or whatever, and so therewas there was some element of change,
and there was definitely growth, butwe had to really work it out.
But it was just a sacred momentbecause part of of moving through any challenge
(21:03):
or tragedy or anything that happens inyour life, it does boil down to
forgiveness. It boils down to forgivenessof you yourself, and it also boils
down to forgiveness of that person,not forgetting, not allowing that person back
into your life. But it isimportant to be able to release them as
(21:26):
well, because what I've learned isthat everyone is in process. We're all
kind of making mistakes. You know, if we knew better, we would
do better. You know. Idon't know what happened to that young man,
you know what I mean. Inever saw him again. But what
I know is that whenever we doanything, whenever we do anyone harm,
(21:52):
it stays with that person, andit stays with them. So I know
that that because that day and thatmoment was a turning point in my life,
I know that it had to bein his as well, you know
what I mean. But for meto go on, I had to release
him and not give him the powerto impact my life. Understanding that this
(22:14):
is a seventeen year old young womanwho doesn't have the benefit of life experiences
and exposure to other things to beable to turn that situation around in a
way that you didn't allow it totake your power away. I mean,
(22:36):
for me, this is my testimony, you know, because you know,
I think about you know, whenI was young, right when I was
I don't know. It's interesting whennow when I think you think about the
trajectory, and that's my word,today's trajectory, but when you think about
(22:59):
things that have happened, right,And so my parents were not necessarily religious,
right, But I had an auntwho was right. Her name was
Aunt Elvira, and she went toBlack Church, right, And I just
(23:21):
remember that I would just beg myparents, like, can I spend the
night over on Elvira's house? AndI had cousins and everything like that,
because we would always go to church. And I mean, and that was
probably started when I was like sevenor eight or something like that, and
I just used to love to goto church with her. There was something
(23:42):
about the ushers and their white shirtsand you know, walking and then you
know, and you always had apretty dress on, and then we went
back to her house when we bakeda cake and ow nine yards. It
was always like I just loved theritual of it all and then the family
aspect of it because we would allgo together. And so those are like
(24:03):
early memories. So I can't say, you know, I grew up in
the church and you know, andit was always there for me. But
I remember that was kind of anearly part of my development, so to
speak. And then when I gotto high school, one of my best
friends, I started to go tochurch with her, Right, and then
(24:29):
I got baptized when I was likefifteen years old. Right, didn't ask
my parents or anything. I justdecided that I wanted to do that.
So but I always felt like aspiritual connection that was just my relationship.
Nobody had to make me go orwhatever. And so it's interesting when I
say that, I always feel likeI've been guided that that happened when I
(24:52):
was fifteen, and then two yearslater, this thing happens in my life,
and so I feel like that thatwas God like guiding me, protecting
me. You know where that is, where it comes from, and it
is something that you know when youread the book. And when we get
(25:12):
to Cranberry again, it's that thatsame through line where it's like I'll find
myself in these kind of life ordeath situations and I'll just I'll have a
dream, I'll hear a voice orwhatever, and it'll say do this,
and then I'll do it, andthen it'll like shift the trajectory of that
(25:33):
moment. That's third trajectory number heard, but shift that moment, you know
what I mean. So I justfor me that that is what it is,
you know, and I just feellike, you know, everything else
kind of revolves around that. Ithink that's kind of what I moved to.
It's like, you know, Imeditate, you know, I love
(25:55):
reiki, eating, well, allof those things. But for me,
me, the most important thing,you know, when I wake up every
morning, it is to center myself. It is to say my prayers,
it is to connect and then goout into the world. But it's not
the other way around. Yeah.Yeah, thank you so much for joining
(26:15):
us in the Haven and sharing yourstory and your life's work and just being
the inspiration that you are. Thankyou so much. So glad to come.
You're so easy to talk to.Oh my god. I was so
nervous, I really was, butit was just it was wonderful and just
thank you for having me, andI really appreciate the opportunity. That's that's
(26:40):
what really really really feels great tonight. Yeah, where we go. We're
(27:30):
gonna go out there to rain,gonna get away, all right, we
gonna okay, Oh yeah, somuch fun. Im. Everybody has a
(28:03):
dream. Mine was to see theocean, and with a little help,
I made it. This is themoment I knew his future had no boundaries.
(28:51):
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Hello, dream Catchers, and welcometo another great day in the writers Heaven.
I'm your host, and today instudio is one of my dearest dearest
friends. Award winning executive producer,showrunner, entrepreneur extraordinaire, and author,
Evelyn Brooks. Evelyn has production creditsfrom own Telepictures, Kingworld, Lifetime,
(01:17):
Bravo, WEE, MTV, Fox, b ET, CBS, and NBC.
And if that wasn't enough to impressthe masses, She's an NAACP Image
Award recipient and Emmy nominated producer.The list of accolades go on and on
and on, but today we're goingto move away from the glitz and glam
(01:38):
of Hollywood and go to the soulof this accomplished woman. Evelyn's book,
her name is Cranberry, How toBefriend Cancer when You're Fighting for your Life,
is an account of how she survivedbreast cancer and healed her mind,
body, and soul through prayer,acupuncture, reiky, meditation, a healthy
(02:01):
diet, and forgiveness. Join meand welcome me, my dear dear friend
and soul sister, Evan. Thankyou so much for having me. I
I happy to be here. Iam just so happy to have you here
to share your artistry with our audienceto talk about. I mean, there's
(02:23):
so many things to talk about withyou. I hope we have enough time
to cover everything. Yes, butI'm just happy that I just have you
as my friend and happy to myselfand just be able to just glean all
of your fantabulousness. And that's agood word. So so I I I'm
I'm happy to share. But youknow, there's, like I said,
(02:46):
there's just so much that you bringto the table, and I think that
you're just a real gift. Andso I'm I'm just gonna go ahead.
We're gonna get as far as wecan. May have to do another show,
part two. I want to haveto do a part two. So,
as I mentioned, I mean,you're this very very accomplished woman.
(03:07):
Talk to us about your story interms of how you got into the entertainment
industry, and then we'll talk alittle bit also about the challenge that birthed
your book. But let's start withhow you first started in the industry.
Okay, Well, it's interesting becauseit all goes back to my hometown of
(03:29):
Cleveland, Ohio, and I wantedto work in media. I was trying
to decide whether or not I wantedto be on air, like as a
broadcast journalist, or whether I wantedto work in print. So when I
was in college, I worked atthe newspaper. So I was editor of
the newspaper. And then I hadto, you know, do internships in
(03:50):
the whole nine yards. So Ihad an internship at the ABC affiliate and
the NBC affiliate there, and Ihad this amazing producer. His name well,
no, he was a professor.His name was Jaywon Lee. And
I really like took to him andhe was my mentor, and he just
really like kind of took me underhis wing and and connected me with you
(04:14):
know, different people at the stationstold me who to talk to. So
I decided that I was going togo into broadcasting. Right. So my
first job was at the NBC affiliate. Right. And you know, when
you talk about like how did youstart your career, most people don't think
it starts on the night shift.That's where mine started. It started as
(04:38):
a a news desk assistant. Well, you know what, there's nothing,
there's no prout work, Yeah,because everything leads to something. If you're
thinking about where you're trying to takeit, you know, That's how I
look at it. So my shiftwas like eleven PM to seven and so,
and I listened to scanners. Thatwas my job to listen to scanners
(04:59):
at night and then to like findout like where the fire happened or where
the murder happened or whatever, andso you know, eyes like barely open,
I'm listening. And so I realizedthat, Okay, you could do
this job forever if you don't figureout how to you know, move forward.
And so my dream was to bea reporter, to be a morning
(05:20):
anchor. So I was just like, okay, how am I going to
make that happen? So what Idecided was I had to get a tape
right, because that was the thing. You had to get your tape made
and you had to send it out, get your reel together. So clearly
I had none of that right.So I basically did something where which I
(05:41):
think is at the heart of everythingthat you're trying to build in terms of
a career, and that's building relationships. So I just made sure that I
got to know everyone at my station, so from you know, the editors
to the producers, everybody. Sowhat I was able to do. When
everybody went home at seven o'clock inthe morning, I stayed on and I
(06:04):
rode with the photographers that went outto get footage of whatever happened, you
know, overnight, and then Iwould get out and I would do a
stand up and then I would writemy story, and then I would go
back and I had befriended the editorsand then they literally would let me voice
the story and then I basically wouldmake a story. Wow, So I
(06:29):
got I guess how many. Ithink I had about six stories together at
one point, and then I hada reel, so I just I thought
it was hot stuff. I hada real and I think I had been
there, like, you know,a couple of months, but that overnight
shift was a lot, so Iwas like truly determined to figure out how
to get out. So anyway,I finally got a reel together, and
(06:53):
it wasn't as easy as I thought. I sent out about sixty tapes all
over the country trying to get myfirst job on air, which was kind
of crazy when you think about it, because I didn't have any real experience
other than the fact that I thoughtthat that's where I should be and you're
not the kind of person that wouldlet that stop you. No, let's
just say that it did not.It did not stop me. But in
(07:15):
my mind, I was already there. It was just a matter of getting
that one. Yes, I lovethat visualization that you just said. That's
so important in your mind, youwere already there. Yes, Yeah,
I know we're gonna talk more aboutthat. Yes, in my mind,
I was already there. I justhad to find the person who saw me
there as well. Right, SoI literally I sent out all of those
(07:38):
tapes and I got my first job. And my first job was in Toledo
at WNWO and it was the sixtyfifth market, which was pretty amazing.
Like I started at the fifteenth market, which but I was, you know,
a desk assistant. But my firstjob was at the in the sixty
fifth market, which I thought wasa pretty good place to start. And
(07:59):
I got out of that after sixmonths. Wow. And that was faster
than any d N News desk assistantin the history of the station. So
that was kind of like the start. And that was really like kind of
the tactics that I used all theway to the Los Angeles, you know,
trying to figure out how what whatwhat is? What do I see
(08:24):
that somebody else doesn't see, youknow what I mean? And figuring out
how to find a pl your placeand how to find it and and how
to create relationships with people so thatthey want to help you right right right.
And so that was the foundation ofyour matriculation through the industry to work
(08:46):
with some really big names in theindustry. You know, you've worked with
own and you know the whole listof channels and networks that I mentioned before
that it it was that that younglady, that young woman who visualized that
she was already there and allowed thatvision to just guide her and lead her
(09:09):
into her purpose. Yeah, youknow, something that we talk about a
lot. Yeah, and it wasso important. I think the thing that
that happened once I got to Toledothat I think is really important and I
think that truly helped me kind offind my purpose, which was producing you
know. And when I lived there, there was a lot going on in
(09:31):
terms of in the community. Therewas a lot of gang violence that was
happening at that particular time, andI was out in the street as a
journalist covering it a lot of times, and I saw myself having to go
to someone's house after, you know, a murder and ask the family how
(09:52):
are you feeling? And it's like, well, how do you think they're
feeling? And it was just somuch going on and I and I,
you know, I was by it. And in a lot of times,
as a journalist, you have tokind of be impartial and report the story.
But I just saw a story thatneeded to be more deeply reported,
so in terms of the source,the issue underneath all of this violence that
(10:18):
was occurring. So I went tomy news director and I said, I
want to do like a special,like a one hour special, and no
one had ever done that before,and he was just like okay, And
so we did a one hour specialon teen violence and you know, parents
were there, kids were there,teachers were there, gang members were there.
(10:45):
We got the entire community to cometogether and talk about this issue.
And that changed the trajectory of mylife because I thought, wow, not
it's one thing to observe and reportwhat's happening, but it's an another thing
to be able to shape and shiftthe narrative. And that was a very
powerful thing for me to see,and and I decided, let's go in
(11:09):
that direct direction. Yeah. Yeah, and we're so happy that you did.
Now the book itself, which II do want to, you know,
definitely marry the discussion with the bookbecause the book so personal, so
intentional. It is a very bigpart of who you are in terms of
(11:33):
how you have allowed your circumstances tonot be an obstacle or be overwhelming,
that you did not allow it totake your power right away. I love
that the way that you say thatin the book. And I'm gonna there
are a couple of things I'm gonnahighlight from your book that I'm that I'm
gonna you know, actually read from, but but talk about. So you
(11:56):
are a cancer breast cancer breastien survivor, how did your diagnosis impact and since
we're talking about your career now,let let's talk about how that diagnosis impacted
your career. You talked about,you know, y, how that instance
of creating that one hour special justkind of changed the trajectory of your life.
(12:20):
And in terms of timing and thechronology of that happening and getting the
diagnosis, how impactful was that,Well, it was extremely impactful because you
know, when you receive a breastcancer diagnosis. It really uh forces you
to step back and really look atyour life and decide what is important,
(12:48):
what is valuable, how do youwant to spend your time, how do
you want to spend your energy,and how do you create something that is
bigger than just you so that itresonates. Because the first thing you're thinking
is about your mortality, right,and you know it's this it and you
(13:09):
have to really take control of yourthoughts of course. Yeah, but then
you just start to kind of,you know, look at your life and
think about what is it that Iwant to do now because everything that I
did before and the way in whichI did it, you just you don't.
You want to do it differently.You have to do it differently.
(13:30):
Your body is telling you that youhave to do it differently. So I
think everything became more intentional. It'sjust like what do I have to share?
What do I have to give?And how could I take what I've
learned and use it to help otherpeople? Yeah? Yeah, And so
(13:52):
how were the lessons that you discussedin your book? How did that kind
of play into your life story?Because you know, you you have a
few things going on and I'll justgo ahead and mention some of the things
that that I'm specifically thinking about,because of course those who haven't read the
(14:13):
book have no idea, right right, or spoilers right right, right,
So so we're gonna do a littlebit of spoiling. So in your book,
it starts off you you talk aboutjust growing up and some of the
life lessons learned and just being ayoung person a l what is it safe
(14:35):
to say a little on the rebellioustime, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
but a little on the rebellious side. You know, your parents had somewhat
of a tumultuous relationship, and soas a young girl growing up and witnessing
that, I don't I don't knowhow much you would say that that kind
of directed your course in terms ofhow you look at relationships now, right
(14:56):
as a grown woman. But butbut let let's put a pin on on
that piece. And then there weresome other tragedies that occurred in your life
that with some women it could havegone a totally different way in terms of
how they handled that in their life. Yeah, do you want to talk
(15:18):
about it? Absolutely? So.You know, it's interesting when you think
about like how things happen in yourlife and how we all have a choice
to kind of decide is this goingto like take me out of here or
is this going to be something thathelps me evolve and kind of go deeper,
(15:41):
as you know, into my soul, into finding out who I am.
And so it's interesting because you know, prior to you know, going
to college and prior to determining whatI was going to do in my career,
whether it's journalism or broadcasting or whatever, you know, I was a
young girl growing up in a tumultuoushome because you know, my parents they
(16:07):
didn't get along very well. Andthere was a point where they separated and
I moved with my mother, andyou know, she had been married for
a very long time and you knowwas kind of like, you know,
a free woman so to speak.So she had a boyfriend and she that
person had a friend and they cameover our home one day when my mother
(16:33):
wasn't there. It was like aSaturday morning, and you know, I
thought this person was a good person. I thought they were a friend of
my mother. So you know,I didn't know that I was doing anything
wrong. And you were seventeen.I was seventeen, and so I opened
the door and then you know,there was this moment where I had an
(16:56):
intuition like, you know, don'topen the door, you know, But
it was just like I didn't knowthen how to own that. I didn't
know to trust that yet. Itwas something that was still well would certainly
developed after that, but at thetime I just thought, uh, i
ope. But as soon as Iopened the door, I smelled alcohol,
and I'm like, oh, Ishouldn't have opened the door, and so
(17:19):
he came into our home and atthat time he raped me at gunpoint,
and so for me, it wasjust kind of like, you know,
it was kind of like one ofthose moments where you're like trapped in your
(17:41):
own body, right and you can'tescape what's happening, but you're trying to
stay present so that you can survive, you know what I mean. You're
thinking, it's like one of thosethings where you're like, you're trying not
to make the wrong move because itcould be yeah, because there's a gun.
(18:03):
You want to live, and thenyou're trying to figure out how do
I you know, you're afraid toscream because then you'll get you know,
he might shoot you or whatever.So then the craziest thing and this is
how I just always know. It'slike my life. I feel like it's
just I have a little angel somewhere, it's God intuition. I just you
(18:29):
know, there are moments in lifewhen you know that you're guided and you're
protected. And so literally he gotup and he started to run out the
house, and then I just thought, okay, this is so bizarre.
And then I was laying there andthen I just heard a voice that said,
(18:51):
get up and close the door.And I got up. I ran
to the door. I closed thedoor literally like pushing the door or closed
because he had run up the stepswith two other guys, and literally if
like, I don't even know whatwould have happened if I had not gotten
(19:11):
up and closed the door. Andso when and then you know, obviously
I won't support to tell the restof it that's in the book, but
that moment, you know, itcaused a huge divide between you know,
my mother and myself because you feltto some degree that that was her fault.
(19:34):
Well I felt unprotected, yeah,you know it with some accountability,
Yeah, I just I felt like, okay, you know because in that
moment, she was kind of like, well, why didn't I open the
door, and I just like,well, why is this person in our
house? Home? Like, youknow what I mean, I'm assuming that
(19:55):
whomever you allow in our home isgoing to be safe, a good per
you know what I mean. Soit created a rift between us that literally
was not healed for you know,at least another maybe ten years. And
it just so happened. It comesfull circle, and you'll read that in
(20:17):
the book, but it the healingof our relationship came together when I was
a journalist in Toledo and she hadbreast cancer and she came to stay with
me, and she was able toattend the first that that special that I
created. And so we had areally full circle moment in the midst of
(20:42):
everything, because it's like you assumewhen someone is sick that they that they
change or whatever, and so therewas there was some element of change,
and there was definitely growth, butwe had to really work it out.
But it was just a sacred momentbecause part of of moving through any challenge
(21:03):
or tragedy or anything that happens inyour life, it does boil down to
forgiveness. It boils down to forgivenessof you yourself, and it also boils
down to forgiveness of that person,not forgetting, not allowing that person back
into your life. But it isimportant to be able to release them as
(21:26):
well, because what I've learned isthat everyone is in process. We're all
kind of making mistakes. You know, if we knew better, we would
do better. You know. Idon't know what happened to that young man,
you know what I mean. Inever saw him again. But what
I know is that whenever we doanything, whenever we do anyone harm,
(21:52):
it stays with that person, andit stays with them. So I know
that that because that day and thatmoment was a turning point in my life,
I know that it had to bein his as well, you know
what I mean. But for meto go on, I had to release
him and not give him the powerto impact my life. Understanding that this
(22:14):
is a seventeen year old young womanwho doesn't have the benefit of life experiences
and exposure to other things to beable to turn that situation around in a
way that you didn't allow it totake your power away. I mean,
(22:36):
for me, this is my testimony, you know, because you know,
I think about you know, whenI was young, right when I was
I don't know. It's interesting whennow when I think you think about the
trajectory, and that's my word,today's trajectory, but when you think about
(22:59):
things that have happened, right,And so my parents were not necessarily religious,
right, But I had an auntwho was right. Her name was
Aunt Elvira, and she went toBlack Church, right, And I just
(23:21):
remember that I would just beg myparents, like, can I spend the
night over on Elvira's house? AndI had cousins and everything like that,
because we would always go to church. And I mean, and that was
probably started when I was like sevenor eight or something like that, and
I just used to love to goto church with her. There was something
(23:42):
about the ushers and their white shirtsand you know, walking and then you
know, and you always had apretty dress on, and then we went
back to her house when we bakeda cake and ow nine yards. It
was always like I just loved theritual of it all and then the family
aspect of it because we would allgo together. And so those are like
(24:03):
early memories. So I can't say, you know, I grew up in
the church and you know, andit was always there for me. But
I remember that was kind of anearly part of my development, so to
speak. And then when I gotto high school, one of my best
friends, I started to go tochurch with her, Right, and then
(24:29):
I got baptized when I was likefifteen years old. Right, didn't ask
my parents or anything. I justdecided that I wanted to do that.
So but I always felt like aspiritual connection that was just my relationship.
Nobody had to make me go orwhatever. And so it's interesting when I
say that, I always feel likeI've been guided that that happened when I
(24:52):
was fifteen, and then two yearslater, this thing happens in my life,
and so I feel like that thatwas God like guiding me, protecting
me. You know where that is, where it comes from, and it
is something that you know when youread the book. And when we get
(25:12):
to Cranberry again, it's that thatsame through line where it's like I'll find
myself in these kind of life ordeath situations and I'll just I'll have a
dream, I'll hear a voice orwhatever, and it'll say do this,
and then I'll do it, andthen it'll like shift the trajectory of that
(25:33):
moment. That's third trajectory number heard, but shift that moment, you know
what I mean. So I justfor me that that is what it is,
you know, and I just feellike, you know, everything else
kind of revolves around that. Ithink that's kind of what I moved to.
It's like, you know, Imeditate, you know, I love
(25:55):
reiki, eating, well, allof those things. But for me,
me, the most important thing,you know, when I wake up every
morning, it is to center myself. It is to say my prayers,
it is to connect and then goout into the world. But it's not
the other way around. Yeah.Yeah, thank you so much for joining
(26:15):
us in the Haven and sharing yourstory and your life's work and just being
the inspiration that you are. Thankyou so much. So glad to come.
You're so easy to talk to.Oh my god. I was so
nervous, I really was, butit was just it was wonderful and just
thank you for having me, andI really appreciate the opportunity. That's that's
(26:40):
what really really really feels great tonight. Yeah, where we go. We're
(27:30):
gonna go out there to rain,gonna get away, all right, we
gonna okay, Oh yeah, somuch fun. Im. Everybody has a
(28:03):
dream. Mine was to see theocean, and with a little help,
I made it. This is themoment I knew his future had no boundaries.
(28:51):
There are some moments only the forestcan inspire. Find yours at Discoverthforest
dot org. Hey, did youknow two point four million loving cats and
dogs and shelters and rescues need ourhelp to find a home. Let's go
to the Shelter Pet Project dot organd meet if you are in a shelter
near you. Harlow. She's onegreat listener and loves to hear all your
(29:12):
stories. My kind of cat's Rulo. There's a sweet, goofy boy who's
eager to please. Sounds just likeanother dog I know. So go to
the Shelter Pet Project dot org,search your local shelters and rescues and go
for a cuddle with your next bestfriend. Adopt
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